#maybe I'll become a builder yet

[groovybananablog]

I've decided to try and build a complete save file for myself.. and it's going a lot better than I had anticipated ~

Here's a lil view into my take on Foundry Cove in Willow Creek 🩵

[karizard-ao3]

At fourteen, the pilots haven't matured yet and are going through that difficult period of being teenagers. Can you imagine what Shinji's relationships would be like if they didn't need to pilot the evas and came to know each other for a longer time, like from 14 to 18 years old?

You know, it's kind of hard to picture because they got to know each other due to becoming pilots, so I guess I'll start by putting them in a different setting where they can be coworkers of sorts but without all the trauma.

Okay, let's see. This is also tricky because most 14 year olds these days don't have jobs.

A school club, then?

Lol let's do Lego robotics. They don't pilot mechas. They build little Lego robots and program them to complete tasks. It's like a tiny, non-traumatizing version of the Evangelions.

In fact, Evangelions can be their team name and their chief rival is the Angels. Misato is their advisor, with the help of Ritsuko, who teaches science at their high school.

Gendo forces Shinji to join the club because it will look good on his college apps. Rei, Shinji's cousin or young aunt, was also encouraged to join by Gendo, but they have a good relationship so she's okay with it. Asuka transferred to their school from Germany and believes that she is the superior Lego builder because she grew up in a closer geographical vicinity to Denmark. She has been to the Danish Legoland.

So I think freshman year we can anticipate that their relationships will be pretty similar to canon. They're 14. They're brimming with hormones and irrational feelings. Shinji's got severe daddy issues. They do not function well as a team, particularly him and Asuka. Shinji accidentally befriends Kaworu online, only to discover when they meet in person that he is a memeber of the Angels Lego robotics team. Tragedy ensues.

I remember 15 being an absolute clusterfuck of a year. Like, peak teen angst. So I think they're probably all going through some stuff but maybe this is what starts to bring them together? Not at first. At first they are all real shits, but then I think they might start to develop some empathy and be able to see themselves in each other. It all comes to a head during a high stakes Lego robotics competition they're holding out of town. For whatever reason, they have a lot riding on the line. Maybe we can borrow from the ballroom dancing au and decide that Lego robotics is going to get axed as a school program if they don't start getting some wins (they did really bad the year before). Or maybe they'll lose funding? Anyway. The team bonds when, at the competitions, they each take turns having breakdowns and comforting each other. They begin to learn to work together and realize that team work does indeed make the dream work.

By age 16, they're starting to calm down. One of them gets a car so they drive to get snacks or whatever after Lego club pretty regularly. Shinji and Asuka are starting to figure out how to talk to eachother without triggering Armageddon while Asuka and Rei are starting to do girls activities with each other.

Oh, gosh. This is getting long and my mind is also wandering because it's getting close to my bedtime. Anyway, I think basically they just, over time as their wee little brains finish developing, start to be able to collaborate and see things from each other's perspective and they become a formidable Lego robotics team and go to nationals and then onto worldwide events. Gendo is happy with Shinji for once. Rei and Asuka go on Lego Masters together after they graduate and then Rei gets a job at Lego HQ in Denmark.

I feel like that didn't really answer your question. I don't really know why it turned into being about Lego robots, but here we are. I think, in short, the answer is, they start out butting heads and having conflicts because they are thrown together into a teamwork situation that they are not ready for (and also they are not good at team activities). Over time, they learn to work together and accept each others' differences and flaws. Eventually, they are able to collaborate and kind of learn and grow from each other's influence. They make up for each other's weaknesses by offering up their strengths. I think we get little bits of them trying to learn to work together in NGE but, unfortunately, they don't get the opportunity to succeed because they run out of time and must each face the end of the world almost entirely on their own.

God, I am tired af. I don't even know if I'm making sense. Stopping while I'm mostly ahead.

[platinumaspiration]

well, @brandinotbroke just gave my ego the hugest boost with this tag game! I really shouldn't play this while in a bad mood tho :p

What’s your favourite sims death? I would have to say...probably flies. Never had it happen in my game (naturally), tho

2. Alpha CC or Maxis Match? 4t2 maxis match conversions, because it's gross and ugly :p No, but for real, I like all cc. People put a lot of time and love into what they create/convert/retexture/recolor. I think that should be recognized.

3. Do you cheat when your sims gain weight? No...who does that?

4. Do you use move objects? Yes, kind of have to sometimes!

5. Favorite mod? I had to go into my main save for this one haha. I'd say...all the anti-corruption mods. And to piggy back off of brandinotbroke, ACR! The rest I could probably live without if I could ever sort my folder. Oh, also, one mod I'd really like to give a try is Story Progression by LazyDuchess.

6. First expansion/game/stuff pack you got? First purchased was Christmas 2005. My parents gifted me Sims 2 and then my birthday a month later I got University, I believe. I should show you all the video of me opening it and running off to play haha. First played was, I wanna say Urbz! and Bustin' Out. We would rent those from the video store.

7. Do you pronounce “live mode” like aLIVE or LIVing? Alive. I recently found out my IRL BFF pronounces it as Living. I've known her almost 20 years and feel like I don't know her anymore 😅

8. Who’s your favorite sim that you’ve made? Rhiannon, one of my model sims, but all 4 of my models are my favorite. I really should put Rhiannon as a townie in my uberhood. She deserves a life outside of posing.

9. Have you made a simself? Yes, like 18 years ago lol. Ended up corrupting the hood trying to move me with my 10 same face kids to a new neighborhood. I've really enjoyed the premade sims ever since.

