#maybe someday i'll try to make it more like i was seeing it but i really dig the surrealism | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

mononijikayu · 3 months ago

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i have love and dreams too — gojo satoru.

Yuji looked down at his hands, feeling a strange sense of guilt. “Do you really think… you can never have that life you want?” Satoru didn’t answer right away. Instead, he closed his eyes, letting the wind ruffle his silver hair. For a moment, he was just Satoru—not the strongest, not the invincible sorcerer, but a man burdened by the life he had to lead. “I don’t know, Yuji……” he said quietly, almost to himself. “But I like to dream that maybe, someday… we could all disappear. And live. Just live. Just me, my wife, Megumi, Tsumiki, Satoshi… away from everything. Living in peace.”

WARNING/S: spoilers for chapter 271 of jjk (spoilers at your behest), domesticity, fluff, angst, trauma, implied death, violence, romance, hurt/comfort, character death depiction of death, depictions of loss and depression, depiction of blood, depiction of killing, depiction of suffering, depiction of anxiety, mention of death, mention of grief, profanity, family drama;

WORDS: 6.8k words.

NOTE: i rush wrote this at uni, at the restaurant i was at and then a car on the way back and forth from uni and home. i just started crying profusely because i hated how jjk ended. and i hated that panel with satoru and yuji because i just kept crying. i cant believe this is the end, but i cant believe even more that this is what satoru had to deal with. this is the most rushed end and the saddest end.

i wish gege had decided to take a break and decided to take his time. but alas this is not my story. still, id like to make more for satoru. ones where he'd be so loved. genmei (you) and satoru will always be happy in whatever life you have, that i write. for bitter or for worse. even in death. smiling is all there will be. even with tears.

anyway, i hope you bear with me, for i am very emotional. thank you for understanding this situation. i love you all, i'll see you soon <3

masterlist

u s and t h e m

if you want to, tip! <3

GOJO SATORU IS EXHAUSTED. But he thinks that there is no use to sleep. He knows he cannot. The room was bathed in the soft glow of a single lamp, the light too dim to chase away the shadows that lingered in every corner, just like the uncertainty that hung between you and Satoru.

He sat across from you on the edge of the bed, his usual carefree demeanor gone, replaced by a solemn stillness that felt out of place on him. His eyes, usually so vibrant and mischievous, were tired tonight, the weight of tomorrow pulling down his every breath.

"You don’t have to do this." Your voice came out in a whisper, the words heavy with a desperation you’d been trying to suppress.

Satoru didn’t answer right away. His gaze was locked on the floor, and for a moment, you wondered if he was even listening. But then he looked up, his piercing blue eyes meeting yours, and there was something in them you rarely saw—fear.

"It’s not like I have a choice," he murmured, his voice strained. "You know that."

You did. And that made it worse. He was the strongest, after all. If anyone had to stand against Sukuna, it was him. But the weight of those expectations had never felt heavier than it did now, with the reality of the fight looming closer with every passing second.

"I hate this, Satoru." you confessed, your voice trembling. "I hate that it always comes down to you, that you’re the one who has to bear this."

Satoru smiled, but it didn’t reach his eyes. He stood and crossed the small space between you, kneeling in front of you, his hands gently resting on your knees. His touch was warm, grounding, but it did nothing to quell the storm raging inside you.

"Hey." he said softly, lifting your chin so you’d look at him. "I know it’s not fair. But it’s what I have to do."

You shook your head, biting back the tears that threatened to spill. "But what if—" The words caught in your throat, the question too painful to finish.

Satoru’s thumb brushed against your cheek, wiping away a tear you didn’t even realize had fallen. "Don’t think about that," he whispered, his voice as soft as the night air outside. "Not tonight."

"But how can I not?" you shot back, your frustration breaking through. "How can I pretend that everything will be fine when I know you’re going to face him? When I know there’s a chance that—"

He silenced you with a kiss, his lips gentle but firm, grounding you in the present, in this moment. When he pulled back, his forehead rested against yours, and you could feel the warmth of his breath against your skin.

"I’ll come back to you," he promised, but even he couldn’t hide the uncertainty in his voice. “To you and Satoshi. And… I’ll bring Megumi and Tsumiki back. We’ll be a family again, like we used to be.”

It was the way he said it—so sure, so certain—that made it all the more unbearable. As if speaking it aloud would somehow make it true, would make the universe bend to his will the same way he bent the forces of space and time. But you knew better now, didn’t you? You’ve always known. Satoru Gojo, the man who was too powerful to fail, too stubborn to admit defeat, could never stop lying—not to you, not to himself. He believed in his own invincibility, as if his strength alone could rewrite the world.

But the world doesn’t work that way.

And you think then, that your husband has always been a liar.

You’ve lost count of how many times you’ve heard those words, promises wrapped in silk and carelessness, the way they tumbled off his tongue so casually. It was as though the act of saying it was enough for him, as though the truth could be commanded with just his voice. And maybe for a long time, it was.

Satoru Gojo, the strongest sorcerer, the man who could bend the world to his whims and yet still—he was human. And humans lie. Sometimes because they have to, sometimes because the lie feels better than the truth.

But tonight, in the quiet hours before dawn, the weight of his words pressed down harder than ever. We’ll be a family again, like we used to be. You wanted to scream at him, to shake him, to make him stop speaking as if the world was something he could fix with his bare hands. Megumi was gone, taken by darkness, by fate, and Tsumiki…Tsumiki was as good as lost to you both. Even if Satoru came back, even if he somehow survived this fight with Sukuna, the cracks in your family couldn’t simply be patched over like they had never existed.

You bit your lip, tasting the bitterness of unshed tears.

"You always say that," you whispered, your voice barely audible over the soft hum of the night. "But you don’t know this time, do you?"

His gaze faltered, the usual gleam in his eyes dimming for a fraction of a second. It was a flicker of something too vulnerable, too raw—something he rarely let anyone see. It was the truth that lingered behind his endless bravado, the truth that no amount of strength could hide: he didn’t know if he could win this time.

And you had known it all along.

Satoru had always come back to you. Bruised, battered, bleeding—but alive. He would stumble through the door with that infuriating grin, wipe the blood off his face with the back of his hand, and act like nothing had ever been in doubt. But this time was different. This wasn’t just another battle against curses or enemies who fell beneath his overwhelming strength. This was Sukuna.

"I’ll bring Megumi and Tsumiki back," he had said, as if they were just lost children in the woods, waiting for him to lead them home. But Megumi had slipped beyond reach, swallowed by the very darkness Satoru had spent his life fighting. How could he promise to bring him back when he could barely keep the pieces of himself together?

"You can’t save everyone, Satoru," you whispered, your heart breaking as you said it aloud, the truth as bitter as the lie was sweet. "Not even with all your power."

His hand tightened around yours, his grip almost too strong, as if holding onto you could somehow anchor him to the world, to the promise he so desperately wanted to believe. "I have to try," he murmured, his voice rough, as if the words themselves were painful to speak. "For you. For Satoshi. For them."

Satoshi. Your son. His name hung in the air like a thread between you, a fragile tether that held what little remained of your family together. You could see it in Satoru’s eyes—the fear of leaving his child without a father, the guilt of not being able to protect him from the storm that loomed over your lives. But you also saw the lie there, the same lie he told every time he went to war. The lie that he would come back unscathed, that he could shield all of you from the world’s cruelty just by being who he was.

But he couldn’t. Not this time.

"Satoru," you whispered, your voice breaking. "You don’t have to be everything for us. You don’t have to be invincible."

His eyes softened, and for a moment, just a moment, the mask slipped. He let you see the man beneath the legend, the man who was just as terrified as you were. "I’m not invincible," he admitted, the words barely audible. "But I can’t give up on them. I can’t give up on us."

You didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. Even in his most vulnerable moments, even when the odds were impossibly stacked against him, Satoru Gojo refused to let go of hope. He clung to it as fiercely as he clung to you, because to do anything less would mean admitting that maybe—just maybe—he wasn’t strong enough.

And in that moment, you realized something: it wasn’t that your husband was a liar. It was that he couldn’t afford to tell the truth, because if he did, the weight of it might break him.

So, you let him hold onto his lie, let him believe in a future where you, Satoshi, Megumi, and Tsumiki could all be together again. Maybe it was kinder that way. For both of you.

As the night stretched on and the inevitable dawn crept closer, you pressed your face against his chest, listening to the steady rhythm of his heartbeat. For now, that was all you had—the warmth of him beside you, the sound of his heart still beating, the fragile hope that somehow, against all odds, he would come back to you.

And maybe, just maybe, the lie would come true.

“I always have, don’t I?” he added, a faint smirk pulling at the corner of his lips, that signature bravado surfacing in an attempt to reassure you. “I’ve always won the day. I’ll come back.”

Your husband’s bright eyes—those crystalline blue eyes that had seen so much, fought through so much—they betrayed him. Beneath that unwavering confidence, there was something else. Fear? Doubt? It was a crack in the façade of the invincible man you married, a truth too terrifying to speak aloud.

Your throat tightened as you met his gaze, the silence between you heavier than any words could be. He had always come back, hadn’t he? Through every impossible battle, every mission that should have left him broken or worse, he had somehow returned to you, grinning as if the world itself were a game only he knew how to win.

But that wasn’t the whole truth. The nights he returned bruised, bleeding, barely standing, those nights played in your mind like a broken record. He made light of it all, brushing off your worries with a laugh, a kiss, a flippant “I’m fine.” But those were lies too, weren’t they? Lies wrapped in love.

“Satoru,” you breathed, your voice unsteady, “you don’t have to say it.”

His smirk faltered, just for a second, and that brief flicker of vulnerability nearly undid you. He pulled you closer, his hand cradling the back of your neck, his touch tender but laced with desperation. "But I will come back," he insisted, his voice soft but firm. "I always do."

You wanted to believe him. You needed to. Because to imagine a world where he didn’t come back, where that promise wasn’t fulfilled, was a world too cruel to fathom. But tonight, as the shadow of Sukuna loomed larger than ever, the weight of that lie pressed down on you both. What if this time, his strength wasn’t enough?

“What if…” you started, but he silenced you with a finger pressed gently against your lips.

“No ‘what ifs,’” he whispered, though you both knew better than that. Satoru had lived his life defying fate, bending it to his will. But not even the strongest sorcerer could escape death forever.

His hand moved from your neck to cup your cheek, his thumb tracing the curve of your face as if trying to memorize it, as if this moment might be his last chance. You could see the weight of the world in his eyes, the burden of being the one everyone relied on, the one expected to face the impossible—and win.

But for once, he wasn’t invincible to you. He was just a man, your husband, and for the first time, you saw the lie for what it was: his way of protecting you. Of protecting himself from the truth that this might be the one fight he couldn’t walk away from.

You placed your hand over his, feeling the warmth of his skin, and in that moment, you didn’t care about lies or truths, about promises or fears. You just wanted him here, now, with you. "Then stay with me a little longer," you whispered, your voice breaking.

Satoru closed his eyes, exhaling deeply, and nodded. "I’m here," he said, pulling you into his arms, his voice a soft, almost broken promise. "I’m here."

And for tonight, that would have to be enough.

The two of you stayed like that for what felt like an eternity, neither speaking, just holding onto each other as if by doing so, you could freeze time, stop the inevitable from coming. You memorized the feel of his hands on your skin, the warmth of his body against yours, the sound of his heartbeat under your palm. You clung to the moment as if it were your last.

As the night wore on, you both lay down, tangled in each other’s arms. Sleep didn’t come easily, and when it did, it was fitful, haunted by the looming specter of tomorrow. You held onto him tightly, afraid that if you let go, he would disappear into the darkness, never to return.

In the early hours before dawn, Satoru stirred, his arms tightening around you one last time. The weight of the night clung to both of you, thick and heavy, the silence between his breaths and your heart beats a fragile barrier against the coming storm.

You felt him shift beside you, his warmth pulling you closer, as if holding you tighter could keep the inevitable at bay for just a moment longer. His fingers traced gentle circles on your back, his touch familiar, grounding, but laced with an unspoken tension.

"I’ll be back, hm?" he whispered again, the words soft and lingering in the stillness. His voice, usually so sure, faltered at the edges, as though he was trying to convince himself as much as he was trying to comfort you.

