#making this when i'm bawling my eyes out on a wednesday evening.

[blamemma]

thank you daniel (2011-2024) - no regrets, only memories.

to say goodbye to daniel within f1 still feels wrong. it will never be an easy pill to swallow. it is one dream unfulfilled, but a multitude of many other dreams achieved. i feared i would look back at the memories of daniel and feel that they would forever be tainted moving forward, but to remember all the joy, is to realise every moment was worth it. to look at these pictures, any pictures, of daniel, puts a lump in my throat, but also makes me want to smile from ear to ear. it was a pleasure to tune in every race weekend since the middle of 2021, and feel the nerves and the anxiety and the excitement that were probably only a fraction of what he felt. i'll forever wish he, we, had more. but each and every moment we did get was wonderful. and i cherish each and every one of them, as i'm sure he does. he deserved more. he deserved a proper goodybe. he deserved everything. but it's okay it wasn't that way. everything he had was beautiful. to whatever's next 🥂

[unclewaynemunson]

@bigskyandthecoldgun made this very big-brained post about the perfect miscommunication potential of Eddie's heart monitor betraying his feelings for Steve while he's recovering. @mostrizzaward asked me to write it and how could I say no to that :D

The first time Steve sets foot in Eddie's hospital room is terrifying. Eddie is as pale as a dead man. He has dozens of wires attached to his body, that are connected to just as many machines and monitors displaying complicated graphs, all softly beeping at varying intervals. Everyone in the room talks in soft, grave voices and all the nurses and doctors have matching serious frowns on their faces.

But what seemed to be impossible happens on a dreary Wednesday afternoon in April: Eddie opens his eyes for the very first time since he passed out in Dustin's arms. Steve is at work when that happens, but rushes to the hospital as soon as he can, and suddenly Eddie's room seems a lot less terrifying than before. Because Eddie is grinning at him from his bed, even though he's still pale and weak. He's not only alive, he's awake. It's a goddamn miracle. His wide grin is familiar despite the big scar that has marred his cheek. Fuck, Steve doesn't think he'll ever be able to put into words how much he missed that smile.

Eddie rasps his name as a greeting and Steve comes closer to the bed. But then, something weird happens.

The machines around Eddie's bed are still beeping, but there's less of them now. The electronic symphony of noises has been reduced to a duet of two different beep patterns that are clearly distinguishable from each other. And one of them speeds up rapidly when Steve leans over the bed in an awkwardly angled attempt to give Eddie a hug.

“You okay?” Steve asks, worried. He wonders if he should call for a nurse.

“Yeah, man,” Eddie mumbles. His eyes flash towards the monitor in question for a second and a blush creeps over his white cheeks. He seems ill at ease; Steve can't quite put his finger on it but there's something weirdly awkward about the whole thing. He seems otherwise fine, though, so Steve decides no nurses will be necessary.

He clears his throat and takes a seat in the chair next to the bed. For a moment, he wonders why he's even here. They weren't exactly friends before all of this happened. It would be perfectly normal for Eddie not to want him around – and yet here he is, visiting him in the hospital like it's the most normal thing in the world. What is he even doing here?

But then, Eddie starts talking about how his uncle was with him when he woke up and gave him this book he's been wanting to buy for ages.

“He cried, Steve, I've never seen him cry in my life, but he was bawling, I'm not kidding!��

Despite his animated tone, Eddie's voice is still weak and his eyes keep falling shut even while he is talking. Steve knows that he shouldn't overstay his welcome and let Eddie rest, but he finds himself too captivated in how alive Eddie is, even though his whole presence – his loud voice, his broad arm gestures, his expressive face – seems a little bit toned down. So when Eddie tells him with a vague gesture to his nightstand that he tried to read his new book, but found himself too tired to focus properly, Steve finds himself proposing to read it to Eddie before he even realizes what he's doing.

And then the weird thing happens again. Eddie starts smiling at the exact same time the heart monitor accelerates.

Steve chooses to pretend like he doesn't notice. Instead, he takes the book from the nightstand and flips it open on the first page. He starts reading aloud, but he can't really keep his attention on the words that come out of his own mouth. He can't help but feel like he made a mistake. Is the heart monitor signaling to him that his presence is making Eddie uncomfortable? Shouldn't he have left Eddie alone to rest when he started getting tired? Why the hell did he ever think it'd be a good idea to read to him in the first place? He's never been a good reader, and certainly not a performer like Eddie. So he awkwardly stumbles his way through the words on the pages, in no way able to keep up with the complicated plot and no doubt failing spectacularly in the use of voices and appropriately ominous pauses and whatnot. Whenever he glances up from the pages, he finds Eddie leaning into his pillow with his eyes closed and a faint smile around his lips, only to find out he's lost track of where he was when he directs his attention back to the book in his hands.

It doesn't take long until Eddie's breathing becomes audibly deeper and evens out. Steve softly closes the book. He allows himself a few moments to do nothing but stare at Eddie's face and be grateful for the absence of a breathing tube between his lips, showing that he's only sleeping this time. Then, he gets up and tiptoes out of the room.