10. What sim traits do you give yourself? of sims 3 traits: absent-minded, light sleeper, brooding, over-emotional, nurturing, workaholic, frugal

11. Which is your favorite EA hair color? TS4's #13 - Honey Blond

12. Favorite EA hair? probably aflongsimple or affuzzylongep

13. Favorite life stage? oh gosh... probably adult in any game lol

14. Are you a builder or are you in it for the gameplay? gameplay, I'll let @plumbtales and @kestrelteens do the building and inspo!

15. Are you a CC creator? I don't think I've created anything myself. I've converted a ton of stuff tho! I'd love to create something, but textures are so difficult for my brain to understand. I commend those who retexture!

16. Do you have any simblr friends/a sim squad? Yeah! Baby Gang! lol, not like we do anything other than play online pvp games and share cc wips

17. What’s your favorite game? (1, 2, 3, or 4) 2 is my ultimate, though I'd love to dive back into Sims 3

18. Do you have any sims merch? Maybe someday @microscotch and I can make something palpable

19. Do you have a YouTube for sims? Not gameplay (yet).

20. How has your “sim style” changed throughout your years of playing? Well, I had dial up internet until about 2010 so... figure that one out haha. But yeah, I was a semi-realistic kind of girl up until about... 2020? 2021? when i made the switch to 4t2. Still working on becoming completely 4t2.

21. What’s your Origin ID? n/a lmao

22. Who’s your favorite CC creator? Oh gosh, there's too many. All my mutuals, I love ya and your cc! Even some people who are not mutuals with me are my absolute favorite. I could never choose haha.

23. How long have you had a simblr? I think I just had my 2 year anniversary.

24. How do you edit your pictures? I recently commissioned the Queen of Renders ™ @microscotch to take preview pics for me while i was out of town lol. She also made me a photoshop template as well. (Go get a commission, she's having a sale right now 😉) For gameplay, I let reshade do the work for me and crop/size it to 700x934

25. What expansion/game/stuff pack do you want next? Brandinotbroke gave the best answer haha. I honestly don't know what kit EA can come up with next

25. What expansion/game/stuff pack is your favorite so far? For Sims 2, probably Nightlife. The first 3 EPs, honestly. Sims 3 has to be Ambitions and Generations. Idk about Sims 4 as most I've played is about 2 hours in Strangerville as the Beakers.

Gonna tag baby gang, feel free to ignore! @microscotch @tvickiesims @lordcrumps @simsisit

thank you again to brandinotbroke for making my day, my week, my month and maybe even my year.

[daman19942]

Get to know you: Sims Style

Thank you to @executables-sims for the tag! Took me a few days, but this was fun to fill out.

What’s your favorite Sims death?

Easy, death by Cowplant! It's so iconic and peak Sims-ridiculousness. That it made its way into future games is no surprise. Plus, I don't have a ton of accidental death in my game, and the Cowplant keeps me on my toes.

Alpha CC or Maxis Match?

Maxis Match as much as possible. I love TS2's aesthetic, even is some of it appears dated. My game certainly looks better in 2023 than it did in 2004, but it is still recognizably TS2

Do you cheat your sims weight?

No, I let it happen organically. Especially because I use Simler90's Slower Fitness Increase and Nopke's Fitness Decay, both of which really make you work for it. They are essential to my gameplay, but mean more of my sims have a high body skill than is probably normal. They are doing their best!

Do you move objects?

Of course. Why it isn't enabled in my UserStartup file is a question I ask myself daily.

Favorite Mod?

I have more than 500 mods so I don't know how I can pick. I could just say NUMENOR in all-caps to say everything he's done. But I'll go with a recent favorite, Nyami's Actual Alcohol Mod, because it adds chaos to gameplay and chaos is good.

Do you pronounce live mode like aLIVE or LIVing?

Living. We are in Live Mode, folks!

Who’s your favorite sim that you’ve made?

In an older prompt, I answered with Daniel Monona, but since then it's definitely been Duke Patricio. I've made him 3 times (in my OG 2000's game, where he married Nina Caliente, in a Base Game Starter hood, and again in my 2020's game). He and Zeeshan are my favorite couple and I'm sad they are so close to old age because I've had so much fun playing them (but I've also been giving them way too many extra days with Elixir of Life or Life Fruit).

Ari is #2, but I haven't played him for a bit because I'm stuck on what to do with him as a Vampire...

Have you made a simself?

Nope, only one of my old TS2 Exchange avatar, which was intentionally not what I look like.

Which is your favorite EA hair color?

Never really thought about this, but maybe black?

Favorite EA hair?

Two male hairs, Rocker and Shortmop. Those two haircuts were iconic in my 2000's saves. Jeanette is my favorite CC hair.

Favorite life stage?

Teens. It's where my sims start to develop their personalities, and I begin to think about what I want them to do. They also haven't fully grown into their facial features yet, so you can get all sorts of good and bad surprises. Plus, they can cause lots of of trouble.

Are you a builder or are you in it for the gameplay?

I still consider myself a builder, even though I play my game much more frequently these days. But I think 400+ uploaded lots in my time playing this game allows me to hold onto that label.

Are you a CC creator?

I guess so! Learning how to mesh and use Milkshape in the last year has radically changed how I see myself in the TS2 community, and has stolen so many days from me (the trial and error of making, and the trial and error of uploading), but its been a very fun skill to develop.

Do you have any Simblr friends or a Sim Squad?

I love my mutuals but I don't interact with other accounts too often. I don't post on a Sims discord or anything. Maybe I should?!

Do you have any sims merch?

I do not.

