#maybe the next one should be a bit sillier tho?

[roze-sloth]

[random excerpt #01: Dazai calls on Akutagawa to involve him in a certain team-up, but Akutagawa has something he wants to know first...]

* * *

Dazai: **leaning casually against the wall of a deserted, isolated warehouse** Ah, Akutagawa-kun --just the person I wanted to see. I have a job for you. It seems we're in need of that lethal grace of yours.

Akutagawa: **narrows his eyes** .... Another job with the weretiger, I presume?

Dazai: **smirking calmly** Ah, you catch on quickly! Well, you two make such a dynamic duo, don't you think?

Akutagawa: **clenching his fists at his sides** I do not need to hear your attempts at sarcasm right now. Instead, why don't you tell me, this: why should I have to cooperate with someone whom I can barely stomach?

Dazai: **takes a step forward and leans in** Well, besides the fact that you both make quite the formidable team on the battlefield? It's a good way to ensure a harmonious working environment between factions, don't you agree?

Akutagawa: **gritting his teeth** --I don't care about that; not about the Armed Detective Agency's peace, nor the weretiger's well-being. Now, I'll ask you once more: the benefit to any others' aside-- why should I team up with someone who's nothing more than an obstacle to me?

Dazai: **chuckles** You say that, Akutagawa-kun, but deep down, you must actually already realize the potential of your partnership, am I wrong? Two powerful abilities working together, pushing each other to grow, and complimenting your strengths, as well making up for your respective weaknesses?... Under my command?— Quite the force to be reckoned with-- just think about it.

Akutagawa: **his glare darkens** .... This isn't about strength, however. Nor is it about complimenting each other in battle; I'm not so blind that I can't see this is a matter of constant comparison.... You want to see whether I can measure up to the tiger, is that it? The one you continue to doubt... is me, isn't it?

Dazai: **smiling, his gaze unreadable** ... Observation skills as sharp as ever. But it's not only about comparison, Akutagawa-kun; its as I told you, it's about pushing you both to reach your fullest potential.

Akutagawa: **furrows his brow** I don't need you to lead me by the nose to achieve that, Dazai-san... I will prove my worth and strength to you on my own, without needing to rely on the weretiger.

Dazai: **leaning back, almost appraising** Hmm. Really? Suit yourself. But remember, Akutagawa-kun, sometimes the strongest move is the one made together; think it over when your head's more clear. **turns, getting ready to leave**

Akutagawa: …. You say that, but-- aren't you constantly going off alone and doing things on your own? Devising plans, orchestrating moves... alone. **a narrow-eyed glare** Or do you mean to suggest that your moving others around like chess pieces, is your idea of making moves 'together'…. So why is it different only for you, Dazai-san?

Dazai: **turning around again, a hint of seriousness in his eyes** Akutagawa-kun, my solo endeavors are merely a means to an end-- a chaotic dance to keep others on their toes. But when it comes to you and Atsushi-kun, the potential lies in combining your strengths, not conflicting them. It's about ensuring that chaos works in our favor, not against it. Consider it a strategic necessity, if you will.

Akutagawa: **raises a brow faintly** So, what... you're the maestro, and the rest of us are just the players you've deemed qualified to create the symphony of your desired orchestra? But if one falters, they can simply be thrown away and replaced-- just as long as the concerto ultimately unfolds as you planned, that's what matters to you - am I wrong? **a pause, and then, quietly** ...You may have abandoned the Port Mafia, but your methods haven't changed at all, Dazai-san.

Dazai: **leans in, a cryptic smile playing on his lips** You've become more perceptive since my departure from the Mafia, Akutagawa-kun. But remember, even a maestro needs a symphony worth conducting. Your talents and Atsushi-kun's happen to add the perfect crescendo to my arrangement, however... it's not about replacing, but enhancing. Think of it as a collaboration, not a solo act. Now-- what do you say? Will you play your part?

Akutagawa: **eyes narrow, but he hesitates** …. I … **a pause, before continuing more sternly** --I have a condition first. Just one. Answer me what I ask and I will -grudgingly- lend my full cooperation.

Dazai: **smirks** Oh? Very well, then... ask away, Akutagawa-kun. I'm feeling particularly generous today, too.

