#man I wish I have Outlast Trials to play with friends

[anintroverteddarling]

Might be too busy to upload the video I mentioned so Imma yeet some doodles I made at school ... ... ... I can't believe this is what I do when bored:

These are very cursed Eddie doodles because why not?

[brybryby]

I completely agree that Miles Upshore is queer, and Waylon is on the spectrum as well! If you have your friends analysis still plzzzzz link! I crave the content!!!

HI HI THANK YOU FOR THE ASK! 💜

I wish I had his analysis still!!! aarrrrgh it's been so long ;-; But I can try to relay some of the points he made (and add some of my own)!

This gets pretty lengthy so be prepared :')

I also added external links but they’re only there if you want to read more about the point I’m making! Feel free to skip them!

also // TW for mentions of SA

Miles

Story-wise, my friend found it interesting that Miles was the perfect host for the Walrider. Wernicke and Alan Turing were friends/lovers who worked on the technology that culminated into Project Walrider, so there's already a sense that the Walrider was founded on Wernicke and Turing's love for each other.

So, before I move on, I'll talk a bit about Alan Turing. In college, I had professors praise him for being the “Founder of Modern Computing”, cracking Nazi code, and also for being an advocate for gay rights.

More details here:

Out of every prominent scientist during the Cold War Era, Alan Turing was selected to play a role in Outlast's stories. And he didn't just happen to be openly gay—JT Petty purposefully made this significant to Wernicke's character. Not to mention, Wernicke made allusions to Frankenstein, allowing us to inspect the parallels between Wernicke & the Walrider with Frankenstein & Frankenstein's monster. When it comes to gothic & queer literature, Frankenstein is on the forefront of it, and I'm confident that JT Petty would be familiar with that (since he's a writer who's well-versed in horror/gothic art).

With Frankenstein, there's this idea to create life without heterosexual means (under the impression of cis-heteronormativity). Frankenstein's monster was also a sexualized creature—supposedly a representation of the “ideal man”—described as “beautiful”. Additionally, the novel was a critique of patriarchal norms through elements of sexualities. These aren't too different from Wernicke & the Walrider. The Walrider is arguably created through homosexual means in its abstract (Wernicke & Turing). This particular version of the Walrider that possesses Billy & Miles is stated to be the “masterpiece” by Simon Peacock—its appearance is also fairly sexual. And similarly, Outlast critiques patriarchal norms through its grotesque visuals of “masculinity”.

Frankenstein queer analysis:

Frankenstein sexual suppression analysis:

With all these story elements, there's certainly a queerness about the Walrider AND Outlast, which the devs openly embrace.

There's also many parallels between Frankenstein's monster and Miles. In the United States (and westernized countries in general), there are societal standards that function around cis-heteronormativity. Think of the traditional American nuclear family: A husband/father who's the breadwinner and patriarch, a loving wife/mother who cooks and stays at home to take care of the kids—they're mostly white, Christian, and American citizens. [WARNING: TRIALS SPOILERS AHEAD] The ideal American man is further illustrated in Officer Coyle's dialogue: “If only they were upstanding citizens like myself. Pay your taxes, do your job, fuck your wife, put a little something in the plate at service. America don't ask much.” Miles is arguably the antithesis of this, which is likely the reason he doesn't have any close friends/family—he was likely rejected by society. Frankenstein's monster follows a similar arc: he is also rejected by society and seeks refuge in seclusion. (The concept of “rejection by society” is inherent in queerness.)

With these parallels, it makes sense for Miles to be the ideal host for the Walrider. Additionally, Miles embodies queerness that isn't strictly homosexual—I mean his whole background/lifestyle is already, by definition, “queer”—but questions regarding his sexuality arise when inspecting other details of his character.

My friend pointed out the whole “Manhandler Hairspray for the Active Man” detail in Miles' apartment. There are a lot of homosexual undertones in the label, and it's hard not to think otherwise. “Manhandler” and “Active” are terms which indicate the “top” role in gay culture. I mean, it's possible that Miles is just embodying the “metrosexual” identity (basically straight men who embody characteristics associated with homosexuality) but metrosexuality is rooted in consumerism, which doesn't exactly align with Miles' character since he is openly critical of capitalism. I think the hairspray hints at queerness (or at least gender non-conformity).

Article on “metrosexuality”:

https://www.nytimes.com/2003/06/22/style/metrosexuals-come-out.html

The most revolutionary detail that my friend pointed out was the fact that Miles went out of his way to roast the ever-living shit out of everyone he came across at Mount Massive, begging the question: why is he so fixated on the appearances of other men? This could stem from his own insecurities of being rejected by society or insecurities of his own vanity (considering the hairspray he uses and the fact that he goes jogging…and if he's just trying to be healthy through exercise then he needs to explain his self-destructive alcoholism…idk…jogging for mental health? It’s open to interpretation…WAIT I mean he could just be keep up his physical fitness also with all the investigating he has to do anyways fjshshkdhd). It was just interesting that Miles was so fixated on physical appearances that it makes me wonder if he'd make similar comments about women—I don't believe he would and I'll explain below.

I know that we need to take Red Barrels' tweets with a grain of salt—they're known for deleting tweets that detail misinformation about the protagonists—but I find this tweet particularly interesting. I may be looking too much into it, especially since it's just a tweet and not presented in the games/comics, but it certainly is reflective of Red Barrels' values of respecting women and not viewing women as sexual objects, along with the notion of dismantling cis-heteropatriarchy/chivalry. It certainly doesn't mean he's not straight, but he doesn't particularly view women as sexual objects either (and I know that straight men are capable of not viewing women as sexual objects). Food for thought.

Some extra stuff:

Anti-conservatism and punk ideology (which Miles explicitly embodies) are pillars of queer culture in the political sphere.

The Germanic folklore, which the Walrider is based off of, exhibits notions of sexuality (though, probably not in the best light).

[TRIALS SPOILER] Wernicke’s dream therapy is associated with Dr. Easterman’s queerness—Easterman would be distracted by Wernicke’s handsomeness (and they both explicitly critique heterosexual relationships). Again, this supports the Walrider’s themes of sexuality.

