#maybe i just feel especially heated because i am. what might legitimately qualify. as a 'woman in film'

[pinkeoni]

click for pretentious film bro ranting

Why do I see some barbie fans (especially on here) create this fake feud between oppenheimer and "film bros" that is honestly only happening from their side. Yes on the most extreme end there people like Ben Shapiro who say wild stuff about barbie and try to detract from it, but I see those kinds of people as not even having a voice in this conversation. Why are you trying to give them legitimacy? And furthermore, why are you grouping other film bros in with that crowd anyway?

It's the alleged "film bros" on twitter who were the ones that was championing barbie the hardest before most current fans even knew that there was a barbie film in the first place. It's because they keep up with film news and were excited that a new Greta Gerwig and Noah Baumbauch feature. The film bros that these barbie fans so staunchly hate are the ones that created barbenheimer in the first place as a way to uplift cinema and to encourage more people to go to the theater. Now obviously barbie did better numbers because it's much easier to market a 90 minute film based on a famous toy line rather than a 3 hour historical film. I'm not saying that you had to have seen oppenheimer to appreciate cinema, and there are plenty of film bros who loved barbie and didn't want to see oppenheimer (I was actually just talking to my old film prof about this, who HATES christopher nolan) and there are plenty of film bros who saw oppenheimer and disliked/didn't want to see barbie, but from what I saw film bros were still encouraging seeing both regardless of how they felt because the point was to get more people back in movie theaters.

When any criticism (fair or unfair) is levied against the barbie movie it's fans will use the "cinema created by women for women should be seen as a important" as an argument against these criticisms, and while I agree with that statement, what angers me about their usage of it is that these specific fans do not actually give a shit about cinema created by women unless it is a multi-billion dollar blockbuster. I do think that Greta Gerwig grossing over a billion at the box office is a huge accomplishment, and I think it's a great film (I gave it 5 stars on Letterboxd and cried three times) but Barbie is far from the only female led project this year, and not even the only oscar contender led by a women. Tell me, did you see Past Lives? Are you going to see Bottoms? Did you know that Molly Gordon made her directorial debut this year? I saw a post that alluded to Barbie and Oppenheimer being the oscar leads this year 💀 I'm sorry, but as much as I love both of these films, if you think the only two oscar contenders of the year are barbie and oppenheimer then I'm going to safely assume that you do not watch movies. Let's wait until the new Martin Scorsese film drops before we start making our oscar predictions, shall we.

If these fans really cared about film then they would not be picking imaginary fights with oppenheimer fans. If these fans really cared about women in film then they would actually recognize and champion some of the many other films made by women this year that does not include multi-billion dollar blockbusters.

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #474

“nothing flashed before my eyes  /  no pretty angels, no bright lights  /  all i saw was the devil’s soul, & it looked a hell a lot like my own”

