#maybe I made this stereotypical for girl's night but i think its cute idk

[cloudishmagma]

@hemlock-haven 's request is done!

Girls Night

A once conversation of hobbies turned into quite the romance talk! Eve and Peony share their love interests with each other while enjoying a warm beverage under a thick blanket.

Peony is such an amazing OC that belongs to @hemlock-haven

Eve is my own OC for BLD

BLD, along with James and Seth are @hotpinkmoon 's creation!

[heavensinhell]

overthinking last night made me think of genshin allogenes but w characters from other fandoms. i'll list them here along w why i picked those for them. ( this is just my opinion !! please respect it ty <.3 )

first—bhna. deku would most likely be an anemo catalyst. anemo because he fights to save people or, in other words, fight for freedom. catalyst because i don't know what else to use for him. maybe polearm? djsjsjaja fuck.

bakugou would be a pyro catalyst, coz like klee, he uses bombs. also pyro's are stereotyped to be passionate. and imo hes passionate about being a hero.

todoroki hmmmm. he'd be more cryo than pyro. yes, he's passionate about what he does like other pyros but i dunno i feel cryo more. also he'd use a sword ( bcoz fantasy aus )

uraraka... anemo catalyst. for semi - obvious reasons.

iida. cryo sword. IDK I FEEL LIKE HE'D BE THAT.

jirou is a pyro sword or claymore. there isn't really a 'stereotype' for weapons so im putting random ones HDHSWJWJ

— so those are the ones ive thought of for bnha so far ^^ i'm semi - tempted to make a fanfic but i'm SOOOO busy ( thinks ) but next—MLPPP

i saw someone saying twilight would be an electro catalyst—i agree in the catalyst part but i think she'd fit more as a hydro or pyro one. first, hydro because she's dedicated her life to her friends and her magic. pyro because she's passionate about both.

rainbow would be an anemo bow, probably with wings too ^^. the song 'no wind resistance' also gave me more to think abt it. also bow because i dunno sobs

applejack would be a geo claymore. she's hardworking w what she does, and claymore because it kinda fits her, being a apple bucker and all

fluttershy would be a dendro catalyst fighting w plants EHDJSJSJ and her talent is 'talking to animals' and animals are a part of nature soooo—thinknt

pinkie pie would be a pyro sword. she really loves parties and cheering other people up so i think itll match her. n id love to see her w a sword sooo yes.

since we have enough hydro catalyst, i'll put rarity as a hydro POLEARM. ( fun fact, kokomi was supposed to be a polearm too but they discarded it ) shes devoted her life to fashion so it fits her

— and thats it for the mane 6 ! before we move on, some honorable mentions ; starlight glimmer, electro catalyst. sunset shimmer, pyro polearm. spike, dendro claymore ty.

up next is pjo for idk just bcoz

percy would be a hydro sword. hes dedicated to keep his family and home safe and cozzzz hes son of poseidon. sword because thats what he already uses.

annabeth is a dendro or anemo sword. i feel like dendro because their archon is the god of wisdom and anemo because her mother is related to the god of the skies.

grover... dendro catalyst <.3

ill give jason electro polearm tbh. i mean his dads the god of lightning im pretty sure. n hed look cute w a polearm

leo is hispanic bennett and hes a pyro sword ty. ( SOBS IN FESTUS )

piper... i feel like she'd be a dendro polearm. i dunno but i feel like she fits in with the power of nature.

hazel would maybe be geo sword. sword because thats already what she uses, and geo because—i mean the girl controls the ground what am i supposed to think

nico is a dendro catalyst imo. i feel like ghosts would be a part of nature. no idea why but its just. that.

i might add more later but thats all i can think of for now! if you read up till here ily

[startwithbrooklyn]

THE GREAT ND REWATCH OF 2021 / OCTOBER 3, 2019 // the trial

(TW SUICIDE)

it's the reveal!!!! love that for her hope shes thriving (shes not) again w the two minutes of the next episode to sync the dates

-lmaoooo so i honestly wonder why they went for the full pulling-it-out-the-throat thing but idk (an interesting foil to her getting sick for more stereotypical reasons ie s2 "people find out theyre grandparents every day"

-I LOVE THIS GEORGE HAIR

-"i'd do anything for nancy" okay but....why 👀bit of an odd reaction imo

-bess with spilling the truth again 😂and gets shot down. tragic #shetried

-wait sooooo nobody tested the fingerprints on the knife when this shit happened?? or that tech didnt exist in 2000? i mean without a body how could they even call it murder? and who told the police?? like if the drews took the baby, the dress, and said nothing, who tells the cops shes missing or even dead? how did they know to search the bluffs? who told the media/public? it had to have happened that same night because ryan said when he got there later there were already rumors she was killed. after the baby and bloody dress, only her crown, a knife, and tire tracks were left. how did anyone find anything at this remote bluff without some kind of tip off? and why on earth would they think murder and not suicide with so little evidence?? thats gotta be like suicide central, sorry for the trigger

-"a little help, lucy?!" lucy seems unable to disobey a direct request from nancy (ie "lucy, stop" from later in the ep) when nancy speaks directly to her. so maybe if nancy had spoken aloud/engaged more lucy could have appeared more? nancy said she only comes around when she wants to but what if nancy herself could do a bit more, being the last thing lucy touched and all

-so in ep 2 when nancys in jail carson says "great grandma rosalind buried her valuables in the trunk" including the knives shown here. did carson and kates families even know about nancy? how did they explain not announcing a pregnancy or birth?

-"oh." john lmfaoooo

-BESS lmaoooo and ace's looks in the background and then at seeing nick approaching lmfaooo oh no / also why on earth is she apologizing?? he dumped her but she has to be sorry he found out she fucked someone else? someone nicer pls explain to me bc i dont get it. she dont owe him shit

-george is SO CUTE lmfaoooo and so forward and he was so shook but then he was like "oh hell yeah"

-"is he a vampire?!" ik nobody i knew got that reference 😂

-this entire search of the claw is a sham. what are they even looking for. clearly a set up by tamura but why/what does he suspect them of. esp w karen as accomplice, story should be airtight so why are they still investigating?

-john + ace dream team 💙

-god ace is such a yes-man. why is he so fucking loyal?? people like him are insane. how are they real. i suspect they arent. and no matter what you do you are never worthy of their unending loyalty anyway.

-so in the Good Place nancy was the one who had the key but in reality its ryan

-wonder if lucy's listening to ryan here talking about his love and grief for her

-"you were throwing away your future on a nothing girl" - nancy & ryan - their fathers dont want them to see "troubled" kids, want them to focus on school instead --> which they both struggle with and eventually do not achieve (maybe bc they want their kids to leave horseshoe bay?) for nancy its an interesting vice for someone whos really a goody two shoes/for ryan its subverted bc karen actually did worse than him ie committed real crimes

-"stay away from my family" surprise bitch bet you thought youd seen the last of me 😉

-interestingly, ryan probably would have agreed with karen about switching the ballot boxes but he wouldnt have really understood the social consequences. both josh and karen are determined to see ryan as the bad guy when actually he didnt do anything, they did. 🤔

-karen is such a ride or die friend. again w the loyalty. if someone swapped ballot boxes for me i'd be touched. im sure going into active labor made lucy a bit upset but damn. what a friend.

-wonder when nancy starts calling her "Lucy" instead of "dead lucy"

-lucy primarily haunting her own house/love seeing this house overtaken by nature

-the concept of writing things down : starting from the first ep, nancy's journal (then and now), writing out simon cards, similar cemetary cards in the Good Place, "beautiful minding it," culminating in lucy's journal / writing it down to help figure it out/when theres too much going on to keep it inside

-"i'll make a salad" NICK LMAOOO

-wonder what happened to carson's old lawyer?

-"my testimony begins in the summer of 1999" because your story always starts with your mother's story

-lmfaoooooo this shit taking the stand is soooo never allowed but oh well

-"she stole a knife" and carson's face lmfaooooo he knows its not true but what could he fucking say?? no?

-"i love you mom, i hope you never find this." ironic bc nancy didnt want her dad to find her journal either

-lucy never wanted anyone to find out how she died d/t shame- but she didnt want carson to go to jail for it so she finally allowed it (or just couldnt refuse nancy asking)

-"i'm sorry for what you lost"/"i'm never gonna be free from them"

-awww ace/mcginnis goodbye / i wonder if ace is nervous thinking about tamura --> ace's dad since chief mcginnis covered for ace out of respect for his dads sacrifice but tamura would throw both ace and his dad under the bus just to get at nancy (get at her via ace? since he was already used as the blackmail plot device? they kinda touched in this in s2 but not fully)

-okay sooo why are they still doing this forensic analysis thing? like the whole things over so whats the point. i wonder if john had packed up and gone home what coulda happened

-nancy/carson - interrupted moments:

•family dinner interrupted by nancy's accsations

•being home after finding ted interrupted by carson's arrest

•celebration of dropped charges interrupted by nancy discovering the truth about her parentage

-"i cooked your favorite to celebrate" ironic bc shes upset that hes not her "real" dad but he IS because he knows her best. like theyre literally proving it right in front of her. vs ryan whom she doesnt really want anyway AND rejects requests to get to know her. like come on sis. his 20 years of parenting you arent going away, ever. deal w it.

