#luz is of course where i first gravitate these days but if u want a more unpleasant woman who suffers horribly in her canon

[crimeronan]

there's something well-meaning but also kind of insidious about the idea that you have to be Careful and Gentle with how you hurt female characters, lest you accidentally recreate misogynist violence in your work. particularly when this gets paired with "female characters shouldn't cry or break down too often because that's stereotypical feminine weakness" (this particular advice DOES seem to be going out of fashion these days, though. Thank God).

i'm thinking about how people have pointed out that women in popular fiction & fanwork are often comforting their tortured boyfriends about their sad abusive pasts, without receiving any of that same emotional support in turn -- effectively just becoming tools for said sad boyfriend's character growth. and how much rarer it is for that gender dynamic to be flipped, with the boy comforting the girl. and also how this trope is even More prevalent when it's a woman of color + her white boyfriend.

some of it is Men Ignoring Writing Women nonsense, some of it is fanwork of media that's built on Men Ignoring Writing Women nonsense, some of it is an unconscious recreation of a gender dynamic that often exists in real life relationships, etc.

but i Also think there's something to the fandom side with, like. people having hesitations around fictional women that they don't around men. like i HAVE to take some of these things in good faith, and the good faith reading is: writing about men recovering from abuse is a safe, easy exploration of hard topics. meanwhile writing about women the same way feels Strange and Wrong and Uncomfortable because of the Femaleness of it all.

i truly don't know what can be done to combat this beyond writing more suffering women myself.... because it's not all that helpful to yell "EVERYONE IS A MISOGYNIST" (especially because tbh more often i find it's, like. woman writers who just. Don't Want To Think About That Shit) & i also can't Force people to want to write about women suffering horribly.

so i suppose i will end this on a joke instead:

Pleaseeeee Start Beating The Everloving Shit Out Of Female Characters. For Meeee.... 🥺🤲👉👈🙏🙏🙏