Do you have a YouTube for sims?

No and I would definitely not have time to produce one!

How has your “Sims style” changed throughout your years of playing?

Loaded question time! For one, my game is much more LGBTQ+ than when I shared neighborhood save files with my siblings growing up. Now that it's my game, exploring different relationships with my sims is one of my favorite parts of play.

I've also become much more Maxis Match as I get older. The 2000's were a wild west for CC creation, and my old saves are bursting at the seams with painted-on clothes and the mid-decade emo aesthetic that I have absolutely no interest in playing in 2023.

Lastly, my build style used to be modern and CFE heavy, but now I prefer traditional (modern works better in TS3) and makeovers.

Who’s your favorite CC creator?

I'll take a historical approach to answering this, because there are many active creators whose work I love, but I also try to preserve the legacies of the original TS2 pioneers. Here are 5:

Numenor - The Modfather. His mods did more to expand this game than just about anyone in the heyday of TS2. If you are reading this, you know who Numenor is. Need I say more? Windkeeper - Probably the best Maxis Match CC of the old era. Her stuff holds up remarkably well. en7en - aka "That Pagoda Guy." Yeah, he's the CFE genius who made the Eiffel Tower and disappeared way too soon. A huge inspiration on my old build style. Ehaught58 - one of the great builders across many different Sims eras. I need to upload some of his old TS2 lots. I wish I could still access his Exchange page because it was a treasure trove. His lots were often huge and unfriendly to old machines but would be fine now. A very recognizable build style (dark woods, earth tones). Daihtnaoz7 - If he did nothing but discover CFE he'd still be a legend. But he also wrote the single bridge, double bridge, and atrium tutorials, demonstrating how to best take advantage of this new cheat. A literal gamechanger. I paid tribute to him here.

Honorable mentions: Cyclonesue (TSR), Hatshepsut (TSR), Tiko (TSR), PiaNouka (Exchange), GoddessByline (Exchange), Wintermuteai1, Minideidad (Exchange), Cireking213 (Exchange, still around as CK213 for TS3 and TS4).

How long have you had Simblr?

I think I made this in Spring 2020. Right as COVID was shutting everything down, I found myself playing TS2 a lot more and eventually discovered Simblr. The old, big sites are either shells of their former selves (MTS), or don't allow TS2 content anymore (TSR), so I figured if I wanted to be active in the TS2 community nearly 20 after the game came out, I had to be on Tumblr.

How do you edit your pictures?

I have a Photoshop action that crops, brightens, and sharpens, and somehow pictures still take me way too long.

What expansion/gamepack is your favorite?

Answering for the first 3 games (as I haven't played TS4)

TS1 - Makin Magic! A perfect final EP for the first game. Though Unleashed was probably my very first EP. TS2 - University (I'm in the minority here, but it's so much fun when you have big dorms or chaotic houses). Seasons is #2 TS3 - Late Night. Bridgeport is gorgeous and the new lot styles were fun and I wish they could be ported in TS2.

Tagging: @katatty @lilakartoffelbrei and @bayoubashsims if you haven't gone yet!

#Tag meme

[hall0wedwyrm]

the only actual humans out of my fankids

Heather, Valentine and Victor!!

Val and Heather grew up incredibly close (bcs Mario and Luigi are very close) so they're essentially siblings. They also grew up with Niko and Nina (bcs Sonic is close with the brothers too (the hc that hes their third brother,,,,,, why does no one use it))

Heather technically has 4 parents. Luigi and Daisy thought it would be fun to be parents together, and they thought reaallly long and hard about it, and they went for it. The two of them are like ... super best friends. Daisy is with Rosalina (which Heather represents by the star earring) and Luigi is with Bowser (represented by the spike and also Bowser badge she wears). She's very bubbly and optimistic, like Daisy, and she's not much of a fighter, like Luigi.

Valentine is the youngest son of Peach and Mario. Since he was young, he LOVED the idea of being a ruler like Peach. He's a little bit sassy, and is incredibly capable of becoming a ruler some day (His oldest sister Clementine is happy being the beautiful daughter who's got an uncanny resemblance to Peach, and middle sister Florentine likes doing various business aspects of the kingdom) due to his strong head and determination.

until.

Victor Robotnik is the protege of Eggman, and also his son. As the new local menace, hes incredibly good at leading a Badnik army. Hes just absolutely ass at making robots... hes like a kid with crayons. Eggman officially takes the role of inventor and builder, while Victor is manager and battle field leader. Hes actually rather successful in his duty of... causing as much damage as possible really.

Valentine and Victor develop... an odd relationship. They are weirdly very into eachother??? but Valentine uses the logical part of his brain and thinks 'hey maybe i shouldn't date my uncles arch nemesis's son' and tries to avoid him the best he can. But its really reaaaaally hard to do that when your cousin is up in his business the moment he steps foot in Central City. (Spoiler; this logic does not last long)

deeeets:

Niko and Vic have a very similar dynamic to Eggman and Sonic from the Fandubs. Vic goes on a tangent and Niko basically tells him to shut up and then beats up his new weapons and leaves.

Victor sees the relation Heather has to Bowser, and he thinks he can get her to join him, but she just laughs at him.

Valentine and Niko made a truce, "I wont tell anyone about Victor, and you dont tell anyone about-" "wait who are YOU WITH??"