-carson's little smile before he said "'mom never hurt lucy" like he knows this is the end / scott's acting here just kills me

~~~~~~~~~

-why did the drews come back at all? and why did kate really keep the dress? carson says she did it as a link to lucy, but did kate want to keep it to be connected to lucy? or did she bury it to keep lucy repressed? is this a positive or a negative? +keeping in attic - did lucy start to haunt kate, so she unburied the dress?

and lastly:

-why doesnt lucy haunt everett and celia hudson? she kind of does ie painting but only when nancy visits bc shes actually haunting nancy. isnt everything the hudsons' fault?

[luuxxart]

GIVE US THE NEW WARRIORS HEADCANONS UR REDESIGNS ARE AMAZINGJAKMAKWJDKSL💖💖💖

aaaa omG thank you!! :’D I’m actually strangely attached to these characters so I’ll try to do my best to explain the design choices I made and everything

ok so here we go.

SCREENTIME

* first off

* Not an entirely bad name??

* I would prefer Worm tho as a reference to the Morris Worm

* And I did make his design a little more wormy. Kinda Doc Ock-ish.

* So his tragic backstory... Well. Long long ago... when he was just a little kid... his dad fucked his mom.

* Jkjkjkjk. But it would be better than fucking “internet gas.”

* To take this in a darker route, I think it would be cool if his grandad had been experimenting with creating cyborgs and turned his dad into one. And then turned Screentime into one. So Screentime escaped sort of half-finished and is just trying to help others who might mirror his situation of abuse.

* I like to think his first superhero story was he was just like fucking buying bulk ramen and then hears a dude harassing a girl in the next aisle over and is like. huh. word. guess I can intimidate this guy by threatening to take his fucking social security and make it public knowledge.

* Bc he can hook up to the internet and updates his database frequently so he can just Mr. Robot people.

* He’s probably like 18 or 19. Never was schooled and college is kinda pointless when you have the whole internet in your brain.

* So he’s just living in a rundown apartment. Payin bills by doing odd jobs and doin bitcoin stocks.

* On the battlefield, he’d definitely be a mind games kind of guy, but he’d also use his worm limbs for dexterity and could probably discharge bursts of electricity at the cost of losing some information in his database.

* Also it’s probably really hard to tell, but Screentime is my favorite out of the original designs.

TRAILBLAZER

* again! Not a bad name at all!

* Made me think of fire though... and hiking... so

* We really don’t have much information on these characters so they were kinda fun to play around w and I think she was my favorite in terms of concepts.

* Also what the fuck are those red things on her head am I just fucking dumb???

* They look like devil horns. So I’m gonna run with it.

* Ok so she got a backpack from a god.

* Well that god was a god of Hell and also her godfather. Her actual father was another god of Hell. And idk how gods really work in the Marvel universe?? But I think there’s probably at least some high-ranking demons of Hell. I think Hell exists??? If I remember Doctor Strange correctly? (Maybe not Doctor Strange... bro everything is so hard to keep up with)

* Anyway, her dad was killed by some hero traveling through Hell at some point probably. And so she’s been preparing since to go avenge him.

* Then she gets to earth and is kinda like... well, avenging can wait.

* And the reason she can’t just get anything she wants out of the backpacks is because the backpacks are alive. But over time as she gains their trust, they start to become more and more useful. So, like magikarp to gyarados.

* her outfit was so fucking hard to redesign. like,,, I still don’t like it. The backpacks and stuff yes. Everything else no. But it’s better than the Neon Nightmare.

* Her powerset shouldn’t be limited to just her backpacks though. I saw a lot of people complain about that. Bc anyone could steal them from her and use them?

* So I think she should have superhuman strength. Also, her backpacks should only respond to her command. It’d be cute if they were also kinda cheeky about it. Bc yeah she’s a spoiled little brat. But she’s their spoiled little brat so they’re not opening up for anybody but her.

* She’s defo the youngest of the group

* Even if she is an immortal demon kid lol

S

bro I can’t even say it

I’m renaming them Shuriken. Effective immediately.

SHURIKEN

* So Shuriken is non-binary. Which I think is really cool! They’re not the first non-binary character that Marvel has,, bc Loki exists,, but while they’re not a good step forward... they’re a step forward nonetheless and I kinda commend them for at least trying.

* But goddamnit why did they have to go and name them S

* Sn

* please don’t make me say it

* So Shuriken has ice powers that are sort of threatening to take them over. Like if Iceman couldn’t control his powers ig. Their powers sort of came to them mysteriously in the middle of them already having a gender crisis and high school is happening and all that blah and now they’re just like,,, so ,, “superheroing seems to be a good venture right now. Maybe I’ll find myself in heroics and forget about everything else”

* And most of the heroic ideal is on their brother, ,,,, uh,,,, Quarterback,,, who idolizes the “classic” heroes like Cap, Iron Man, and Thor.

* Shuriken prefers reading news stories about Night Slasher and Punisher, Jessica Jones, and just generally, the other edgier heroes.

* But because their brother idolizes heroics so much, it makes it sort of a surprise when Shuriken takes up their mantle before Quarterback realizes anything is going on.

* And how does the ice stuff affect them? They’re sort of on the fence about finding a cure and whatnot. Most people speculate its like later-in-life mutation, but Shuriken isn’t satisfied with this answer.

*they sometimes chop off the spiky ice parts for convenience(they have no feeling in the frozen over parts of their body)

*(I’m toying with the idea of them having a crush on Ms. Marvel ngl)

QUARTERBACK

* not much to say about him? Other than goddamn that neon was terrible.

* Also I’ve seen jocks wear pink, so some youtube dudes complaining about that can fuck off. Maybe not that bright of a shade?

* But I figure with a defensive character, you would definitely want a bulkier frame. At least Power Man levels of a bulky frame? Like I’m not talking Hulk or Thing. Just.. yknow. At least a good Cap size dude.

* Also a blockier costume would make sense. Since he’s supposed to be. Uh. Safe. For people to like,, crowd behind. Like a safe

* Like a safe sp

* Like a

* safespace.

* I also like to think he was sort of a stereotypical jock and then here comes his little sibling (by like,, 7 minutes) who’s finally just like “yo fuck the gender spectrum” and so he finally opens up to his own interests that he’s been burying

* Like the color coral

* Which is definitely not pink my dudiest of dudes ;)

* He’s definitely more

* CHILL

* than Shuriken about the whole ice taking over his body thing. Like, at the end of the day, he’s still a jock even if he did turn out to be a mutant. Like , the world didn’t just end because he’s got some cool ice powers

* Also only being able to create a shield if it’s for others?? What a fucking joke man come on

* He can create platforms of ice and just mainly uses the ice as shields.

B-NEGATIVE

* OK THIS IS MY SON

* not the original he kinda just looked like he took one look at Welcome to the Black Parade and said “I can do that outfit. But crappier.”

* Listen,,,, I constructed a son

* It’s like that thing from that movie

* I was like

* “We can rebuild him...”

* is that fucking robocop

* At any rate, yeah yeah, Morbius stuff is still withstanding

* What if

* And hear me out

* His parents were sort of antivax sort of anti-mutant sort of folk. They get into some sort of car accident when he’s kinda young. He gets a blood transfusion against his parent’s wishes and in the end also gets adopted by this weirdass doctor who probably has some nefarious purpose, considering he used Morbius’ blood in the first place.

* This would explain how he could survive having vampirism since a doctor would probably have easier access to donated blood and stuff.

* Should the blood be going to people who actually need a transfusion? yes, however, this doctor is clearly ,, off his fucking rocker and corrupt as hell,, and what is his purpose?? The world may never know

* I don’t think B-Negative cares about anything. Like he just seems like that kind of character? Totally and inherently aloof and selfish because he’s just been fed blood on a silver spoon his whole life?

* Just does not care

* He does care about music though. Specifically rock(alternative, punk, hard, etc) and the history of it.

* me personally I really like Pink Floyd and I’m not going to,, shove my beliefs onto a character but

* I’m going to shove my beliefs onto a character and say his favorite song of all time is probably Welcome to the Machine

* And he probably will not shut up about how righteous of a song it is and how pertinent the message is

* Bc I think it fits,,, a lot of things about the stuff I’ve wrote with the backstories of these characters

* and yes

* he can perfectly mimic Great Gig in the Sky. the man!! has pipes!!!

* I also think it would be cool if he’s the oldest of them? Like, younger than 21 but he’s out of high school. Just trying to get a bachelors in music history at fuckin uh. NYU probably.

* he unironically likes twilight

[the-trth-untold]

now its ur turn. do all of the sweetheart asks.

god jsjsjhdjk im just letting u kno these answers r gonna be BORING but hhhh THANK U 

1. Talk about your first love.

i’ve never been in love, never been in a relationship before. BUT i can vaguely remember my first crush back in 2nd grade. all i can remember was that his name was kyle and he was the only boy who ever spoke to me and my brain just went !!! 

2. What’s the most beautiful song you’ve ever heard in your opinion?

Break My Heart Again - FINNEAS or What Was Our Love All About - Adrian Milanio and Marylou Villegas 

these are just two that i can think of there are A LOT of beautiful songs

3. How’s your heart feeling right now?

fine??

4. What kind of self care is your favorite to do?

i dont really do any self care things?? 

5. What’s your skincare routine?

i dont do any skincare routines either... ik im a monster

6. How did you get to be so beautiful?

u must be blind if u think that 

7. Do you have any stuffed animals?

i used to have over 50 stuffed animals, i would always place them all over my bed neatly but i got rid of them now :( 

8. Best trip you’ve ever been on?

Myrtle Beach, SC because it was my first vacation spot and i was so happy seeing two dolphins close to the shore

9. Favorite thing about your room?

the color of my walls and blankets lol mint green and peach colors

i dont have anything cool in my room

10. Opinion on love?

i mean, it’d be nice to experience it some day and i hope i do but right now im content being by myself

11. Are you affectionate?

if i know you very well i can be, if not im very awkward and will barely make any eye contact with you

12. Who do you look up to?

i look up to people who have struggled a lot in their life, people who can be optimistic in any situation

13. Favorite poet?

i dont read much poetry, but i loved reading some things Emily Dickinson has published

14. Song that makes you happy? How about one that calms you down when you’re in a bad place?

honestly any disney song makes me happy! im a huge disney nerd and listening to any of those songs makes me feel nostalgic.

when im in a bad place, any slow, ballad sounding song can calm me down

15. Do you play an instrument?

i played the flute in middle school but dropped it after less than a week LOL

16. Do you do art? Using what (pencil, watercolor, etc)?

i like doing digital art but im not good at it and i dont have adobe illustrator anymore so i haven’t done anything recently

17. Do you dance? What style of dance?

i cannot dance and no one will make me

IM TOO EMBARRASSED EVEN IF IM ALONE HAHAHA

18. What’s your zodiac sign? Do you believe in astrology?

im a libra

i somewhat believe in astrology, i know there’s more to it than just your sun sign and there are different placements that make you different from the stereotypical traits people use for each sign

a lot of the “things about each sign” can be used for anyone because the responses can be very vague and many people can relate to 

19. Favorite old film?

too many

the shining, the breakfast club, carrie, pretty in pink, etcetcetc

20. What’s your hairstyle?

idk its a mess

curly/wavy and i have hardcut bangs 

21. What weather is the most beautiful, in your opinion?

fall weather, where its like 50 F (or 10 C for all u weirdos out there), cold enough to put on a flannel and boots

22. What upsets you most about the world?

i only have two hands but there are so many cats and dogs. i cannot pet all of them. (IM SORRY THIS WAS UR ANSWER DASHA BUT IM KEEPING IT ITS SO CUTE AND FUNNY AND I RELATE)

23. Are you in love right now?

no

24. Do you have a crush? If so, talk about them!

i dont have a crush lol

25. Do you have pets? Talk about something sweet about them!

yes!!! i have two gorgeous puppies!!! if u wanna check them out u can follow my instagram i post them all the time @ the.moon.atomic

they’re such dorks but they fit my household idk how to describe it they just belong in my house hahha

26. Do you have a lucky number?

i dont really believe in lucky numbers 

27. Have you ever wished on a star? What about on a fallen eyelash?

no, and i never heard about wishing on a fallen eyelash haha

28. Do you believe emoji spells to work?

no???????? i dont even know what that is

29. Do you believe in magic in general?

no

30. What’s the most beautiful thing in life, In your opinion?

when people finally stop hiding their true selves, show their real smiles, and laugh so hard they snort 

idk i just love people, well, most anyway sjsjhzjdsk

31. Opinion on the color pink? What about baby blue?

love them 

theyre such pure colors and they just remind me of newborn babies hahaha

32. What instrumental sound is your favorite?

piano definitely

33. Do you like the sound of wind? What about the sound of rain?

yes! yes to both! i love rain more though, sorry wind

34. Who makes you happy?

my friends, family, and my mutuals 

35. What makes you happy?

listening to music

36. Imagine your ideal life, the life you wish to make, what will that look like?

ohh well i’d be living on germany for starters hahaha

id like to have my own house, maybe living with a best friend

definitely like 5784538902 cats and dogs, i love them 

at some point id like to have a relationship LOL

37. Do you wear makeup? If so what’s your favorite type of makeup or specific makeup product? Favorite store to buy makeup? 

only on rare days ill put on makeup, i only use eyeshadow, liner, and mascara and ive never gone to a store thats just for make up, i just go to a pharmacy lol

38. Do you wear dresses? If so what’s your favorite dress you own?

only if i absolutely have to, the dress i wore for my senior pictures is my favorite

39. Ever been heartbroken? How do you deal with it?

noo, ive never been in a relationship 

40. Who’s your closest friend? What do you love about them?

i kinda really dont have one, not irl anyway

@neo-bangtan @mini-pretzel are my closest friends online, i love everything about u guys

41. Introvert or extrovert?

introvert

42. Do you like MBTI? What’s your MBTI?

im isfj

43. Would you be a fairy, a mermaid, a vampire, a siren, or an angel?

uh idk?? i wouldnt want to be immortal so 

44. What’s the best song a friend has ever introduced to you?

acid jazz singer - the fratellis 

45. Parlez-vous français?

no my french sucks

46. Most beautiful place you’ve been to?

honestly i cant think of any place pennsylvania sucks ahhaha

47. Where/when do you truly feel at home?

home...... my bed...... LOL

48. Does smiling put you in a better mood? Try it right now, you’re smile is gorgeous!

only if im not looking at myself lol

49. Favorite shoe you own?

slip ons or my new balance 

50. Can you walk in stilettos? Do you like them?

N O i am so accident prone i can barely walk barefoot without tripping 

51. Do you feel loved?

kinda? sometimes?

52. How do you express love to those you care about?

just giving them a hug lol or saying i love you

53. Favorite term(s) of endearment?

no ones ever called me any but i like baby, im a simple girl 

54. Most romantic thing someone’s ever done for you?

nothing?

55. When is the happiest you’ve ever been?

meeting new people who share the same interests 

56. Are you happy right now?

im pretty neutral atm

57. What makes you smile?

really awful jokes that ARENT EVEN FUNNY AND TALKING DASHA AND KARINA 

58. Do you laugh a lot?

i guess??

59. What’s your favorite kind of aesthetic?

soft vibes i guess haha

60. Do you want to marry for love or for some other reason (like money)?

i dont see myself marrying but if i would it would definitely be for love

61. What would your dream wedding look like? Do you want to get married?

i dont really want to get married, most of the time it ends in divorce and theres just a lot of paper work and its a hassle i dont see a point in it 

62. Favorite flower?

hydrangeas 

63. Favorite artist?

edgar degas

64. Favorite music artist?

bts lol

65. How kind do you think you are? Is kindness important to you?

i try to be kind to everyone, i dont know if others perceive me that way but i think kindness is very important to me

66. Ever made a playlist for someone?

once and i loved it, pls ask me to make a playlist for u

67. Do you have anything you do to physically comfort you when your sad? Such as a favorite blanket? Or a relaxing bath?

