#madara's mama persona is too fucking strong

[nazuna-tunnel-vision]

every time i see someone refer to madara as some kind of dad or brother figure for an unwilling kohaku i have to stop myself from saying anything because like. that dynamic is so funny and cute and i always laugh too, but it is also 80% not canon. anzu forced them into a playdate under the guise of work, and now kohaku has to shake madara down to even get his leader to give him any info about their upcoming work. the way that in Secret Service (SS preliminaries), kohaku was all "hm i'm only allowed to participate in one region so i'm not sure how I can participate in both Crazy:B and DF at once. I need to talk to Madara-han about this." and madara didn't even bother fighting for kohaku's custody and left on his own without a word. kohaku had to chase him down across japan.

like i said in another post before, kohaku's the one holding up half a heart sign and madara's doing the thumbs up. (or more accurately, he snuck away when kohaku looked away for a sec and isn't even there at all.) kohaku is perhaps the person most entitled to gift madara a "world's worst mama" T-shirt but he wouldn't because 1) he's a good kid and would never do something that passive-aggressive, and 2) he is genuinely trying so hard to get madara to understand that he's there for him. kohaku's actually the emotional pillar of support between the 2 of them is what i'm saying.