Who are you most nervous about introducing potential significant others to? My dad. He can be a challenge. He says whatever comes to his mind the moment he thinks it, and it's not always nice. What is the most exciting thing about your life right now? My relationship, honestly. It feels like the one thing that's going right, but I'm concerned if I don't take care of the things that aren't going so well, that they will creep into my relationship and start breaking it down, ex. not having a job. What was the most important non-academic thing you learned in high school? To just keep pushing and not give up on life, and that it is full of phases, be them good, bad, or bland. Have you ever had a job that deeply affected your personal life? How so and do you still work there? No. Do you have a “one who got away”? I don't feel like that anymore. If you were in a supoerhero movie, would you be the hero or the villain? Because I like to help people, I'd like to be the hero, BUT villains are waaaay cooler. If you found a mouse in your house, would you be frightened? Frightened, no. I LOVE mice. I'd of course be startled and concerned about it getting into food, but I'd just calmly find a way to get it outside. Have you ever tried to perform magic tricks? I used to LOVE getting those little magic kits when the Scholastic fair came around! I had I want to say three and was pretty good at a lot of tricks in them. Can you do more with a yo-yo than just "go up and down"? No. What is one form of technology that you wouldn't be able to live without? The Internet for sure. Did you get an allowance, growing up? Why or why not? No. An allowance for three daughters was something my parents couldn't afford. Would you rather go to a water park or an amusement park? Why? An amusement park. They're more exciting to me, and somehow water parks seem dirtier with all the little kids and just alksdjlfa;wjke What is one instrument you wouldn't mind learning how to play? The violin. What's the longest amount of time you've had to wait in line for something? Probably something at Disney World as a kid, idr. What is something that you would like to learn more about? I ALWAYS want to learn more and more about meerkats. What is something that one of your family member collects? Mom collects owl stuff. Have you ever moved to a new school before? If so, how did it feel? No, except obviously when transferring from certain age ranges, like elementary to middle school. Have you ever legitimately forgotten to do homework? Yes, at least once in middle school. I felt SO awful and had to go outside of the classroom to do it while they were reviewing the work. Do you enjoy autumn leaves or spring flowers more? Why? I really, really like both. Each are just very pretty in their own right. Depending on where you live, why might a day of school get canceled? Hurricanes or like the mere chance of a centimeter of snow. At least once, we've even had such a severe heat advisory that school was called off. If you could meet any fictional character from a book, who would it be? Can dragons be real? 'Cuz then I wanna meet Clay from Wings of Fire if we could talk, lol. He's so wise and I'm sure would have great knowledge to share about looking at my life from new perspectives. What are some common places that people tour when they come to your city? Um, people do NOT tour this city. It's trash. What's one food that you did not enjoy as a child, but do as an adult? I'm not sure. How would having no electricity affect your daily routine? Everything would change, given I'm always on the computer. Would you rather have a mermaid tail, a fairy's wings or a unicorn's horn? Fairy wings, for sure. What is an animal that you'd like to have as a pet but it's not allowed? I wish SO badly that opossums were domesticated animals, alsdkjfkaljwe. I say enough that I do want to rescue/foster one, though, but I would obviously need a license for that. I would absolutely never just snag one from the wild. What are some things that you do to make the world a better place? We recycle here, don't dare to litter, and I always try to be a decent person that spreads love and hope to other people. Has the last person you had sex with ever had sex with someone besides you? Yes. What’s your favorite store at your mall? rue21, I suppose. We have a small mall. Have you ever done a workout DVD? Oh my actual god, this is a THROWBACK. When we were really little, my sister had a BARBIE workout DVD that we watched sometimes. Who usually takes out the trash in your family? Usually Mom, but sometimes me. What song are you currently obsessed with? Absolutely "Bath Salts" by Highly Suspect, ahhhhh- When you go fishing, do you make someone else get the fish off the hook? When I used to go fishing, my dad would always unhook the fish. Do you take any prescription meds? A lot. What happens if you don’t take them? I very rarely forget to take my medicine, but when I do, I experience anxiety and my tremors get worse. Who was the last person you dreamt about? I don't remember. Do you prefer your tea sweetened or unsweetened? I hate tea in any way. How often do you honk your horn? I don't really drive, so. I'd be very hesitant to though because I wouldn't wanna piss someone off. Do you have any children? If so, names and ages? That's a hard pass from me, bro. Have your parents ever witnessed you doing something inappropriate? What? No. Did you get babysat a lot as a kid? I don't remember how frequently, but we did have a babysitter. Both my parents had jobs. If you were the principal of a school, what would you do differently? Actually pay fucking attention to bullying and do shit about it. Are you doing anything fun tomorrow? "Fun?" Don't know her. What is something you'd like to receive as a housewarming gift? I dunno. How old were you when you first experienced the effects of puberty? I don't remember. What is your least favorite holiday, and why? St. Patrick's Day because I worry about getting pinched, lol. Pinching even very lightly is surprisingly painful for me. What were some outdoor games you played as a child? Hide-and-seek was my favorite, then my sisters and I made games for on the trampoline and in the pool, etc. Did you accompany your parents on "Take Your Child to Work" Day? I never remember doing that, no. Are cemeteries peaceful to you, or do they freak you out? They're humbling, more than anything. A reminder of how equal we are and that we all end up the same. It's a nudge to cherish life while you have it. Which ancient civilization would you be interested in learning more about? My favorite is Ancient Egyptian. Do you have better long-term memory or short-term memory? Long-term. My short-term memory is absolutely frighteningly horrid. What was the last situation that made you cry? Describe. I was very frustrated with just life in general and how horribly I'm failing at it. Which forest animal would you be most afraid to encounter? A bear, probably. Do you believe in anything supernatural? (ie: spirits, etc) Yeah, like said spirits. Has anyone close to you ever gone to war? No. Have you ever experienced altitude sickness? No. Is there anything, any event, you wish you could remember more clearly? I don't know right now. Have you ever rubbed anyone’s feet? EW you couldn't pay me to. If you had to get advice from someone of the opposite sex, who would you go to? My boyfriend. What was the last new food/drink that you tried? I recently tried jalapeno-stuffed grilled chicken, and a couple days ago I tried this orange/strawberry V8 my mom bought. It was noooot good, which I figured it wouldn't be. That's not a good mix. Have you had a good day today or was yesterday better? Today was fucking awful, and yesterday wasn't exactly peachy either. Have you ever played Sudoku? Yeah, I enjoy it well enough. Do you ever take surveys for money? No; I once signed up for a site like that though because my mom used to do that, but I literally qualified for no surveys with how inexperienced I was and still am with grown-up stuff. Do you like Barbie or Bratz better? I don't have an opinion, and I didn't really as a kid, either. Do you prefer purple or green grapes? I go back and forth, but either way, it has to be a crisp grape or it's just gross. Who was the last person that made you laugh? I was watching a John Wolfe video. Where does your best friend live? Illinois. Who did you last confide in? Girt. Does your car have an alarm? Mom's doesn't. Where was your mom born? New York. What can always make you feel better no matter what? If I'm being completely realistic, nothing. Not every single tactic is fail-proof, especially these days. What is something you’ll never eat again? Why? Crab legs came to mind first. They are SO mushy and just gross. What is currently happening that is scaring you? My life, bro. Have you ever found a stranger’s note somewhere? If so, what did it say? I mean maybe at some point accidentally? I don't remember a specific occurrence.