***

The weird thing with the heart monitor keeps happening every time Steve visits Eddie. It happens when he greets him, when he starts reading to him, and especially whenever he helps him adjust his position in the bed he's still chained to. Every time they touch, every time Steve gets close to him in any way, like clockwork. And every time, it's paired with some kind of physical reaction on Eddie's part: a blush on his cheeks, a somewhat forced chuckle, or sometimes even a badly concealed flinch, away from where Steve's hands are touching Eddie.

Steve pretends not to notice it, for Eddie's sake, but it can only happen so many times before he has to face the clear and obvious truth here: his presence is making Eddie extremely uncomfortable.

One part of it still doesn't make sense, though: Eddie actually asks him to read to him or to help him sit up or lie down again, and the next thing he knows, Eddie will suddenly be avoiding his gaze and that goddamn heart monitor will make it sound like Eddie is trying to break a sprint record instead of lounging in his bed, and he'll recoil from Steve's touch like he doesn't want his hands anywhere around him.

Steve muses over Eddie's odd behavior for days before he comes to the only logical conclusion: Eddie is actually repulsed by him and is too polite to tell him the truth. It's the only explanation that makes sense. It's just like what Steve realized so clearly that first time after Eddie woke up: they weren't friends before this, so why should they be now? Steve has no business being at his bedside all of a sudden, and Eddie doesn't have the heart to be mean to him and spell that out for him.

He can't even blame Eddie for it. For most of the time they've known each other, Steve was a major asshole, everybody knows that. Sure, they're twenty now and Steve has moved past high school stereotypes when he got close to Robin, but still... Those stereotypes made up everything about who they were, how they were perceived and who they interacted with for four whole years of their lives – six even, in Eddie's case. Eddie doesn't have any reason to want to let that go like Steve did.

He would never admit it to anyone, but the conclusion he reaches breaks Steve's heart: he should stay away from Eddie. Eddie has every right not to like having Steve around and Steve certainly doesn't want to add to his discomfort. He has been through enough, Steve wouldn't want to make this whole long and painful process of recovery even worse for Eddie by imposing his unwanted presence on him.

It doesn't matter that Steve has started to look forward to his hospital visits like they're the very best part of his week. It doesn't matter that Steve's heart starts racing for whole other reasons than Eddie's whenever they're close, whenever they're touching or whenever Eddie is smiling that beautiful smile of his. It doesn't matter that Steve wants nothing more than to keep reading to Eddie even though he still doesn't have a clue what that stupid book is about. None of it matters, because that's simply the price one has to pay for being an asshole and a bully in high school.

It doesn't matter, because there are way worse things than the guy you've developed feelings for secretly harboring a grudge against you. He still has Robin, he still has his little nerds, he even has Nancy back; as a friend, this time, which is honestly better than things ever were between them. He has the knowledge that Eddie survived and will be getting better with each passing day. Maybe he can start dating again, find a cute girl with blue eyes and blonde hair who doesn't remind him of the one person he can't be around, and it'll all be fine again. It doesn't matter.

Update: there's now a sequel post :D

[streamdotpng]

Enid tries to not take scenes too seriously while filming. Her whole thing is being a good actress, someone who can give it their all, not take it heart, make it feel real.

But fuck. It hurt to pretend fight with Wednesday. It hurt to shout at and be shouted at, it hurt to see Wednesday's face tighten and constrict with well-fsked anger.

It hurts.

She tries hard to hide it- very hard, and very well.

She's a good actress. She hides it. She doesn't want Wednesday to think she can't take it. They're so far into filming! A replacement now could push this project back months or even years!

She tries extra hard to push it down at home. Don't bring work home, happy wife, happy life, all that good stuff.

But one day it just hits.

It was so small. Enid wasn't watching where she was going and hit a doorframe and Wednesday was there and called her an idiot with that fond tone but Wednesday also called her an idiot during a shoot earlier and it felt real and-

She bawls. Wails. Breaks down in the entrance of their shared kitchen.

Wednesday's got a hand in her hair, another rubbing her ribs and it helps but also doesn't but it does-

Enid cries for a good while. The sun was nearing it's drip over the skyline, and by the time she's done, the sky's gone black.

It's nearing winter. Maybe she isn't as pathetic as she thinks she is.

"Dear," Wednesday starts, soft voiced in a way only Enid is privy to. "Are you alright? Do you wish to talk?"

"You yelled at me." It's all she can muster, meager and weak and pathetic.

She's pathetic.

"When, Cara Mia? I never mean to raise my voice."

"Durin' the fuckin'- the- the shoot. Part of the shoot. It was part of the shoot, part of the shoot, part of the shoot, part of the shoot, part of t-"

"Enid." Wednesday's voice has a finality to it. A sturdiness. "I understand you are distressed. But breathe, sweetheart."

Enid hadn't even realized she'd stopped breathing or that her claws were out or she'd been scratching her arms bloody.

"Right, right, right yup, you're ri- correct. I need to breath."

"You need to breath." Wednesday parrots.

They sit sit for a bit. A few moments. Minutes, maybe. Wednesday's thumb rubs circles into her forearm, the other hand placed lovingly on her cheek, cupping it warmly.

Loving.

"I know you didn't mean it," Enid starts, careful and slow and shaky and hurt, "but you yelled during the scene earlier -and it's part of the fucking script- but you sounded so mad-" tears in her fucking eyes like she's a fucking child.