music and a soft blanket 

68. Early bird or night owl?

early bird

69. Morning routine?

wake up, look in the mirror, look away from the mirror, go back to bed. (AGAIN THIS IS UR ANSWER DASHA BUT IM KEEPING IT HHAHAHAHA)

70. Night routine?

shower and watch netflix until i fall asleep

71. What is the most lovely quality a person could have in your opinion?

being humble

72. Do you cry often? Does crying help you get the emotions out? Do you feel better after?

yes yes and yes

im such a cry baby i will cry at everything if u yell at me or if disappoint u im so sensitive 

73. Do you like hugs?

yes but i dont receive many hugs

74. When was the last time you kissed someone?

never

75. Are you small or tall?

small, 5′4 or 164cm

76. Do you like wholesome memes?

who doesnt

77. Favorite thing about the past?

anything that makes me feel nostalgic 

78. Do you ever wonder about the future?

yes

79. Have you ever lived in a different country than you currently live in?

nooo

80. Do you like plane flights? Airports?

ive never been on a plane

81. Sunrises or sunsets?

sunsets

82. The beach or a forest?

beach

83. What time of day do you tend to be in the best mood?

when im sleeping lol

84. Do you push yourself to act together and in a good mood even when you aren’t?

i try to 

85. Favorite kind of tree?

what kind of question is this i dont know anything about trees

86. Do you care about the health of the Earth?

i want to but i dont do anything for it

87. What did you like most about your childhood, if anything?

fieldtrips in school

88. Do you read a lot? What’s your favorite book?

i try to read more, my favorite book is more happy than not 

89. What are you most nostalgic for at the moment?

disney, i just put my christmas tree down and the ornaments are disney characters

90. What’s your favorite personality trait you have?

honesty i guess?

91. List at least ONE thing you love about your appearance.

my eyes

92. When was the last time you truly felt calm, without much of anything to worry about?

after i bathe 

93. Do you worry a lot?

yes all the time

94. The dazzling lights of the city or the relaxing countryside?

dazzling lights of the city

95. Ever changed the shoelaces on one of your shoes? For what reason?

no 

96. Favorite pastry?

??????????? i dont know??????????

97. Do you like doing little acts of kindness?

YEAH

98. How’s your day/night going?

fine so far, i dont have to work today so im just chillaxing 

[ravennest1342-blog]

BTS Fanfic Recommendations

Ok, so I don’t know if it’s considered weird to hype up other people when you write fan fiction and basically turn the attention away from yourself but IDK because I’ve been dying to share all my favorite fanfics with you guys! I hope you enjoy this, most (if not all) of these will be on AO3! A few will be from here, here being Tumblr. I’m such a dork, omg don’t look at me! But read! Read these beauties and leave me be!!!!! 😂Also, I’ll be putting warnings beside the ones that have smut/BDSM/or anything else that’s weird. A lot of these will have smut because for a long time I was really insecure about writing smut so I tended to read books that advertised it in order to know what the hell I was actually writing.

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The Songbird and the Sea

Author — MissterMaia (follow her on Twitter she’s actually hilarious and I love her)

Pairing — Yoonmin, with side Namjin and Taekook.

Rating— Mature (there’s smut in this so tread carefully)

Description — In a world where dominance of the sea is an endless battle between pirates and mariners, Park Jimin is content living in his little village on a small, uninteresting island by the eastern mainland. He wants nothing to do with the bloodshed of good and evil, the heartless killing of both innocents and condemned, the constant establishment and disruption of order. What he wants is peace, to live his life in the same town he was born in, to spend his days in the beautiful forest, and to use the powers of his Blessed Rune to nurture the home he loves so dearly. But when his island is attacked by pirates, Jimin will have no other choice than to do as they command and leave all thoughts of peace behind in favor of boarding the Agust, a pirate ship captained by the infamous Min Yoongi, Black Fox of the East.

My thoughts — omg, where do I begin? God this book was so beautiful. The character development! The plot! The ROMANCE! AH! It was such a perfect work of art! I never felt bored like at all and normally I get bored pretty easy on long chaptered books like this! She’s also getting the book published! (With different character names obviously and it’s like super edited.) I don’t know what else to say other than GO READ THIS!!! SHE IS THE QUEEN OF YOONMIN!! YOU WONT BE DISAPPOINTED!!!

Hidden Omega

Author — LadyPrussia

Pairing — Namjoon Centric

Rating — Explicit (there’s smut in this so tread carefully)

Description — At 21 Namjoon still hasn't presented leaving him as a dud, with the BTS pack having their own issues and not treating him like a real member a tragic event forces Namjoon's body to present as an omega. Is it really too late for BTS to win Namjoon's heart? Or will one of the 4 other packs steal it instead? Or maybe a darkhorse will appear.

My Thoughts — this book is great! Not only is it super long (over eighty chapters) and still being updated, but the character development is super refreshing. Forewarning though, the author has said that there is a good chance Namjoon won’t end up in the Bangtan Pack but a different one, and originally that made me upset, but with the way she painted the story I actually don’t care what Pack he ends up with; their all beautiful and it’s an amazing book! Lots of drama and angst for you angst lovers out there!

No Spell can Cure Shyness

Author — MissterMaia (seriously — I love her)

Pairing — Yoonmin, mentioned Namjin, Side Taekook

Rating — teens and up

Description — Yoongi really doesn’t expect the witchboy who sent him an accidental text to be the prettiest boy he's ever seen in all his life. Or the nicest. Or the kindest. Or just the best in every possible way. Painfully shy and (un)smooth as he is, Yoongi decides the best way to approach this Jimin person is in the form of a cat. A cat who can't talk. Great plan, Yoongi.

My Thoughts — The FLUFF!!! I can’t even begin to describe how much I love this book! All of this woman’s works are masterpieces that need to be appreciated! Yoongi is so shy it’s hilarious and he has the most extra reactions to like everything — and and I LOVE!!! YOU need to read it! Stop whatever your doing and go read it!

Saltation

Author — momora

Pairing — Yoonmin, side Taekook, and Namjin

Rating — explicit (there’s smut in this so tread carefully)

Description — Jimin had grown up watching his mother sort the point-oh-one percent beta defaults into the alpha-omega communities, but that doesn't make being a part of the statistic much easier. He'd be doing okay at this new omega thing if that watchful alpha Min Yoongi could stay out of the situation. He just wants to settle into his new life and finish his useless degree already. Instead, all hell breaks loose.

My Thoughts — This book is the one of the best a/b/o fics I have ever read in my entire life! Alpha’s and Omega’s live separate from Beta’s due to different instincts and Jimin was born in the beta community but presented as an omega. And it’s really funny because He keeps slipping up and doing/saying things that leave everyone else kind of like (0.0) The writing is fantastic! The characters are absolutely riveting as is the plot and the AUTHOR KEEPS TEADING ME ON TWITTER ABOUT HER NEXT UPDATE AND HOLY HELL IM BREAKING DOWN OVER HERE!!!

Jammed

Author — minverse

Pairing — Vmin, side Yoonseok, maybe Namjin?

Rating — explicit (there’s smut in this so tread carefully)

Description —The rational part of Jimin's brain screams at him to remember what his mother said about strangers and vans. But the rational part of his brain is no match for really bad whiskey and Kim Taehyung. ((au where Jimin gets stuck on the interstate in the middle of a blizzard and Taehyung lives in a van))

My Thoughts — this book! *wheezes from laughter* is so funny! Jimin is trying to make it to Yoongi and Hoseok’s wedding (which he is kind of dreading because Hoseok is trying to set him up with his own best man) and he gets stuck in a blizzard and boom there’s Taehyung! A renowned author that decided to live in his van and travel the world while writing his new book. This book was so funny you guys! I was dying, there was a smut scene and it was pretty great. The whole book was phenomenal and I loved it so much. Because I have literally no self control I’m gonna add a sneak peak.

NU ABO: A Memoir by Park Jimin

Author — decompositionbooks

Pairing — Jikook

Rating — explicit (there’s smut in this so tread carefully.)

Description — The world didn't think it was necessary to give him a guide when it shoved all of these omega hormones at him, so here it is, Park Jimin's handbook on dealing with heats, unrequited love, and Jeon Jungkook.

My Thoughts — this book was so good! Omega’s are really rare and Jimin is so against the stereotypes put on omega’s and he is CONVINCED that Jungkook thinks of him as a tiny child that needs protection and he’s such a little ball of rage and god it’s so funny and he’s so sarcastic and furious that he’s being forced into this cutesy image (that he refuses to admit he likes) and it’s so cute and hilarious.

In Your Eyes

Author — TrappingLighteningBugs

Pairing — Jikook

Rating — Explicit (there’s smut and light dim/sub in this so tread carefully)

Description — On nights where everything seems against him, Jimin wishes he could take Jungkook down a few pegs.

My Thoughts — I originally read this because I was trying to expand my view on what a dom!Jimin would look like for my Bunny Breath book but I actually really liked this a lot. The characterization was good, it wasn’t like most smut oneshots where the characters go at with like literally no push and seems to be mildly dubious consent. This was well thought out and I enjoyed reading it.

A Sheep in Wolf’s Clothing

Author — blimpish

Pairing — Junghope

Rating — Explicit (there’s smut so tread carefully)

Description — When Jeongguk decides it's time to live out his fantasy of being knotted, he determines that Hoseok is the best (read: least awful) candidate for the job.

My Thoughts — I read this book because I’m a hoe for Junghope. But it’s really good! I remember feeling mildly dubious about it until I got to this really funny scene when Jungkook (a beta) asks Jimin (an omega)if he knows any alpha’s that wouldn’t be weirded out bu having sex with a beta and Jimin’s just like “I know three but your not gonna like it.” And after that it’s a hilarious conversation of them deciding which of their friends would be the least cringe worthy for Jungkook to sleep with. Jimin admits that Hoseok is great and it goes from there. BUT THERE IS A PLOT LINE!!! ITS NOT JUST SMUT!!

Unfamiliars

Author— themarmalade

Pairing — Yoonseok (my library is mostly Yoonseok.)

Rating — Mature (I can’t remember if there’s smut and it’s a long book so I don’t want to go read through all of it. Fuck I totally will but that’s beside the point. Read the tags when you click on the link.)

Description — Hoseok rescues a kitty in a summer storm. Thanks to some weird magic, Yoongi is that kitty. In a tiny apartment full of plants and moonlight, a simple, aching happiness blooms. But with what Jungkook knows, how long can the happiness last?

My Thoughts — this is so cute! Yoongi is just minding his own business when he accidentally steps into a warlocks spell pentagram and gets turned into a cat by Jin, he positively freaks the fuck out runs away, gets picked up by Hobi and things go from there. It’s so cute and soft and ima go read it BYE!!!!

Bad at Love

Author — shooky__bear

Pairing — Yoonseok with side Namjin.

Rating — Explicit (there is smut and definite don/sub so tread carefully.)

Description —Yoongi was pretty sure he was straight. Pretty sure (And not remotely interested in love or Jung Hoseok.) Alternatively ; that fic where yoon thinks he's straight and he's a bit of a slut and keeps fucking girls tho he likes hoseok and seoks a Patient Loving Gay who waits and Supports yoon through his Gay Crisis.

My Thoughts — this book is full of so much emotion and general truth. I love it so much, I cried several times when reading and admittedly geared up at the end. Hoseok was so sweet and patient and he had to literally teach Yoongi that it was ok to trust him and crap now I’m crying.

Take Me to the Edge

Author — Nasobem

Pairing — Yoonseok

Rating — Explicit (there is smut and Don/sub undertones so tread carefully)

Description —Yoongi takes a pointed step backwards and glares at "Hobi". "What the fuck kind of name is that," he says, "and don't touch me." Namjoon makes a funny noise. Yoongi ignores it for the sake of eviscerating "Hobi" with his stare. It seems to be weirdly ineffective. Or Yoongi is hired to work Tech Support and Security for Jung Corp and it'd honestly be pretty chill if it wasn't for this one obnoxiously handsome dude whose life mission it seems to be to bother Yoongi until he breaks.

My Thoughts— I love this book. Yoongi is such an angry little bean and Hoseok literally just wants to make him happy — the Maknae Line are little shits but what’s new there? This whole book is amazing. I wish I could find a good Vmin/Vhope/Minjoon/Sugakookie book like this. *cries*

Our Burned Bridges

Author — tendershipping (nothing about her ships are tender! *sobs*)

Pairing — Vminkook (she’s the Vmin queen)

Rating — Mature (no smut but brutal themes so tread carefully)

Description —Agent Jeon Jeongguk is given a cover story and assigned to guard amnesiac Kim Taehyung. (Taehyung has nightmares most nights after he wakes, at first. He screams and cries names Jeongguk doesn’t recognize, always one in particular—Jimin.)

My Thoughts— I’m, I’m so EMOTIONAL!!! I read it and was a literal mess halfway through and IT JUST GOT MORE DARK and *chokes* Vmin we’re MARRIED and enter Jimin who seems so bitter and mean and sarcastic but he’s really just broken and angry about things and — go read this. It has a happy ending to so win win.

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

I have been so active tonight shit. Idk why. You know what. I’ma wait till tomorrow to upload this.

Is it tomorrow? It’s tomorrow. Have fun with this wonderful list of my FAVORITE FANFICS (only the Songbird and The Sea is my favorite lol)

[clownmoontoon]

I'm interested in watching Osomatsu-san, but I have a few questions, if that's ok. 1. Sub or dub? 2. How do I know who's who? I already know some of the easy ones, thanks to you. Thank you in advance! (P.s. Thanks for telling me about BNHA!)

ITS A REALLY GREAT ANIME AND IT HAS SOME OF THE BEST CHARACTER WRITING I HAVE EVER SEEN. IT IS ABSOLUTELY ONE OF MY TOP FAVE ANIMES EVER

HOWEVER

idk how old you are (or the age of anyone possibly reading this) so i feel i should say Osomatsu-san has a lot of mature themes and is CLEARLY meant for a more mature audience of the adult/college age/MAYBE later teen variety

all the main and most important side characters in the show are at least in their 20′s.

im not recommending this show to kids is what im saying haha

its nowhere near as wholesome as hero aca

ANYWAY ONTO YOUR QUESTIONS

1. Sub or Dub?

as of right now there is no dub Viz Media, who most recently did the redub of sailor moon (AND ITS FANTASTIC BTW SO IT GIVES ME HIGH HOPES FOR MATSUS), had sent out a tweet saying that the dub was going to be released some time in October of this year but …nothing happened?? my buddy @arr-jim-lad even contacted them about it, and they responded that there were no updates to mention. ://///SO right now sub is all we got haha

ITS REALLY GOOD THO SO ITS NOT LIKE A NEGATIVE OR ANYTHING BC THESE VOICE ACTORS ARE AMAZINGdef my fave voice actors of any sub ive watched (and ive watched quite a few)

2. How do I know who’s who? I already know some of the easy ones, thanks to you.

one of my fave aspects of this show is that after a few eps, despite them all having the same face, it becomes VERY EASY to tell them apart haha this is part of why the character writing is so strong imo!

but here’s a few tips and tricks to look for just in case you cant tell right away!

🌈COLORS!!!🌈

❤️Osomatsu -  the eldest of the sextuplets and the show’s namesake - RED

💙Karamatsu - 2nd eldest - BLUE

💚Choromatsu - 3rd eldest - GREEN

💜Ichimatsu - 4th brother - PURPLE

💛Jyushimatsu - 5th brother - YELLOW

💖Todomatsu - 6th and youngest brother - PINK

the easiest thing to get the hang of first when it comes to noticing the matsus is def their designated colors! Even when theyre not in their trademark hoodies they can usually be seen wearing their colors somewhere on themselves so if you cant tell who’s who right away LOOK FOR THE COLORS!!

if theyre all wearing matching outfits you can look at their hair shinies bc they’ll usually be their color when nothing else is! (tho those are a bit more subtle in coloring bc ..well..shinies haha)

😄EXPRESSIONS and QUIRKS😎

each of the bros has a standard neutral expression, and some of them have fun quirks that make it very easy to tell who’s who! lets start backwards this time \(ouo)/ (mostly bc from the start the youngest bros are def easiest to recognize…besides karamatsu ofc)

this got quite long so check under the cut for all the bro details and fun collages i made for each bro bc i love this show too much! \(>u

💖Todomatsu (pinky boi)💖

he’s the designated “cute” boy, and the worst/best self-centered millennial stereotype. actually a total mean girl in disguise, and (according to his bros) a “vile monster”. i love him and he’s a cute demon. not the worst bro but pretty darn close.