[nomanono]

#NaNoWriMo - Day1

Haven’t decided whether to post this to AO3, so you just get it here for now <3

Chris grunted into the stiff hotel pillow as the cock slipped out of his ass. The soft thing dripped into his crack but the last thing he minded was the stickiness. He laid there, groaning his appreciation and gratitude, until it started to get tacky on his skin.

The hotel room wasn’t anything special, but it had scent eaters in the corners and the pheromones wafting from Chris in waves were overwhelming.

“I needed that,” Chris said, tugging two anti-scent tissues and swiping up the mess between his legs.

“I know the feeling.”

Chris snorted. “It feels best after a win, right?”

“I wouldn’t know.”

“You did better than me.”

“Still.”

Chris took a third tissue, going to the bathroom and settling on the toilet. He pressed out until the cum started to drool into the pot, and when he’d gotten the gloppiest of it out he wiped again. By the time he came back to the room, his partner was dressed, a stack of wadded tissues sitting on the bed.

“I mean it, though,” Chris said, holding out his hand. “Thanks.”

It wasn’t like he normally took new skaters to his bed. But he wasn’t supposed to go into heat for another two weeks, and this off-cycle spike had caught him unawares - and partnerless - just in time for the qualifier. He didn’t have enough warning to get a blocker. He hadn’t even realized it until he caught the eyes of several scenting alphas roaming over him and realized the seat of his pants was damp. That he’d managed to find someone interested in helping him off was a godsend.

“It’s no problem, really,” Yuuri Katsuki assured him, with the same shy blush he’d had when they started. “Really.”

—

“You going to be okay?” Victor asked Chris a week and a half later. Different hotel room. Same starchy sheets and too-thick pillows. They shared Skate Canada this year.

Chris always skated better when he was in a rink with Victor.

“Yeah,” Chris said, tightening around Victor’s knot. “You still tracking my cycle?”

Victor gave him that cheesiest of smiles: “You smell like you’re seconds off. It’s killing me. I don’t need an app for that.”

“Ohhh, I forgot I shared you on mine,” Chris said.

“Yeah. What was with that spike you had? Did you go to a parlor?” Victor asked.

“Parlor? Victor, please.”

“I know, I know, you have alphas barking down your door at all hours,” Victor smirked. “None are prettier than I am, are they?”

