#maker im still bad at tags

[theidiotwhowritesthings]

A Fresh Start [5]

Din Djarin x F!Reader

Warnings: use of fake name, reader’s on the run, grogu is a menace, jealousy, pining (is that a warning?)

Word Count: 4,913

Summary: When you made plans for your future they never involved being hired by a Mandalorian to baby-sit his adorable, green gremlin of a child. However, after your life fell apart in the span of one disastrous night,  you found it to be the only feasible option you had left. Nevarro was a  far cry from Coruscant, but the thriving community turned out to be  exactly what you needed. Every day you spend in Nevarro you fall more  and more in love with your new life, but when your past rears its ugly  head you find that perhaps peace wasn’t meant for everyone.

Ch. #05: WIFE MATERIAL

Chapter Summary: Nima thinks you and the Marshal are cute. Cara thinks you and the Marshal are cute. Mayfield just runs for his life.

     "too shy to say, but i hope you stay." -Billie Eilish  

 Two weeks flashed by in a blink of an eye, and Din Djarin and his son had fallen into a new routine⏤ one with you as a staple addition to it. Din had been so sure that their lives had been perfect on Nevarro before you, but you swept in and created a space for yourself that was now essential. The sound of your voice, your laughter, your steps padding across the floor had seamlessly become a part of the soundtrack of his and his son’s life.

 “The wheels on the bus go round and round, round and round,” You sung to Grogu who mumbled the repetitive words while miming the spinning motions you made with your hands. His large brown eyes were focused on you with great intensity. “The wipers on the bus go…”

 “Swish, swish, swish.” Grogu mumbled the words in Basic while waving his arms side to side to mimic the motion of wipers. You clapped your hands excitedly, and Grogu giggled and bounced at the praise.

 Din leaned against the wall with his arms crossed as he watched the scene unfold in the living room. Grogu had finished with breakfast and now sat on the couch in your lap. He was half tempted to call Cara and let her know he was taking a sick day. If he wasn’t so sure she’d see through his excuse and mock him for it, he might’ve tried.

 You turned your head to meet his gaze, and Din tensed at being caught staring. He pushed off the wall and walked over. You lifted Grogu in the air, rocking him to make him laugh, and Din scooped him from your hands to curl into his chest. “Are you having fun, ad’ika?” He asked as Grogu buried his face into the crook of his neck. “Are you having fun with Soran?”

 “ ‘lek!” Grogu cooed.

 “Do Mandalorians have any rhymes or songs?” You asked.

 Din titled his head. “I know a lullaby, but it’s not like the ones you sing with him.” He rubbed Grogu’s back. “Thank you for the songs.” Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion, and Din elaborated. “Grogu has gotten better with some words in Basic. I was worried.”

 “Don’t be.” You rose from the couch and walked around to stand beside him. “The book I’m reading says that kids who are raised in a multilingual home take a little longer in their language development. It’s completely normal.”

 Your words soothed his quiet concerns. To be honest, Din hadn’t been as worried about Grogu’s speaking habits since you arrived simply because he had become more vocal. Add to that the fact that he’d be starting school next week, brightened his mood even further. Grogu would only learn more and more from there. Din began to walk towards the door while still cradling his son in his arms. You stayed one step beside him with a sweet smile decorating your soft features. The warmth in your eyes when you stared at Grogu always brought a smile to his own face.

 “I’ll bring home dinner from the new place that opened up in the plaza.” Din said. “Don’t worry about cooking.”

 “Ooh, yum.” You playfully tugged on one of Grogu’s ears making him squeal again. “Hear that? We’re getting noodles for dinner tonight.”

 The dinner situation had oddly been settled without much discussion. A pattern had just clicked into place. Din would come home and remove his helmet to eat with Grogu while you got some time to yourself, then you would come out to watch Grogu while he cleaned up from his day out in the city. Finally, he’d don his helmet once more and the three of you ended up spending time with one another before Din would take Grogu to bed. Sometimes, you’d even eat dinner with them. Din and you would find a spot on the floor, like a picnic, and sit back to back while Grogu ran circles around you both sneaking food from every plate he could touch.

 “Noodle.” Grogu bounced in his arms and repeated the word over and over as if the chant would bring forth the food immediately.

 Din held his arms out for you to take Grogu from him. “Only if you behave, ad’ika.”

 “Tell your dad that you always behave.” You gasped, as if appalled at his statement. “You’re a little angel, aren’t you?”

 “ ‘lek!”

 Din chuckled with a shake of his head. He loved his son more than life itself, but angel would hardly be the word he’d use to describe Grogu’s menace-like tendencies. It was his mischievous nature that Din loved so dearly. If there were trouble in a nine mile radius, Grogu would find it. And if there wasn’t? His son was hardly hesitant in starting the mayhem himself.

 “Oh,” You said abruptly, “Don’t forget, Grogu’s appointment is at 2 today.”

 Din nodded, thankful for the reminder, and mentally made a note. This would be Grogu’s first appointment with the local physician and he wanted to be present for it. He believed you to be more than capable of taking his son on your own, but Din worried how Grogu would handle being in a medical facility. He wasn’t sure how much Grogu went through while in Gideon’s hands, and Din wanted to be there to support him in any way that he could.

 “Thanks. I can meet you there.” Din replied. He leaned forward to rest his forehead against Grogu’s⏤ smiling when the boy wrapped his arms around his helmet in response. “Be good, ad’ika.” Din leaned back and after a beat he offered you a small nod. “I’ll see you this afternoon, cyar’ika. Call me if you need me.”

 “I will. Bye, Mando.” You replied. As he stepped out the door, you stayed in the doorway to allow Grogu to wave at him. Din smiled to himself and readjusted his gloves to give his hands something to do. He would be lying if he said that he never had the urge to rest his forehead against yours when saying good-bye in the morning. A fact that he tried very, very hard not to think about.

 You sat on the couch reading one of the many books from your past library on the holopad in your hands. As it turned out, after successfully guessing your last used password from a year ago, you were able to access all the books you had downloaded during your training years. Right now, the relevant ones you were reading all dealt with pediatric development and care. It hadn’t been a topic that particularly interested you back then. You learned what you had to in order to properly treat any younger patients, but that was it. Now, you found the topic exhilarating.

 The more information you absorbed the better prepared you were to take care of Grogu. That was your thought process at least. Doing a good job was about more than just ‘doing a good job’. Grogu had quickly become an important part of your life, and you truly cared for the little boy. More than just Grogu, his father had grown on you as well. Living in this house with them, becoming a part of their daily routine, made you feel like you belonged somewhere. It was something you hadn’t realized you missed until you got a taste of it once again.

 “Patu.” Grogu cooed.

 You looked up from your holopad to see him standing at your feet holding up a piece of paper. He had been drawing on the floor in the middle of the living room. “What’s this?” You set aside the holopad and picked him up. The picture he drew was a scribbled version of you holding a mass of green with big arms. “Aw, is this me and you?”

 “ ‘lek.”

 “I love it.” You said with a waver in your voice. A picture drawn in crayons shouldn’t mean so much to you, but you were already making plans to frame the paper and hang it up on the wall where you could see it every single day. “Thank you, sweetie.”

 You pulled him closer to cuddle him in a hug, but Grogu surprised you by lifting his hands to pat your cheeks. The cheek patting was hardly new, but then he lifted his head to press his forehead to the middle of your face⏤ the closest he could reach to your forehead. It was the action you watched Mando do to Grogu all the time. A sign of affection. As if the picture wasn’t enough to send you over the edge. You felt your eyes well up with tears and felt so silly at the notion that you couldn’t help but let out a laugh. Grogu pulled back and tilted his head in question.

 “Happy tears. I’m happy.” You shook your head and lightly bopped him on the nose with your finger making you giggle. “You made me very, very happy.”

 If there was one thing you had learned about yourself in the three weeks you had been here it was how unhappy and alone you were in Tatooine⏤ hell, even in Coruscant this last year. You knew, you understood, but you hadn’t truly realized until you began to make new connections. It was all so overwhelming and it left you an emotional mess.

 “How about we leave the house early?” You sniffed. “We can go say hello to Peli and Nima, and then pick up lunch.”

 Grogu was just as happy as you assumed he’d be at the prospect of leaving the house. It took you only a few minutes to clean up a bit and get Grogu into his pram before the two of you were out and traveling to Peli’s shop. In your time here, you had learned the layout of Nevarro well enough to get around without much issue. There were still a few places you needed instruction to get to, but you were fairly proud of how settled you had become.

 You heard Peli’s shop before you saw it, and Grogu’s pram sped up a bit in excitement to see Peli. He zoomed through the shop with practiced ease and you followed behind at a casual pace. It seemed the shop wasn’t overly busy and Grogu led you through the garage out to the back yard which Peli used more as a junkyard.

 “Green bean!” Nima yelled in greeting.

 She poked her head up from a pile of scrap metal to bounce over to the pram. Peli followed next and both women stood around Grogu cooing and chatting with the small child. You chuckled and lifted a hand to wave. “Hi. I’m here too.”

 “Yeah, but you’re not nearly as cute.” Peli replied bluntly.

 Nima lifted her gaze to you with a shrug. “No offense.”

 “I’ll try to push through the pain, but I don’t know how I’ll sleep tonight.”

 Peli picked up Grogu and began to bounce him on her hip to his delight. Nima tickled his belly once before drifting closer to where you stood. She crossed her arms with a smirk. “Things seem to be going good.”

 “Yeah.” You nodded. “They are.”

 “Well, I am very happy for you,” Nima set her hand on your shoulder, “But I am also incredibly disappointed because now I don’t have a drinking partner.” You let out a laugh and gave her a light shove. Nima decided to wrap her arm around you instead. “Real talk though, it’s good to see you enjoying yourself. You can show me gratitude for finding you the job by joining me at the cantina tonight. It’s singles tuesday.”

 You shook your head. “Okay, first off, why would they have a singles night on a Tuesday? Why not the weekend?” Nima just shrugged. “And unfortunately I can’t. Mando is picking up dinner for us from that new noodle place.”

 Nima pulled her arm away to pout. “Can’t you just take your part to go. Hanging with me tonight will be so much more fun than eating in your room alone, I promise.”

 “I’m not gonna eat in my room.” You shrugged. “Usually when he brings dinner home, we eat together. We just pick a spot on the floor and sit back to back. That way I can’t see his face while he eats, but we both get to spend dinnertime with Grogu.” Her comical pout slowly turned into a mischievous smile. You furrowed your brow at her in mild concern. It was never good when she got that look. “What?”

 “Marshal Mando is bringing dinner home for you guys to share.” Nima repeated what you said, and you weren’t sure what she was getting at. “Together. Kind of like…” You raised an eyebrow at her, and she shimmed her shoulders, “A date.”

 Your eyes widened. “What? No. No, no, no. It’s not like that. It’s not romantic.”

 “You sit on the floor together. Food spread out around you like a picnic.” Nima said slowly. “How much space is there between the two of you? Or do you literally sit back to back?” At her question, you felt your cheeks grow warm in embarrassment. It was literal. The two of you didn’t necessarily touch, but the last time this happened if you had leaned back even a little you would’ve been able to rest against his back. Nima bounced in place. “That’s so cute! Ah, okay, you definitely can’t come to singles night then.”

 “Stop.” You held a hand up to point at her. “You always do this. Remember when you visited me during training and convinced yourself I was having a love affair with my professor?” Nima’s features turned sheepish and she mumbled a response under her breath. “What was that?”

 “I was wrong.” Nima sighed. “But in my defense, the two of you had some very intense chemistry.”

 “We didn’t. He was married. To a man.” You shook your head. “You literally imagined everything. To which, I will commend your active and creative imagination, but you’re wrong.” You reached out and placed both your hands on her shoulders. “I love you, but you’re very, very wrong.”

 “Boo.” Nima dragged the word out, her pout returned.

 You laughed at her disdain and she easily rolled into a rant about a customer she had to deal with earlier in the day. Her claim about Mando lingered in your mind, but you shoved it out of your head with gusto. Your first week here had been a bit awkward, but the last two had been a dream as everything seemed to fall into place. Mando had become your friend. It was more than you could ask for considering he was your employer. The last thing you wanted to do was mess that up by catching feelings.

 “Hey!” You and Nima paused in conversation to see Peli coming over with Grogu. “Bright eyes here is hungry. You gotta get him out of here before he starts snacking on my stuff.”

 You held your arms out and Grogu excitedly leaned out to fall into them. “Are you hungry, sweetie? You wanna get lunch?” He clapped his hands and you chuckled. “Alright. Say good-bye to Peli and Nima. Can you say bye?” Grogu waved his little hand and you decided to continue holding him rather than setting him back into his pram. “I’ll see you guys later.”

 “Message me if you change your mind about tonight!” Nima waved.

 You walked out of the shop with Grogu’s pram following after you. Mando had taught you how to program it to the arm band he had given to you. Nevarro’s streets were busy and you greeted familiar faces and you passed them. Anytime you had Grogu with you, more people stopped to say hello just so they could have a moment with the adorable child in your arms.

 “Hey,” You held Grogu’s hand and his small fingers wrapped around yours, “We were supposed to meet your dad at 2, but should we pick up lunch and surprise him at his office?”

 Grogu squealed in agreement and you were unsurprised by the response. You had learned that Mando was a fan of the sandwich shop owned by a local couple and as you’d have to walk by it anyways to get to the station it seemed ideal. It didn’t take long to pick up some food, and the owners had gifted Grogu with some free, blue cookies.

 It didn’t take long to get to the station from there, but in that time Grogu had managed to gobble down every single small cookie they had given him. You set the bag of food in the pram so you could brush the crumbs off of his clothes. “I’m starting to think you eat this messy on purpose, kiddo.” He giggled innocently and you shook your head. You picked up the bag of food again as you entered the station. One of the two rotating receptionists sat behind the desk as usual. “Hey, Thilxi! How’re you today?”