Waylon

As for WAYLON, even though there isn't concrete evidence in the games to intentionally indicate queerness, that isn't to say he is entirely heterosexual (because assuming he's heterosexual is yet another product of the “ideal American man” image in a cis-heteronormative society, and Outlast's narratives are about dismantling this notion). In fact, now that you bring it up, I agree that Waylon can be considered on the queer spectrum/under the queer umbrella.

Regarding the “dismantling the ideal American man in a cis-heteronormative society” concept…the devs, artists, writer(s), actors, and contributors to the games' development are not only open/accepting of things outside of society's norms/expectations, but many are social activists. Chimwemwe Miller (VA for Chris Walker) is outspoken about being Black, Black history, and racism—he also narrated an audiobook which discussed racism, colonialism, & imperialism. Erika Rosenbaum (VA for Lynn Langermann) organized provisions for refugees and is active in environmental causes and feminism—she also spoke out during the #MeToo movement. Shawn Baichoo (VA for Miles, Waylon, & Blake) is also vocal about feminism/racism and was a huge advocate for his character Wrench's bisexuality from Watch Dogs 2, which became confirmed in a later installment of the Watch Dogs franchise.

I bring this up because Red Barrels actually entertains the idea of Waylon x Eddie (in the hypothetical that Eddie wasn't an antagonist like he was in the game…so like, erasing his problematic features baha…this deserves an analysis of its own) without mentioning sexuality or anything like that. Obviously, this can be seen as a way to entertain the fanbase, but I think it's worth mentioning that Waylon isn't opposed to homosexuality. After all, Waylon never makes homophobic remarks in his notes nor comments on male sexuality—he's just fearful of being assaulted (as anyone would be, regardless of gender/sexuality). He would, in fact, engage in a homosexual relationship according to this hypothetical.

(Note: the term “insane” is a harmful descriptor in this context, which is why I wrote “wasn’t an antagonist like he was in the game”)

So yea! I definitely think there's queerness with Waylon's character. And I don't exactly mean this to be “representation” because there's a lot of responsibility that comes with that, but ultimately I think it adds to what the franchise and the devs are trying to do—normalize queerness and dismantle the notion of the “ideal American man in a cis-heteronormative society” (and if you've studied socioeconomics/social theory, you know that this notion is a product of capitalism, which is another important theme in the franchise).

Here are some resources about the intersectionalities of cis-heteropatriarchy, capitalism, & queerness if you'd like to read more about it :)

(this one below is quite lengthy, but goes VERY DEEP)

All in all, my interpretation is that the franchise operates on the idea that “queerness” is normal or innate, but social structures are what label it otherwise. I've seen a lot of discussion surrounding Outlast characters' queerness, and it's interesting to me that the antagonists' sexualities get more attention amongst casual players than the protagonists' sexualities (and I think I can understand why, it's just a lot to unpack).

Just as many of the antagonists can be read as queer, the protagonists should arguably be read through the same lens. I truly do think Miles and Waylon (and even Lynn and Blake!) deserve to be inspected under queer lens. Doing so aligns with the franchise's philosophy/narratives. Also the idea of “queer characters taking down capitalism” is super empowering (and actually very identifiable hehe).

(Sorry, I think I projected a lot of my own personal values and biases into this post LOL hhhjdsfh feel free to critique anything I've written!)

This is my first time inspecting Waylon through a queer lens, so thank you for the ask!! I had a lot of fun writing this up :D

[litterateur97]

Lol 2023 has been a hell of a year, but I played so many incredible games this year! So I wanted to share a list of my top 10 favorite games I played this year!

10. Crab Champions

You get to be a crab! What's not to like? But seriously I've had a lot of fun playing this with my friends this year, and for an early access game they've done a good job of having a good bit of content!

9. Coffee Talk

This game was just so sweet. I loved getting to know all of the characters and their stories. I do wish it had been a little longer, but I know there is a part 2, so I'm excited to play that some day!

8. Unpacking

I absolutely love easy going games like this one. It was just oh so calming to play. Really hit the tism in the right places!

7. Cozy Grove

The coziest game. No but seriously it's so cute, very animal crossing like. There's only so much you can do each day, but I kind of like that. It's a game I won't play all night, but can play every day!

6. The Outlast Trials

Yet another early access game I played this year and man does this one actually scare me! I've played a lot of horror games and few have made me jump like this one. And I get to play with my friends and hear them scream too lol! I'm excited to see what they continue to add to this game!

5. Pathologic 2

I think this is the most stressed I've ever been playing a videogame ever lol! This game makes me second guess myself constantly and I still haven't finished it yet! But the story is fantastic. A game that makes you feel hopeless but still makes you want to play it!

4. We Were Here Forever

What an incredible conclusion to the We Were Here series! I have enjoyed all of the games, but this one really had the best puzzles and added so much to the story! And of all the finales to these games, this one was the best for sure!

3. Lethal Company

There's a reason it's gotten so big on TikTok, this game is so much fun! With the more company mod I've been able to play with so many of my friends and enjoy the utter insanity of it all! I may always die in this game, but at least I always laugh while playing lmao!

2. Hades

I've been wanting to play this one for a long time and I'm so glad I finally did! I'm not usually one for roguelite, but this game was incredible! I romanced all the romance options and got to be poly! I found my mom! I pet Cerberus so many times!! I died a lot before I finally beat Hades, but I got there eventually lol!

1. Baldur's Gate 3

There's a reason this won game of the year, it absolutely deserved it. I am 200 hours in and haven't beaten the game because there's so much content! So much to explore! So many wonderful companions, making it impossible to choose who to romance!!! (I romanced the twink, of course) I love this game. I may even love it more than Skyrim, a game I've put 1500 hours of my life into. I think bg3 is going to beat that.

[frankiefellinlove]

Anniversary of Danny’s death

Bruce’s tribute, long but wonderful! There are some great early e street adventures! Remembering Daniel Paul “Danny” Federici (January 23, 1950 Flemington, NJ – April 17 2008, New York City, NY)

FAREWELL TO DANNY “Let me start with the stories. Back in the days of miracles, the frontier days when "Mad Dog” Lopez and his temper struck fear into the band, small club owners, innocent civilians and all women, children and small animals. Back in the days when you could still sign your life away on the hood of a parked car in New York City. Back shortly after a young red-headed accordionist struck gold on the Ted Mack Amateur Hour and he and his mama were sent to Switzerland to show them how it’s really done. Back before beach bums were featured on the cover of Time magazine.