"My wolf," Wednesday wipes the tears before they fall and it's such a tender action it makes Enid cry just a little harder. "I.."

She kisses Enid's forehead quietly, brushes her bangs back.

"I'm sorry. I meant nothing of the anger I gave you. It was fake."

"I know!-" Enid sobs, and her body rattles with it, "but it -fuck- it felt real!"

She takes a big breath to calm herself. Swallows air and spit and hurt.

"I know you never meant it- always give me kisses to make up for it, but you sound so convincing and it hurts so bad. I didn’t want to say anything because I didn't wanna hurt you or make you feel bad or like you had to delay or end the movie just because of me!"

She pants.

"It makes me feel like shit because both our characters have good points and it feels like we're having a real fight. It makes this part of me feel like our relationship is on the rocks and about to end and i want to break down and cry because of it."

Wednesday holds her.

It helps.

It's real.

"We're taking a break." No room for argument in her voice. Enid swallows. It's just spit she swallows now.

"A couple of weeks, maybe 3 or 4 if you need- and you will not lie."

"Okay. Okay." It's the first time in a few weeks she feels like she can breath unrestricted.

"Okay."

(Apologies if this isn't lore correct all the way through- I'm still new to your blog and AUs and what-not.)

man anon, you got me teary and shit. This is amazing! its totally alright for stuff to not be lore correct, i'll prob just offhandedly mention it but this is definitely how i'd do it too

i love it so much, just the way enid tends to shoulder things and just how willing Wednesday is to help her through it

its amazing man 😥you write them so well

[hunsa-jars]

Howdy

Good morning, or evening, or middle of the night to whoever happens to be reading this, hi

I'm just here to rant I guess, as there's nothing else to do, waiting for a train right now

I always feel guilty when I suddenly disappear out of blue and leave my friends in the dark so this is kind of an explanation

But saying that just... I'm sorry

This is mostly for myself

For grounding purposes

Last week was pretty rough and I'm still processing it, because even as I'm writing this, it still feels unreal

Well it was a lot worse last week but sure you get what I mean

My grandpa passed away last Wednesday morning

I was on a bus, on my way to the town's kindergarten to have my first practice classes when my mom called, and uh... you can probably imagine that for the next few days everything got stuck in this void limbo of "He can't be gone" and "Is this actually happening" and "What happens now"

I didn't want to bawl my eyes out in front of strangers but I couldn't think about going back either after the arrangements me, my group mates and the kindergarten teacher had to make, so I kind of forced myself into entering a tunnel vision mindset and just..... tried not to think about it at all. At least not while I was with the children

Honestly I'm a bit proud of myself for that, that I held out for so long, didn't have a meltdown in there during those 3 days

Well today I did crack up but it couldn't be helped. I managed to take care of everyone on my own for a whole hour, they liked my games, the teachers told me I did great, and I guess the relief mixed with them telling me again that they're sorry about what happened pretty much kicked me out of the Calm Zone

(They were very understanding and left me alone till I felt better, so it's okay, I'm okay now)

So that's all over.

But god, it was hard, back home. Him and my grandma were our next door neighbours for as long as I could remember. We ran into each other almost every day. And yet I feel like I didn't know him that well. I didn't know him enough, as he was also a person of few words, but I miss him, I'm gonna miss him so much. I wish I could just go back and ask him about his past, what he was up to as kid, what kind of dates he took grandma on or anything, instead of just walking by him in silence. I wish I could have been there before the ambulance took him away. I wish I could have told him I loved him before he was gone. He'd been feeling off for the past few months but it all got worse so suddenly.

My sister keeps my grandma company, because there's no way we gonna let her be all alone. The house is so quiet now

The funeral is held tomorrow, I don't know how she, my mom or my aunt will handle it

Hell, I have no idea how I will handle it

Things will get better, I hope, after we said our goodbyes properly

Not easier, but maybe a bit better

If you're still here, thanks for listening, I don't know where I was going with this but I feel a smidge calmer now

See you soon

[shadowlineswriting]

Backman

Frederick Backman wrote A Man Called Ove, which was somewhat recently turned into a film called "A Man Called Otto" (I don't know why they changed the name). It was pretty popular, but I didn't see it. I mention it because I heard about it a lot when it came out, and as such Frederick Backman was on my radar, so to speak.

I heard of his novel My Grandmother Asked Me to Tell You She's Sorry. It's about a seven-year-old who is very close to her grandmother, and when her grandmother dies, she leaves instructions for her granddaughter to deliver letters to people they know. They're letters of apology, though the granddaughter can't imagine what her grandmother needs to apologize for.

I thought it sounded very sweet, so even though I don't lean toward realistic fiction (though so far in this book challenge that's been the dominant genre), I picked it up from the library.

To tell you the truth, I should've adored this book for a number of reasons. First, I am/was very close to both of my grandmothers. I called my paternal grandmother every single Wednesday until she moved into a retirement community and became too social for me (haha!). I still call my maternal grandmother every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. Secondly, part of what makes the relationship in this book so special is that the grandmother makes up a fantasy world for the granddaughter. It's how the granddaughter copes with reality. My older sister and I did this growing up, and to this day, we still reference the world we built. Someday, I'm going to write a book about them.