 “I’m doing well.” The Rishii woman replied. Her feathers were a mix of black, tan, and a pretty shade of orange. “Are you looking for the Marshal?”

 “Yeah, is he in?”

 “Mhmm. Go on back.”

 You thanked her and took the side hallway to get to where the actual office sat. The only person sitting in the room was Cara who was currently reading through a holopad. She lifted her gaze at the sound of your approach and a smirk crossed her features. Before you could speak, she called out, “Hey, Mando. We got some citizens here with a request.”

 You recognized the sound of Mando’s heavy boots. He began to ask what he was needed for, but his modulated words came to a halt, as did his stride, when his eyes landed on you. Mando’s head tilted in question. You held up the bag of food with a smile. “Lunch request.”

 “Buir!” Grogu blurted. “Skraan. Skraan, Buir!”

 Mando chuckled and crossed the space in a few easy strides and scooped Grogu from your arms. “Hey there, ad’ika.” He rubbed his son’s head and tugged lightly on a ear making Grogu giggle and grab at the hand. Mando focused on you. “You didn’t have to do this.”

 “We were already out.” You shrugged. “Figured we could just leave from here to the clinic. You aren’t busy are you?”

 “No. Not at all.” Mando nodded his head back toward the doorway. “We can sit in my office.”

 “Skraan.” Grogu grabbed at the edge of Mando’s helmet.

 “Call me if you need me.” Mando said.

 Cara, who was still grinning, nodded, “Sure thing, boss.”

 “Nice to see you, Cara.” You gave her a small wave before following after Mando. She returned your greeting with ease. You hadn’t actually been to the back part of this office yet, but through the door was just another short hall that led to a generator room, a storage closet, and Mando’s office. There was also a door at the very end of the hallway with an ‘exit’ side hanging above it.

 Mando set Grogu down on his desk while you glanced around. It was a small and rather plain space. A large window on one side allowed natural light in, which was nice, and there was a desk in the center of the room. The swivel chair behind the desk was olive in color and it matched the double cushioned couch sitting under the window. Behind the desk, on the wall, were a few drawings made by Grogu.

 “What does ‘skraan’ mean?” You asked. “Is it like ‘hungry’? I always notice he uses it around the time I’m about to feed him.”

 Mando let out a short laugh. “No. Fair guess though. It’s slang for ‘meal’.”

 So the green gremlin was just demanding his meal time. That sounded about right. You set the bag of food on the desk and Grogu immediately rushed to grab it. Mando scooped his son up again before he could shred through the brown bag to get to his sandwich.

 “No, no.” Mando said. Grogu let out a soft whine. “Be patient.”

 You began to unpack the bag while glancing over at Mando who was bouncing Grogu while chatting with him softly. As you began to throw away the bag into a bin nearby you heard Grogu patting his hand against his father’s chest repeatedly.

 “Oh. You know what? He hasn’t used the bathroom since this morning. I can take him.”

 “Don’t worry. Start eating, I’ll be back.”

 You watched Mando leave with Grogu and turned back to the food. In the silence, it occurred to you that this was a half planned idea considering it wasn’t like the two of you could just sit on the floor here. You rubbed the back of your neck and tried to puzzle this out.

 Din’s morning had been busy. There had been a mess on the tarmac where scheduled landings got tangled up causing a number of near crashes. The team there should have been able to manage it on their own, but tempers flared and he got called there to witness. Din spent his morning babysitting temperamental pilots and flight crews.

 Needless to say, he really should’ve tried to call in sick.

 Din kept telling himself he’d at least get to see Grogu and you sooner than dinner time because of the clinic appointment. He never expected you to show up at the station with his son and lunch in tow. Din was beyond grateful for his helmet because if Cara saw the dumb smile that spread across his face she never would’ve let him live it down.

 He stepped out of the bathroom with Grogu only to immediately be met with a sly grin on Cara’s face. He slumped with a sigh. “Don’t.”

 “I didn’t say anything.” Cara replied. Din tilted his head in exasperation and Cara just laughed in response. She leaned back in her seat and crossed her arms⏤ preening as if she had just won an award. “It’s just… interesting.”

 Grogu grunted and began to pat his chest again. Knowing exactly what his son wanted, he knelt over and let Grogu down. He didn’t hesitate to rush away back to where his food was awaiting him. Din turned back to Cara and he pointed at her. “No.”

 “Soran bringing you food and a visit from your son in the middle of the day just for the hell of it before you both take him to the doctor for a school registration check up feels very⏤ what’s the phrase I’m looking for?” Cara hummed then nodded her head. “Domestic. Wife material.”

 Din set his hands on his hip and chose to keep his stance as casual as he could. His face felt hot and he knew he was bright red under his helmet. He already knew how attached he had become to the domestic energy that surrounded his home life. From day one, Din enjoyed that. Even back when things were still awkward, the moment he came home that first day to dinner being ready and Grogu calling out to him he had been hooked to that lifestyle. It was after that, much more recent, that Din realized it wasn’t just the domestic nature of things he was growing attached to.

 It was you.

 Din liked coming home to you. He liked watching you sing and dance with Grogu in the kitchen every morning. He liked the moments he got alone with you. It had been an accident the first night he stepped out of his room after putting Grogu to bed and ran into you in the kitchen. He had donned his helmet just to go get water but stayed there for a full hour just to talk with you. Now, he made it a habit.

 You were the first woman he had any semblance of feelings for in quite some time. In the past, any sort of attraction he felt was easy enough to ignore. He’d climb aboard the Razor Crest, fly off to work on the next bounty, and that was it. It was done and over. Din was learning that trying to ignore an attraction he felt for someone he lived with was much, much more difficult. He had to forget it though⏤ had to push it aside. You worked for him, and Din would never forgive himself if he jeopardized the new routine Grogu had become accustomed to. If he made you uncomfortable, chased you off, Grogu would miss you so much.

 Cara making comments with the words ‘wife material’ was only going to make this a million times harder.

 “The two of you are cute is all I’m saying.” Cara shrugged.

 Din grunted out a response which made his Deputy just laugh. He sighed and left for his office. It only took him a few steps in the hall before he heard Mayfeld’s voice. When Din got closer, he could see you sitting in one of the seats parked in front of his desk, Grogu in your lap eating, and Mayfeld was leaning against the front of his desk right beside you.

 “I can’t believe you haven’t been to Jay’s place yet.” Mayfeld chuckled. “Best place to eat in all of Nevarro. No doubt.”

 “Oh yeah?” You asked, helping pinch off pieces of Grogu’s sandwich so he didn’t just inhale the entire thing⏤ a terrible habit his son still had.

 Mayfeld shifted on the desk so he was closer. “They have some great mixed drinks too. Maybe I can take you some time.” Din felt his chest tighten in discomfort. A flash of anger mingled with the new sensation, and his hand curled into a fist involuntarily. “You free this weekend?”

 Din took that as his cue to close the distance. He didn’t like the idea of Mayfeld taking you anywhere at any time. He didn’t even like the idea of Mayfeld thinking about doing that. You let out a light chuckle and shook your head. “Sorry, I’m busy this weekend with, uh, Mando. He said he’d take me to…the…lava plains?”

 “Mando?” Mayfeld repeated. Din saddled up to stand in view and leaned against the open doorway with his arms crossed. Mayfeld’s eyes drifted over to him and Din could see panic settle in the man’s eyes. “Mando!” He scrambled away from you and nearly fell when he reached the end of the desk sooner than anticipated. “Hah, hey, I was just keeping⏤ I didn’t know she was⏤” Mayfeld motioned toward you then shook his head. “I’m gonna go work.”

 In order to leave the room, Mayfeld had to walk past him and Din didn’t make it easy for him. He stayed exactly where he was, following the man’s movement slowly with his visor, as Mayfeld struggled to squeeze past him without actually touching him. When he stumbled out and hurried away, Din looked back to you who stared at him with a wide grin. He felt his irritation melt away at the look on your face.

 “He’s nice.” You chuckled. “Also, sorry I used you as an excuse. I kind of panicked when he asked me out.”

 Din shook his head. “That’s fine. I don’t mind.” He straightened his posture and hated how awkward the next words out of his mouth felt. “Do you… Do you      want to see the lava plains?”

 “It’s on my to-do list for sure.” You nodded. “I feel like every time I walk down the street I hear one of the droids advertising the plains and the hot springs.” You handed Grogu another bite of his sandwich. His child was so enthralled by the food that he was barely aware of anything happening around him. “Besides, anything would be better than going on a date with a stranger. Nima asked me to go to this singles event tonight, and I have no idea how she can go to those things.”

 Din stiffened at your words then scolded himself for growing tense. You weren’t his in any sense other than employer/employee. Din had no claim to you whatsoever which meant he had no right to feel any shred of jealousy⏤ either with Mayfeld or with you attending a singles event. He was paying you to watch Grogu and, by association, paying you to be around him. Besides, it was foolish of him to think this wasn’t something that would come up. You were a ray of sunlight after a dark and stormy day. You were refreshing. A breath of clean air after months of stale hyperspace. Smart, funny, kind, caring. Not to mention gorgeous. Maker, Din would crawl across the sands of Tatooine, under both suns, armorless, if it meant he could just touch⏤

 No. He had to stop. That line of thought was the opposite of helpful.

 Din cleared his throat. “You and Nima?” He tried not to let any disappointment show. He steeled his voice with practiced ease. “Are you going out with her tonight? I know we haven’t talked about it, but if you need a night off…”

 “No way.” You grinned then motioned to Grogu who was still happily settled in your lap. “I told her I was busy. I got a date with this cutie and some noodles.” You tickled Grogu who squealed in response, eager to play. “Don’t I, sweetie?”

 Din was smiling like an idiot again.

 Maker, was he in trouble.

[myketheartista]

CW for blood and non-canon character death/nightmares

Today marks a year since I did this animatic revolving around Aiah’s fears and concerns about Polor’s well-being as well as her own nightmares since the events on Buttoncraft have made her feel a bit paranoid about herself and her neighbors. I remember speedrunning this in a day or so after I initially heard the song, and I kinda lost any sense of my surroundings LMAO but I was really happy with it back then and I still am now even though there are definitely some things I wish I had/could polish up when I first made it (canvas sizing, anatomy). Regardless, I know this song still pains me /affectionate every time I listen to it,, these two really do give me brain worms =w=

Polor (green) belongs to @artistic-fuss and Aiah (purple) belongs to me, of course! The split second of PATC-H (blue) belongs to @shepscapades (our blorbo robot <3)

Song is FEEL SOMETHIN DIFFERENT by Bea Miller, Aminé

[pondering-gales-left-orb]

this was originally tags on a re-blogged post but i had so much more to say so here we go

THE QUNARI AND WHY YOU ALL SHOULD BE NORMAL ABOUT THEM

the qunari story and lore drives me insane with how the fandom treats them

because we see them form the eyes of feraldans and orlesians and kirkwallers we never get a look form the inside

we only see what they see and they only see the military side so ofc to them they think they are all rigid and strict! even when you try to know more from the qunari we meet, they only talk about their training and military life which is normal ask any army soldier about his daily life and he wont talk about the flowers he saw walking down the street obv

the three Qunari characters that we see are literally the military convoy dispatched to another kingdom, the fucking president who is also the leader of the military forces, and the secret police guy (not even mentioning the actual straight up army and army general we meet in trespasser) why would they present as anything but scary intimidating and imposing when talked to by strangers??

everything anyone is gonna tell that is bad about the Qunari im gonna tell you you dont know if every single Qunari does these things do they all believe in force conversion? the Full Qun is not taught fully to everyone you only get taught the relevant parts to you and your potential, only the priests know it all, so how many Qunari actually know and agree with the actions of the secret police and conversion army?

the military and police training even in our world includes a great deal of unlearning kindness and care and relating to people and involves a great deal of dissociation but do regular people do that to?? do the Qunari people learn to disconnect the same way a ben-hassrath does? the logical answer is no because why would a baker or a shoe maker or a tailor need this heavy military training?

both Sten and iron bull once they get to know you TELL YOU that you cant judge the qunari based on them only, there are a whole nation of regular people in there that just living their life they do not have the harsh life the military trained have, they laugh around the fire and enjoy life in their own way and its different but not at all at the same time

the fucking arishock himself tells you you cannot inquire about regular qunari life from him because he is not a regular person he is a military man -the leader- he didnt live the life you are asking about he didnt learn the answers you need

when Wynn says to Sten "your people dont seem like music people" and he calls her out on that saying" based on what how do you know that?" and proceeds to tell her that he is not the equivalent of his people not every person is like him and he doesn't represent the nation as a whole they have music and art they have fun they have a beautiful life just not him in that moment because he has a job to do away from all that

in the fade you see his memories of relaxed qunari having fun and laughing and making fun of each other and that's STILL his military coworkers

do you think a regular ass Qunari that's like a cook in a tavern is gonna talk so much about the re-educators the same amount as bull?? do you think they even interact with them beyond childhood education (aka school....the part of the qun they need to be a cook)

all three of them ask you is that bad? is that worth destroying like your people think? do you think they are savages like your people think? compelling you to think beyond them to the people of par vollen

and im sad the fandom doesn't think about these questions critically and just generalizes the military experience on the nation of Par Vollen and by extension the Tal-Vashoth too

for example do you think the baker in par Vollen wants the Tal-Vashoth dead or is it just the military leaders? i bet if you go to a par Vollen vegetable seller and tell him "the Arishok is going to hunt Tal-Vashoth tomorrow" hes gonna blink twice and then say "alright....anyway so are you gonna buy something ?"

the transition of iron bull from Qunari to Tal-Vashoth is supposed to show you that regular people on both sides don't reflect the military goals of the leaders they both just want to live a fulfilling life how ever different that is from what we consider a fulfilling life and we get to see what that looks like to Qunari through the tender moments shown to us like with Sten and the whole charges and the bull story, the ones who want them dead are the military

but no the fandom has decided All Qunari bad All Qunari fascists or whatever as if the military goals of the chantry are better somehow

but then they give andrastian people grace they dont afford to the Qunari even though they are both regular people that follow two beliefs that doesn't consider the small folk in anyway shape or form as anything but fodder to further their ideology but one of them only has their death justified and accepted while the other are allowed to live and are given a plethora of excuses

[transgenderastarion]

hello baldurs gate 3 community again: This time im talking about modding!

hello adventurers and shifty-eyed people, I bring to you some important stuff. Mod compilations! Below the cut, if you are interested, I have compiled a few things for what I think the bg3 tumblr modding community wants (based on me being in the tag for a month straight). Things I have compiled include: - Super basic install of baldur's gate 3 mod manager (and a bit of vortex) (9 Easy Steps!) - My OWN special "Computer helper" mod bundle with super easy installations (helps it run on my piece of crap laptop who hates me so much but I love her <3) - Companion and player mods (visuals only, and like de-ab-ing and stuff, I'm not going around adding all the extra eye colour mods) INCLUDING TRANS TOP SCARS AND DADBOD MODS + MORE - Some personal favourite mods that really helped enhance my experience. Enjoy! (if you enjoy bg3 modding, please consider reblogging because I think posts with links are still shadowbanned in the tag lol)

HOW TO GET THE MOD LOADER FOR BG3 IN 3 EASY STEPS

go to the github download page and scroll down until you see the first downloadable file that reads "BG3ModManager_Lastest.zip"

extract the file into an accessible area (your downloads folder should work fine, I just put it on my desktop) (just anything that won't require you to give admin permissions to download it. I would also keep this off Local Disc (C:) for convenience) You can use any free extractor program, 7zip works, i used to use Peazip and now I use Breezip and that works well.

