#makima can't smoke

[dumbshyanon]

Guys, I-I... I don't understand why I keep seeing fanart of Makima smoking... because she can't fucking smoke- 💀

Bro started coughing after one puff

[f1gments]

DETOUR - HAYAKAWA AKI |早川アキ (M)

You and Aki are supposed to be on your way back from a mission, but the rain that’s been pouring non-stop has Aki pulling over to the side of an empty road for safety precautions. It doesn’t look like it’s stopping any sooner, so what better way to spend that time than to have sweaty, breathy, messy sex in the back seat?

MINORS DNI

Pairing: aki x fem!bodied reader

word count: 8.0k

R18, making out, smut, car sex, protected sex, semi-public sex, handjob, oral sex (towards Aki), vaginal fingering, nipple licking, cowgirl position, missionary, vaginal sex, teasing & dirty talk, softdom aki (?), boyfriend aki

he smokes for a little bit. also calls you baby a few times.

authors note: car sex fic among my list of wips that i’ve been wanting to put out for ages, so ya’ll can thank the amount of horny i had in order to push through with this fic lol. also big thank you to my darling @meownotgood for beta reading and revising! and also adding fuel to the aki horny. i give you big kith <3 <3

18+ explicit content ahead. please for the love of god DO NOT interact if you’re a minor.

Aki exhales a long, defeated sigh from the driver’s seat. 

“It looks like we’ll be stuck here for a while.” he says, switching the car engine off. 

It's been pouring non-stop from the moment you left the city, but the rain has only grown heavier, to the point where it's difficult to see the road — or anything, for that matter. All you can make out through the droplet-soaked windows are the elusive silhouettes of houses and the blurred lights from the street lamps. The sky is gloomy and dark, puffy gray clouds obscure the sun. 

The two of you were supposed to be on your way back to headquarters after completing a mission Makima had sent you on. According to file reports and a call she received, the Rat Devil was going around terrorizing citizens in a small district on the far outskirts of Tokyo. 

The mission itself was simple: kill the Rat Devil and report back to Makima upon confirmation of its extermination. By the time you and Aki arrived, almost half the neighborhood was killed — or rather, eaten, so there wasn't any need for search and rescue. The devil was dealt with rather easily. You and Aki would have been at headquarters and done with all of this by now, if it wasn't for the sudden rainstorm interrupting that plan. 

So, here you are, parked at the side of an empty road with Aki, biding your time until the rain stops. 

You're a little bored, sure, but this isn't all bad. It feels good to relax a bit before you have to go back to headquarters; you can already see the giant stack of paperwork waiting for you. 

You hum as you shrug off your coat, before leaning your head against the headrest. You stare out the foggy window; there's a couple of houses up ahead that you can see from where you're parked, and beside them is a small playground. The whole neighborhood looks empty, as expected. You don’t think any kids will be coming out to play in this weather. 

The sound of the rain echoes a rhythmic pitter patter against the roof of the car. It's soothing, like it could lull you to sleep. You allow your tired eyes to close, and you almost drift off, but in a few moments, the sudden realization of being stuck in the rain, all alone somewhere secluded with your boyfriend begins to form an idea inside your head. 

It's not the best idea to be thinking of right now, sure. But considering it's been raining non-stop for ages now, and considering you need some way to pass the time, you wouldn't exactly say it's the worst thing you could come up with. 

You're just not sure about getting Aki to agree to it. You can already hear his response in your head: Really? You want to have sex right now? That's… We can't. Just wait until we get home. 

You've been dating Aki for an entire year now, and sex isn’t exactly new to you anymore, since you both gave each other your firsts on the fifth month of being together. But even now, Aki still blushes whenever you undress in front of him, or when you ask if you can suck him off during foreplay. 

He always tells you that you don't have to do anything for him, because he feels good just by watching you come undone on his fingers, his mouth giving you soft kisses on your clit while his tongue gives you long licks until your toes are curling as you cum. He's still the same as when you first met him, too shy to make the first move, and so dedicated to your own pleasure that he forgets about his own. 

And you know he's definitely too embarrassed to consider having sex in a place like this. You've never done anything remotely intimate with him in any place besides the bedroom. Hell, sometimes he's too embarrassed just to kiss you in public. 

You think you have an idea to convince him, though. 

You turn to look at Aki, who has one hand resting on the steering wheel, his fingers tapping a random beat against it. He rests his chin in the palm of his other hand, elbow on the side panel of the door. The rain continues to fall, drumming against the rooftop, as though it’s trying to flood the empty streets outside, to wash off all that is unjust and evil. 

Aki fidgets in the driver's seat for a moment, before you watch him pull out his pack of cigarettes from the pocket of his pants. He lights one up with the baby blue lighter you always see him use, and then he twists the key in the ignition, putting it in accessory mode so only the lights and radio turn on. 

He rolls the window down enough for him to flick the ashes out of it, making the petrichor invade your nose for a few moments. The rich, familiar smell of smoke he exhales replaces it, the wind drifts the scent towards you, along with the faint warm and woody cologne that emanates from him. 

You gaze at his handsome features in awe, admiring his side profile; the dull luminescence overcasting a shadow on his angular jawline and high cheekbones, eyes of welded iron and a gaze just as hard — Eyes that have seen more than anyone could possibly imagine in one lifetime. An upper lip that protrudes a little further than the lower, and cheeks of dusty pink; they soften his expression, and his demeanor of steel.

You shake your head before you end up getting lost in your thoughts any further. You inhale deeply, breathing in the remainder of smoke, and the gentle scent of the cologne clinging to his clothes once again. 

“Hey, Aki…” 

His attention goes to you the second he hears your voice, deep blue eyes scanning your gentle features and your unreadable expression. He notices that you've taken your coat off. 

“Hmm, what’s wrong?” Aki replies softly. “Are you feeling warm? I can turn the air conditioning on for a bit if you’d like.” He reaches for the air conditioning valve on the dashboard, but you grab his hand to stop him, shaking your head. 

“I’m fine. It’s something else.” You peer up at him through your lashes. His hand is warm. 

“What is it?” There’s a look of genuine concern apparent on his face as Aki puts out the cigarette in the portable ashtray he carries in his jacket. He scans all the parts of your body he can see — your arms, your hands, your neck, your shoulders, trying to see if there's any injuries, worried that you might have gotten hurt from the mission earlier. 

“Are you okay? Are you hurt?” 

You shake your head again with a chuckle, and you grab both of his hands, squeezing them tightly. “No, Aki. I told you, I’m fine. It’s just that...” 

You can't help but trail off; feeling a little embarrassed, you start to fiddle with his fingers, averting your eyes. 

“Spit it out already." Aki sighs impatiently, making you chuckle again. 

“So impatient.” you answer, smirking, to which Aki gives you an unamused blank stare. 

“I was thinking we could do something fun to pass the time." 

Aki raises an eyebrow. “Like what?”

You lean in closer, and since the space between you and him in the car isn’t very big to begin with, your lips are already inches away from his. 

You cup his chin between your finger and your thumb and whisper, “Like this…” 

At once, you've closed the distance, and your lips press softly to his. Aki's eyes widen, but soon, he's relaxing into the kiss, his shoulders slumping, his eyes fluttering shut. The smell of you consumes his senses: vanilla and lavender, utterly intoxicating. 

When the kiss deepens, he can taste the faint flavor of your lip gloss: cherry and mint. He kisses your lips over and over again like he can't get enough, soft but hungry at the same time. 

You move to climb on top of him, and Aki adjusts himself, leaning back in his seat to give you enough space to straddle him comfortably. Your tongue presses to his; you kiss languidly and deeply, taking time to explore each other’s mouths. Your lips feel so good against his own, so perfect. They're fogging up his mind, like you're demanding him to forget everything except for you — and it’s working. 

Your hands grip tightly onto his shirt as Aki skims his fingers down your shoulders and across your sides, resting them onto the curve of your waist. Right now, neither of you are thinking about getting back as soon as possible, or your lives, or anything like stupid devils and more missions. It’s just the both of you focusing on each other, and Aki’s mind is consumed only by thoughts of how good you make him feel. 

You both pull away breathlessly, foreheads resting against one another. Still catching your breath, you roll your hips into Aki's lap hesitantly, testing the waters. Aki groans, but he gives your waist a firm squeeze, stopping you from continuing. 

“We… we can’t. Not here." Aki looks at you through heavy eyelids. “Someone might see us.” 

You slide backwards a little on his lap as much as the small space will allow, until you feel the steering wheel press into your back. Your hand slowly travels up his thigh, fingers playing with the zipper of his pants. 

“Well, I guess we’ll have to be quick then.” You flash him a grin, but Aki stares back with an unamused expression. You reach up, toying with the earring on his lobe, resisting the urge to pinch his cheek. “Come on Aki, we haven’t seen another car for three hours. I doubt anyone’s going to see us in this rain.” 

Aki doesn't respond, so you take matters into your own hands: in a few seconds, you've grasped the button on his slacks and popped it open. You're tugging the zipper down, relieving some of the pressure when you hear Aki inhale sharply, his eyebrows furrowed, but he doesn't make an attempt to push you away. 

“Stop that.” 

His voice is weak, it's shaky, it lacks the bite you normally hear out of him when you're at work. And even though he's telling you to stop, Aki's body betrays him. You can feel the bulge that's forming underneath his slacks, you notice how he lifts his hips a little to make it easier for you to tug his pants down. Your smirk grows wider. 

“Do you really want me to stop?” you hum, moving closer to whisper into his ear. 

“Baby-” Aki quips sharply, almost like a warning, but you continue your ministrations; you rub where the hem of his briefs meets his stomach with your thumbs, you kiss him softly behind his ear. 

“Don’t you want me too?” You pull back to meet his eyes, and you tilt your head to the side, your lips pulling up into a coy smile. Aki's heart skips a beat at the sight. 

Aki swallows thickly. “I…” 

It’s not that he doesn’t want you. It's just that he'd much rather have you somewhere more comfortable, more familiar. When he's looking at you like he is now, his head spins with the thought of driving you home, tossing the door open only to carry you to his bedroom and pin you to the bed. He imagines your hands gripping the sheets, your voice calling his name with his head buried between your legs, his lips on your clit and his mouth on your pussy. 

No, he definitely wants you, and he can't deny it, he can't stop thinking about it now that you've got him started. 

Before Aki can give you a reply, you lean into his neck, giving him a few soft, teasing kisses on his warm skin, before you pull back and look at him again with the same imploring smile. 

Aki sighs, half in annoyance, half in submission. You can see the affection behind his eyes when he looks at you; deep down, he’s a pile of mush, unbelievably endeared to you. He’s helpless when you ask for things out of the blue like this, especially when you give him such a pleading look with those doe-like eyes. 

Aki takes in a long, steady breath before he asks, “Are you sure you want to do this here?�� Wouldn’t it be better if we wait until we get home?” 

“I’m sure. Besides,” You nod softly, smiling, “Don’t you think it’s a little exciting to fuck me in the car?” 

Oh, Aki thinks it’s very exciting. As much as he doesn't want to admit it, he gets a certain rush just by imagining it, it's a kind of feeling he's never felt before. His dick throbs in his briefs when he thinks of fucking you in the backseat of the company car, and in public, no less. 

Part of him is still nervous — What if you both make a mess, what if someone catches you? But another part of him wants to chase that rush, he wants to have you right here, and right now. 

He tries to temper the fog in his head, focusing on the feeling of you against him. It's difficult when his heart is thumping loud in his eardrums, and when his core is thrumming with anticipation and need.   

“I need you, Aki.” 

Sometimes, he swears you can read his mind. 

“I need you too.” he replies, and you don’t miss the faint pink color dusted on his cheekbones. Aki swallows, and he takes a deep breath to steady himself. “Just this once. We'll do this just this once, got it?”

Aki motions his head over to the back seat, and you take the hint, quickly climbing into it. He follows suit shortly after, and everything is a blur of clothes coming off and hungry, heated and sloppy kisses. You're left in just your underwear, and Aki is left in just his loose work slacks. 

You can feel the familiar rush of white hot want course through your veins.You’re sure Aki feels the same way because in between kisses, when your hand goes back to stroking the tent in his pants, he seems to have only gotten harder. You give him one last firm squeeze, pulling away to position yourself on your knees in front of him. 

It's a tight fit; the company cars are spacious, but you're still crammed in between him and the back of the front seat, it leaves you to rest your head on his legs and press your chest to his knees. 

“What… what are you doing?” Aki stutters nervously, squirming a little in his seat when you reach for his slacks. You tug them down his legs the rest of the way until they're pooled at his ankles. 

“Making you feel good.” 

Your fingers feel warm on his skin when you push them under the waistband of his briefs. You help him out of them, his length bounces up to tap his stomach when you tug them all the way down. The sensitive, pink head tingles when it brushes against his skin, causing Aki’s entire frame to shudder with need. 

You waste no time gripping the base of his cock and spitting on the leaking tip, stroking him slowly. Aki spreads his legs a little wider for you as your palm swipes the tip, getting his length wet with your saliva and his precum; the sensation has him moaning in pleasure. 

Barely squeezing, you slowly move your hand up and down the shaft, you snicker a little when you hear him whimper slightly. You pump his cock lazily, and Aki reaches down, grabbing your arm to steady himself, thrusting his hips up into your hand, searching for more. 

And you give it to him; Aki’s head falls back against the headrest with a thud, and he grunts as you start to stroke him faster. “Feels… so good.” 

“More?” you ask, your voice husky. Aki nods feverishly in response.

“God, yes. Please. Don't stop, don't stop...” 

The slick noises filling the car and the sound of Aki's desperate begs add on to the growing ache between your legs, they mix with the echo of the rain tapping the roof of the car and the windshield. He mutters a strained fuck when you wrap your fingers around the base of his cock and bring it to your warm tongue, giving the tip a tentative lick. 

“S-Shit…” Aki hisses, his breathing unsteady, “That's it… Keep going.”

At first, you start by just trailing kisses down his tip to the underside of his cock, and Aki shivers at the faint sensation. When you trail back up, starting to take him into your mouth, you feel his palm lay softly on the back of your head, and then his fingers knot themselves into your hair, gripping tightly, holding the loose strands away from your face in a makeshift ponytail. 

Aki watches you with his jaw slack, he quietly moans your name when your cheeks hollow, your head bobbing up and down his cock at a languid pace. 

Aki grips your hair a little tighter. His eyes meet yours, his gaze is heavy with lust and with love. “So good, you're doing such a good job.”

With your saliva involved, every time you suck on his cock with your lips closed, there's a nasty, loud squelch — It reminds him that this is happening right here, that you're sucking Aki's cock in the backseat. He's in so much bliss he's hardly thinking about it, he can only focus on the feeling of your tongue swirling around his dick, of your warm mouth and the tip of his cock slightly touching the back of your throat when he bucks his hips up. 

He rubs the back of your head gently, his eyelashes flutter when he looks at you. 

“Your lips… They're so pretty.” Aki tells you, and you pull away from his cock with a loud pop. 

“Yeah?” A teasing smile forms on your lips. “And you have a pretty dick.” 

Aki's cheeks instantly blossom with color, petals of dusty rose scattering across his handsome features. His pupils blow out deep, dark and wide. You've always thought Aki has the most beautiful pair of eyes, they're like a door to his soul. Pools of deep dark blue that you could drown inside if you weren’t so busy sucking the life out of him in the back of the sleek company sedan. 

You watch Aki draw his bottom lip between his teeth, hesitating, before finally, he gently pushes down on the back of your head, with so little force you almost don't feel it. 