Anyway, because of these things, I found this book so relatable. However, Backman's writing style was a little tough for me. It's very slow burn, which is fine, but I struggled to get through it. It took me over a week to read this book and it's only 370 pages. If you've been following this blog for any length of time, you know that's an eternity in my world. Some of the descriptions were a little hard to follow (which could have been a translation thing, not a writing thing, I don't know) and I had to force myself to pick it up and read, even though I did genuinely want to know how the book was going to turn out.

By the time I made it to the end, I was so glad I did. In fact, I bawled my eyes out...and books almost never make me cry! They were happy tears, but still. It was quite the experience.

I could see myself reading this again someday. I could see myself buying this someday, though not right now. Right now I just want to mull it over and appreciate the story for what it was: a beautiful tale of grandmothers and granddaughters and mothers, too, and the impact they all have on one another's lives.

Highly recommend!

[youarestellarverse]

WIP Wednesday - Grover&Percy 4/20 fic

Ack, I forgot it was Wednesday! Whoops.

I present bonding over pot brownies.

"I remember you telling me once that you thought of yourself as my protector."

"I never really stopped." Grover, his smile turning confessional, drapes his arm over the back of the couch. "I just try not to nag you so much, especially now that you have a boyfriend who'll do it for me."

Percy grabs onto Grover's hand like they're little kids. 

"It baffled me back then, but I get it now," he says, strangled. Maybe he'd be embarrassed, if he weren't so stoned. "I need you, dude. I can't talk to anyone the way I can talk to you— not even Jason. I'd be a total mess if I didn't have you in my life." 

"I'm glad he's there for you when I can't be." Grover might be choking up a little too, or maybe the effects of the pot just make Percy perceive his eyes as especially reflective. "I need you, too. No matter what, I'm proud to call you my best friend. You could decide to drop out of school and become a garbage collector¹, and I'd still respect and admire you. You're my brother, man. I love you, and nothing's going to change that." 

It's as though Grover's presence is a weighted blanket, heavy and warm. His smile is a sunbeam piercing cloud cover, and his voice is the color of wild, ripe strawberries, so dark red they're nearly maroon. Sweet, familiar, vibrant. 

"I could drop out," Percy repeats. "It's still before the cutoff date, so I'd get all my money back." 

Grover, seeming to understand that he's hit on something, nods encouragingly. 

"Iris has been hinting about promoting you to shift manager at the cafe anyway, hasn't she? You could take on some more hours, save up a little money—" 

"—and move in with Jason sooner." 

"Which would make him very happy," Grover adds. "And also make Thalia happy, because then you don't have to use her apartment for all of your trysts."

Percy feels his face fall. Grover raises a curious, worried eyebrow.

"Thinking of Thalia reminds me of my mom," Percy explains miserably, sliding down the couch and resting his head in Grover's lap. "I don't want to let her down. She worked so hard to make sure I'd succeed."

"That just means you have to change your definition of success." Grover puts a comforting hand on Percy's head. "Right now, success is taking some time off from school because it's making you miserable, and focusing on your job and your family instead because those things make you happy."

Percy can almost hear it in his mom's voice. He closes his eyes and lets Grover braid his hair— which is hilarious, when he realizes his joke to her became prophetic. 

"You're the smartest person I know." 

"Counting your Ivy League boyfriend?" 

"He's told me about a million times he only got in because his dad is an alum." Percy cracks open one eye. "Which is probably true, although I do think he could have gotten in on merit. The point is, he's a close runner up, but that's not the kind of smart I'm talking about anyway. He's brain-smart. You're heart-smart."

For a second time, Percy blames the brownie for his emotional outburst, but he likes laughing uncontrollably over his own (probably not actually) brilliant pun a lot better than bawling over a broken guitar string. 

Grover collapses with him, which is the cherry on top of the brownie sundae. 

Eventually, they open Grover's laptop and find a stream of the Lions versus Crimson. Jason's in, and he's on fire— he leads Columbia to a landslide victory, which makes Percy's soul glow with pride. 

Grover dozes off shortly after the game wraps. Percy can feel the weed encouraging him to do the same, but there's something he has to do first. 

He's not sure if the text he sends Jason's burner makes any sense, but he's pretty sure he manages the general idea. His phone is still in his hand when he falls under.

¹ This is a reference to a classic by antistar_e called Ten Things Percy Loves About Having Sex, which I highly recommend and consider a formative influence on my writing style!

Presently just under 5600 words.

@elaborateruses @perseusjackson-jasongrace 😘

[living-d3ad-gh0ul]

Wednesday 30th November 2022, 11.10pm

Its taken me a few days to write this post. I've been trying to make sure it's just right. I've also been busy with work, but I've thought about him the whole time. The first time I read his last post was actually when I was on my way to see Pale Waves, the same day he posted it. I've started writing a new song since too. I only have words right now, but it's shaping up okay.

I'm not sure how to reach out either. I don't want to do anything that would spook you or that you wouldn't like or be comfortable with. I like these posts too and I read yours all the time too, it really does feel like having a conversation. I still remember how you go "Awww" at something really cute and your laugh. I still remember how you say my name. God, I love how you say my name. I've replayed your voice in my head so many times, you wouldn't believe. I bawled my eyes out when you said you'd heard my Wicked Game cover. I didn't know you still looked at those. I'm so glad you do. I still listen to your things you sent me too..