Tada! You should have an open folder in your extracted location. 2 things may happen here: You will get the extracted folder with the other documents inside. Congrats, you're done! If you have an extracted folder with ONLY the .exe file in it, go back into the zip file and drag the other files into the folder. This should fix the problem, all files from the zip need to be there to work.

(OPTIONAL) you CAN use Vortex mod manager to manage your bg3 mods on there, in which case any nexusmods mod will have a direct download button for you. Personally I have my subnautica mods loaded from there so bg3 is unavailable.

HOW TO MOD BALDURS GATE 6 IN EASY STEPS + SCRIPT EXTENDER

Make sure you have Baldur's Gate 3 Installed. I have it on steam, I don't know how to help with EA, sorry.

open your file explorer/documents. Go to Admin -> AppData -> Local -> Larian Studios* -> Baldur's Gate 3 (leave launcher alone). Create a mods folder if you don't already have one, but one should have been created on your first bootup. DO NOT CLOSE THIS TAB. THIS TAB STAYS OPEN UNTIL YOU ARE DONE MODDING. * I also just search Larian Studios in Local Disc (C:) but that does take some time to load

Congrats, you're ready to mod! Now, most good mods will need something called the Baldur's Gate 3 Script Extender. You can find the download page here, and this time you're going to hit the green "code" button. Ignore everything else. Hit download zip

Extract the file again, but this time into Local Disc (C:) -> Program Files (86x) -> Steam -> Steamapps -> common -> Baldur's Gate 3 -> bin* ** * MAKE SURE to extract it to the bin folder. Some other mesh and texture mods use the data bin, so confusing them is bad. ** you CAN directly extract the folder to the bin, but I personally find it easier to extract the zip back into downloads, then open my other file explorer and click and drag the whole extracted file into the bin folder

The fun part begins! Go find some mods you like (nexusmods mostly, gamebanana MAY have some). Extract folder to your mods folder in larian studios -> baldur's gate 3 -> mods. ONLY DRAG THE .PCK FILE. YOU DO NOT NEED ANY OTHER FILES UNLESS THE MOD MAKER SAYS SO.

USING THE MOD LOADER: you are done with file explorers! Go ahead and boot up the bg3modmanager.exe file from earlier. Any INACTIVE MODS must be CLICKED AND DRAGGED over to the ACTIVE MODS side. If you don't see any mods, hit the blue circle refresh button. After that, hit the "export order to game" button right beside "export". If you see a green popup at the bottom, you are good to go!

All done! You are now on your modding journey! (if you have any outlying problems, my dms are open and there is a whole host of modders out there with answers!)

NOW TO THE FUN PART: MOD PACKS!

My own Game Optimizer Pack (basic): includes General Fixes (general bug fixes), Improved UI & Improved UI Assets (necessary for customization mods), and Mod Fixer (necessary for mods to work) *you CAN download all of these files individually from https://www.nexusmods.com but this is basically. a short version of that.

My own Game Optimizer Pack (deluxe): includes all previous mods as well as 5e Spells (spell fixer), Additional Backgrounds, Customizer Compendium, Show approval ratings in dialogue, Purchase camp clothes from merchants, Tav's hairpack

COMPANION MODS:

No Abs for companions/pcs

"oops all futas" (all female companions have penises, if you want like an all transfem run or something)

Customizable Origins (lets you customize if you play as an origin character)

Astarion:

Astarion Moles and blemishes mod

Vampire Ascendant (ability fixer mod)

TAV MODS:

Freckles and Moles as Tattoo replacers

Trip's Accessory Collection (has glasses & monacles)

Ophelia's Body Shop (top heavy/bottom heavy/chubby body alternatives)

Stronger Tav - Muscular Upper Body Mod

Top Surgery Scars

Alternate Top Surgery Scars mod for bodys 1 and 3

Strongfat body - humans and half orcs

Tav's Dadbod Mod

Softie Body - Tiefling 2

New Eye Colours and Blindess for all eyes

Transmasc Clothing options

Actually feminine and lore friendly dragonborn legs

Femme obese dragonborn body (no clothing options developed yet)

Chubby/thick/bbw body mods and clothes

Big gut dragonborn (male)

Female muscle mod

Less defined abs for male bodies

Game Enhancing Mods that I recommend! (if I have one marked starting spoiler! just. just download it and ad it just trust me dont look to far into it I promise it will be good. If I have one marked late spoiler! you can look at it and decide if you want it or later)

Faithful & Faithless - no mandatory choice of god

Mundane Blindfold (one eye cover)

No Romance Limit (polyamory mod)

highlight everything tooltip

Party Limit begone

No more spiders (all spider models replaced with dogs)

Ritual spells for rp fun

Colourblind friendly spell slots

Camp event notifications

Autosaver/Save timer (GET THIS IT SAVED MY LIFE SO MUCH)

Histories & Occupations - new backgrounds

Scratch colour variety (late spoiler!/not spoiler heavy)

Just Story (for those who just want the story. every enemy has 1 hp)

Wyll's Devil Form (starting spoiler!)

Eyes of the beholder (eye alts + scleras)

[renenene]

Author’s notes at the end :) first fanfic!! Yippee!!

I’m Sorry for You

4.2k words

The title is a song lyric from “ILYIS pt 2” by Mel Bryant & the Mercy Makers

Things I’d put if I ever posted to ao3 !!

Tags:

Many POC and LGBTQ+ headcanons among other things, quirk shenanigans, angst but not too bad ig, POV switching, Bakugo Katsuki swears a lot, Class 2-A, Sero speaks Spanish (yell at me if it’s wrong I’ll probably have my friend translating), Bakugo Katsuki likes to learn languages to fuck with Deku, Bakugo Katsuki natural talent frfr, PTSD for all, post war arc except I stopped watching after s5 and know everything mostly by fandom and friends ranting at me but I’m reading the manga currently, everybody lives/nobody dies, except AFO, we’re getting creative with the Bakugo nicknames, Bakugo in therapy, dekusquad are the real menaces, hero internships, the new class 1-A maybe, smoking weed/weed mentions, panic attacks, dissociation, let Deku stop being an innocent baby, let Deku be a teenager, let Katsuki be a dork, I believe in class 2-A having lives and real trauma responses ☝️

Characters:

Class 2-A, Katsuki Bakugo, Izuku Midoriya, Mina Ashido, Eijiro Kirishima, Sero Hanta, Shouto Todoroki, Himiko Toga, Cammie, original OCs probably as background characters idk

Relationships:

Midoriya Izuku/Bakugo Katsuki, past Midoriya Izuku/Ochako Uraraka, background Mina Ashido/Cammie subplot, Ochako Uraraka/Himiko Toga subplot, minor Mirko/Shigaraki, minor Sero Hanta/Todoroki Shouto subplot, Platonic Ochako Uraraka/Katsuki Bakugo, minor Kyoka Jiro/Yaoyorozu Momo subplot

Blurb ig??

Katsuki Bakugo has cheated death nearly three times at this point. Sludge incident, Kamino incident, the goddamn war. He doesn’t gamble with his life or anything. Villains just seem to love him. If it were up to Katsuki, his life would never be played with.

That's gonna change real quick, though. You’d be crazy to think he’ll accept that after so much goddamn struggle in so little time, it’s Izuku’s ass that’s the only thing pumping his heart. Katsuki is cool with Izuku. He even trusts him. Still, if Katsuki can’t control anything, he needs to at least be able to control his own self.

Yeah, Katsuki’ll cheat death again. Fourth time’s the charm.

Chapter 1 ——————————————

4:48 AM, Friday / Katsuki Bakugo

The sun isn’t up yet, thank God. There’ll be no first year, dumbfuck extras to ogle me on my morning run. I can enjoy my quiet peace — even if the weather is getting a bit too cold for my liking.

Already, I’ve got a tracksuit on in seconds and I’m making record time. If I can get my hair down without problems, then I might be able to sneak some time at the gym. All that’s left is to fix my hair.

My drawer comes open with a roll. My hair clips are usually at the forefront. Usually. I put them at the front every night. I damn sure know where I put my shit.

.

..

…

Where the fuck are my clips?

8:21 AM / Izuku Midoriya

The days were long. The days were hard. And this day in particular was filled with— BOOM! There’s that same crackling noise everyone is all too familiar with by now. You’d think things would change after a year.

But no.

This is worse than usual.

Much, much worse.

Whoops and cheers arise, shouting “Go! Go! Catch ‘im!” A chopping hand makes its best attempt at distracting the instigating crowd, but only succeeds for half a second before the eyes are glued back onto the affair like a brand new fridge magnet.

“Encouraging violent behavior is not heroic cond— Bakugo-San!” Our beloved but prickly class president yelps as an almost impressively minute AP shot goes whizzing over his perfectly styled head. “No quirks in the classroom!”

“It ain’t a classroom until hygenically-challenged-Sensei gets here!” Kacchan sneers his usual sneer as he readies his hand to flick. “Until that infestation of a man wiggles his way in this room, this place is my battlefield. And just like the war— I ain’t losin’!”

“Badmouthing our sensei after he—“

“Take a joke, glasses,” Kaminari leans into the stickler’s side, purring. “Kacchan respects Aizawa-Sensei probably the most out of all of— FUCK!!”

“Language!”

Kacchan’s hand sizzles just the slightest bit from recoil from the shot that narrowly missed Kaminari’s ear. “That’s for making me sound all soft.”

“Kacchan, he was defending y—“

“You better pray there’s someone to defend your ass.” The blond swivels around with the quickness of a top-of-his-class war veteran, which he is, but no one would say to his face lest his head get somehow even bigger.

I gulp. This commotion has been going on all morning. Everyone knows Kacchan isn’t really going to hurt anyone but… he looks like he’s fighting urges.

Sero sits up ever so slowly. His eyes are bloodshot like he’s done a pretty amount of weed before classes, and he probably has. For God’s sake, it’s barely eight in the morning. UA is definitely a stressful place to be, but soon-to-be heroes shouldn’t be doing drugs.

Another small AP shot sounds, and I glow the slightest bit green to dodge it, landing star-shaped like a startled cat in the upper right corner of the back of the mangled classroom. The place looks like a tornado tore through it with the way the desks are all skewed. Some were moved so my classmates could watch the entertainment, chewing on snide comments and muffled giggles as toppings to Yaomomo’s popcorn. It’s like a tiny gladiator fight is going on, and the lion has eaten my sword.

A gladiator fight that Kacchan still won’t win. It’s only because he’s not able to go one hundred percent with this whack a mole stuff ‘cause he’ll mess up the room. However, fucking around is the only way he’ll ever find out how to land a hit on me.

“What did he even do?” Sero drawls, pointing his exasperation at a snarling Kacchan, palms popping with learned restraint. And oh, that restraint is going through a popping pop quiz of a test right now.

He has no clips in his hair. As of late, he had his hair clipped down over his eye like some 2000s emo, minus the scene extensions.

“I don’t have to tell a shitty extra jack shit,” he growls out, a menacing smile turning menacing scowl. It was an expected reaction, really. He always bristles when people get all in his business. And yet, class 2-A is nothing if not always in all his business, if you couldn’t tell by even the most outwardly innocent and responsible eyes being on the commotion as well.

Sero stalks closer with a yawn, a few paces behind him. He's not a step in front, still, out of habit I suppose. Kacchan has eased up a lot with the war. War seems to mature people, everyone here, really. But during his moments of irrational rage, his little aspects of tyranny bubble up like a bad reaction. The reaction he gives Sero, a fast side eye, seems like that sort of steaming an almost boiling pot of water will do before it erupts, leaking water into the ready and waiting flame beneath it.

“You don’t have to tell me ‘jack shit’, sure.” Sero shrugs, most likely unaware that his life is in jeopardy because of the weed in his system. An angry Kacchan is a prickly Kacchan. As much as Sero needs to diffuse the situation for his poor, poor beauty sleep before class, he also shouldn’t want to be put to rest for good. I personally want all my friends graduating without any tombstones for us to plant. “But,” Sero continues, drawling again just so Kacchan can at least focus his annoyance away from me and towards Sero, “we always figure out what dumbass—“

“Language,” Iida peeps out, a low volume I didn’t know his voice was capable of reaching.

“—what stupid thing you fight Midoriya for. Eventually, anyway. So just speed the process already.”