I’m talking about back when the E Street Band was a communist organization! My pal, quiet, shy Dan Federici, was a one-man creator of some of the hairiest circumstances of our 40 year career… And that wasn’t easy to do. He had “Mad Dog” Lopez to compete with… Danny just outlasted him. Maybe it was the “police riot” in Middletown, New Jersey. A show we were doing to raise bail money for “Mad Dog” Lopez who was in jail in Richmond, Virginia, for having an altercation with police officers who we’d aggravated by playing too long. Danny allegedly knocked over our huge Marshall stacks on some of Middletown’s finest who had rushed the stage because we broke the law by…playing too long. As I stood there watching, several police oficers crawled out from underneath the speaker cabinets and rushed away to seek medical attention. Another nice young officer stood in front of me onstage waving his nightstick, poking and calling me nasty names. I looked over to see Danny with a beefy police officer pulling on one arm while Flo Federici, his first wife, pulled on the other, assisting her man in resisting arrest. A kid leapt from the audience onto the stage, momentarily distracting the beefy officer with the insults of the day. Forever thereafter, “Phantom” Dan Federici slipped into the crowd and disappeared. A warrant out for his arrest and one month on the lam later, he still hadn’t been brought to justice. We hid him in various places but now we had a problem. We had a show coming at Monmouth College. We needed the money and we had to do the gig. We tried a replacement but it didn’t work out. So Danny, to all of our admiration, stepped up and said he’d risk his freedom, take the chance and play.

Show night. 2,000 screaming fans in the Monmouth College gym. We had it worked out so Danny would not appear onstage until the moment we started playing. We figured the police who were there to arrest him wouldn’t do so onstage during the show and risk starting another riot. Let me set the scene for you. Danny is hiding, hunkered down in the backseat of a car in the parking lot. At five minutes to eight, our scheduled start time, I go out to whisk him in. I tap on the window. “Danny, come on, it’s time.” I hear back, “I’m not going.” Me: “What do you mean you’re not going?” Danny: “The cops are on the roof of the gym. I’ve seen them and they’re going to nail me the minute I step out of this car.” As I open the door, I realize that Danny has been smoking a little something and had grown rather paranoid. I said, “Dan, there are no cops on the roof.” He says, “Yes, I saw them, I tell you. I’m not coming in.” So I used a procedure I’d call on often over the next forty years in dealing with my old pal’s concerns. I threatened him…and cajoled. Finally, out he came. Across the parking lot and into the gym we swept for a rapturous concert during which we laughted like thieves at our excellent dodge of the local cops. At the end of the evening, during the last song, I pulled the entire crowd up onto the stage and Danny slipped into the audience and out the front door. Once again, “Phantom” Dan had made his exit. (I still get the occasional card from the old Chief of Police of Middletown wishing us well. Our histories are forever intertwined.) And that, my friends, was only the beginning.

There was the time Danny quit the band during a rough period at Max’s Kansas City, explaining to me that he was leaving to fix televisions. I asked him to think about that and come back later. Or Danny, in the band rental car, bouncing off several parked cars after a night of entertainment, smashing out the windshield with his head but saved from severe injury by the huge hard cowboy hat he bought in Texas on our last Western swing. Or Danny, leaving a large marijuana plant on the front seat of his car in a tow away zone. The car was promptly towed. He said, “Bruce, I’m going to go down and report that it was stolen.” I said, “I’m not sure that’s a good idea.” Down he went and straight into the slammer without passing go. Or Danny, the only member of the E Street Band to be physically thrown out of the Stone Pony. Considering all the money we made them, that wasn’t easy to do. Or Danny receiving and surviving a “cautionary assault” from an enraged but restrained “Big Man” Clarence Clemons while they were living together and Danny finally drove the “Big Man” over the big top. Or Danny assisting me in removing my foot from his stereo speaker after being the only band member ever to drive me into a violent rage. And through it all, Danny played his beautiful, soulful B3 organ for me and our love grew. And continued to grow. Life is funny like that. He was my homeboy, and great, and for that you make considerations… And he was much more tolerant of my failures than I was of his. When Danny wasn’t causing chaos, he was a sweet, talented, unassuming, unpretentious good-hearted guy who simply had an unchecked ability to make good fortune and things in general go fabulously wrong. But beyond all of that, he also had a mountain of the right stuff. He had the heart and soul of an engineer. He learned to fly. He was always up on the latest technology and would explain it to you patiently and in enormous detail. He was always “souping” something up, his car, his stereo, his B3. When Patti joined the band, he was the most welcoming, thoughtful, kindest friend to the first woman entering our “boys club.” He loved his kids, always bragging about Jason, Harley, and Madison, and he loved his wife Maya for the new things she brought into his life. And then there was his artistry. He was the most intuitive player I’ve ever seen. His style was slippery and fluid, drawn to the spaces the other musicians in the E Street Band left. He wasn’t an assertive player, he was a complementary player. A true accompanist. He naturally supplied the glue that bound the band’s sound together. In doing so, he created for himself a very specific style. When you hear Dan Federici, you don’t hear a blanket of sound, you hear a riff, packed with energy, flying above everything else for a few moments and then gone back in the track. “Phantom” Dan Federici. Now you hear him, now you don’t. Offstage, Danny couldn’t recite a lyric or a chord progression for one of my songs. Onstage, his ears opened up. He listened, he felt, he played, finding the perfect hole and placement for a chord or a flurry of notes. This style created a tremendous feeling of spontaneity in our ensemble playing. In the studio, if I wanted to loosen up the track we were recording, I’d put Danny on it and not tell him what to play. I’d just set him loose. He brought with him the sound of the carnival, the amusements, the boardwalk, the beach, the geography of our youth and the heart and soul of the birthplace of the E Street Band.