“C’mon… keep going for me, just a little bit, please. Can you do that?" His voice cracks slightly, his tone high-pitched. You smile, nodding obediently, and you move back down to wrap your warm lips around him once again. 

“Mhmm.” The hum of your voice sends vibrations over Aki's cock, causing him to inhale a sharp breath through his teeth. You look up at him one last time, batting your eyelashes before sinking your mouth down on him completely, taking him all the way down your throat. Tears well at the corners of your eyes, and you shut them tight to will them away. 

Aki cries out, his thighs shaking. He stammers, “S-Shit, baby, too much, slow down...” 

He's trying his hardest not to thrust himself into your mouth. His eyes almost roll into the back of his head when he feels the tip of his cock brush the back of your throat again, and he clumsily pushes your hair behind your ears as you suck eagerly on his cock. 

It's so overwhelming, it's so much, it's more than he thinks he can take when one of your hands reaches up to grip the base of his cock, stroking in tune with your mouth, while the other massages his thigh, willing his legs to spread even further apart. But it feels so fucking good, Aki can't help but melt into you. 

“God,” he groans through heavy pants, “You take me so well, p-please, don't stop.” 

The way your hand glides up and down his cock along with your mouth is making Aki forget how to think straight. He feels dizzy, he knows he's getting close to the edge, and if he lets you keep going, he's sure he won't be able to stop himself from cumming. He grabs your wrist firmly — a silent demand to halt your actions — and he catches his breath. 

In compliance, you freeze, and Aki slips his hand up to hold the side of your face, to cup your cheek and slowly coax you up while he leans down. 

“C'mere.”

He pulls you into a fervent kiss, you press your palm to his chest and push him back into the seat until you can straddle his thighs and settle into his lap. 

Aki can taste himself on your tongue; it makes him feel high, but as you lift your hips, grinding your clothed cunt against his length, getting your underwear soaked and filthy and making Aki moan into your mouth, he suddenly stops you. He reaches down, he grabs your waist and causes you to freeze, pulling away from his lips, a confused expression on your face. 

No, no more. He needs you right now.

“I… I want to cum with you.” Aki admits, breathing hard, “I need to be inside you when I cum.” 

You nod with a gentle smile. “Okay. Of course.” 

You follow Aki's lead when he brings his palm to the small of your back, guiding you to twist and lay down in the backseat. The space is cramped, your head is propped up on the door, Aki has to slot his knee between your legs to make room for himself. The tight space makes it feel like he's even closer. 

Condensation has formed on the inside of the windows from the heat of your bodies. Aki cranes down to meet your neck. Your breath hitches at the first touch of his lips on your skin, right on your nape, and then down, his open mouth wet and warm on the flesh below your collarbone. 

“I’m gonna take your underwear off, okay?” he whispers softly without pulling away. You nod, and you lift your hips up slightly to allow him to pull down your lacy underwear. He tosses them to the side while he continues to leave gentle kisses on your chest.  

“Spread your legs open for me.” His words are like warm honey, sweet and dizzying when they drip from his lips to meet your ears. 

You obey, spreading your legs eagerly, as wide as the small space in the backseat will allow. Aki’s eyes grow dark with lust when he pulls back and sees your pretty pussy glistening in the low light, soaking wet for him — like a blooming flower, filled with sweet, sticky nectar. 

He grazes his fingers up your dripping slit, he sighs the moment he feels your slick drip out onto the digits. 

“God, you're so wet,” he croaks out, slightly breathless. His head dips, bangs hiding his face, and he tries to compose himself. “I'm gonna put one in.” 

Then, Aki is slowly pressing a finger into your tight walls, sinking it in all the way and curling it into your core, causing you to whine and arch your back, your chest pressing up towards him. You wrap one arm around his shoulders, and you grip his arm with the other, your hips bucking up as another finger teases your entrance before sinking deep inside. 

Your mouth falls open, your brows pinch. Aki kisses your forehead, he tugs you closer and leans down to brush his lips over your neck. 

“Feels good,” you whine, and Aki delicately rubs your clit with his thumb, sighing when he feels your walls clamp around his fingers. 

“Yeah?” He kisses your neck messily, curling his fingers into you deliciously. 

“I’m close, I'm close-” 

Your thighs close around his arm, and Aki slows his pace for just a moment. 

He asks, “Do you want me to stop?” 

Immediately, you shake your head, you plead for him to continue. Aki kisses your neck once more before he brings his lips to your ear, he presses his fingers into your sweet spot while toying with your clit, whispering honeyed words into your ear. 

You're so pretty, you gonna cum for me? Go ahead and cum, baby, I've got you. 

You tip over the edge just as he eases a third finger into you. You chant his name, your thighs shake and he drags his soaked fingers out to messily rub your clit through your orgasm with quick flicks of his wrist. 

Aki kisses you as you come down; it's like time is frozen, like it's just you and him stuck in this moment. Your lips melded to his while you breathe life into him, yet at the same time, take his breath away with each kiss you give to his lips. He only pulls away to catch his breath and briefly bring his fingers to his mouth, licking them clean. 

“Hold on,” Aki reaches down onto the floor, searching for his pants. When he finds them, he fishes his wallet out of his pocket, pulling out a silver condom packet. 

“What?” You prop yourself up on your elbows, eyeing him up and down. “Since when have you started carrying those around?” 

Aki replies matter-of-factly, “Since we started dating.” 

You smirk. “We have plenty of those at your house, you know. Thought you didn't want to have sex in public.” 

“Oh, please,” Aki rolls his eyes, “I wasn't counting on using them for something like this. It's just… better to be prepared.” 

It's not a complete lie, although, Aki can't deny he was thinking of the two of you getting caught in something spontaneous when he first slipped the condom into his wallet. He definitely didn't imagine this would be the place he'd end up using it, though. 

You reach up, plucking the condom packet from his fingers, and Aki glances up towards the driver's seat. The sky seems even darker than before, and the rain is still pouring down, battering the glass and obscuring the view. The windows of the car are slightly tinted, and with this storm, there's still no-one to be found. 

You tear open the condom wrapper, and you're sliding the lubricated latex down his hardened cock when Aki turns to look at you again. He settles his much larger hand over your own, he helps you tug the condom snugly on his length. 

“So...” Aki starts, and you look up to meet his eyes. “You were planning on doing this without protection?” 

He's so perceptive, you can't help but laugh. “Maybe. You're right, though. It's better to be safe.” 

Aki's eyes narrow. His expression seems unamused, but the more he thinks about it, the more he considers what that would entail — fucking you raw, the deeper his cheeks redden. Perhaps he should have gone with what you wanted. 

“Hey,” Your voice rouses him from his thoughts, “Sit back for me.” 

As he leans back, settling into the seat, you climb into his lap to straddle him again, pressing your lips to his. Your palms roam up and down his chest, fingertips tracing the scars littered across his toned body. 

His tongue snakes against yours, he kisses you deeply. Your teeth nip at his bottom lip before you detach and kiss his chin, then the edge of his jaw, trailing kisses down his to his neck where you suck beautiful fields of lilac and dusty pink into his pale skin. Aki gasps; his hands drift down your waist, the shape of your hips, and the arch of your back until they begin to knead the soft flesh of your ass. 

You can't wait any longer; you raise your hips and grip the base of his cock, running the tip over your wet folds. Aki looks down, he watches, he bites down on his lower lip. Then, he meets your gaze, his eyes glazed over, his expression pleading. 

Finally, you align his throbbing cock to your entrance, bringing yourself down halfway, slowly. You feel the fat tip of his cock enter you, you feel it stretch you out. Aki throws his head back, his eyes closed. He already feels like he could cum, just from this. Just from being halfway inside you. 

“Shit,” he mumbles, “God, that feels so good, fuck, baby-” 

You're both panting, and you've barely even taken him. 

Aki cracks his eyes open to watch you sink down on his cock, the length slowly disappearing inside you. He sucks a hiss between his gritted teeth when you settle on him all the way, taking all of him in. Your heart is pounding wildly against your ribcage, your head is starting to spin. 

“Too deep?” Aki asks between pants, and you shake your head. A few moments go by, you listen to the rhythmic drum of rain, Aki rubs soothing circles on your back and gives you a minute to adjust. 

It feels so good to finally be inside you. Aki breathes in deeply, he groans when your hips shift. You take another few moments to compose yourself before you lift your hips a little, only to immediately drop back down on his cock, causing a low fuck to escape from his lips. 

You start bouncing up and down his length, and he leans forward, latching his mouth onto your nipple. His hand gently kneads your other breast. You moan softly, hands reaching up to tug his messy hair out of his topknot, until your fingers can run through the strands and your nails can drag across his scalp, making him grunt and his spine tingle. 

“You like that, baby?” you coo, and Aki hums in approval, sending vibrations over your breast. His eyebrows are knitted together, his eyelids are fluttered shut. 

He swirls his tongue around your nipple and kisses your breast before pulling away. Your pace is getting a little faster, a little harder. The car is filled with the sound of skin slapping skin as you ride him, and the needy whines and moans coming from both you and him. 

“I love it, love it so much,” Aki sighs, “S-So wet and tight for me.” 

You grind your pelvis into his, and he grips your waist to help you along. You start to feel Aki raising his hips up from the seat. Ever so slightly, at first, just trying to feel you a little deeper. And then, desperately — he's matching your rhythm and rutting up into you, fucking you as you ride him with needy whines and fragile gasps. 

His expression already looks so fucked-out: his pupils blown, his lips parted, hair down and messy to frame his face. He's practically drooling. 

“That’s it, baby,” you purr as Aki thrusts up into you again, moaning from the pleasure. “Show me how much you like it.” 

“Ngh — fuck.” Your words only seem to spur him on more. Aki digs his nails a little harder into your hips, he shakes his head to get his messy bangs out of his eyes. 

“Oh, yes.” you moan, gripping his broad shoulders to steady yourself, “Right there, please, right there-” 

Sweat drips from his forehead, droplets cascade down his chest. He's fucking right into your sweet spot, to the point where you hardly have to move, you just let him thrust into you. Your ass is slapping against his thighs. Aki kisses your cheek before grasping your chin between his fingers and pulling your mouth onto his. 

The kiss is a wild clash of tongue and teeth, but you break away almost as soon as it begins, crying out when Aki buries himself into you hard. You nuzzle your face into the crook of his neck, gasping over and over again in pleasure. 

Suddenly, Aki's pace starts to slow, he's holding you still and trying to catch his breath. His thighs are twitching, and his heart is pounding, it's so loud he can hear it in his ears. 

“Not… not gonna last much longer like this,” he mumbles, and you sit up to meet his eyes. There's an earnest, loving expression in the back of his gaze when he asks, “Can we change positions?” 

You don't answer, still catching your breath, but you nod your head. Aki rubs your hips, he lifts you and pulls out of you slowly, he kisses your jaw and your throat. You feel his arm curl around the small of your back, and he gently maneuvers your body until you're under him, your back laying flat against the seat. The leather is cool and smooth on your skin. 

Aki takes in the sight of you for a few moments, his eyes scanning your form. He admires the way you're splayed out beneath him; so beautiful, so angelic, as you always are. This time, though, it's a little different. It's a bit different to see you here, to have you in a place like this. It somehow manages to be exciting, but just as intimate as when he has you in his bedroom at the same time. 

He can't hold back from telling you in a sweet voice, “You're beautiful. So beautiful.” 

He closes his eyes, he listens to the drum of the rain for a second. Then, he grabs your waist, squeezing it carefully to let you know he's continuing, before lining the tip of his cock up with your entrance. 

Aki is incredibly gentle when he enters you again, like he’s handling glass, easing inside of you slowly. But once he's halfway in, everything is so hot and wet and tight that he's nearly on the verge of losing control, he has to resist the urge to just fuck you senseless. 

He exhales a shaky breath, you watch as his eyebrows furrow and God, it's so good, he's about to bottom out and it's such a snug, tight fit but it's just so right. All you can do is wiggle your hips and sigh feebly under the pressure, with Aki's forehead pressed to yours as he fills you. 

He places one of his hands on your side, while the other grips your leg from where it's falling off the edge of the seat. He tosses it over his shoulder, he buries himself into the hilt. 

“So good, Aki...” you gasp, your voice breathless, desperate. Aki leans down; his tongue flicks over your earlobe, he takes it between his teeth and sucks. His palms roam your body, gliding over your stomach and your sides. He kisses the shell of your ear, his warm breath fans out over it. 

“God, please.” Your head tosses back, and you're begging for him to give you more, only for Aki to ignore your pleading. 

Your arms wrap around his neck, and he kisses down your jaw, your neck, your shoulders. His lips reach your breast, he gazes fondly at the pretty shade of your skin before brushing his lips over your nipple. He licks it with the flat length of his tongue while he reaches down, bringing a free hand between your legs to rub soft circles over your clit with his thumb. You feel a wave of bliss twist up your spine, your cunt tightens around Aki's thick cock and his whole body shudders. 

A shaky moan comes with your next words: “Aki… stop teasing. Please.” 

You wiggle your hips, you whine and grip his shoulders tightly as he continues to kiss and suck on your breast, humming softly. 

“Need you to fuck me, now, please, Aki?” 

A ghost of a smile forms across Aki's face. He pulls away from your chest with a quiet pop, glancing up to meet your gaze. He mumbles, “You sound so cute… you want me to move, right?” 

He rewards you with the slightest thrust of his hips, rutting himself into you, just a little bit. It's enough to make you gasp, to make you grip him tighter and tangle your fingers in his hair. 

He knows you want him to move, he just wants to hear you say it. 

Face warm and with your eyes screwed shut, you murmur his name senselessly, over and over again like a prayer, a plea. You mutter please, please, please again and again as Aki's lips ghost over yours, and then press to the side of your throat, where he kisses and lightly nibbles, leaving impressions of his teeth. 

He tries to hold out, he tries to tease you as much as he can, only moving slightly, just enjoying the feeling of being buried deep inside you and the sound of your pretty voice. But it's hard to resist you, especially when you're begging for him. He longs to give you everything you ask for. 

“Alright,” he murmurs, voice soft and gentle, “Since you asked so nicely, I’ll give you what you want.”

Aki rests his head on your shoulder, and as he presses wet, open-mouthed kisses along your collarbones, he quickens his pace, thrusting into you with deep, languid rolls of his hips. He reaches for your hands, pinning them above your head and threads his fingers with your own, holding them tightly. 

He pulls back and meets your eyes; your gaze flickers over his and you watch his brows furrow from the building pleasure. Then, Aki leans in, all the way until he's kissing you and his tongue is slipping past your lips. 

He begins to drill himself in fast, thrusting himself eagerly into you with long, deep strokes. The small space of the backseat causes his body to press up close to yours, and the perked buds of your nipples graze against his chest with every abrupt movement. Aki screws his eyes tightly shut, he lets go of your hands to hold the sides of your face as he kisses you. He focuses on the way your nails rake over his back. 

He kisses you leisurely, deliberately, as if he's trying to capture every inch of your sweet taste on the tip of his tongue. You whimper into his mouth; his cock is hitting the spot that always makes you melt, it's causing you to arch your back into him. His tempo doesn't slow, nor does it falter. He continues to pound into you, hitting that perfect spot and causing all your nerves to light up when his pelvis grinds into your swollen clit with each of his thrusts. 

His hand steadies on the curve of your hip, he keeps the connection between your mouth and his as his palm trails lower, further downwards until it reaches the warmth of your cunt. You're soaked with both of your desires, your clit feels slick on his fingertips when he toys with it. 