A slow hand turns to aim, palm up and popping, right at his temple.

“‘You tryna call me a dumbass?”

“Lang—“

From the corner of my eye, I catch a mesmerized Uraraka pat Iida for him to lean back. A calm, or at least calm looking Kacchan, is the worst Kacchan of them all.

Over the years there were grumpy Kacchan’s, raging Kacchan’s, stressed Kacchan’s, exhausted Kacchan’s, Kacchan’s in denial— when was he not?— and right now, a calm, almost crazed Kacchan. Of all the Kacchan’s our class seemed to learn how to wiggle our way into the graces of tolerance he had stowed beyond a seemingly less and less penetrable fortress as the days blended, calm Kacchan’s grace looked to lie in another plane of existence.

For, this is a Kacchan that smiled. Easy and small and uncanny. He may make many threats, but it’s been years since he’s looked so genuinely murderous.

“What I’m tryna do is keep you from getting detention for the third time this month. You’re on a weekly basis at this point.”

It’s almost a relief to see Kacchan stop smiling, but that threatening hand moves not one inch down.

“Who told you to care? Hah? Is your name glasses now? Or ponytail? Nah, you’re tape face. So stay in your lane and quit worryin’, jackass.” The two others in question bristle at their mention, but otherwise make no other reaction. Sero’s reaction, however, is to raise a brow.

“So they’re allowed to worry?”

“No, you— what!?— They’re not allowed to worry,” he grits out. “It’s what they do, and it’s what you don’t.”

This is when Mina pipes up, chief instigator of the onlookers. “Mido-Chan—“ she points frantically to the door— “is gone!”

Her impish grin almost grows past her cheeks at the same time that Kacchan’s explosions pop dangerously close to Sero’s face.

Luckily, that’s when Aizawa-Sensei literally rolls in and suddenly the desks are put together by the time he’s upright. Noticeably still in that horrendous banana yellow caterpillar sack, but upright nonetheless.

“Will someone tell me why Midoriya-San was full cowling down the hall?” He drones, already too done to even fathom the possible answers.

A hand shoots up, and it’s no surprise that it’s Iida’s.

“Bakugo-San and Midoriya were having a bit of a scuffle—“

“Again?” He interrupts, just annoyed at the common occurrence at this point.

“Yes, sensei.”

“That’s the third time this month.” Kacchan sucks his teeth at the remark. “Earphone Jack, Creati.” The bloodshot, dried eyes of the insomniac glance between the two in question. “You both work well together. Find the problem child before the bell rings. If you can do that, I’ll give an extra 5 credits to your participation grade for today. However, lost time won’t be made up. Rendezvous with your friends. Heroes don’t have time to ‘make up’ their missions.”

Yaomomo is the first to raise her hand, face scrunched in objection. “Sensei—“

“Unfortunately for whatever you have to say, heroes are not able to decline calls to action if they’re able, either. Imagine a mother’s child dying because you dawdled.”

Him and finding the oddest times to give some strangely amazing advice. He’s not wrong, but he’s definitely twisting the system so he doesn’t have to go searching himself. The man is on a prosthetic leg though.

It’s not until thirty minutes later the three of us return, heaving a stick, leaf, and splinter ladled me by my shoulders.

“S-sorry, sensei.” I bow my head, nervously smiling. By the quiver of my lip, any other person might’ve thought I was about to laugh. But this is class 2-A. They know I’m on the verge of tears with anxiety.

Aizawa-Sensei does nothing but pinch his nose bridge and groan. “Just sit.”

And this class begins, Bakugo sending the occasional calculated glance at Midoriya.

12:13 PM / Katsuki Bakugo

“Dude! You freaked! I mean— more than usual! Like— this was going crazy! It was entertaining as hell—“

“You almost got your ear exploded off,” Sero interrupts the honey haired boy with a small snicker.

“You did too! And well, yeah, that wasn’t entertaining.” He deflates at the memory but perks right up when he gets back to storytelling. Y’know, as if they were not literally there.

Kaminari blabbers on and on, throwing in the odd joke or two about how Izuku slipped away like the fucking Pink Panther with the way he tip toed. Like I was one of those red light laser systems, poised to go off at any moment if you only breathed in the wrong way.

Of course I fucking would. That asshole knows what he’s got comin’, going through my shit. He shouldn’t be so damn surprised I was ready to leave him in tatters. I would disintegrate him with my eyes if I could. The ones that were currently downcast and staring into nothing.

Kirishima leans forward a little from his side of the lunch table, across from me, to tap the space in my view. It’s one quick tap. He knows it’ll get my attention ‘cause I hate it when people do it. It’s as if they’re treating me like a dog, tapping in front of me. Makes me wanna bite their finger off and show them a real bitch. Still, the tap is light enough that the others continue to be too deep in gossip land to notice whatever we’re about to say.

“You good?”

My airhead expression falls right back into a scowl.

“I’m as good as someone with detention can be.” I’d punch his highlighter head if I didn’t like him so much. Tolerated him more than others, at least.

“How long’s it this time?”

“An hour after school. ‘Said I gotta watch Eri ‘cause he knows I hate it.”

“What else?”

I narrow my eyes, leaning closer to Kirishima. “What’s it to you?” The fucker doesn’t pry, thank God. Why’s he doing it now?

“I’m worried.” He shrugs as if it’s normal. “You keep getting in detention.”

My narrowed eyes go to slits by the time I'm finished blinking. “Yeah, well, it’s my business if I do. Not any of yours.”

He only folds his arms and leans back, scoffing. “It’s plenty my business, dear ol’ Kats—“

“Quit calling me that, Jaws,” I grit out. He knows I hate that dumbass nickname. For one—it’s way too cutesy for my liking. ‘Kats’. I don’t have fucking paws. I am not a cat. And if I were, I’d scratch your face and vomit on you before you can say “Kah”.

Nonetheless, he continues. “You’re my friend. I don’t surround myself with people who aren’t manly, and people who aren’t manly go to detention.”

“‘You callin’ me a loser?”

“I didn’t say that.”

“People who aren’t manly are losers to you, stoplight. I ask again: ‘You callin’ me a loser?”

“The point is stop going to detention.” I roll my eyes. Okay, so he’s calling me a loser. Maybe going to detention isn’t very cool.

“And I don’t mean skipping, just in case you get ideas— even though I know you wouldn’t,” he says, for no reason, might I add. I wouldn’t skip classes unless there was a literal life threatening situation.

“Now, here’s your cookie.” He stuffs a spicy, sweet wafer in my mouth, watching with content as I shift from getting ready to blow his head off to being pacified by the combo of flavors.

Todoroki whisks by at that convenient moment, holding a book open. He looks so similar to Izuku, furiously taking notes once he sees even the slightest noteworthy thing. He’s even got his tongue stuck out to the side as Izuku usually does. Speaking of, what the hell noteworthy thing am I doing right now? “That cookie looks good.” And there goes my answer.

“The recipe’s homemade!” Kirishima chimes.

“Ooh, Kiri, can I have one?” Sero’s practically eating one with his eyes. “Just one nibble or something?”

Mina’s next in line to whine. “Yeah, c’mon, don’t hog!”

“Okay, okay!”

The mention of food has officially brought the other oafs into our conversation. He passes a cookie around to everyone, halting at Kaminari, who seriously cannot take spicy shit at all.

“Why can’t you ever make something normal?”

I lick the crumbs off my fingers, noticing Kirishima grin hard enough for his big cheeks to hurt. Yeah, the cookies are good. Whatever.

“Why can’t you grow some balls, dunceface?”

The others snicker, all except Todoroki.

“But doesn’t Kaminari already have—“

“Nevermind!” Mina pipes up before he can ruin a good joke.

I snag another wafer-cookie whatever the fuck and look up at Mr. Pill. “What’re you doing here anyway?”

“I’m taking notes on that cookie. You mentioned there was a recipe, Kirishima.”

He nods.

Todoroki blinks once. Twice. “Can I have it?”

“You bake!?” Sero bursts, lips pulled in a wide smile. He’s too enamored to realize he’d completely overshadowed Ei and the fact that he was supposed to answer.

“I didn’t know Todo-Chan baked!” Pinky’s hands smack on the table to prop herself up in all her excitement. “You and Sato-Chan should totally bake together sometime. It’d be a flavor party!”

“I thought you’d like bland stuff.” Kaminari is surprisingly less energy filled than the others, instead just curious.

“Baking’s super manly, man!” Kirishima shouts.

Todoroki just shrugs at all their enthusiasm.

“My friends like sweets, so I learned.”

“Well, this ain’t sweet.” I take a large chomp from another cookie. “‘S spishee,” I growl through the mush in my mouth.

“My friends like spice as well.”

That makes all of us raise our brows. Todoroki’s friends like spice? As in— Iida, who’s a stickler for just a chip as opposed to something with “nutritional value”? Midoriya who’s eyes water after “too much” ketchup? Uraraka who… to be honest, she can handle her spice, but can’t take a taki. She’s probably at “spicy” Doritos level.

Sero hooks an arm around Todoroki’s shoulders and grins, small and sly. “Ah, I get it. We’re your friends.” The oh’s on Mina and Kaminari’s face are almost immediate.

“I never said I was peppermint’s friend.” I grumble. The dumbasses continue with their cooing and I continue emptying Kirishima’s container.

“You wanna make cookies for us, Todo?” Mina purrs, cozying up to the boy’s other side. Her eyes bat all coaxing-like.

“No,” he glances down at her, and it takes her a second to realize he’s not being smart with her. Just being as socially inept as he usually is. “You guys are my friends, but they’re not for you.”

“Oh.” Sero and Mina glance between each other, but Kirishima’s the first to ask the big question.

“Who’re you makin’ ‘em for?”

“I can’t tell you.”

“Can’t tell?” Dunceface and Elbows ask in unison.

“I can’t tell.”

“Sometimes I just wanna mangle your stupid, inexpressive mug— the shitheads wanna know why, you dumbass,” I grumble.

The dumbass in question blinks, and nods. “I can’t tell.” We all collectively groan. “I can’t.” And the boy shrugs.

“You can’t tell us why you want a spicy cookie recipe and you can’t tell us why you can’t tell us you…” Kaminari freezes, brows pinched. “What was I saying again, Kiri? I-I was definitely saying something— I know it made sense.”

“Mhm.” The redhead snickers at his best friend—but I’m really the best friend ‘cause I’m the best in everything—and replies in kind. “He can’t tell us why he wants the cookie recipe, or why he can’t tell us why he can’t tell us he needs the recipe.”

Kaminari’s eyes are wide as he hugs his own sides, so Sero offers him a pat on the back as consolation. I guess I'd pat him too, if I only I hadn’t turned my hearing aids down. Yeah, hearing aids. Setting off explosions only a few feet from your ears since the age of four does that to you.

“You’re correct, Kirishima. Now, the recipe? Please.”

He nods with the widest smile. “I can text it to you before the day ends. Probably before training with All Might.”

“Anytime before Saturday is a good time.”

Saturday? I perk up. I’m allowed to be fucking nosy. “What’s happenin’ Saturday?”

“Uh…” Uh? Since when was Todoroki capable of saying uh? “I wanna buy the products as soon as possible. For my friend.”

I freeze, eyes narrowing at my Tupperware. It was then that we’d all had the same thought, but Mina was the first to voice it. “Frien—“ Sero’s tape shoots to cover her mouth at a practiced speed. “Mm!! Mm, hm!?” She squeals, and he shakes his head with an eerily serious grimace.

“If you’ll text me the recipe, then I don’t have a reason to be here anymore.” Todoroki bows at a right angle. “Please excuse my interr—“ is that a blush on his goddamn ears?

Kirishima’s the one who covers Kaminari’s mouth when he almost makes the mistake of commenting on it.

Half n’ half stalks away, cradling that book of secrets. Just when he’s out of earshot— “America has a problem.” I lean in, narrowing my eyes at each of my tolerable twits.

Mina, Sero, Kirishima, and Kaminari are sat back down and huddled in, already ready to conspire.

“No shit he does. Look at the way he walked off. Like that book was treasure!” Sero whisper-shouts, throwing his hands around.

“I didn’t even know Todo-Chan was capable of blushing!”

Kirishima shushes Mina for being a bit too loud, then ducks right back into our little circle. “Bakugo and Sero are right though. He was totally suspicious. I mean, yeah, we’re all Uber closer now after the…”

“You know,” Kaminari murmurs.

“Yeah, that.” Kirishima takes a shuddering breath at the memories. Bloody and grave. “Anywho, yeah, we’re close. But no one just walks up with a notebook for a reason as small as spicy cookies. I didn’t even tell anybody I made them.” He folds his arms and scoffs. “It’s like the guy knew or something. He couldn’t have had a notebook ready that damn fast.”

“He couldn’t have. But a freckled fuck I know keeps at least one paper and pen on deck at all times.” I pointedly glance behind myself, and their eyes follow that glance. The… “dekusquad”—God, do I hate that that’s what we’re calling them now—don’t look suspicious though. “Shitty de—zuku is in on it,” I interrupt myself midway through the nickname Izuku has told me multiple times he doesn’t mind.

“And did you see the way he seemed almost more interested when you said they were spicy? Who here even likes spicy cookies over regular cookies!?” Kaminari sounds like he’s straining to keep his voice under a hearing level.

Of course that’s the part Kaminari zeroes in on. It is a detail to point out, but not that big. Sero shrugs.

“They were good, but not better than a regular cookie, Ei. No offense.” Mina smiles up at him.

“Whatever, I made them only to satisfy Kats’ hell-hot buds anyway.”

“Which they are.” He blinks a few times, eyes ripped to my deadpan. “Satisfied.”

“Thanks?”

“Ain’t nothing’ to thank. They were good.”

“Kats—“

“Simple as that.”

RING!!

��Shit, the bell!” Kaminari’s packing his unfinished lunch at lightning speed.