Then we grew up. Very slowly. We stood together through a lot of trials and tribulations. Danny’s response to a mistake onstage, hard times, catastrophic events was usually a shrug and a smile. Sort of an “I am but one man in a raging sea, but I’m still afloat. And we’re all still here.” I watched Danny fight and conquer some tough addictions. I watched him struggle to put his life together and in the last decade when the band reunited, thrive on sitting in his seat behind that big B3, filled with life and, yes, a new maturity, passion for his job, his family and his home in the brother and sisterhood of our band. Finally, I watched him fight his cancer without complaint and with great courage and spirit. When I asked him how things looked, he just said, “what are you going to do? I’m looking forward to tomorrow.” Danny, the sunny side up fatalist. He never gave up right to the end.

A few weeks back we ended up onstage in Indianapolis for what would be the last time. Before we went on I asked him what he wanted to play and he said, “Sandy.” He wanted to strap on the accordion and revisit the boardwalk of our youth during the summer nights when we’d walk along the boards with all the time in the world. So what if we just smashed into three parked cars, it’s a beautiful night! So what if we’re on the lam from the entire Middletown police department, let’s go take a swim! He wanted to play once more the song that is of course about the end of something wonderful and the beginning of something unknown and new. Let’s go back to the days of miracles. Pete Townshend said, “a rock and roll band is a crazy thing. You meet some people when you’re a kid and unlike any other occupation in the whole world, you’re stuck with them your whole life no matter who they are or what crazy things they do.”

If we didn’t play together, the E Street Band at this point would probably not know one another. We wouldn’t be in this room together. But we do… We do play together. And every night at 8 p.m., we walk out on stage together and that, my friends, is a place where miracles occur…old and new miracles. And those you are with, in the presence of miracles, you never forget. Life does not separate you. Time does not separate you. Animosities do not separate you. Death does not separate you. Those you are with who create miracles for you, like Danny did for me every night, you are honored to be amongst. Of course we all grow up and we know “it’s only rock and roll”…but it’s not. After a lifetime of watching a man perform his miracle for you, night after night, it feels an awful lot like love. So today, making another one of his mysterious exits, we say farewell to Danny, “Phantom” Dan, Federici. Father, husband, my brother, my friend, my mystery, my thorn, my rose, my keyboard player, my miracle man and lifelong member in good standing of the house rockin’, pants droppin’, earth shockin’, hard rockin’, booty shakin’, love makin’, heart breakin’, soul cryin’… and, yes, death defyin’ legendary E Street Band.“

[thepalewolfhowls]

Taria Fletcher:  Extended

Character Chart 

Character’s full name:  Taria Fletcher

Reason or meaning of name:  Her forename came from a book, with a reason only her mother knows.  Her surname came from her step-father, and she wears it with pride.

Character’s nickname:  Ri

Reason for nickname:  Taria is a very human name.  During her stay in Durotar, she shortened it down and it seems to have stuck.

Birth date:  April 15th

Physical appearance

Age:  20

How old does he/she appear:  20

Weight:  165 lbs

Height:  5′11″

Body build:  Athletic, Muscular

Shape of face:  Square

Eye color:  Piercing Blue

Glasses or contacts:  None

Skin tone:  Tanned

Distinguishing marks:  Claw marks across her face, gash in her hip, slight skin discoloration around her arms, thighs, torso, and hips.

Predominant features:  Besides the facial scarring, her eyes, light against her darker colorations.

Hair color:  Black

Type of hair:  Thick, straight

Hairstyle:  Typically worn up in a high ponytail with a few braided strands.  Occasionally decorated with beads or feathers.

Voice:  Jennifer Hale (Shepard, usually angry)

Overall attractiveness:  She’s probably kinda pretty.  Underneath that gashed up face anyway.

Physical disabilities:  None

Usual fashion of dress:  A lot of leather, whether armor or casual clothing.  Previous orcish-style in combat, these days, its typically human-crafted plate.

Favorite outfit:  Casual leathers, loose-fitting tank-tops

Jewelry or accessories:  A sharp tooth hangs from a leather cord around her neck.  A silver ring with a red jewel and a sword carved beneath the gem.  Does a sword count as an accessory?

Personality

Good personality traits:  Loyal, laid-back (usually), honorable, snarky

Bad personality traits:  Heavy temper, brash, obnoxious

Mood character is most often in:  Mellow or angry.  There aren’t often in-betweens.

Sense of humor:  She likes taking jabs at people who deserve it.

Character’s greatest joy in life:  Battle.  Nothing in this world makes her feel more alive or alleviates more of her problems than the thrill of a good fight, be it a bar brawl or a full-on combat assault.

Character’s greatest fear:  Losing her will or her mind.

Why?  There was once a time she was not in control of herself.  An assault from a selfish mage that left her reeling for nearly half a year.

What single event would most throw this character’s life into complete turmoil?  That’s a tough one.  Obviously losing her free will.  But less obviously I suppose would be the inability to further communicate with those in Kalimdor that she considers friends.

Character is most at ease when:  She’s riding her motorcycle or fishing.

Most ill at ease when:  She can’t understand a language or catch on to what people are talking about.  Frustrates the hell out of her.

Enraged when:  There’s a long list.  She hates being lied to or used.  When someone is attacking an innocent or in a dishonorable fashion.

Depressed or sad when:  She doesn’t get particularly sad often.  Sometimes thinking of Jedrek still gets to her, but overall, she’s just not a very sad person.

Priorities:  Family, friends, honor.  Not necessarily in that order.

Life philosophy:  If you can’t punch your problems, you’re shit outta luck.

If granted one wish, it would be:  Hm...She’d like to meet her father.  Barring that, being an orc would be nice.

Why?  Her father was a great warrior.  She sometimes wonders what he’d think of her.  As far as being an orc?  Come on.  Bigger, stronger, what’s not to want?

Character’s soft spot:  Hawke, that loveable ass.  And his daughter.  She also has a bit of a soft spot for receiving flowers.  But only from him.  Probably.

Is this soft spot obvious to others?  Considering she hasn’t left him or beaten him to a pulp, she thinks its pretty obvious.

Greatest strength:  Endurance.  Taria has a fair amount of physical power for her build and race, but her true strength lies in simply outlasting her enemy.

Greatest vulnerability or weakness:  Taria is extremely susceptible to battle rage.  The longer she fights, the less she thinks.