Victor really looks upto Eggman and Bowser, but when he learns Bowser doesn't do the villain thing anymore he's a bit disappointed

I think the pairing of Heather and another character is oddly sweet and equally hilarious but i think im gonna do a big post probably named Partner Reveal (mainly because i dont have a reference for Heathers partner yet)

When the four were young, Heather and Niko are the cousins that roll around in the mud together, and if any went on Val he would cry. (he still would)

okay thats all I'll be posting more soon teehee

[humunanunga]

Actually, I'm just gonna go ahead and call it now. @utmvarchive is gonna take a holiday break so I can have more time to finish the Handplates summary and lengthen the queue.

Before I get started on the next AU (in this case, Chronotale) is typically when I catch up on anything found/posted on previous AUs since last archival, and I try to do that in the same order they were first archived in. I'd love to be able to have put them all up in the exact order of creation, but maybe if it's not too late to find all their dates, I could post a timeline at some point.

That said, thanks to recent community efforts to recover it from obscurity, the main AU I'm gonna be catching up next interlude will be Birdtale.

Which brings me to the rest of this post: the elephant in the room.

I'm still waiting to read a translation of the Evernote doc, so I don't know yet if it's supposed to be canon, but I was sent ~30 Birdtale posts, so I'm aware that the creators' art includes frans. It's not the first time I've had this conflict, and looking at the other AUs on my list, it won't be the last, so I'll address this now.

Frans is not a ship I'm comfortable with, and it's not the only ship I'd normally avoid that's shown in some of these AUs... but I also think selective omission would be irresponsible as an archival service. If utmvarchive's intended purpose is to conserve these works before they become lost media, and references to them become missing context, the blog can't always fulfill that role and still represent my own feelings.

For better and for worse, these AUs were influential in the development of utmv as its own fandom. Whatever revisions may follow, I made utmvarchive to keep a record of AUs' original versions and keep track of details that have since been forgotten or retconned. There's probably better ways I could do this, but I'm admittedly an amateur basically doing volunteer work as a hobby. Ideally, everything would be exported to an independent website in case Tumblr closes down, but I'm not an experienced web-builder and can't afford to hire anyone.

Point is, to continue, I've been having to weigh personal boundaries against archival integrity. So far, whenever I caught something in time like portrayals of frans (ex: Echotale), I'd tag posts accordingly and precede the whole AU in the queue with a bolded content warning post in case viewers also want to filter the AU before it comes up. This would be the first instance I can recall, though, in which the alternate Frisk isn't clearly older, which is why I've been especially reluctant this time.

So when I'm back from this break: If I do decide to archive every recovered Birdtale post this interlude, utmvarchive will put up a cw post beforehand, but I hope you'll understand that it does not reflect what ships I myself am comfortable with in my own spaces.

If you unfollow me and mine over this, I'll understand too. It's an awkward and difficult position I've put myself in.

[littleonixel]

I'm new here and I want to know about ur au

can I have a lil info?

have a nice day :3

You also have a nice day/night ^^

And my au(and I'll include ships bc there kinda part of my au -3-)? Well sure

Purple:

•Purple has a negative side of them, I call them corrupt, kinda like a voice, it was caused by his trauma as a kid, and that "voice" pretty reminds them of that quote on quote negative past, and yeah sure he does have happy memories, but Corrupt doesn't really like them, he likes to torture purple with it (sorry Purp)

(the voices were also inspired by @whumpydaydreams 'fanfiction)

•Purple is the type of guy who gets in to fights easily, and has anger issues, but their also a caring person when it comes to friends (Color gang, Mt, hallow heads? Maybe, not sure yet -.-")

•Is a anthophile, which means they like flowers, Alot. And that's why my purple likes hanging out with Blue so much, they also came up with flower nicknames for the color gang and Mt.

•Purple hobbies mostly are reading, planting w/ blue, and probably sleeping (purple is also a tired person due to being a workaholic, Headcanon bc of/from working for Mango)

Second coming:

•As you all know, Second is our tired little bean, but also angry when disturbed in their beauty sleep lol

•Second was kinda aware that they have powers, but not fully; second discovered his powers due to his stress, so during stressing out he suddenly blew out his powers, Of course they were shock, but didn't think anything about, bc he didn't care, he was stress okay?

(fun fact, there's still a hole in their wall after that incident)

•Second met chosen in a dream, that's it, I Know I'm weird

•Their hobbies include, building? Slightly, mostly judges them, fighting and ✨SLEEP✨

Blue:

•Blue, your average stick, has their own little interested, Everyone adores blue, some just don't like that nether wart eating habit

•As some of you AvM fans know that blue is the CG's best cook/hj, even when blue enjoys farming they do still like cooking, it was an interest after farming, he wanted to make something with it, so thus he become the Cg chef lol

•Even some of you make green closer to purple, Blue and purple are much more closer in my au, since both of them share the same interest and purple doesn't mind blue's nether wart eating habit

•Blue's hobbies are farming, cooking, and playing music, and maybe making dru- I mean potions-

Green:

•Mm, yes Green, one of our best Cg singers, he does like discovering things and disturb some sticks in their sleep(mostly Second lmao)

•Even if Green loves the disturbing the other sticks in their sleep, he also sings lullaby to the others when having nightmares, getting lack of sleep, ECT.