“I’ll feel so bad if I have to see that hollow shell of a man looking any more depressing if we’re late to his training,” Sero grumbles as he grabs his belongings with his tape.

“Well don’t remind me!” Mina wails.

Kirishima’s laughing under his breath as he pulls his bag on. “I don’t think All Might will get depressed if you guys are a little late. It’s not manly, yeah, but it’s not world ending.”

The others can scramble to class all they want. I’ve got a plan for the green team. They wanna send spies on me? Jokes on them, I’ve been watched all my goddamn life.

“Whatchu want?” Kirishima squints at me, only teasing. I fold my arms and lean my hip into the edge of the table.

“Shut up and I’ll tell you. You, me, after school.”

“Session?”

What the hell? “No— Fuck, no. Not fuckin’ weed, Ei.”

He only shrugs. “It could’ve been weed. It sounded like weed. It should’ve been weed.”

Why the hell would I want weed?

“No. No, it shouldn’t have. Nevermind—I mean, we need to talk. I got somethin’, and I need ya’ to go along with it.”

“‘You have a plan?”

“Yeah.”

The asshole looks at me. Scrutinizing as if it’s impossible for the top of our fucking class to come up with a plan so fast. I can imagine everywhere he’s looking. The knick in my brow from the war, the worry line just barely coming to shape on my forehead. Basically, every part of me that’s only formed ‘cause of that damn war. I’d rather drop dead than let him think I’m weak.

“Why were you chasing Midoriya—“

“I don’t wanna talk about it.”

“Kats—“

“I told you to knock that—“

“Why not? To the name and… this morning. I thought it was just ‘cause Mina and the others were around that you wouldn’t tell.”

He knows he’s prying, and yet he’s testing me anyway. Regardless of Mina’s big gossipy mouth, I wouldn’t tell a soul. It’s not their business.

“I told you I’m not talking about it, and the extras weren’t the reason why. Plus, that name is fucking ugly by the way.”

“We made it for you though.” He grins.

“‘Don’t mean it don’t suck.” I nudge my head towards the exit, where the bulk of our year is off to. “C’mon, before my perfect no lateness record blows up.”

Kirishima kicks into a jog but raises his brow at me anyway. “But we’re still not done talking. You still haven’t told me—“

“Okay, Johnny Bravo, if I gotta tell you—“

“Who the fuck is Johnny Bravo?”

“—that one buff guy? Y’know, that one show about the guy who’s all macho and has gigantic man tits— nevermind, stop interrupting!” I can feel sparks starting in my palms and he’s not making it any better. “As I was saying, I ain’t tellin’ you nothin’! It’s me and shitnerd’s business. Not yours, not Soyface’s, and not anybody else’s. Got it?”

He mimics catching a ball, dropping it ever so slowly on the floor, and pouting up at me. I swear I’ll kill him one day.

“One day they’ll be sending your ass back to Fatgum. ‘Cause I’ll beat you so bad your quirk will be unusable.”

“Kats, your plays on words are getting too many steps—“

“‘Wasn’t even a play on words, but I’ll give you a more pea-brained threat: I’ll eat you.”

“Hell yeah! Love who you love. I mean, don’t love me though.”

I sigh. My friends are so… stupid.

Most of our class is already huddled around the symbol of peace by the time we arrive. All Might still insists on showing up in his buff form until he starts choking blood, even though no one needs or wants him to. Though, it’s not like anyone wants to crush his spirit by saying anything about it.

“I am here, my students!” the man bellows, as if we don’t have eyes.

Kaminari hails him, before Iida jabs his sharp as hell elbow in the blond's side.

Our training begins.

——————————————————

A/N TIME !!!

Hope anyone who read this enjoyed :) This A/N is long ash tho, can y’all tell I’m a yapper

Anywho, finally posting the fanfic I’ve been working on 😭 literally only 2 chapters and the beginning of a 3rd in because I have such a bad habit of forgetting things I started, remembering, forgetting, not liking, and repeating the cycle. I got really inspired reading The Way You Used to Do planning this out though. Read it last year and my friends haven’t heard silence since.

If I don’t think this is ass by the time I finish I might post to ao3 as well (probably in like 10 yrs LOL idk how fanfic writers can consistently write chapters and finish with 200k words in like 4 months) this is basically my form of beta-ing when my bsf isn’t available lol

Also, I’ve kinda just been writing in a google doc without a title because it was originally an “x reader” but then the plot I planned got too interesting 🤷🏾‍♀️ I think “I’m Sorry for You” fits the narrative I’ve built though. If anyone wants to know why, id be happy to explain ^^ Anywho, I always think those existential “the stars r ur eyes” or whatever titles were so pretty and I wanted to have something like that but my brain always blanks out when I have to think of a title. Womp womp.

If anyone is interested, I also have a doc for planning, with character headcanons and analyses. I have a visceral hatred for OOC works and while most will say that it is so, they can just be so far from source material that I’ll die reading it. In addition, I made a little playlist to help me brainstorm plot and think about bakudeku dynamics.

[maris-library-of-love]

Oh!

Welcome to my blog! My name is Mari!! (^^)/

I think I'll mostly just be reblogging stuff, but I may also post a few things! ^^

That being said, have a wonderful time and enjoy your stay! ><

By the way, I also tend to overuse this emoticon a lot -> ^^

Ah, riiiight... the actual information... ^^;

My name is Mari! I am 19! And I am a fictive of Mari from OMORI!! <3

Our main blog is @n3hmof1sh so feel free to check that out!

My tag is ☂️ by the way ^^

I use She/Her and He/Him pronouns!! :>

I think that's everything? Oh! I do possibly have ADHD and Autism!! If that's worth mentioning... I'm pretty sure Im either Bisexual or Straight? Heh.. sorry, I'm still questioning... But I am a transfem woman!! >:o

Also, no anti-endos here! Nor anti-willos! Im pro-endo and pro-willo, along with the fact that we may possibly be endo...

Feel free to ask me anything if you'd like!!

I don't really have a "Do Not Interact" to be honest... If you're bringing bad vibes here, then you get blocked!! >:o

My tags are currently,

#☂️ posting

#☂️ reblogs

#☂️ answers

#not ☂️!!

#Hero.... ♡

#My friends!! :D

#☂️ favourites!

Userbox made by @/just-another-userbox-maker

I'll find the credits for these two boxes soon... ^^;

[deathberi]

haha i stopped making gifs some years ago but i still have the gif maker mindset and have to get them out of my head so im glad you are open to suggestions ✨

I got one more for ya, I was reminded today of the dialogue in remake where tifa asks cloud how he knows aerith (it's if you go to tifa instead of aerith in the sewer after don corneo's) and he's like "i saved her, she saved me, round and round it goes" nice little dialogue moment about their relationship. could be a bigger gifset with relevant instances of said saving but also is just a nice on its own

stopped??? whyyy omg why dont you join me in filling our tag!! 😠

haha please we (do you?) i love a savage choosing outcome 😂 like how consistent that theres always aerith content outside of favoring her 😂 but no no i cant possibly do the simple version im not keen on putting 🍵’s mug up close if its not a bigger party set 😂 the bigger version it is for me however im still on a bad case of i cant find my remake clips on my drives with me so theyre most probably left on my pc thats in a different place ;_;

[mintys-musings]

i need more of ur anzu x idol rambles PLZ theyre so good if i cld inject it to my brain i wld do so /pos

*cracks knuckles* how much time do we have? I could do this all damn day t b h.

okay here's a random thing i love about anzu- not entirely related to this but still: EVERYONE KNOWS CANONICALLY HOW DAMN THIRSTY SHE IS TO SEE GUYS WHO ARE BARELY CLOTHED WITH MUSCLES. slight spoilers for madara's fs1 story will be in the tags so tread lightly if you wanna experience that yourself. just- she has a clear type in men. at least as far as physicality goes.

and for women??? SUZU. ARASHI. SHE LOVES HEADSTRONG WOMEN WHO TAKE NO SHIT.

ANYWAY SHIPS

This is gonna get long so im putting it under cut- im doing this right before i go to bed bc my brain will not rest until i get this out of my system

Okay. I know which ships I'll end up rambling about on my own. So lemme highlight ones that i may not talk about as much but love still. idk if u wanted to hear horny rambles or not so im just throwing in first time stuff as flavour.

MakoAnzu

MAKOTO AND ANZU ARE THE CUTEST. EPIC GAMER LOSER BF AND GIRLBOSS/GIRLFAIL GF COMBO. idk if it makes sense but they're like. hs sweethearts that never actually got together in hs and only realized it later when they reconnect or something that they're so totally in love. also he's just so damn goofy it balances out her more serious side that took over after her failed rebellion attempt at kimisaki. like he'd start calling her his favourite trouble maker if he heard that story. OOOOUUU MAYBE HE'D EVEN START CALLING HER ANGIE AND SHE NEARLY CRIES BC NO ONE CALLS HER THAT ANYMORE BESIDES HER BROTHER. idk they're sweet.

the first time they do it together, they're both so awkward that it's funny but they're so comfy with each other that it isn't a problem. in my mind, mako tries to lead at first but when it gets too hot and heavy, anzu takes charge. they seem like the most realistic couple out there with the least amount of angst~

JunAnzu

okay now to talk about Makoto's gaming buddy with her instead HFDSF. i feel like this anzu ship is a lil underrated. i personally love it. he has canonically given in to her like 🥺 face. they're relationship is basically jun teasing her and anzu pouting until he feels bad and it's cute. moon and sun vibe. also. jun is in eden/eve. he has money he's not spendin on himself. he may not give the most lavish gifts or even the most gifts in terms of anzu ships, but he does buy her little trinkets and stuff. more often than not though he's just paying for her meals. even with gatekeeper cash and the anzu fund made in the graduation story, he's not letting her spend a cent if she doesn't have to. if questioned he'd just be like "Haaah? Ain't it rude to make the lady pay?" but in reality he just wants to spoil her. the entirety of trickstar is gonna start questioning her though if they notice they're getting close. And i bet ibara is going to investigate why half of eve is meddling with the competition's producer.

their first time is spontaneous. they never talked before hand about it or whatever. it probably was them destressing from a hard day at work. PERSONALLY- i think they did it in the ES gym~ and god anzu was so scared theyd get caught. BOTH of them know Ibara goes down to the gym after work but luckily a meeting ran long or something because by the time they were done and dressed, they could just pass it off as training when ibara walked in.

HiMEAnzu

okay this is definitely a rare one- but a ship ive grown fond of the more i thought about it. meru and anzu are both work oriented, but still a little silly deep down. so when they relax and get to know each other, they find the others presence so calming. he admires her for her work ethic and she does the same. god im pulling out the first idol story interactions with this one as well- he let his guard down near completely when they first meet. and he says something like "like attracts like" or something like they're kindred spirits and that he's fallen for her. that last part was probs just his attempt at joking fanservice, but he is aware that he could easily pull anyone he wants to. for anzu to just talk normally with him, he thinks it's refreshing and honestly- being in a unit like crazyb, he would want someone calm like her to be around.

here's the big catch though: meru would never risk kaname's idol image by dating ANYONE. let alone the person known as "everyones producer." so this ship is BUILT for "at arms length" pining/"we'll never know what could've been" angst

their first time is the most planned out of all three of these ships. not on anzu's side, but himerus. meru is really meticulous with his image and he respects anzu. so if he's going to do something with her, he's going to do it right and make sure they have the most privacy possible. it's def something that happens after a VERY romantic date. possibly an anniversary. he gets incredibly intimate. maybe he'd even start talking in first person. this is, after all, not a performance for anyone. he just wants to share this moment with anzu. that being said they go on for a long ass time because meru has stamina and anzu can get insatiable if teased long enough.

[warriorteam1924]

J'ai publié 873 fois en 2022 => posted 873 times (so far   ^^)

65 billets créés (7%) => 65 created posts. that’s not a lot i know.... 

808 billets reblogués (93%) => 808 reblogs hey not bad 

Les blogs que j'ai le plus reblogués :

@eileen-crys

@painandpleasure86

@julescape

@deakys-chesthair

@beydeaks​

=> that’s because they are my lovelies 

J'ai étiqueté 873 billets en 2022 => tags ahah 

#warriorteam1924 reblogs - 794 billets

#dont shun it queue it - 759 billets

#queen - 682 billets

#john deacon - 444 billets

#freddie mercury - 312 billets

#brian may - 216 billets

#roger taylor - 216 billets

#veronica tetzlaff - 90 billets

#johnica - 85 billets

#joe mazzello - 81 billets

Tag le plus long : 102 caractères

#forgive my lack of inspiration and my lack of time but eh 2 edits and 2 fics isnt that bad ahahaha lol

=> lol that is so lame ^^”

Mes billets vedette en 2022 : top 5 posts in 2022

n°5

Sooo i did something 💖💜

77 notes - publié le 23 août 2022

n°4

Write your letters in the sand

Ben Hardy x Reader

Author’s note : Hi my beauties. Here we are for a lil something for  the amazing Ben Hardy’s Birthday. It’s dedicated to a special someone to me, but feel free to read it if you want to. I hope you enjoy it. Thanks in advance for the feedback. Also, I remind you English is not my mother tongue, sorry for the mistakes….

Warnings : None, I guess it’s okay

Summary : Another Birthday with Ben....

Words count : 1,661words

Permanent tag list : @reavenedges-lies @thosequeenboys @born-to-lose @orionis8689 @queenlover05​

 The weather was incredibly and surprisingly mild for the season. Even if it was still winter, you frowned as you noticed you didn’t need a scarf or your hat to get out. Even the dogs seemed to be happy to be able to go in the garden freely, not having to put their coats on.

Voir l'intégralité du billet <= to see the post 

78 notes - publié le 2 janvier 2022

n°3

J’ai deux amours....

Ben Hardy X FemReader

Author’s note : Hi my beauties. This piece is very special because it was actually a request…. It took me quite some time, but i do hope the person who requested will like it. Well,  I hope you all enjoy it. Thanks in advance for the feedback. Also, I remind you English is not my mother tongue, sorry for the mistakes….

