#master kohga is a baby girl I suppose

[randomalistic]

He wants it SO bad.

[needs-to-stop-looking-at-yigas]

Can we get Sooga (and maybe Kohga) babysitting lil Tulin????

GET READY TO SEE THE GAYS BECOME DILFS, BITCHES.

“We came as soon as we saw your message.”

“Yeah, it was urgent! Where’s the fire?”

Teba turned as he saw Sooga and Kohga dash on into his home. He nodded at them.

“Yeah. Sorry. Was gonna ask Mipha, but she’s with her boy toy. Figured I’d trust you two instead.”

Teba took a step to the side, showing his son, Tulin, who was currently sitting on the floor, writing in his journal. Kohga cocked his head to the side, before shrugging.

“What? You want me to tell him to beat it? He a freeloader or what?”

“No. I need you two to chicksit for me. I’m taking Saki out, and I need someone to watch Tulin.”

Saki walked in just in time, adjusting her feathers.

“Teba, are you ready dear?”

“I’m ready, so long as these two are. So, how about it you two?”

Kohga was about to say ‘fuck no’, when he saw that look in Sooga’s eyes. He WANTED to do this, because he was a moron. Ugh. He sighed, before nodding.

“Fine. You two go and have fun, we got the little guy.”

Saki clapped her hands together, before leaning down to kiss Tulin’s head.

“Be good for Kohga and Sooga, my little nugget.”

“But not TOO good, kiddo.”

Teba patted his head, and Saki chuckled at the sight. She turned to the two yigas.

“Now, Tulin is supposed to be in bed by nine. No playing with Kass’s girls, as they’re supposed to be in bed, and they get into all kinds of mischief. That’s about it! Have fun you three, stay safe!”

Teba held his arm out for his lady, who giggled as she accepted it. Once they left, Sooga turned to Kohga.

“You didn’t want to do this. Why did you say yes?”

“Because YOU wanted to. And don’t look at me like that, you idiot.”

“I love you so much.”

“Tell someone who cares, moron.”

“You guys are weird.”

They both turned to look at Tulin, who was looking at them oddly. Kohga motioned to him.

“So...the fuck do we do with his white lookin’ ass?”

“Stop swearing, for one. It’s not good that he gets a pottymouth so early on. Two, we should properly introduce ourselves.”

Sooga walked over to him, kneeling down as he held out his hand.

“It is nice to meet you, Tulin. My name is Sooga, and that’s Kohga. How are you?”

Tulin put his book down, in order to stand up, and shake his hand properly.

“Hello! And good day!”

“What manners! And a good day to you too, little one.”

“My dad said good kids make good greeters!”

“God that’s a weird saying.”

Kohga sighed as he walked over to Teba’s hammock, before jumping into it, and getting himself nice and comfy. So comfy, he fell right to sleep. Sooga softly sighed. He loved his husband, very, very much.

“So. We have three hours until your bedtime, what would you like to-oh. You’re practicing your penmanship?”

Sooga looked over to the notebook on the floor, and Tulin nodded.

“Yep! Kheel has really pretty handwriting, I want mine to look good too! I wanna surprise her!”

“Huh. Why, if I didn’t know little one, I’d say that’s rather romantic.”

Tulin’s blush shone through his feathers, and he shook his head.

“N-no. She’s my friend, that’s it.”

“Uh huh, I see, I see,”

Sooga sat down next to Tulin, looking at the notebook.

“Regardless, I’d love to give you feedback. My father practiced calligraphy, I think I have a proper position on the matter.”

Tulin handed him his notebook, and Sooga skimmed through the pages. He nodded in approval.

“This is very nice! Have you shown your father?”

“No, just mom.”

“Why is that?”

Tulin shrugged, reaching up to grab his book again.

“It’s just a mom thing. Flight range and arrows are for me and dad, writing is for me and mom.”

Sooga nodded. Such a sweet, talented little boy.

“You have a good bond with your mother, little one.”

“Dad calls her a ‘worrybeak’, but yeah, I love my mom. Are you close with yours?”

Sooga froze. For a moment, he recalled her. Recalled her hair, her eyes, her smile. Her tears, her screams, her pain. His father holding onto her hand, his father scolding him for choosing to leave, using his mother’s name like a curse. A curse that cut into his hide like a-

“Yoohoo? Mr.Sooga?”

He suddenly snapped back into reality as Tulin waved his wing in front of his face. He cleared his throat, shaking his head.

“We...were. But she is no longer here.”

“Oh. I’m super sorry. What about your dad?”

“My father...wanted me to leave the nest, so to speak. But it’s fine. I’m loved enough.”