Biggest regret:  Running away from Jedrek.  Allowing him to die without her there.  As cruel and selfish as he was and as much as she hated him, she had also loved him deeply.

Minor regret:  Getting knocked up.  As excited as she is now, she knows that a child is more responsibility than she can likely bare.  The only thing keeping it from being a major regret is the system of support around her.

Biggest accomplishment:  Joining the Wolves.  As silly as it might sound, and as little as she has been involved, joining the military group was the first step in getting her life on track and it means a great deal to her.

Minor accomplishment:  Ripping the door off of Hót Shóts Inn.  She was nearly 20 weeks pregnant and that door was on there pretty good.  Even managed to chuck it into the lake.  To be fair, Jake called her fat.

Past failures he/she would be embarrassed to have people know about:

Losing herself to Jedrek, pretty self-explanatory.

Why? No one wants to admit to being manipulated by and falling in love with an abuser.

Character’s darkest secret:  Hm...Dark secrets, not so much.  The identity of her father is the most buried one.

Does anyone else know?  Her mother (obviously), step-father, and a small handful of people close to her mother..

Goals

Drives and motivations:  Making her father and step-father proud.  Sometimes those things don't always balance out.  The small family she’s building with Hawke and Emily.

Immediate goals:  Getting through this pregnancy.

Long term goals:  Carving her place in this world.  Even if she doesn’t reach ‘warrior of legend’, she wants her trials and conquests to be told across the ages.

How the character plans to accomplish these goals:  The Wolves are a good start.  Give her some discipline.  Only war will bring out her capabilities.  That will be the true test.

How other characters will be affected:  Depends on which side of the battlefield they’re on.

Past

Hometown:  Her mother moved around a lot, so there’s no real place she called home until recently.

Type of childhood:  Taria’s childhood was both lonely and full of company.  Her mother frequented taverns for work and moved them around Azeroth, so she never had the stability of a proper home.  She was often left with innkeepers or friends of her mother while she was away, and it wasn’t uncommon for her to go days without seeing her.  She had quite a few hobbies, however, and made friends with some of the other children around, even if she wasn’t there for long.

Pets: None.

First memory: Trying to jump over a glass coffee table and splitting her chin open.

Most important childhood memory:  The tiger attack that took her from her mother.

Why:  It changed her life completely.  She was given to a man who would save her life, but at the cost of being indentured to him.  That attack also made her realize just how much she could live through, as her body was crushed by the weight of the beast as it lunged at her.  It also gave her the scars across her face, and the pride that has accompanied them.

Childhood hero:  Lo’Gosh, Crimson Ring Champion.

Dream job: Gladiator

Education:  She learned a bit from her mother and from various people she stayed with, but she never was really much for books.

Religion: Never really had one growing up, though she did learn a bit about the Ancients.

Finances:  Her mother always had plenty of money.  She never wanted for anything.

Present

Current location:  Surwich

Currently living with:  Her stolen wolf pup, Karg’rok.  Less of a pet and more of a companion, you see.

Pets: Pet is not the right word for Karg’rok.  At all.

Religion:  She admires the Ancient, Goldrinn, and places an offering at his shrine every few months or before she heads into battle.

Occupation:  Private in the Alliance Military

Finances:  Hm....her mother handles all of that.

Family

Mother:  Tarvasha Winterscale

Relationship with her:  Strained

Father: (Step) Jake Fletcher

Relationship with him:  She looks up to him, in a way.  He’s been the only real father-figure in her life and, surprisingly, a better parental figure than her mother.

Siblings:  None living (and she is unaware regardless)

Relationship with them:  N/A

Spouse:  (Boyfriend)  Shepherd Hawkens

Relationship with him/her: Pretty good, though they tend to worry each other a lot.

Children:  An unborn daughter.  She’s pushing for the name Accalia.

Relationship with them:  She’s not really certain how to feel.  Sometimes she’s excited.  Sometimes she’s downright terrified.

Other important family members:  While not technically family, she shares a strong bond with an orc veteran named Grok’tor.

Favorites

Color:  Red

Least favorite color: Hm...White, maybe?  Or that light grey that looks white but isn’t actually white and its infuriating as all hell.

Music:  Heavy orcish chanting and drumming.  Other than that, anything with a heavy beat and a lot of fast strings.  Tauren Chieftains and Blight Boar come to mind.

Food:  Meat, particularly boar.  She loves her ribs.

Literature:  Taria isn’t really much for books, though she has been learning about the history of Stormwind and the Alliance.

Form of entertainment:  Brawling, fishing, drinking

Expressions:  That look in someone’s eye when they are just itching to start a fight, and that look of surprise when they realize you have the upper hand.

Mode of transportation:  She loves her bike from Jake.  Its fast and loud.  

Most prized possession:  Her father’s sword.  She carries it everywhere.  Its practically a part of her.

Habits

Hobbies:  Fishing, she’s slowly learning to cook.  Uh...Does punching count as a hobby?  No?  Camping, maybe.

Plays a musical instrument?  She can keep a beat on a drum.  That’s about it.

Plays a sport?  Does pit fighting count?

How he/she would spend a rainy day:  Out in the rain, of course.  Durotar is a very dry place.  Rain was always welcome.  Her love of it carries over even in the Eastern Kingdoms where it is more plentiful.

Spending habits:  Outside of necessities, Taria doesn’t really spend a lot of money.  There’s nothing she really needs that costs more than the essentials.

Smokes:  Nope

Drinks:  Often.  When not pregnant, of course.  

Other drugs:  She was on a few heavy ones for a while after Jedrek.  She’s since gotten clean.

What does he/she do too much of?  These days?  Wandering.

What does he/she do too little of?  Actually being fucking productive.

Extremely skilled at: Close combat brawling and melee fighting, holding her liquor.

Extremely unskilled at:  There’s a laundry list.  Cooking comes to mind.  

Nervous tics:  Chews her lip while thinking or uncertain.

Usual body posture: Relaxed, confident

Mannerisms:  Laid-back or volatile.  Not often are there in-betweens.

Peculiarities:  Since she spent a good two years in Durotar, she’s very heavily-spoken.  She also growls a lot.

Traits

Optimist or pessimist?  Probably an optimist.

Introvert or extrovert?  Kinda in between.  She doesn’t seek company a lot of times, but won’t avoid it either.