He said it like a prayer, like repeating it enough times could bend fate, twist reality to make it true. But you knew better. You both did. Those words, though meant to soothe, carried the weight of all the times you’d heard them before, and the growing fear that this time might be different.

You didn’t respond. You couldn’t. The knot in your throat tightened, a lump of unspoken fears and uncried tears. There was too much to say, too much that couldn’t be put into words without breaking whatever fragile hope remained between you. If you spoke now, you might lose whatever composure you had left, and you needed to hold on to it, if only for his sake.

Instead, you pressed your face against his chest, your ear resting just above his heart. The steady, rhythmic beating echoed through your body, its cadence familiar and reassuring, a sound that had become synonymous with home.

It was the same heartbeat you’d fallen asleep to countless nights, the one you’d clung to after long missions, when he’d returned battered but smiling, and you’d held him just like this—like he was your anchor to the world.

But this time, it was different. You weren’t just seeking comfort; you were memorizing it. The sound, the feel of his chest rising and falling beneath your cheek, the warmth of his skin against yours. You were committing it all to memory, engraving it deep into your soul because, somewhere in the back of your mind, a quiet voice whispered that this might be the last time.

Each beat of his heart became a marker, a reminder of the moments you had shared, of all the laughter and love and quiet nights like this one. But now, it also carried the weight of what could be lost. The inevitability of tomorrow pressed against your chest, suffocating, as if time itself was slipping through your fingers.

You tighten your grip around him, your fingers curling into the fabric of his shirt, unwilling to let go, even as the sky outside began to lighten with the first traces of dawn. The sun was rising, and with it, the time for him to leave drew nearer.

Satoru’s hand moved to your hair, his fingers threading through it gently, soothingly. He kissed the top of your head, and though his touch was as tender as ever, there was a lingering sadness in it. He held you like he was trying to memorize you, too, like this was as much for him as it was for you. He didn’t say anything more, perhaps because he knew that no words would ease the ache that had settled between you, a chasm neither of you could cross.

As the first rays of sunlight filtered through the window, casting a soft, golden glow over the room, you felt him shift again, his breath hitching slightly as he prepared to rise. You wanted to beg him to stay, to forget about everything else, just for today. But you knew he couldn’t, and you wouldn’t ask that of him. He had a duty, a burden that he had carried for as long as you had known him. And no matter how much you wanted to keep him safe, you couldn’t shield him from what was coming.

When he finally moved to leave, your arms loosened around him, but you couldn’t bring yourself to let go completely. Not yet. He leaned down, pressing a kiss to your forehead, lingering there for a moment longer than he needed to, as if he, too, was trying to hold on to this last fragment of peace before it was shattered.

“I’ll be back.” he whispered once more, his breath warm against your skin.

This time, you didn’t respond because you couldn’t. Instead, you closed your eyes, letting the sound of his heartbeat linger in your memory, holding onto it as tightly as you held onto him. The door would close behind him soon, and with it, he would walk into the fight of his life, a battle that you both knew could be his last. But for now, in this fleeting moment before dawn, you let yourself believe in the lie, because the truth was too painful to bear.

And when he finally left, the door closing softly behind him, you were left alone in the silence, the echo of his promise lingering in the air, fragile and fleeting.

HE DOESN’T KNOW WHY, BUT HE JUST FELT LIKE TALKING. Quite unlike him, if he was being honest with himself. But as Gojo Satoru sat beside Itadori Yuji, all he could think about was peace of mind. And to do that, he thinks he should talk.

Gojo Satoru could feel his usual smirk playing at the corners of his mouth, though today it felt more subdued. They had been talking for a while now, their conversation meandering from one thing to another. But beneath Satoru’s lighthearted tone, Yuji sensed something deeper. Something weighed heavy on his teacher’s mind.

“When something happens, I want you to be there for me, Yuji.” Satoru said suddenly, his eyes staring ahead. His voice was soft, but not weak—it carried the strength of someone who had lived with the knowledge that he had to bear the world on his shoulders. “I have love and dreams too, you know.”

Yuji blinked, surprised by the vulnerability in Satoru’s words. He wasn’t used to hearing his sensei talk like this, with a depth that seemed so different from his usual carefree attitude.

Satoru glanced at Yuji, his smile widening slightly, though it didn’t quite reach his eyes. “But you know, one day, everyone will grow up and leave me behind, right?”

Yuji didn’t know how to respond. The idea of leaving Satoru behind felt impossible. But Satoru’s words hung in the air, heavy with the weight of his loneliness. It was a rare glimpse into the mind of the man everyone thought was invincible.

“I have high hopes for you.” Satoru continued, his voice becoming more playful, but there was something fragile beneath the surface. “Desire and ambition!”

“I could never forget you.” Yuji said as he smiled nervously, trying to deflect the seriousness with humor, though it didn’t quite land.

Satoru sighed. “I honestly think it’s better to have someone stronger than me who can truly forget my existence.”

“Isn’t that a bit concerning, Sensei?” Yuji asked after a moment, tilting his head. “Are you okay with that?”

Satoru’s smile softened. “Ah, you’re so young and naïve!” he said fondly, his voice carrying an almost paternal tone. “You’re brimming with confidence, aren’t you?”

The conversation lulled, and for a moment, the two sat in silence, the air between them thick with unsaid things. And then, Satoru spoke again, but this time his voice was lower, as if he were confessing something he hadn’t shared with anyone else.

“You know, Yuji…..” Satoru began, his gaze distant. The most emotional Yuji had seen him to be. “Sometimes I wish I could just… run away. With my beloved. My wife. Megumi, Tsumiki, and little Satoshi too. I dream about it sometimes. Hiding us away somewhere no one could find us. No more battles, no more curses… just peace. We’d be a family again.”

Yuji looked at his sensei Gojo, stunned. He had never heard his teacher speak like this before, as though the weight of being the strongest had finally worn him down. Gojo Satoru’s dream of escaping, of living a quiet life with the people he loved—it was so human.

So far removed from the man everyone saw as untouchable, undefeatable. But at this moment, Satoru wasn’t the strongest sorcerer in the world. He was just a man who wanted to protect the people he loved. A man who longed for something simple, something real.

“That’s my dream, my love and dreams.” Satoru whispered, his voice barely audible. “But I know it’s impossible. The world needs me too much.”

Yuji’s heart ached for him. He didn’t know what to say, so instead, he simply sat there, hoping that in his silence, his sensei could feel his support.

Satoru sighed, standing up and stretching as if to shake off the heaviness of their conversation. “Anyway, enough of that.” he said, flashing his usual grin. “Let’s focus on what’s in front of us.”

But even as he spoke, Yuji couldn’t shake the feeling that, deep down, Satoru Gojo longed for something far beyond his reach.

Yuji stared at Satoru, processing the weight of his sensei's words. It was hard to imagine Satoru Gojo, the invincible sorcerer who seemed so carefree, harboring such a vulnerable wish. A man who could crush enemies with ease, someone who always had the answers—yet, here he was, confessing a dream that would never come true.

“I never thought… you’d want something like that, Sensei.” Yuji admitted quietly, his voice breaking the silence. “I guess I never really thought about what you’d want outside of all this.”

Satoru glanced at him, a softer smile playing on his lips. “That’s the thing, isn’t it? When you’re as strong as I am, no one really thinks to ask what you want. They think you don’t need anything… or anyone.”

Yuji frowned, guilt washing over him. He hadn’t meant to think that way about Gojo Satoru, but it was true. He had always seen his teacher as larger than life, almost beyond human in his ability to control any situation, to be everywhere and nowhere at once.

"But... you have them, Sensei." Yuji said slowly, searching for the right words. "Your wife, Megumi, Tsumiki, and Satoshi… They need you, don't they? Maybe you can’t run away, but you still have something, sensei. A family. Isn't that enough?”

Satoru chuckled, but the sound was hollow, lacking its usual energy. He sat back down beside Yuji, his gaze once again distant. “You’d think that, right? But the stronger you are, the more people take from you. It’s like… I’m always on borrowed time. I’m always one fight away from leaving them behind too.”

Yuji swallowed hard. He’d never thought about Satoru’s life in that way. It was a sobering realization, that even someone as powerful as Gojo was constantly battling not just external threats but the fear of losing what little he had.

“I wish I could protect them from everything.” Satoru murmured. “Just take them somewhere far away… no more battles, no more cursed energy. Just… quiet. But no matter how strong I am, I can’t do that. I can’t just… leave the world to burn while we live in peace.”

He turned to Yuji then, his icy blue eyes piercing through the air. “You know, sometimes I think I was selfish for bringing them into my world. Megumi, Tsumiki, Satoshi… my wife. They didn’t ask for this. I chose this life for them.”

“Sensei.” Yuji started, unsure of what to say. His heart ached for Satoru. “They love you. And… they wouldn’t want to live without you, either. Even if it’s dangerous.”

Satoru’s lips twitched upward in a bittersweet smile. “Yeah, I know. But love’s a tricky thing, Yuji. It’s not enough to stop the world from trying to tear us apart. It never has been.”

Yuji nodded, not fully understanding, but feeling the gravity of Satoru’s words. There was a silence between them, but it was heavy with the weight of shared thoughts, of unspoken dreams and impossible futures.

Satoru leaned back, his hands resting behind his head. “But hey, that’s just how it goes, right? No point in dwelling on things we can’t change.”

He looked at Yuji with a bright grin, but it felt like a mask—one Yuji was starting to see through more and more. “So, enough about me. What about you? What are your dreams, Yuji?”

Yuji blinked, surprised by the sudden shift. “My dreams?”

Satoru nodded. “Yeah. You must have some. Or did you think I was the only one allowed to have them?”

Yuji scratched the back of his neck, thinking for a moment. “I guess… I don’t know. I never really thought that far ahead. I’ve been so focused on everything happening now, I never gave myself the chance.”

Satoru chuckled softly. “That’s the thing with us, sorcerers. We get so caught up in fighting for today, we forget to dream about tomorrow.”

Yuji looked down at his hands, feeling a strange sense of guilt. “Do you really think… you can never have that life you want?”

Satoru didn’t answer right away. Instead, he closed his eyes, letting the wind ruffle his silver hair. For a moment, he was just Satoru—not the strongest, not the invincible sorcerer, but a man burdened by the life he had to lead.

“I don’t know, Yuji……” he said quietly, almost to himself. “But I like to dream that maybe, someday… we could all disappear. And live. Just live. Just me, my wife, Megumi, Tsumiki, Satoshi… away from everything. Living in peace.”

His voice trailed off, and Yuji could hear the longing in it. The truth was, Satoru Gojo might be the strongest sorcerer alive, but even he was bound by the same rules as everyone else. He couldn’t run from the world, couldn’t hide from the battles he had to fight.

But it didn’t stop him from dreaming.

Yuji looked at him with a new understanding, realizing that no matter how strong someone was, they still carried their own struggles, their own wishes and dreams. And sometimes, those dreams were just as fragile as anyone else's.

"Maybe one day, sensei." Yuji said softly, with an honest smile. "You won't have to fight anymore."

Satoru chuckled, opening one eye to glance at Yuji. "Maybe. But until then, we keep going."

And with that, the conversation ended, but the weight of it lingered between them—a reminder that even the strongest had dreams they longed to chase, even if those dreams were just out of reach.

YOU THINK YOU WAITED FOR THIS MOMENT FOR A LONG TIME. When you wait for your eyes to close with finality, the weight of the years presses down on you, a quiet fatigue settling into your bones. You’re tired—so tired—and when you open them again, you're met with the familiar sight of Fushiguro Megumi and Gojo Satoshi. Your two sons, waiting for you to go and leave them.

Megumi stands tall, his arms crossed as usual, but his gaze softens when he sees you. Satoshi, ever his opposite, smiles that wide, carefree grin of his. They both look at you, concern etched into their features.

"I'm exhausted." you tell them softly, the words slipping out like a confession you’ve been holding in for far too long.

“You can’t die yet, Mother......" Satoshi pipes up, his voice steady, but the cracks of fear were unmistakable. His usual bright demeanor falters, his hands trembling ever so slightly as he grips the hem of his shirt. His voice may be steady, but his eyes betray him—glossed with unshed tears, reflecting a grief he’s not ready to face. Not now. Not yet.