Tulin followed his gaze to Kohga, who gave his ass a good scratch. Tulin snickered, and Sooga couldn’t resist a small chuckle as well. Tulin put his book away, In order to look at his blades. The little rito was clearly very interested.

“Did he give you those swords?”

“No. Master Kohga did. Have you ever wielded a weapon before?”

“A bow and arrow, but never something cool like swords!”

Sooga thought about it for a moment. This child DID seem rather mature, despite his small size. Not to mention bows were just awful for up close combat. Against his better judgement, he decided to give the little one a gift.

“Would you like a present, Tulin?”

“YES! Please!”

Oh the way his little eyes shone in excitement. He pulled out something from his back, and placed it right into Tulin’s awaiting wings. A Vicious Sickle. Tulin looked it over in his hands, clearly in awe. Sooga chuckled, lightly patting his little bird head.

“It’s a light, easy to use weapon, with enough practice. It’s a wonderful starter weapon, and it never hurts to have extra protection. You will soon be the man of the house, you must learn to defend what is yours.”

“Woah! SO cool!”

Tulin was so excited, he started waving the damn thing around like a madlad. Even someone as calm as Sooga felt slightly panicked; for the only thing more dangerous than a blade, was an inexperienced hand. He grabbed onto Tulin’s hand, barely keeping himself from being cut.

“It IS cool. But what’s cooler is knowing how to use it. Would you like to learn?”

“Yes!! Please teach me! Please please please!”

“Very well. I should hope to be a good teacher to an eager student.”

Sooga held onto his hand, showing him the proper way to hold it; tightly, with the blade angled for a downward motion.

“Okay, I think I got it. Like this?”

“Perfect. Now, it’s a limber weapon, so if you need to move it in your hand, feel free to do so. Just be careful, it’s very easy to cut yourself. Now, let’s try to get a feel for it, shall we?”

Sooga stood up, and brandished one of his swords. He gave Tulin a moment to get his stance ready, before he let Tulin come at him. Course, he was very easy to block, but the point was so Tulin could feel comfortable holding it.

“Good, good. Side to side motions, just as you are.”

“It’s...kinda heavy, my arms hurt.”

“Suppose for your size, it’s not as limber as it is intended to be. Do your arms really hurt, or can you keep trying?”

“I...can keep trying, I think.”

“Good, a true fighter keeps going. Swing at me again.”

He noticed Tulin had to use almost both his hands as he swung. Poor thing was struggling. Light as his weapons were, Tulin was small. Determined, but very tiny. Still, he did rather well, all things considered. He blocked another blow rather easily.

“You aren’t uncomfortable around weapons. Good.”

“It’s usually bows, but training with my dad is a LOT like this.”

“Good of your father, teaching you to be comfortable with such a vital tool.”

He was about to do a mock swing, just to see if Tulin could dodge, when he saw Tulin was already weary, panting and even sweating a little. For living in a peaceful village, and armed with a bow and arrow, this WAS a lot of practice, especially from someone who was essentially a stranger. Sooga put his weapon away, and knelt down to Tulin.

“Why don’t we take a break? A weapon is useless without a body.”

“Okay...can we eat? I’m hungry.”

Sooga nodded, letting Tulin take the weapon, and sneak it into his own hammock. Tulin helped him find the cooking pot, and in a moment, Sooga had a fire going, and a few ingredients to throw inside.

“So, what are we hungry for?”

“I dunno, what can you make?”

“I suppose I can make poultry curry.”

“Oh! Yes! Do that one!”

Sooga nodded. He had no issues cooking the rice, and the chicken appropriately, and as soon as it was done, he handed a bowl to Tulin. Tulin dug into it hungrily, before slowly ceasing his eating. Sooga cocked his head down as the child stared at the bowl.

“What’s the matter?”

“I don’t like how it tastes. Super bland. I don’t wanna eat it.”

“God fucking dammit, Sooga, I can smell your shit cooking in my dreams.”

They both turned to look at Kohga, who had just woken up. He got out of the hammock, and walked over to the pot, taking the soup ladle to help himself to a taste. He then used it to smack Sooga on the back of his head.

“You. Cannot cook. I’d rather eat wet sand, at least THAT has salt.”

“I thought I was cooking it right-”

“Yeah right to hell. Fuck shit, move. What even is this?”

“Poultry curry.”

Kohga looked at him as if he had just gone insane.

“You’re...feeding chicken...to a baby chicken. That’s fucked up, Sooga.”

He was about to bitch at him some more, when Tulin nudged the bowl against Sooga. Kohga turned to look at him, and the little one was whimpering.

“Please fix it, I’m really hungry.”

“For the love of- fine. But only because I hate it when Sooga cooks.”