Daredevil or cautious?  Daredevil, though she’s becoming more cautious with time.

Logical or emotional?  Emotional

Disorderly and messy or methodical and neat?  Uh...She should probably clean her house more often.

Prefers working or relaxing?  Working

Confident or unsure of himself/herself?  Confident, overall, but there are moments.

Animal lover?  Depends.  She likes big, powerful beasts like wolves.  Really fucking hates tigers.

Self-perception

How he/she feels about himself/herself:  She wants to be better and hates being stuck in a rut.  This last year has been hard on her and completely changed her perception of herself and the world around her.

One word the character would use to describe self:  Hm....Rough.

One paragraph description of how the character would describe self:  "I don’t like dealing with dishonorable folk or their bullshit.  If you lie to me, I’ll make you wish you hadn’t.  Uh...I guess I’ve got a bit of a temper.  Probably shouldn’t get in so many fights.  Getting better about that.  Things were a lot easier in Durotar.  I guess I’ve got people to care about now...Who’d’ve thunk it?”

What does the character consider his/her best personality trait?  She’ll fight for those she cares about, even if it means getting into shit she really shouldn’t.

What does the character consider his/her worst personality trait?  That temper is a bit of an issue sometimes.  Other than that, she sees herself as a bit lazy lately.

What does the character consider his/her best physical characteristic?  Her scars.

What does the character consider his/her worst physical characteristic?  She’s too small.

How does the character think others perceive him/her:  Hot-headed, uncertain.  Jake probably thinks she’s a dumbass.

What would the character most like to change about himself/herself:  She wants that old drive back.  That strength of mind that came from thinking herself invincible.

Relationships with others

Opinion of other people in general:  Depends on the people.  Some are jackasses who need a good fist to the face.  Others are alright.

Does the character hide his/her true opinions and emotions from others?  Not typically.  She’s a very honest person, and her emotions have a habit of making themselves known.  She’s also a terrible liar.

Person character most hates:  Jedrek, the mind-lingering ass.  

Best friend(s):  Grok’tor, Nix (its a strained relationship, really).

Love interest(s):  Shepherd Hawkens

Person character goes to for advice:  Jake.  Occasionally her mother.

Person character feels responsible for or takes care of:  Hawke.  Also her mother.

Person character feels shy or awkward around:  It was Hawke for a while.  He was the first person to flirt with her at length, after all.

Person character openly admires:  She admires quite a few of the Wolves.  They’re good, strong folk and she feels better for knowing them.

Person character secretly admires:  Jake.  Don’t tell him.  She’ll never live it down.

Most important person in character’s life before story starts:  Grok’tor, Nix, her mother.

After story starts:  Her mother, Jake, Hawke, Jedrek, there are likely others.

@jakefletcher @wrynns-wolves @korbintavernack for mentions.

[godsavetheq]

1-30 c;

*GALE FORCE SIGH COMES IN FROM CENTRAL PENNSYLVANIA*

1: Do you try to stay away from walkthroughs?

Yes. I want to win through my own merit. But I need that old ass game guide magazine for Perfect Dark because I want to unlock all the things and beat all the things (Perfect Dark will be a recurring theme from start to finish so buckle up)

2: Company you're always loyal to?

For consoles, Sony for the most part. XBox is the devil. But I do most of my gaming on PC these days. 

For games, the Creative Assembly (which makes the Total War series of grand military strategy games). Although my loyalty is being tested because their cranking out fantasy Warhammer: Total War games like hotcakes now, presumably because their SEGA corporate overlords like the money they’re making off them. Though apparently they have a separate team that’s pretty far into developing the next historical Total War game so I’ll come back around when that comes out, probably.

3: Best game you've ever played?

What a hard question. You know I have 111 games in my Steam library? We’ll say 100 because some of those are like expansions of other games or test servers of WIP games. So 100 games just on PC, plus god knows how many PS1, PS2, PS3, PS4, N64, GameCube, and Wii games I’ve played. It comes to a point where I can’t objectively single out one game from all of my favorites, so I’ll take “best” as meaning like highest production quality and best execution of the game, and I’ll hand it to Resident Evil 7. So professional, so fun... so Shoney’s.

4: Worst game you've ever played?

Shower With Your Dad Simulator 2015. Yes that’s a real game, it costs like $1 and someone bought it for me on Steam and it is the simplest, stupidest game that it probably belonged on a free online game site to justify its existence in some way.

5: A popular series/game you just can't get into no matter how much you try?

Well there’s a lot of popular games that I can’t get into, but that’s partially because I’ve internalized that I hate them without having given them much of a chance (looking at you, Dota, League of Legends, Overwatch (Or as we in the trade call it, “$40 Team Fortress 2″))

But now that I think of it, World of Warcraft. I got my free trial and played it some with Perry & Good Old Boys™ from Steam, but I just did not enjoy myself. I also had a prejudice against this one before I played it but at least I tried it and confirmed that I didn’t like it.

6: A game that's changed you the most?

Fallout series I guess. Kind of got me into post-apocalyptic stuff, RPGs and the like. Kind of opened the door for fantasy for me somewhat. I generally don’t like fantasy and I like to make the distinction between sci-fi and fantasy to justify my liking Fallout but truthfully half of the shit in Fallout is too over-the-top to qualify as like realistic fiction. Still haven’t played Skyrim because it’s too fantasy, but I’d at least consider it because it’s not all that different from Fallout if I’m willing to excuse the magic and shit.

7: A game you'll never forget?

Surgeon Simulator. What a titan of ridiculously clunky medical malpractice. 

The Stanley Parable because that game messes with you and is comedy gold

POSTAL 2 because rarely does a game execute low-quality production and lack of taking itself seriously so beautifully 

Hotline Miami because it fucks with you even worse than the Stanley Parable. I mean seriously, what a rollercoaster ride of mental fuckery. Am I a good guy? Am I a bad guy? All I know for sure is I’m killing a copious amount of Russian mobsters while masked figures in my head whisper nonsense at me and everywhere I go I see my dead best friend and........

Rollercoaster Tycoon (the old one for like Windows 98) because muh childhood

Destroy All Humans! 2 because they just don’t make any alien games that compare to it. Also muh childhood.

