#maybe something is wrong with me
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Maybe the reason I get so insecure about TINY mistakes in my drawings when everyone says that no one will notice them is because I am the type of person that WILL zoom in and examine a drawing and I probably WOULDVE noticed. I don’t do it to TRY to find mistakes. And even when I do see them I move on but I like looking for little details artists make. Like looking at things and being like “whoever made that KNEW they ate that little piece right there UP” I like seeing EXACTLY how they made the art, seeing sketch lines that weren’t erased is like a treat because I can see their process. But if someone did that to MY art I’d probably cry.
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i have so many regular customers at work and its kinda nice to have nice people that you recognize come by here and there but am i the only one who is uncomfortable going places and having the people working there recognize me?? 💀 like now that its reversed i feel so awkward going to these places bc i feel like there's some weird (likely non-existent) pressure to act a certain way? idk i like not knowing the people behind the counter LOL
#but at the same time i used to go get bubble tea after work a lot and it was nice that the guy there knew me#but now i don't like it anymore when it happens 💀#maybe something is wrong with me#i've had an awkward encounter at this gas station twice now and its driving me nuts i hate awkward encounters
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even when im not sad
Ctto<33
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Oops read a fic where the relationship was written in a way that reminded me of how i yearn to be loved but no one seems to know how to love me
#someone who i used to love dearly (platonically) once told me that people love me the wrong way#that people dont love me how i need to be loved#and they ended up being one of those people#but it haunts me dude#because it made my whole life click into place#and not just romantic relationships i mean like EVERYTHING#shits crazy bro#shout out to the few people who are still around because you figured out how to love me in a way that fits#and by like love me wrong its not just like people not liking me like its a whole spectrum of shit#ranging from not enough to too much to just wrong and everything in between#it's lonely and it sure makes me feel like somethings wrong with me#should i talk about this is therapy this week maybe but i dont have the emotional spoons for that rn#im gonna complain about my arthritis probably#i feel like i should also add i try so hard to make it known how i need to be loved#i try so hard and i learn how people need to be loved#and just idk#maybe something is wrong with me#anyway its 4am#im fine genuinely just kinda sad
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Man this scene in FNAF 2 movie is gonna be wild-
#myart#chloesimagination#comic#fnaf#william afton#steve raglan#shaggy rogers#scooby doo#shaggy and scooby#springtrap#matthew lillard#fnaf movie#fnaf 2#mystery incorporated#fnaf fanart#five nights at freddy's#people think Henry is gonna show up are wrong#it’s gonna be Scooby actually..#Steve Raglan and Shaggy Rogers both start with SR coincidence? maybe…#If yall didn’t know Scooby is some god like being in mystery inc show#so shaggy wanting to become immortal too to stay with his best pal isn’t out of the question-#THIS IS all unserious BUT I HAD to draw something based off these images#I love Scooby doo and fnaf so felt like the perfect crossover ���#it makes me happy the og Scooby puppet is still in good condition
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vent
#i found out today that i don’t feel anything unless it’s like actively bleeding or something#i cut my head open on a cabinet door and didn’t notice until blood dripped down my face#maybe something is wrong with me#i cut my hand and i didn’t feel it#i have hurt myself so much the past few days trying to understand why i can’t feel anything#maybe that’s just where i’m at. numb?#i don’t really eat#so maybe there’s something im missing#but it’s not a good thing#i am getting reckless again
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still ruminating over Lost In the Book With Spooky Skeletons Part 1, so here's a selection of some of my favorite little bits! (...some more loosely paraphrased than others) (I just feel like Idia has no room to criticize in general, okay)
anyway, I'm sure we're just going to have a fun time celebrating Halloween and nothing bad is going to happen whatsoever! :)
#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#lost in the book with nightmare before christmas#hajimari no halloween#calling dibs on skeleton kisses as the name of my band#man scully is just a delightful little weirdo and i'm enjoying him immensely#(i'm going with scully until we get something official just because it makes me think of x-files)#(スカリー is also how the agent's name is transliterated and i don't know if it was intentional but i love it as a bonus reference)#(i want to believe™)#gosh though#'no one at school likes me because i won't shut up about halloween and jack skellington' i'm feeling VERY attacked right now twst#look scully your people are out there#just get on the forums and -- oh wait you're probably from like the 1800s or something#(my theory is that he's from the past and there's just some Book Magic going on to bring us together)#(LOOK they made a point of saying that the book fair has been held annually for a super long time)#a hot topic goth born before hot topic was invented...so sad 😔#i dunno i could be wrong but that feels like a good working theory for now#if it wasn't for mal sensing twsty ~magic~ on him i would think he's like. a christmas elf who's going to kidnap jack in a reverse-nmbc#(not ruling that out though because it would be amazing)#god all the sprites in this event look AMAZING. loving the desaturated colors and the extra drawn-on lines 😍#i'm genuinely kinda sad that we aren't gonna get to see every character like this#who knows...maybe halloweentown will be imperiled again next year...#come back and destroy my keys again please#(that said i'm doing weirdly well so far?)#(i promised i'd save for sebek and just do cursory pulls to get the SRs and not hope for the SSRs)#(...but then leona jumpscared me four coffins in anyway. halloween magic is REAL)
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the worst feeling is looking in the mirror and not recognizing yourself whatsoever
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looking into my head made my therapist cry last session why is she so dramatic like chill sis its not that srs I literally live in here
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On autonomy, and what it means to be Obliged to Help.
