#making a series of webweaves for my affections

[blubellsys]

cloudy skies in a patch of forget-me-nots. hey, you! i love you

we don't believe what's on tv, twenty one pilots / friedrich nietzsche / ominious-ellipses / moderndaymystic / virginia woolf / reddit / andrea gibson / heroes wikia, musa / critter-casey / arunima / mitskicoded / @inknighted // for @spectresummons

[sehtoast]

What inspired your oc?

what inspired Ben?

that’s a hell of a rabbit hole, but lemme give it a crack. hope you're ready to read a whole book lol :

so, for starters, i’ve always been a spider-man kid for as long as I can remember.  I’m not sure what my first introduction to spidey would’ve been, but i’d bet it was either the 90s animated series or tobey maguire’s spider-man movies.  The first maguire movie came out when i was 2, but i’m positive i saw it super young because i don’t remember a time where i didn’t absolutely fucking adore spidey. Some of my strongest memories are actually of ‘wall crawling’ up my grandma’s brick sidewalk and running around her yard like i was swinging from a web.  I had the toys, the pajama suit, the string-can webshooters, plastic masks, played all the games growing up, etc etc. Spider-man stuff is just like, idk INGRAINED in me. He’s what i wanted to be- and, honestly, i still dream of swinging from a web.

Now, that said: Ben.

Ben started as a x reader concept. I’d never written fics before stumbling onto homelander, but i ended up finally snapping one day and giving it a shot for two reasons.  a) blindmagdalena inspired me to write and b) i wanted to finally see some form of trans rep for fanfics, particularly for transmasculine people.  I have my brain trained so strictly to swap pronouns, gendered terms, and even body part names that it actually affects my reading outside of fics, too. Which isn’t necessarily good, but it just goes to show how little is out there for us (fic is usually always skewed toward fem readers- which isn’t a bad thing! It just makes it hard for transmasc folks to indulge sometimes).  But yeah, i really fucking wanted to finally put something out there for us.

But, this fella had to have powers right?  Tender Threads was the start of my writing adventures and i was adamant that it would follow a supe!reader.  And what powers would i want if i were a supe? Spider powers, of course!  Initially i was really insecure about doing this because webweaver already exists in the boys comics and i felt like a copycat.  I couldn’t even figure out a better spidery hero name than spider-man, so i said fuck it and went with it.  Of course, months later across the spider-verse came out and validated me putting a spider-man in another universe, but that’s besides the point lol.

The more i wrote this x transmasc!reader concept, the more and more i could see Ben in my head.  He started off as a concept and just… grew?  I picked his name because i really like ben reilly as spidey and i figure there’s gotta be another spider-man out there named benjamin, right? They can’t all be variants of peter and the more major characters. Funny enough, he was almost a Bennett.  Anyway, i imagined him quite similar to peter parker in the ultimate spider-man comic line, but he’s steadily grown to have his own appearance, especially once i went out looking for a face claim for him and found froy gutierrez.  Now, he looks like a ~2018 era froy!  Funny how ocs grow and change.

I decided that i wanted him to have powers more along the lines of Miles Morales in the insomniac games (bc i fucking ADORE miles and i think his bioelectricity is SO FUCKING COOL). So, i picked that. Kept the organic webbing bc that made sense to me. 

Also, it  wasn’t even a thought in my head of whether or not to carry over the aspect of being trans for ben.

His suit design was heavily inspired by the unbreakable spider-man suit by @ vaughanilla_cosplays on instagram, but i’m still working on building a design that is truly ben’s.

From there, i thought of him in terms of what my ideal spider-man would be like. This part i actually struggled with until i stumbled across this video of Peter Cullen about the day he auditioned for optimus prime (hopefully the time start works, otherwise it's at 1:38-2:10).  Those words hit me first, like, as a person, and i find them influencing me in my day to day life, surprisingly.  But then i realized, that’s what i want for ben.  If ben was going to be a hero, he was going to be a real hero.  Benjamin would be strong enough to be gentle.  Even being a character destined to love a man who is anything but, Ben would be strong enough to be gentle.

Above everything else, Benjamin is gentle.

And from there, he grew.  He grew and grew and grew, and now he’s actually very precious to me.  Ben is my spider-man, more than any iteration ever. When i think of spidey, i think of Ben.

But yeah. I guess ben was ultimately inspired by my love for spider-man meeting my love for the boys. Just, one day an egg appeared, you know?

Anyway, thank you so much for this ask. I fucking LOVE talking about my lil benny-boo