@/anon who requested : I hope you like it…. Sorry it took some time to write this one. I know the plot is not Ben actually dating a french gal, but this is how inspiration came. 

Request from anon : Hey ! I saw that you wrote an imagine about ben dating a brazilian girl, could you write one about him dating a french girl ?

Warnings : none I think, some parts are in french, but it’s not too hard

Summary : Ben visiting France.... 

Words count : 3,280 words

Permanent tag list : @reavenedges-lies​ ​ @thosequeenboys​ @born-to-lose​ @orionis8689​ @queenlover05​ (please feel free to let me know it’s now useless to tag you, i wouldn’t want anyone to feel like they have to read anything i might be posting)

It was a special day for you. At last, you had been able to get back to Paris again, to visit your favorite museum, The Louvres. The place was huge, with so many different pieces of art, so many departments, but also so many tourists and visitors.

Voir l'intégralité du billet <= see the whole post here 

86 notes - publié le 4 avril 2022

n°2

Ethereal.... Colorized by me 💖💜

=> oh yes this one has been my phone wallpaper for quite some time, so beautiful ^^ 

89 notes - publié le 2 mai 2022 

Mon billet n°1 en 2022

Voir l'intégralité du billet

106 notes - publié le 6 février 2022 

=> when i think some gifs makers get thousands of notes. that’s a shame cause i don’t think mine are so bad honestly.....

well it’s been a busy year, but i’ve tried to create a bit. my top 5 isn’t that bad, even if the First one hardly gets over 100 notes. 

I’m probs gonna repeat myself, but folks, stop asking for reblogs and support if you don’t do it yourself. I think my rates are not fair regarding the way i reblog a full load of stuff. and im full busy, so that’s not an excuse. just move your ass and do it, or else you just shut up about your own creations. 

I’m not going to carry on cause people will think i’m not enjoying being here anylonger, which isn’t the case. I love the queen/borhaps fandom. I have the tendency not to understand people and the way they behave. that’s all

Take care everyone and thanks to all of you who keep on supporting me, like when you reblog stuff, and not only new stuff or stuff you only see passing in front of your nose. again, it’s not that hard ^^ 

love you all  💖💜

[cherry-casino]

1! quite a few, actually. therian, copinglink, fictionkin, fictionhearted, fictionheir (do those count?), and a possible kin (not sure if its kin or therian yet)

2! (in no specific order)

brown tabby american shorthair cat (therian)

orange tabby norwegian forest cat (therian)

white lily cookie (fictionkin)

angel (copinglink)

the list of fictionheirs is far too long, but the main ones are tails and affogato cookie (weird combo, ik)

possible snow leopard kin/therian

3! i get shifts quite often! not like, lots, but a decent amount. my main shifts are sensory shifts and phantom shifts, but mental shifts arent that uncommon for me either :)

an i think the weirdest cameo shift ive ever had was this one weird (and rare for me) dream shift. which is already weird considering i hardly dream, much less dream shift, but i was a lizard. just some. random garden lizard. like the ones you see outside on the playground. idk what i was doing

4! the wording of this is. kinda hard for me to wrap my head around. but uh. i guess one of the things ive done is ive decorated bits of my room to correspond with my alterhumanity! ive got a little feather on a string i hung near my bed, and i have this vase of fake lilies :) stuff like that to remind me of who i am! i also tend to go and interact with the other cats we have quite often. just uh. the little things.

5! my outlook on the community changes depending on what PART of the community we're talking about.

like i think the tumblr therian community is pretty good. probably one of the best ive seen so far.

tiktok is horrid. but not everyone there sucks. ive noticed that a lot of the therians/other alterhumans there just find themselves misinformed, or led down the wrong paths. with a bit of enlightenment i think it could be fixed.

youtube is decent imo. theres a lot of misinformation there as well, but if you can find the right creators with the right mindsets, you can find a safe place. also a lot of the quadrobists and mask makers on there are super sweet!!!

twitter. i have no comment. i dont fw twitter i dont touch twitter everrrrrr nuhuh.

discord is pretty good as well tho!!!! ive found lots of therian friends through discord and they r all AMAZING shoutout 2 them <3

6! oh. ohhhhhhhhh listen. this might some weird but one of the things that makes me just. soooo euphoric. ohh. when i meow at another cat and it meows back. like yes!!!!!! you understand me!!!!!!!!!!!!! also for some reason chewing on wood is a close second. my other cats like to do it and its actually like. super fun i love it. the only bad thing is ive gotten so many splinters from like chewing on popsicle sticks and stuff :(

7! yeah. far too often. and the body dysphoria stacked on top of it doesnt help :( where are my pawsssssssss :((((

8! take it slow. and dont push yourself to do anything. please. ive been a therian for about a year now (not very long, i know, but this is just for comparison) and i still dont know everything about my theriotypes and my kintypes. im still working really hard to try and learn quads, and itll take me a very long time to master even the basics. dont be afraid to take your time. alterhumanity isn't something that comes quickly to all, or any, for that matter. dont be ashamed to take it slow.

9! i would LOVE to get my paws on a few masks or tails but due to my parents i don't think thatll be happening anytime soon :( i do have a cardboard mask i started tho! it should be done in a few days, and as long as they dont find it i think we'll be okay

10! a lot of mine stemmed from trauma i think. it seems like the most legitimate answer for me as of now, but im still looking into it :)

11! uhhhh uhm m not quite sure who id tag for this so uh... anyone and everyone is welcome t answer this!!! :D

If you are a alterhuman, reblog and answer these questions!

(don't be afraid to write a lot, do what you want ¯���\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯)

1/ Which category of alterhumanity do you belong to?

2/ What/who is/are your type(s)? (if you have any)

3/ Do you experience shifts? If so, can you tell us your most common shifts and your strangest cameo shift (if you've ever had a cameo shift)?

4/ How do you experience your alterhumanity in everyday life?

5/ What do you think of the community?

6/ What are the things that make you most comfortable and euphoric in your alterhumanity?

7/ Are you experiencing species dysphoria?

8/ What advice would you like to say to a young alterhuman who has just awakened?

9/ Do you have/want to have gears?

10/ Do you know/have any theories about the origin of your alterhumanity? If so, tell us! (all beliefs are legitimate)

11/ Tag someone/a creature to answer these questions!ㅤᵕ̈

[chimeraterm]

Why I love Super Mario Galaxy and how it will forever be THE best game ever made for me (XC3 goes second guys im sorry)

I grew up with Super Mario Galaxy. At first the Good Egg and Honeyhive Galaxy were super easy for 6yr me, but I struggled to beat other levels. Overtime, I learned how to be better and beat other bosses. I still was pretty bad tho, as my biggest save file only got to 60 Stars before I ended up quitting. After all, I had more videogames to discover and more franchises to fall in love with (and perhaps school).

But even with all the unforgivable blast of a games I managed to get, like Wii Sports Resort, where I only ever wanted to smack my friends to death with the plane duel; or Mario Kart Wii, where I perfected the art of MKW Rainbow Road; I did not forget Galaxy.

It felt... different. Like a sort of game I could always come back to if I needed to. As I started growing up, I always kept 2 of my most favorite songs (remixed ofc because no Nintendo on Spotify), Gusty Garden Galaxy (which I reached when I played back from my save file at 46 stars 4 years ago) and Buoy Base Galaxy (which, to this day, I have never reached - YET).

I guess I always liked the feeling of being lonely in outer space yet having the power to conquer entire armies and retrieve a literal star.

In the end this led to me appreciating the sky more and to my ambition of one day becoming an astrophysicist.

One day, I dropped the Wii entirely. What use did I have for playing on my dusty-old Wii when I could play Mario Maker on my 3DS and troll some friends?

3 days ago I finally dusted off my Wii. The thoughts about finally 100%'ing the game could come to an end, but I wanted to beat from scratch, experience it all now. I think I am doing okay, but I know I am doing myself a favor. After all, I am completing that undone feeling of overcoming everything in my way, even if they are galaxies separating me light-years away from my objective. And honestly, there is nostalgia in between, as there always was, but it's not everything.

That sense of being powerful in a powerless state just brings you always back up. And it's why I recommend it to you. Sure, you may not have a Wii with a Wiimote and a SMG disk, but you can always boot up Dolphin Emulator and download a Mario Galaxy copy and try it for yourself. That I highly encourage.

uhm i havent really talked about what i wanted in the title i ended up ranting

anyways good night or day or led lights

#i do not know how to tag #i just tagged it with mario galaxy #slept in the chair for 30 minutes #theres a party outside wtf

[felidaereverse]

tagged by @charlottan yayyy

Favorite books: jesus christ this is a hard first question. almost all are favorites during the moments I read them

Favorite authors: MARY ROACH, Toni Morrison, Alison Bechdel, and I'm sure there's more I'm forgetting at the moment

Favorite genres: SPECULATIVE FICTION, horror, magical realism, GOOD sci-fi & fantasy (very fine line), satire, and graphic novels but also I think graphic novels shouldn't really be their own "genre"

Currently reading: The Firekeeper's Daughter, American Short Fiction 2021 anthology, The Sisters of Dorley, A Raisin in the Sun (actually just finished but I'm still counting it for now until I finish teaching it, aka infinite re-reading)

To-read list: The Botany of Desire: A Plant's-Eye View of the World, American Psycho, The Angel Maker, Walking Practice, Fun Home, Giovanni's Room

Loved as a kid: Eragon series, Eon series, The Little Prince, Warriors series, Under the Dome, Atlas of the Human Body, The Silence of the Lambs (who let me check this out from the library at 11 years old???). can you imagine being an author and having this incredible power to so fundamentally shape the way some young person grows into their person-hood? I imagine this is why people become authors in the first place

Preferred book length: 200-300 pages. 400 can be good from some authors if they're really into the worldbuilding, but beyond that gets grating. less than 200 also can be good from some authors, but usually not enough development for me

Couldn't finish: this is hard because I love to hate-read. Their Vicious Games was a book for a YA lit class last semester and it just was soooo lame. fine concept but the author was just missing OPPORTUNITY after OPPORTUNITY to make it actually GREAT..... not even bad enough to hate-read so fuck this book. YA lit is so so so needed for actual kids but I cannot standdddddd most of it now that I've been exposed to more nuanced books

Fiction or nonfiction: weeps. wails. do I really have to answer this one. I guess fiction because I can hold a longer conversation about it with more people, whereas nonfiction usually needs to be a convo with someone who already cares about that niche. Also unfortunately nonfic authors who care about the artistry as much as fiction writers are harder to find

Buy, library, or read online: libgen.rs my best friend libgen.rs :heart: I would be 100% for library tho if only they had the books I actually wanted. but I do go to my library often to study and play on their piano :3

Most-read author, but that I can't recommend: hmm idk if I have one. I have read a LOT of Stephen King :middle_finger: oh also Malcolm Gladwell pisses me off

Favorite book character: hmm who do I still wonder about... a character I still question... Nel and Sula, from Paradise. especially interesting because you have to talk about them both as two halves of a whole character. especially interesting because I don't particularly like them as people. especially interesting because I still feel intimate connections to them as people. I am so absolutely Gripped by the questioning.

Book(s) that got me back into reading again: Watershed by Percival Everett. the kind of book that makes me want to read so badly that I have to WRITE

tagging anyone who wants to do it :))) Hello Book Fans im so curious

[sl33pyperson]

and thus, ends the time with the wackos

bobbi really took the kids in the divorce

he just looks good here honestly

you KNOW she doesnt shower. musky husky

we love representation o7

just screaming every time khonshu doesnt know how to interact with people (also khonshu FUCKING HATING BABIES i guess u can see it as like. marcs instinct is kicking in and wants to protect the baby or something i dont fucking know, its funnier to not look into it and khonshu just wants to dropkick it)

ok ok ok ok so theres like. a fic where some avengers + mk (jake) get trapped in a room with deadly gas. they dont understand how mk works so they just assume hes being lazy and laying on the ground and not helping him bc he can heal super quickly, when actually jake is dying over and over and over again while khonshu brings him back (until valkyrie fucking screams at everyone) and idk this reminded me of that. love your god being able to fuck around with your body in horrifying ways!!!!

i love for the life of a hero KHONSHU YOU LITERALLY HAVE NO IDEA WHAT UR DOING… COMEDIAN OF THE YEAR but also they 100% fucked in that maze

he just looks good here. the line is so bad tho. khonshu shut the fuck up

love watching this immortal being struggle in his cage <3 gods i want some fucked up mk tho like. make mk actual suprnatural or have fucked up ethereal qualities WAIT THERE WAS A GOOD POST ABOUT THAT ILL NEED TO FIND IT

does. does tigra know? does she fucking know? maam???

i love a rag tag group of villains who have preplanned attacks AND evacuations <3 shroud is hilarious to me

GET ZAPPED FUCKO

there is nothing smart i can say about this. the system is truely a plaything to khonshu, something to be used in khonshus image and nothing else

and when given back control (yes a bunch of snakemen just attacked the moment it happened but still) marc straight away goes into 1. i might fight to live and 2. the only thing certain about myself is tbhat i am moon knight, khonshus fist, WHICH IS ALOT SIR PLEASE GET A REST AFTER THIS

so im not jewish, idk how well the “ive met my maker” line uhhhhh. Works., but marc truly needs time to just. sit down with himself (and the others) and the fact khonshu STILL is manipulating him into being moon knight, doing his bidding, like. marc doesnt do this as a way of redeeming himself, he just thinks its the right thing to do and what HE IS at this point, “for now and forever, strike in my name” FUCK OFF KHONSHUUUUUUUUU SHUT UPPPP LEAVE MY POOR MAN ALONE

i understand marc Very Much Not Wanting A Relationship Or Anything after these months of possession and hell but also lol rip tigra (i feel bad shes literally lost her whole team in wackos and people she cared about tho, give my girl a break too)

fairwell wackos, fairwell weird talks about marriage (which writer at marvel as getting a divorce at this time), marc now gets a. oh shit nevermind marc spector series is literally the same year apparently? no breaks for my man

i have no faith for the next Oh God Theres So Much Of The Marc Spector Series Please Fucking Help Me. the fact its CALLED marc spector just gives off all the bad signs for me, love bad faith interpretations and completely ignoring the fact jake and steven are REAL AND THERE!! the wackos almost hit it with marc realising “lol its funny my thoughts appear just like jake and stevens, huh” but now hes falling back into “i made them up and just went crazy hehe” thoughts which i truly hope the writers dont take as the actual truth…… 60 issues of hell baby lets fucking go!!