neutral expression: :3voice: highest pitch of the bros and often whiny quirks: - can usually be seen w his smartphone - acts the most feminine (covers his chest if naked or topless)- always has eye shinies - two hairs sticking out on the top of his head - calls all his bros “niisan” since he’s the youngest

next up MY BOOOYYYYY

💛Jyushimatsu (YELLOW SUNSHINE LIGHT OF MY LIFE)💛

the hyper-active, forever smiling, incredibly powerful, baseball boy! if something weird and crazy is going on jyushimatsu is either directly involved or about to be. he’s always laughing, smiling and making weird jokes/noises. a very sweet boy who is entirely too powerful. He often dresses as animals, and is used as an “attack dog” to torture whichever brother he’s commanded to (usually oso). A very unpredictable boy to say the least. Its hard to imagine an ooc version of him bc there isnt much he would not do or say.HE IS MY FAVE BEST SUNSHINE BOY

neutral expression: 8Dvoice: lowest pitch of the bros but also the loudest, often making weird/nonsensical sounds/noises such as: BBBBOEHBA!! 8Dquirks: - often goes cross eyed - is incredibly strong, can lift and throw his adult brothers like nbd - never has eye shinies in the anime unless he’s about to cry - wears shorts when everyone else is wearing pants, also some times wears a traffic cone on his head- wiggly arms and sleeves too long (even when its not the hoodie, usually his sleeves are always too long haha)- only one hair sticking out on the top of his head

((MANY THANKS TO @arr-jim-lad​ FOR THE TILTED PIC IDEA ITS ADORABLE))

next up my second fave, NEKOMATSU

💜Ichimatsu (purple cat man)💜

the designated darkmatsu, ichi is the slow moving, constantly slouching, quietest boy who thinks cats are way better than people. the least motivated matsu, even going out to do fun things (like drinking or gambling) is some times too much trouble. for him a good time is laying on the floor and thinking about death (and also cats). a fan of torture, if the situation calls for causing trauma he’s suddenly very talkative and plays w his voice a lot. he is the second brother (after my boy jyushi) that is often called upon when one of the other brothers (or anyone) needs to be tortured. i love this boy and he is good to my fave boy god bless suujimatsu

neutral expression: B(voice: usually very low, slow and monotone quirks: - eyes always half lidded, no shinies - always slouched- messy hair (some times w cat ears)- only bro to wear track pants (w the line on the side)- has a diff cat in his lap almost every ep, but does not actually own one- two hairs sticking out on the top of his head

up next everyone’s fave otaku,

💚Choromatsu (green frog weeb man)💚

the resident brother mom and a total idol otaku, choromatsu isnt concerned w much else besides his idol obsession and proving he’s way more responsible than his brothers. he often walks todomatsu to the bathroom at night and waits for him to finish since youngest bro is scared of the dark (reminder theyre both grown men in their 20′s). he thinks he’s better suited to be the oldest brother and leader rather than osomatsu and even points it out once, with agreements from both todomatsu and ichimatsu.if anything crazy happens choro is the first to scream about it not being ok. he’s got the strongest will of all the brothers and can never be persuaded to change his mind about a situation. he’s not a fighter at all and usually chooses to stay on the sidelines even if he agrees w whatever the bros are fighting about (killing god for instance).he’s under constant stress bc he’s pretending to do his best while his brothers are terrible i love him give this poor green man a vacation

neutral expression: :voice: higher pitched, not as high as todo but still higher among the bros, and usually using it to yell @ brosquirks: - smallest pupils, no shinies (in the anime)- usually has a worried expression- wears plaid a lot- is irritated almost all the time - wont look for a job bc he’s determined to be an idol manager- no hairs sticking out on top of his head

AND NEXT MY THIRD FAVE AND EASILY THE MOST BEAUTIFUL MATSU

💙 KARAMATSU 💙

LOOK AT THIS BEAUTIFUL MAN, THIS PAINFUL ADONIS OF MATSUS!! IS THAT A GLITTER CROP TOP THAT DOESNT COVER THE CHEST?? IT SURE IS!! ARE THOSE JEAN BOOTY SHORTS?? YOURE DAMN RIGHT THEY ARE!!!

karamatsu is EASILY the most recognizable matsu. w those amazing eyebrows, constant use and abuse of anime eyes, wild variety of glittery, revealing, and leather clothing its no wonder he’s called painful oh my god i love this man DID I MENTION HE SPEAKS RANDOM ENGLISH FOR NO REASON AND ITS GREATalso he’s probably the most caring brother who genuinely wants his brothers to be happy and know theyre loved very much by him ;;

if you cant immediately spot this matsu i dont know what to say to you tbqh

neutral expression: >:Dvoice: he makes his voice deep to sound cool p much all the time but its actually higher pitched than it seems quirks: - wears sunglasses, skulls, a leather jacket, sparkly everything, and p much anything he thinks is “cool”- easily the most expressive matsu just look for those eyebrows haha- puts his finger under his chin a lot - “BURAZAHS” - "heh!”- two hairs sticking out on the top of his head

and now on to the final, the oldest, and arguably the worst matsu

💔Osomatsu💔

THERE HE IS!!!! THE TRASH KING BROTHER!!!!i kid, i kid sort ofimplying that the matsus are not all trash boys is just a joke tbqhfor me osomatsu was absolutely the hardest bro to recognize when i first watched the show, and i think the biggest tip i can give for him is just to look for the red boy scratching under his nose. also the boy who looks like he would buy and sell you. he’s a pretty brilliant con man and a good fighter too, but his laziness outweighs anything that he could possibly achieve in. he’s absolute trash but in a way still lovable?? OH ACTUALLY if youre familiar w the anime Lupin the Third just look for the brother that makes the most Lupin-esque faces he’s got that classic-anime-comedy-male-lead look more than any of the other bros so that might help you recognize him!

could literally be lupin’s little bro haha

neutral expression: its like a stretched version of this :3 w teeth showingvoice: higher pitched, he plays w his voice almost as much as jyushimatsu, very playful and teasing, hardly ever serious sounding quirks: - scratching under his noise- obsessed w money and women (and never has either)- the most addicted to gambling of all the bros (this is sounding less like quirks and more like serious problems omg), favors horse races and pachinko- the “leader”, usually the one telling the others what to do (even if they rarely listen)- calls no one “niisan” since he’s the oldest - two hairs sticking out on top of his head

WOW THIS CAME OUT MUCH LONGER THAN I MEANT IT TO!! if im not careful people might think i love these trash neets or smth oh no

but ye! i hope this helps! or was at least an entertaining read haha❤️💙💚💜💛💖

[chinxino5-blog]

yeet

tagged by @fayfictions​ thanks b

Rules: answer these 85 statements about yourself, then tag 20 people

Tagging: whoever wants it?? idk man im not good at taggin people, it makes me way nervous - also throwing this under the cut bc its long as FuCk

Last

1. drink - milo

2. phone call - my mum lmao letting her know i was going to my friends place

3. text message - best friend (hannah)

4. song you listened - i think it was TiO or Pony or something from my friend’s playlist [it’s called ‘slut it up’ i think that explains enough]

5. time you cried - ...er.... maybe a little over a week ago? i think? not sure

6. dated someone twice? - same person? nope

7. kissed someone and regretted it - lmao yeah

8. been cheated on - nope

9. lost someone special - no one i needed

10. been depressed - depressive episodes/moods

11. gotten drunk and thrown up - nope :p

fave colours

12. crimson/dark red

13. baby pink

14. burgandy/really really dark purple-y red

in the last year have you…

15. made new friends - yes! lots esp on tumblr ^^

16. fallen out of love - never been in love

17. laughed until you cried - a lot :)

18. found out someone was talking about you - negatively and positively yes

19. met someone who changed you - hm... not by heaps... maybe a little?

20. found out who your friends are - yes, real friends

21. kissed someone on your Facebook friends list - i dont kiss people ;w;

general

22. how many of your facebook friends do you know irl - dont use facebook

23. do you have any pets - a fish named physh!

24. do you want to change your name - i want to change my last name; wanna take my mums maiden name

25. what did you do for your last birthday - stereotype-themed party!

26. what time did you wake up today - 6:15

27. what were you doing at midnight last night - sleeping, surprisingly

28. what is something you cant wait for - get more piercings, dye my hair, start nursing, finish my fic, start a new fic; theres a lot i want to do in the future

30. what are you listening to right now - the sound of my laptop whirring

31. have you ever talked to a person named tom - err over a discord? no one i know well

32. something that’s getting on your nerves - people at school (its been literally 4 days)

33. most visited website - you’re on it right now

34. hair color - blonde~

35. long or short hair - pixie-cute short!

36. do you have a crush on someone - nope, this bish dont get feelings

37. what do you like about yourself - my writing and my hair tbh?

38. want any piercings? - i want two more on my right ear, one more on my left, a septum, maybe a lip (maybe two lip) and possibly a tongue piercings but idk

39. blood type - no clue

40. nicknames - on here? chinx, chinxy/chinxi. irl? gracie, graciegrapes, G, lesbian, gayce

41. relationship status - single

42. zodiac - gemini~

43. pronouns - she/her

44. fave tv shows - teenwolf, end of the fucking world

45. tattoos - i want them 

46. right or left handed - right

47. ever had surgery -  broke my hand

48. piercings -  ive got my firsts, seconds and a helix on my right

49. sport - right now, only horse riding lessons and gym/running. i quit netball and soccer last year

50. vacation - err ive been to bali and new zealand

51. trainers - i dont know what this one means

more general

52. eating - nothing

53. drinking - nothing

54. i’m about to watch - probs nothing

55. waiting for - a cute girl to be gay and to like me and to be likeable 

56. want - ^^^ + just generally to be happy

57. get married - when im old enough

58. career - nurse

59. hugs or kisses - kisses 

60. lips or eyes - eyes

61. shorter or taller - shorter

62. older or younger - younger

63. nice arms or stomach - stomach

64. hookup or relationship - dream? relationship. most likely? hookup

65. troublemaker or hesitant -  hesitant

have you ever

66. kissed a stranger - no

67. drank hard liquor - nope

68. lost glasses - sunglasses, but not prescripted ones

69. turned someone down - uhhh inadvertently by being gay lmao 

70. sex on first date - im a chILD

71. broken someone’s heart - if we’re gonna be dramatic, sure

72. had your heart broken - nah

73. been arrested - noooo

74. cried when someone died - yes

75. fallen for a friend - what are FEELINGS

do you believe in

76. yourself - on good days?

77. miracles - yes 

78. love at first sight - no

79. santa claus - no

80. kiss on a first date - yeah if you’ve known them before been dating? if its first time properly meeting/hanging out probs not

81. angels - yes

82. best friend’s name - hannah <3

83. eye color - kinda change between blue and grey

84. fave movie - ooooo spirit: stallion of the cimmaron 

85. fave actor - who doesnt adore emma watson im SO GAY for her

[punkscowardschampions]

Ali & Carly

Ali: ⚰ knock knock Ali: do i need to get the ouija out Carly: yea Carly: tho bit late to ghost the lad in my bed Carly: idk who he is Ali: 🤠 put on a disguise Ali: like whomst Ali: beats having to leave your own gaff Ali: tho it is a crime scene Carly: got love bites from my arse to my elbow Carly: is he a vamp or what like Carly: i taste good i kno Carly: [sends photographic evidence] Ali: bitch Ali: are you anaemic?! Ali: leech sounds more like it but is he sparkly with good hair Carly: bitch its too early for words i cant spell wtf Carly: he is sparkling but thats my shine ha Carly: the hair is a no Ali: low on iron, probs, i'll get you some iron tablets Ali: taste like blood, don't tell your bedmate, he won't wanna leave Ali: party's over n sharing ain't caring Ali: someone's feeling herself this morning Ali: here for it Ali: I've already been left so that's a no to me Carly: party only ended when i passed out a few hours ago Carly: so yea Carly: was fun Carly: baby no come over Ali: was whilst it lasted for me too but you know Ali: duty calls Ali: you sure Ali: don't wanna break it up if you're good to go again Carly: yea Carly: not scared to go hard on site cuz garda are to come around Carly: i am but hes snoring Carly: & boring Carly: come Ali: perks Ali: check he's not bumped his head Ali: they'd have to come if a normie went missing Carly: nah he has to go before he goes for a slash in my bed Carly: lads are ming Ali: want me to forward that to lene Ali: make her day Ali: steal my girl Carly: do Carly: never seen her party before Carly: weird Ali: Yeah Ali: she can hang but Ali: you know, other shit on her mind Ali: work being one of 'em Ali: thank god I ain't working today Carly: & i cant get a job Carly: ha Carly: can get rid of this boy easy tho Carly: hold on Ali: another skill for the CV Carly: yea Carly: better not have knocked me up Carly: not cute Ali: Umm Ali: you need to go to the pharmacy Carly: theres so much shit on the floor i cant tell whats us & whats party Carly: idc Carly: idk Carly: ill ask him Ali: Lemme know Ali: if I could pick it up for you I would Ali: guess I can, put on a oscar winning show for the nosy bitch in there Ali: Ma will die Carly: ha Carly: its k he wouldnt have gone near me w out Carly: quoted Ali: what a prick Ali: better not be there when i show up cunt Carly: hes leaving Carly: screaming him awake will do that like Carly: ha Ali: what he get for passing out 🤷 Ali: coulda shaved his eyebrows off like Carly: next time maybe Ali: get out the sharpie and all Ali: now it's a party Carly: need your artsy talents tho Carly: me just hold up i need my baby Ali: you got it covered babe Ali: i believe in you Carly: aw Carly: i gotta clean me & this place need belief Ali: how long are your rents away and are there enough stragglers we can rope in Ali: twatface not included, bye Carly: idk but yea theres lads everywhere Carly: mattress is covered Ali: 👏 Ali: put 'em to work Carly: while i lie here k Ali: hmm Ali: no bitch Ali: i know you're princess 'round these parts but still Ali: carriage is back to being a pumpkin sweetie Carly: but im 🤒 Ali: you're hanging Ali: can't claim morning sickness now bitch Ali: chop chop Carly: ha Carly: k bitch Carly: honeymoon over yea Ali: will be if your 'rents come back to this and murder you Carly: idc Carly: be sweet to me Ali: awh baby Ali: only playing tough love Ali: thinking i'm spending too much time with my gf? Carly: yea Carly: i missed you when she stole you away Ali: how dare she 😜 Ali: missed you too tho Carly: youre mine Carly: married you first Carly: & you didnt say bye to me 😢 Ali: are you sure Ali: 'cos I ain't Ali: but how unforgivably rude 😰 Carly: id remember Carly: never forget my boo Ali: baby Carly: you can make it up to me tho Ali: oh yeah? Ali: lemme guess, feed u grapes whilst you recline Carly: nah just be here Ali: easy Ali: got to yoga first but then i'll be there Ali: went too hard with the dancing last night obvs Carly: k ill shower that lad off me Carly: i think you went just right baby Ali: too descriptive babe 😬😂 Ali: calm down with your creative ways Carly: ha Carly: you should hear me sext Carly: so good Ali: sure Ali: maybe works on the straight boys 😉 Carly: not trying to work on anyone else Carly: tell your gf if shes gonna come for me Ali: you're alright, not her type Ali: I barely am Ali: 50% like Carly: shit odds Carly: that why shes so angry Ali: as shit as yours Ali: just in reverse Ali: not saying you're both wrong but Carly: k Carly: cant all be perfect babe Carly: thats just you Ali: 💁 Carly: you kno Ali: ugh my brother's being so annoying Ali: bitch i'm coming down i will fight you Carly: which 1 Ali: dancing one Carly: hes fun Ali: glad you think so Ali: send him over instead yeah Carly: you come here & stay at yours Carly: i'll Ali: alright Ali: you're getting a rough deal soz Carly: why Ali: 'cos he's usually the alright one, so if he's testing me, wait 'til the rest rock up Carly: idc i can sleep through anything Ali: be my guest Carly: but i want you to be mine Carly: had to share last nite Ali: you done w sharing? Carly: yea Carly: im mad Ali: aww Ali: pouty princess Carly: [sends a pouty selfie] Carly: cuz its better when you stay Ali: you're so cute Ali: it's rude and i object Carly: just for you my baby Ali: 😏 such a tease Carly: nah Carly: you can have anything you want Ali: yeah yeah Ali: anything you want from the shops Carly: theres nothing here Carly: i cant do that to you Ali: okay, i'll get breakfast and cleaning shit Carly: theres no money tho Ali: i don't mind Ali: s'only breakfast Ali: IOU if you want but honestly Carly: you're too good to me & for me boo Ali: nah i'm not Ali: no one deserves to be treated like shit the morning after Carly: got me crying Ali: baby Ali: don't be sad Carly: come down is a bitch but youre an angel Ali: 💚 i know Ali: you've survived it many a time before though, you'll be okay Ali: especially when you get some food and hugs Carly: yea Carly: shouldve invited your brother to my party Carly: what a bitch i am Ali: no no, he ain't here, just blowing up my phone being dumb Ali: you're alright, sure you'll meet him when summers out and he's out on town being fabulous Carly: k didnt fuck up the 1st impression Carly: love the gays Carly: your gf excluded like Ali: he's stalked your socials and liked what he's