I remember how I was so frustrated that night on the train and didn't know what was going on, but you stayed talking to me and kept me calm and made me smile. I wish you could have been there too, but even being far away, you did so good. I also remember staying awake as late or as early as I could, just to talk to you. I can't believe you remember my favourite colour, my birthday and all these little details about me. I'm sitting here laughing and crying as I type this because I'm just so in awe of you. I can't believe you're real sometimes. You. Amazing and brilliant and smart and fantastic and beautiful you.

You described some different things about yourself. And all I could think the whole time was "I bet you are still as handsome". I wear glasses now too. And I have more tattoos. My hair isn't red anymore, it hasn't been for about a year now. I let it go back to my natural blonde for a while and cut it short because it was damaged from dyeing it so much. It's getting longer again and once it's healthier, I probably will go back to red. You know how much I love my red hair. I hope you would still like it blonde, still like me how I am now. I really wish I could show you a picture and show you all my tattoos too.

I'm sorry that the people around you aren't being supportive of what you want to do with your life. It hurts to hear that. I wish I could be there for you and support you and help motivate you and encourage you to do whatever makes you happy. I suppose I can do that from here too, but I just wish I could be close to you right now, so you didn't feel so alone. I could tell you so many things I've wanted to, do so many things I've wanted to and thought about, dreamed about over the years. I *am* so proud of you. More than I can properly articulate. Change is so hard, but sometimes change can be good for us. Please keep going, E. I know you can do it, you can do anything. You can do absolutely anything because you're you. And you're capable of it all. The world is yours. Go and get it, darling.

I'm sitting here listening to this song as I write the last of this post. It randomly came on shuffle, and its so fitting that I'm sat here, writing to you, and one of our favourite bands comes on. It's rainy and really fuckin cold here right now too and I'm just about to go get ready for bed. I hope this post wasn't too long, I'm sorry if it was. I hope you're smiling right now, like I am. Your posts do give me comfort.. so much.. more than you know.

I'm going to post a video of when I went to see Pale Waves on Sunday too, soon after this..

Looking so long at these pictures of you, but I never hold on to your heart.. Looking so long for the words to be true, but always just breaking apart..

[torilovestowrite]

Dabi x Reader; Try Again pt. 8

Synopsis: Years ago, (Y/n) was left by her villain boyfriend, Dabi after discovering an unexpected news. Ever since then, she never had a lover— focusing on her only son, Yuta. Later on, she meets Todoroki Touya— a new co-worker who seem to be persistent towards winning her heart and attention.

Ship: Dabi x Fem! Reader

❗❗❗Content Warning: Mentions of Abortion, Unplanned Pregnancy, Manga spoilers, Dabi is a Todoroki theory

🖤 » Chapter Navigation « 🖤

"Yuta L/n, you're not going out!" Y/n strictly reprimanded as she tried to keep her son still from his position, lying on bed with a cold towel on his forehead.

It was during a Wednesday when Yuta, y/n's son, had a fever that reached over 41 degrees. Y/n felt threatened about this because her son has never reached this temperature. It's too high— and he also stated something about his body feeling heavy. What could be happening?

"B-but... we're about to watch a movie in school today! I don't want to miss it!" Yuta began bawling his eyes out while Y/n sighed at his dramatic tone. Does it really have to be like this? Yuta has to be emotional and sensitive every time he gets sick? This only reminds her of him— the way he would caress her soft hands every time she would tend his wounds every after a tiring day— the man he used to love, Dabi, would appear to be more gentle and affectionate every time he gets worn out... or ill.

"We're going to watch a movie while you take a rest here at home, okay?" Y/n gently tapped her son's side in an attempt to make him close his eyes and sleep. "For now, take a rest. Or else, it would take longer before you could go outside."

Immediately, Yuta turned his back from his mother in an attempt to be more comfortable; and to have a good sleep. Y/n smiled at his actions. Good thing, her son has always been considerate on her hardwork and the way she disciplines him.

It wasn't too long until she heard a notification from her phone— a message coming from Touya.

touya ❣ : good morning y/n. how's ur pretty face doing?

It's been four months since y/n realized her feelings for Touya. Both of them started dating two months ago and so far, he has been understanding towards her obligations as a mother. Most of their dates included Yuta and there are times when Touya would volunteer to watch over him while she's away during her day shifts. Y/n could never ask for anything— Touya was doing his job greatly; as a boyfriend and as a paternal figure to Yuta.

you : yeah, i'm all good babe. thanks for asking. but yuta's sick rn... i dont really have anyone to take care of him and i need to go for my day shift.

touya ❣ : you want me to go for it? i mean, i only work during nights anyways

Y/n's smile lit up as she read his message. Finally! She thought. She could go to work!

you: sure thing babe 💗✨

Few more minutes, when Yuta has finally travelled to dreamland, Y/n left the house, wearing her thick f/c coat with her hair styled to become more neat-looking. Another day for work, she thought.