You grip him tightly, clutching onto him as if your bearings have been thrown and he is the only thing in this world that can keep you grounded — a solid rock amongst the heavy waves. You find sanity in the taste of his tongue, and stability in your hands grasping at his shoulder blades. He's close, so close. 

He pulls away from your mouth, his warm breath mixes with yours, and you immediately gasp, “Don’t stop. Please, don’t stop.” 

Aki responds with a deep groan, his voice husky. “I won’t baby, I’ll give it to you as much as you want.” 

He leans down, kissing the tip of your nose. And then, his tongue presses to your neck, he licks a long stripe up your skin, eliciting a stuttered whimper from your lips. Aki leans his head on your shoulder, he sighs into your nape. It's so cute, it's so sexy that you want him so badly. You're begging desperately under him, when moments earlier you were the one teasing him, like the little minx you always are. 

You're always like this. You can tease him as much as you'd like, but he knows how much you need him. That's why you had him fuck you here, without being patient enough to wait for the two of you to get home. 

The rain is just as steady as it was when you began. It overpowers the echo of Aki's skin hitting yours, it's a quiet sort of lull that soothes you the moment the sound fills your ears. Everything feels slow, warm and sleepy and tinged with electricity. Is this how things always were with him? 

You reach for his face, you cup his cheeks and get him to look into your eyes. “I love you.” 

“I love you too, I love you so much.” Aki responds immediately, breathlessly, and he slows down the rhythm of his thrusts. 

In this beautiful instance of time, nothing matters, absolutely nothing but you. 

You take him into your broad oceans of adoration, care, and unadulterated love. You sweep him out into your calm oceans and away from the rocky shores which expose the jagged edges of his past, a life already lived, that still manages to cut at his bones, that still digs deep into his sanity and claws at the worst of him. 

Right now, you look heavenly, your hair splayed out onto the dark, leather seats, the warm light reflecting off your skin. Aki marvels at your beauty; the way the overcast lighting and shadows from outside cast over you makes you glow as if you're a piece of the moon itself, dislodged and sent down to earth to bring the brightest of lights into his life. An ethereal being for him to love and adore, who he's lucky enough to have all for himself.

Slowly, he works back to his previous pace, but his eyes never leave your form, he never stops gazing at you with such adoration and love. Your heart flutters ceaselessly inside of your chest. 

Honestly, Aki is so turned on he's starting to lose control of himself. The mere sight of you underneath him, in the backseat of the company’s car, in the middle of an empty street — it’s something Aki couldn't have imagined in his wildest dreams. And yet, it feels so lovely to have you here, so perfect, he just can't get enough. 

The simmering pressure that's been building up in him, deep and potent, begins to rapidly pool in his core to the point where Aki is sure he won't be able to hold back for much longer. The coil in his stomach is tightening, winding and threatening to snap. His bottom lip is bitten to hell and back, and his parched throat murmurs your name with a harsh sense of yearning. 

Aki looks down at you with a hooded gaze, but he ceases to break eye contact with you. His forearms support his weight on either side of your body as he continues to thrust in and out, following the rhythm that always makes you come undone for him. 

Pleasure consumes him, it consumes you, you're joined in the most intimate way two people could become one. The act is sinful, but it's coated in the deep bond the both of you share, it's intertwined with pure love and utter devotion. 

“A-Aki,” You sound like you’re on the verge of tears, babbling as you beg, “I can’t, I have to… Aki, please, I-” 

You interrupt yourself with a loud cry, tossing your head back as you immerse yourself in the very peak of your euphoria. 

“Yeah?” Aki gasps back, fucking you deeply, perfectly, in the way that always brings you to the edge for him. 

“Let go, sweetheart.” He's barely breathing the words, he grasps your chin and stares into your eyes. His thumb brushes over your lower lip. “Come for me – Come all over me.”

It’s impossible to say no. Not when his voice is so soft and convincing, so enticing. Not when he's fucking you this good, bringing you to heaven with every deep roll of his hips. 

You can barely hear the rain outside anymore. The only thing you can focus on is the pleasure, the only sound filling your ears is the echo of Aki's heavy breaths and his desperate moans. You want to drown in this feeling forever, you want Aki's sweet words to melt into your skin, to brand you with his mark. 

The whole car is shaking from the weight of Aki's thrusts as he fucks you into the seat. You're right on the edge, and one more deep thrust throws you over; your thighs shudder, you let go with a scream of his name. Aki works you through your bliss, drawing out your pleasure until the feeling of your walls clamping around his cock has him meeting his end along with you. 

He groans your name, his head drops to your shoulder and his eyes screw shut. His thrusts grow erratic, clumsy, he mutters a mix of yes, and, I love you. He spills a warm load inside the condom as your walls throb around him, milking him for everything he has. 

The white fades eventually, like lamplight dimming behind a shade. Your vision is hazy, the both of you are a sweaty mess in the backseat, and when you breathe in, it’s all musky and good and sweet, just the scent of sex and the feeling of Aki's body pressed closely to yours, his arms wrapped loosely around you. 

After a few moments, Aki pulls out of you, and he pulls you close to him so you're huddled up to him. His heart is beating loudly in his chest, and you can feel it against yours. You breathe in and out, deeply, trying to steady your breathing. Aki does the same. Your hearts sync up to the same steady rhythm. 

The afterglow begins to settle into Aki’s bones. His mind is a complete haze of pleasure, and the only thing on his mind is you, you, you. He sits up a little, and he turns to look at you, only to find that you're already staring back up at him with adoration in your eyes. 

Aki stares into them for what feels like an eternity, stretches of time that must only be mere seconds, but feel like they've continued on for decades, horizons far beyond this unfairly short lifetime. Your gaze is his solace, his home. He knows he's too far gone. 

When he says those three words again, it feels greater than the first time, more than the second. As if with every new time he confesses his love to you, the truth of it engraves itself deeper into his being.

Aki breathes, “I love you.” 

You smile, you lean in and kiss his shoulder. “I love you too, Aki.” 

Aki nuzzles your forehead weakly. He gives the two of you a few more moments to regain composure, and then he pushes himself up, discarding the condom and collecting both of your clothes. He helps you get dressed, he tugs his clothes on and adjusts them so they're just as neat as they were before. You hand him his hair tie as you finish buttoning up your shirt, and Aki ties his hair up before climbing into the driver's seat. 

The rain has finally slowed down to a soft drizzle. Thankfully, when you climb into the passenger's seat and scan the road, you don't see anyone on the streets. You lean your head into the headrest, finally feeling the fatigue of the mission and the previous activities from earlier take over. 

Aki looks towards you. He makes sure you're alright, he reaches for the keys and turns them in the ignition, firing up the engine. 

You meet his eyes. One of his hands grips the steering wheel, and the other reaches for yours. He brings it close to his face, he presses a kiss to your knuckle. He lets go and settles his palm onto your thigh. 

“Come on. Let’s go home.” 

a/n: pls forgive if you see any errors, dumblr likes to fuck up my posts for some reason.

[itadorey]

𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐅𝐄𝐂𝐓 𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐍𝐄𝐑𝐒

pairing: hayakawa aki x reader summary: makima thinks that you and aki will be perfect partners, aki isn't so sure. wc: ~1k warnings: smoking, lmk if there's anything else i'm also thinking about making this into a full length fic so lmk if that's something i should do <3

"hayakawa, meet your new partner."

you're... cute. it's the first thing that aki notices when makima waves you into her office. he takes in your appearance as he listens to her introduce you, noticing your bright eyes and shy stare. when you face him with a soft smile, he thinks that you seem to be much more suited for the life of a college student, not whatever the fuck devil hunting has in store for you.

"hayakawa, sir!" you say, sticking your hand out stating your name as he shakes it. "it's a pleasure."

you're cute, but when aki meets your gaze, he sees something swimming in your eyes. it's not the nervousness that most of the new recruits seem to carry. no, if anything it's an almost cocky determination, and aki realizes that the brightness in your eyes that he noticed earlier is misplaced considering what you've just signed up for.

he thinks back to the words he's heard both kishibe and himeno say: "the hunters that devils fear are the ones with a couple of screws loose."

"likewise," he mutters before dropping your hand and taking a step back.

"well, i'll leave them in your trustworthy hands, hayakawa," makima says, smiling at the two of you before taking a seat at her desk. "i'm sure you'll take to each other like a duck to water."

aki merely blinks at her words, nodding once before excusing himself. he's pleased to see that he doesn't have to call for you to follow him; that already makes you better than denji and power. he can't help but wonder how they'll take to you.

you keep up with him easily, looking around as you head towards the exit. the sun is bright as you both leave the public safety headquarters, and you bring a hand up to shield your eyes before ducking behind aki's tall frame.

for once, aki is bothered by the silence that engulfs the two of you. he's used to the new recruits bombarding him with their questions as soon as they step out of makima's office, and he's even used to making them squirm about why they joined public safety in the first place. but the only thing he can hear from you is quiet humming. it somewhat unsettles him.

"why aren't you asking any questions?" he finally says, pulling out a cigarette and placing it between his lips before lighting it. it's a weak attempt to get rid of his nerves. you raise a brow as he comes to a stop, resting underneath the awning of an empty building and leaning against the wall.

"i only have one. can i get one of those?" you ask, gesturing towards the cigarette. aki stares at you for a brief moment, studying you before pulling out his pack of cigarettes once more. he holds them out towards you, watching as you gingerly grab one with a soft 'thank you'. you hold the cigarette between your index and middle fingers, angling it towards him.

"you know what i mean," he says, leaning forward and flicking the spark wheel on his lighter. you take a step back as you lift the cigarette to your lips, taking a drag before sighing softly.

"i don't have any questions, sir."

"why?"

aki's response is quick, and you find yourself stunned for a few seconds before you break out into laughter. he stares at you while you calm yourself, not looking away even when you stand next to him to lean against the wall as well. there's a silence between the two of you as you work away at your cigarettes, and aki finds himself ready to reiterate his question right as you finally turn to face him.

"i already know everything i need to know. i only joined public safety for one reason, after all," you say plainly, taking another drag of your cigarette. aki can't stop himself from giving you a curious glance, the conviction in your tone piquing his interest. you notice his gaze and take a final drag before dropping the cigarette to the floor and stomping it out. when you finally turn to face him, there's a wicked grin on your face, and aki is reminded about how fifteen minutes ago, he thought the life of a devil hunter would be far too hard for you. now, he thinks it's the devils that should be scared.

"i'm here to kill the gun devil."

your statement catches aki off guard to the point that he almost drops his cigarette. it's not anything new. if anything, they're words he's heard from many people before a multitude of times, yet he doesn't think he's ever believed anyone who has ever spoken those words before. but looking at you, standing next to him so casually after saying those seven words, he's half tempted to do so.

"i've heard you're the best person to partner up with," you continue, your gaze sweeping aki from head to toe before you let out an appreciative hum. "i can see why. i think this is going to be a great partnership."

aki can feel the heat creeping up his neck, and he stomps out his cigarette before straightening up and clearing his throat. he's hoping that his cheeks aren't red, but he knows all hope is lost when he sees you're still observing him out of the corner of his eye.

"i think so too," he finally replies, sparing you a glance before walking off. he can hear the excited laugh that comes out of your mouth as he leaves, and he can't help the smile that tugs at the corner of his lips as you catch up to him. "but that means you can't go dying on me."

"i won't."

your response is simple, but firm, and aki can't help but feel like this is going to be a very long partnership.

or at least he's hoping it'll be.

rbs are appreciated <3

[nariism]

chaos makes the muse

pair. hayakawa aki x gn!reader

content: enemies to lovers, fluff, mentions of addiction and smoking cigarettes (negatively, i'm sorry smokers pls look away), reader is a little shit and aki is sick and tired, swearing

synopsis. aki's life is defined by bad decisions and terrible habits. it culminated in you. he's screwed.

wc. 6.2k (oops)

a/n: this is my preemptive apology for all the smokers out there who i just slandered !! i am so sorry i love you. this fic was meant to be experimental with tropes and dynamics i've never tried before, sorry if it's not entirely up to standard :') i really tried my best guys... enjoy!

it started as a challenge.

it always starts as a challenge for aki — from the lit end of his cigarette to the place where it sits dangerously between his teeth. he picked it up as a bad habit from himeno. that was his first challenge; the way he'd adamantly refused to smoke but ultimately caved over a lukewarm bowl of ramen. what a depressing tale.

it wasn't meant to be anything more than a "why the hell not?" sort of defiance against the universe.

he hadn't been broken in by devil hunting yet and didn't need it as something to take the edge off. oh, how he wishes he could go back in time and slap himself silly.

day by day he found his reliance grew. an unpleasant itch in his throat, an insatiable craving that would slam into his chest and leave him breathless at the most inconvenient times. sometimes he would start muttering to himself in irritation when he got that familiar itch right after brushing his teeth.

as he got older and worked a little longer as a devil hunter, he grew less and less sane the longer he went without a smoke.

that was the second challenge; trying to focus on his jobs when his brain was buzzing with need. it was hard to stay sharp when he could feel the box sitting in his front pocket — agonizing, teasing, mocking him.

it's probably the reason he ended up in this mess in the first place, standing across from makima while she lists off all the ways he messed up on his last job. and the list is long. he must have really needed a dart.

so here he is, back turned to the door as he faces makima head-on. his fingers instinctively drum against the pocket of his pants, along the box sitting there, and all he can think is "i can't wait to get out of here for a smoke."

then the door swings open. a chill runs down his spine before he even turns around, because there's a certain air that enters the room unlike any he's felt before.

he's encountered the scariest devils out there. his whole family was taken out by a gargantuan gun-infested lovecraftian monster. but for some reason, aki gets an unfamiliar wave of horror that washes over him when he finally turns around.

"this is your new temporary partner until i'm sure you can be trusted alone on another mission."

and there you are. his third challenge.

you seem too relaxed to have been in this business for long, though it looks like you could only be a year or two younger than him. there's something about you that ticks him off. you're not a fiend — definitely not with how plain you are, but the way you're scowling at him as if he's a disease on this earth makes him second guess it.

aki can't even hear what makima is talking about anymore, too busy melting into a puddle under your heavy, judgemental glare. silence fills the room and aki is acutely aware that he's supposed to introduce himself, but you're too quick to speak and beat him to the punch.

"you smoke," is your deadpan and rather uncalled for observation.

"yes i do. and?"

you scrutinize him with a sneer, clearly disgusted.

"i don't like the smell of smoke. or smokers."

his jaw nearly drops at your bluntness. for the sake of keeping his cool exterior intact, he steels himself and takes a deep breath. it's fine. he knew how to deal with handfuls like you, like denji, like power. trouble kids. this would be easy–

"i promise you, i'll be uncooperative and keep you as a hostage in lower paying jobs until you quit."

"you... can't be serious?"

"dead serious."

"... and who the hell are you again?"

"i don't tell people my name."

"this whole mysterious act sucks. and your attitude sucks, too."

your glare sharpens at his words and you huff like a child throwing a tantrum. he almost wants to laugh at how your expression has changed. instead, he holds out his hand with a resigned sigh. "alright, alright. i'm sorry. my name is hay-"

you slap his hand away; a wordless warning accompanied by another look that makes him shrink back.