Bonus:
#a homestuck walks into an antechamber and asks#hey is anybody going to make this dynamic wholly deterministic and thus dubiously consensual by its very nature#ANYWAY bigger ramble below. scroll down like usual#isat spoilers#isat#isat fanart#isat siffrin#isat loop#sifloop#THATS RIGHT WE'RE STILL SHIP TAGGING IT BABYYYY#in stars and time#in stars and time fanart#lucabyteart#RAMBLE START: anyway i think loop is wrong here. they have it backwards. as-- in my opinion--#the main reason they could be called back into existence postcanon is because *their* wish for help is still not complete#they still need help. siffrin still needs help. neither of them will ever stop needing help.#they will thus uphold the wish until the end of siffrin's natural lifespan.#that said. what does it mean that loop can be so wholly forced to abide by siffrin's wants?#(assuming the dagger cutscene posession is them being forced to uphold the 'help siffrin' wish via harsh universe logic)#[as opposed to something capricious and cruel the change god did. which feels out of character for the change god to me?]#much like how the island wish and duplicate objects are neutered by simply sliding off people's brains...#is loop subtly ushered toward their wish? obviously it's not a full override (see: the bossfight). but is there any interference?#and if so. so what? does it matter? if they don't notice? is it even real if they don't notice?#and even if they do notice. the universe leads we follow. how much do either of them value their free will in a belief system like that?#the whole game is dedicated to siffrin habitually NOT excersizing his free will. doing things the same Every Time.#Loop ESPECIALLY does this. predetermined predetermined predetermined even in the FACE OF CHANGE. REFUSING. ANY CHOICE.#Maybe they'd even be comforted by having a universe-ordained purpose even if it is subservient. even if its to Him.#(though. i can't see siffrin enjoying the idea that someone is subservient TO them... then all their suffering is his fault...)#loop got into this mess via WANTING too much. no more free will. can't be trusted with it. take it away from them.#but yeah. gets my greasy detective pony hands all over this. and everyone please do remember i like to make characters Outright Wrong A Lot
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I’m not really attracted to anyone but if you like me I’m already in love with you whoever you are.
#I don’t feel any attraction to anyone#for a long time I thought something was wrong with me#until someone said they liked me#I then started to get excited when around them#i don’t think much about who I want to be in a relationship with#but if you want to start talking I start thinking of our wedding#maybe something is wrong with me
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man i love flowey so much, i don’t think i ever realized just how funny he is when i was a teenager. i love that he save scums. i love that he gets mad when you interrupt his monologue. i love that he talks like an anime villain because he thinks frisk is chara and is playing the world’s longest game of edgy oc playground roleplaying. he has the strongest cain instinct i have ever seen. he projects like crazy. he is an incredibly sore loser. i love him
#don’t get me wrong he is also very tragic and a deeply traumatized child put in a weird undeath situation#experiencing immense grief and his body is now something that is entirely a reminder of that grief#he is a fascinating character. but also he’s funny.#i love when asriel says ‘’maybe i was projecting a little bit’’#like. yeah. just a little
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I swapped them around in a silly doodle
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#Vasco! what have they done to you?!#he finally caught the skrunklies#it's contagious#or maybe there's something horribly wrong with the ambient pressure and he's not agreeing with it at all#it's jarring that (at least to me) both Machetes read as Machete they're the opposite ends of the Machete spectrum#his form oscillates between an exposed nerve and a unicorn I get it#but swapped Vasco is#a whole new mystery critter#actually he's kind of cute#I would take him home#give him a bath in the sink and feed him some grilled chicken maybe that'll make him feel more like himself#real Vasco is toasted to perfection this one looks burnt at the edges and raw in the middle#I love his little off-model sheep ear#couldn't even keep his glorious floppers poor boy#gift art#foilthepiglin#own characters#Machete#Vasco
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little detail I've picked up on: lucanis seems to like it when rook is smart. not in an academically minded way, necessarily, but when they're clever/analytical and clear-eyed about the practical realities of a matter and able to sort out the bullshit. most immediate example that comes to mind is of course when rook points out to illario that zara physically can't have made it back to vyrantium yet by conventional means in the café scene (where they're also backing what lucanis is trying to say, so the approval there makes extra sense), but it pops up in several other places too where rook cuts through to the heart of a problem with that kind of thinking. his and davrin's approval often overlap, but davrin seems to like it when rook is resolute and practical (and kind but don't tell anyone that sssh <3 ilu davrin), where I get the sense that lucanis gets that extra little thrill when they're also clever. in another contrast emmrich likes it when you're curious and openminded and kind (a lot like solas in da:i really) -- more like a life-long earnest academic *would* think about and value learning and knowledge in terms of a process and way of thinking rather than the results that come out of it -- while i think lucanis kind of likes it (and possibly gets a little ah frisson out of it depending on your relationship with him lol) when your mind is a knife. which I think is really neat. also tracks perfectly with him liking both viago and neve too haha. he clearly enjoys the Thinkers of the world.