•Sometimes Green and Purple sing together, one the ppl in the fandom called them sympathy duo which I think is cute -w-

•Forgot to mention Green's other talent! Building, yup. Basically one of the best builders in the Cg group :3

•Green's hobbies are singing and making music, especially building

Red:

•Red of course love animals, mostly pigs and chickens, quite an animal lover if you ask me ^-^

•Red is also vegetarian, he doesn't really eat meat, but does eat dairy, the only reason why he doesn't eat meat is because they feel bad of killing animals =3="

•I also like to image whenever Reuben from Minecraft story mode, idk why I just thought it was funny

•Red's hobbies are just literally taking care of animals

Yellow:

•Yellow is the scientist of the group, they really like to create to things, from redstone to potions (not just blue)

•He is also one of the sticks who has been staying up all night, to do research, of course which is a result of burnout

•Although yellow is really smart, he can also be a good at times, mostly around red, he does this whenever the sticks feel sad

•Yellow's hobbies are redstone and potions

Ships~:

Secondpurp- Second liked hanging around with Purple, and of course grew on them, soon Purple also caught feeling with Tsc, and second confessed and now they're dating ^-^<3

McDonald's: Red was and always will be a flirt, and for yellow, they of course went with sometimes sees it as a joke, but sooner or later both started to have a crush on each other, and now they're dating B)

Bamboo: Green fell in love first with blue, it was probably because of their kind nature, a caring and kind stick, the more they hung out the they grew on each other, so few months later Green confessed:')

I know this was few days ago, sorry busy with school, but hope you found this informative, and I'll probably do another part for the other sticks ^w^<3

[danganronpa87]

Chapter 1: Daily Life

Another day.

Yesterday... we had learned murder was the only way to escape this place. That we were in some sort of killing game.

I'm sure we all wished it was just a nightmare. But it wasn't.

I still woke up in the same hospital bed, the same chipped red walls around me. I couldn't help but be filled with absolute fear. What if I became close friends with someone... only to discover they've died?

Shaking the negative thoughts from my head, I decided to walk over to the dining hall. Surely, breakfast would be pleasant. I hadn't eaten anything in a while, so I was starving.

I entered, sitting down on one of the many chairs scattered about the four tables in the room. Several other people were here as well. Siandi, Kune, Oakley, and some others that I didn't catch the names of.

"Ah, Sovyak-san."

I looked over, and Siandi nodded her head to me.

"Akiaro is currently making breakfast. Do you like pancakes?"

I nodded. Something sweet sounded good right about now... hopefully eating would take my mind off our current predicament.

Neru came out of the kitchen, wearing a hair net and an apron.

"Food's ready. Come grab a plate and help yourself." He smiled.

"Thank you, Neru." I returned the smile and went to enter the kitchen.

Once I went inside, I saw another boy, preparing plates. The redhead, that was with Neru the other day.

"Zekou, was it?" I smiled, taking a paper plate from the counter.

"Zekou Nakamura! The Ultimate Digital Artist." He gave a warm smile, grabbing some food for himself as he happily bounced in place. Suddenly, his face lit up.

"Chocolate chips!!"

"Huh-?" Confused, I glanced at the pancakes. They were chocolate chip, with white chocolate mixed in as well.

"I knew he'd make them!! He knows I love chocolate!" Zekou's expression was full of excitement; almost childlike.

"Oh, yeah. He loves chocolate." Neru re-entered the kitchen with a fond grin. "He's got a big sweet tooth."

"Ah... I assume you two are close."

"He's my closest friend, so yeah. Zekou's a sweetheart." Neru smiled, glancing at Zekou as he took a few pancakes.

After the two got their share of food, I scooped some pancakes onto my own plate and headed out of the kitchen.

There were several people I still didn't recognize, so I decided to talk with them. I sat down at a table with four others.

"...Sovyak, was it? A pleasure for you to join us." The doctor-looking man bowed his head. His hair was curly, and a soft lavender in colour. He wore a mask, covering the lower half of his face. Underneath a white jacket with many clasps was a green uniform. His green eyes were full of content, behind thin-framed glasses. "Kitsuya Minsaki. The Ultimate Dentist. It is very nice to meet you."

Another boy perked up, being quite a bit shorter than Kitsuya. His hair was greyish-blue, and he wore denim overalls over a black uniform. "...ah.. you. From yesterday..." His voice was quiet.

"He's a bit shy. His name is Daika Sugiyama, and he is the Ultimate Gardener." Kitsuya spoke up for him.

Daika nodded, taking a bite out of his pancake and glancing away.

"Who might you be?" I looked across the table, meeting eyes with a boy wearing a white hoodie. His slick, black hair was pulled up into a ponytail and he seemed to be rather quiet.

"Hmm...? Me..?" He blinked as I said his name.

"...Takeshi Kohima. Ultimate Obbyist."

"Ah, I'm sure you already know who I am-"

He nodded, glancing back at his plate and going quiet. Seems he didn't want to talk...

I made chitchat with a few of the students at the table, including a few I didn't quite recognize.

So many new faces at the table, but I didn't mind getting to know them in the slightest. For our first breakfast together, this was surprisingly fun.

Casia Aiko, the Ultimate Casanova. Charming right off the bat, no wonder she had the talent she did.

Chiyo Takahashi, the Ultimate Chemist. Brash, for sure... but she was serious and down to earth.

Tomiko Miyata, the Ultimate Survivalist. She also seemed shy, but was polite nonetheless.

Kichiro Yamashita, the Ultimate Skydiver. Friendly and upbeat, and made the whole conversation fun.

Sora Suzuki, the Ultimate Hairstylist. She... wasn't the most pleasant person. Vulgar and rude... but pretty witty.

Honoma Ochi, the Ultimate Literary Genius. Fun and easygoing. She also seemed like a ball of joy.

Shinto Kobayashi, the Ultimate Acting Prodigy. He seemed to keep to himself... he didn't seem the most sociable.

Akemi Saito, the Ultimate Builder. Sweet and kind, and soft spoken.

Zekou Nakamura, the Ultimate Digital Artist. Soft and shy, but nice nonetheless. Almost childlike.