"don't care. didn't ask."

makima smiles, cruel and knowing. "i'm glad to see the two of you getting along. you're dismissed."

aki knows he shouldn't be mad at makima. it was his fault in the first place that the devil got away, and only because he was so distracted. this was a fair punishment for such a severe mess up. if this was her way of teaching him a lesson, he would just have to grit his teeth and bear through it.

he stares you down with disdain sitting under his tongue, bitter and unforgiving like the aftertaste of his black coffee in the morning; like having a mouthful of power and denji's burnt breakfast; like the tar that coats his lungs.

"fine then, be that way. nice to meet you, partner."

aki's mornings start slow.

they always have, for as long as he can remember. he wakes up just after the crack of dawn, to which denji has called him sick in the head multiple times for, and spends his time unwinding before he inevitably has to go into work and be on high alert for ten hours straight.

it's a peaceful morning like any other. he's on his balcony overlooking the quiet streets of tokyo. denji and power haven't woken up yet, so he has at least a few moments of solitude (which he so desperately needs, by the way).

he cracks open a new box of cigarettes and shakes one into his hand. he's two seconds away from flicking open his lighter to start his morning smoke when–

"i told you i don't like smokers."

aki nearly falls off the balcony in surprise, whipping around to see the intruder. you're standing there with another frown on your face. he has to wonder if you can smile at all.

"how did you get into my apartment?!"

"huh? the front door. are you stupid?"

"but–" aki's head tilts so that he can peer over your shoulder. there's no sign of anyone else being awake to let you in, which means you must have just taken the liberty of waltzing on in here unannounced. "don't sneak up on me like that. i could have hurt you."

"why would you do that?"

"excuse me? because you just broke into my apartment, for fuck's sake."

"i didn't!" you argue back defensively, fumbling in your pocket to pull out a key. and in that moment, aki realizes something deeply, deeply terrible. just as makima had sprung the role of babysitter onto him with denji and power, she has now bestowed upon him possibly the most irritating human being ever born.

this can’t be happening. he couldn’t possibly get stuck with a third unbearable roommate. what kind of shitty karma does he have?

"i... i need a minute."

your tongue clicks in annoyance. "hurry up. i want to leave for work asap."

"just go in yourself. i can meet you there later."

"i don't have a car."

it's as if thunder claps in his ears. "you... don't... have a car..." he repeats back to you slowly, utterly defeated. "at least let me finish getting ready."

you eye the cigarette still held between his fingers with nothing but contempt. "i don't like–"

"yes, yes, i get it! you don't like the smell of smoke. you don't like me."

your face scrunches slightly as you fall silent. if he didn't think you were being such a pest right now, he might have thought you looked a little cute.

"it hurts my nose."

"you have a sensitive nose or something?"

"or something."

his eye twitches.

aki very quicky learns that when you don't like how things are done, you're very vocal about it. and not only are you vocal, if he ever decided to be stubborn you would take actions into your own hands.

he can't count how many times you've stomped up to him in the middle of a job just to slap the cigarette straight out of his mouth and snuff it out with your heel. he's starting to get antsy because of it.

you're a menace. sometimes he even finds that a box of cigarettes he had purchased the night before has mysteriously ended up drenched at the bottom of the bath. it's infuriating.

he doesn't understand how someone could be so intolerant to a scent. he knew it was unpleasant, but he would like to think that he has impeccable enough hygiene to at least be passable. hell, even denji and power don't seem to notice or care.

(not that it's a very high bar to clear when it comes to them. denji once ate a kid's half-chewed leftovers off the table at mcdonalds and said it was a waste of food. aki was not pleased.)

it's not until he's known you for exactly sixty-two days that he learns the truth. two agonizing months of taking a single drag before you come over to him and snatch the cancer stick right out from under his nose.

aki isn't sure how he never noticed — the minute twitch of your nose when you were drawing closer to a devil. the way your shoulders stilled as you held your breath around denji and power.

he thought you were just a regular human being. he should have known makima wouldn't have paired him with someone normal. you were makima's personal devil tracker.

"it's this way," you tell him as you lead him further into the tunnel. it's almost pitch black. aki can't get a read on anything around him.

"how do you know?"

you look at him with an brow raised, like he just asked a really dumb question. "i can smell it."

"you can smell it?"

"i can smell it,” you repeat in confirmation.

"you're insane. there's nothing down here. let's just go back and regroup with–"

you suddenly swivel around, the flashlight in your hand beaming into his face. he has to cover them with a hand as he scowls at you for temporarily blinding him.

"no! it's here! it would just be easier to find if someone wasn't masking up its scent!"

aki's eyes roll into the back of his head at your little jab. "don't waste my time. i have better things to be doing than babysitting you down here."

he gestures dramatically for you to continue walking, shuffling around in his pocket before pulling out a dart. you glower at him distastefully.

"are you for real right now? you can't go 5 minutes without a smoke?"

he just shrugs, lighting it as he trails behind you. "if i need one then i need one."

"i can't believe you. you're seriously so childish," you sputter out, turning around to glare at him.

aki just sighs tiredly, blowing smoke into your face.

he can't wrap his head around why denji and power have taken such a liking to you.

you're rude and blunt and shameless with your remarks. if he was irrational he might have knocked you out by now for constantly swiping darts out of his mouth.

your relationship is purely obligatory. there's a level of mutual trust between you and him; there has to be for the two of you to be a partially functioning team of hunters — but even then, you bicker. and as soon as you're home, you rush into your room in a flurry of curse words and bites that leave aki grumbling to himself.

he doesn't get it. there's not an ounce of appeal.

you have a plain style and an even less exciting personality. he also thinks you have an ugly attitude problem and act like a brat when you want something from him. he always caves, too, which is the worst part — it's some unawakened big brother instinct that he never got to feel as a kid.

he spoils you too much for your own good. 

don't want carrots in your curry tonight? fine. he doesn't want to hear you complaining about it, or worse, flinging them around the room with power. again.

saw something at the hundred yen store on the way home? whatever. it's just a hundred yen. if you want it then he'll buy it even if it's something as stupid as a charm for your keychain.

and he hates that you find it all so sentimental, the cheap little trinkets he gets for you. he absolutely loathes the fact that you lug them all around with you. they clink and jingle as you walk around, a clear dead giveaway when you're trying to be stealthy during a job.

(the kicker? it's so endearing that he can't even find it in himself to scold you for it. he despises you for making him even consider calling you cute.)

he should have grown a stronger resolve about this sort of thing. otherwise, he would have been coming home unscathed tonight.

he exhales in exhaustion as he watches you retreat into your room again for the night before he shuffles over into the bathroom and sits at the edge of the tub. he had just bought you a little bracelet with a bell charm on it, jingling with every step you took. it was a grave mistake to bring it into enemy territory.

as much as he would love to place the blame on you, he can't. not when you're so much less experienced out in the field than he is, and not when you were so reserved the entire ride home.

it was his fault. he should have known better.

you were eerily silent as you drove (he was in no condition to drive, so despite his reluctance handing you his car keys, he really had no choice). there was a look on you that was unrecognizable — something morphed between guilt and worry.

he usually doesn't smoke in the confines of his apartment, taking his cigarettes outside where it'll smell less. but he needs one badly right now, and who are you to stop him in his own home?

he catches his reflection in the mirror above the sink. it hits him then how much of a mess he is right now; hair disheveled and masking his vision, blood staining his white button-up, sweat sticking to his forehead and smoke rising to veil half of his face.

aki doesn't get paid enough for this.

"you look like shit."

his eyes flutter closed at the sound of your voice from the door. you invite yourself in, standing a few feet away from him with a hand covering your nose.

"smell like it, too."

"yeah, i bet," he mumbles, pulling the dart from between his teeth to blow smoke in your direction like he always does when you’re pissing him off. you wave it away with a scowl.

"that was rude."

"speak for yourself."

"you suck."

"did you come in here just to be a bother?"

your face twists and he almost bursts out laughing at the constipated expression you give him. you fumble a little with your sleeves, gaze falling to the floor as you stand there like a kid who just threw up and needs their mom to come clean it up.

"do you need help?" you ask him, voice nearly inaudible.

he considers it for a second before his eyes drift to the cigarette still lit between his fingers. "no. it's fine. it's probably better if you're not in here with me right now."

"but you're hurt."

"i've been through worse. i'm fine, really," aki raises a brow at you and your strange behaviour, "don't worry about it."

you're silent again for a moment as his words sink in. "i feel bad. i feel like it's my fault." you sound earnest about it, chewing on your bottom lip guiltily.

he exhales loudly in response, shifting his weight a little on the tub so he can unbutton his shirt. "okay, okay. quit making that face. it's creeping me out."

you huff at his words but surprisingly offer no rebuttal. you waddle over to him slowly, brows furrowing further with each drag of your feet against the tile floor. he watches you curiously as you rummage through the sink cabinet and kneel in front of him, body resting between his thighs.

if you can feel how warm he gets from the action, you don't bother teasing him about it.

your nose is entirely scrunched up now, though you do your best to hide your clear disdain for the scent of smoke filling your nose.

"you really don't have to do this. i promise i'm okay."

you leer at him stubbornly and he immediately relents, not in the mood for a petty argument. you work quickly and delicately, wrapping his wound in gauze. it's then that he realizes there's no tiny jingle of a bell filling the air as you move, and he looks down to see your empty wrist.

"for the record, it wasn't your fault," he says quietly, hand stopping yours. you don't try and slap it away this time, but falter a bit.

"... you don't have to try to be nice to me."

"i'm not trying to be nice. i'm just telling you how it is."

"but–"

"no buts."

your eyes meet his as you peer up at him. you stay still for just a beat before you're wrapping him again, careful not to nick his wound.

are you... crying?

it's subtle, the little tears gathering on your lashes. he might not have realized if it wasn't accompanied by the tiniest of sniffles (which makes you recoil back slightly with the intrusion of smoke filling your lungs).

oh no. he's growing a soft spot for you because of this. the most irritating human on the planet, and he wants to give you a hug so you'll stop crying. what the hell is wrong with him.

aki's hand plops onto the top of your head before either of you realize it's happening. he awkwardly averts his stare.

"don't cry. it's ugly on you."

and it really is, because why else would his heart be having such a violent reaction to it?

for a second he anticipates the sharp sting of your hand smacking his away again, or maybe you'll even be so angry that you'll tilt your head up and sink your teeth into him like a rabid animal. 

but you don't. you laugh — a real genuine laugh that makes him dizzy.

he's never been able to picture you with a smile on your face before. you always look feral, like you're about to launch at him and tear his skin off, or so tired that you can't even keep your eyes open anymore.

he sucks in a deep breath as he watches you laugh, blinking the tears out and wiping them up with your sleeve.

you don't say anything to him in response, instead giggling to yourself as you bandage him up the rest of the way. and he doesn't say anything either, not wanting to ruin something so special.

aki realizes that there's still a cigarette he's unconsciously rolling between his fingers. he hasn't taken a drag in so long that it's starting to extinguish itself. and despite the smell of smoke filling the room, you haven't stopped cleaning his wound and wrapping him.

he crushes it up in his hand and drops the ashes into the tub behind him.

he really should quit.

there's a shift in aki in the following weeks.

it's almost palpable — the way he speaks a little softer. a little more tender. kinder. and you can smell it, too; the scent of smoke slowly disappearing over time (not entirely, mind you, but it's the thought that counts).

you first noticed it when you came home from mcdonalds with denji, fries stuffed into your cheeks as you blinked down at aki who was on his hands and knees wiping down every square inch of the apartment.

"come on man, we're not that messy for you to be doing all that..." denji complained while scratching his balls. but aki didn't dignify him with a response, dutifully using a sponge and warm soapy water to scrub at the walls.

you observed him in secrecy later that night, peering into the bathroom as he dumped out the bucket of brown water. he was scrubbing the apartment clean of two years worth of smoke.

it didn't end there. as the months passed, you started smelling it on aki less, too.

once he smoked he would shower right away, even going so far as to pull over on the way home one night and use a public bathhouse. when he could he would change his clothes, too. his sudden change in lifestyle made it significantly more tolerable to linger around him. no longer were you holding your breath until your lungs ached in your ribcage.

aki also took notice of your change in behaviour in response. it was easier to be around you when you weren't constantly whining about his smell.

he didn't think he was being so obvious in the way he was starting to enjoy your company day by day. you still gave him migraines like no other, and he couldn't stand your attitude. but he couldn't help but find your quirks a little charming, at least a bit funny if nothing else.

he wasn't aware that a very watchful (and perverted) pair of eyes was picking up on his signs.

it's a quiet morning with the fan blowing. you and power are still dead to the world and aki has just settled down to have his breakfast.

"so like, what's the deal with you two anyways?"

he glances up from his food with a tilt of the head.

"what are you talking–"

"cause i mean, i totally saw you checking out their ass yesterday." at denji's remark, aki almost chokes on his rice.

"what? i absolutely was not." he guffaws at the blond as if he's ludicrous.

"riiiight... so, you're not into each other then? what's with the looks?"

"what looks?"

denji makes it a point to be theatrical in his renditions of the previous night, sighing dreamily and fluttering his lashes.

"like that."

"... just eat your breakfast, man. you're imagining things."

"nah, but i'm not. c'mon, you don't like them even a little?"

"no."

"liar."

"denji..." aki strains the name out through grit teeth — a warning.

"what'cha guys talkin' about?"

god no. aki can't do this today. not right now. it's too early in the morning.

"we were just talking about how lovey-dovey aki's been lately."

"ohoho, so he finally admits it?" power sits across the table, suddenly interested in conversation.

"i didn't admit anything..." aki puts his chopsticks down with a frustrated sigh, "and what the hell do you mean finally?"

"he totally did admit it. and you should have seen the two of them yesterday—"

"dude, i'm going to kick you in the balls."

"let me have a turn!"

"will you two stop already? i'm getting a headache."

it's a horrible conversation, honestly. a terrible, horrific, unforgiving realization that they might be even a small fraction correct. 

this whole household is the bane of his existence.

this thought sticks with him all day; they're going to be the death of me. why me, universe? why me? it doesn't stop until he finally settles into bed at the end of his long day and lets his eyes slide shut for some well-deserved sleep.

there's laughter echoing in his ears, nothing more than a dreamy hallucination as he drifts in and out of sleep. it's sweet and rare and beautiful — he wants to capture it in a bottle and get drunk off of it.

just as aki is about to fall asleep, there's a gentle knock at the door. he stirs awake again with a soft groan, sitting up in bed.

"come in."

in you walk, hands clasped in front of you as you stare at your feet. "i had a nightmare."

he scoffs, but he's climbing out of bed and trodding over to you anyways. "what are you, a child? what'd you come to me about that for?"

"jerk."

he considers you quietly, focusing on the bags under your eyes and the way you shift uncomfortably under the weight of his gaze.

"well what do you want me to do?"

you chew on your lip for a moment. "can i sleep in here?"

"with me?"

"with you."

aki looks at you like you've lost your mind. "no," he says immediately. you wouldn't get a very restful sleep if you were suffocating in the lingering smell of smoke.

he expects you to put up a fight like you always do when things don't go your way. he even braces himself for the onslaught of names you'll call him.

it never comes. instead:

"okay."

quiet and resigned and tired. and he hates that it makes his stomach drop, because next thing he knows his hand is shooting forward to capture your wrist as you retreat.

"god, quit looking so sad. you're the worst," he tells you as he drags you back into the room and unceremoniously tosses you onto his bed.

"dickwad," you bite back weakly. aki can only roll his eyes in response as he takes half his pillows and blankets to make a temporary bed on the floor for himself. you watch him curiously.

"you're not sleeping in the bed?"

"you wouldn't be able to sleep if you were that close to me."

"... right."