Akutagawa: **glaring, taking a small step forward** …. Back then… why-- why did you leave? Why didn't you say anything before you left? **his brow creases with agitation** You disappeared without a word…. ( 'without even a goodbye'… but he doesn't say it aloud) you brought me into the Port Mafia and then left me behind, discarded -- tell me why?! **his obvious fury masks the despair**

Dazai: **his expression grows serious** You're asking a difficult question, Akutagawa-kun. **pauses** .... I had my reasons, but they're complicated and deeply personal. Believe it or not, there are matters that even I struggle to put into words. **gazes into the distance thoughtfully** ... I left when I felt it was necessary, not on a simple whim. And sometimes, perhaps, leaving without a word is a strategy in itself.

Akutagawa: A... strategy... ? **a pause** …. Is that really the reason? **his tone is cold and hard**

Dazai: **nods** That's right, Akutagawa-kun. It might be hard for you to understand, but sometimes the less you know, the safer you are. **sighs** It wasn't a decision made lightly, nor without its share of internal conflicts. But now, we have a different mission to focus on-- are you able to put aside our personal matters for the task at hand?

Akutagawa: **stares at him intently for a moment, then quickly averts his gaze again** …. I see. I think … I can understand it a little better, now. Yes… **a contemplative but softer tone** Very well. I'll fulfill this mission-- without fail, and with as little of that bumbling tiger's interference as possible! So, this time... watch me, Dazai-san. **his fists clench in determination**

Dazai: **smiles** That's the spirit, Akutagawa-kun. I believe in your abilities, but just remember that this mission is for the greater good, and sometimes we must endure the company of those we aren't particularly keen on, to protect the well-being of many others. **pauses** Now, let's go meet up with Atsushi-kun and get this show on the road.

[stanharu]

beastars episode 24 thoughts!

this post got kinda long i have Many Thoughts on this one

Overall I had fun watching this ep but I could really tell it was rushed and there was so much that got cut, which makes me super sad. our fears about the finale having pacing issues due to all the added scenes & rearranging were confirmed & it rly sucks, but i'll elaborate more on that in a bit.

this week's ep covered the end of chapter 92, chapters 93-97, and included small bits of chapters 98 & 99.

so the ep starts with the ED and the latter part of the tunnel scene with ibuki and louis. i liked the visual effect they used to show that they were in the dark. louis' voice acting was also On Point. for the most part i think this scene was done pretty well but I can tell it's being rushed also. I really wish we got more buildup and narration instead of just jumping straight to ibuki telling louis to shoot him. the way it is in the anime feels less impactful imo.

also im sad we didnt get to see this in the anime

before i move on, i wanna talk a bit about louis and his relationship w/ the shishigumi and ibuki. i feel like in the anime quite a few of the lil moments that really endear you to the shishigumi and also ibuki were either cut or kinda glossed over, which is strange to me considering how much effort and care went into the ED. it's very emotional and good but i feel like maybe anime onlies are missing out only seeing the anime and the MV. but idk.

legosi and riz's fight was quite rushed as well. there's so much narration and dialogue missing from it and that really rubs me the wrong way. It wasn't all bad but compared to the manga I just don't think it's as good. I will say tho that I really liked the sequence w legosi and the moths. I thought it looked really nice and was pretty well done.

also i liked how the backgrounds had some anti-yahya graffiti, its a nice touch imo

it says "high quality horse meat"

I was happy to see legosi do the "tell me more" pose but I'm honestly disappointed that the anime took out the whole exposition about why legosi did it. like i feel like without that it's just legosi being weird when he has a reason for it!!! This is just one example of the anime taking out crucial narration during the fight.

I also think it's kinda weird how they changed how louis shows up at the fight. im not sure how i feel about riz just charging at him like that, but i liked how legosi kicked him before they ran lol.

i dont have much to say about pina's small scene but I did wanna say that during my first watch thru of the ep i was too distracted trying to read the graffiti behind him that i didn't notice him getting his phone out of the dumpster and calling the cops lmao

it says "devour yahya"

and now... here we are... the predation scene.

overall i thought it was pretty well done but, like the rest of the ep, i could tell it was also being kinda rushed. some important beats werent given enough time to really sink in, and there's a few bits of narration taken out of this part as well that i find disappointing :^(

tho i did like how the anime called back to this scene in s1 when legosi mentions utilizing his strength.

also this part where louis is remembering ibuki had me like😭

I also really liked seeing louis cry. I was crying too sjdflskjdflsjkdf. i thought that scene was really good, its prolly my favorite part of the ep tbh. getting to hear the whole predation scene voiced made me kind of a mess lol. i really liked louis' expressions throughout this whole ep too. studio orange used their whole louis expression budget on these last 2 eps lmao.