“You’re still too young!” There’s urgency in his words, a childlike plea echoing in his tone, though he’s long since grown past childhood. The way his shoulders hunch forward, the way his gaze darts between you and Megumi—he’s holding on. Clutching to hope as if his words could anchor you to this world a little longer.

Megumi stands beside him, more composed, but his silence carries a weight just as heavy. He nods, his expression solemn. “He’s right, Gen-san.” Megumi adds quietly.

His voice is low, restrained, as though he’s struggling to hold back everything he truly wants to say. His hands remain tucked in his pockets, his face as unreadable as ever, but his eyes—the eyes you’ve known for so many years—hold a flicker of something deeper. Desperation? Fear? Perhaps both.

"You’re only 48. You still have time left."

His words are careful, deliberate, each one carrying the weight of someone who’s had to shoulder too much responsibility, too much loss. The faint tremor in his voice betrays how much he’s already bracing himself for another wound, another absence he’ll have to carry.

You look at them both—Satoshi, who still clings to hope as though it could somehow rewrite fate, and Megumi, whose quiet strength has always shielded him from the full brunt of the pain—but not this time. They both stand there, torn between urging you to stay and accepting the inevitable.

But you smile at them, a soft, knowing smile that carries the weight of the years, the joy and the sorrow, the love and the loss. It's a smile that’s lived through the ache of life without Satoru, a smile that remembers every laugh, every argument, every stolen glance, and every moment that felt too brief.

“I know, I know......” you say, your voice gentle, steady. There’s a peace in your tone that they don’t yet understand, a quiet acceptance that fills the space between you. “But I’m ready. I’ve missed Satoru... for so long.”

And in that moment, as you say his name, the air feels lighter, as if the years of separation, the longing, the silent ache in your chest begins to unravel. You missed him—not just in fleeting moments or in passing thoughts, but in the depths of your soul. Every day, every night. The space he left behind has been a constant companion, a reminder of what once was and what could never be again.

The tears in Satoshi’s eyes finally spill over, and Megumi’s lips press into a thin line, his jaw tightening, but neither of them say anything. They understand, even if they don’t want to.

Because love—true, enduring love—is something that even death can’t diminish. And they know you loved Satoru with all that you were, and perhaps, even now, they understand that your heart has been waiting for him all along.

The weight in your chest lightens as you speak his name. Megumi frowns but doesn't say anything more, and Satoshi’s smile falters, understanding settling into their eyes.

You close your eyes once again, the world fading into a peaceful darkness. There's a brief moment of silence, a quiet passing, before a familiar voice echoes softly, teasingly:

“Did you miss me?”

Tears well up before you even open your eyes. You don’t need to see him to know it’s him. The voice, that unmistakable voice—playful, laced with all the love and mischief you’d missed for too long.

When your eyes flutter open, there he is—Satoru, standing before you, that brilliant smile lighting up his face. The tears fall freely now, but for the first time in years, they're not from

“Satoru......” you breathe, his name barely a whisper on your lips, as though speaking it aloud might break the fragile moment. Your voice catches in your throat, a mix of disbelief, relief, and the sorrow that’s lived inside you for far too long.

It’s a name you’ve spoken to the silence of empty rooms, whispered into the night when no one was there to hear, a name tied to a thousand memories you’ve held onto so tightly for all these years.

The tears that have welled up in your eyes begin to spill over, blurring the figure before you, but you don’t need to see him to know it’s him. You feel him—his presence, his warmth, the way his energy fills the space around you like it always did.

He steps closer, closing the distance between you in a way that feels like the erasure of all those agonizing years of separation. His familiar warmth envelops you, wrapping around you like an embrace you’ve longed for, like a homecoming after a journey that has lasted far too long.

The brush of his thumb against your cheek is achingly gentle, tender as he wipes away the tears that won’t stop falling. His touch, so familiar, yet so missed, sends a wave of emotions crashing over you—grief for the years you lost, joy for the moment you never thought you’d have again.

"You came back to me, finally." His voice is quieter now, the usual teasing that you had come to know so well is gone, replaced by something deeper—something raw and vulnerable, a depth of emotion he often hid beneath his bravado.

There’s relief in his words, but also a quiet sorrow, as if he too felt the weight of all the time you’d spent apart. As if he too had been waiting, missing you just as much as you had missed him.

His breath is warm against your skin, and you hear the slight tremor in his voice, that hint of fragility in the man who always seemed invincible to you. There’s a vulnerability in him now, standing before you, as though he’s afraid this moment might not be real. Afraid that if he holds you too tightly, you might slip away again.

His thumb continues to trace gentle patterns along your cheek, the rhythm of it soothing and familiar, grounding you in the reality that he’s truly here. And as he looks at you, his bright blue eyes softer now, there’s a depth to them that speaks to all the words left unsaid, to all the years spent in separation, to the weight of the grief he carried alone.

"I waited and waited, stalling some gods....." he continues, his voice just above a whisper now, the teasing facade stripped away, leaving only the rawness of his feelings. "I waited so long, and every day… I missed you."

There’s a moment of silence that stretches between you, heavy with the unspoken sorrow of time lost, of love interrupted by forces beyond your control. His hand, still cradling your face, trembles just slightly, as if even Satoru, with all his strength, couldn’t bear the thought of losing you again.

The weight of it all—of everything you endured, everything you lost—comes crashing down at once, and you let out a soft, broken sob. You feel his arms wrap around you, pulling you against him, holding you close like he’s afraid to ever let go.

“I missed you too. So so much.” you whisper into his chest, your tears soaking into the fabric of his shirt. “I never stopped missing you, Satoru.”

You feel his chest rise and fall with a deep breath, his lips pressing softly against your forehead. And for the first time in what feels like forever, the sorrow that’s been living inside you begins to ease. It doesn’t disappear entirely—grief never really does—but here, in Satoru’s arms, it feels lighter. It feels like, maybe, you can finally rest.

And in that moment, you realize that the exhaustion, the waiting—it was all worth it. You're home.

epilogue

The afterlife wasn’t exactly what you expected. Instead of floating through clouds or endless fields of serenity, you found yourself at what looked like an airport terminal. Before you could process how bizarre this was, you spotted them—Kaiko and Namie, both waving like maniacs from the crowd.

“Finally!” Kaiko shouts, sprinting toward you with the grace of someone who has no concept of personal space. Namie follows, beaming brightly, and within seconds, they’re both squeezing the life out of you.

“Guys, air... I need air!” you gasp, but they only hug you tighter. Kaiko plants a kiss on your cheek, and Namie loops an arm around your waist like they’ve been waiting years for this reunion.

“We missed you so much, you know?” Kaiko pouts, ignoring your protests. “The afterlife just isn’t the same without you.”

“Excuse me.” You look over Kaiko’s shoulder to see Satoru, sunglasses slightly askew, his mouth pulled into a pout that could rival a spoiled child’s. “You’re hogging my wife.”

Kaiko smirks, not even turning to look at Satoru. “Your wife? Funny, because I’m pretty sure I was her first love.” She raises an eyebrow, tilting her head ever so slightly as if daring him to challenge the claim.

Satoru's eyes narrow behind his shades. “That was ages ago, you homewrecker! She married me—” he steps forward, pointing at the both of you— “not you.”

“Oh please,” Kaiko rolls her eyes. “I’ve known her longer. I laid the groundwork. I was and always will be the original concept!”

Satoru steps closer, his height towering over Kaiko but Kaiko isn’t fazed. “She chose me.”

“She settled for you, shitty eyes!” Kaiko quips, her grin widening. “There’s a difference.”

And that’s all it takes. Satoru’s eyebrow twitches, and suddenly they’re in each other’s faces like squabbling children. You can barely get a word in before they start throwing insults—Kaiko jabbing at Satoru’s height, Satoru boasting about his undeniable charm.

“Guys, seriously?” You rub your temples, trying to hold back laughter. “This is ridiculous.”

Geto Suguru, ever the voice of reason (or at least the one who knows when to pick his battles), sidles up beside you with a casual smile. “Looks like some things never change.”

You grin at him, feeling a sense of ease that only Suguru can bring. “Tell me about it. Can’t believe I’m back and they’re already fighting over me.”

“Typical Satoru!” Suguru laughs. “He never could handle competition.” He offers you a knowing look, then gestures to the absurd scene in front of you. “Should we break it up?”

“Nah, let them tire themselves out.” you reply, waving a hand dismissively. “They’ll realize how stupid they’re being soon enough.”

As if on cue, Kaiko flicks Satoru in the forehead. “She loved my kisses first!”

“Oh, for—" Satoru huffs, about to lunge at Kaiko when you step in between them. “She loved mine more!”

“Oh shut up,your kisses are slimy and disgusting!”

“HUH!? You take that back!”

“Ugly frog! Bwah!”

“Alright, enough.” You shake your head, stifling a laugh. “Satoru, Kaiko, stop acting like children. I’m here for everyone, okay?”

“Everyone except Kaiko.” Satoru mutters under his breath.

Suguru chuckles beside you, giving you a side glance. “Welcome back.”

You smile, patting his shoulder. “Good to be back. I see things haven’t changed much.”

As Kaiko and Satoru continue bickering like they’re back in high school, Suguru leans over, smirking. “Should we take bets on who wins this round?”

You laugh, shaking your head. “Nah, I’m putting my money on Namie. She’s going to step in and drag both of them away soon enough.”

And, just like clockwork, Namie swoops in, grabbing Kaiko by the arm and tugging her toward the exit, muttering about “taking this fight outside.”

Satoru watches them go, arms crossed, still pouting. He looks at you, expectant, as if waiting for reassurance.

You chuckle, stepping closer and placing a hand on his chest. “Relax, Satoru. You know you’re the one I chose.”

His pout softens into a grin, and he leans down to kiss your forehead. “Damn right.”

And with that, the chaos of the airport fades into the background, as you bask in the comfort of having your husband by your side—and of course, the endless entertainment of old rivals.

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roosterforme · 7 months ago

Text

Covering the Classics Part 12 | Bob Floyd x OC

Summary: When Anna noticed that a new poem by her favorite, amateur writer had been posted, she was afraid to read the finality in his tone. But Bob always managed to surprise her. And maybe she could find a way to surprise Kevin, too.

Warnings: Angst, Kevin is a dick, adult language, 18+

Length: 3600 words

Pairing: Robert "Bob" Floyd x Female OC (this story is part of the Beer Boy/Sugar and Jake/Jessica universe)

Covering the Classics masterlist. Check my masterlist for more!

After that, it was radio silence. Anna didn't reach out to Bob, and he didn't try to either. He went to the Hard Deck on Friday night and lasted about an hour before excusing himself. Nobody asked him why he was bailing after one ginger ale and a single cup of peanuts, and that was enough to tell him that everyone knew. Everyone knew he slept with Anna. Everyone knew she was married. Everyone knew that they shouldn't talk about it in front of him for fear that the ladies would snap their necks. Even Nat was being very kind and considerate which wasn't really like her at all.

When Bob was halfway to the door, he felt a small hand curl around the back of his bicep. "I'll see you tomorrow night for D&D?"

He nodded down at Jessica's hopeful face. "Yeah. I can pick you up if you want."

Her face brightened a little bit. "I'll text you in the morning." He turned to walk out, and her hand slid down his arm. "Hey, Bob? Don't give up hope on her, okay?"

He didn't know how to respond, so he just kept walking. He had no idea what to say or what to think. It wasn't like he could stop loving someone overnight. He didn't really want to either. Anna's life was quite frankly messier than he had ever expected. She did a pretty good job of hiding it from everyone, and it seemed like she would have continued down that path if they didn't have sex. And that was the other issue; it wasn't just sex to Bob. Anna knew about the things he tried to hide himself, and she seemed to want him in that moment anyway.

Her words from the previous night made him ache.

'You're perfect. You're Sky Writing. You're the handsome man from the bookstore who smells like tea and soap. You're Bob, the guy my friends knew I would fall in love with as soon as I met them.'

If that meant she was in love with him or that she thought she could be someday, then he was afraid to walk away from her. But now he was terrified of getting hurt or somehow hurting Anna like Kevin had. Part of him believed if he could just see Anna's husband with his own eyes, confirm that he was exactly the way she described him, then he might be able accept that she just needed time to settle her divorce and to heal. If that was the case, he wanted to make it work.