KHOLAT because it’s like a clinic in how to do horror right. And it came out at a time when it was a sad time to be a horror fan because Resident Evil was all “hurr durr our games need to be like Call of Duty” and there were no new Silent Hill, Outlast, or Slender games coming out. Of course eventually Resident Evil got good again, Outlast 2 came out, Silent Hills was SUPPOSED to come out (RIP)

Kerbal Space Program. I held out on this one for so long because I was turned off by the little green alien people and I figured it wasn’t serious. But holy fuck it’s actually like the best simulation of running a space program and designing rockets and shit oh my god like they train Astronauts with that game no lie.

8: Best soundtrack?

Slender: The Arrival. Honorable mentions go to Hotline Miami and Supreme Ruler: Cold War

9: A game you turn your volume off every time you play it?

None

10: A game you've completely given up on?

Five Nights at Freddy’s, like, all of them. I can’t beat all of the levels in any of them. I beat the five nights in the original FNaF but not the edgy sixth night. Didn’t even get that far in the second or third. Kinda lost track of which is which too...

11: Hardest game you've played?

Fucking Perfect Dark. I’ve been playing that game effectively for my entire conscious life and only just this summer have I begun to win A FEW levels on Perfect Agent difficulty. For context, I beat the entire game on Special Agent difficulty years ago, but at the time, I could not even beat the first level on Perfect Agent. 

12: Shortest time you've beaten a game in?

When I got GTA V for Christmas several years ago I did almost nothing but play it all day every day and beat it in a few days.

13: A game you were the most excited for when it wasn't released yet?

Probably Total War: Rome II. Honorable mentions go to Saurian, Resident Evil 7, Silent Hills (RIP)

14: A game you think would be cool if it had voice acting?

I dunno, I feel like most games that SHOULD have voice acting DO have voice acting. Nothing comes to mind.

15: Which two games do you think would make an awesome crossover?

I got nothing.

16: Character you've hated most? From what game?

I have to do it. Ashley from Resident Evil 4. I don’t care if you are the President’s daughter, you are useless and annoying.

17: What game do you never tell people you play?

I mean, games that I don’t like I guess.

18: A game you wish your friends knew about?

I got nothing, my friends know about most such things.

19: Which game do you think deserves a revival?

Spore, 100%. Nobody before or since has saw to completion a game where you literally design your own organism from a microscopic sea creature, evolving onto land, gaining sentience, building a civilization, uniting your planet and pushing out into space to build a space empire. It deserves to be remade, and done right this time.

20: What was the first video game you ever played?

The first REAL video game was GTA 3, but I may have played something stupid before that.

21: How old were you when you first played a video game?

I dunno, young.

22: If you could immerse yourself in any game for one day, which game would it be? What would you do?

Kerbal Space Program. I’d finally make that manned mission to Duna (Mars), baby. It has eluded me for so long, and to see it with my own eyes... 10/10

23: Biggest disappointment you've had in gaming?

Rome Total War - Alexander expansion. It seemed like such a simple thing. Make an expansion for Rome Total War about Alexander’s Empire. It was the most pitiful thing I’d ever seen. I mean, I know the original Rome Total War is old as dirt, but the base game and the Barbarian Invasions expansion were pretty good.

24: Casual, Hardcore, or in the middle?

In the middle. I tryhard sometimes and just fuck around other times.

25: Be honest; have you ever used cheats (like ActionReplay or Gameshark)?

I mean... do the cheats in GTA 3 count that spawn a bunch of guns and tanks for you? I didn’t use them to beat the game, I just wanted to fuck around because that’s the best way to play GTA 3 :P

26: Handheld or console?

Given those choices, console. Never was too into handhelds after Gameboy Advance. I had a DS Lite and was into Scribblenauts on that for a while, but since then, nah.

27: Has there ever been a moment that has made you cry?

Don’t think so, but it hit me in the feels when John Marston got killed by the crooked wild west cops in Red Dead Redemption.

28: Which character's clothes do you wish you owned the most?

The only thing that comes to mind is Trent Easton from Perfect Dark because he has like a fucking red velvet suit and it’s so ridiculous like he’s the head of the NSA you’d think he’d wear a black suit but no, bright red. I’ll take 20.

29: Which is more important, gameplay or story?

Don’t make me choose. Depends on the game I guess. I like Perfect Dark despite the fact that its storyline is an incoherent mess. Try to follow along.

It involves a plot between Cassandra de Vries, owner of a shady arms manufacturing corporation with private paramilitaries on the march in every corner of their corporate HQ as well as all over the city streets (I, too, voted for Trump so that he could legalize corporate-owned private armies) that also has a massive underground research lab hidden inconspicuously under the city of Chicago; Trent Easton, the fashionable Director of the National Security Agency, whose goons start shooting up Air Force One in a plot to kidnap and clone the President of the United States, and a mysterious tall blonde man known only as Mr. Blonde who wears evil clothes and, unbeknownst to the other two conspirators, is a massive alien dinosaur thing that sounds like a jaguar in disguise who eventually kills both of them once they’re no longer useful. But don’t worry! The plot to give the dinosaur aliens a super-weapon fails when some guy sends his on-staff professional mass-murderer to go kill endless corporate militias and NSA agents to get to the bottom of it with the help of a flying laptop that has developed a moral code and a different race of aliens who look much less impressive. Or something. So that game makes a compelling case against storyline, but in other cases it’s not so XP

30: A game that hasn't been localized in your country that you think should be localized?

Everything that I care about is localized to the US.

[bookandcover]

I was so excited to read this book upon its release, and then I didn't get to it for months! As I told a childhood friend in a text message, I think this book is what I was waiting for for about 10 years without actually knowing it. I absolutely loved Garth Nix’s books as a teenager and re-read the Abhorsen trilogy multiple times. The trilogy ends on a tantalizing note in terms of Lirael and Nick’s charged, potential relationship. When Clariel was released, I was disappointed to see that it would be a prequel, rather than continuing the plot after Abhorsen. I think there's part of me that assumed Garth Nix would never extend the story beyond the original trilogy. Every few months, Lirael and Nick, Sabriel and Touchstone would cross my mind and I’d Google whether or not there would be a new book, but without real hope.