seen Ali: not in a creepy way 'cos gay, of course Ali: awh 😂 why can't we all get along Carly: he can add me i wont send him nudes Carly: cuz she looks at me like she was willing me to hang this hard Ali: oh good to know 😜 Ali: not letting him though, he chats shite and if he's gonna I need to vet it Ali: deal with it boy, crazy posessive wife like Ali: she's just angry with me Carly: idk who lads are if i cant id them in my usual and not seen his dick Carly: my bad if nudes go where they shouldnt Carly: whats he saying about me Carly: who could be angry at you too beautiful Ali: me either for a while, like Ali: feel it's unfair to describe it from memory of having to bath together Ali: awks Ali: just that you're cute Ali: n fun, of course Ali: and a hoe with it 😜 so her, easily lol Carly: aw Carly: but you didnt snog ronan last nite he werent there Ali: nah but she thinks i'm making a twat out of myself with you Ali: tragic straight girl crush, like Carly: cant have a crush on your missus Carly: weve gone beyond it Carly: real love Ali: yeah Ali: but you know Carly: she thinks were gonna fuck Carly: 3way would sort that Ali: exactly Ali: can't on principle Ali: and even if we whack out the strapon, no real dick for you so Carly: list where ive been Carly: puts loads of people off Carly: she'll know youre not trying to get w me Ali: i'm not gonna do you like that Ali: fuck that Carly: idc Carly: do what youve gonna do boo Ali: i know you don't Ali: but i do Ali: fuck those people who are just mad they weren't higher up in the list Ali: s'why you weren't so jog on Carly: stop being so nice to me Carly: if youre mean she'll forget her jealousy Ali: i don't want to Ali: i can handle it Ali: if she can't then Ali: that's that, isn't it Carly: yea Carly: but i dont wanna start shit for you Ali: trust, you didn't start this Ali: it's easier for her to pretend that's all it is Ali: that's all Carly: k Carly: if i was a lad id be fucked wouldnt i Ali: probably Ali: don't agree with that, it'd be the same but it'd be different in how she'd be able to deal, yeah Carly: thank god i grew some tits Ali: 😂 Ali: good job babe Carly: my ma was made up as well Carly: took a while like Carly: cant let her get the album out cuz i look like a lad Carly: pretty one tho Ali: you were always cute Ali: i remember Ali: grew into your ears and all 😉 Carly: aw Carly: do you tho? Ali: yeah, 'course Carly: you were always scrapping Carly: shouldve got w your gf then she'd like you more Ali: 😬 let us not think of how troubling the age gap woulda seemed then Ali: must've thought i was a right scouse stereotype Ali: bitches deserved it tho Carly: i thought you were cute Carly: & brave Carly: i was always behind my ma's legs Ali: like my sister Ali: I was always down for the more the merrier but her and Laoise said coven's had to be three so Ali: 🔮 number and all Ali: and tbh Laoise weren't that thrilled Ro was there, like Carly: black magic vibes from her forever Ali: legit Ali: shoulda been scrapping with her, like Carly: yea or fucking her first bf but i got there before you Carly: idk how she knew tho cuz he didnt tell anyone Ali: never lose that sixth sense, babe Ali: esp. when concerning keeping a man 🙄 Carly: did her a favor he was shit Carly: didnt have a clue what he was doing Carly: thought every virgin binge watched porn like Ali: 😂 Ali: have you ever binge watched? you're learning nothing of value from that shite Carly: yea but when youre bored youre bored Ali: I hear ya Ali: always bored Carly: me too Carly: & this sex drive isnt set for a cry wank or eye fuck Carly: no offence ma and da Ali: can't take it personally, lads Ali: ain't there's to try and control Carly: they gotta txt me back so i kno when they are coming home Carly: wtf got you two so busy Ali: all that sex they ain't having Carly: porn binge watch Carly: tho my dad likes reading his Ali: Can't beat a sticky page Ali: lost arm form Ali: art, lmao Ali: sure his form is grand Carly: doctor like howd you lose that arm Carly: epic cry wank Ali: 💪 on the right Ali: limp noodle on the other Carly: hot Ali: that's your father you're talking about Ali: no need to be that stereotypical Carly: shit my bad Ali: 😂 Ali: i love you bitch Carly: I love you too Carly: loads Carly: im mad at you again tho Ali: why what have i done>!> Carly: some1 came round the doorway & i thought it was you so i opened up but nah Carly: enjoy the eyeful lads Ali: oh babe Ali: 😏 bless you Carly: not gonna put clothes on for my girl Carly: waste of time Ali: obvs, charm you out so quick Ali: least it weren't the postie, or was it Ali: Ma reckons we were gonna get complaints, as if mother Carly: lad did deliver for me Carly: not letters tho Carly: least id showered Ali: gotta replenish Ali: you chasing off your comedown rn tho Carly: cant outrun that bitch Carly: some of the mas on site are mad tho you can tell yours Carly: state of their sons my bad Carly: should've kept em in if you were bothered Ali: oh great Ali: no you can't speak to the manager, piss off helen Carly: ha Carly: my da is gonna be in such a mood when he hears Carly: sorry you missed out Ali: parents Ali: not like anyone died Ali: calm it everyone Carly: dont want me to fuck on site dont want me to go off it Carly: talk sense Carly: other day you were trying to marry me off da Ali: just 'cos it brings people to his door Ali: soz to take you away from all the cranking but Carly: yea Carly: sorry im not hiding in the back like w i was little Ali: yeah Ali: too big for the caravan now baby Ali: need your own, how much is it to rent Carly: theyre on about it but the state on this one might change their minds Carly: im cleaning as fast as i can k Ali: we're gonna sort it, i am omw swear Ali: and i'm a parent pleaser so Ali: do the rounds, sweettalk to mothers Carly: he'll just take me back to the doctors like take her off the tablets shes too outgoing now thx Carly: another of your talents boo Ali: when the meds work TOO well Ali: but of course Carly: if he was around hed kno how shit they are Carly: ha Ali: 😔 Ali: baby Carly: its k just gotta double down Carly: pro now Ali: 💚 Carly: style the freakout out cuz ima bad bitch Carly: facts and talents Ali: no lies Ali: the baddest Carly: what we doing today that isnt boring Ali: you mean you ain't buzzing to make like kim and aggy Ali: rude, i'm living Carly: do anything w you but Carly: can only check you out every time you bend Ali: cheeky Ali: appaz imma check all of you out, like Carly: what you dont wanna Carly: your gf will be sad shes so wrong Ali: didn't say that but yeah Ali: hate to make her admit that as well, like Carly: ill tell her Ali: you gonna snitch on me Ali: 🍯 Carly: nah jk Carly: i like annoying her tho Ali: i know Ali: it is funny Ali: not taking sides but lol Carly: taking mine i kno Ali: shh Ali: there's no right or wrong here, babe Carly: k but you love me more Ali: its different Carly: maybe Ali: maybe huh Carly: idk she dont think it is Ali: yeah Ali: but we know the truth Carly: fact is we're ruling this place together Carly: no surprise shes jealous Ali: if the 👑 fits like Ali: soz babe Carly: & we fit Carly: cant fight it Ali: nope Ali: if it works it works Carly: yea & you work it better than anyone babe Ali: oh you Ali: save it for all the Ma's you gotta say soz to Ali: 💋 Carly: ha Carly: mine will kick my arse out if she gets on one better leave the mattress where it is Ali: not gonna come to that but always room for a lil one at ours Ali: i got you Carly: aw Carly: never had a sleepover when i was a kid Ali: 😧 then you gotta Ali: tbh they weren't all that always but you know mine were the best Carly: yea no doubt Carly: all the magic Ali: exactly, midnight snacks and scaring the shit out of each other Ali: can tell you who you gonna marry if you've got a tea light, like Carly: thats easy tho Carly: no1 Ali: alright then, excluding the fact we already is so rude, tbh Ali: i'll tell you who you next gonna bang Ali: same diff Carly: youre just gonna say you Carly: smooth Ali: please Ali: gimme some credit 😂 Carly: now i gotta kno Ali: we'll do it when i get there Ali: which will be soon Ali: got stuck chatting to an old lady in the shop Ali: assume she can't see or she'd have avoided me like hell 😂 bless her Carly: if its ronan again or his cousin dont tell me Carly: aw so cute Carly: youre the sweetest & prettiest ever Ali: i'll casually throw the wax in the bin like nothing to see here Ali: not this morning baby but 1/2 ain't bad #stillgotit Carly: tell me you see my death & run like k bye Carly: every morning Ali: you'd rather your literal death? they ain't THAT bad, predictable but like, damn Ali: that's some shade, feel the burn, lads Ali: so are you cutie Carly: idk but over ronan hard Carly: hes being such an arsehole to me Carly: cba Ali: don't Ali: ignore his Carly: yea but like im gonna see him even if i do Carly: fucking site life Ali: i kno but blank him Ali: nothing talks louder Ali: or if you gotta, be proper polite like he's a stranger Carly: ha yea Carly: amazing Ali: childish but so is he so Ali: two can play at that game Carly: youre right i kno Carly: ive deleted his txts so i cant show you but its k cuz youd be sad Carly: or mad Ali: i'm sure i could guess the gist Ali: you can tell me if you wanna talk about it though, i promise i won't go ripshit Carly: idc Carly: ive known him long so i didnt think hed go that hard but thats what lads are like Carly: he fucks around more than me too Ali: he's a hypocrite Ali: just 'cos he knows other lads can do it better Ali: he's just insecure, babe, ignore him Carly: i need a holiday from here Carly: but ma & da never take me w Ali: shit considering how many times they manage Ali: cut a hol off and you'd have enough funds lads Ali: maybe we can Carly: i did kick off last time cuz they didnt refill my prescription Carly: went crazy like Carly: wouldnt want that girl there either Ali: not your fault, that, though Ali: you were literally off your meds Carly: that they reckon i dont need tho Ali: if you didn't then you wouldn't act like that without Ali: simple as Carly: never thought of that Ali: we'll go, i promise Ali: even if it ain't far Carly: lets camp Carly: marshmallows are the shit Ali: hell yeah! Ali: let's find a cave forreal Carly: YEA Carly: dont fall over tho Ali: do my best 😂 Carly: you gotta Carly: only scaring me w ghost stories or whatever Ali: promise Carly: k we'll go Carly: 💙 Ali: 💚 done and done Ali: do you wanna bring anyone else or Carly: got my fave coming Carly: do you Ali: nah Ali: just wanna take you exploring Carly: k Carly: then you can Ali: 👌 Carly: id go now so whenever you want boo Ali: soon Ali: i'll work it out Carly: i kno Carly: got the belief Ali: 🔮 Carly: should get dressed or nothing'll get done Ali: awh Ali: you knew i just got here Carly: they arent on yet Carly: not that fast Ali: jk Ali: find me on the mattress when you're decent bitch Carly: baby no Carly: youll catch something off that Ali: sitting on the carrier bag Ali: always thinking Carly: so smart

[i-amusemyself]

All the stationary.

Ahhhh ty!!! I can’t tell if you wanna know that much bc you gaf or not though.....

Paranoia aside imma overshare either way!! *finger guns*

gel pen: when are you most comfortable?

I mean, I have anxiety so that just doesn’t happen much lmao! My first thought though was when I visit my favourite place, a little corner of a field with amazing views where I’m always on my own. I love it there.

ballpoint pen: tell me about the day you’ve just had

The day I’ve had was hell, so I’d rather relive yesterday.

Yesterday I woke up and binge watched supernatural; actually remembered to eat for once then was actually motivated enough to do revision. I got into hysterics over a tumblr post so quickly decided it was a day I should be avoiding hella emotional stuff....10 minutes later I was watching the last ever episode of prison break and sobbing uncontrollably at every word. In the afternoon I went out but not before losing my phone which was exactly where I left it. By that point though I was so late I had to speed walk at least 2 miles to the next village, where of course my friend arrived flanked by two pretty decent looking guys. I honestly looked like a tomato with water retention issues at that point so I’m sure that was a fabulous first impression. Then we got over to our revision session at the library early so went to the pub instead which was a dream; didn’t get any alcohol though because you can’t revise biology while hammered. Believe me. Then I stayed up late enough to get my ass whooped last night but it was so worth it because even though it turned into some sort of snapchat contest, I was laughing my ass off the whole time it was amazing. 

That enough of a day for you?fineliner: what���s your greatest achievement?

I used to train with the england basketball team, and I played for East Midlands. That was a pretty cool experience.highlighter: what are your best qualities?

Jfc, plural? Idk! I’m pretty motivated? And I always make an effort to tell the truth (if its good, otherwise I keep my mouth shut).

greylead: what is something you want to try for the first time?

Being attractive. Being loved. Need I go on? Oh and also giant zip-lining.felt-tip: describe your aesthetic

My bedroom looks like an ikea showroom lmfaooo so whatever that is. Weird architecture and cacti and random objects in neat little storage places.

But equally like, overgrown graveyards mixed with roses and anything black. Depends on my mood.crayon: your earliest childhood memory

Treading on a bee and having to have the sting removed from my foot lmao

scrapbook: something from your childhood that makes you smile

............um??

Okay there was this one time we found an old camera in the loft. I must’ve been 3 since my dad was still there. Anyway we all went out in the garden and it was such a normal little family thing, but it’s the only time I ever remember that happening. It’s got my parents waving and looking happy and me sticking my head out from inside a little wendy house grinning and it’s so cute. It’s the sort of thing I wish I’d had more of.

sketching pad: describe yourself from a stranger’s point of view

A lanky thing approaches. It has a stereotypical lesbian haircut, bad eyesight and appears to have given up on all things fashionable. It’s shy and awkward, so makes you feel extremely uncomfortable too. It appears to be reasonably friendly, but occasionally says things that don’t make a single bit of sense before desperately looking around the room looking for more small talk inspiration. You’re overall impression is it’s a pretty boring human being, probably totally harmless, but would be incredibly easy to replace.notebook: what’s your favourite quote?

I have a couple of little quotes I remind myself of on a daily basis, ranging from song lyrics; “darling you’ll be okay” and “the sun will rise and we will try again” to “pick your fights” and “you gotta give a bit of yourself to get something in return”. I kinda live my life by those.paper: what kind of book would you write?

I have absolutely no idea! I can’t see myself ever having the motivation to write a book.stapler: out of all the people you know, who do you think you are closest to?

My best friend @only-slightly-dangerous who literally knows me so well it’s scary! She can literally message me out of knowhere and know from 3000 miles away if I’m in pain.glue stick: what do you look for in a lasting relationship/friendship?

I can’t be dealing with people that lie or are fake or whatever. So definitely honesty. Also people just being themselves and not being afraid to be weird or whatever, because that’s when I relax a bit lmao! I guess a decent sense of humor too? And someone that doesn’t mind you asking questions or whatever. Idk. Sometimes you just click with people without being about to put it down to a specific characteristic.tape: tell me about your longest friendship

It wasn’t very long. 

I mean I had “friendships” through all of primary school but that doesn’t really feel like it counts. Secondary school? The first girl I made friends with and was really close to for 5 years is now like,,, someone I honestly can’t even stand to hear about soooruler: what line will you never cross?

I could never cheat. eraser: what do you consider to be your biggest mistake?

I’m not sure. Maybe not standing up for myself more at school and at home. There have been occasions where it would have been totally reasonable but I just shut up and let shit happen so I’ve spent a lot of time beating myself up about that stuff.

Also, and I know I shouldn’t but, I still spend a lot of time thinking about a boy at our school who killed himself and I never knew him but I still wonder if I could have done anything.scissors: ever had a bad break-up?

Nothing hella nasty but I don’t really talk to any of my ex’s at all.calculator: list fifteen things that make you happy

Lmaooo I’ll do my best!! Okay so music; concerts; friends; seeing other people laughing; making people laugh; stand up comedy; hella good art; hearing people tell stories; sitting and listening in the middle of knowhere; thunderstorms; exploring; helping people; good food; the sound of rain on the roof; cuddling and tumblr.protractor: an unpopular opinion/angle you have on an issue

Pinapple is good on pizza.sticky note: something about yourself you’d like to change

I feel like I have no personality so like,,,I wish that could be better. I wish I was pretty. Or attractive or whatever. Oh and I wish I could sing those hella high notes because I feel sorry for the neighbours atm.stamp: a date that’s special for you and why

25th March because that’s the day my life changed just enough for me to carry on.bookmark: a book that means a lot to you and why

I always just say Numbers, but honestly it was the first ever book I cried at and I feel like it helped me understand the world a little more.folder: describe your family