In the meantime, when he got home, he ended up standing in his living room, staring at his bookshelf before going upstairs and staring at his bed. He could still picture her red hair all spread out for him. He could still feel it between his fingers as the silky strands slid along his palm. He could taste her on his tongue. He could hear her telling him what she wanted.

Bob picked up his computer and slipped under the covers, knowing he wasn't going to be able to sleep right now.

----------------------------

It had been there since early Saturday morning. A new one. Anna desperately wanted to read it and memorize it like she had the others, but she was afraid to face the finality. Her email alert mocked her every time she looked at it.

Sky Writing has posted a new, original work! Click the link below to check out the subscriber that you follow!

Bob wrote a new poem, and she didn't think she could handle reading exactly how he viewed her now. He'd never be like Kevin, openly belittling her or putting her down, but she knew the shiny packaging had been removed now, and he saw what was really inside. Just a mess of a human. She put off reading it and put off reading it, but when she was sitting at her desk at work on Monday, she made herself decide between reading the new poem or calling Kevin. After a fairly short debate, she decided to read the poem. It was probably so bad, calling Kevin later wouldn't even feel painful in comparison.

She tapped on the link in her email and was taken to something so unexpected, she gasped as she read it.

There is empty space on my bookshelf,

The one I bought with you in mind.

I didn't know it was for you at the time,

But one night made it obvious,

Before an instance took it.

Reality surpassed intention today.

Your worn favorites and mine pristine,

Should mingle and mix,

Genre forgotten.

Dog eared pages became so endearing.

But I'll never see them on my shelf,

Unless you come back and stay this time.

The format was different from what he usually wrote, but it was so obviously Sky Writing. So obviously Bob. So obviously about her. And he didn't sound angry. Could he possibly miss her after everything she did and said?

She jumped when her phone vibrated on her desk, and for a split second, she believed it could be Bob. Her heart beat faster with anticipation, but it was from somebody else.

Jessica Reed: If you don't come down to this weird tree right now, we're going to come up and get you.

Anna had lost track of time. It was after noon now. She knew that her friends were trying to make sure she was holding herself together after she refused to go to the Hard Deck over the weekend. How could she continue to go somewhere that Bob had the rights to first? It wasn't until she read his Sky Writing poem that she thought perhaps there was a chance he might not only be okay with her presence but perhaps even miss her like she missed him.

With her sad little lunch in hand, she dragged herself down to the quad, trying to decide when was the best time to call Kevin. She was tired of going through lawyers who couldn't seem to get him to budge, and each ninety day window just ate away at more of her soul. She should have been so much more careful with her writing when she had the opportunity, and now he'd completely locked her out of being able to access it.

No, she was going to have to beg him, plead with him, anything it took to get what she wanted without giving away where she'd moved. Maybe if he agreed to let her have her manuscript, one of her friends would let her borrow money for a flight back to New Jersey to retrieve it. She was getting ahead of herself, but she couldn't help it. She needed to at least get this one thing.

"There she is!"

Anna looked up to see her friends directly in front of her on the bench by the tree, and the fact that they both looked happy to see her made her heart ache. "Hi," she said softly as she sat down between them when they both scooted over.

"Hummus?" her friend asked, passing along a container while she bit into her perfect looking chicken salad sandwich on artisan bread. Anna accepted a few bites of Bradley's gourmet snack, because she was absolutely starving today.

"Thanks," she murmured, and she let herself sink into the background a little bit as the two other women continued the conversation they'd been having. Now that she was down here with his friends, she couldn't stop thinking about Bob again. His soft hair and his kind eyes. The way he always paid attention to her when she was talking. How good he made her feel.

She listened to her friends argue about alumni weekend for a few minutes before she finally cut them off to ask, "Has Bob said anything about me?" Both of them looked at her, and she quickly added, "I can't stop thinking about him."

Jessica smiled softly and said, "Not a word, but I've never seen him look so sad. And I mean that in a good way, because although I know he's confused and hurt, I'm pretty sure he just misses you."

"But," the other woman quickly cut in, "the most important thing right now is making sure you take care of yourself. Even if you are in love with Bob."

"Oh!" Jessica exclaimed. "I have an idea! We could just kill Kevin!"

Anna snorted in spite of herself. "That would actually solve a lot of my problems. Maybe even all of them."

"Only one problem with that," Advanced Calculus said blandly. "You're not a killer, Jessica."

"I could kill someone," Jessica muttered under her breath, and truly Anna almost laughed, because Jessica Reed was one of the gentlest people she'd ever met. The most violent thing about her was her Dungeons & Dragons character. "I could at least probably slap him."

"He wouldn't know what hit him," Anna said, and all three women erupted into laughter. And it felt so strange to feel genuine happiness, even if it only lasted for a few seconds, that Anna almost started crying. As their amusement died down, she asked her friends, "Do you think.... Bob would respond if I texted him?"

Jessica squeaked, and then both women said, "Yes."

---------------------------

Bob was back to square one. Back at the bookstore. He was fifteen minutes early. He was already looking through the Classics. He was about to meet up with Anna. He was nervous.

Nat scoffed when he told her where he was going, and he truly did appreciate that his friend wanted him to proceed with caution, but she just didn't understand how Anna made him feel. Being friends with her after sleeping together a total of one time might kill him, but he knew that was probably all he could have now.

It was almost like he could sense that she was there. He looked up from the Shakespeare volume in his hand, and he saw her walk in the door. As he got closer to the loft railing, he saw her glance up and meet his eyes like it was some depraved version of Romeo and Juliet. She mouthed the word Hi before she headed for the stairs, and in less than a minute, she was standing right in front of him.

Anna looked nervous, but everything else was just the same. Those perfect freckles decorated her face. Her brown eyes were bright. Her pretty hair was in a messy braid. He saw her burgundy nail polish as she fidgeted with her denim jacket. He wanted to know if she still thought he was the kind of person she could love. He wanted to ask her if her husband was any closer to signing papers. Instead he said, "I was surprised when you texted me."

Her eyes went wide, and he wished he could shove his foot in his mouth as she started looking around anywhere but at his face. "I need some books for my feminist literature course, and I just thought maybe you'd like more books for your bookshelf."

Had she read his newest poem? It was a sloppy one that he wrote late on Friday night and posted on a whim. She could have deleted her account by now or vowed never to read anything else by Sky Writing. But that didn't stop the poem from being about her.

"I do need some more books for my shelves," he replied, and her eyes finally settled on his again. "And you don't have to be nervous around me. I know you're dealing with a lot, and I promise I won't touch you or anything."

Now she just looked sad and distraught, but she nodded and turned down the very aisle where they first met. Bob had to fight to keep a few feet of space between them as she said, "I'm looking for Mary Wollstonecraft, Charlotte Perkins Gilman, and Elizabeth Cady Stanton."

They worked their way slowly up and back down each aisle, falling into a natural conversation in spite of the awkwardness between them. In spite of the way Bob couldn't keep himself from looking at her as she ran her fingers along the spines. When she wanted something that was on a top shelf, he reached it down for her. When her hands got full, he offered his up for her use. And to his delight and also sadness, she kept recommending books for him along the way. That's how he ended up with Miss Pettigrew Lives For a Day as well as The Importance of Being Earnest in his hand when she led the way downstairs to pay.

Bob cleared his throat as Anna reached into her pocket for some cash. "I can get them."

Her brown eyes snapped up to meet his, and her cheeks turned pink. He already knew what Kevin did, and while he didn't think there was any harm in saying it, he could tell that she at least had her pride intact. "The college is going to reimburse me," she said firmly before handing forty dollars across the counter.

"Right," Bob said before paying for his own books. When they walked out into the fading sunlight, he looked down into her pretty face. "Will you let me drive you home? Not because I think I need to, but because I want to?"

She seemed at war with herself as she looked across the street and pressed her lips together. But her eyes fluttered closed and she said, "I would really appreciate that."

The interior of his truck was quiet the whole way as their books sat on the seat between them. Only the soft hum of the radio helped Bob hold his thoughts at bay. The ride wasn't too long, and when they were most of the way there, Anna finally spoke.

"I'm going to deal with my shit. I promise."

Unsure exactly how he should respond, Bob simply said, "Okay."

When he pulled up in front of her building, he turned toward her, intending to ask if she wanted him to walk her up, but she was gathering her books together as she said, "I don't know how you feel about me now. I don't know if you could want me again. But I am going to deal with Kevin. I am going to fix my life. Because I want to move on. I need to." When he was so flustered that he didn't immediately respond, Anna said, "You know where to find me. Thanks for the ride."

He watched her run up the sidewalk before struggling to open the door with her arms full, and then she ducked inside when he finally figured out what he wanted to say. "I'll find you."

-------------------------------

If Anna even had a hope or a prayer at a chance with Bob ever again, she needed to work up the nerve. A real chance with him now that he knew all about her disastrous marriage was what she wanted, but she needed to sort Kevin out first.

As far as she could tell, everything came down to two options: keep her freedom by giving Kevin ownership of her manuscript, or keep her self worth by fighting until she didn't have anything left to give up. And both of them sounded terrifying. The whole weekend passed where she tried so many times to call him. She took her phone out again and again, let her thumb hover over her husband's phone number, and then chickened out. His voice was like a distant memory, and she didn't want to bring it back to the forefront of her mind. He hadn't reached out one time since she up and left without telling him where she was going, and she was afraid to let him know where she was now.

The worst part was, he would know immediately why she was calling. He knew that he had the one thing she wanted. He cut off her access to the cloud files where she should have been able to piece her writing back together. It would have been time consuming, but she would have been all too happy to do it. She should have known better than to let him have so much of her life and so many of her resources in only his name, but there was a time when she trusted him. That was the part that made her so sick. She had trusted her husband, and now look where it got her.

A shiver went through her body as she woke up for work too early on Monday morning. She wanted Kevin's computer where everything was saved. She wanted access to the cloud. She didn't want a damn penny from him otherwise. She was aggressively brushing her teeth, wishing she had more to eat than a granola bar when she spit out her toothpaste and rinsed her mouth.

She hated him. She hated him so much, she was going to call him right now. Without a backward glance, she marched over to where her phone was charging and pulled the cable out. Before she could even think about exactly what she was going to say, she tapped on his stupid name.

Anna was breathing fast and deep, her heart pounding in her ears when she heard his voice for the first time in so many months.

"Anna?" he asked, her whole body cringing after just one word. His voice was scratchy as if she had woken him up, but it was 9:16 in New Jersey. He should be on his way to work if not there already.

"Kevin," she snapped, gripping her phone tighter. She was getting angrier by the second as she listened to him yawn while she looked around her tiny apartment.

His tone was condescending as he said, "Of course you'd call me at six in the fucking morning after I haven't hear a word from you except through a lawyer since July. What the hell do you want?"

She couldn't do this. She couldn't talk to him. While she felt strong a few minutes ago, her resolve was already crumbling. She wanted to tell him that he knew damn well what she wanted, but then she zeroed in on what he said. "What do you mean it's six in the morning? It's after nine."

His voice was suddenly loud and harsh. "I meant exactly what I said. I'm in California for a medical convention. Now get to the point of your call."

Her mouth felt like sandpaper as she carefully put her phone on speaker. She started searching for Neurological conventions in California while she told him, "I just want my manuscript. Please, Kevin. That's all I want, and then you can be rid of me."

The bite was gone from his voice, replaced by a lazy tone, and he spoke to her as if she were a very simple child. "It's not going to happen, Anna. I didn't cut off access to it for no reason. It's worth money. You can pay me for it, or you can kiss it goodbye. I might even publish it myself."

She was gasping for air as she scrolled through her search results, coming up with a conference in Carlsbad that was starting today. As the page loaded, she swallowed and told him, "I'll sue you if you do." But even she knew she was full of shit.

"What what money, Anna? I'm surprised you can still afford your lawyers. I don't even want to know what you're doing to make ends meet right now."

Then she saw it. She saw his name. He was a keynote speaker at the National Neurological Physicians Association conference. He was less than an hour away. She sank down to her knees in surprise and fear. Her mind was swirling with information and ideas, and she couldn't even comprehend what Kevin was saying now.

"What?" she gasped.

"I said come up with some money for me, or I'm not signing shit." Then he ended the call as her hands started shaking. She dropped her phone onto her bed. He was in Carlsbad. Maybe she could surprise him. Maybe she could talk him into it easier in person.