Neru Akiaro, the Ultimate Whittler. Seemed to be a big sweetheart. He seemed really nice.

Shou Mouri, the Ultimate Ballroom Dancer. Elegant, yet sweet and kind as well.

Daika Sugiyama, the Ultimate Gardener. Shy, but maybe he'd warm up to us.

Kitsuya Minsaki, the Ultimate Dentist. Calm and collected, and wise.

Kune Hayashi, the Ultimate Blogger. Upbeat and optimistic, even if he was a little overbearing.

Oakley Yokota, the Ultimate Photographer. Shy, but sweet as well. He seemed pretty nice.

Siandi Fukuhara, the Ultimate Traveler. Down to earth, and one of the calmer of the group. Maybe she could guide us through this predicament...

Takeshi Kohima, the Ultimate Obbyist. Shy, but collected... I wonder what he's truly like.

These 17... would be the people I spend much of my time with. I liked them already, they were nice, and positive, despite this... killing game going on... surely, if we all became close, nobody would kill, right? I'm sure we could all grow to trust one another.

After we ate breakfast, we went to go explore the hospital, going in groups of three.

Siandi and Daika came with me.

We stepped into the day room, the same one we were called to once we learned why we were here...

Siandi flipped through various books on the shelves, while I studied the monitor mounted on the wall. Maybe... this would serve as a way to communicate with us...? It was a strange looking device, with knobs plastered onto the sides of the screen.

"Hmm...?" Came a curious hum from behind me. Turning around, I saw Daika, holding a sheet of paper.

"...looks like... student records... a ripped piece from one of the books...?" He muttered softly.

Looking at the paper slip, it seemed to show a bit of Akemi's face, along with her name, talent, and a bit of her personality.

"But which book might that have belonged to? None of these seem to be missing any part of their pages," Siandi glanced at Daika. "Interesting find, however."

"Maybe we should check back with the others." I added.

"Maybe they found something interesting..."

"That's a marvelous idea. I don't think there's anything left for us here." Siandi put down the book she was flipping through and went to lead the way out of the day room.

We headed back to the dining hall, seeing Sora's group already there.

Akemi smiled and waved to us, while Shou kept chatting with Sora.

"Have you found anything interesting? We found a slip of paper that perhaps belongs to you." Siandi sat at the table, sliding the ripped paper over to Akemi.

"Huh-? Looks like... some sort of profile on me or something. Maybe it fell out of a book?"

"We're unsure. I didn't see any books with ripped pages, so we are still looking into it."

"Well... we didn't find anything too interesting... sorry to report." Akemi frowned. "We've been mainly sitting and chatting the whole time."

"Yeah, nothing looked cool so... kinda gave up." Sora was brushing through Shou's hair, a neutral expression on her face.

"...that paper was all we found too... maybe the others... have found something." Daika spoke up.

"Hopefully..."

The six of us continued to chat, losing track of time. Before we knew it, other students had made their way back to the dining hall.

"From what we saw," Shinto started, taking a seat at a table. "We all have rooms. There's also several other places to explore. The day room, where Retku's group should've been. There is a storage room, which my group explored. It's quite spacious. Both Neru and Akemi should like it, there are a plethora of tools and wooden logs. Nothing else seemed interesting to us."

"Ooh! My group! There's a gym! It kinda looks like a place to work out. There's a lot of machines and stuff!" Honoma raised her hand excitedly.

"We also found a pharmacy. Which is expected, we are in a hospital after all..." Neru chuckled.

"There was an operation room, but it was blocked off. It looked like there was a staircase inside." Tomiko reported, looking at the ground.

Siandi shared what we had found.

"I'll keep looking. There's a chance this could be important. Daika found this wedged in between couch cushions, so I'll be sure to check there as well."

Neru smiled.

"Alright, Fukuhara-san. We'll do our best to keep a lookout as well."

We kept chatting a bit more. Seeing everyone happy and upbeat, despite the killing game announcement... it filled me with joy. We were becoming friends. If we all befriended one another, surely this killing game would have nothing on us.

Even if we had to spend the rest of our lives here... I was confident we would take down this game before it started.

There was an audible click, and we hears a familiar voice interrupt the chatter.

"It is now 10 o'clock PM. Please make your way to your rooms, and do not stay in the dining hall after-hours. Anyone who is found going against this rule will be punished."

The monitor clicked off, leaving us in apprehensive silence.

Neru spoke up. "Guess it's time for bed... Zekou, let's go."

Zekou got up and followed him out, and everyone else began to file out after them.

"See you in the morning, Retku." Siandi bowed her head and left.

I headed to my room, feeling pretty good. The day went great. These people were kind, and I'm sure we could all become friends...

I thought about the day as I kicked off my shoes and laid down on my bed.

And soon... a wave of drowsiness fell over me... and the world around me faded to black.

This wasn't so bad.

[wjforever]

Shatter me again. Chapter 41

Leaving books is like leaving your heart. But the thought that I'll be able to return doesn't let me be sad. Hope is living in me.

We head out, and Warner leads me on, concurrently telling me what and where is located. There is a medical wing, he points the direction with his hand, but we'll not visit it, you've already managed to study it the length and breadth. There are the technical rooms, not the most interesting, so we'll skip them too. Laboratory. If you want, we can visit it another time.

Visiting the lab doesn't seem like an attractive idea to me, but it's still interesting to learn more.

"What are you doing there? Are you creating medicines?"

"We are working on a lot of things. And medicines as well. After the system changed, frequent and constant use of medications became unprofitable. It used to worked into the hands of pharmaceutical companies. More pill consumption meant more money for them."

