#may the writjng gods have mercy on me

[galacticforces]

Amok

Spock's first pon farr, through the eyes of his father (I rewatched Amok Time and I had to wonder what his more immediate family thought of this. I might have to add Sarek's reaction to actually finding out what happened later.)

Sarek had, more often than he would care to admit to many, found himself missing the days when his youngest child was still young--the short time that their parental bond had been healthy. He mourned that loss of closeness now more than ever, as his son's majority finally approached. Spock may have hoped he would escape the Vulcan curse of madness. His mother may have even believed it was so. Sarek knew better.

No, no child of Vulcan was spared this, and his son, softened by humanity as he may be, would be no exception.

Were he able, he would have waited for his return all year, but his career demanded otherwise. Were their bond healthy, he would have been able to sense the coming fever in his son and return to meet him, to support him in his Time, in his final joining with T'Pring. But it was futile to dwell on that now.

As it was, his son was only barely present in his mind--Sarek could tell that he was alive and very little else. But even with so little connection, he could feel the very height of the fever.

He could not return home--could only stop and hope that things resolved successfully. But neither could he ignore the excruciating pain of his child. "My wife!" he called, somewhat urgently. And without another word, his Amanda knew. His gratitude for her nearly covered the burning, for a moment. She held him, and he hoped she would continue to do so for the days to come, until he could be certain the fever was waning and that their son's life was safe. But after only an hour, he was startled out of his ineffective meditation by a complete cessation of the feelings.

"Sarek?"

Her concern was obvious, and he shared it. Sarek's first thought was that his son had been killed. What else could put a stop to the fever so quickly, but to be defeated by a challenger? But no. No, he had not been struck by the absence of his child--only by the absence of the terror and need that accompanied pon farr. Perhaps, then, it was that an establishment of a complete mating bond had finally severed the remains of their parental bond? That wouldn't be entirely unheard of, in a bond so unnurtured as theirs.

But... Was that grief?

Sarek squeezed his wife's hand. "He lives. I do not know more than that, but I will make inquiries with our clan mother." He paused, shuddered, and took a steadying breath. No, he needed to meditate. Urgently. "In a moment. I would have you join me."

Her soft, relieved smile was a comfort, but her presence was even more so. They had not lost another child on this day, and they would need to be content with that.