And Kohga did not disappoint. Not only did he fix Sooga’s awful poultry curry, he made the tastiest, sweetest egg pudding Tulin had ever tasted. The little one had two helpings of each, burping as soon as he was done. Kohga chuckled as he saw just how content the little guy was.

“Look at you, hungry fella. You need anything else, kid?”

“Uh huh. Can I please have some warm milk?”

“Sure, sure. I’ll make it just how my mom made mine.”

Tulin peered over as Kohga not only poured milk onto the pot, but cane sugar, courser bee honey, and even ground up some Chickaloo Tree Nuts. It made for a sweet, fragrant drink that Tulin accepted gleefully. He took one sip, and started kicking his little legs around wildly.

“This is SOOO good! This is WAY better than when mom makes it! Your mom is super cool!”

“She really was, she really was. Glad you like it, kiddo. Your turn, Sooga.”

Sooga didn’t LOVE sweets, but who was he to refuse such a treat from his Master? He accepted his own cup, took a sip, and found himself recalling...the good times. The times where he stood with his mother as they sipped tea, the times where she would get rid of his dirty, wet clothes, in order to get him warm and dry again. There was...only good in this drink, honestly. Sooga nodded, trying not to dwell so much on what was.

“I agree with Tulin. This is excellent. I’m surprised I’m just now trying it.”

“Eh, I only make it if I really need to go to bed. I usually make them with banana cookies-”

“Can you make those next time, please?!”

Tulin was practically giddy at the notion of more treats, and Kohga found it amusing. He patted Tulin’s head, nodding.

“Sure. Next time I’ll bring some over, just for you kid.”

“You’re SO cool!”

“I mean, I know that, but thank you.”

Kohga chuckled. He helped himself to his own drink, sighing in content. A nice, cold night, warmed by a nice fire, and some warm drinks. What more could one want? Sooga chuckled to himself, realizing he had downed nearly half of his cup. No wonder he was feeling so calm, so still.

“Thank you. I don’t think I’d know how to handle a hungry child who didn’t like my food.”

“That's why I’M the cook between us. Your food is so bland. I had half a mind to-”

He went silent, and Sooga saw why. Tulin had finished his drink, and had passed out, right into Kohga’s lap. Kohga struggled, clearly not knowing how to handle this, before groaning, and just patting the bird’s back, lulling him further into sleep. Sooga sat there for a moment, watching them. Kohga didn’t want children, but...they did like him. Found enough comfort in him to fall asleep on him, to cherish the plentiful meals he made them. Sooga even turned to look at his face, and caught him smiling oh so fondly at the little bird. Kohga seemed to catch his grin, and huffed.

“Hell you looking at?”

“I’m just. Seeing how wonderful you are with Tulin...and it really, really makes me realize; you’d make a wonderful, wonderful parent. You act so standoffish, but you...truly love taking care of children and-”

“God don’t you start that shit with me, Sooga.”

“I’m just saying! Family life might be for you! How do you know, you’ve never tried it!”

“Shut the hell up, you absolute fucking idiot.”

Sooga stopped for a moment as Kohga leaned into him, still keeping his hand on Tulin. Sooga looked down at these two, and was confident, more than ever, that he wanted a family. This feeling, that he was feeling right now, was something he desperately, terribly wanted. He wrapped his arm around Kohga, letting the dancing fire illuminate his features. He kissed the top of his head, softly sighing.

“I...love you. I love you so terribly much.”

------------------------------

“Sooga! Kohga! We’re ba-oh!”

Saki immediately silenced herself as she saw the little cuddle train that was happening here. Teba walked in behind her, chuckling at the sight. He nodded towards Sooga, who was too busy protecting them to sleep.

“Teba, Saki. How was your date?”

“Oh it was lovely, we went out to eat and everything. Quite sweet, honestly. Here, let me put him into bed, I’d hate for him to get a cramp, laying on the floor like that.”

Sooga, despite how it hurt his heart, let Saki take Tulin, and put him into his own little bed. Suppose that was his cue. He got up, carrying a sleeping Kohga in his arms. Teba nodded at him.

“Thanks for watching him. Hope he wasn’t too much for you two.”

“Not at all. You have a very wonderful, and very honest boy. You should be proud.”

“I am, I am, honestly. Especially if he made an impression on you.”

“I...hope this isn’t too much, but may we stay? I just, really wanted to-”

“What is this?”

They both turned to look at Saki, who was holding the vicious sickle in her hand. Teba winced, before shaking his head.

“yeah...I think staying is a really bad idea.”

Sooga looked at Saki, and shrugged.

“In my defense, he was excited to receive a present.”

So Sooga and Kohga weren’t ready to be dads.

Just yet, anyway.