"goodnight," he huffs, settling onto the uncomfortably hard wooden floor. a hush settles over the room and he assumes you've either fallen asleep or are trying to, until you start shuffling around for a couple seconds. he can hear your mouth opening and closing, as if you’re deciding whether or not to say something.

"what is it now?" aki sighs, rolling onto his side to peek at you. you're already facing him, balled up into the blanket.

"can i hold your hand at least?"

he gawks at you for a second before recomposing himself. it's just hand holding, who cares? not him. not even a bit.

(liar.)

"fine," he mumbles, slowly reaching up to offer his hand. you take it tentatively, fingers gently curling around his. his brain almost explodes into malfunctioning, heart stopping in his chest.

you blink at each other, gazes steady and unwavering. then your eyes flutter closed as you pull the blanket up and over the bottom half of your face.

"hayakawa?"

"what?" he studies you, watching the way your expression changes ever so slightly.

soft, relaxed.

"thank you."

some part of aki knows he shouldn't be trying to memorize every part of you like this, but he does it anyways.

devil hunters don't get attached to others. they don't, and they can't. but aki can't help it. it was his worst habit — worse than smoking, actually.

he was always getting emotionally involved when it came to his partners. he couldn't go to sleep anymore thinking about the fact that you would have to go in the next day and face whatever horrible devil got assigned to you. there was a sickness that gurgled in his stomach when he pictured your ragged corpse, unmoving and lifeless at his feet.

it stresses him out beyond reason, even though you're in the next room over perfectly alive and breathing. and when aki is stressed, he reaches for a cigarette.

he thinks he's being quiet, and since you should be asleep he figures just one wouldn't hurt. so he sneaks out onto his balcony for a smoke, leaning over the edge of the railing so that he can observe the empty streets below.

for some reason, he hesitates for a moment as he brings it to his lips. he doesn't even get to light it before he's once again rudely interrupted.

"you're smoking."

it's as if you have a secret sense for when he's about to smoke. or maybe you can just smell them when he taps them out of the box. either way, it irks him.

aki sighs, hand slowly lowering and dangling over the railing. he doesn't even try to deny it as he glances over his shoulder at you. you're leaning against the door frame with your arms crossed. you don't seem as irritated as you usually do, instead regarding him steadily in slight defeat.

it makes his heart ache, so he flicks the unlit dart off the balcony and watches it disappear into the darkness of the street below.

"it's unhealthy, you know."

"i know."

"so why?"

"you think i chose to be this way?" in some ways he did, but he'd never tell you that.

silence befalls you as you join his side, resting your elbows on the railing. it's a calm night; a gentle breeze blows the hair from your face when you turn to look at him.

you wordlessly examine him, and he does the same. you’re more exhausted than usual, wilted like a flower starved for water. he knows it must be draining trying to keep up with someone in a special division — especially since you don't seem to be anything more than a bomb dog for makima, sniffing out where devils are hiding. he doesn't blame you for being so tired.

"hey," he frowns at you.

"what?"

"are you ever going to tell me your name?"

"no."

"seriously?"

"seriously."

he lets out a tiny groan of annoyance before he gets an idea. "if i quit smoking, would you tell me?"

you survey him cautiously. "i'd consider it."

aki runs a hand through his long hair in contemplation, looking out toward the complex across from his. "i don't get how people just quit on a whim. doesn't seem possible."

"they have stuff for that. like, chewing gum or nicotine patches or whatever." he huffs as you continue, "you just need to find something to take your mind off of it. something that satisfies your craving."

"yeah? way easier said than done. also, i don't know if i like being lectured by the likes of–"

"you'd be too irritating if you were addicted to anything else, anyways," you dismiss your own idea, completely ignoring the glare you're receiving from aki.

"you're annoying, you know that? worse than denji. worse than power, somehow." but he wants to take care of you anyways.

"am i?" you challenge defiantly, turning to face him completely.

"the worst. honest to god, i've considered quitting my job because of you." but he hasn't, has he?

"have you now?"

"what the hell was makima thinking, trying to get me to quit smoking by sending her tracker after me?" he should be thanking her, really.

you answer him honestly, voice quiet as you allow him to unconsciously enter your personal space in his rant of frustration. "i don't know."

he only realizes he's standing too close to you when your nose twitches slightly and your brows furrow — indicators that the faint but lingering smell of smoke on him is giving you a headache.

"sorry."

he starts to pull back with a defeated noise, but then your hands shoot forward and gently cling to his sweater. he looks at you inquisitively. you seem surprised by your own actions, too.

aki is forced to reconcile with the fact that he doesn’t want to take his eyes off of you. in his almost twenty-one years alive, he's never stood so close to someone before. it's taking a real toll on him.

a heavy fog of tension settles between you as you stand there, having a stare down both out of stubbornness and curiosity as to why the other hasn't pulled away yet.

"i don't know what's wrong with me... i don't think i want you to go inside yet. stop making me feel stupid," you complain, admitting your words shamelessly.

you watch as aki blinks at you before he shakes his head in exasperation. 

"what am i going to do with you?"

there's a smile on his face as he says it, tiny and subtle. you would have missed it if he wasn't slowly inching closer and closer to you. and you let him despite the suffocating smell of smoke invading your senses again.

it occurs to him that the only things he has ever kissed are his wounds as he dresses them in bandages, himeno when she was wasted once, and the papery end of a cigarette.

you taste much sweeter than any of them.

maybe it was just easy for aki to fall into addictions. he was weak-willed in that sense. always has been.

and he always chose the absolute worst things in the world to get addicted to; revenge, smoking, and now you. he couldn't stand being in the same room as you anymore. not when he so desperately craved your lips on his.

it started as a casual thing; a small peck here, a sneaky kiss there, nothing jaw dropping. and you didn't seem to mind it all too much, allowing him to linger a little longer every time he leaned back in.

it was becoming a problem. a very serious one. he couldn't focus anymore. it was worse than smoking, so much so that everytime he wanted to reach for a box of cigarettes, he would end up coming to you instead.

there was something about you he wanted to preserve. a fondness grew in his heart, replacing the scream of annoyance that would fill his lungs and threaten to spill out every time he laid eyes on you.

you were something he wanted to keep. something to protect. someone to fill the silence when no one else would.

aki liked bickering with you. he found normalcy in it, as if he'd spent his whole life doing it. and sometimes it really did feel that way — as if he'd spent lifetimes before this one by your side.

it's why he clings to you so tightly when he almost loses you.

you're perched in his lap as he holds you, slowly running your fingers through his untied hair. the driver's seat of the car wasn't built for two people to sit; his legs are far too cramped to be comfortable and your knees are pressed harshly into his thighs.

he doesn't care. aki has never cared so much until he met you.

he's robbing you of air, clinging to you so tightly that you can barely move. he can hear you complaining against his lips, but he can't bring himself to stop.

"stop doing this to me," he hisses, knocking his forehead into yours so that he can stare into your soul. "it's ridiculous. i hate you. i hate you."

he kisses you again to bury the familiar lump growing in his throat.

"i told you to fucking stay put. why can't you just listen to me? you could have died. what would i have done then, huh?" you don't answer him, instead cupping his cheeks to try and calm him down.

"you're stupid and reckless and fuck — what would i do without you?" he closes his eyes when your nose brushes against his; a silent apology.

"i hate how much you mean to me, i hate your stupid laugh and your voice and how awful it makes me feel when you look sad. i hate that you keep all the worthless shit i buy you on the way home from work and i hate that you stand so close even after a smoke–" aki's jaw tenses to try and dam the outburst spilling out of him, but he can’t.

"–i hate that i love you. i hate it. i hate you. fuck! i love you–"

he's out of breath by the time he finishes getting his words out, his fingers digging into your hips almost painfully. you blink down at him as you brush the hair from his face.

he’s always so composed, even when he's being mean to you. it's rare to see him worked up like this. you can't help but smile.

"... don't just smile at me, idiot. say something," he pleads quietly, head falling against your shoulder as he keeps you in place.

he squeezes his eyes shut when your fingers thread carefully through his undone hair once again, raking the knots out smoothly. he melts in your touch until your hands leave his scalp and gather up his face again so you can look at him.

there's no tiny twitch of your nose. no furrowing of your brows. no stilling of your chest as you hold your breath. actually, he's never seen you so openly inviting.

"can i kiss you?" aki asks this time, voice hoarse.

you nod, and his whole world comes apart. he takes his time memorizing every curve of your lips against his, the taste of you, the little gasps of air you suck in as he seals his claim on you with his mouth.

"aki..." you murmur his given name against his lips, over and over and over. you whisper it between kisses that leave you breathless. and he swallows your voice, allowing himself to revel in the way his name sounds on your tongue.

he didn't smell of smoke anymore. he didn't taste like death and ash, either — he was just aki.

hayakawa aki, 20, professional devil hunter and resident cynic, who you're hopelessly in love with.

“aki?”

“yeah?”

"do you still want to learn my name?"

© ALABOADOA 2023 — please do not translate or post my works to other platforms.

🏷️ @k0z3me @aanobrain (bye ily hope you enjoy this one art)

crossposted to ao3!

[linkemon]

You're out of touch, I'm out of time (Hayakawa Aki x Reader)

Friendly reminder that English is not my first language. You can check my Masterlists both in English and Polish here. Consider supporting me on Ko-fi. You can also check out my commissions if you’re interested.

Other oneshots can be found here.

ᴀᴋɪ'ꜱ ᴀᴛᴛᴇᴍᴘᴛ ᴏꜰ ᴄᴏᴘɪɴɢ ᴡɪᴛʜ ʜɪᴍᴇɴᴏ'ꜱ ᴅᴇᴀᴛʜ. ꜱʜʀᴏᴜᴅᴇᴅ ɪɴ ᴄɪɢᴀʀᴇᴛᴛᴇ ꜱᴍᴏᴋᴇ, ᴛʜᴇ ᴛᴏᴋʏᴏ ᴍᴏʀɴɪɴɢ ᴀɴᴅ ᴛʜᴇ ᴘʀᴇꜱᴇɴᴄᴇ ᴏꜰ [ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ].

ᴀᴅᴅɪᴛɪᴏɴᴀʟ ɪɴꜰᴏʀᴍᴀᴛɪᴏɴ: 1. ᴏɴᴇꜱʜᴏᴛ ᴄᴏɴᴛᴀɪɴꜱ ꜱᴘᴏɪʟᴇʀꜱ ꜰᴏʀ ᴛʜᴇ 1ꜱᴛ ꜱᴇᴀꜱᴏɴ ᴏꜰ ᴛʜᴇ ᴀɴɪᴍᴇ (ᴀɴᴅ ᴛʜᴇʀᴇꜰᴏʀᴇ ꜰᴏʀ ᴛʜᴇ ꜰɪʀꜱᴛ 5 ᴠᴏʟᴜᴍᴇꜱ ᴏꜰ ᴛʜᴇ ᴍᴀɴ��ᴀ).

Aki took a drag on his cigarette and blew a puff of smoke into the air. The dim morning light slowly filtered through the gray darkness surrounding the city. A shinkansen whizzed by in the distance. The suburbs of Tokyo were coming to life. It was calm. Everything is in its place. And yet he didn't feel like that at all.   

— You only recently got out of the hospital. Already smoking? — A familiar voice startled him. The cigarette froze halfway to his mouth.  

He didn't need to turn around to know that it was [Reader] standing behind him. Apparently he forgot to lock the door behind him when he arrived. He will have to do this. Power and Denji certainly won't do it for him. As he knew them both, after returning from the mission, this would be the last thing they would think about. Their priority was always to demolish the apartment to add him more work.

— What are you doing here? — He dared to glance at her.  

She hasn't changed at all. She looked just like at the time when three of them, including Himeno were still active in the Public Sector of Devil Hunters. Before [Reader] went private. He wished the other woman had done the same. Maybe then she too would wake up for work now, just like him. Maybe she would still be alive.  

— What do you think? — The woman leaned on the railing of the small balcony.  

— You came because — the tremble in Hayakawa's voice was almost imperceptible — Himeno is dead.

— Partially, yes. — She nodded.  

Like him, she stared into the grayish distance. He couldn't guess what was going through her mind.  

— Give me a puff.  

He obediently handed her the cigarette. [Reader] inhaled the smoke, then exhaled it lazily.  

— I can't believe that bitch is dead — she said. — It seems so obvious in our job, but... I never thought it would happen to her.  

Aki was well aware that she and Himeno hated each other. It was a strange relationship that depended on working together when they had to. But they never achieved the same intimacy with each other as he did with both of them. He always felt like there was some bone of contention between them. Whenever he tried to find out what really separated them, they changed the subject. It was so hard to get it out of them that after a while he stopped asking. Only the last letters given to him by the deceased's sister led him to a possible reason.  

It turned out he guessed correctly. The reason women never liked each other was because of himself. The affection they both had for him led to a deep rivalry between the two of them in various spheres of life. Especially professional. Hayakawa Aki was what divided them but also what connected them in a way.  

[Reader] looked at the unlit end of her cigarette. The man never found out how they had fought over him while drunk. She grimaced at the memory. The hair being pulled hurt like hell, as did the slaps to the cheek. Maybe as a hunter she should be used to pain but this was something different than fighting demons. Eventually women landed next to each other, panting and made a pact. Aki liked Makima. Whichever one would ever emerge victorious from this competition, which was unlikely, at least they agreed on this point. She was a harbinger of trouble. There was something mysteriously terrifying and dangerous about her. They were going to do everything to prevent him from ending up with her.  

She flicked away the ashes. There was a time when she withdrew. Much to Himeno's delight. Private work was less stable than government work but it gave a better chance of survival. Leaving Hayakawa at the mercy of her rivals did not make her happy. However, she did not have enough determination to take on the hardest tasks day after day. She wanted to have some peace, so she had to get away from them.  

— They've slaughtered so many people lately that they're looking for contracts with private owners. Preferably people like me. — [Reader] sat on the balcony railing.  

Surprise appeared on Hayakawa's face. Had she really come here to return to the place she had fled from?  

— I thought you were tired of risking your life.

— Let's say I changed my mind.  

He didn't like it at all. He didn't need another person in his life to rest a few meters underground. With the same white cross as the rest of the hunters, in an endless cemetery. A place where the only thing you could hear were black ravens lamenting because of the lack of food.  

— Don't come back — he said confidently, putting out her cigarette in the ashtray.  

She seemed more outraged by the fact that he had taken away her source of nicotine than by what he had said.  

— Just don't give me sentimental talk. If you don't want me in the Division 4, just say so and I'll sign contract with another one. I'll stay in Tokyo anyway, so I don't give a damn what you think.  

— [Reader]… — Whatever he wanted to say got stuck in his throat.  

He was tired. So tired from the last few days that he didn't even have the strength to argue with her. He was still no closer to his goal. The Gun Devil seemed to be moving away from Aki's will for revenge. He might actually have had a chance with Denji but he felt like he couldn't cope anymore. Himeno's death was sort of the nail in the coffin. A border beyond which something inside him changed.  

There was silence, broken only by the sounds of the city coming to life. He felt like having another cigarette this morning. His addiction was just one more thing his late partner left behind.  

— I have two years left. — The weight of these words hung in the cold air.  

[Reader] turned her head towards him for the first time during this meeting and really looked at him. Her face showed sadness, anger and compassion that he hated. She knew well how much of his life the katana had previously consumed. Now his remaining time had shrunk even further. This was his last bargaining chip. Why would she stay here? Even if she managed to survive and get her life together, she couldn't count on him. Soon, he won't be here anymore. He followed the same path as Himeno. Straight to the grave. 