As a teenager, I appreciated Garth Nix blindly. I certainly didn't spend much time reflecting on the satisfyingly powerful female characters that he creates. In reading Goldenhand, I was repeatedly struck by the overwhelming presence of women in every field and pursuing every career path in Garth Nix’s world. When a general or a messenger was mentioned, I often found myself pausing over the indication that this character was a woman, having initially assumed it was male character without doing so consciously. In literature and film where strong female characters have begun to appear, we are still used to uneven distribution. We are used to a few extraordinary female fighters and heroines set against a backdrop of secondary characters who are men. The regular, everyday militia is going to populated by men. Garth Nix’s Old Kingdom, on the other hand, has true equality, and in Goldenhand there are more women than men with the novel’s focus on the Clayr where all the roles in society are filled by women. Garth Nix crafts incredibly believable female characters. Part of me wonders whether I'm just expecting too little of other male writers when I’m impressed by Nix. Why can't most male writers create a female character who is, you know, a human being? Sabriel and Lirael often seem like strong leaders regardless of their gender, as if Garth Nix has done what should be the minimum and simply treated his female characters as rational people. 

That being said, I feel Garth Nix does occasionally venture into discussions of gender and portrays his characters as gendered. I think these discussions achieve a lot from a writer who clearly values equality and leadership roles for women. Those moments where Lirael and Nick and Sabriel and Touchstone confront their gender dynamics with their relationships are fascinating to me. Touchstone, for example, pushes back when Sabriel wants to go north of The Great Rift, but this seems motivated by concern for her as an individual, rather than as a women, and is accompanied by recognition of Sabriel’s incredible abilities and how they differ from his own. Sabriel and Touchstone do an excellent job as a couple with role division and distribution. They play to their strengths and while Touchstone is the leader of the people and an organizer of military men and women, Sabriel is a more independent force taking on and challenging the dead. I liked the moment where Sabriel remembered when she was pregnant with her first child and she stayed at the Abhorsen’s house while Touchstone traveled the Old Kingdom, fighting and problem-solving.This book touches on the dynamic that Lirael and Nick begin to define for themselves, which is different than that dynamic Sabriel and Touchstone have chosen. Sabriel reflected on the feeling of being left out of a fight while she was pregnant, and being left out of the action is something Nick frequently faces in this book as the one character who has access to magic, but neither control over it nor training. Will Nick often be left behind and left out when Lirael rushes to the source of trouble? For example, she prepares her owl Charter skin to travel alone to Yellowsands. The novel’s ending is satisfying, however, because Lirael and Nick benefit from their partnership. Nick is able to participate and play a supporting role to Lirael who is clearly our protagonist and hero. 

Further reflection on gender issues in this book is apparent in the way the female characters actively define themselves in romances and relationships. I see this as another forwarding-thinking aspect of this book, as it allows these strong women to express themselves through their gender identities, sexuality, and relationships. And I like that our female characters express a variety of self-identifies when it comes to sexuality, although this message felt a bit forced, plot-wise, when Ferin seduced Sameth, the final scene of the book. This scenes appears pages after Lirael speaks first of hers and Nick’s future marriage. These women are both actively defining the type of relationship that they want. This is a certain type of heroism as important as wielding a sword or a bow. There is no judgment from Garth Nix about the types of relationships or sexualities that are “correct” or “better.” Lirael directly tell Nick that she's never slept with a man before, taking charge over her body and her situation, but her innocence and her commitment to marriage and to Nick, her one true love, is not paired with any judgment of Ferin’s expansive and life-affirming sexuality. It's clear from the final scene with Sameth and Ferin that this is a spontaneous love scene without requests for commitment. I could see how this ending strove to contrast Lirael’s “one true love” approach. Nick and Lirael are clearly the main characters and their love and complex connection is intended to outlast trials and time, and it’s honored and celebrated for this, but it’s not presented as the only option for women. Importantly, this is the right option for Lirael who has always struggled to establish physical and emotional closeness to other people. But what is the right choice for Lirael does not have to be the right choice for Ferin. I like this about Garth Nix’s portrayal of his strong female characters.

At times, this book felt more rushed then the earlier trilogy. I wished this book were as long as Lirael and equally devoted to substantial world-building. Instead, this book seemed more focused on relationships between the characters and basic plot, which--while it does introduce the lands north of the Old Kingdom and Ferin’s world--doesn't do the same indulgent world building that Lirael’s time with the Clayr as a librarian did. I’m a big sucker for world-building in fantasy novels and when I love the world and the characters, I just want more and more of that, probably sometimes at detriment to the plot. I know books wouldn’t be broadly marketable, if they were written with my preferences mind. Still, maybe Garth Nix’s had a new (strict) editor, or maybe the pacing differences are simply due to the time that passed between the writing of the original novels and Goldenhand. Scenes in this book do feel rushed, for example Lirael and Nick’s journey to The Great Rift and the preparations for the battle against the nomad tribes. The majority of the action happens in the last thirty pages of the book. There's a weird acceleration in preparation for the action, which then passes very quickly. The earlier part of the book felt more like the first three novels in terms of pacing. I also feel like earlier parts of the book set up some things that weren't resolved. We did not get a clear understanding of or investigation into the relationship between free magic and Charter magic that exists inside Nick. Even though this power balance between the two forms of magic is later useful, we don't understand it or see its threat that hovers over the early parts of the book. 

I didn’t manage to read Clariel through to the end (shame on me). I was surprised by the antihero approach, as well as struggling to invest in and care about our protagonist. I clearly missed some things that would have helped me with Goldenhand, although it was all comprehensible without having read Clariel. I feel inspired to go back and read Clariel now that I understand the type of ethically complex character that we're heading toward. It was a joy to go back to the Old Kingdom. I cheered for the reappearance of old time friends, particularly the Disreputable Dog and Mogget, as I wasn’t sure whether we’d see these characters. The logistics of magic and the relationship between magic and technology at the border between Ancelstierre and the Old Kingdom has always fascinated me. The various gates of death, the powers of dead beings and free magic sorcerers, the uses of the bells of the Abhorsen: all these things are as intriguing, vivid, and well-imagined as always in Garth Nix’s world.