Anna had to run to the bathroom to be sick, but her mind was made up. Once she cleaned herself up again, she tearfully made the decision to cancel her morning classes via email, and then she started grabbing her purse and her essentials. She folded up the newest copy of the divorce paperwork her lawyer had emailed to her and tucked it away. Then she ran for the bus stop, nearly tripping several times as she read through the schedule of speakers who were at the conference this week on her phone. If she caught a bus within the next fifteen minutes, she might make it in time to see Kevin right before he gave his welcome speech.

---------------------------

We will meet Kevin in the next chapter. Now is an acceptable time to start sharpening your knives. Bob, please don't give up on Anna. Thanks @beyondthesefourwalls

PART 13

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minus-plus-zer0 · 4 months ago

Note

OKAY! i have another one!! so hear me out. i’ve been really into alice in wonderland and.. what about like. a cheshire cat! reader? like they have their own subliminal space to enter and can do so with some of their body or their whole body and has cat like fangs, ears, tail. whose mischievous and stuff!! sorry thats a rant!!

or like a white rabbit! whose sweet and caring! and has rabbit ears and a rabbit tail and their quirk is to warp time??

Oh dear, I knew never watching Alice in Wonderland was going to bite me in the butt someday.

I'll still try and fulfill your request though! I can only do the white rabbit one though since I have a pretty good idea for how to write them. It'll be a bit long though to make up for not being able to write the cheshire cat reader. This took a while to publish since I had like 2-3 ideas for what to write but I hope the end result is good enough.

As always thank you for requesting!

Alice in Wonderland White Rabbit Reader x Bakugou

♡ Genre: Fluff, little suggestive, little crack ♡ Pairing: Bakugou x White Rabbit!Reader ♡ Tags: Alice in Wonderland inspiration

Your Quirk allowed you to summon telekinetic shields, all of which had the appearance of a watch and functioned like real time clocks. You could defend yourself with the shields or telekinetically spin the shields to go back in time by a few minutes. Because you were born with such a useful power, you knew you had to be a Pro Hero to use time travel for the sake of the greater good.

You often helped out your classmates on the field, including Bakugou Katsuki. You two were total opposites. Due to the nature of your Quirk, you were incredibly patient and cautious, always paying attention to the slight differences in the timeline each time you changed things. Bakugou was neither of those things, and always got into trouble. You often had to warn him of problems oncoming in the near future.

Despite your differences (or maybe because of them), you two quickly grew closer than any other duo in your class. You relied on each other heavily not just due to your Quirks, but also your complementary personalities. Just this afternoon, you had to save Bakugou from his impending demise.

"Bakugou!" you cried, hurrying to him as he sat on the dorm's living room couch. "Kaminari's gonna burst in through the entrance doors with a homemade confetti gun and he's gonna blast you in the face. We need to run!"

Bakugou set down the magazine he was reading on the coffee table. "I'm gonna kill him."

"No, please don't! We need to run!"

"I'll kill him and then neither of us will have to run! I'm saving us a jog!"

"No, you don't understand, he'll--"

"Bakugouuuu!" Kaminari yelled, bursting onto the scene. "Where are yoouuuuu?"

"You're dead, Dunce Face!"

"What the--who snitched on me to Bakugou? Agh!" Kaminari narrowly dodged an explosion by Bakugou. "Hasta la vista, Bakugou!"

You ducked behind the couch. Bakugou received a full confetti blast to the face. You sighed and summoned your time shields. You rewound time back to when Bakugou sat on the couch.

"Bakugou!" you cried, popping up behind the couch.

"AH! Fuck, shit, why the hell are you back there?"

You hurried around the couch. "Maybe because you didn't listen to me when I warned you the first time!"

He looked confused. "Is this something future me did?"

"Yes. Kaminari's about to come through the entrance with a confetti gun and we really, really need to run."

Bakugou set down the magazine he was reading on the coffee table. "I'm gonna kill him."

Bakugou stood up but you placed a hand on his chest, pushing him back. "Please, I've already seen you get blasted with confetti more than I've ever hoped to see in one lifetime. Just run."

"But I--"

"Bakugouuuu!" Kaminari yelled, bursting onto the scene. "Where are yoouuuuu?"

You grabbed Bakugou's wrist and summoned your time shields, spinning them and sending you both back into time. Kaminari walked backwards out of the entranceway as you returned to the past.

"I probably should've done that in the first place..." you said.

"I could've taken him!" Bakugou yelled.

You groaned and dragged Bakugou away from his impending doom. He kept protesting but didn't leave your grasp. He knew if he left your grasp, you'd just rewind time and stop him all over again.

You hurried over to the nearest small closet and shoved Bakugou inside the cramped space, shutting the door behind you two. The closet was only filled with a few random items people left behind, such as an unused deck of playing cards, a large dresser somebody left there long ago, and other unrelated things. You barricaded the door with the dresser. You knew your classmates wouldn't destroy school property just for a joke, so there was no way they'd be physically busting that door down if they couldn't open it normally.

"Why the fuck can't we just hide in one of our rooms?" Bakugou asked, leaning against a wall. The closet was small enough that he was still within arm's distance of you.

"Because that was one of the first places they looked in a previous timeline," you said matter-of-factly. "And Kaminari's not the only one searching for you with a homemade confetti gun."

"Our classmates are such nutjobs."

"Yes, but they're still our friends!" You lightly tapped Bakugou on the nose.

"You mean your friends." He tapped you back on the nose, somewhat more vengefully. "If I had it my way, our problems would've been buried six feet under ages ago."

"Well they're not, and now we're stuck in a closet." You rapped your knuckles on the closet walls. "There's not a lot of safe hiding spots, so let's just wait here until they pick another target and/or run out of confetti. I'm pretty sure they're gonna start blasting each other. I overheard them suggesting that in a different timeline and they were getting a teensy bit antsy until they found you."

Bakugou scoffed. "See? This is why I don't wanna call these nutjobs 'friends'!"

"But we eat lunch with them almost everyday..."

"I'm only there because you're there."

"Lies."

"Not lies. I never lie."

You both stood there, staring each other down suspiciously. You simultaneously both broke into grins.

Bakugou laid his head against the closet wall. "I'm being honest, you know that?"

You rubbed you arms, a little shy due to his earnestness. "You don't have to follow me around everywhere, you big dork..." You lightly punched him in the shoulder.

"You're the one that yanked me into a closet."

"I just want to protect you!" you said. "You know I don't like seeing people get hurt."

"I know I've told you this a million times, but stop worrying about me, okay?" He stopped leaning against the closet wall and got a little closer, which was easy since the space was so cramped. "You're always running yourself ragged for me."

"Only because I know you'd do the same." You beamed at him.

"Yeah... why do you think that is?"

"Huh?"

"...Nevermind. Shit, if we're gonna be in here for a while we need something to pass the damn time. My phone's almost dead."

"Mine too," you whined. "Let's sit down, I'm tired."

You both slid into a sitting position, your legs in-between Bakugou's.

"Since we got all the time in the world, quite literally with my time powers, I kiiiinda wanna style your hair!"

"What the fuck? No!"

"Pleeeease?" Your hands ran through the fluffy spiky locks before you. His eyes peered up at you, surprisingly innocent and curious as to what you would do to him. "I think you'd look really cute with a braid. I've been reading some fashion blogs and it'd look super trendy!"

"It'd look bad. Don't wanna. I'd rather do your hair." His hand curled behind your head, pulling you forward to him. "Yours is softer." He looked at you, cocky and teasing.

Sometimes Bakugou did things like this that really made you question the true nature of your friendship. You were the only person to seemingly see Bakugou's... flirty side? Was this flirting? You couldn't tell with him. You didn't know if he was being serious or not, given that he's never dated before you had no point of reference on how he would react in a situation like that. So this couldn't be flirting. Yeah, that's it.

But the way Bakugou was looking at you, all smug yet simultaneously a little flushed and nervous, made you doubt that thought. Just a little.

"Well?" Bakugou asked, his voice low. His hand was still in your hair, his head was still so close to yours. "What do you wanna do?"

You knew what you wanted to do. You've wanted to kiss your best friend for the longest time. But one thing you would never do was kiss and rewind. You couldn't live comfortably knowing that you got intimate with someone, but they just forgot. It felt wrong to mess with their memory like that. So you had never kissed Bakugou before.

You couldn't tell him that, you couldn't risk your friendship. Shyly, your hands exited his hair as you brought them back close to your chest. "Um... I don't know... I'm fine with anything you want, I guess?"

"But I was asking you, dummy!" He exhaled through his nose, his hand leaving your hair. "Again, I'm serious here. You're always thinking about what I want to do, what's best for me. But what do you want to do with your life? I won't judge you for your answer, if that's what you're thinking."

"Um..." You bit your lip, wanting to look anywhere but at Bakugou but there was really nothing to look at in this small closet space. "Well, if you really insist... I kinda wanted to kiss you."

"W-w hat?!" His face heated up.

"Like, everywhere. It's 'cause you've never had your first kiss before, so I wanted to see your reaction to a million different kisses with my time powers. But I know that's not cool, so I've never done it. I didn't want to bother you or ruin our friendship..."

"Try me."

"What?!"

"You heard me!" Bakugou started sweating a little but nonetheless, he wasn't backing down. "Do you damn thing. It's not like I'm gonna remember it."

"Bakugou, that's not exactly moral."

"It's moral if I'm telling you I'll allow it. I trust you and I wanna see what timeline we end up with."

If he was giving you the go-ahead, then you assumed this was okay...

"I'll be gentle at first, alright? I would never wanna hurt you..."

He looked a little frustrated, as if you weren't understanding something.

"...You won't."

You cupped his face and his eyes widened slightly. You wanted to give him his first kiss (it's been your dream for a while), but you'd rather dip your toes into the water than dive deep head first. So you leaned up and kissed him on the nose.

Bakugou perked his head up. "What?! I thought you--don't chicken out!"

"I'm not chickening out, I'm just testing the waters..."

"On the nose isn't the same! You gotta--"

You rewound time to before he started complaining. You returned to your new present time, giggling a little.

"...The hell?" he asked, still sitting in front of you awaiting his first kiss. "...Were you gentle?"

"No," you said, evilly. "You almost died of a heart attack from how good a kisser I was and I had to rewind to a point where you didn't die."

Bakugou cocked his head, looking at you deadpan. "Now why don't I believe you?"

You snapped forward and kissed his cute vulnerable forehead. He gasped.

"You'll believe me eventually!" you said, acting coy.

"You little--"

You rewound time to a point where he didn't want to retaliate against your sudden sweet kiss.

"Wha--you look too damn happy!" Bakugou said, pointing at you accusingly. "What the fuck did you do?"

"Bakugou, you told me it was your first time kissing..." you said, hands on your face looking shy as you turned away from him. "You didn't have to go that far..."

"What the fuck are you on about? I don't even remember what you're referencing! Just... what... what did we do?"

He looked genuinely anxious and you wanted to burst out into laughter because you literally did almost nothing besides a few kisses, but he didn't know that.

"Something like this," you said.

You cupped his face again and pulled his head forward, kissing him on the lips. You started soft, wanting your kiss to be something he could safely fall into. But he quickly bit your lip and pushed himself in, not settling for anything safe. The sensation was much better than whatever you'd daydreamed about, especially knowing that he wanted this, that this was real, and that his lips kept asking yours for more.

Bakugou moved much more eagerly and desperately than you. What he lacked in experience, he made up for by going all-in, all the time. He just wanted everything, all of you, all at once. But you were more focused on taking everything slow to make sure he enjoyed every second of your lips as much as possible. Your fingers dug through his hair, while one of his hands snaked around your waist to pull you further into his lap and your mind couldn't help but agree with all of it.

You broke the kiss and you both breathed heavily in each other's faces. Bakugou looked so incredibly vulnerable and exposed in the dim closet lighting, his mouth slightly open in surprise.

"Do you wanna settle on that timeline?" you asked.

"No." His mouth quickly morphed into smirk. "Keep going. I wanna see how far this rabbit hole goes. How many times you'll kiss me and still come back for more."

With his permission, you rewound time again to the same spot as usual, right after the point where Bakugou gave you the approval you needed for this idea. Once you emerged, Bakugou gave an undignified yelp.

