#mah lumber yard job

[aroihkin]

So I quit the shitty lumber yard job at 6:40 AM this morning. Went back to bed as suddenly I wasn’t being kept awake by anxiety anymore (I first woke up around 5 AM and could not go back to sleep ‘til 6 like I wanted to, because anxiety).

I went to bed at 10 PM so it wasn’t tiredness from not enough hours, just stress.

Anyway, woke up at 1 PM to find I’d gotten a call at 9:50 AM from a part time donut maker job wanting to interview me~ I gotta wait until 2 to get my day/time for the interview though, because when I called in the person was off at lunch.

Getting an interview doesn’t mean I’ve got the job, but it’s a promising thing to have happen the very same day I quit the shady lumber yard.

[aroihkin]

job bullshit

Okay, so, a few weeks ago on St. Patricks day I had an interview and I got hired that day at an outdoor lumber yard. I started working the next day.

Two weeks into it I got pulled aside by my boss and her HR/assistant person and told that I was coming in late every day and it was inexcusable. “Late” in this case was, my shift starts at 8 AM, I’d walk in the door at 8 AM, write down my start time on my timesheet, then put all my gear on and put my radio on after. This was “late”.

Every other job I’ve ever had, you come in, you punch in on time, then you gear up / get your register / set up for the day. I’m not talking about making my lunch or something either, I mean putting on my back brace, slipping my box knife, pen, and gloves into my pockets, pulling my sweater back on over it if it’s cold out, then putting on my radio and turning it on once it’s in place.

This was “late”.

I accepted this and moved on, started showing up ten minutes early every day. I have not failed to do so once since that chat.

My Saturday start time is 9 AM. So, this last Saturday, I was there at 8:50... had to wait to be let in because the gate was locked. Got into the office itself at 8:55, geared up, and had my radio on and in my ear by 9 AM. There’s literally nothing going on that I’m allowed to help with, the other yard guy is driving forklifts and trucks out of the barn and I’m literally not allowed to do that yet because I’m not on the insurance.

So I just kinda stand around indoors chewing on free donuts, waiting for him to be done with that and/or waiting for the trickle of customers to eventually need something loaded from the yard so I can take that while Kris is busy moving equipment around. My radio is on, it’s in my ear, if Kris wants me to do something I am a button push away.

Boss lady starts getting agitated, but I honestly don’t know why. I banter a little with some customers who are waiting in line, and generally am just chilling.

Then at 9:10 I get snapped at by boss lady that I need to be outside “helping Kris” because it’s “after 9″. So, fine, I go outside to fucking watch him move the forklifts and shit around. That’s helping, I guess. Stand around outside instead of inside, got it. By this point he’s actually finished moving stuff and he and I start in on general Saturday between-customers chores and it’s fine.

Fast forward to yesterday.

I was only given a six hour shift, which seems to be the new normal until things “get busy in the summer”, especially since they hired another new guy who started yesterday as well. Cool, fine, that’s less money but maybe I can ease into memorizing the yard and getting my muscles back, somewhat.

First, they try to convince me to not take a lunch break. Which I think is illegal with a six hour shift? I know at least that I’d have to sign a waiver, which I hadn’t.

Pre-diabetic that I am, I insist that I’ll be taking my half hour lunch break and let them figure out when. I get sent on the spot, which is fine by me because I’m hungry. I go inside, sit down, eat my sandwiches. 28 minutes later I’m coming out of the bathroom and putting my back brace back on. At the 30 minute mark I’ve got my radio back on and in my ear, and a customer’s dog wants scritches while the customer watches, so I spend a few minutes scritching the doggy lots and making her a happy pup.

Again, the radio is on and it’s in my fucking ear.

Also, when I was sent on lunch, I wasn’t in the midst of any projects. There are no customers who currently need help in the yard (I’d hear over the radio if there was). I’m literally in a slump of ‘hurry up and wait for something to do’.

So I finish petting the doggy and go outside to my car, throw my lunch bag in, pull out my thermos and refill my travel mug with tea. Now, mind you, with my radio on and in my ear, I am doing something I’m supposedly allowed to do at all times if I’m not helping a customer. I’m allowed to walk over to my car and refill my tea mug even if I’m in the middle of a project. It’s literally as long as a customer doesn’t need help. Even if a customer had needed help while I was petting the doggo, I would have just tossed my lunch bag in on the way, as Jack’s parked between the office and the rest of the yard and the customer has to come outside as well and get in their vehicle and then drive over to wherever I’m meeting them. It’s not a fucking big deal.