It's been two hours since Touya arrived in Y/n's home. Using the spare key under her house's doormat, he decided to enter her house that was silent when he went inside. Until he heard a child's high-pitched scream coming from Yuta's bedroom. His instinct caused him to immediately run towards this direction; but what he saw caused a heavy sensation in his chest. Those familiar blue flames that was once his signature— as Dabi; the heartless villain who claimed 30 innocent lives.

"U-Uncle T-Touya!" Yuta cried in panic while his right hand was burning with blue and heated fire. "W-What should I do?! M-my—"

"Breathe." Touya immediately replied as he kneeled next to him, rubbing his back with his huge and rough hands. "You have to control your breathing and your emotions. You have to control it because the more you panic, the more it will get stronger."

Yuta closed his eyes and focused in calming himself down— taking deep breaths and thinking about things that he liked in life— ice cream, Y/n, Uncle Touya, pro-heroes... all the things that makes him happy. Slowly, the fire became smaller and smaller— until nothing appeared on his hands.

"I-It's gone! The blue flames!" Yuta exclaimed as a grin crept on his face. "Did you see that awesome thing on my hand, Uncle Touya?! That must be my quirk, right?"

"Yes, it's an awesome quirk that you have." Touya smiled sadly as he stared at the young and naive child— as if he was seeing his past self; the pure child who was corrupted by his father's evil desires and deeds. It was all fun and games knowing he has an awesome quirk like that... until his father, Enji Todoroki, decided to ruin everything for him.

But he swore to be someone better than him; to be a man suitable to be called a father.

That afternoon, Y/n arrived at her home with such beautiful sight; Touya and Yuta scooped in each others' arms while the movie was left streaming. She smiled at the sight. It was so cute. For a few seconds, she almost believed that Touya was Yuta's father. The young mother couldn't help it but to take a picture of the two while having their peaceful slumber.

"I saw you," Touya spoke, "Delete it."

Y/n giggled as Touya stood up from his position as he tried to grab the phone away from her hands. It was such a cute sight. She was sticking her tongue out while she was trying to chase him. Y/n couldn't help but to feel as if they were all.. what? 17? Whatever, it felt cute, though.

"Yeah, whatever. Have that pic all you want. You can even make it your wallpaper." Y/n got her cheeks pinched by him as he gave her a light kiss on the nose. "I'm going now, sweet cheeks, I'm attending night shift for tonight."

"Sure, sure." Y/n smiled, planting a kiss on his cheek, as she watched his lean and toned figure leave their house. All that's left is her and Yuta. Slowly, his eyes opened to see his mother watching him sleep.

"Mommy?" Yuta spoke in a drowsy tone.

Y/n responded, hugging her son beside her while his eyes still looked sleepy. Seems that the sleep wasn't enough for him, huh? The young lady laughed at this, ruffling his hair, and deciding to ask him. "How was your day with Uncle Touya? Is it better than it was when you're at school?"

The young lad aggressively nodded and decided to tell Y/n the greatest thing that he discovered today.

"My quirk just manifested, ma! I have blue flames!" Yuta exclaimed as he tried to show it off with the tip of his fingers. Y/n's eyes widened at this— it created a tingling feeling in her heart. It was like a slap on her face. Yuta is really Dabi's son, isn't he?

"T-That's awesome." Y/n replied, trying to stop tears from flowing.

While her son was still busy talking about his day, her hands were able to feel something on the couch. It was... hard. She pulled out to see a black leather wallet. Did Touya forget his stuff here? Y/n sighed at his forgetfulness. Well, he's a person, she thought, so he has flaws too.

"Did Uncle Touya forget that, ma?" Yuta asked in a polite tone. "Bring it back to him tomorrow, okay?"

Y/n smiled at what he said. She really raised her son well. "Sure!"

It was night time. Yuta went back to sleep and Y/n was busy contemplating inside her room— walking back and forth; thinking about whether she should check his stuff or what.

It's not what others would think. It's just that it's been two months since they got together but Touya only says few things about himself. All she knew is that his parents are living overseas and he's left alone here. He has siblings who lived with their parents in abroad. Nothing more, nothing less.

Aside from that, it wouldn't hurt to peek just a little bit, right?

Y/n sighed as she finally came to a conclusion to check his wallet to see if there's something that would tell more about himself. It's not like she was nosy. She just wants to get to know him at a better level. He's quite of a silent and mysterious guy himself, which got the young lady curious about him.

Of course, there was nothing new; just few IDs, bunch of credit cards (which Y/n thought was odd because if he had this much money, why would he work in an old bar as a bartender), and a thin wad of cash. Nothing else— until something that was so unordinary in her eyes— fell.

Her eyes widened as she saw that memoribilia. No words could come out from her mouth. Her vision felt so dark; as if it was slowly fading; and her heart hurt so much. Only tears could come out from her eyes. No scream, no words, no phrases— simply, nothing.

"Y-you..." Her fists clenched tightly as her form started shaking— she didn't know what to feel. Is it anger, sadness, remorse— what should she feel first? She began to wail as she stared and touched at this object from the past. Whatever that happened was too painful for her to bear.

"You fooled me... Dabi."

That night, Touya was looking for his wallet. It was nowhere to be found; not even in his car. Maybe he left it at your place? Well, whatever the circumstances are, he was hoping that none of you would be able to find it. Maybe, he'd drive towards your place again and—

His thoughts were interrupted as his phone rang. The caller ID showed Y/n— and a selfie that she sent him as the profile picture. Immediately, he answered it.