seeing legosi instantly get all beefed up was great too. he looked a little ridiculous but i kinda loved it lol. he's so huge and poofy. i love him.

big pomeranian

anyway, im also sad they took out louis' line about being reduced to a flashback character lol. instead he tells legosi "be a hero" again which... im not sure about that change. i liked the part with riz thinking back about tem tho. tho imo the way riz realizes he's in the wrong feels pretty sudden. again adding to how rushed the whole ep feels.

before i move on again i just wanna say legosi looks so cute. even all puffed up and covered in blood. how does he do that

baby boy baby. i wanna ruffle his cheek floofs.

i think one of the things im most disappointed about from this whole ep was how the fight got wrapped up. i really like how the cops show up and totally shift the tone in the manga jslkdfjskljdf. im also really sad we didnt get this interaction

tthe anime really took out most of the sillier moments from the finale, which makes me pretty sad to think about. i know the anime and manga have different tones but pls let the boys be silly sometimes!!

the next part where legosi and louis finally establish their friendship was really cute tho ❤️ even tho it was pretty different i enjoyed it a lot.

BABIESSSS 🥺😭❤️❤️

the wrap-up for this arc and this episode gave me whiplash sdjlfkjsdf. it literally speedruns thru legosi's predation conviction, being released, louis & haru's graduation, and legosi deciding he's going to drop out of school. that is SO MUCH AT ONCE. also i was holding out hope that legosi would have his new years call with haru after the fight instead but that didnt happen!! so it just got cut!!! kinda mad about that tbh. legosi and haru having a lil scene at the very end made up for it a lil bit but that's still one of haru's few moments in this arc that's just not included.

we didnt even get the part wher legosi learns he can't marry haru bc of his conviction.

ive been really hoping for a season 3 announcement once this season ended. with all the background allusions to yahya, the added plot point of someone stealing elephant tusks, and sebun and melon's lil cameos in this season, it seemed to me that studio orange was kinda teasing a 3rd season. but now, with the dismissive way the anime ended, and paru's note from earlier today, im less sure about the possibility of a 3rd season. i'd still like to see the rest of the series animated, but i guess we'll just have to wait and see if more anime is announced in the future.

if we do get another season in the future i just hope that we swing back around and actually address the things that got completely glossed over in the last couple minutes of this episode instead of charging forward w/o touching them again.

i really think the finale for this arc should've been two episodes at least. not including the tunnel scene. i think then things wouldn't have felt so rushed. people have been saying this season really would have benefitted from at least 1 extra episode and i cant help but agree. some have even suggested a whole 24 episodes just for this arc, but i think that this arc couldve been done properly with 12 or 13 episodes if there was some better prioritizing on what to include and what to cut.

like i dont mind not getting the parts about legosi's family if they can be addressed somehow in a future season (or if theres no more future anime seasons thats a plot thread that doesnt have to be worried about). i could have lived w/o seeing sheila & peach's chapter animated if it meant more time for the focus of this arc. and was the kangaroo red herring really necessary?

adaptation wise, i dont think this season was as good as the first. i still think it did fairly well, but i know that it could have been much better. ive been excited to watch this season with my friends once the dub releases, but now im wondering if i should just tell them to read the manga instead. sighs idk. perhaps it comes thru better as a bingewatch, or perhaps im being a bit too harsh. idk. at some point ill do a rewatch and see how i feel about the season as a whole, but that wont be for a while.

if you've read this far, thanks for reading my ramblings!! it's been fun to make these posts every week and im gonna miss getting new episodes every week.

[beloved-child-of-the-house]

Fic Writer Questions! (you can find me here on AO3 if you're interested!)

tagged by dear @theburialofstrawberries mwah!

1) How many works do you have on AO3?

112 yowza!

2) What’s your total AO3 word count?