— So I'll stay here for two years — she said confidently.  

It was only when she touched his face that he realized he was crying. [Reader] gently wiped away the salty drops that ran down his cheeks. Aki didn't know why he was falling apart anymore. After all, he mourned Himeno in the hospital. Maybe it still wasn't enough? Or maybe he missed his family? Times that will never come back? Future where he could live normally? Lost years?  

— I promised Himeno that I would take care of you.  

Hayakawa didn't say that this was probably the first time she called her by her name. He had never heard her use this form before. Bitch appeared much more often in her vocabulary. Besides, the woman was not indebted to her. 

The warm embrace he was locked in didn't help at all. He felt like it made him fall apart even more. His black hair had come out of his ponytail and was now falling around his face. He embraced [Reader] like his life depended on it. His fingers gripped the fabric of her shirt tightly. He knew why she did it. She hugged him so he wouldn't look at her face. Because silent sobs also escaped her throat. They might have hated each other with Himeno but she missed her too.  

— Another cigarette? — [Reader] asked, laughing through her tears.  

She hastily wiped her face. Crying didn't suit them. She pulled out the last cigarette from the pack. The same one they smoked when the three of them were still together. He recognized it by the packaging. The fire rising from the lighter danced with a bright flame and immediately went out. A familiar scent rose up along with a wisp of smoke. Himeno should like the taste.

[angstigone]

WARNINGS: mention of barf in your mouth and unwanted advances (from drunk himeno), reader is fem-coded and used adjectives typically female, this was prompted by this post by @noven-warsh saying that aki is always in others' personal spaces and I am still cackling about it, she-her pronouns/afab character

«can't you tell him something?».

«if it bothers you so much, why don't you?» himeno shot back your way with the exhale of smoke falling right into your face. you waved it off annoyedly and sending her a disimpressed look.

still, you didn't say anything; it did feel childish in the worst way to ask to your superior to intervene in a problematic that was between you and a colleague. a colleague that wasn't aware of his staring problem, nor of his excessive disruption of your physical boundaries.

to say it simply: aki hayakawa was always too close to you, invading your personal space as if you had invited to such a thing.

it wasn't something that happened only with you, as you had noticed him getting in the face of a few of the colleagues that bothered him; for somebody who prided himself onto being utterly cool with any outcome, he undoubtedly could be quite hotheaded in temper and such a thing endeared him to you infinitely.

and that's where the problem laid when it came to also his closeness to you. it wasn't necessarily uncomfortable but it was decidedly... too much.

too much for you.

who wouldn't mature the slightest crush towards aki hayakawa: he was just the right side of hotheaded to seem passionate although the obvious death wish he beheld. and maybe that's why he felt so attractive to you.

«... unless...» himeno's implication felt dangerous and you shot her glare although she was far gone past this point «... you like it».

«it's just improfessional».

«I literally kissed you on our first outing together» himeno reminded you and even in that case aki had invaded your space as you had gone out to cool out after the terrible incident; he had brought your face up and suddenly he was too close - the sole person you had wanted to kiss too night - with his lips moving but you didn't hear anything but 'kiss me, kiss me' «... and you didn't report me, but you want me to have a chat with aki about reinforcing personal space».

«he's the sole one who does it among us. while on the clock» you pointed out.

«and you are the sole one complaining» himeno shot back «... if it bothers you so much, put on your big girl pants and tell him that it bothers you. he's strangely obedient when it's a woman he likes giving him orders. and we all know it's either your or miss makima».

you both reddened and paled at the mention of the ghost among you all, but held back.

what himeno had said was the truth: if aki had gathered from a different source that you had said something like that about him, it'd have pissed him off.

«so you are implying that I should discuss about it with miss makima» till you teased your superior as she ditched her cigarette after having stubbed the meager end against her shoe.

«you are smart on the field and yet a pathetic loser outside of it» she teased you as you were about to protest that she was the one who had brought the whole 'pathetic' reputation «... I am sure you'll figure out what I truly mean».

and like that she had moved off although your small talk wasn't finished.

and neither your problem solved as you found yourself out for drinks with the squad, with aki inevitably pressed against you to ask you which drink you'd like.

it wasn't uncomfortable, but it had you flustered and giddy without the need for anything stronger than water.

«I'll be fine with a can of coke» there was no way you'd get drunk after the realization of your own small crush for aki hayakawa, too worried that just the right amount of physical contact and you'd pounce onto him no better than himeno.

that's why you had to keep your distance: himeno was the sole one that matched aki hayakawa's invading of others' spaces and whenever she'd be the one doing it to him, it had him balk in obvious rejection.

he wasn't interested into being returned with such behavior, although you thought it unfair.

you breathed in relief when he went to get everybody's orders as the first turn was on him, but not without feeling himeno's eyes strongly onto you, which you ignored in favor of starting a chat with the person on your side, glad that it continued through the night even when aki settled right beside you - just on the edge of his pillow - as he settled onto talking with who was by his side.

still, the lingering warmth was enough to make you hiss in your mind as you tried not to picture how such a warmth would feel against your body, complimented by aki's own weight.

it had you stammer through your 'goodbye's as you realized that it was almost closing time.

mechanically you got up and were startled when aki held up your coat to you. as you went to get it off his hands, though, he stopped you, instead opening it as a father would do a child and helping you into it much to your embarassment and a drunken himeno's smirk.

«want to make a part of the road to your house together?» all the devil hunters lived near the offices and incidentally most of the izakayas in the area were right near their houses. so you and aki weren't that far apart «... didn't get to talk to you all night».

you flustered as if called out and you wondered whether aki had caught onto your actions of the night of trying to ignore him as you were sure that you'd have to have an uncomfortable conversation. you had to eventually broach the topic that he was close to you in a way that had you uncomfortable because you knew you mistook it for more than it was.

«shit... I didn't realize» her lie was bad but aki allowed to get away with it as they moved onto the road for their apartments while saying 'goodnight's to their colleagues «... sorry».

«it's alright, I just...» and he stalled in his words, enough to get you nervous «... wonder whether I have done anything to make you... uncomfortable».

for a moment, you wondered whether himeno had let her mouth speak up although she had told you to 'deal with it', still, aki's eyes were genuinely concerned as if he didn't know what he had done.

«it's... it isn't anything bad» you started, sure that hiding it any further would have been a bad way to avoid an obvious conversation, although the way with which «... it's just...».

and suddenly he was too close, proving exactly the feeling that you had been harboring for the whole night, as he pushed right in front of you turning around and lightly crowding.

«... I... what have I done?».

«I was about to tell you, idiot!» you felt spurred on by the sudden close quarters, reacting angrily if anything to hide your obvious embarassment «I... you are always in my face, you know?».

was it... that easy to admit it?

although the way aki's face dropped from confusion to something different got you feeling immediately ... worried.

«I mean... I... it isn't that bad, I just...» have the biggest crush on you and yet, you aren't interested in relationships but the way you are always onto me makes me think the contrary?

«... I didn't... realize... I was making you uncomfortable» aki muttered taking, indeed, a few steps back.

"more like you make me feel hot and bothered" you wished to say but held back as an uncomfortable silence settled between the two of you, eventually aki moving in the direction of your apartment out of his own memory.

«it isn't... well, it isn't like that» was that all you could say? «... it's just... it feels... confusing».

and yet, you should have stuck with the phrases of circumstance, because aki turned lightly, turning his head lightly down as if he was confused himself.

«confusing?».

«I meant...».

«if you could tell me that I was bothering you, you can also tell me why you think it's confusing» wasn't he a meanie and didn't you like him more like that?

«because colleagues don't act like this» you shot back, thinking of taking the long road.

«I thought we were friends» and somehow that hurt so much more.

«... neither do friends act like this».

and finally realization seemed to hit home in aki's mind as he looked at you intensely, scrunching up his eyebrows and you were sure that he'd have called you off.

maybe shut down your bullshit or told you that he'd have let you down slowly. instead, he was closer again.

«then I think that my message got across quite well, although I hadn't meant to» was that... was that a confession?

you felt confused even more now, although the way that aki's hand lingered onto your cheek, awaiting for your consent and you nodded softly, now that you knew that you might not be misinterpreting touches.

«... can I get even more in your space, darling?».

[epickiya722]

Haha right? It's so normalized while it's actually so inappropriate to go to a stranger and talk about their sexual preferences.

I hate how "x fans" is called "x fuckers" now. Yeah I like Sukuna. No I don't want to fuck him. But all there is in his tags.

I'd go as far as to say that people don't care about characters. They just want to put them into tropes box to imagine them as their vampire/alpha male/ceo lover.

And I find it ironic how the same will trash talk about fanboys while they do the exact same thing. '"let women be horny" they will say, because reducing a story to you being horny is ok.

I still want to publish my stories because some fandom gave me hope. But I don't hold my breath anymore.

It is very inappropriate. Like, damn, I can't just like the character? I can't be entertained by their antics?

There are just so many things that shouldn't be normalized across fandoms and going into someone's inbox to be like "*insert character* fucker" is one.

Don't get me wrong, I don't mind people having their fantasies about their faves, let alone am I gonna police anybody on or care to. Waste of my time, I got fics to write! Posts to post! 😭

But sometimes I do think "does this person actually care about the character's story"?

Because some of those same people will have so many takes on their faves that don't even be that character. That is a whole OC you created!!

I actually wasn't aware of this until only recently that people accepted for Sukuna to become some absolute horndog when Yorozu was up all over him. Maybe I missed something, but Sukuna only ever expressed being interested in fighting and killing people and personally, he never really came across as some sexual deviant to me.

I feel like sometimes if you have this fanon version of your fave, that is not your favorite. In no way, should you feel the need to like this whole other version of your "fave" in order to like him. Then why have them as your favorite in the first place?

I like Sukuna because he entertains me. He's this evil ass menace who wants all the smoke and the biggest beef he has is with a 15 year old (who is my all time favorite of JJK). Sukuna also this mysterious air about him because we still don't know much about his backstory, let alone everything he can do. (I had this recent thought about a technique that I should probably get to writing.) I have theories about his character, like how he may really be as a person, true. But at the same time, I'm not gonna believe my theories about him are canon because "I know him better than Gege". Anything I say isn't canon unless said so explicitly. I didn't create Sukuna. I am just another fan just vibing along with the story.

And it really is insane to me that people will do that. People were saying "female fans of JJK are ruining the fandom, they're all so horny" as if all us are horny, let alone engage in the anime for said reasons.

The same people *cough cough* misogynists *cough* who say that be the same people who will have a wallpaper of someone like Nami as their header and she'll have boobs bigger than what she has in canon.

Oooh, y'all don't like folks be objectifying the JJK men, huh? Even though for years female characters have gotten the treatment in Shonen. You cannot be dragging Gojo fans when you want to be Makima's dog. Stop that now.

Also, its not just the men! Uh, Yuki Tsukumo exists! She has a lot of fans who find her attractive. There's Shoko, Utahime, Takako, Mei Mei...

I'm waiting for the day 143 gets animated because I just know people are gonna go 👀.

Like, either way, if you're a person who gets constantly horny over your faves, why are you upset with someone doing the same?

I saw this meme post about how people tend to overlook the story and its details and only focus on the attractive cast and fights. And some people were like "but people are only focusing on the fights and attractive cast".

No, they're not. You're missing the point.

For one, you can find the characters attractive and enjoy the fights. That is fine. But at the same time, don't miss the story. Pay attention to it because it's just as important, if not more.

Second, not everyone is focused on just the fights and cast. If that was the cast, why do we have theories and meta posts? Why do we have people writing fics that study the character they're writing about? If no one is focusing on the story and only like the fights and attractiveness of the characters, then those kind of posts from fans wouldn't exist.

[24hlevi]

— faded

chainsaw man characters (denji, power, aki, makima, & reze) x gn!reader

summary: the csm characters as stoners

warnings: language, drug usage (marijuana), suggestive in aki's

this was an impulsive decision but i did it anyway while working on reqs so here

also one of power's hcs repeated idk why my phone hates me 🤷‍♂️

denji -

- would probably die the first time he smoked pot, no matter what he smoked it from he will most likely pass out and not wake up for a good few hours

- cannot figure out a pipe like at all he just can't seem to hold it the right way or how long he's supposed to hold his thumb and then inhale he just cannot do it

- his favorite method is probably a bong like power, the bigger the better for him, he probably threw up the first time though from accidentally hitting it too hard 💀

- denji is okay with joints or blunts, but if you ask him to light it he will say he's worried of burning his face off with a lighter that close (fair tbh) so you always have to do it unfortunately

- he is probably clingy when he's high like reze, except he just lays his whole body on top of you, mumbling out incoherent sentences you can't even understand which is mainly just him saying how he loves you

- denji also gets more jealous easily when he's high, if he sees anyone looking at you in the slightest way he will tell them to back off even if they aren't interested in you at all because he can't differentiate the two when he's high

- denji probably got SUPER paranoid the first time he smoked, thinking there was devils when it was just power or just overthinking everything possible

- he probably smokes with you every few days, not every day but quite often even if he does nothing to help contribute the costs like a fucking scavenger

power -

- does not understand the rules of smoking with others like ashing the blunt before passing it, hitting it twice, or anything it's honestly embarrassing

- does not understand the rules of smoking with others like ashing the blunt before passing it, hitting it twice, or anything it's honestly embarrassing

- she loves hotboxing in a car or just the bedroom, claims it gets her higher faster and it does honestly so she's not wrong 🤷‍♂️

- is obsessed with those gas masks she put one on once and convinced you to buy one somehow and now she is always using it

- power seems like a bong girl to me idk she probably just gets really big ones with pretty designs and most likely one that glows in the dark because she's like a child and gets super excited over being able to see it in the dark

- do not ask this woman to grind down the weed, the one and only time you asked she poured all the buds on the tray and just...smashed them with her hands instead of using the grinder, needless to say she wasn't allowed to smoke with you for two weeks

- power is already a menace, but when she's high it's even worse, she will try to fight everyone no matter the reason, and she yells a lot more, it's a surprise you don't have hearing loss yet with how she screams every word she speaks

- if you were to hand her a blunt with a flavored wrap she would probably hit it once and then just eat the whole thing and then throw up because she literally ate the entire blunt 😐

- power probably smokes a lot after she realizes the effects it has on people, though she's also a scavenger like denji she does nothing to help not even cleaning the bong water for you 😒

aki -

- aki already smokes cigarettes, so he's familiar with the concept of smoking, but smoking pot is a completely different way of smoking than cigarettes to him

- he most likely started out with a joint or blunt, seeing as it's the closest he can get to a cigarette without actual tobacco

- he most likely started out with a joint or blunt, seeing as it's the closest he can get to a cigarette without actual tobacco

- aki probably likes flavored wraps better then cones because he likes having a taste rather than straight weed flavor

- he hates bongs, hates them because he can never seem to take a small hit off one and his head always hurts super bad after taking one hit because he can't control it 😭

- aki is probably okay with pipes, probably the sherlock ones though and nothing with a design on it like a marvel logo or some shit, just a small one that has no design is good for him

- when aki is high he is way more chill and calm when it comes to denji and power and is definitely more comfortable with you, even going as far as leaving little marks on your neck to express he wants something but won't actually say it

- aki also does become more emotional when he's high, he doesn't know or understand why it just happens, he will tear up at certain affectionate actions or when watching a movie and he gets really embarrassed after