How long do you have? I mean, it’s quite a small family but I’m not that close to any of them. Most of them are just pretty conservative living in little nuclear families. I didn’t used to get on too well with my dad but we’ve got a lot closer. I still don’t get on with my mum very well though bc she’s abusive. welp. whiteboard: tell me your plans for tomorrow

I’m gonna die a slow, painful death by revision and then recover when I go to my dad’s and walk Borris.blackboard: tell me about a memory that has affected who you are today

All those memories are locked away in a place I can’t get to and I think it’s best to keep it that way for now.

A low key one is probably when a friend once told me nobody cared about me or what I had to say and I’ve basically been mute in most social situations since XDpinboard: what are you focusing on in your life right now?

Exams. A level exams. Just one more month and I’m freeeee!!!tablet: tell me your plans for the future

Start a fresh life at uni and get this degree. Then who knows? I’ll probably go and get another degree and I’m pretty sure I’ll end up doing medicine.stencil: who are your role models?

I don’t have very many. Kaitlyn Alexander for sure, because they really helped me understand who I am and start to accept it. Also Luke Cutforth because I love his YouTube channel but also a lot of things he’s done related to mental health have been helpful and I relate a lot.envelope: tell me a secret

I’m going to my end of year prom in a shirt and tie and I haven’t told anyone yet and I’m scared shitless. I’m still gonna do it though!!

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #42

“i don’t ask much, i just want you.”

have you ever been to the white house?   no, i haven't. what are your plans for tomorrow?   not shit.  like always.  maybe be able to adopt my snake. do you have a debit card?   no why did you stop working at the last place you were employed?   i kept having anxiety attacks that induced vomiting. have you ever made out with a complete stranger?   no...? what would you do if you found out your ex was pregnant/fathered a child?   probably kill myself. are you very close to your siblings?   no would you kiss the last person you kissed again?   i'd love to. what bugged you about the last person you dated?   well i know now that he's not very understanding.  but he tried to be. have you ever slapped someone, why?   i hit my sister when i was little.  don't remember why. have you ever had sex with someone the same night you met them?   no, because i'm not a whore. if you could fly or breathe underwater, what would you choose?   the latter, i think. is your life the same as it was a year ago?   exactly the fucking same. are you in love with someone?   should be obvious enough. what is your relationship status? are you happy with that?   single, and no.  i'm lonely as fuck. have you ever thought you could do a better job at being president?   hell no. when people smoke around you, does it make you cough?   sometimes.  it'll always give me a headache. would you rather name your child michelle or monica?   michelle do you know anyone who works at mcdonald’s?   no have you ever felt like you lost a part of yourself?   i KNOW i fucking have.  when jason left, it was like the majority of me fucked off. have you ever suspected your mom or dad of having an affair?   no. when you younger and misbehaved, what did your parents threaten you with?   mom would threaten to spank me or take away computer privileges do you think it’s weird how babies are made?   i mean yeah, i guess, but it is what it is. how would you react if your last ex wanted to get back together?   i would just... fuck, man.  i'd be so damn happy. are you comfortable in a short skirt?   fuck no. do you and your family go on a vacation every year?   no.  we never do. when you were going out with your last ex and you had the chance to date your celebrity crush, would you have left your bf/gf for them?   absolutely not.  i don't care who my celeb crush is, no one lights a candle to jason. does your dad swear?   yeah if your last kiss asked you on a date, what would you say?   absofuckinglutely!!! do you think braces are sexy?   does anybody, really?  it's just something you tolerate.  i don't think anyone's "sexy quotient" is affected by whether or not she/he wears braces. do you know anyone that is gothic?   i'd love to be a goth if i could afford the wardrobe. how many coats of mascara do you use?   like two what were you almost named?   kathryn does your family hire someone to do your chores for you?   no do you know how to use photoshop?   very vaguely how about sony vegas?   yeah what is the main reason you want to have children when you grow up?   idk, i just... do?  when i was with jason, i wanted children because i loved him so much and thus human instinct would have it i wanted his kids, but now that i'm with nobody idk, i just want kids one day.  i guess. what do you struggle with?  depression, anxiety, ptsd, bipolarity, no job, no money...  i struggle with everything. are you self conscious?  VERY what is the name on your birth certificate (feel free to withhold your last name for privacy reasons)?   brittany marie is all you need to know. what day did you take your first breath?   february 5th, 1996 what are the names of the lovely individuals that brought you into this world?   donna and ken. the stereotyped image of a girl LOVES to shop. does this hold true to you?   i like to shop only if it's for myself.  i know that sounds greedy, but i just like... don't get the pleasure sensation otherwise. even if shopping isn’t your favorite... every girl has a favorite store. what’s yours?   hottopic which type of undies do you wear most: Thongs, bikini/briefs, bootyshorts, or granny panties?   if i wear underwear, bikini. describe your style for me, using minimal words?   comfortable do you have a walk in closet? do you even have a closet it all?   no, yes. tampons or pads? why?   tampons, because i don't like feeling like wearing a bloody diaper. do you ever pamper yourself? what do you do?   no, because i'm fucking poor. do you like surprises?   no.  i get scared of what it is. how many people of the opposite sex do you fully trust?   none. when is the last time you watched a hockey game?   yearrrrssss ago. ever been paid for sex or a sexual favor?   nope. have you ever been to a strip club?  no, and i never will. do you listen to a variety of music, or do you tend to stick to one genre?   i stick to a genre.  metal. when you’re going to be at home all day, do you bother to get out of your pajamas?   no.  which is like every day. do you play angry birds?   no.  i just recently saw the movie tho and it was super cute. what do you have pierced on you?   ears, nose. what’s important about april?   my little sister's birthday is there anyone who hates you?   probably if I say “psycho”, who is the first person that comes to your mind?   me dated someone more than once?   no where did you get the last shirt you were wearing?   hottopic does your mom know your deepest darkest secrets?   no. are you scared of needles?   nah, not really. do you know what an ‘amv’ is?   yeah, i make them sometimes. how many songs are on your ipod/mp3 player?   over 1,000 are there any orange clocks in your house?   no do mice freak you out?  not at all. how many formal dances did you or have you gone to in high school?   i went to two proms. is there a certain movie you always cry at when you watch it?   yeah, "the notebook" tears me up everytime. are any of your siblings married?  yeah do you like kiwi?   hell yes. ever go ghost hunting?   no when it’s time to dress up for a special occasion, are you more likely to wear a dress, a skirt, or dress pants?   dress if you eat oatmeal, do you add water or milk to it? what is your favorite flavor?   milk, bc i dislike its flavor when i add water.  my fave's apples and cinnamon. if you could only own a hair dryer, curling iron, or straightener, which one would you choose?   straightener if you’re straight, have you ever thought about kissing the same sex? if you’re gay, have you ever thought about kissing the opposite sex?   no. your last relationship, who dumped who?   he dumped me. do you believe in love at first sight? explain.   no, because even thinking it's possible to look at someone and love them is ignorant as fuck. do you keep a planner?   no, because i don't need one.  i don't do anything significant, ever. do you want kids anytime soon?   no. are you excited for next year?   not really.  new years doesn't mean anything.  what occurs in time isn't affected by one year suddenly ending and changing into another.  2017 will be just as bad as 2016, probably. do you know any german words?   i took four classes of it, i know plenty. do you say any words that are pretty specific to your area?   no have you ever smoked?   nope can you make yourself cry?  no. have you ever held a starfish?   i don't think so. would you rather live in hawaii or alaska?   alaska could you use a haircut?   totally what do you put on your scrapes or cuts?   usually, nothing.  sometimes a band-aid. do you like cheez-its or cheese nips better?   cheez-its by a long shot. have you ever held a snake?   yes.  i hope to again very soon<3 do you know anyone from canada?   yeah, jacob's ex.  nice girl. has a wild animal ever been loose in your house?   mice are you scared to look at your own organs on x-ray or ultrasound?   naw, shit's cool. have you ever met an alaskan?   only online.  my friend mikaela's alaskan. did you ever play spyro?   lmao.  i'd STILL be playing it if i had my ps2. have you ever had a near death experience?   car wreck, yeah. do you think some babies are ugly?   some definitely are. do you love stuff crusted pizza?   no, actually. do you apply lotion after you bathe?   no, but i REALLY should. has a youtube video of yours ever gotten over 10,000 views?  nah son. would you ever get a tattoo on your collar bone?   ha ha, i already do. do gangs scare you?   of course they do.  the bloods tried to break into our house once when ashley was home alone with maddie. what do you think of girls with huge boobs that don’t wear bras in public?   i don't care how big your boobs are, if your breasts are developed, wear a bra, please.  it's only to be decent. does your best friend wear makeup?   she rarely does. do you prefer to fix the problems or just end the relationship?   be a fucking adult and fix the damn problems. would you rather have donuts or donut holes?   donuts do you still watch movies on vhs?   no, mom got rid of ours have you used a ouija board and had a freaky experience with it?   no, never used one. what’s one health problem you wish you didn���t have?   get rid of my depression.  god, please. what “group” did you belong to in high school?   everyone considered me an emo.  guess i was and still am one, i'm so ridiculously emotional. what is the best thing you have done in your life?   dated jason. what is your favorite animal? list three adjectives to explain your choice.   meerkats, as they're very social, ridiculously bold, and curious. what was your nickname growing up?   twinkie if you could be anything in the world, what would you be and why?   a meerkat biologist, because i love meerkats so much and they make me happy. have you ever had feelings for 2 people at the same time?   nope. if you found someone seemingly perfect for you, but it turned out they had a child… would you still give the relationship a chance?   at my age, no. if your best friend of the opposite sex tried to kiss you, would you start kissing them back?  probably not, honestly. have you ever kissed someone who has previously kissed someone you hated?   yep do you think the next person you kiss will be a better kisser than the last person you kissed?   HA.  i HIGHLY doubt that.

[justastrugglinggirl]

I started writing at like 3:00 AM and these are my thoughts.. sorry its kinda long

Hello, my fellow strugglers. If you have found your way to this page, congrats I guess. I won't be sharing this link with anyone and have decided to keep who I am 100% anonymous. I really don't know what I'm doing, I was feeling down and wanted to talk about all my shit but I ran into three problems...

1) It's about 3 AM so no one is awake.

2) Even if people were awake, I don't have anyone to talk to, yes I have friends and people who care but let's be real, do they really give a fuck? Would they give me any advice that I haven't already thought of?

3) All of my shit is confidential, no one in my life knows all the fucking shit I have going on, and they aren't about to find out.

So instead of ranting on my finsta just for no one to comment, or texting my friends a long ass paragraph about why I'm upset just for them to say "aw I'm sorry" then continue with their gossip, I decided to make this fucking blog. Don't ask me where I got the idea because I don't know. I guess I like the idea of being able to talk to the world about all my damn problems without anyone actually knowing who I am.

I probably have about one thousand things to bitch about but of course, the thing that has me up into the late hours of the night is a boy. Man oh man, I don't even know where to start, but since I got a while and don't wanna go to bed, I'll tell you everything. (This dude has been a problem in my life for over a year now, so I will most definitely skip over something on accident but just go with it). I don't wanna put any real names online because ya know... digital footprint or whatever so I'm gonna call him "Rocket".

Okay so it all started about a year ago, I was at an extremely lame party and found myself sitting quietly in the basement of some person's house on a couch with no one I knew. Now lots of people were bored so as the night went by, more and more people started to crowd together away from the twerk fest. This is when I met Rocket. Since the couch was so packed, we were forced to sit right next to each other, thigh against thigh, shoulders overlapping, ya know what I'm saying? So with nothing better to do, we started to talk, and pretty soon I figured out that he is the sweetest, most funny person I've ever met.

>>>>>> Sidenote, at this point I had only kissed two people in my entire life, and neither of them was my choice. So I was kinda awkward when it came to stuff like that so I didn't pick up on any of the hints that he might want a hookup. I missed the constant eye contact, I missed the gentle touching (not sexual but you know what I mean), I missed the compliments, I thought he was just a nice guy. Man, I wish I picked up on it, I wish I'd kissed him, I wish I flirted harder, why was I so fucking idiotic?? <<<<<<<

Back to the story. I went home that night with Rocket on my mind. A few days later my good friend (that happened to be dating Rocket's best friend) told me that Rocket wanted to hook up with me. Bet you can't guess what my dumb ass did. I FUCKING SAID NO!! I guess at that time I thought that if you hooked up with someone that made you a slut, dumb dumb dumb dumb me. Little did I know that this little hook up comment from my friend was completely wrong. Remember how I said my friend was dating Rockets bestie? Well, I guess Rocket told his bestie that he LIKED ME... not wanted to hook up... he liked me. I'm not sure where it got mixed up but this information went from Rocket to his bestie to my friend. So after I declined his so-called hookup request he moved on, but oh my loooorddddyyyy I still had a crush on him.

Fast forward in time a bit, somehow through the course of like 5 weeks my friends and his friends mixed and we became a friend group... TERRIFIC... So our new group hung out damn near every day of every weekend. I was forced to be with the guy that I had the BIGGEST crush on 24/7 while he had no idea, and treated me like "a bro". This is what I like to call my own personal hell. But wait, it gets so much fucking worse.

For this to make sense I kind of have to loop back in time, so let's pretend this is one of those scenes in the movies where the video freezes then the narrator starts talking and it cuts to a flashback.

Flashback:

 {I happen to be a cheerleader, and oh my goodness if you're about to judge me for it I will fucking murder you. Let's stop the stereotypes... no, I'm not a bitch, not popular, not dumb, not a fucking blond. During practice I got really close with my teammate... let's call her Mouse. The whole time I liked Rocket, I told Mouse everything about it, whenever he did something sweet, something mean, if he hugged me, anything and everything. Okay now that you know this little piece of information, let's cut back to the story.}

Hmm bet you can't guess who else started to like Rocket. Bet you would never think that my cheerleader friend would stab me in the back and go for the guy that I've been telling her about for months. Bet you thought that stuff only happened in the movies. Well, guess what, you're wrong. I'm sure your thinking, it can't get worse, your friend already broke the girl code, your boy story doesn't get worse right? Wrong. Rocket fucking decided to like her back. WHAT THE FUCK. Remember how we are in a friend group? Guess who got to hear about everything Rocket had to say about Mouse. This girl!! lol guess who's a dumb bitch and didn't say anything to either of them. This girl!! Guess who actually gave her crush good advice about his new chick. This girl!! Guess who played cupid in their little fucking love story. This girl!! Guess whose life is a living hell. This girl!!

Let's fast forward a bit to a little peaceful time in my story where Rocket's little fling with Mouse has finally ended. During this time, I actually had hope, this kid would flirt with me, hug me from the back and everything. His friends or as he would say "bros" told me he liked me. Then one day after we snapchatted for legit hours back and forth, he said something that just fuckin broke my heart. (We were literally doing so well, and I actually thought we had a chance. UGH!) He texted me and goes "hey [insert his cute nickname for me here], I heard that you like me but I don't wanna be all that".

WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK YOU DICKWAD!?!?!? WHATTTTT WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU LEAD ME ON FOR SO LONG IF YOU HAD NO INTENTION OF BEING WITH ME!?!?!?

Like any normal person, I replied with something along the lines of "lol idk where you heard that but I don't like you" then being the asshat that he is he went on saying that he didn't believe me and that he could tell I liked him. Okay, I know this shouldn't have made me so pissed but at this moment he was being such a cocky little asshole and I was embarrassed, so I told him I liked some guy from a high school near ours. For my lie to work I had to pretend it wasn't a lie, so naturally, I told all my gals to go along with it and they did. My little fib was kinda successful, but the truth always comes out...

Suprise, this part of the story takes place at another party. I guess one of my dude friends in my friend group (let's call him Rainbow) saw me admiring Rocket from a distance (oops, I couldn't help it, this guy is seriously just so cute). So while I was talking to one of my guy friends (not in squad) Rainbow came up to us and shouted "YOU STILL LIKE ROCKET". . . FUCK YOU RAINBOW!!!  Now the kid I was talking to was completely surprised and wouldn't let it go, even though I insisted that Rainbow was wrong and that I liked my made up, guy. Guess who walked up to us as we were talking about it... FUCKING ROCKET!

So the guy I was talking to shouts "Hey Rocket, [insert my name here] likes you!!!" Dude seriously like what the hell. I was completely embarrassed. I started to get hot, my forehead started to bead with sweat, I could feel my face getting bright red. If I tried to lie my way out, no one would believe me. So I stood there for what seemed like forever just trying to think of how to make my little personal hell end and all I came out with was "no". You wanna know what Rocket said? He goes "I know she does". EEEERRRRRGGGGG I fucking liked him so much but oh my goodness I hated him too. So that was that for a while, just me living in embarrassment every time I saw him, getting all red whenever he entered the room. He made me feel so small like I was wrong for liking him- sorry your so perfect and I can't help but be obsessed with you.

After some time everyone forgot about me liking him, and I guess I learned to hide it a lot better. Because oh baby, those feelings did not go away. So he started to treat me like a bro again and telling me about the girls he liked. Guess who he liked again? Mouse. So being the good person that I am, I gave him advice about her, I sucked it up because I wanted him to be happy. If that meant he wasn't with me, whatever. If she made him happy, I would help it happen. Like all high school relationships, it didn't last and they ended their thing.

Now he decided to move onto another girl I cheered with, so I helped him with it and go her to like him because I'm just that good of a person. Damn, why do I always sabotage myself?

So after his short-lived thing with the other cheerleader (dang I guess he has a type),  he started flirting with me again. Okay, I know I've mistaken someone being nice with flirting before, but this time I was sure. He would snap me saying I was pretty, text me when he was bored, ask me to hang out one on one, play truth or truth over the phone. I thought that my hell was finally ending, I thought maybe just maybe I would get to be happy. So one night we were up late talking to each other he started to ask who I liked (bitch, its youuuu), I didn't wanna tell him so I would just say I wouldn't tell or I didn't know. Then I would ask who he liked, and he replied the same way, which made me pretty excited. So after a while of going back and forth, he said "[insert my nickname here], just tell me, what if we like each other?" You can imagine how happy I was. I don't know if I've ever smiled so big before. I was kicking my feet in excitement, I had so much energy, I was the happiest girl alive. I replied with "you first". Prepare yourself for a lifetime of let down, because he replied with "I like Mouse".

WHAT THE FUCK YOU CAN'T DO THAT, THIS IS WRONG, REWIND TIME, THIS CAN'T BE REAL. WHY OH WHY WOULD SOMEONE SAY THAT. YOU CAN'T SUGGEST THAT YOU LIKE ME THEN GO BACK TO THAT FUCKING BTICH. WHAT THE FUCK DUDE.

My heart sank, I could actually feel that red beating thing in my chest drop. I had so much excitement and I was so happy, then one fucking snap chat took it all away. Why does Mouse get him, what makes her so much better than me that he would keep going back to her? Was it because she was prettier, would she put out faster than me, was it the way she dressed, was she funnier, nicer? Please fucking tell me. I replied and said that I liked a kid from camp, now this kid wasn't made up, and I did talk to him a lot, enough for him to be on my best friends list, but he lived in Chicago, so nothing would ever actually happen with that. After this little heartbreak, I vowed to myself to never like Rocket again. He would never stop stringing me along, and he would always pick someone better than me.

At this point, I actually did get over Rocket. I didn't spend my nights thinking of kissing him, I didn't fantasize about us going on dates, he was out of my mind. The only thing is that there was no one else for me to like. No one compared to him, no one related to me as much as him. No one caught my eye. So I spent a long while, just single, and I got very bored. I got mini crushes on people during this time, but I never acted on them, and they were always very short lived, maybe one night I'll write about those too.

Fast forward. Rocket went out of town for almost all of summer because his dad lives in Florida. I'm not sure how it happened but we started snap chatting again. But I promise I didn't like him. We snapped about everything, like good friends would do. We talked about his family, what he wanted to do when he grew up, how he kind of still liked Mouse, how he was over Mouse, where he wanted to travel, everything. We had so much in common. For example, our love for sunsets was crazy, I had never met anyone that felt that same way as me when it came to colorful skies (I'll probably write about this more in-depth sometime). We even had the same favorite color: orange. So somehow in the midst of all of our snapping, another crush started to form, but this time it was different. I really knew him, I thought I understood him, we could talk forever about anything.

Then one night we were chatting and a very familiar topic came up. Who did we like? The conversation went the same way as the other times, both of us refusing to tell each other who we liked. {As a point of reference, I would like to point out that this happened about 3 days ago}. This time, he said something like "I think I like you, but I'm not 100% sure, over the past few days I've started to get feelings for you". I honestly didn't believe what I was reading, I was so sure that it was going to be like the last time. I was happy, but it wasn't like last time. I knew this kid, and I knew that this probably wasn't real, so I didn't let myself get overexcited again. I replied with something along the lines of "yeah, that's how I feel, I'm not really sure if I do or don't because we haven't seen each other in so long". I let myself get excited when he started talking about hanging out, just us.

Two nights ago, he came back to our hometown and went to hang with his bros, which I understand 100% because ya know 'bros before hoes'. Okay, this is about to get kind of confusing so I'm gonna do another one of those rewind things.

>>>>> Within our squad a couple formed, Rainbow and let's call the girl Hippie. I might write about this whole thing sometime but for now, I'll give you guys a summary. After lots of drama Rainbow and Hippie started to date but the relationship was bad so they broke up, and it was ugly, making things within our group very awkward. So Rainbow was an OG member of our squad so the bros are more loyal to him and took his side. They started being mean to Hippie, I always stood up for her and tried to include her, but after a while, the boys started to kick her out of the group because she was doing mean things to Rainbow. She got invited to less and fewer events and then she eventually left our group chat. The boys had a running joke about how she smelled bad (she does kinda smell but I hate that they talk bad about it). Another thing you need to know is that Rainbow was out of town during the point of the story that we are about to get back into. Now you have enough information for me to get back to the story.<<<<<

So Rocket was with his pals and Rainbow texted in our group chat saying he wanted to add her back in, and all of them complained and started sending memes about her. I texted in it telling them to stop and for Rainbow to add Hippie back in. Hippie was indeed added back in and when she was, some of the bros replied to it by saying "fuckkkk". They started sending memes encouraging her to leave the chat once again, and Rocket just let this happen, he even joined in on sending the memes. She left the chat again and I think she was really upset by it. Now, this might not sound like a big deal but it honestly pissed me off. I know some of Rocket's friends are mean, but that's never been him, he has always stood up for people or at least stayed quiet. This wasn't the Rocket that I had grown to like.

To make matters worse, once he got to his friend's houses, he left me on open, and I've been on open ever since. I know I'm being all bitchy and this stuff is not even a big deal but honestly, it has me pissed off.

If you've gotten this far into this post I'm very impressed because it was a whole lot of fucking teenage drama. You're also probably thinking that I'm petty and that these aren't even big problems. You are right. However, I've never had a real boyfriend, so this stuff is kinda big to me. Comment your thoughts on this, and tell me, should I go for Rocket?

[iolyne]

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thank u lmao!!!!!!! love u!!!!!!!!

Femme or butch? I wouldn’t consider myself either!! sometimes I wish I was butch but I don’t really know enough about what it takes to be butch and I’m also not confident enough ;-;

Do you have a “type”? If so, describe itI’m not sure! everyone I’ve liked fits a totally different description!! and I’ve only liked maybe 5 people :0:0 I really love confidence and when people care about their appearance? it’s good

Plaid button-ups or leather jackets?leather jackets!!!

Describe your styleuhhh idk I guess that like weeb goth that’s kind of trendy rn :,0 currently I only regularly wear like 2 pairs of black jeans and anime shirts since I just stay home most of the time lol

Describe your aestheticI really wouldn’t know how to describe it! I love neon lights and religious imagery like jesus stuff. I’m describing the aesthetic in my art i hope that’s ok!♡ im also really into oldweb&lovecore 

Favorite article of clothing?i have a denim shirt with lil embroidered red hearts and the button is a heart!! and the seams on the back make a heart shape its really cute!!!! and comfy!!

Favorite pair of shoes?my hot pink platforms i never wear haha!!

Current haircut?i have buzzed hair!

Any haircut goals for the future?im trying to grow my hair to be 2 inches on top! and id like to get the sides to ¾ and inch! and im planning on dying it pink again ;o 

Describe the best date you’ve been onjkfjfafjakks queerplatonic ok BUT edward and i do franky’s dance in the bathroom w no pants and im gonna count that but when we went to disney was the best

Describe the worst date you’ve been onI haven’t been on a date in a long time!!! honestly all the dates I went on were pretty good but one of my exes would always cancel on stuff we spent time planning so she could go to parties and I would cry @ home about thinking she hated me like once a week lol

Single? Taken?single and like honestly i miss being a girlfriend because it’s fun but i dont want to date rn anyways!!

If taken, talk about your girlfriend/wife!:( i want my wife already

If single, what are you looking for in a potential girlfriend/wife?i want my wife

Describe your dream weddingi want it to be Classy and idk i want a nice and not tacky wedding TBH and if i like……… had enough friens i would want a big wedding!! i dont want most of my family going tho lol

Do you want kids?no

If you could live anywhere in the world, where would you live?big mansion by the beach ;-;

Favorite lesbian movie?ive oly seen Carol and i dont like it so i dont have an answer haha

Favorite lesbian novel/story?never read one!!

Favorite lesbian song?girls like girls by hayley kiyoko

Favorite lesbian musician?hayley kiyoko i guess i cant remember any others

What lesbian stereotypes do you fit into, if any?mean lesbian, doesnt shave, short nails, hates men, big glasses, hates men, mean lesbian. communist

Ever been assumed to be nothing more than a gal pal?yea 

If a woman wanted to woo you, what would a surefire way to accomplish that?oh i love.attention honestly. uhhh i love when a woman is passionate about things and also has a good fashion sense ♥_♥

Be positive! What do you like most about being a lesbian?i love being a lesbian!!! like!! seeing other lesbians being proud of themselves or happy with their wives and girlfriends makes my heart so warm. i love the sense of community and the strong bond i love us

Are you more of a cat person or a dog person?i have a pet dog so! i gotta say a dog person ♥

Turn ons?i love necks and also ear piercings are sexy :0 and nice hands god when people wear lots of rings im ♥_♥ and when they carry themselves confidently and when they’re strong im so weak 

Turn offs?insensitivity!! and like liberals and centrists and right wingers HAHA also certain music tastes just. keep me away from other people ;0 

Do you usually ask other women out or do you wait for them to ask you?UH ive only really only liked maybe 4 people and i think it was all in high school??? bad memory. i think if i wanted to be with someone now i would ask her out!!! the last time i liked someone i was too scared to do anything and i think we both were waiting for the other to do something about it and nothing happened :/

What is your dream career?i would loooooooooove to be a photographer like to do the spreads and portraits for celebrities!!!

Talk about your interests or hobbies!i watch and think about anime a lot honestly :/ i dont do a whole lot right now! i used to spend a lot of time drawing and writing and if i had the space i would love to do that! im also really interested in skincare and hygiene i love to talk 2 ppl about it and help people get routines :o 

What is the most attractive quality a woman can have?confidence. if its a physical trait i would say nice hands 

Do you love easily or does it take time for you to warm up to someone?it takes time for me

Ever fallen for your best-friend?yes! my last girlfriend was my best friend before we dated! we are still close!

Ever fallen for a straight girl?i think the first girl i fell for was straight :0

The L-Word: yes or no? (love it or hate it?)never saw it!!!

Favorite comfort food?im eating a lot of instant noodles lately :/ my 2nd favorite food group is like southern comfort food i like chicken pot pies a lot lol

Coffee or tea?tea but i drink coffee more often

Vegetarian? Vegan? None of the above?neither! i cant do it!

Do you have any pets?i have a dog named teddy!

Early-riser or night-owl?night owl!

What is your sign?scorpio babey

Can you drive?hell yeah i can ive been driving for like 5 years

Who was your first lesbian crush?a girl in my art class freshman year i think her name was jenny or something like that? i cant even remember now but god from the moment i saw her i was smitten, i was weak, i spoke to her one time and i was so happy lol we only complimented each other’s art! she’s a year older than me and i thought she was the prettiest girl i had ever seen omg. jenny if you’re out there thanks for making me realize im a lesbian

At what age did you know you were a lesbian?when i was 16! i previously thought i was bi! and the first person i came out to was my girlfriend at the time!

At what age did you come out (if you have)?i first told my mom i liked girls when i was 14! i’ve for the most part just been open about being a lesbian though :0 but 2 or 3 years ago i made an Official Post on facebook saying i was a lesbian for the first time and god one of my aunts was so kind to me i cried lol

Are you crushing on anyone at the moment (celebrity or otherwise)?nope!

Talk about how your day wentmy day was alright, i’ve been bedridden due to my period all day! i cried because i lost the bag of m&ms i bought yesterday but i also ate breakfast for dinner so it was alright. relaxing.

Talk about your dreams/aspirations for the futureim in college majoring in political science. i’m considering double majoring in communications as well. i don’t quite know what i would like to do though. my only career goal is to help children that’s all i want to do. i want to help children and i want to be happy.

Least favorite gay celebrity?milo yiannopoulos

[elrieltinuviel]

All the questionssssss!!!!!!!!!

1. How do you define your sexuality?

Asexual

2. At what age did you first realize that you like girls?

like 5

3. How out are you?

Mostly, Don’t talk about it in person

4. At what age did you first come out?

18 or 19

5. Who was the first person you came out to? How did they take it?

I don’t remember

6. Has coming out lost you any friends?

No

7. What is your current relationship status?

Taken!

8. How many gay friends do you have?

I have mostly queer friends

9. How many male friends do you have?

3

10. Have you ever cut your hair super short?

sadly

11. How often do you wear flannel?

Once in a while

12. How much do you like cats?