750,421 kinda tempted to go delete one word so it can be 750420 which is a far more Pleasing number

3) How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

12ish but some of them overlap: BBCS/Sherlock Holmes/ACD (these are all different bc my bbcs fics are not the same as my own modern fem Sherlock Holmes adaptation are not the same as my ACD Holmes fic; Good Omens; Harry Potter/The Werewolf Draco Malfoy Cinematic Universe; Captive Prince; The Hobbit; Fleabag (it was a crossover with BBCS but Fleabag is the perspective character so it still counts as a separate fandom imo); Doctor Who; The Office; Parks and Rec; Broad City (one a piece for those last 5 but I AM going to write a Parks and Rec polycule fic for @gaykagome)

4) What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

They're all Good Omens fics from the 2019 Summer of Good Omens! Susceptible to Summer, Fragments Shored Against My Ruin, Something So Magic, Enter Serpent, and Anything We Like

All of those have over 2k except the last one, but average engagement for me is like 400 kudos or so

5) Do you respond to comments, why or why not?

I try! It depends on what's going on with me. Sometimes I just don't have the energy, and I figure people would rather I spend my brain power on writing new fics than on writing replies to comments. Wish I had a fave button tho so I could let people know I read and reread comments, because I do!

6) What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

Oh I wrote this ficlet series called A Chemical Defect about John and Sherlock's relationship in s3 of BBCS, and it's WILDLY unpopular. People don't read my fic to cry sad tears I guess! John and Sherlock are having an affair in the story, and it ends with the implication that their relationship is unsustainable and that Mary knows about it anyway. I intended to come back to it after s4 and write a more optimistic ending but LOL! Didn't have the heart.

7) What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending?

I know this answer is kinda up my own ass, but like. I think stories that feel true to life sort of feel like they end on a beginning if you know what I mean? You don't really consider a chapter of your life closed until you look back on it from the next? SO that said, I think I'd have to say that it's my big BBCS serial The Only One in the World. I spent 2 years writing it, and it ends with John retiring from medicine to solve crimes and write books full time.

Could also be my WDMCU (werewolf Draco Malfoy cinematic universe) series Moonrise, which starts with Draco isolated in his abusive mother's house, trying to cope with lycanthropy essentially alone and ends with him in love and surrounded by found family in a cozy cottage in Hogsmeade, having gotten some lycanthrope rights legislation passed after working at it for years and talking to Harry about whether they want to have kids. Oh man I feel warm and fuzzy just thinking about it

8) Do you write crossovers? If so what is the craziest one you’ve written?

I have written one crossover. It's BBCS/Fleabag, because me and @loudest-subtext-in-tv were laughing about how John seems like one of the horrible guys Fleabag sleeps with basically out of self loathing, so I wrote this fic to make Nattie laugh, and you should read it bc it's so good and so underrated.

9) Have you ever received hate on a fic?

Not really, but people don't seem to know that authors can read bookmark tags unless you private the bookmark, and someone once put in the bookmark tag on one of my fics 'writing was meh but it was okay.' Okay so why bookmark it then??

10) Do you write smut? If so what kind?

Fuck yes! I'm not sure what 'what kind?' means? People fucking? Sloppy, silly, and awkward, with lots of laughing. I also really like writing afterglow scenes which are even sillier and gigglier and often involve one character cooking for another. Food as love language is a very distinct pattern of mine tbh

11) Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I'm aware of, but occasionally I'll write a post on here where I make some elaborate head canon, and I'll see people in the tags talking about how they want to write fic of it, and it makes me breathe fire out of my nose like a dragon like PLEASE DON'T. The WDMCU came out of a ficlet post I made on here like a year before I actually wrote the 60k series so like!!! Please don't do that!

12) Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes! To Russian and I believe Chinese. Not my entire oeuvre but a handful of BBCS and Good Omens fics

13) Have you ever co-written a fic before?

No, but I wrote a fic inspired by an RP I did with my gf right around when we met (actually now that I think about it, it's two fics), and I waaaaaaanna do a WDMCU collab with my beloved Sally @clytemenestras at some point if he has time bc he inspired me to even write werewolf draco with his original lesbian werewolf story

14) What’s your all time favorite ship?

favorites are hard for me? I always think I'm currently doing my best writing lol so I'll say drarry

15) What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

I don't post fics unless theyre finished, so I don't have any WIP up on AO3, but I did intend to continue with my fem Sherlock Holmes series, Your Many Tendencies. I just haven't been in a Holmes mood for a long time. Maybe I'll come back to it idk. This particular series is honestly very unpopular? People will just straight up say they don't read femslash, and it hurts a lot. This series feels really personal too, bc it's about a Black autistic nonbinary lesbian, so it does hurt my feelings that no one seems to care, yknow? I mean the people who read it are extremely kind and thoughtful in their engagement with it, but it has vastly less engagement than my m/m fic, and that's painful. It gets literally 1/10 the attention my fics usually get.