His back instinctively hit the closet wall. "Shit! The fuck are you doing in my lap?" He eyed you up and down.

You curled up into a ball, still between his legs. "You pulled me here! It's your fault!"

"I did?" He looked so genuinely confused, it was so cute. But then he soon returned to his arrogant self. "Oh, I see. Of course you must've let me drag you in. You really are--"

You shut him up with your lips. He gasped in your mouth, frozen in place from the shock. But as your hands crawled up his neck, he sunk further into your embrace as he realized what you were doing. Then he pushed back, turning this kiss competitive. You just wanted him to stop mouthing off all the time, but he wanted to show he wasn't easily gonna surrender this moment, not when you were finally giving him the attention he so desperately craved. Bakugou kissed you with much more force than you ever gave him, his hands greedy with you knowing he was able to hold you after waiting so, so long. You broke through his waves of passion by biting his lip lightly to catch him off guard and slowing him down.

Your hands slowly danced around the collar of his shirt, feeling his rapid heart beat before you tugged him towards you. Now your sweeter lips could find better purchase upon his rougher ones. His lips mixed somewhat clumsily with yours, his technique suffering from the intensity of his nervousness and passion. His body felt like a jumbled bundle of nerves against your own. But his kisses oozed his personality, all the good and the bad, that you just couldn't help but want more of him, no matter what he gave you.

This kiss was longer, allowing you both to get your fill before you separated, both gasping for air.

"I think that was the best one so far," you said.

"Knowing you, you're only saying that 'cause you haven't tried anything else."

He got you there. The day had barely begun.

"I see that look on your face," he said, tapping your forehead which was so close to his. "I'm betting I'm right. You wouldn't look so shy in my arms right now if you've kissed me a lot more. But you're clearly not as shy as before..."

"Stop reading my mind, Bakugou, that's not supposed to be your Quirk!" You pouted at him, crossing your arms.

"Then rewind so you don't gotta hear me speak!"

"Well... I don't really want to. Maybe I want you to remember this. Maybe I don't want to be the only one who knows what these kisses were like... It's not what I thought it would be. Rewinding to catch your first kiss isn't as fun as making sure you share all the memories I have." Your hand ran through his spikes. His expression was so tender when you touched him. "So I really want you to remember this next part, okay?"

He stared at you. He nodded.

You slowly drew upon him, backing him against the wall as you leaned forward to kiss him. You felt his body automatically stiffen before you met each other half-way. His hands remained on your hips, copying your careful pace as you drank his lips in, savoring his sensations and showing him how much you wanted every memory you made with him.

Instead of fighting you or teasing you, he followed your lead, letting your mouth move upon his however you wanted it to. He let you take control of him. Bakugou bit your lip, just as you did to him earlier, giving the kiss a little more spice. As your hands dipped around his neck, his hands mirrored yours around your waist. He didn't rush through the kiss this time, didn't rush to see everything you had to offer as soon as possible like he was so starved for your affection. Now he wanted to do whatever you were doing, and to be with you wherever you were going.

His strong arms tightly pulled you against him as you continued your slow-motion makeout session. You wanted to relive this moment seconds after it started, but you didn't dare use your time powers so he wouldn't forget.

You finally let him breathe again, your foreheads still touching even though you parted. He gazed down upon you, lovingly.

"You gotta be my girlfriend after this," he said, voice quiet. "...Please? You can't tell me that meant nothing."

"Yes..." you said, and he served you the cutest smile you'd ever seen. "I wanna be with you, always. Just like we are now."

"Of fucking course." He laughed a little out of relief as he pecked your jaw a few times. You knew he'd never kissed anyone anywhere before, but damn was he a fast learner when he was copying you. He also couldn't help but give you one last hug, squeezing you like a stuffed animal.

He finally released you from the hug, his hands still clung to your body. "I'll always be with ya. Never wanted anything more. Jeez, I've been waiting for you to say that since forever."

You pecked him on the nose. "Guess I was just a little late. But you've probably been waiting as long as I have for you." He grinned warmly at you for that comment.

"Can we spend the afternoon hiding in here?" you asked. "I kind of don't want to leave... Not while they're still out there."

"I still think I could take 'em," Bakugou said.

"No offense, but from what I've seen I know you definitely can't take them. I'm saving you by keeping you in here." You poked his chest.

He looked exasperated with the suggestion. "Saving me, huh?" He pecked you on the forehead. "Well fine! I didn't wanna leave this spot anyways." He gave your hips a few appreciative pats. "I'll stay wherever you are. You're the only one I'd let boss me around like this, got it? I still trust ya so much."

"Gotcha! Here, hold onto me. I wanna rewind so we'll have more time together..."

You squeezed Bakugou's hand as you summoned your time shields again, rewinding further back.

However, you didn't notice that you had rewound time too far, moving the dresser back to its original position.

It wasn't until several minutes later that you realized your mistake. You and Bakugou made just a bit too much noise, leading to Kaminari opening the closet door.

"Hasta la vista, Bakugou!"

And you both were shot with confetti, full blast.

(Fun fact: The reader's Quirk was partially based off of a certain characters' time powers from Puella Magi Madoka Magica as well as the White Rabbit's watch, so it might seem familiar to some)

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a-dauntless-daffodil · 10 months ago

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maaan it'd be so EASY for chaggie to end up with an adopted cannibal kid after the battle with heaven, tho

with Vaggie's past (and that being a Thing she can Charlie can talk about now), her having her big WAIT THIS IS EVIL IM BEING EVIL moment over a cannibal child she couldn't bring herself to kill....

add to that Charlie, who is now the DIRECT reason quite a few cannibals are Extra Super Dead, thanks to her inspiring them into battle with her song-

"Have you ever felt like you're willing to die-"

very rousing, maybe less fun for her to remember after some of them DID die-

oh hush y'all eat ppl im sure dying isn't the most shocking outcome of a night out that you can imagine

Charlie legit pitched facing final death as a "chance to travel" and "see more of hell" and she did it with a jolly song and dance and GOOD ON HER for getting a fighting force to protect the dream of sinners someday being redeemed! ....but yeah. kinda heavy for her to remember later on, i'd think

and Cannibal Town residents are so tight knit with each other that it's a literal PLOT POINT Charlie has to face off against- no way they don't have families, no way there weren't families broken up by the battle at the Hazbin Hotel- at Charlie's hotel

No way Charlie wouldn't feel guilty about and responsible as FUCK for any little cannibal kid who ended up orphaned as a result....

ahem

(is that kid wearing like frisbee on their head?? whatever. it looks kinda like a halo don't it. kinda ironic. isn't it)

Rosie would even have to SUGGEST anything! She's got a good read on Charlie now and she's 100% on board with Alastor's plans to "guide" Charlie (cough manipulate and use cough cough)

and what would make a better leverage point than introducing a little cannibal kid for Charlie to worry and feel guilty over? an ORPHANED cannibal kid. Orphaned by the same fight Charlie led the cannibals into. Orphaned when the kid's parents DIED fighting for Charlie

(great way for Charlie to always keep Cannibal Town in mind anyway. Good way to make sure she's protective of it)

but oh the irony if Rosie didn't even MEAN for chaggie to end up with the kid!

if Rosie DIDN'T fully understand- just how much Charlie would want to give a loving family and childhood to someone, when she herself had one and is now dealing (trying to deal) with all that crumbling away as an adult-

ALSO THO. IF. Hypothetically. the orphan was the same kid Vaggie spared. Like how many sinner kids are there in hell. Not too many running around. If it was the same kid. if Vaggie saw that

....if the kid saw her- or, no, even better- if when she tried talking quietly with them, and when they heard her voice like that they looked up at her suddenly like

cannibal kid: "...Go."

Vaggie: (instantly standing up) "Right, sorry- I'll go get Charlie, or- would you rather Rosie-" (stops) (looks down)

Vaggie: "...?"

cannibal kid: (is holding onto the end of her hair ribbon)

cannibal kid: (whispering) "Run."

cannibal kid: (hopefully) "Now...?"

Vaggie: "...you, remember?"

cannibal kid: (nods)

Vaggie: (slowly sits back down)

Vaggie: "Yeah, hey. That was... that was a thing, wasn't it. It's, been a while. Three years... didn't think you'd recognize me."

cannibal kid: "Didn't. Look different."

Vaggie: "The long hair, missing eye and missing wings is a lot of change, huh?"

cannibal kid: (shrugs) "You're happy." (sniffles) "It's different."

Vaggie: ".....well, Charlie's the one who did all that. She's, pretty great at that stuff. And she'd like make things different for you too now. If you want."

cannibal kid: "........if I stay at the hotel... can I play with Razzle every day? Not, not just when princess Charlie brings him over?"

Vaggie: "Kinda looks like your stuck with him either way to me. Maybe check he's getting enough air, stuffed down into your coat front like that?"

cannibal kid: (unbuttoning an air hole for Razzle) "But he belongs at the hotel, where Dazzle's murmur- marble- um- murder dial-"

Vaggie: "Memorial..?"

cannibal kid: "Where Dazzle's memorial is."

Vaggie: "If you're okay leaving Cannibal Town, you can belong there too."

cannibal kid: "I'm okay leaving town."

cannibal kid: (beat)

cannibal kid: "It's boring."

Vaggie: "Yeah well, the hotel is definitely not gonna be boring."

cannibal kid: "Does it get blown up EVERY week, or just on special occasions?"

Vaggie: "It sure felt like every week but we're trying to cut back."

cannibal kid: "Dang."

please imagine tho, Charlie seeing this sad orphan kid who won't talk to anyone, maybe even "hasn't so much as had a nibble on anyone, the poor little biter" according to Rosie, since being orphaned-

and the next time Charlie visits she brings RAZZLE

and she introduce the two of them, then stands back and watches her childhood plushy turned demon win over this kid SO FAST, disappearing into their tiny but fierce little hugs, getting them to share a donut with him, showing them how to do a little song and dance routine (one him, Charlie, and Dazzle used to do) bringing a bit of normalcy back to a kid who's parents are dead because of her-

Charlie thinking to herself, that the least she can do, really, is give this kid as many of the best parts of HER own childhood as she can

#hazbin hotel #charlie morningstar #vaggie #chaggie #rosie hazbin hotel #silly au #orphaned cannibal kid adoption shenanigans #i can give chaggie kids in so many silly ways that don't involve the normal one #but this one #could ALMOST work within canon???#XD

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nica-my-beloved · 5 months ago

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Tropes In Ikemen Series Games That I Dislike

These are my opinion so no hate!

MC BEING SHY AND BLUSHING AT THE SLIGHTEST TEASING

Some times I find it cute, but other times I wish she would just tease the male leads back.

A lighthearted flirtatious teasing would be funny to watch.

TOO MUCH SEXUAL INTERACTIONS

I understand, it spices up the story but when the most random interaction suddenly turn into a hot making out session just turns me off.

Some times in some scenes, when the moment is right, the whole steamy scene does feel nice. But not all cases.

SUBMISSIVE MCs

I mean, it's fine. I just wish the MCs were more diverse. The Ikemen MCs are way too submissive for my good. They don't even TRY to resist the advances of male lead.

They are so much in love with the guy they met for 2 weeks that they are ready to let them sleep with her, which is awkward as hell.

VERY PURE HEARTED MCs

I don't mind again, but they are not relatable at all. And I've already mentioned in one of my posts that MCs are not meant to be relatable. They are just tools that the writers use for spoon-feeding the stories to the players (because they think we're too dumb to understand the character's personality or intentions). But that doesn't mean I don't want variety.

There are so many different personalities, yet why are the MCs always so kind, so hardworking, so pure, so timid. Some times I dream about an MC who is lazy, foodie, loves shopping, doesn't like studying, doesn't care about what people say about her, doesn't like talking to people, doesn't even try to get along with people who treats her like shit, likes anime and has wallpapers of shirtless Sylus on her laptop, never follows rules......am I describing myself? Yep!

MCs don't have to hold a gun or kill someone or be the Queen of the Underworld. She can still be cool wearing pajamas and sunglasses, dancing on top of her bed at Shinee's Ring Ding Dong (I still love that song!)

THE USUAL CLICHES

Including random people coming inside the room (without knocking ofc), sees MC and a male lead in bed (fully clothed, or not doesn't matter) and still thinking that they slept together. Also MC wasting time and energy to clear up their 'misunderstanding'.