Love cats!

13. Do you like skirts and dresses?

Kinda yeah

14. Do you like high heels?

Never worn them

15. Do you have any tattoos? If so, how many and where?

No :(

16. How accurate is your gaydar?

Not super

17. Have you ever been to a gay bar or a gay club?

Nah

18. How do you feel when plutonic female friends refer to each other as girlfriends?

Ew

19. Have you ever had a crush on a straight girl?

Lol hella

20. Ellen or Portia?

I don’t care

21. Is your nose pierced?

No

22 Would you ever want to get married?

yeeeeeee

23. Will you wear a dress for your wedding?

Maybe!

24. Would you ever want to give birth?

Fuck no, not that I could

25. Have you ever watched The L Word?

Nah

26. Have you ever dated a guy?

Nope

27. How do you feel when someone uses the word gay to mean stupid, dumb, or boring?

I don’t like it.

28. How many rainbow items do you own?

None I think :/

29. Have you ever been to a pride festival?

Not yet, was supposed to go last year and the year before to Boston Pride, never happened

30. Have you ever celebrated National Coming Out Day (October 11)?

I came out on Facebook to everyone on National Coming Out Day lol

31. Have you ever participated in the National Day of Silence?

No

32. Have you ever worn a woman’s suit?

I don’t understand, what makes a suit a women’s suit? I’ve worn a Men’s suit

33. Have you ever worn any men’s clothing?

Sadly for my own protection

34. Do you eat meat?

Ye!

35. Do you consider yourself a feminist?

Of course.

36. Who is your favorite LGBT celebrity?

Don’t have one, don’t really care about celebs too much

37. Are you religious at all?

A bit I suppose

38. How often do you find yourself trying to sneak a peak or staring at a cute female?

Fairly often, but I don’t stare anymore.

39. What is your ideal first date?

Depends on the person

40. Are you comfortable with terms such as lezzie, lesbo, or dyke?

Absolutely not.

41. How outdoorsy are you?

Less than I used to be

42. In general, has being out affected your relationships with other females?

No

43. How much makeup do you typically wear?

None

44. Have you ever been in a long distance relationship?

Yes, Its tough

45. Are you more feminine or more masculine?

Masculine :/ I don’t really know how to be feminine...

46. How long is the longest relationship you’ve been in? Are you still with that person?

A year and a half? Maybe only a year idk. No

47. Have you and a girlfriend ever been mistaken for sisters?

lol no

48. Do you think it is possible for someone to truly be a 50/50 bisexual, or is the percentage always skewed in favor of one gender?

Anything’s possible

49. Have you ever wished you were completely straight?

Back when I used to think I was

50. Do you watch any lesbian YouTubers?

Nah

51. Do you like wearing combat boots or Doc Martins?

Never have

52. Have you ever been hit on by another female?

Yes but they didn’t know I was a girl...

53. How athletic are you?

Not anymore

54. How many girlfriends have you had?

6? maybe 7. I mean I think technically only 5, but both NB partners went by/go by female pronouns

55. What is your opinion of septum/bull nose piercings?

Cute sometimes, depends on the face and jewelry really

56. What does equality mean to you?

Compassion and full rights for everyone regardless of anything. True proper equality, and the means to attain what you need with little to no effort.

57. If you are not a full blown lesbian, about what percentage of the time do you find yourself attracted to other females?

On occasion. I still have a lot of old prejudices I’m working on getting rid of, so that probably plays some part in that lack of attraction to people simply based on their appearance.

58. Have you ever shared clothes with a girlfriend?

No, I’m too big. I suppose some have take sweatshirts, but only for a bit

59. Have you ever liked or dated a girl with the same name as you?

Lol there are no girls with my name.

60. How flirty are you?

Not very, I don’t understand the cues well enough

61. Are you a virgin?

No.

62. Do you listen to any LGBT musicians such as Tegan and Sara, Melissa Etheridge, or Chely Wright?

Not that I know of

63. Have you ever been told that you are too pretty to be gay?

I’ve been told I’m too cute to be ace, does that count?

64. Have you ever been discriminated against because of your sexuality? If so, please explain.

I don’t think so.

65. Have you ever driven an SUV or a pickup truck?

Ye, I miss my SUV

66. Are you or have you ever been a tomboy?

No.

67. Agree or disagree: Everyone is at least a little bit gay.

I like to think the “default” is bisexual/pansexual, but I’m not sure.

68. What personality trait are you most attracted to?

Sense of humor I think

69. Boobs or butts?

Both???????

70. Beer or wine?

Cider!

71. Do you have a favorite lesbian movie?

No

72. From 1-10, how attractive are muscular women?

Aight for these I’m going with aesthetic attraction, not sexual.

8 or 4, depends on how muscular

73. From 1-10, how attractive are women who wear glasses?

5 (glasses do nothing for attraction for me, just means she can’t see)

74. From 1-10, how attractive are women who are covered with tattoos?

9 (tattoos are hot, I’m talking all forms of attraction here)

75. From 1-10, how attractive are curvy/plus-size women?

6 (one of those prejudices I’m working on)

76. From 1-10, how attractive are women with short hair?

7 (depends on the style)

77. From 1-10, how attractive are masculine butch women?

6

78. From 1-10, how attractive are highly intelligent women?

8

79. From 1-10, how attractive are tall women (i.e. around 6 feet or taller)?

8

80. Have you ever been on your period the same time as a girlfriend?

Lol I don’t have a uterus

81. Has a girl ever dumped you for a guy?

I think so?

82. Do you carry a purse?

Nah

83. Do you have any LGBT relatives?

Yes, a couple

84. Have you ever pretended to be completely straight?

Most of the time

85. Would you ever date a trans girl?

Someone being trans wouldn’t be the thing stopping me from dating them, so yes.

86. How well do you think LGBT women are portrayed in television?

Not so great.

87. Have you ever had a crush on a woman who’s much older than you?

How much older? I mean yeah, but its subjective.

88. Do you have any celebrity crushes?

Sure

89. Do you have any opinions on LGBT people in the military?

I don’t like the military in general, lets get that straight (lol) but if someone is risking their life for my protection, who am I to say they can’t? I sure the fuck wouldn’t do it.

90. Do you believe in love at first sight?

No

91. Would you ever have a threesome? If so, would a guy be included?

Lol no. I don’t really like sex as is

92. Where do you think is the best place to meet a potential lover?

No idea, the internet from my experience

93. Is there such a thing as “good” lesbian porn?

It’s more the home made stuff where people aren’t faking for their male viewers, And things can be fairly educational.

94. Have you ever had a one night stand?

No

95. How often do you wear a bra?

Never have I think

96. Have you ever been part of a softball team?

No

97. If you could live your life all over again, would you still be attracted to other women?

Yes.

98. What stereotype about LGBT women do you disagree with the most?

The one where “bi people are untrustworthy” and shit. Most of the ones about bi people, really. And that aces are selfish.

99. What advice would you give a girl who is struggling to figure out her sexuality?

Have patience, and its okay to be wrong. Don’t rush, you aren’t better that anyone else based simply on your sexuality, that literally doesn’t matter as far as who you are as a person, morally. You’ll figure it out someday. You aren’t “wrong” or “disgusting” or “broken” or “greedy”. You’re wonderful.

100. What advice would you give a girl who is struggling to come out?

Make it a pun if/when you do decide to. Make sure you’re safe, that’s most important. But definitely make it a pun.

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9/1/17, 1:04am - Girls, Fertility, Etc

Ok, computer’s tryna brick out on me so that’s a pain in the ass but I really wanted to write about this week before I got too far away from it because it was fucking incredible lol.

That date with Sally that I left off on ended up going absolutely phenomenally.  It almost crashed and burned though. Right when I got off work and we were supposed to meet up she stopped responding to me. I thought she pulled the dirtiest flakeout I’ve ever seen when I got around waiting for 45 minutes, but eventually she told me where to meet up with her lol. At her apartment complex I stood out in the lawn, waving at this cat that was on its hind legs staring at me through a glass door. As I’d wave it’d shimmy around. Such a cuuutey. She finally came outside after a bit, and she said she kind of wanted sushi which I was just going to suck up. But as we walked across the parking lot her dog freakkkkked out whining, it was so loud and tragic sounding that we decided to just stay in and get food delivered if we wanted it later. (We didn’t, probably should’ve, I hadn’t eaten all day lol) First I got to know her pets a bit. Her dog was rambunctious as fuck, and her cat was the calmest friendliest cat I’ve seen in a fucking minute. Like snuggling up on my hand licking me to pieces friendly. I fixed her dog’s collar, and she was kind of impressed immediately by how well I got along with both of them. I made us some coke and rum, we sat down and watched the tick and cuddled with her pupper in the dark for a while. After three episodes and three more coke and rums we were both pretty fucking tipsy and started to ignore the show in favor of just talking about shit. We were talking about chinese food (she loved that I’d tried all her favorites at Gourmet Kingdom), and religion and a whole bunch of stuff, tried to restart the show a few times, but got distracted making out instead lmao. We fucked on her couch. We both wanted to smoke one of her cigarettes but she didn’t have a lighter, so she dared me to run naked across her apartment complex parking lot to get one from my car. I popped outside and was immmeeddddiately almost spotted by this family of like 5 or 6 people that walked out at the same time. Hid behind a tree and tweeted about it lmfao.  So when I got back we sat outside on the porch, her on my lap, both of us naked smoking cigarettes and chatting about whatever. It was a beautiful fucking night. Then she invited me back to her bedroom and we had sex some more and passed out.

I woke up throwing up with a terrible hangover. Probably should’ve eaten something. She didn’t remember much, but we talked about how she had a good time and we want to see each other again. It’s just hard with my schedule taking up all my weekends. I guess we’ll see.

So Sunday I came back home, ate some wendy’s and nursed my hangover by finishing watching the tick (pretty solid, actually. Definitely enjoyed it). When I felt better I hit up Becky to see if she still wanted to hang out. She said she still wanted to, I went into the bathroom to wash up and found out Sally fucking chomppped my neck, gave me one of the biggest hickeys of my life lmfao.

Hanging out with Becky was awesome, too. We watched the new Death Note movie, and she’s really into horror movies so we watched Children of the Corn since neither of us had seen it. Went down on each other and went out to chipotle lol. While we were eating she told me that she does the same finger gun-point thing I do, and that apparently it’s a stereotypical bi thing. That’s fuckin neat/weird lmao. We went back to my place, watched the first episode of stranger things and then fucked a bunch, cuddled and talked about anime for a long time. Bonus self esteem points for a girl wanting to fuck the shit out of me totally sober lol.  I’m supposed to see her again tomorrow before I head out to work. Gonna go to her club meeting where she’s gonna teach me some japanese! Pretty fucking cool. Both of them are awesome. There’s no way this could backfire on me, right?!

lol anyway, Monday I went out to hang out with smith and dan all day. Smoked and played melee for hours. Got bodied in tournament, probably shouldn’t have entered lol it’s too hard to play high. I was like napping under a table. Hung out at smith’s that night playing rivals of aether and smoking, got caught up on Dragonball Super with him, was super cash. But the reason I stayed there was for my fertility test on tuesday! Almost fucking overslept and missed it lmao, but made it there late enough that they’d still see me (called ahead thank god lab appointments aren’t so strict). Got the results just a couple hours later and I’m sterile! Fucking made it, fam. No more pregnancy scares, nothin. So pumped actually lol. Hung out with Karn for a sec before heading back home to gboro. Was going to skip entering the tournament because I felt really off, but did anyway and managed to get fourth. Pretty neat, but missed making some money by thiiiis much lol. 

Went out to karaoke and smoked with some people out back again. People fucking love me there, I love greensboro so much. It’s like living in easy mode where everyone just thinks you’re great.  Actually for the first time someone hated me instantly it was this fat chick who was making these 4 bear pun jokes and I was reallllly stoned and just didn’t get it so I was like “why? Is it because you’re a bear?” and I snorted and she fucking gives me these Daggers and says “no it’s because my name is Panda, you fucking asshole.” lmao I guess my fat shaming comes out a little too easy.

There was also this suppppper plastered dude there who saw that me and this girl knew all the words to this song that someone was singing (I mean it’s karaoke people pick fucking popular songs), so he claps us both on the shoulders and he was like “HEY. Have you (points to girl) met him?” so we like semiawkwardly shake hands lol. Then he claps his arm around my shoulder and gives me this sly look and says “eh? I’m pretty good, huh?” I about laughed my ass off hahahah.  She was fairly cute. Had some acne, but a nice body. I thought she was going to have to hate me bc she was friends with that panda girl (which occurred afterwards) but then when she saw me sing she actually wanted to talk to me a bit. Complimented me a bunch, said I did great. I said I’m glad to hear it because i’m never really sure. And she said “well it doesn’t really take much to please this crowd.” I asked her what she did and she said wait tables, and I say yeah but what about for fun I think. She said Well I hate myself so I’m here most of the time. I Actually laughed my ass off that time. Was just like “same, tbh. Too me for me.” I’ve been getting drunk and saying ‘t.b.h.’ a lot like it’s a better word lmfao. Idk. her name’s mary though. I had hit up my gay queen friend Josh to see what he was up to, and he encouraged me to hit up the bar near my house to hang out with him and his friends. Is like referring to his friends as the queen’s guard and shit it’s all way too tryhard for me. We were gonna go party at someone’s house so he had me pick up a bunch of beer. Instead we went back to his place and had a really long heart to heart and made out for a while. He was a much better kisser than most guys and his lips were nice, but godddd fucking damn do I hate the roughness of dudes’ faces. I warned him a bunch of times that I was just teasing him and that we weren’t going to hook up, but he wanted me to stay and cuddle with him, so I did. He was talking shit saying he could beat me at smash bros, so I had to lmfao. We played a bunch and made out some more and he wanted me to give him a massage or some shit because I had been rubbing his shoulders earlier, but I wasn’t really having it. We ended up hanging out until like 7am so I was just like “alright nah I’ve gotta go to sleep now.” Then in the morning I said I had to go throw up and was going home even though he wanted me to stick around. It was honestly a pretty weird experience, not in that it was awkward that he wanted to hook up with me so bad, but moreso in that a lot of the things he said or did to try to get me to stay or hook up with him were like... literally the exact same kind of moves I had pulled with girls in the past. Like I heard my own words coming out of his mouth and that was very amusing. Like I literally laughed in his face when he was talking about some positive characteristic of my personality. I mean we did have a nice heart to heart about a lot of shit, but He kept saying shit like “i know we had a connection the moment I met you” and shit, and it made me think he was just trying too hard to see shit that wasn’t there. Acting like that other dude who wanted to hook up with me while I was stoned as balls. Maybe all dudes really are pigs? bahahaha. w.e.  Actually, nah. Like Josh’s friend Prevo or whatever was actually a super respectable dude, seems like he really cares about his daughter and everything. But at least most are. At least I am lmfao.

I remember I got some great hot dogs from this woman on the curb named cherl. Ball park franks. Delicious. I spent way too much fucking money celebrating my infertility that night hahahaha.

So the next day I took it easy. I really didn’t feel all that great, it wasn’t totally a lie to dip from Josh’s. So I sat around watching hearthstone and shit until I got motivated to watch Becky’s favorite anime. Kyoukai no Kanata (beyond the boundary) had me fucking hooked instantly. Was really good, binge watched it until like 630am. Then slept most of today.

And at work earlier I finally beat that hearthstone challenge thing I was working on the past two weeks too. Fucking luckedddd out it was super satisfying because I was like actually hating it intensely hahaha.

So this week was fucking prime. Always feels cool to be getting up to story worthy shenanigans. Excited to see Becky again tomorrow.

Something something motivational signoff. <3