[nvr-pass]

actually re: my tags on my previous post bc i remembered this is my blog and i can monologue about whatever pretentious shit i want. i think part of my bewilderment at these people is bc my media behaviour is so antithetical to this happening. here's an essay or w/e ..

basically, i read blake snyder's save the cat a couple years ago (interesting, if you read it with a huge grain of salt) and he talks about the importance of taglines. he's says that people will only decide to see your movie based on a single sentence and poster the cinema/magazine provides about your movie, so it's important to make sure to communicate your hook and set up the correct expectations in your audience in just that little impression they will get. that's what they will decide on to see your movie and that's what will dictate how the think about it beginning to end.

synder's only thinking in the specific milieu and time he wrote his screenplays for, but i think he was onto something with the huge impact of what your audience thinks the movie will be beforehand. if the audience somehow gets the wrong impression before the movie even started, there's a good chance they will hate your movie, regardless of its actual quality. (q.e.d. those reviews i made fun of.)

like i said, synder's view on the issue is very limited, but you've always had to have heard of a piece of media somehow. something, somewhere brought you to it and what exactly it was that got you interested has a huge (often subconscious) impact on what you will think of it. there has to be a reason why you think it will interest you.

there are no more tv guides that dictate our cinema night, but there sure are trailers and reviews and promotion posts and whatever our friend tell us. it's still very much happening.

and i dislike it. i really dislike knowing half the movie from the trailer alone. i dislike the entire set-up of the movie being incredibly boring because i already know what will happen from a 5 second snippet in the trailer. and this doesn't make the movie unenjoyable (unless it's really really bad) because there is loads of enjoyment to be found it stories that you already know (see any popular shakespeare play. im not watching them bc i want to know the plot!). but i still wonder how i often i actually watch a movie i know nothing about. how often im watching them like the makers thought i would, being introduced to every element only as it appears.

ever since, i've made an actual effort to know as little about a piece of media as possible before experiencing it. i've still managed to find stuff i like, often through obscure tumblr posting by users i know share the same taste in media as me. and sometimes through sheer luck and curiosity like clicking on random youtube recommendations of musical bootlegs.

and i am by now means saying that this is the superior media experience! i watched heathers, thinking it would be like highschool musical during act 1 and then i was gutted. i loved it. but there are very good reasons why heathers should have appropriate content warnings and i would not recommend it to others without mentioning the murder (or knowing the other person very very well). knowingly avoiding content indicators is born from the privilege of being okay to see all fictional content there could be and being open to any genre. it works for me because i enjoy it and find it interesting this way.

i just often think about how differently we all experience the same piece of media, not just from our internal bias but also from the trivial fact of how we heard of it and what we already know or expect from it.

i also made the experience that not knowing what a piece of media's strength is supposed to be leaves me open to appreciate any strength i find. this often has to do with genre expectations: for example i don't care if the plot of an action movie is stupid if the action scenes are cool, and i don't care if the action scenes in a romantic comedy are silly if the relationships are interesting etc. that's not what these movies are about! i find that when i don't know what my genre expectations are supposed to be im very forgiving to any flaws or weaknesses bc im assuming that that's probably not what it is about and that's okay. i try to find what it is about and what they were trying to do and i value it for whatever it does manage well.

i notice this a lot with with people watching a movie from a genre they are not familiar with. im thinking especially western audiences watching asian cinema. it operates by completely different rules because it's its own culture and idustry and often gets dragged (very very unfairly) for being "cheap". this is purely bc said audience is expecting and judging things that the makers of these movies or shows obviously never thought were the most important. and if you impose onto these movies that these things should be the most important and should be done a certain way, then that might be your own valid interpretation of whatever, but i think it's your own fault if you didn't like it.

trying to understand media while being cautious about whatever expectations you impose upon it can really make you enjoy movies so much more without having to compromise your annoying(affectionate) overanalyzing. trust me. open your mind, step into the light. bad movies can have earnest attempts to convey something if your willing to look kindly. picking it apart will be much more fun if you're trying to locate the little kernel that did work and trying to find why it worked and what its pitwalls were and how they could've been avoided.

anyways i lied this wasn't an essay it was just a ramble about media approaches. feel free to leave a comment of any length if you have any thoughts on this :^)

[starmanskywalker]

on the brink • anakin skywalker/reader

tw for war crimes and non-con. i mean it. minors dni. this is a darkfic

writing the jedi as a menace is intriguing. this is set in the final months of the clone wars bc anakin was never hotter. i hope u enjoy it! and im accepting prompts too

description: A war's a war. Anakin was already used to bending the rules.

In which Reader is a hacker working for crime lords and Anakin simply doesn't have the patience to get the information he needs through ethical means. 

tags: smut, noncon, interrogation kink

word count: 3.882

When your secretary told you with desperation on her voice that Anakin Skywalker and Obi-Wan Kenobi, out of all Jedis in the galaxy, were coming to your office, you knew you were absolutely, utterly fucked.

If regret could kill you would be already six feet under by now. You told your partner time and time again that working with the Pykes would bring so much unwanted attention to your business and it did. Now she's probably dead or caught, and you knew your fate wasn't going to be much different. 

(It flatters you a bit that the Jedis sent Obi-Wan and Anakin to deal with you, though. You knew they were the best the Jedi had to offer.)

Still your heart raced on your chest and thundered in your ears. Did you lack the courage to remain active in your field? Perhaps. But no one, whenever they think of a strategy or a job, really thinks about the possibility that everything will go to shit.

Maker, you really shouldn’t have postponed the construction of your escape route. That was really amateurish of you.

As the once deafening sounds of blasters become more and more quiet and the electric sound of lightsaber movements are coming closer and becoming louder, you, maybe pointlessly, reach for your own blaster, hidden in a small drawer on your desk. You may be terrified, but you're not a coward and you faked confidence really well. Maybe you can even put an end to this story in a civilized manner - after all, Jedis are peacekeepers, not soldiers, right? What is the worst that could happen? The first time you faced them didn't go that bad.

The first time you faced them also ended with a promise you wouldn’t ever work with shady species again. You have now become one of their most important allies, but that’s a very tiny detail on the scheme of things.

The sounds all come to an end. You can only hear muffled banter shared between the two Jedis on the other side of the steel door. You knew it would take them a sweet while to bypass your security system, after all, that was your specialty, but you knew that the Force was a hell of an efficient tool against any mechanism, fancy or not. The air seems to get thicker and thicker and it’s becoming harder to breathe.

A click. The door’s open. 

Dank farrik. 

You try to still your hands while your grasp around your gun tightens.

“Oh, what a nice surprise. We thought you would be long gone by now.” The good old Skywalker cockiness. You definitely didn’t miss it.

“Where’s Synni? What have you done to her?” You ask, firmly enough, pointing your blaster in their direction while they, very slowly, almost imperceptibly really, corner you.

“Your partner’s currently in the hands of the Republic, darling,” Obi-Wan answers. “Because she’s not as important as you are to us right now.”

You sigh, trying to release the tension from your body. Everything happens so fast: you don't even have a chance to fire your blaster given how quickly Anakin overpowers and disarms you, pressing your chest firmly to your desk while he cuffs you. You were a pathetic fucking fight, doesn’t matter how hard you tried to wriggle out of his iron grip. That’s why you stuck with computers. “Tsk, I thought you would be better trained by now, Y/N. Or even better, that you would come to your senses and keep your word to us that you would stay out of this world. Guess I was wrong.”

“Fuck you. You don’t know what I went through.” You mutter, your arms and shoulders burning from the aggression he’s handling you with. Anakin is rougher in every sense. His voice’s deeper, he has a scar in his eye, his eye bags have worsened considerably. He’s no longer the man you’ve met a few years ago, and if it weren’t for his partner’s presence, the Jedi insignia still standing mighty on his shoulder, his blue eyes and blue saber, you’d easily guess he turned. He emanates violence. 

Curiously, Obi-Wan hasn’t gone through that intense of a change. Skywalker grabs you unceremoniously by your hair, lifting you so his face is impossibly close to yours. You gasp in surprise and because your new position makes you. Obi-Wan’s eyes are tinted with a slight concern at the scene. “Watch your language. You’re not exactly in the position to speak up to me like that.” Anakin’s tone makes a shiver run profoundly down your spine.

“‘m sorry-agh,” Is all you’re able to answer. At least this gets his fingers out of your aching scalp.

“Anakin,” Kenobi warns, totally unsure of his ex-padawan’s approach. You see there’s more he wants to say, but he keeps his words to himself. “I think it's best if I conduct the interrogation from here.”

“No. That was a task directly assigned to me because this needs to be done quickly. You go deal with the Pykes, I deal with her.” He answers, pulling you to him by your cuffed arms. Obi-Wan doesn’t protest - it’s like an incoming divorce is unfolding right in front of your eyes. He’s avoiding conflict in a way you’ve never seen before. 

“May I at least share it with you then?”

“What is your kriffing problem with me today? You think I can’t handle it? She’ll break in a second.” Wow. Skywalker was even more short tempered than usual.

“That’s precisely what I’m worried about. Don’t forget the Code.”

Anakin huffs in irony, a not so enthusiastic smile on his face as he drags you to the nearest dark room. “I won’t even respond to that, Master.”

What the hell is going on with the Jedis lately?

As you arrive in the now eerily empty storage room, Anakin throws you harshly on the ground. At least you knew how to fall this time so you wouldn’t get an injury. Skywalker crouches in front of you, the look in his face enigmatic as he grabs you by the chin. His hands are so rough against your skin. “Who briefed you on the invasion of the Jedi library systems?”

You swallowed, thinking very carefully of what you were going to say to him. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” You almost whisper, eyes not leaving his.

“Wrong answer.” He says, abruptly slapping you then grabbing your chin and turning your face once again to him in an even more aggressive manner. “Don’t whisper. Our technicians found a holo signature that led us straight to you. We already know the Pykes intermediated the whole deal, but they weren’t the ones who laid out the plan. Now, let’s try again: who briefed you on the invasion of the Jedi library systems?”

You felt your eyes burn. You felt terribly intimidated and humiliated and you also felt deathly afraid of the consequences of ratting on someone as powerful as Darth Sidious. You didn’t want to die. You felt like crying. “I can’t tell you. He’ll find me wherever you put me.”

“And what makes you think I’ll make it easier on you if you don’t tell me what I need to know?” He pushes your head against the wall, making your vision blurry for a while. He’s dying to give you a concussion, it seemed. He grabs you by your neck, lifting you while holding you down with your spine flush against the wall. You can feel some spots of your jumpsuit ripping on your back and the hot sting on your skin due to the friction with the steep stone. He was so kriffing strong. 

You try to push his hands away, kick him and mark his skin with your nails with all your might so you can try to fucking breathe, but fighting against him was practically useless. “‘Cause--you’re a Jedi,” You manage to groan, your eyelids fluttering, lungs burning from the lack of oxygen reaching them and to further your humiliation, you feel a tear running down your cheek. “Though I now get--why Kenobi was--so worried about you.”

“You don’t know shit!” He once again overpowers you with ease, anger dominating his once softer features while his scream chills you to your core.

Your limbs are losing strength. Your thrashing is getting weaker. You’re losing the will to fight as his grip on your neck tightens and tightens. He’ll break your fucking neck in this pace. 

Then, as if by Force, he releases you from his deathly grip just as you’re seconds away from slipping out of conscience. Maybe he knew he was going too far.

He decides not to discuss this specific matter further as you cough violently. 

Have you gotten into his mind?

This thought quickly leaves your mind as he manhandles you to turn you around, pinning your two hands against your back as the rough pads of his fingers inspect and caress your fresh wounds with curiosity (or was it regret?), drawing a wince and a sharp inhalation from you as your lungs try to recover from the assault.

Some very silent seconds follow and you don’t know what to expect. Was he going to heal you? Can Jedis do that? Was he going to pierce your sternum with his lightsaber?

Still, you had nothing left to lose.

You mumble a quiet “You changed so much.”. He probably already knows by now, but you couldn’t miss the opportunity to note.

“You don’t know shit, Y/N,” he repeats, quieter this time. His hand grabs the border of one the cuts in your jumpsuit and rips it, widening it significantly in one swift motion. Your brain hadn’t quite caught up with what was happening, but despite your confusion, you wonder if Obi-Wan’s listening on the other side of the door and you consider screaming for his help, because this possibility didn’t even cross your mind and you imagine it violates at least one thousand different laws of the Jedi Code. “Don’t you dare scream,” he murmurs, his knees prying your legs open. No matter how hard you try to close them, he’s much too strong to compete with, and he forces them wide enough for him to step between them with ease. “He can’t help you. I sent him away. I’ll have to take this information out of you by other means.”

You try to wriggle away from his grip, to no avail once again as a furious snarl escapes your lungs. “No!” you exclaim, "Fuck no, God, please, no!”

He reveled in your shock, taking advantage of the moment by he let himself indulge in each of your responses. “Watch your fucking language.” A wave of despair bubbles from your throat in a series of sobs. “And don’t be so dramatic. You asked for this the moment you chose not to comply.”

You have your eyes tight shut. He pulls your face closer with his other hand, again punishing your scalp, and you flinch as you feel his midriff against your bare, still stinging back and butt.