MC's promising that she will never fall in love but breaks her promise. She had one job!

MCs......*holding back puke* teaching male leads turru love *cringe 101*

Similar personality male leads. For example: Kurama, Silvio, Jude. Arthur, Sueharu, Nokto, Nica. I need more variety.

One month time period bullshit! It doesn't matter when at the end MCs are leaving their world to join the male lead (who they know only for a month). Maybe give like a 6 months or an year. Then I'll believe you.

I don't like the killing trope, where the male leads openly saying 'I'll kill you someday'. It triggers me and I don't really find it romantic in any sense.

Always MCs falling in love first and not the male lead. I understand that we play from the MC's perspective, but I really want to know how it feels when the male lead fall in love with MC first. It could be interesting.

Male leads leaving/breaking-up with MCs for her own happiness is also bullshit. I'm tired of seeing this over and over again and it annoys me. The male leads would always be like 'MC, you're not suppose to be in this world. You deserve happiness blah blah blah...' I don't like this because at the end, they eventually change their minds and decides to accept her. If they wanted her then why let go of her? So annoying. I just want a male lead, who is like 'I don't care if my world is shitty, I love MC and I want to be with her! I'll always make her happy and protect her!'

#shiro's hot takes #ikemen games #ikemen villains #ikemen series #ikemen prince #ikemen genjiden #ikepri #ikevil #ikegen #otome #otome game #ikemen game

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shallowseeker · 18 days ago

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hello there!! i’ve been searching for posts about how dean’s “i need you” in goodbye stranger feels more significant (i guess is the word?) than the original “i love you” and i was wondering what your thoughts on it were :)

I think a poet might be able to answer your ask better, so I invite my dashfam to point me to good linguistic posts.

///

As for me, I'm not sure I actually consider one line more meaningful than the other, and I'm not convinced Cas would have understood "I love you" at this point in his life (mentally wounded, brainwashed, thrown around by Heaven) any better than an "I need you."

I think it's highly likely that Cas wasn't actually lying when he said he didn't know what broke the connection in the crypt. That perhaps he couldn't parse his own feelings, especially with his then-fresh mental wounds. (I have this frankly incoherent rambling about how the inability to translate the angel tablet in season 8 is in parallel to how Cas can't read his own emotions/heart. I'll rewrite it to make it make more sense... someday.)

On the other hand, unlike Cas, I think Dean's I love you / I need you line does imply that Dean has worked through his own turbulent confusion with "why Cas feels different than everyone else." We see the line of questioning introduced in The Born-Again Identity, with Dean pondering aloud why he can't shake this and insisting that "of course (the reason) matters!" Dean realized back then that Cas was different. It was charged with... something.

Then, we see such jilted behavior from Dean in the episodes after this... both with Naomi's "I only wish he felt the same way," and Dean's silent treatment towards Cas in the bunker. It seems to me that Dean knows his own heart and is frustrated trying to "read" Cas's intentions, especially with how Heaven keeps wounding Cas over and over, rendering Cas psychologically unable to find his own footing (which is why Cas flees; all that brainwashing is too topsy-turvey for him to get his own bearings and directions sorted out).

///

But I think what interests me most about this season with regards to "I need you," is in the continued motif of Dean's outstretched hand.

We first see Dean's outstretched hand introduced in Purgatory, and it is THE through-line for much of the season. Even the scenes and relationships that aren't about Cas... are about Cas. When Cas throws Dean's hand away, Dean is floored—wounded to the point of rewriting his own memory. After he learns the truth, he's left wondering if he's misunderstood everything that was growing between him and Cas.

But Dean's "I need you / I love you" speaks to his consistently reaching out to Cas anyway, despite all the odds and despite Cas's numerous rejections. Dean just keeps reaching for Cas. He can't help it! (Dean is holding out hope that they do want each other, once the interference and obstacles are removed, that maybe they'll see that in each other... if they just get the chance.)

The motif of hands is so fascinating in season 8, because it's echoed in other relationships, too. For example, when Sam loses faith in himself, he injures his own hand, which Dean bandages in an echo of Church as "the small family supporting each other," against a gorgeous background of the Church as "the corporate megapower," with the angels falling. (It's a beautiful contrast of the different human and angel families.)

There's also how Cas cuts off the hand of (romantic) love, The Cupid, and how the Cupid willingly lets it happen. She extends her hand and lets Cas cut if off, the same way Dean was extending his hand to Cas in the crypt, thinking "I love you. I forgive you," and saying "I need you. We're family."

///Note: It's also like Theee Mixtape: (Love) is a gift. You keep those.

Reaching out is about love, acceptance, and connection. While Dean is doing all this reaching, Cas spends the season being psychologically wounded and threatened by Heaven, running for safety, and then--cutting out hearts and cutting off hands.

///

Yes, so when I look at the Crypt scene, and I see Cas twist and break Dean's arms and Dean is still REACHING... that is what fascinates me the most.

In this season, Dean is trying to help Cas at his own expense, even though Dean wants them to be together, he's helping Cas "fix Heaven," even though Heaven is going to take Cas away from Dean.

^ Here they sit, no longer in the kitchen-of-intimacy but in the bar-of-friendship, lamenting their inability to be in a romantic relationship together.

Dean knows he's in love with Cas at this point, I think, and while he suspected Cas had feelings for him, Dean withdraws, trying to respect Cas's space and support him in his chosen path of permanent, painful separation. (Dean knows how it is, of course, to support your family at the expense of your own personal happiness.)

Little does Dean know, that Cas's main motivation for fixing Heaven is to protect his human family. Metatron echoes it, and in The Great Escapist Naomi underlines to Cas that Heaven would not hesitate hurt his human loved ones.

METATRON: At the very least, it would st – [dog barking in distance, another warning] It would stop the fighting up there from spilling out down here, which will happen. It always does.

(In her pursuit of Cas, Naomi destroys the humans in the family diner in The Great Escapist.)

///

But by the time Cas is actually ready to take Dean's hand, Gadreel engineers a reversal of the outstretched hand, kicking Cas out of the bunker, in a parallel to Dean from season 8, Cas is the one left thinking that he's misunderstood everything.

This is underlined by his soliloquy to the baby. In an episode where it's shown that "medic angels" react to emotional pain as readily as physical, we're left to wonder: is this how angels were trained to deaden their emotions in the first place?

No wonder they might not recognize what they're feeling. No wonder Cas has struggled to connect to his own emotions whether he's human or angel. Maybe it takes "becoming closer to human" for angels to connect with that deadened part of their hearts/minds.

CASTIEL (to the baby): Nobody told you. Nobody explained. You're just … shoved out kicking and screaming into this human life, without any idea why any of it feels the way it feels, or why this confusion, which feels like it's … a hair's breadth (The baby stops crying.) from terror or pain. You know, just when you think you do understand, it'll turn out you're wrong. You didn't understand anything at all. Guess that's just how it is when you're new at this. You know, it wasn't that long ago when all I'd need to do to ease your pain was touch you.

I think it's so fascinating that Dean and Cas are framed as (romantically) reaching for each other over and over,. Not to mention, with Dean wearing "the handprint" on his shoulder, because Dean's a character with his heart obviously on his sleeve... if you dare to REALLY look at him anyway (as Dean invited Mary to do, to see him).

In Dean and Cas's fights, they tend to break each others' arms/hands, and yet... they continue to reach for each other... in parallel.

x - x - x - x - x - x - x

///

ADDITION: That family needs each other is a theme that is used over and over in this series. We are shown loss and love in almost every form (familial, friendship, etc. Ex: The Chuck and Amara forgiveness speech.)

But it's the motifs around the Dean-Cas one in particular that lends an intensely romantic context that imho sets it apart from the other instances.

#spn 8x17 #spn 10x22 #spn 9x17 #spn goodbye stranger #spn the born-again identity #spn the prisoner #family needs each other is a theme that is used over and over in this series #it is quite intense #but it's the motifs around this particular NEED that to me set it apart from the other instances of purely familial need in the series

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hobvitr · 2 years ago

Note

Spider Noir x reader pretty please??

spider noir x reader

gn!reader

genre/warnings: domestic fluff, established relationship, marriage talk, unrevised writing

note: thank you for the request! i was wanting to do something for noir! and I'm here asking to all of you to be your favorite domestic fluff writer because i'm a sucker for that genre. i swear. recommended song: from the start - laufey

sinopses: you two cuddle at home watching some romcom while a storm is pouring outside.

the rain was pouring hard outside your apartment, a big storm roaming the city while you were alone, trying to watch something on tv to distract yourself from the so close thunders. of course peter weren't home yet from the patrolling, your mind full with worry even tho he was spiderman, he isn't immune to catch a cold. as your mind was full with him, you listen to the window opening and closing almost instantaneously.

sure the sound came from the bedroom, you go towards it, seeing peter completely drenched from the rain. "sorry for the mess, darling" his deep voice like a melody to your ears, even though you literally lived on the same house it still made you flustered. "I'll only accept your sorry if you don't catch a cold, handsome" as you adressed him, he took of his mask, hair disheveled and Impossibly fluffy. you could see the slight blush from your praise, he placed his round glasses on the bridge of his nose and took off his coat and throwing it and his suit on the empty laundry basket.

"can you help me get warm then?" he suggested, dressing some cozy clothes. you giggle, the domestic moment making your heart all warm. "only 'cause you asked so nicely". you hug him from behind but he is fast to turn and hug you back. "bed or couch?" he asks, chin pressed on the top of your head "couch".

you bring a blanket but peter was doing most of the job by lying on top of you, head resting on your chest and arms holding your middle. you two spend a brief time watching whatever romcom on tv until you feel him tense above you.

"what's wrong?" you ask, hand caressing his hair, the scene on the screen was a marriage proposal and you almost instantly made the connection. he didn't reply, so you instigate him. "do you want to marry someday?" at this point you didn't give a shit to the romcom, you only had eyes for peter.

"maybe... do you?" he looks up at you, sounding a bit worried. you could swear he right now was the most beautiful view you've ever seen. "maybe..." you said, looking away with a soft smile on your lips.

you feel him shifting and getting closer to your face, showering your jaw and neck with little kisses, making you giggle. "if i get to call you my husband you will do this every day?" you ask half playfully, holding his face with both your hands for him to look at you.

"more than once a day, doll, i swear" he smiles to you, hand brushing a strand of hair out of your face. "fair enough" you nod, pulling foward his face for a kiss on his lips. "I'm looking foward to being proposed" you tease him, and he starts to get up to do exactly it. "no- no peter, not now" you laugh and stop him, making him lay on top of you again.

#spider noir #spider noir x reader #spider noir x you #gn!reader #fem!reader #itsv x reader #into the spider verse #spider man x reader #masc!reader #spider man across the spider verse

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bountydroid · 7 months ago

Text

Darlin' pt 11

pt 1 / pt 2 / pt 3 / pt 4 / pt 5 / pt 6 / pt 7 (SMUT) / pt 9 / pt 10 (SMUT)

Cooper Howard/The Ghoul x reader

Description: Cooper exposes his jealous side as they find out Moldaver’s location.

TW: swearing, canon typical violence, slut shaming?

I woke up in the morning sprawled across Cooper with a wide smile on my face. He looked so content when he slept, like all the things that had hurt him over the years had never happened. I wonder what he looked like before he turned ghoul. I imagined how handsome he probably was because even after ghoulification, he was still stunning. He must have felt my stare as he slowly opened his eyes and turned his head towards me.

"Mornin', sugar." He mumbled out before yawning.

"Mornin', Coop," I responded, smiling at him before kissing him on the head. "Ready to head out?"

And so, another hike started. I hoped once we found Moldaver we could maybe take a couple of days' break. Honestly, I had no idea how I kept walking after weeks of nonstop hiking, it felt like my legs were going to fall off.

Eventually, we happened upon another town, bustling with life. I didn't try to hide the smile on my face as we squeezed our way through the crowds. I tightly fisted Cooper's tattered duster jacket to make sure we didn't get separated. As usual, he was quiet, he wasn't used to sharing his plans with anyone.

As we approached a small bar, he finally spoke with a stern look on his face. "Stay close, darlin'."