“Never,” Chris laughed. He settled down, pulling Victor with him to snuggle while they waited for his knot to recede. He pressed his face into Victor’s neck, breathed in the scent of the only alpha he ever wanted. He nuzzled and snuffed, wishing he could get high on the heady thickness of Victor’s pheromones. “And their knots are smaller, too.”

“I should hope,” Victor snorted. “I feel bad, you know.”

“Yeah I’m sure you really suffer.”

Victor swatted his side, and Chris just groaned, flexing around Victor’s knot again, feeling another flush of heat in his bowels where Victor was filling him with sterile seed. And even if it hadn’t been sterile, Chris’ implant took care of any eggs that might be floating around inside him.

“For you, mon ami, I would,” Victor purred, nipping at Chris’ neck in return. “Tell me he was small and unsatisfying?”

“He was smaller than you,” Chris reassured Victor. “But I didn’t need much. It was just a little flare up. One of the other skaters —“

“Not Leroy!” Victor gasped.

“That beta? No,” Chris snorted. “Oh —!” He gasped as he felt Victor’s knot tug on his hole, threatening to pop out. “Victor, what are you —?”

“I’m bored,” Victor whined, giving another tug.

“This is why I only sleep with you when you’re rutting, or I’m in heat,” Chris grimaced. “Weren’t you just talking about how I smell?”

“Well,” Victor said. “…. Now you smell like me.”

“Oh, god, Victor, did you mark me?!” Chris cursed, grabbing the pillow and throwing it at the silver-haired skater.

“JUST A LITTLE,” Victor leapt to the defense.

Chris groaned. “Dammit, Victor, you’re supposed to tell me before you do that.”

“I’m sorry!” Victor whined. “You just feel so good.”

Chris sighed. It was a losing battle with Victor. Plus, he was looking at Chris through his bangs, beautiful blue eyes and thick batting lashes. Chris pressed his lips together, steeling himself against Nikiforov’s wiles.

“I’ll stay here for your heat,” Victor cooed his apology, his promise. “Fill you up? Knot you every hour? Mark your whole room? You like smelling me, don’t you, when you’re cycling?”

Did he ever. But Chris was still trying to be upset with him. He looked away, crossing his arms over his naked chest. It was remarkable, how difficult it was to stay mad at someone when the inflatable bulb of their dick was locked inside your colon.

“Just because I like smelling you when I’m in heat doesn’t mean I want you to piss in my ass when we’re casually fucking,” Chris glared.

“Sorry,” Victor frowned, and Chris sighed, because now Victor looked legitimately hurt and apologetic.

“It’s fine,” Chris said. He opened up his arms and Victor swam into them - or as much as he could, given his still-lodged cock. “Just tell me next time, OK?”

“OK,” Victor said. “…I’ll stay here for your heat?”

“Yeah,” Chris said, fingers washing through Victor’s hair. “You ready for it?”

Victor snorted. “I’m your stunt-cock. Your on-call Alpha. Your unofficial fuck boi —“

“That’s not what that means,” Chris groaned, dragging a hand down his face.

“What it means,” Victor corrected him, “is that I’ve got your back. Or your ass. You know. I’m there for you.”

They’d been doing this for years now, and it was true.

“Yeah,” Chris smiled at last, squeezing Victor to his chest. “Yeah I know.”

—

The Grand Prix Final was exactly as Chris expected. Victor on the top of the podium, Chris on his right, just beneath him. <I>Just like in bed</i> Victor always used to wink, until Chris said it didn’t sit well with him. Not that he’d want to be beneath anyone else, but for once in all his years he wanted to best Victor Nikiforov - Victor Nikiforov who was still at the top of his game despite being one of the eldest skaters on the roster. Even Chris was starting to feel old, running out of years he could use to get his gold.

Yuuri Katsuki, the man who’d offered to help, had made it to the GPF too, only to tank - and brutally. Chris didn’t even get a chance to talk to him; he bolted before the sweat of his costume was even dry.

No one saw him again until the banquet. Chris and Victor were on the edge of the dance floor when Katsuki sauntered, ever so intoxicated, to the middle. Katsuki smelled like raw omega ass, powerful enough that the few people in the room with noses for pheromones were bug-eyed as he paraded himself. Chris thought it was rude, not to wipe up your scents when you were done - especially if Yuuri had been with someone in heat. But Victor?