I look at him, almost startled. This is a simple and quite logical thought, but it never crossed my mind. I always believed that the doses and frequency of taking medications had exclusively medical reasons. But maybe I just didn't think about the real state of things.

"It's disgusting," I whisper.

"Well, it's a business. Incomes. Who would refuse money? But now private business no longer exists, the medical and pharmaceutical sectors are completely under the control of The Reestablishment. And it's more profitable for treatment to be rapid and cheap. Many medications can now be used not once a day, but, let’s say, once a month. It's convenient, in a way."

"Especially for those who have poor memories." I mumble quietly, but Warner has definitely heard me. He smiles at me, holding back a laugh, and I answer him with the same smile, feeling a little embarrassed.

"Like this, I believe, it becomes even easier to forget about medications, though. But we have something for these health problems as well, by the way." He chuckles. "The Reestablishment looks for 'magic' pills for everything."

"That sounds like a good thing."

Warner sighs. "I won't mislead you, Juliette. All of this is not done for people. It's just that no one wants to waste time, effort and resources on those who are put out of action. The less time recovery takes, the better. And the main goal of medicines is to use all the resources of the body to the maximum, here and now. Hide the symptoms, reduce the pain as much as possible so that the body can last in working condition as long as possible…"

"Do you hear yourself? Everything you say is just awful."

"I know. But don't worry, your own treatment is the best and safest."

"It's not about me." I'm really outraged.

"And yet, I want you to know that. I understand your concern and surprise, Juliette. Well… this is all new to you, right? You haven't had a chance to learn much about it…"

"I've heard some things in hospitals. I'm not as ignorant as you think."

"I'm not trying to insult you or accuse you of anything. Blame it on those who didn't allow you to keep abreast of things. But yes, the world is cruel. Not much has really changed. People just continue to use each other as before. But now everything all comes down not to finances, but to resources. Humanity has so little vitality left that it becomes an almost impossible task to sustain the lives of those who are doomed."

"And you're fine with that?"

"That sounds not unreasonable."

I hate myself for that, but I agree with him. That's reasonable. No matter how disgusting it sounds. Saving the sick ones, taking resources from the healthy, you risk getting two ill person instead of one. And it will never be beneficial to a regime that uses people as its assets. It's foolish to blame Warner for opening my eyes to simple truths.

I stay quiet and he changes the subject as we move on.

"And there are architects and builders work here. We plan to build new dwellings for civilians, but projects are put on hold all the time due to economy. I have big plans for this issue, but there are few opportunities to implement them."

He tells me more details, and I can't help but ask him questions. I feel his enthusiasm, and I feel excited myself. It's hard to resist this when you see sketches, drawings of projects, layouts, most of which are made using digital technologies that I know nothing about. But seeing three-dimensional holographic projections of buildings and green areas in front of you, which can be viewed in detail, is just an amazing experience.

It makes me think about how little I know about modern technology, how far progress has come while I was living in the four walls of the cell. I haven't learn much while spending my life between school and home as well. Of course I heard something. But now I realize that it's almost nothing, a drop in the ocean. If only I had been taught something like that at school. And I want to know more.

We're back in the elevator, and I'm waiting for us to go to the top floor or to the roof. He said that there is still a lot of interesting things waiting for us. And he guessed right about the books. This thought makes me so excited that I can barely control my emotions. But Warner presses a button and instead of the up we start moving down.

"Are we going down?" I drawl, looking questioningly at Warner.

"Yes, everything that is on the top floor is not so interesting. Therefore, we'll leave it for later."

I'm overwhelmed with such resentment and disappointment that I'm sure it can be felt even outside the sector.

We get out of the elevator, but now Warner is the one who stops.

"Now you the one who doesn't value time?" I really mean it, and not saying it just to answer him the same way he spoke to me. He emphasized that we don't have much time. And everything that has already happened has made it clear to me that maybe I really have something to lose.

"Juliette?"

"What?" I reply with an exasperation that I'm desperately trying to hide.

"What is it?"

"What is it what?"

"You're definitely offended by something."

I'm almost glad he noticed, because I definitely didn't want to bring this up myself, but I'm really very unhappy and offended with him, even though it feels absolutely madness.

"What difference does that make?"

"I'm curious."

"And I don't want to tell you anything." He raises his eyebrows and gives me a strange smile. Maybe because I'm acting like a child again. Whatever.

"We're not going anywhere until you tell me," he says and comes up to me.

I'm suddenly starting to get annoyed that he's so attentive. Why did he have to notice that something was wrong with me? We could just keep moving along the route. I didn't complain and wasn't indignant. Probably, all my emotions were written on my face and I'm almost ashamed.

I have to admit that Warner knows how to drive someone into a corner. He won't budge until he gets my answer. And I'm unlikely to be able to hide the truth from him. Of course, I could dig in my heels, say that I don't need all this, and I want to go to my room. But I would never forgive myself if I missed such an opportunity.

"I just thought you could be trusted, but you proved again that your words mean nothing." I blurt out resentfully, crossing my arms over my chest. 

I really want to be restrained, like Adam or Warner himself, but I can't help it. As soon as Warner asks me a question, emotions break out on their own.

I didn't even know that I was so emotional, that I was so eager to share my thoughts and feelings with others. Perhaps it's just because no one has ever actually asked me about me before, never been interested in my ideas and experiences. Maybe I perceive this as an opportunity? For the first time in my life someone really cares. And I don't want at all to lie to Warner or hide my thoughts, emotions, desires.