I gave him a small smile in response and happily nodded my head. We slowly entered the tavern, trying our best not to turn any heads. I had no idea if ghouls were welcome here, but considering our past experiences I highly doubted it. As he headed to the bar I let go of his jacket, mesmerized by all the different people I was seeing. Maybe someday I could convince Cooper to stay awhile in a town like this.

"Well, hello beautiful." I heard a voice from behind me. I turned around to see a tall, skinny man with shaggy brunette hair and dark brown eyes.

I hesitated. My first instinct was to tell him to fuck off, but maybe I could get some information out of him so I gave him an award-winning smile before responding. "Hello. Maybe you can help me? I am trying to find out where I can find someone named Moldaver." I batted my eyelashes at him, giving him my best doe-eyed expression.

His eyebrows shot up in surprise as her name rolled off my tongue. He briefly looked me up and down as if trying to ascertain if I was friend or foe. After a brief pause, he asked, "You lookin' da join er?"

I nodded quickly, trying to hide the fact that I had no idea what I was talking about.

"Well," He continued. "Today is ya lucky day. I could take ya to er. We are real close." He boasted. The lie about their relationship was clear on his tongue.

"That's amazing!" I faked amazement, trying to milk his attraction for more information. "Where is she?"

"In da hills." He continued to spill information like a fountain without a second thought. "My name is Roofus, by the way."

I hummed for a moment before responding, "Nice to meet ya." I mumbled while looking around for Cooper. Our eyes finally locked as I found him leaning back against the bar. His arms were crossed and his hat was tilted down, I could barely see his eyes peeking out from behind it. Anger radiated from his form, causing those around him to instinctively find somewhere else to stand. I gulped nervously as I took him in.

"Hey-" Roofus waved his hand in front of my face, catching my attention again. 'That guy scarin' ya?"

'No." I answered quickly. The last thing I needed was for this guy to confront Cooper, but he seemed to have a mind of his own.

Puffing up his chest as he started to make his way towards Cooper's imposing figure and ignored my pleas to stop. "Don't ya worry sweetheart, I'll get rid of im’."

I gave Cooper a nervous glance as I saw him straighten his back and move his hand to rest on his gun belt, suspiciously close to the gun itself.

"Hey. Ya scaring my lady." Roofus accused Cooper confidently.

"Your lady?" Cooper laughed loudly at the thought. "She ain't yours."

"This is Roofus," I said quickly, interrupting their conversation. "And Roofus, this man is my friend." I made sure not to say Cooper's name, knowing how protective he was of it. However, this just seemed to piss Cooper off more.

"Your friend?" Roofus asked, surprise clear on his face.

"Roofus, huh? Stupid name." Cooper sneered.

Roofus prickled with anger, but before he could start yelling at the ghoul in front of him, Cooper interrupted him. “See, I heard somethin’ about a Roofus while at the bar here. Said your movin’ some cargo.” Roofus’ anger switched to confusion at Cooper’s words. “Movin’ cargo for Moldaver.” Cooper finished as he stepped closer.

At the mention of Moldaver, Roofus looked back at my nervous form. “Who da hell are ya people?”

“People you should be afraid of.” Cooper growled. “Now, you are gonna tell me how to find Moldaver, or I’ll rip your guts out.”

Roofus’ hand move instinctively over his coat pocket and the noise of crumpling paper was heard underneath, “I ain’t telling ya shit, ghoul.”

Cooper hummed, his venom turning to amusement as Roofus unknowingly gave him the information he needed. Her location was on that paper in his jacket. “Have it your way.” Cooper said before a gunshot rang out in the busy tavern. I squealed in surprise as Roofus’ body hit the ground. The room went quiet as Cooper belt down to pull out the letter from the dead man’s pocket. I looked around nervously as all eyes were on us.

“Cooper,” I whispered.

Ignoring me, Cooper stood back up eyeing the paper. “Damn.” He mumbled as he studied the hole in it before folding it and sticking it into his jacket pocket.

“Cooper.” I hissed loudly as I saw some people start to get up from their seats, anger clear on their faces.

“Don’t get your panties in a bunch, boys.” Cooper said looking up at the angry men. “Just a bit o’ business, and I got none with you.”

“You better get the hell out of here, ghoul.” One of the men growled before spitting on the ground in front of us.

I knew this would piss Cooper off, so I quickly grabbed his hand and started dragging him to the door. He ripped his hand from my grasp but continued following close behind me. When we finally made it out of the village, I released a breath I didn’t know I was holding. However, before I could register what was happening, Cooper roughly grabbed at my shirt collar pulling me close to him. “What the hell was that?” Cooper growled, staring down at me angrily. “Flirting with other men in front of me? Acting like a slut?”

I squeaked in surprise. Never in a million years did I think he would ever speak to me this way. “Coop, I was just tryin’ to help.” I pleaded, but he wasn’t listening.

“You are MY slut. You understand me? No one else can touch you. No one else can even fuckin’ look at you.” He ranted as one of his fists flew to the hair on the back of my head, tugging harshly.

I gasped loudly at his actions. I never took him for the jealous type, but here he was completely overtaken by it, and much to my surprise I liked it. I pressed my thighs together while I complied, “Yes Coop, I am your slut. Only yours.”

This seemed to appease him as his grip loosened on the back of my head as he pressed his body against mine. “Good,” He hummed. “Never do that again.”

“I wont. I wont ever.” I responded as my hands trailed up his chest and cupped his face softly. “I’m sorry I upset you.”

He studied my face for a moment before pulling away with a grunt. It was clear he was still angry with me. I watched intently as he pulled out the letter from Roofus and read it. I didn’t know it was possible, but his face soured even more.

“Well I’ll be damned.” Cooper mumbled. “I shot right through the damn location.” He said sighing.

“Roofus was the son of an old friend of mine.” He said before looking up at me. “Let’s pay him a visit.”

It didn’t take us long to find the man’s house. As we entered, however, only a little girl was home.

“Well, hello darlin’. Your daddy home?” Cooper asked nicely.

The girl just shook her head in response. Much to our surprise she didn’t seem scared of us. She just stared up at us with a blank expression.

“What is your name, sweetie?” I asked as I bent down to her level.

“Sandra.” The small girl replied.

“I’m an old friend of your daddy,” Cooper said while looking around the small home. “When will he be home?”

“Soon, it’s almost dinner time.” Sandra responded.

At the mention of dinner, my stomach gurgled. My face reddened with embarrassment as I looked down at my feet. “Well, my girl and I have traveled a long way so why don’t you get us some dinner too?” Cooper said while putting a hand on my shoulder.

The girl just nodded in response before heading to the kitchen. I slowly stood up from the ground, giving Cooper a sheepish expression before looking around the home. It was a nice little place. The walls were covered with wood panels and metal sheets, but it was homey, much nicer than the one I grew up in.

As if he could sense my thoughts, Cooper asked, “Remind you of home?”

“This ain’t nothin’ like my home.” I responded quickly as I studied the shelf on the wall. “Much nicer.”

He hummed quietly before sitting down at the table and placing his hat down next to him. I waited there in silence for a bit, the only noises to be heard was from Sandra puttering in the kitchen. “What are you gonna do?” I asked as I sat down at the table next to him.

He studied my face for a moment before responding, “Depends on them, darlin’.” I just nodded while I picked at my fingers. I understood what he meant. Whether he would kill them or not depended on if they complied or not. A feeling of dread settled in my stomach as I thought of Sandra.

Before I could say anything, Sandra returned with two plates of dinner. I looked up at her in surprise at the contents. Wonderful smelling meats graced the plate in from of me, brahman maybe? And definitely some chicken. “Thank you, Sandra!” I said excitedly as I grabbed the silverware from her hands. I can’t even remember the last time I had a meal that looked this good.

Sandra didn’t respond, instead disappearing back into the kitchen quietly. I quickly started cutting up the meat, a grin plastered over my face. I heard Cooper chuckle next to me, no doubt amused at my excitement, but I paid him no mind. He slowly followed suit, cutting up his meat slowly as he watched me. As the brahman hit my tongue I moaned with happiness. After weeks of iguana and jerky, this felt like a meal fit for a king.

The door swung open as a man and a young boy entered the building, a look of confusion on their faces. I ignored them as I continued to eat happily. I trusted Cooper to handle it, but he stayed quiet as well, just staring at the man and slowly bringing the meat to his mouth.

“Sandra?” The man called out only to be greeted with silence. I looked up at him and then over to Cooper who was maintaining eye contact with him. Before he could call out again, Sandra’s footsteps could be heard as she entered the room with two glasses of water in her hands. She quietly put them on the table. Her father visibly deflated with relief at the sight of her.

“Thank you, darlin’.” Cooper said to her before looking back up at the father, “Oh, wait. You thought?...” Cooper said smirking as he held up a piece of meat on his fork. “Come on now.” He said laughing.

“Sandra, wait outside.” The man said, his voice wavering with fear. The girl quickly did as she was told.

“Lead farmin’, huh?” Cooper said, continuing the conversation. “Why, hell, I probably still got some of your lead in me somewhere. But today, I am just lookin’ for information.”

“I’ll tell you anything, as long as you leave us in peace.” The man said. I could tell he was trying to act confident, but his voice continued to waver.

“Say, am I out of date, or did I hear you had three kids?” Cooper asked as he pulled out the letter from his jacket.

“I had an older son, but he’s gone. He took up with that madwoman in the hills two years ago. We haven’t heard from him since.” The man explained.

Cooper smirked as he looked down at the letter, “There’s always some new little faction, ain’t there? Brand new team of believers with their own dumbass ideas about how they gonna save the world. What did you say the name of your eldest was? Was it Roofus?” At the mention of Roofus’s name I instinctively winced, remembering how mad Cooper was at me for talking to him. This didn’t go unnoticed as Cooper’s eyes flickered towards me for a second before returning to the man.

“I didn’t say-“ The man started to respond.

“That must make you Tommy.” Cooper interrupted.

The man looked over at his son before angrily asking, “What did you do? What is that envelope?”

“Well, you see, daddy-o, from what I can tell…” Cooper says clearing his throat. “… Old Roofus got Tommy here mixed up with that madwoman, too. Now according to this. Roofus sent Tommy a stash of caps to pay a courier for the safe transport of an Enclave defector, to that very same madwoman in the hills. Moldaver.” Cooper explained with a smirk plastered across his face.

“Now the problem is, by the time I got this letter off your brother,” Cooper said addressing Tommy, “It was a little bit hard to read.” Cooper held up the letter, peaking his eye through the bullet hole. “For some reason I can’t make out her location.” He looked back over at the father before saying “You really should’ve taught your boy to not play with toys that aren’t his. Maybe you’d still have two sons. Now you give me that location, and I’ll be on my way.”

The man and his son looked at each other before Tommy said, “I’m sorry.”

“Tell him, son. Just tell him.” The father pleaded.

“I didn’t want to spend my life digging through dirt.” Tommy explained. “I want to build something, and we have the chance-“

“Tell him what he wants to know or else he’s gonna kill us all!” His father yelled, interrupting him. “Including your little sister.”

Tommy stared Cooper down. “Huh.” Cooper hummed, surprised by this turn of events. I had stopped eating at this point, my attention turned fully to the men in front of us.

“You should tell him.” I said softly, giving the boy a reassuring look. “Listen to your father.”

Tommy looked between me and Cooper before surrendering. “She’s… she’s at the Observatory.”

“Now please, leave us.” The father pleaded.

Cooper sighed deeply before saying, “So, what you think, Tommy? Am I really walking out of here today, or are you gonna draw on me for what I did to your big brother?”

Tommy’s eyes darkened at Cooper’s words as rage filled his expression.

“He won’t.” The father responded.

“Maybe not today, but someday.” Cooper said, eyes never leaving Tommy. Understanding the threat Tommy reached for the shotgun next to him, but he was too slow. Before I even realized what was happening, Tommy was on the ground, a gunshot through his chest.

“Tommy!” His father yelled as he crouched down over his son’s body.

Cooper stood up and slowly started to collect his things, signaling me to follow. As we passed by the father, I gave him a sad expression but said nothing.

This was just how the Wasteland worked. Kill or be killed.

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@sarahmclean15 @thebumbqueen @i-just-like-to-read

#cooper howard #the ghoul fallout #fallout tv series #cooper howard x reader #the ghoul x reader #fallout

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