"Hello, bab—"

"Don't you babe me. We have to talk." Y/n's voice sounded cold and harsh. She was angry... and he knew it. Touya knew that tone several years ago; and if he hears that, he knows that hell will break because of her wrath.

"What is it?"

"Stop acting dumb." Y/n scoffed.

"How the hell are you alive, Dabi?"

Taglist [OPEN]: @babayaga67 @marydragneell @xxtrash-kingxx @paranoiac-666 @velvet-kissesss @orenjineki @mermaid-starlet @ikita454 @yo-girl-lunar @pansexual-booknerd @daimiyu

a/n: i kinda did stop updating this but like bnha chapter 290 got me like 😭😭😭😭 dabi can i give u a hug plspslslslsl 😗😗

[lihikainanea]

Blame my love of old animal Disney movies and Friends, imagine if Bill had never seen Old Yeller. He thinks its a good lovable family movie about a dog and makes Tiger watch it one Saturday afternoon. He is confused when Tiger says its really sad and then he is really confused and concerned when Tiger starts bawling right before "it" happens. (I may still cry my little black heart out when I watch this movie. Give me any romcom and I'm fine but you kill off the dog...or Mufasa and I'm a mess.)

Baby, you’re gonna hit me with this when it is International Dog Day?

You are going to hit me with this when my love for doggos knows NO BOUNDS? ARE YOU KIDDING ME?

Do you know why I went to karate tonight, babes? Listen, before I tell you--let me give you some context. I am exhausted. I am exhausted. I have not slept since like, last Thursday. I am full of anxiety. My iron deficiency is in full destruction mode, so I’m like...medically tired. I am sore. I am grumpy. We train outside, and it was cold today and I knew there would be a million bugs.

But I went to karate because on Wednesdays my Shihan brings his dog and I am allowed to pet him before class starts and his dog loves me and I LOVE HIS DOG and literally that is the only reason why I went.

Maybe tiger is like, fucking sadistic (who would doubt it at this point? Not me) and when she’s soff and hormonal and emotional, she likes to watch sad movies. And you’re bang on, maybe Bill has no idea but god she’s just been such a good ball of cuddly mush that day for him, he knows she’s uncomfortable and sensitive and in pain so when she pads into the kitchen as he’s making tea--hair all amuck, her hot water bottle hugged to her, his huge sweatshirt on--and quietly asks if he can come snuggle on the couch because she wants to be held, Bill all but throws the kettle and runs to her so fast he nearly skids by her.

So they get settled on the couch, she’s half on his chest, his arm around her, and you know she’s doing that thing that she’s fond of lately--he leaves his other hand resting on his chest and surely enough within a few minutes, tiger is sucking lightly at the tips of a few of his fingers.

But here’s the thing--tiger’s waterworks start real early in the movie. Probably as early as like...the bear cub. Because she knows. She knows that Old Yeller is such a good boy. Bill tuts her softly, pushes his fingers a bit more into her mouth, scritches at her hair. He hugs her closer, making sure the blanket is around her.

But then...then his shirt is like, getting soaked with her tears by the time the hog incident happens. And Bill maybe knows what will happen at the end--it’s a dog movie, you know, and they all end in the same way basically--and maybe he doesn’t realize how tense he is(and, the bonehead--he knows how it ends but he DOESN’T KNOW HOW IT’LL END). The lump in his own throat is forming.

But then, then the rabid cow. Bill is on edge, tiger can feel his heart beating a little faster--and when the wolf finally comes, Bill sucks in a breath.

“No,” he mumbles, and he clutches tiger to him--he even lifts her a bit so she’s higher on his chest, and he turns her face to his.

“What is this movie?” he asks, and his eyes are big and wide, “It’s not what I think, right? Tiger, right?”

“Just watch,” she mumbles softly.

But look, the wolf bites, and the next time tiger looks at Bill--he’s crying. Not weeping, not even audible, just a few tears trickling down his cheeks.

“No,” he mumbles softly, “No no no, Old Yeller you gotta be okay bud...”

She hugs him close, and he hugs her even closer.

And oh man, when Katie comes with the rifle? Bill is a mess.

“Don’t you dare,” he whispers, “Katie, don’t you--Travis no. You can’t. Tiger he’s can’t, can he? He’s not going to--”

And then a sob of total betrayal. Bill is gutted.

By the end, these two are legit just clinging to each other, tiger sobbing and Bill swiping at his wet cheeks.

“What the fuck kid,” he asks with a strained voice, “Why would you do this?!”

[memesiders]

WARNING: BUTT STUFF AHEAD

So, I let the kittens out of their carrier one morning, and Fury's ass was hanging out. Like, her colon or whatever was hanging about an inch/inch and a half out of her butt. So I'm freaking the hell out, my mom calls our vet (because I get huge anxiety when talking to people I don't know very well on the phone. Like, my tongue feels like it's swelling and it's hard to breathe normal and it feels like there's something in my throat), of course they were closed, so I had to wait the next day (Fury was still eating/drinking/running around playing). Call the vet, they say "eh, it should be fine if she's acting normal." So I have to wait until yesterday (Friday) to take her to the vet (this happened like four or five days ago). We take her to the vet, walk in, and the receptionist says "yeah sorry the veterinarian is in emergency surgery & we can't see her today."