- he already smokes cigarettes a lot, so this would be no different pretty much, he probably has one of those cool cases that holds two joints in one that he carries around or mixes them with his cigarettes in the box

makima -

- a blunt girlie there is no doubt about it, she loves all the flavors you can get and actually has a few favorites she really enjoys

- will pay for all of the supplies whenever you need more or just want something new, don't bother trying to pay she will do it anyways

- makima knows how to do o's with the smoke even if it's harder she does it perfectly like 😵‍💫

- on occasion she will use a pipe, though, but she despises bongs and any other method, mainly because bong water gets nasty fast and she doesn't want to bother cleaning it all the time (same ngl)

- everything is super organized and looks like every little thing has it's own place on the tray, she doesn't like when the tray gets a bunch of useless shit on it like stems and roaches from joints she will literally clean the whole thing just to make it look pretty again

- makima does enjoy a edible every once in a while when she's traveling and can't smoke, she usually gets gummies because they hit her faster than normal edibles made by someone else

- she has a roach clip thats probably like iridescent or multicolored or some shit because she likes using that than possibly burning her fingers

- makima doesn't smoke a whole lot, mostly just on her days off and after work but never before work or a business event of some sort, even though she doesn't change much when she is high

reze -

- when i say reze is clingy as hell when she's high i mean literally so fucking clingy 😭 she will be attached to you the whole time, playing with your fingers completely zoning out of everything else

- she probably has a cute little jar she stores the weed in with hearts on it or some shit and her tray is probably some sort of purple galaxy with a lid to cover the contents

- she will smoke out of anything, she doesn't really have a preference she likes all methods of smoking really but she leans towards pipes

- reze is also 10x more emotional when she's high, she could see a puppy on a tv show and would start sobbing uncontrollably leaving you a confused mess trying to help her feel better

- like denji, when she is high enough she will just lay on top of you while hugging you tightly, playing with your hair while ranting about how much she loves you

- she most likely has a collection of custom lighters in a drawer in the bedroom, she specifically likes the old school zipper lighters, probably with cool designs on them like butterflies or something

- reze probably makes really good edibles idk she's the one most likely to know how to bake in my opinion so if you buy the supplies she will make some and it's usually cake so she can decorate it and make it look pretty

- she probably smokes the most out of everyone excluding aki like on a daily she would be high constantly if it weren't for her job, her off days are spent laying in bed smoking and sleeping the whole time which she gets far more cuddly than normal on those days

[ingoodjesst]

while making gifs of episode 7 of chainsaw man, the direction in this scene between aki and himeno struck me because of this particular series of cuts. as aki moves to smoke a fresh cigarette, himeno moves to light it. but despite her practiced action and his instinct to lean in, the camera zooms way out on these two devil hunters. the backalley dwarfs them; we barely see the moment the cigarette is lit.

(this is a slight rewrite of my existing twitter thread, btw.)

lighting a cigarette for someone else can be a pretty symbolic, intimate act - especially for two seasoned partners such as them. why zoom out instead of in? why not let the two share the frame? well, as it turns out, the scene has already been deliberately avoiding showing us both aki and himeno's faces at once.

when it comes to this choice, the anime actually takes a lot of direction from the original manga chapter: aki and himeno don't share a single panel together in this scene... except when himeno lights his cigarette.

so why does the anime deviate? because... aki brings up makima.

it's clear by now that himeno is extremely attached to and extremely dependent upon aki - to the point of being willing to sacrifice denji, just to guarantee that aki lives a bit longer. it's also clear later on that she harbors jealousy towards makima for taking aki's attention away.

so it makes sense for the camera to pull away from them despite their shared moment, despite their lengthy history, despite himeno's intense attachment. because as long as makima's around and aki's in love with her, himeno's bond with him will never be quite close enough.

it's hard to say how much of himeno's affection for aki is just a trauma response to the deaths of her previous partners. but it's certainly tragic, to be hanging by a thread and holding onto someone who can't and won't look your way the way that you want them to.

nevertheless, himeno stays attached; she gets by in public safety with aki by her side and - just like kishibe - with drinks to keep the screws loose.

that said, the anime does give these two one shared moment in the second-to-last cut, as himeno suggests they get makima drunk to learn what's up with denji and why makima cares so much about him.

after all, both aki and himeno are people with their eyes on people with their eyes on someone else...

[copy-trolls]

🖊️ and a eurine bc i like eurine

If she was here she would ask for your pardon because that kind of reads like urine

Anyhow you're here for some crumbs, not to be poked fun at so.

Eurien DOES not need to wear glasses, she keeps and wears a frame of them during reading time because it makes her feel extra smart or when she's reading. Her ass also can't smoke because if she takes a little smoke, she would immediately start coughing her lungs out. Like If you've seen this scene of Makima Chainsaw Man smoking:

Then yeah, that's her and it's embarassing

Other than that, she's a pretty professional lady all and all. Legislacerator was never her first career choice yeah, but she's practically in just for the money and because all tealbloods are shoved into that position whether they like it or not. She's not the disgruntled type because some of the clients she meets are the people she'd like to take a crack at psychoanalyzing.

She also owns a cabinet full of poisons that she likes collecting but that's not important

[radically-bitter-coffee]

I don't mind spoilers about CSM (I've already been spoiled and I don't care about spoilers that much anyway, I think good stories can't be ruined by them) so you can say your thoughts if you want!

Alrighty then!

The thing that would irk most feminists watching CSM is probably this one character in particular: Himeno.

Himeno's character is, when boiled down, very "manic pixie dream girl". She introduces and/or encourages other characters to do "bad" things like smoking cigarettes, drinking, and hooking up whilst drunk. She has her reasons for being the way she is, and I would not say her character doesn't make sense or that these traits and actions come out of nowhere, but you can clearly tell after her death that she was written specifically for a male characters development.

Now, CSM is Not above killing off characters for character development in backstories, male Or female. In fact Himeno's backstory involves lots of men dying.

Himeno's death is definitely written to factor into a male character's development, and even slightly for the protagonist's, but I do think it was a suitable end for her.

Onto the whole hooking up whilst drunk thing though... that was gross, I'll admit. Episode seven is when she encourages Denji (who I think is 16) to drink at a gathering with their coworkers. She gets drunk, makes out with him (it's a gross scene, emeto is involved), later takes him back to her apartment when he passes out (probably due to drinking too much as he's still dizzy/drunk when he wakes up) where they proceed to sleep on the same bed, with her in her underwear and a tanktop. After she asks if he wants to have sex with her but he refuses, he goes back to sleep but on the floor instead. She sleeps on the bed.

In the same scene, right before asking to have sex, she calls another woman a bitch because she finds the protagonist and that other male character I mentioned earlier stupid for crushing on her when she won't love them back. It's a bit reminiscent of reddit nice guys.

This all makes sense with her personality and backstory and all but I do think they were overall... not needed at all. They're so gross that I can't even say they're particularly fan service. They aren't drawn in the typical "huge tits huge ass very saturated blush" way either, it really is just not a nice scene. One could argue they are for her character, and they are, yeah. I don't think it truly justified it though.

Now besides Himeno, I should also not fail to mention that Makima, the character everyone talks of as a femdom, is also not the best. Clearly written for the manga authors fetish, Makima is also definitely grooming the protagonist, even though she doesn't exactly have romantic or sexual intentions with him. While Makima's lack of attraction does change things in terms of whether this would be called pedophilia or not, she does encourage his attraction to her, and promises things like letting him feel her up in exchange for doing things such as hunting a specific creature, and says that she'll let him do more for bigger accomplishments. Her strength as a character comes from being very manipulative, mentally strong, and having Some Sort of Magic.

Again, I have all this to say about Himeno but overall I did enjoy Chainsaw Man a lot. The animation is pretty, the characters both male and female are likable, the world building accomidates the added fictional creatures nicely. The protagonists want to get with a woman is not in the typical shounen perv way, as he wants an actual genuine connection (which is why he refuses Himeno's advances) but finds sex to be a physical representation of that as an emotionally halted teen.

[joltai-showa]

okay it's way too late to continue working on chapter 6 of FQTP and I can't really pull an all-nighter cuz I got medical check-up in the morning for my unexpected job (my ao3 writer notes are gonna be fucking insane), so i'm gonna be rambling about the random stuff that i've been doing today

i finally started doing the natlan archon quest and GOD THE PRIMAL FEAR THAT I FELT IN MY SOUL when Ajaw spoke for the first time

for context i play genshin with japanese voiceover and with the new region we got a number of new characters (welcome to gacha world) and two of them are Kinich and Ajaw who are always attached at the hip but also argue a lot. and whoever is responsible for casting decisions in the japanese department really loves doing silly funny little things, thus Kinich is voiced by Sugiyama Noriaki, while Ajaw is voiced by Takeuchi Junko.

Yes, we've got Sasunaru in Genshin Impact.

This is not even the funniest thing that japanese dub did here. Half of major characters in Fontaine arc were literally voiced by people from the Attack on Titan's cast. Ono Daisuke (and his most famous role is arguably Jotaro from JJBA) voices Wriothesley there. Only in japanese dub Wrio does the "ora-ora" thing. It's insane and surreal and I love every second of it.

anyway, back to the original point, Ajaw appears and he sounds excatly like Naruto. my soul started to leave me when i was confronted with the idea that Kinich is seconds away and can sound just like Sasuke. thank god Sugiyama did the less bitchy and more calm pitch, otherwise i would have been bouncing off the walls screeching like a vulture.

also there was an absolutely hilarious explanation on what a piligrimage in natlan is. close enough, welcome back chunin exam.

at least after the piligrimage your god will resurrect you if you actually die fighting in the war. after a chunin exam the leader of the village will give a pocket knife and, if you are really lucky, a pat on the back. oh, the enemy village is dropping an damn entire cave on your head? gotta pray that your moldy ancestor and his army of undead cacti is somewhere nearby, grandpa hiruzen is too busy smoking that pipe🚬😎🚬😎🚬😎🚬😎

after that i read the latest chapter of csm and HOOO BOYYYY WHAT THE HELL FUJIMOTO

that shit was absolutely insane.

first of all, i am crying from the fact that fuji is capable of writing incredibly complex and realistic female characters, but can not draw them for his life. like lmao what even is that.

anyway, this is the least interesting thing that happened during this chapter, BECAUSE HOLY MOTHER OF LORE BOMBSHELLS WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT

YORU HAS BEEN A MOTHER THIS ENTIRE TIME? MOREOVER A MOTHER OF TWO? THE FANDOM'S BEEN CALLING MAKIMA MOMMY FOR YEARS AND NOW WE LEARN THAT THE REAL MOMMY HAS BEEN YORU?

ALSO HER CHILDREN? GUN DEVIL??? THE SAME ONE FROM PART 1???? THE SAME ONE THAT TOOK OVER AKI BEFORE BEING KILLED BY DENJI????? HOLY FUCK DID MAKIMA REALLY SPEND AN ENTIRE PART MAKING UP BEEF WITH HER NEPHEW?????

(also on unrelated note it's always such a jumpscare/reason to lol whenever there's a sudden reminder that soviet union is still a thing at the end of the 90s in csm lore. thanks pochita)

anyway yoru ate and left no crumbs holy fuck. happy motherhood reveal day i guess, being a terrible mother figure likely runs in the family.

but also it's so funny how the devil family tree is getting to the point where we really should be doing the infographics like JoJo fandom has. for now we certainly know about the Horse(wo)men of Apocalypse aka Conquest (Makima then Nayuya then ehhhh good luck Denji), Famine (Kiga), Death and War (Yoru) and War's got babies in Gun and Tank devils. hopefully in a few years the entire plot devolves into a gigantic family drama i will die from crying of laughter.

(also fuji is so fucking real for making the four of the most powerful devils to be all women. my man.)

but the implications of this chapter are fucking insane, cause are Gun and Tank the only Yoru's kids? Did the Weapon Hybrids use to be her children? Is it possible for Chainsaw devil to be born of her as well? Nuclear Weapons devil is supposed to be inside Pochita and Yoru refers to them as her comrades??? Anway holy shit just what a chapter.

(but also Makima's monologue about getting rid of death, famine and war sounds very reasonable rn cause wtf those insane bitches that happen to be her sisters are birthing into this world)

i am also so insanely hyped for Death Devil, because she is bound to be absolutely fucking insane, like horror beyond human comprehension. also i feel like she has to not only be one of the Horse(wo)men, but a Primal Fear as well like Darkness and Aging (I believe that's what the most recent one was supposed to be)? the entire devil classification system is so confusing lmao

(also i remembered my shock at chapter 167. like. i wrote the finale for LTFG about a month before it was released and then i read it and was like. do i and fujimoto go to the same astral plane where the voices are whispering to us that we must do a handjob in a seedy alley scene? lmao)

[micahtranslate]

Chainsaw Man Starter Rope Cast Interview: Shougo Sakata

How did you feel when you were cast as Aki?

I was half happy and half in disbelief. In my audition tape, I tried not to overact, and I made it to the studio audition. I acted very naturally there, and I felt like the face-to-face audition also went well, so I had my hopes up a little (laughs). There was a bit of time between the audition and when the results came out where I had started to give up, but then I received the response that I passed the audition. The best way to say it is, I was really surprised, but I'm going to do my best to adapt the manga I love into an anime.

What's your impression of Aki; what about him appeals to you?

My impression of Aki is that he's "a normal person." He can deal with all types of people evenly. Aki also wants revenge against a specific devil, but I like that Himeno-senpai provided a space for him to grow up properly. Aki is often said to be kind. He can't accept the misfortune that befell his family, so he can't accept the absurd things that happen to the people around him, so he tries to eliminate the cause. I think that looks like kindness to others. When he beats up Denji, whose very existence an absurdity, I think that was Aki's form of kindness. He believed that it would be better for Denji to give up than for him to lose his life.

How did you create Aki's voice?

Before recording the second episode, where he first appears, I worked really hard to figure out my acting approach, but director Nakayama said, "I want you to act the way the character would naturally and realistically talk. Dial back your acting a little bit." I took that advice, and from there I kept repeating through a process of trial and error, until one day the director said, "Your voice is like Aki's, so you don't need to perform too much." I remember I was very happy when he said that. After that, I was able to loosen up and act naturally.

What details do you focus on when you're acting?

Aki's speech doesn't include any superfluous details, and there are a lot of things that don't require emotion. What I'm conscious of is thinking naturally about "Who am I communicating this information to?" and acting naturally, like I'm drawing from how I normally talk. Lately, it's getting clearer and clearer where Aki is looking, who he is talking to, and what he is trying to convey. But I think I can still get closer to Aki, so I want to focus more!

What's the atmosphere like when you're recording?

The cast members are just like their characters (laughs). Fairouz-san starts conversations, Toya-kun suddenly loses focus, and Kusunoki-san speaks kindly to Toya-kun…Recording always progresses harmoniously, it's a great atmosphere. In particular, Toya-kun is really in sync with Denji, and I love it. No matter what anyone says, Toya-kun's Denji improvisations are one of the highlights. Fairouz-san's energetic, bright and funny energy is also the best, and Makima, played by Kusunoki-san, feels very fitting when you hear her voice. I think this is a result of Kusunoki's love for Makima.

What are Aki's highlights in the early part of the anime?

The way Aki takes out the cigarette is drawn in a really cool way, so please pay attention to it. I only saw it in the rehearsal footage, but the sequence is him tapping the box, taking out the cigarette, lighting the lighter with the hand still holding the box, and smoking it. I thought, "Are you going to draw that many details in the anime?" I was really excited and beyond surprised And… as for Aki, I also love his interactions with Himeno-senpai. Their intimate-feeling conversations are nice. The performance that I personally focused on was the scene where Aki's "ball" is kicked by Denji (lol). I studied vocal expression a lot, so please listen carefully!