16) What are your writing strengths?

Almost all of my writing is romance, but I tend to write concurrently about recovery and found family, and I think I'm very good at doing that in a way that connects with my audience. I once had someone ask if they could use my words in their wedding vows, and I've had people tell me they started doing things with their spouse that my characters do with their partners in order to express love. I think about that all the time. My Impact. It makes me feel like I have a real duty to my audience yknow?

17) What are your writing weaknesses?

This question is hard for me like I've been writing so long and so much that I'm literally always happy with my final draft! It's always exactly to my taste, yknow? I suppose I could say that my fics tend not to be terribly plotty but so WHAT? That's beside the fuckn point for me. Plot who? I don't know Her. Also honestly like. Stories feel more True to me when they aren't ruthlessly devoted to plot bc like life isn't like that yknow?

18) What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

If you're not fluent in that language, get a beta who is!!!!! That said, I have written scraps of very simple dialogue in French using mostly Google Translate (sometimes I check w Sally bc he speaks French but I am usually too impatient), and I am perfectly well aware that I take my life in my hands each time!!! Also don't do that bullshit thing where it's in italics? That shit is weird and exoticizing. Just write it in quotation marks like normal dialogue.

19) What was the first fandom you wrote for?

BBCS babey back in 2012. Ended a 5 year dry spell for me after I got my writing degree.

20) What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?

Hmmmm I think it's probably gonna be the fic I'm working on now that I haven't posted yet, but I know it's called Names for a House, and here's a tiny bit of it

Thanks again Shreya for asking me to do this bc I really love talking about myself. I tag @the-moon-loves-the-sea, @clytemenestras, @tomiano, @gaykagome and @totallysilvergirl

No pressure <3

[thai-near]

a lot of rambling thinky-thoughts about writing

i tend to write the dn cast sillier, and this is most noticeable with mello bc he actually tends to be very calm and collected, his movements are calculated, and he knows what he’s doing, he just tends to go for extremes. but bc i typically write silly content, and the way i write romance especially is usually fluffy and very adolescent, mello in my fics comes off as very frenetic, like he has frenetic energy, he’s explosive where it’s out of character for him to be. (what i’m saying is that he should be cooler lol) but it’s not only him. i also do that with near and matt and linda, but i think it’s more pronounced with him.

and i really wanna try like leaning into the darker sides of their personalities, but ofc that would mean writing darker fiction where their silly sides aren’t exaggerated. and it’s not like it’s a problem, per se, that i’ve been writing them like this, but i do feel like, as i’ve delved deeper into making things light-hearted, i’ve lost... integrity? for who the characters are. like. if i weren’t to write their exaggerated versions, would i even be able to write them? it’s like i’ve been adjusting certain aspects of their personalities to fit my needs, and that’s not necessarily a problem, but i think i need to settle down a bit.

i do have fics that are on the more serious side, but they’re like. long. so i haven’t finished any. and i worry that ppl think this is how i see the characters, when that’s not the case, but also at the same time, what does it matter if other ppl think this is how i see them?? all that matters is that i enjoy it so fuck that. anyways. i do want them to be in character tho.

i don’t really know how to fix it. would it be worth it to reread the manga and this time take notes on their actions and mannerisms? like, at the end of the day, fanfic is supposed to be fun. on the other hand, i won’t be satisfied if i don’t do them right. hmmmmmmmmm.

i think the best course of action for me atm is just not to worry about it so much and do my best. i don’t have the time to take thorough notes and write and do school and practice and scholarships and and and and and.

slightly unrelated, but i also wanted to try this thing. like those threadfics on twitter?? but the ones with the polls where readers get to pick like the next line of dialogue or next action and whatnot, and just to keep things organized, i’d want it to be on a separate twitter. my worry is that i won’t execute the stories well, that the characters won’t be well-written, and i’ll disappoint ppl (which is always what it comes back to, right?) i also just. don’t know if anyone’ll be interested. (there’s also the thing like, if i do meronia fics, will dntwt come after me haha) i want to try it tho.

maybe?? i do have another twitter that i used to just write short lines of poetry (read: i just used it to be sad and spill my feelings on, how embarrassing, i can’t believe i have emotions, ugh), and i could refurbish it and make it into a dn fic account instead lmao

would anyone be interested...? hm. let’s try it anyways, and see how it goes.