My mom shows the secretary Fury's behind and the secretary's like "oh that's bad! That's really bad. We can't fix this. That's definitely gonna need surgery! I didn't think it was that far out." I want to scream at this bitch because we literally said "it's sticking out about an inch or an inch and a half" like do you not know how long an inch is?! You don't have a ruler or common fucking sense?!

I didn't say that of course, but my mom was like "yeah I'm pretty sure she could die from this." And the secretary's like "well..... I can get you in on Wednesday." LIKE WHAT?!?! MY KITTEN COULD DIE AND YOU CAN'T EVEN KEEP HER TO HAVE THE VET AT LEAST LOOK AND GIVE US A QUOTE OF HOW MUCH OR HAVE HIM TRY TO PUT IT BACK IN?! My mom also asked her "is it okay to give her a bath?" and the woman was like "yeah it'll be fine!"

So my mom, who is pissed by now, schedules an appointment and we leave and go to a different town to pick up my Shadow of the Tomb Raider game. My mom calls her friends vet because they're supposed to be great and my mom's like "is there any way you can just look at her? We're terrified something's going to happen to her," and they're like "sorry no we only do it if you have the money up front." Meanwhile I'm bawling my eyes out thinking that we're gonna have to put Fury down and there's no way in hell I was gonna give up on her. So we go to GameStop and my mom goes in and I face my fear of calling/talking to strangers and I call one of the local veterinary clinics. The receptionist answers and I'm literally on the verge of tears going "I have a kitten with I think a prolapsed rectum (do not look that up if you're squeamish!!!!) and we don't get money until the 3rd is there any way you can do anything?!" And this poor woman is just like "yeah, the veterinarian doesn't get in till 6 but when she gets in I'll ask if there's anything you can do for her at home."

So my mom, Fury, and I wait until 6 in the Safeway parking lot and the vet calls before 6. I shove the phone to my mom because y'know, I already went out of my comfort zone once today. The vet tells us to soak the colon in a warm sugar/water mixture or something like that and my mom's like "uh... Can we just pop on over and you can give me the directions?" Because the whole thing was explained very complicatedly. The vet's like "yeah sure!" So we go on over there and my mom goes in and she's in there for a bit. The next thing I know she's at the car like "the vet wants to take a look at her."

So I'm breathing my first sigh of relief in like 2 or 3 hours. Also, she talked to the vet about bathing her, the vet said "absolutely not! That will infect it. The only way you should put water on that is with the warm sugar/water mix." So now I'm like "that fucking secretary told us it was okay. What if I hadn't called and we went home and bathed her. How horrible would it have gotten?! WTF?!" So yeah, I'm livid with that vet.

Anyways, we go in, the vet checks her, and she's like "I... Don't know if I'll be able to get it back in. It's pretty far out. I'll try but if I can't you'll have to take her to an emergency hospital to someone who specializes in rectal surgery." So she takes Fury in the back and my mom and I are praying that she can get it back in because the only way we could pay up front for a surgery is if we do a Go Fund Me or something. We can hear poor Fury meowing in the back and I have to fight the urge to go back there and comfort her lol. Next thing you know, the vet walks in and is like "yeeeeeah, she's not gonna let us touch anything while she's conscious so we're gonna have to put her under anaesthesia."

And tbh I had a feeling they'd have to do that because Fury owns her name; if she doesn't like something she will squirm, growl, and bite for it to stop. So they put her under and we wait in the waiting room, still praying she can fix it. It takes a bit but the vet comes out and is like "success!" I breathe another sigh of relief and we wait until she wakes up and gets medicine and a cone of shame to get her back. In the meantime, my mom and them set up a payment plan (at first it was a six month payment plan but we got to a three month payment plan. For everything- the examination, anaesthesia, medicine, fixing Fury's butt, and the sutures- came down to $161 which is mind blowing tbh.

Fury is finally brought out and I hold back laughter because the smallest cone they have is still too big for her, so much so that they had to use nylon and tie it around her to secure it properly and she gets her feet stuck in it. So we leave and the poor thing sleeps in my arms the entire way home. When we get in we put her in a different crate and she hates it. She somehow manages to get the cone off so we put it back on. She gets it back off again and we put it back on and tie it a different way and now it's fine. She starts crying as we put her siblings into their crate and I feel horrible because she loves cuddling with her siblings. They all sleep cuddled together and the poor thing can't have that comfort for a few days.

We have to watch her eating & drinking and make sure her bowel movements are good and that she's not straining, and if everything is good then she should be getting her stitches out in five days and her siblings are going in with her for a welfare check because we don't want to risk anything like this happening again. We still don't know how or why it happened exactly; apparently it can happen for different reasons. The vet was shocked to know Fury was still eating, drinking, and running around, but she's a tough cookie. I'm just thankful she's okay. (Update: She's probably gonna have to go get her stitches redone actually because she's having a hard time having bowel movements.)

Anyways, that's the story of how I found a new vet and got Fury's butt fixed. Here's some photos of before and after she got her butt fixed up