Perhaps Warner is right. I'm like a child who blurts out everything that's swirling in my head. And I need to try to grow up as quickly as possible, learn to hold my tongues, hide my true feelings. 

For some reason this is incredibly rendingly-contradictory desire. I feel like I'm in a stuffy room that needs to be aired, and there's a terrible storm outside. So I don't know what to do. To sit in the stuffiness, craving fresh air or to open a window, risking that it'll be smashed or broken by gusts of wind. And I open the window to take a breath of much-needed oxygen, then close it again when I feel that I can't control the elements that tear the casement out of my hands.

There is incomprehension and definitely curiosity in Warner's eyes. Of course, he doesn't understand why I suddenly accuse him of insincerity.

"I made no bones about it."

"Then the question is closed."

"No, it's not."

And of course he's smiling. And of course, he comes unacceptably close to me. It doesn't surprise me at all. I'm even waiting for it, waiting for him to touch me, though he's not in a hurry yet.

"You just didn't keep your promise, that's all." I say simply. 

"What promise?"

I suddenly realize what a stupid game I've started, actually. This is his promise from that non-existent memory, where everything was not true, where there was another person with me. Someone who doesn't really exist. Warner probably doesn't even remember this. He only said that to mess with my head.

"What promise?" He insists.

"It doesn't matter anymore." I shouldn't say him the true if I don't want to look like a complete idiot to him. But it only turns out to be worse.

"Tell me."

Warner becomes so persistent that I immediately remember what attempts to set conditions for him usually lead to. I don't wanna run this play again. Not today. I feel terribly embarrassed and it annoys me.

"Well… you promised…" and I say the rest of the phrase so unintelligibly that even I myself can't understand what I said.

"What did I promise you?" He shakes his head slightly, winces as if trying to discern what I muttered.

"You promised that we would fly." I blurt out with irritation. It sounds so idiotic that I once again regret that I even brought it up.

It's probably ridiculous, but for some reason I decided that if he would took me to fly with him, then we should definitely go to the roof. That would be reasonable, I think. It's closer to the sky, closer to the sun, closer to the clouds. And if you're going to fly, isn't it the most logical thing to do this from the roof? And I've seen what technologies they have, so I was ready to believe that flying is really possible. And I truly expected that we would go upstairs and he would say that he would finally keep his word. But that doesn't happen. Of course, I'm just a naive stupid girl.

"Aah, that's what you're talking about." Warner drawls. He suddenly looks surprisingly relaxed, contented, reassured. It seems he was expecting something different. "Yes. This would have to wait," he says and continues to move ahead. 

I'm walking beside him, feeling an incomprehensible turmoil. Should I believe him or not? But he remembers. At least he remembers his words.

"You were just lying to me, right?"

"No, that's not the point."

"What then? Isn't this the best time?" I squint a little, feeling a shadow of distrust tickle my subconscious.

He smiles briefly. "We can't fly because you're not ready yet."

"Well, mgm, for sure. I'm ready to torture people, but I'm not ready to fly. Naturally." I snort loudly and a smirk flashes on his face.

"You're still very weak.  You need to be in the better condition for a flight."

"And what's so terrible can happen to me?"

I'm waiting for his stupid and ridiculous excuse. Of course, he'll come up with something now, but I've already decided that I still don't believe him, so I'm extremely skeptical. I'm ready to argue with him and tell him how wrong he is. I already fainted in his arms and this didn't bother him at all.

"Well, for example, you can lose the contents of your stomach," he replies.

I feel such sudden embarrassment that my gums start to ache. The thought that I could somehow fly with Warner, I don't even know how exactly, because he never told me the details, and I might throw up… Jesus, I would definitely like to avoid something like this.

He seems to see my embarrassment and continues to lead me along our path, turning the conversation to a completely different topic.

Read my notes and more chapters here AO3

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[kihyunswrath]

I was thinking the same thing, people who both praise Kihyun's abs!!! and say Kihyun need to eat more are hilarious, Kihyun said we didn't need to worry, I'll just hope he will eat enough to be healthy)

Yes, it was so weird to suddenly see hundreds of notes in posts that are drooling over a blurry picture/fancam of his abs, like they suddenly don’t remember he was able to reveal them just because he starved himself. We all have abs, we all can show them with enough dieting. It shouldn’t be this big of a deal. Some people even claimed Kihyun looked a bit awkward while flashing his abs, and guess what, I think he should be. If he’s not a fitness model / body builder, why should his fans even want to see what’s under his shirt? What does it change? If he was wearing a revealing shirt for a performance, I kind of would have understood, but he had to make it a separate event - which kind of emphasizes the weirdness and shallowness of it all...

I personally think Kihyun will be fine. Kpop industry is what it is right now and I’m convinced he knows what he is doing. I don’t think he’s too skinny yet, he was always one of the heavier members, now he’s just similar to Hyungwon, I.M and Minhyuk. I just feel it’s wrong for us to send contradictory messages to them. Some fans are literally asking them to show the abs as if it’s a reward they “deserve”, and Kihyun has indeed been asked that several times before. Then they get upset that he actually takes the hint and starts losing weight. Maybe they would have been less upset if he had just started visiting gym more often (even though that can turn out just as unhealthy), but losing weight is a faster method, plus his only goal was just that - showing us his abs like we had asked him to. He didn’t become buff and muscular, he literally just lost enough weight that it’d be easy for him to maintain visible abs. 

We have a strong effect on him, and we can try to give him different messages, if we’re determined enough. This is not the way to do it, obviously. 

Thanks for sending me an ask tho, nice to see there are people agreeing with me!