But at this point if I’m not off my fucking lunch break I don’t know what I am.

(Also, side note -- we don’t have official breaks? So if the yard is super busy there just is no pausing. More on that in a moment.)

I finish refilling my mug, toss my thermos back in my car, and walk out into the wide open yard to find my semi-boss and the other new guy. Other new guy, by the way, was allowed to sit around in the break room area for most of my lunch break without officially taking a lunch. But I digress. I walk out, and I see semi-boss glance at his watch and I hear him mutter than I’m ten minutes late “but oh well”.

At this point it’s six minutes after the end of my lunch. I know because I looked at that point, too.

But even then, I thought I was on time with my radio in and all that fucking shit.

So, long story short, I’m pretty sure I’m about to be let go from my new job because I’m “always late” -- because I’m not a fucking mind reader. They also treat the newer new guy totally different than they treat me; I’ve never been allowed to go inside and sit down for twenty minutes while on the clock. Not once. Not even when it was pouring down rain and there was nothing to do. New guy is cis. I’m a non-passing trans man who is not “out” at work. That makes me the first person with tits to work in the yard in over thirty years.

So, I can see what’s going on here.

But god damn. I have actual, serious anxiety. I’m riddled with PTSD from decades of abuse. This whole constant “I think I’m doing fine! Yay new job! -- NO YOU FUCKED IT UP GRAR YOU’RE LAZY” thing is playing havok with my mental and physical health.

On top of that, the lack of official breaks? The way they tried to get me to not take a lunch break? The fact that none of the other yard guys actually take their full lunch period even on a slow day? Semi-boss guy was proudly and happily telling me the other day that sometimes when the yard is busy he’s worked ten hours without a single break and not even noticed.

I guarantee you I would notice.

Also this shit is illegal as hell.

So I’m apping furiously at other places, including a local lumber company and Lowe’s as a loader, because that’s basically what I am at this place and it’s not the labor itself that’s really fucking with me. Though it will if I’m expected to lug around 80-100lb bags of concrete, and one end of soaking wet 4″x8″x20′ boards, and shit like that all day every day without a break if there just happens to be too many customers that day. As it is, I already had my back try to go out on me on Saturday and it wasn’t even that busy.

But I don’t think they’re going to keep me.

And I’m not sure I want them to, in the long run.

I just want another job before this one sinks, though I worry it won’t work out that way. When has it ever? It took me months just to find this damn job.

And fuck, does walking on eggshells, never knowing if I’m doing good or fucking up, fuck with me so fucking bad. I had to call in sick today because I sat up in bed and then literally couldn’t move for twenty minutes, locked up from stress. It’s only my second time calling in sick (in an intensive, fucked up, high altitude job), but I’m sure that’ll get used against me too. The regulars probably never call in, just like they never need actual breaks or full lunches...

TL;DR: Nothing is allowed to go right and I am a fucking failure as always. Also, companies with eight whole employees do some shady fucking shit, legalities wise. Also, stating what you fucking want is apparently too much to ask for, news at 11.

[aroihkin]

eatenbyagrue

 “job bullshit”

Sounds like they're being fucking dicks to their employees just because they can. Fucking hell that sucks.

It's basically like I'm union and they've all willingly and cheerfully gone non-union and act like it's a right-to-work state because fuck laws. While I'm like... bruh I didn't sign up for this, I see everyone else has, even the new new guy skipped his lunch and when I said I think that's illegal he was all "well that's stupid, it shouldn't be"... So he'll fit in just fine. Me though, not so much.

And this is in fucking California, not Idaho. I’d expect this shit in Idaho. I have permanent damage to my body from doing labor in Idaho. This is California what the fuck is going on.

[aroihkin]

Saturday was my first day at the new job. I literally met someone for a total of about ten minutes, outside in the open air, without touching him, who said he’s sick.

Aaaaaaand caught his cold.

This is gonna be an interesting first week at what’s already going to be a physically brutal job for me. =_=

I work Tuesdays through Saturdays, so maybe I can just kinda... rest and drink a lot of liquids and maybe kinda... try to get it to fuck off, today. I hope.