Finally, do you have a message for the fans?

My honest thoughts are, I've been given a very important role, and I will play Aki in every episode to live up to the expectations of the fans. I will do my best to live up to the Aki Hayakawa that everyone imagines. I'll keep recording, so I would be happy if you could attend!

Translation notes:

It was hard to translate what the director said in a way that preserves the original meaning, a direct translation sounds a bit like it is an insult or a criticism. What Nakayama was saying was basically that Sakata's natural voice was already great for the role. The literal quote is "坂田くんは声帯がアキだから、「こう演じよう」としなくていい", so a more direct translation would be "Sakata-kun, because your voice is already Aki's, you don't need to perform like this." but that isn't the clearest. I went for more of a localization than a direct/exact translation to be clearer.

When Sakata says "肩の力を抜いて演じられるようになったのはそこからですね," a direct translation would be "I was able to act with my shoulders relaxed," meaning he was able to loosen up and act more naturally, but a direct translation doesn't convey that as well.

Translated "どんどん明確" as clearer and clearer, but a more literal translation would be "steadily becoming clearer," or "increasingly clearer."

Sakata says "中でも戸谷くんの演じるデンジはシンクロ率がとても高くて", which literally translates into saying that Toya and Denji have a "high synchronization rate," kind of using the language of mecha anime (how the pilot is synchronized with the mecha), but to be more clear I just translated it as "Toya-kun is really in sync with Denji"

"デンジな戸谷くん" would literally translate to Denji-like Toya-kun (using Denji's name as a na-adjective), but since the main point of the sentence was to highlight Toya's improv skills, I didn't translate it in that literal sense.

He literally says アキの「ボール」, so this feels like the best way to translate it.

[kats-fic-recs]

Chainsaw Man Fic Recs because I fell down the rabbit hole

Disclaimer: most of this is just straight up found family fluff with no plot

Justified Presence

"Would that make you happy?" the Angel asked, looking back at her. "If I had fought him every step of the way, would you be okay with me being here?"

Power didn't say anything. The Angel Devil's lips twitched mirthlessly.

"Would you be happy if I'd never met him?" he tried again.

"Hey," Denji hastily interjected, "No one's saying-"

"He would be safer," Power said.

-

Or; In another world, the Hayakawas run away, but Power can't come to terms with their tagalong.

Almost Close

"Riiiight, you've got your terrors to look out for," Himeno drawled. She leaned back on her stool, the low back only barely keeping her from toppling over. Her hand reached into her pocket to pull out a lighter and a pack of cigarettes. Normally, she wouldn't be quite so quick to smoke inside an establishment, but something told her that it wouldn't be a problem here. As she lit a cigarette and raised it to her lips, she asked, "What's so horrible about them?"

Aki's eyes were trained on the cigarettes. Himeno passed him one. However, before he could also grab the lighter, she pulled her hand back. "And don't say it's because they're devils. I want you to get creative."

-

Or: Aki complains about Denji and Power. Himeno makes observations.

The Kitchen Devil

Power had just about accepted that today was going to come dangerously close to sucking when Denji declared, "We should try cooking for Aki again."

The Reason I Can't Sleep

Aki finds out about Himeno and Denji.

Two Truths and a Lie

“Ooh!” Power said. “Let’s play Two Truths and a Lie!”

“A game?” Denji asked, cocking his head and twisting his lip as his feet drew to a stop.

“No, Power,” Aki said. “Not a good id–”

“No one’s ever asked me to play a game before!” Denji jumped onto Aki’s couch, landing his knees hard in the springs. “How do we play?”

Power tossed her long hair over her shoulder and raised her chin. “The rules are so simple, even you two should be able to comprehend them.”

into the sublime seas

Power is not afraid. She is watchful.

The Hayakawa Family Goes Bowling

Aki didn't think this was how he was going to spend his day off. Surprisingly, he doesn't mind that much.

Or

The Hayakawa Family (+ Angel) Literally Just Go Bowling

Cold Feet

Aki should've told Makima to fuck off when she told him Power and Denji would be moving into his apartment.

He's glad he didn't.

Cold Feet

When it is time to go to school, Denji eats the breakfast Aki prepared for them, as well as the toast with every possible topping on it that Power shoved towards him. Power doesn’t eat her share of Aki’s homemade breakfast and demolishes a bag of convenience store bread Aki bought last night. It’s not like he’s there to tell her no, since he leaves early in the morning to commute to his job.

Denji doesn’t even know why Aki bothers cooking for her at this point.

A day in the life of the Hayakawa family.

the reliever

Aki had this set of rules regarding smoking.

First, he had to tell himself three times "no, you can get through this" every time he felt the urge.

Second, he would only take one and only one cigarette.

Third, last but not least: never smoke in front of Power and Denji.

Meowy Come Home

In which Power learns what it's like to live with humans, and Aki learns what it's like to live with cats.

days like television

Occasionally growing a chainsaw for a head has made him realize he can adapt to pretty much anything.

single slow desire

“I’m in love with you,” Aki says tonelessly, tapping his cigarette out. He lets it fall to the sidewalk, turning away before it hits the ground.

“Oh,” Angel says, just as tonelessly. “That’s fucking tragic, Hayakawa.”

a recipe for disaster

You’re not doing this because you care about them, Aki tells himself. They’re fiends through and through. You aren’t allowed to care about them at all.

(The fact that he has to remind himself of this has kept him up late at night more than once, staring at the ceiling and wondering why, why, why.)

Aki learns how to cook.

seraph’s nest

And still, the thought of Angel—Angel’s mouth—cannot bear to rid itself.

How the breath of Death, Aki wonders, could feel so warm.

Weaponized Incompetence

The only thing that really seems to make Angel behave is some little act of service.

(Or: Angel Devil Manipulates and Mansplains Aki into being his Malewife)

Self-fulfilling Prophecy

The Future Devil showed Aki a vision, an image of the Angel’s gloved hands cupping Aki’s jaw as he slipped his thumb into Aki’s mouth.

“No,” said Aki, aloud. “No, that’s not going to happen.”

-

After asking the Angel to wear gloves to work, Aki has visions of the two of them in a compromising position together.

[abigail-nicole]

Chainsaw Man Ep 7 - watch thread

#chainsawman Ep 7 - strong tw underage grooming, VOMIT lol if ever vomit needed a tw it's for this fucking episode, undertones pf veers into date rape territory & the usual tw for extreme violence that’s really more feature than bug for csm. is this also going to be two parts? maybe

This covers a couple of different chapters of the manga and there's a tone shift (which signifies where the manga chapter split up). I believe it's 18/19 if you're keeping up. I personally only started reading the manga after episode 6 because it got me clown face emoji!!!! Anyway I will keep these recaps SPOILER FREE from the manga perspective. I may comment on "this does relate to the overall themes of the series" but not tell you any specifics of what happens.

anyway let's get into BLOOD and then OUT FOR DRINKS that is ep 7:

Building tension is more narratively important than resolving that tension. That’s why, once Denji realizes he can keep feeding from the devil as he’s killing it, we don’t need to see more of that battle.

the "I'm a fucking perpetual motion machine!" is a moment of real triumph because that's all we, the viewers, need to know that This Is Over And Denji Is Winning

the Etetnity Devil KNOWS POCHITA FROM BEFORE, says THIS — that’s the important moment, narratively, from this battle

WHAT WERE YOU BEFORE, POCHITA? HOW DO OTHER DEVILS KNOW YOU, CHAINSAW DEVIL?? WHY ARE THEY SCARED OF YOU?

the monologue from master here (coupled with this intense face scar) is so fucking good. The extended metaphor about having a screw loose IS IMPORTANT TO THE THEME OF THIS STORY YALL:

Also the mere fact that we get this flashback through Himeno's POV is a) giving us a Himeno characterization, namely that she is still afraid:

(this after master's line about "can't be unhinged without loosening the screws a bit every day" in regards to his heavy drinking, which is also a great fucking line)

and b) characterizing Denji through seeing how other people view him, which is UNHINGED! INSANE! SO CRAZY IT ACTUALLY MIGHT WORK! which is not a bad tagline for makima's entire approach to Denji and the Gun Devil lolololol. Because Denji, as a POV character, has all the self-awareness of a 16yo boy (haha which is none).

the battle doesn’t need to be on screen all three days when you can use VISUAL STORYTELLING

(i just love power wearing her shoes in bed like a fiend. ha, ha, plop)

and then, in thirty seconds, tension cut, Public Safety Devil Hunters out!

The Himeno/Aki "Arai and Kobeni feel guilty about trying to kill Denji. Didn't you try to kill him, too?" and Himeno's "Kids these days! So sensitive!" is both funny but also Aki has pointed out multiple times, even before this mission, that he would not hesitate to kill Denji and Power if he felt necessary to do so. I don't think he expects Himeno to actually feel guilty, but is just probing her for her feelings.

Spouse pointed out that Holding cigarettes with a hand cupped is how you smoke in the rain & Himeno is doing this because she’s used to things being splattered

Then of course the actual most important plot revelation this episode: 

Denji’s age reveal!!!!! 

WANNA TALK ABOUT GROOMING MAKIMA-SAN?

HIS IS YOUNG EVEN IN UNIVERSE. OTHER PUBLIC SAFETY DEVIL HUNTERS THINK HE’S YOUNG, REGARDLESS OF HOW VIEWERS SEE HIM.

And this CHANGES A LOT OF THINGS about this show!! For me, anyway, it did!!! Like! Denji is drawn like any anime protagonist, frankly, anime protagonists all look the age of anime protagonists so there is no visual indicator of how young he is UNTIL THIS. This throws all his earlier character arcs into SHARP,  SHARP relief. Like of course he is obsessed with touching boobs, he’s a sixteen year old boy. He barely has a prefrontal cortex. 

the narrative is not condoning his actions, we as viewers aren’t getting gratituous upskirt shots or boob focused shots like actual fanservice anime would do. This age reveal is bringing us, as viewers, into a world with frankly very realistic and unsexualized portrayals of female characters. The animation and rest of the story has NEVER been on Denji’s Touch Boobs level, and even goes as far as mocking him constantly by other characters in universe. 

And I would also argue that the way you can take advantage of horny 16yo boys because they won’t say no to any sex act is a HUGE part of his arc. Because now we and his coworkers have to contend with Denji’s immaturity as a literal teenage boy. 

Also Himeno saying this, when she later kisses Denji in an extremely unfortunate way,  takes Denji home without his consent, and then OFFERS TO HAVE SEX WITH HIM like Himeno. 

So here we have the question: Does this make her a bad character? 

and here’s the beauty of CSM: it DOES NOT CARE if this makes her good or bad. We’ve gotten intimate portrayals of Himeno, both good and bad, showing her possessiveness over Aki who barely seems to return her affections (but who knows with Aki), her helping Denji by pulling his chainsaw string during that fight, maybe saving his life, but also she tried to kill him, and also only decided to save him when she decided it was in her self-intrerest to do so. 

In fact, you could ask: does anyone in chainsaw man do anything that doesn’t serve their own self-interest? And the only answer is maybe Denji. Aside from helping Power save Meowy (you could argue he did it for the boobs), he saves multiple bystanders while fighting devils, and that one guy in a car he didn’t save when the bat devil taunted him for saving innocent people is our example that proves the point. Or is it????? Does anyone in chainsaw man perform any action that doesn’t directly benefit them? Let’s continue that thought later. 

let’s instead talk about Denji’s Horny Is Makima Watching? First Kiss: 

 kinky. But I’m not mad at it (yet). Not actually mad about making out with someone while the person you actually care about watches. I am mad about The Vomit Kiss, however: 

So I’m thirty, and I’m a surgeon, and I handle combined blood and feces together on the reg, and my disgust tolerance is extremely high, and THIS HITS IT. So I am not going to actually examine this in the depth that I usually would, because…..I  do not want to. But suffice it to say that: art is something that elicits an emotion from you, and disgust is an emotion,  and the disgust and shame and pity elicited by this scene fucking WORKS. 

i know viewers see this as sad/hilarious (& it is) but narratively they are going with ACTUALLY TRAUMATIC TO DENJI, because we immediately get a Pochita flashback, and Pochita flashbacks only happen when we're getting moments of Purity and Innocence:

and then a smash cut to Denji throwing up on the toilet while Arai (god bless) helps him and rubs his back. This is a sixteen year old whose first kiss was someone vomiting into his mouth. Like, immediately. And that’s pretty fucking tragic. He then gets taken home by Himeno, against his knowledge, in a scene that veers pretty sharply into date rape territory, though tbd if they’ll actually follow through on the sex (especially since they've now rammed home that it's SEX WITH A MINOR, which still matters in this universe, as evidenced by coworker reactions to his age). 

It will be interesting to see what Denji’s line is when it comes to Horny Sixteen Year Old Boy versus Someone Who Wants Meaningful Experiences with Makima. Hoooo boy. Episode 8, bring it on. 

For episode 7 bespoke credits we get this lovely sexy/gross vaporwave sequence. s/o to MAPPA (& their terrible working conditions) who as always throw their senior class ass-first into the animation meatgrinder and produce michelin star animation for Chainsaw Man from their animators’ dead bodies. 

[impider]

go to your spotify on repeat, put on shuffle, and list the first ten songs! ( i'm also going to attach some lyrics and the muse that they remind me of hehe. under a read more for long post ).

venus in gemini  —  dezi — " thinking you're scared of me by the way you talk, boy. 'cause you know i could be all the things you're not, boy. all bark, no bite, baby, you're such a decoy. neck between my teeth just like a dog toy . . ." ( areum )

i hate boys  —  yung cxreal, baby frankie — " i hate boys, so fucking much. i hate boys. ya'll fucking suck . . . " ( leisha )

video games  —  sun — " baby, lights up and leave 'em on me. put that thing down and get up under. your skin taste to kiss over on me. time to focus on me . . . " ( leisha )

disco ball —  echo huang — " wandering around, just to find a place to stay when the rain drops. looking around, just to see the sky's bluer than i thought . . . " ( hana )

buffy  —  piercetheskies — " she call me daddy, tell that bitch it's yes sir, got five bitches on me, yeah, this shit is absurd. if you see me with a shawty, then you best address her . . . " ( kulta )

glock in my lap  —  21 savage, metro boomin — " get your baby mama 'fore we bend her (21). hit the windshield, not the fender (21). givin' out smoke my agenda (21). throw the white flag, they surrender . . . " ( kulta )

such a whore ( stellular remix )  — jvla — " you such a whore, ooh. i need her, when she on me, i don't feel so lonely. don't leave me horny, ride me like a pony. her sweat, her moaning, she's just such a fucking whore, i love it . . . " ( leisha )

moment  —  victoria monet — " so let me take away your pain, give me all of your emotions. land it like a plane on my back if you can't hold it. life is but a dream that you manifested slowly. so fuck a fantasy, this your motherfuckin' moment . . . " ( ezra )

makima!  —  overpade —" shawty make me wanna, make me wanna blow away. wrapped up in her head like some new braids. said i wouldn't fall in love but its too late. chainsaw, chainsaw what's my mood today . . . " ( kulta )

westside  —  keshi — " you need to weigh your options. all you do is talk about the "dream" or what you call it. is it everything you wanted . . . " ( shiloh )

tagged by:     my baby @indiefilm

tagging:     anyone that sees and wants a fun little muse activity !!!