#lucanis whenever rye's stark sharp analytical Watcher eyes break through the just a little guy-ness: ah too late#something has already been Awakened in me there's no turning back now. oh well :> ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️#dragon age#dragon age: the veilguard#dragon age: the veilguard spoilers#dragon age spoilers#lucanis dellamorte#oc: Ellaryen Ingellvar#rook x lucanis#rookanis#you know what I actually really like in this game that is such a little thing? rook can reach the wrong conclusions in dialogue#really quite frequently. another lucanis quest example but you can have your rook reach the conclusion that maybe zara is lying#even though all available evidence is sort of building up under what she says. rook is allowed to be wrong and/or just not wired that way!#they have a whole team behind them to make up for the places they may fall short (whether in people skills or critical thinking or whatever#small flavours in characterization that does a lot if you actually engage with them
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I've seen a lot of different takes on Fear Toxin/other fear causing stuff (Yellow Lanterns Ring or something)(later just called Fear Toxin cause I'm lazy) but here is another one.
Danny seems like he isn't affected by Fear Toxin because his biggest fear is that his accident changed him so much he is no longer human, he can no longer truly experience human things.
So when he gets lungful of fear Toxin, he feels normal. He was antsy before, because c'mon, it's a rogue attack but it's not worse. Or so he thought. Because the anxiety lingers. Not enough to register as abnormal just this slight hypervigilance that makes you see things about yourself and your surroundings that you'd never realize otherwise. He'd realize he doesn't blink as often. He'd realize that if he doesn't consciously focus, he sometimes seems to not touch the ground. Forgets to breathe. He can't feel his own pulse at time. He'd realize people will miss him when he's walking down the street as if he was invisible (people just don't care about everyone they pass by). When he'd look straight into his reflection, he'd look slightly to the left. Not enough to actually name anything that was wrong but just stretched enough to fall on the wrong side of the uncanny valley. If he just caught his reflection in the peripheral vision, it'd be vaguely shadowy creature with glowing green eyes and white smoke instead of hair. Overall he'd be just wrong enough to be distinctly not human.
For everyone else, he'd be just a dude. Literally couldn't find more normal dude than this dude. Will pass as absolutely normal human unless someone is specifically looking for ecto-ghost stuff. Even most magic users wouldn't clock him at the glance
Tldr: Fear Toxin makes Danny perceive himself as some sort of eldritch horror but not enough to make him believe he'd actually be affected, while from outside perspective he's Just A Dude™
#dpxdc#dc x dp#dp x dc#dcxdp#fear toxin#please no Ghost King#nothing against this au but i don't think it'll mesh well woth this idea#probably works best with danny soon after accident#maybe still believing all of his parents anti-ghost propaganda#that'd add to angst for sure#idk why he is somewhere where he could be affected#idk who would realize something is wrong#up to whoever wants to do expand on this prompt#he'd cry when someone tells him he's been in fact affected by fear causing thing#because this means he *is* human and while he was fundamentally changed by his death#it didn't fully get rid of his humanity#but he won't tell that too busy being relieved so whoever delivered the news would be in for the ride#actually it'd be cool if it was someone who has superpowers but they showed up later in their life#parallels y'know#... i may still not be normal about “i wonder what could lie beyond infinity” by Numinous_Scribe on ao3...#top notch fic go read it great Clark characterization#anyway because plot kinda escaped me#hope this idea scratches someone's creative braincell or something#im curious what y'all will make out of it#yellow lantern#have a nice day dear stranger who got to this part
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