His fist leaves your hands and curls around the thin fabric of your panties, and with one jerk, he’s torn them from your body with a horrible sound echoing around you. Even though he stopped holding you against the wall, you were still totally incapable of using your hands and arms to try to escape out of this situation: you truly didn’t know if he was pinning you with the Force, if you just completely froze with fear or froze due to the sick, sick arousal that’s growing fast in your belly. He grunts low, like a beast, when the rough pads of his digits worm their way underneath your delicate nether lips. You open your eyes, trying to flinch but you can’t. You bite down on your cry and it manifests as a powerless squeak as he draws little circles on your clit with the tip of his fingers. Such a wickedly accurate touch. You hate how your body is reacting to his ministrations - and he knows it. This is in no way meant to be pleasant to you. It absolutely ruins and breaks people inside to feel their bodies betraying them like that. “You want this, you dirty slut. Otherwise you’d try to run away again.”

You suppress such needy moans, hips rocking to try and escape his filthy caress. The apples of your cheeks burn with humiliation. Had you truly been turned on at the prospect of danger, or was the Jedi full of shit? You couldn’t remember properly, like everything before this sad situation was a distant memory. “That’s why you didn’t leave crime, huh? Wanted to be punished by a Jedi?” He teases, your mouth dropping open when he uses the pads of his fingers to rub you. “If you want this to stop, then tell me what I need to know. It’s simple as that.”

You sucked in a few deep breaths so you could speak. “I--can’t. I can’t!”, you whined. Anakin presses harder on your clit and rubbed faster, making you moan sharply.

Once he’s got you properly wet and pulsing, he presses two of his fingers inside you, a sharp burn spreading like wildfire across your core as his pace is relentless from the start. 

“No--fuck--you don’t know--what led me to this,” An amalgamation of a gasp and a moan leaves your lips, the salty taste of your tears meeting your tongue. “That’s not why I--Ple-please, Anakin. Please--stop,” you mewl, voice shaky with so much fear and need.

“Your body isn’t acting like it wants me to.” He chuckles darkly. “You’re almost biting my kriffing fingers off with all the clenching.” Skywalker swears under his breath, panting. You clung to the wall as your breathing stuttered.

The way you squirmed underneath him, how your pulse made you tremble, your shaky breath, the sight of your quivering lips, the small pleas that left your mouth, the way your eyebrows pinched together when he pressed his digits deep inside your pussy; all clouded his mind and it felt as if he was surrounded by a blissful haze made of nothing but everything that was you. Sweat trickled down your face and you knew you were close. You didn’t want to give up like that. Not like this. Not to him. Anakin feels the strength of your repulse and reluctance through the Force, and now yearned to finger fuck any resistance you had left right out of you. He wanted to see you unravel entirely, right before his eyes. 

He lost himself in more ways than he imagined.

He watched your face intently, feeling your body tense as he led you to the edge. But right before you orgasm, he removes his fingers from you, leaving you empty. He turns you around again and stares at you. Your face confused, your mouth ajar. 

Without another word he pushed his digits onto your lips, smearing them slightly with your slick. “Suck them." He orders, his tone of voice leaving no room for argument. Hesitantly, you gathered all the courage you had left as well as some saliva while you suppressed the growing thought of spitting in his face.

And at last, you slowly part your mouth, sticking your tongue out just a little to take him in and close your lips around the fingers in your mouth, gently swirling your tongue around and between them, while shyly looking in fear to see any sign of dissatisfaction from him while your flavor blends with the flavor of your tears in your tastebuds. 

After his fingers are clear enough, he instructs you to lay down your back as he frees himself from his pants. You already found out by now there was no use in resisting.

Not even when he invades your thoughts mid-fingering and, after already gathering the information he needed, still lays over you once more and engulfs your small frame completely with his larger one. This wasn’t about Sidious anymore.

Perhaps it never was.

“Are you mad at me? For not… keeping my promise?” You manage to whimper through the crying and the stinging in your eyes. “Is this what all this is about?” You couldn't tell what was clouding your mind and judgement at that moment, the dizziness left from your own taste on his fingers, the fear of what was about to come or even worse, the mind-numbing shame that you were waiting for it, for him. Words were stuck in your throat, lips parted and eyes focused on his Adam's apple to avoid looking at the prominent bulge pressing against you or his eyes boring into you.

“You’re so naïve, you know that?” The darkness lurking in this last sentence of his sends shivers down your spine as you felt the head of his cock pressed against your soaked entrance. He guides it impatiently up and down the length of your folds, mixing his fluids with yours. “I got what I wanted from you--now I’m taking my reward.” You shut your eyes and pressed your lips together as firmly as you could, stunned by that you even had the guts to ask him something like that. At the sound of a quiet sigh coming from above you, you hesitantly opened one eye to peek at his reaction. “I couldn’t care less about your troubles, Y/N.”

You knew his words were supposed to sting, pierce and stab holes into you but you couldn't think. All you wanted him to do was to let him take everything he wanted and be done with it. You knew there was never a path to salvation, so your expectation significantly lowered to… just leaving this place alive.

Your breath gets knocked out of you as he enters you with a sharp thrust, and you try your best to prevent his subsequent movements from making you hit your head by holding onto him more tightly. 

His hands slid up and down your body all the while, clearly favoring your hips and chest, tugging what’s left of your jumpsuit out of the way every time it rode back up so that he could get a good look at the way your tits bounced while he fucked you senseless. Even so, he was quickly becoming frustrated with these clothes of yours. Almost as frustrated as he'd been with you. He finally paused while he was still inside of you and unexpectedly forced the material up and over your chest, and out of the way for good.

"Much better." He snarls. You instinctively remove your hands from his neck to try and cover yourself, but his hands found your wrists in record time. "Don’t even think about it," He says, thrusting his hips roughly for emphasis. Despite having tried your best to give up fighting just earlier, you couldn't help but squeeze him as if you were unconsciously attempting to prevent him from moving. In response, he moaned, thrusting endlessly into your wet heat. Panting against your flesh as his hips steadily pumped into you, the sound of his skin slapping against yours echoed in the small confines of the storage. He wraps his fingers around your neck again, watching your lids open wider as fear grew in your glossy eyes. Meanwhile, his somber, dilated pupils weren't letting anything be seen behind them. Only desire and lust were made obvious to you.

“W-wait, I-” A well-aimed thrust of his hips cuts you off before you could finish your sentence, and his lips found yours before you could say anything else. He thrust his tongue into your mouth, filling it just as thoroughly as he was filling you elsewhere. You briefly considered fighting him, attempting to push him off you, but if there was one thing that had become unbearably clear from the minute you’ve met again it's that he was significantly bigger than you and more than capable of taking what he wanted.

Instead, you merely squirmed beneath him, as he kissed the oxygen right out of your lungs. He didn't stop kissing you, but you could still hear a warning growl rumble in his throat at this mild show of disobedience, and you immediately stilled in response. 

You couldn't fight back, you couldn't scream, you couldn't even clench your teeth and bite him or you were in for a far worse fate than what was already coming. Your last resort was to not only let him take everything he wanted, but also help him get it, as quickly as possible. Wrapping your legs around his waist, you tried your best to meet his unforgiving thrusts, making you whine uncontrollably as you heard the wet slapping sounds fill the room. You just wanted him to finish, but your mind was getting dangerously hazy and a familiar feeling kept getting stronger and stronger in your stomach. You were praying that he couldn't feel it, but you knew by now that he could read you like an open book. You only wished he could finish before you did, but that didn't seem like something he would let happen, as he clearly took more pleasure in watching you crumble piece by piece under him than immediately releasing inside you.

"Stop. Fighting." Skywalker panted, thrusting even faster, hitting your sweet spot with each pump of his hips. He was so close himself, but he wouldn't - he couldn't do it before you do. He wanted to see it. The rapture of orgasm that would be followed directly by the shame that he had been the one who had made you feel that way. Another growl crawled up his throat as a dominant, angry expression took its place on his face. "I know you want to cum on my cock. Fuck. So–ah––cum.” 

As if on command, the last bit of composure you had snapped, abandoning you and leaving you at your most vulnerable under him as your entire being shook and breaths became harder to take in. 

You trembled as you tried to come down from your high, still trying to assimilate what the fuck just happened. The sheer terror and shame you feel, all while he gets what he feels he deserves for being so unbelievably efficient at what he does all the time, is what pushes him to his release. It takes what it feels like forever for him to empty himself on you and when he finishes his job, all you feel is warmth everywhere but in your thoughts. His presence became so unbearably cold.

After he steadies his breathing just enough, he finally takes his cock out of you, cleaning himself and fixing his attire with the practice of someone who clearly isn’t a beginner at this specific brand of violence. 

He gets up, something you simply can’t find the will or strength to do. Anakin brings his commlink to life. “Obi-Wan?”

“Anakin–how was it?” 

“Effective, as always. Sidious is the one behind the invasion.”

“As we thought.” Kenobi answers, contemplative. “What did you do to get that information out of Y/N?”

You look at him, frightened. He’s sure you won’t say anything, and he replies while admiring the damage he’s done with a sick look of triumph in his face. “Nothing a Jedi wouldn’t do, Master.”

[thesunandmoons-blog]

memories

cw/tw : none !!!

Word count : 918

Fandom : redacted asmr

Pair : sam/darlin

this truly is a sickly sweet fanfic and i literally love the two of them. sorry if it’s a little ooc, im trying my best :’) i had to write this one twice because my computer decided it didn’t like me after i wrote it the first time, but it’s done !!

@stars-shaped-clouds requested this piece of work!! also tagging @gavinsdeviant for the notifs :D

if you wanna read on ao3!! 

Sam was never surprised to find Darlin’ with no food in the pantry. There was maybe a full pack of ramen and a couple sodas or waters in the fridge, but otherwise the pantry collected dust and their freezer’s ice maker just flowed over. There wasn’t really any kind of food in there until Sam had come over, invited of course, carrying an arm’s full of groceries to stock up his shifter’s kitchen.

He decided he needed to get them into feeding themself properly rather than stocking up on dried up sodium packets that were worse than eating nothing at all. 

“You know, you didn’t need to buy all of this stuff, Sam,” Darlin’ huffed, hands on their hips as they looked at the vampire. “Well, I wouldn’t need to if you properly fed yourself, Darlin’.” Sam was quick to bite back, a small smirk dawning his lips as his brow quirked up, eyes peeking over to them. With a sigh and a shake of the head, he turned his head to look at them, asking, “Darlin’, are you just gonna stand there, or can you help a vamp unload some groceries? They are for you, y’know.” 

They couldn’t help but let a chuckle bubble out of their throat, shaking their head and rolling their eyes. “Fine, whatever.” Darlin’ was unaware of Sam’s plan to teach them to cook that night, hence all of the groceries. He was seriously tired of watching them only eat easy meals, and wanted to see something substantial go into them for once.

And when he told them his, they only scoffed, hands back on the hips and facing him fully. “Excuse me, southern boy, but I know how to cook!” Sam couldn’t help but let out a gutteral laugh, almost tempted to wipe his eye of any faux tears from laughing so much. “Really, Darlin’, that is one of the funniest things I think you’ve ever said to me.” They only scowled, arms crossing. “I seriously can cook! I learned when I was a kid.” They almost looked like they were gonna throw a tantrum, Sam giving a small chuckle before gently placing his hands on their shoulders. “Whatever you say, Darlin’. But seriously, tonight, I’m showin’ you how to cook somethin’ that can actually feed you some kinda nutrients, not just sodium and fake flavoring.” Darlin’ scoffed, rolling their eyes. “Yeah, yeah.”

Sam was genuinely surprised to see Darlin’ not doing a half-bad job in the kitchen. Their hands were fairly skilled, and he could almost compare them to David in terms of cooking. They probably ranked right below him in the “who can cook” ranking in the Shaw pack, and Sam made sure to keep a mental note of that. Who knew his Darlin’ could cook?

It wasn’t long before Sam’s nose was overwhelmed by the delicious scent of a random pasta dish the shifter found online, the two of them seated at the couch, each with a plate in hand. Those plates were quickly emptied, bellies full and happy sighs echoing in the apartment.

Like the southern gentleman he is, Sam took to his feet, taking Darlin’s plate from their hands, and placing both plates in the sink. He trotted back to the couch, motioning to the seat directly next to them. “May I?” He knew he probably didn’t need to ask, considering they’d been seeing each other for a while now, but he still thought the gesture would be nice. They nodded, a small smile on their lips. “You don’t need to ask, you know.” He only nodded back in agreement, taking his seat.

His arm found its way lolled across the back of the couch, and Darlin’ took the opportunity to snuggle into his side. They were still learning the ropes of all of this ‘lovey’ stuff, but they were really liking it nevertheless. 

“Y’know, you truly surprised me tonight, Darlin’. I really didn’t think you’d cook somethin’ so tasty.” He gave them a toothy grin, and he recieved roll of the eyes in return. “I told you I could! Gabe taught me when I was younger, and I actually managed to listen half the time, so...” They trailed off, eyes wandering from Sam’s down to their lap. He took the opportunity to get them talking, especially about something that made them feel good. 

The way Darlin’ could smile and talk about their childhood with Gabe for the next hour and a half was nothing but perfect to Sam. They went on and on, and not a single thing that came out of their mouth hinted that, during those times, they felt alone.  They sounded to proud of the moments they spent learning with Gabe, and it made Sam’s heart swell. 

“...and yeah, I guess that’s really it.” Their sentence trailed off, eyes peering down to their lap. Sam’s hand gently took hold of their jaw, tilting their face so their eyes could meet. His eyes were glazed over with adoration and love, love just for them.  “Can I kiss you?” His words almost came out as a whisper, and their head nodded, eyes shutting for a brief moment when they kissed. It was a sweet, slow kiss, Sam pulling away after a few seconds. His head tilted down to rest on Darlin’s shoulder, his smile pressed against their neck. “I... love you, y’know that? You really are amazing.” His words had their eyes wide, a dopey smile on their face. 

“Yeah yeah, I love you too...”