Well, Victor could hardly resist Chris normally. And with that scent in the air? They all got pulled into the wonderful drunken madness of it. Yuri Plisetsky suddenly battled against Katsuki, paso doble and tango and bolero, fighting for a chance to win Victor’s tutelage. Victor ate it up, happily fell into follow position, hung on every lop-sided smile Katsuki threw his way.

Not that Chris was going to miss an opportunity to show off, too.

They wound up almost naked, dancing from the poles near the front of the dance floor to Victor’s brilliant smile and heartfelt applause.

They danced, and they danced, and Chris couldn’t remember how it ended, only that he woke up the next day head pounding, with seventeen new texts from Victor Nikiforov.

—

Chris blinked through his messages from Victor

He’s perfect. I’m going to marry him. How does Yuuri Nikiforov sound?

what are you TALKING about, Chris texted back.

Victor sent three blocks of emojis: smilies and hearts and rainbows and Chris just shook his head.

I’m going to marry him, Victor texted.

you slept with him didn’t you

He wasn’t in my bed when I woke up …but I wouldn’t put it past me

“Neither would I,” Chris shook his head - bad mistake - and put his phone down. He had a plane to catch.

Fuck, he had a plane to catch!

By the time he checked his phone again, sometime in the taxi on the way to the Sochi Airport, Victor’s tune had completely changed.

My life is over

OK wait, Chris texted, because it wasn’t like Victor had a flare for the dramatic or anything. What?

He rejected me

Katsuki?

MY FUTURE HUSBAND TO BE YES

well did you fucking propose to him i would have turned you down too

I ASKED HIM FOR A PHOTO

like a dick pic?

A COMMEMORATIVE PHOTO CHRIS

????

He just looked at me like I was speaking Russian I said it again in English just to make sure I hadn’t said it in Russian AND HE JUST WALKED AWAY

ouch

HOLD ME

seriously?

Facetime?

going through security

The next messages were just an endless stream of crying faces. Chris blinked slow and shook his head. Victor Nikiforov, ladies and gentlemen. Chris’ best friend. His stunt cock. And now apparently the future husband of one very disinterested Yuuri Katsuki.

Chris blanched.

Fuck.

He’d accidentally already fucked Victor’s future husband.

Chris visibly winced.

Maybe it was for the best things hadn’t worked out.

—

Victor was insufferable all through Nationals and into the Four Continents. Whining, fretting, texting at all hours of the night.

“Go to a parlor,” Chris said in the lockers. “You need something new for your nose.”

“I’ve tried,” Victor said. The drama was leaking out of him, and the hollowness it left behind was even worse. Chris frowned. He’d never seen Victor look so … old. Tired. Even as he’d aged, Victor had kept a sense of timelessness about him. He was unstoppable. Tireless. Vigorous. Now his eyes were flecked with distance, his body here but his heart somewhere else. “It’s nothing like him.”

“You don’t even know what he’ll smell like when he’s not… like that,” Chris said.

“I don’t need to know,” Victor said.

“You need to get over him,” Chris said. “He said no.”

“He said nothing,” Victor corrected, but instead of his prior, obnoxious optimism now he simply seemed resigned.

“Come on,” Chris zipped up his jacket. “Stop that. It’s over. You’ve got a gold meal to win.”

Victor grimaced like he didn’t care, but he wound up winning gold anyway.

—

Chris didn’t get many texts about Victor’s Future Husband (tm) after that. He told himself it was because Victor was prepping for Worlds, he’d finally seen the light and gotten over it, but in reality it was because Chris didn’t get many texts at all.

rut’s coming up, Chris finally broke the silence.

Yeah

so?

I can go to a parlor

i’ll come to you, Chris texted. you know that right?

Now who’s the fuck boi?

…. that really doesn’t mean what you think it means

It’s okay It’s so close to Worlds I’ll just parlor

you sure?

Yeah. Thanks tho <3

np, and Chris clicked off his phone, only to get a new video notification:

Yuuri Katsuki trying Victor Nikiforov’s free skate