#luly rants in read more

[starberry-cupcake]

I’m gonna be honest for 2.5 seconds and delete this post when I feel ranting to the internet void has satisfied me. 

There’s been for years, in the body positive community, this idea of fatness in “comfortable” levels. There are these archetypes of “comfortable fatness” that are seen under a mostly positive light, if they fall under certain socially constructed categories which make them more “palatable” to the mainstream. They aren’t accepted, but they’re more comfortable for this mainstream to see. 

For example, back when this conversation started gaining traction, there was this trend of fatshionistas. Those among them who were rising to fame were always cis white able bodied women with a specific brand of feminine presentation, which included retro sundresses, corsets and other alternative-rockabilly fashions. Most often than not, these same models did a lot of lingerie photoshoots, burlesque photoshoots and nudes with that sort of alternative-retro flair, with a sensual/erotic charge. 

This doesn’t mean those bodies aren’t valid, this is not to undermine anyone who’s been in this category, it means that the idea of “acceptable fatness”, or of acceptable “attractive” fatness, started to be circumscribed to ideas of presentation and exposure that not all fat bodies were willing to fit into. Circa 2011 you could be closer to being accepted, beside all the thin girls in galaxy tanks and jean shorts on tumblr, if you fit this criteria, is what I mean.

Back in the day, when Meghan Trainor released All About That Bass, there was an uproar. Tumblr mostly argued the song under the idea that it was sexist, which it is, but they never mentioned that there have been, and continue to be, sexist songs by thin singers who never had as much backlash, even contemporary to Trainor’s. 

But behind most arguments, the same thing came popping back up: the song said “skinny bitches”. 

There was this massive backlash because of that single thing, more so than of the subject of internalized sexism and the male gaze as validation, to the point that a thin girl got viral making a cover where she replaced the song with an “all bodies” message. 

Because the body positive movement, which at its start had mostly talks about fatness and about differently abled bodies, needs to accommodate thin able bodied people in order to even speak. 

[I once got an anon, by the way, pitching Trainor and Mary Lambert against each other, because I made gifsets of Mary’s songs, while Meghan and Mary had been performing together, and whether or not you like Meghan Trainor, there’s room in the music industry for more than one singer who sings about not being thin, among other stuff. Just saying.] 

Now fast forward to Lizzo. 

I got to know about Lizzo a while back and I’ve been loving her ever since. Lizzo has spoken up about her music not being fat positive specifically, it’s positive to her and she’s a fat black woman, so whoever feels empowered, great, but it’s her identity the one portrayed in her music, as it should be, especially when it’s an identity that gets underrepresented. 

And Lizzo has a song with Missy Elliott where she says “skinny hoes”, and this time around, the reaction was different. 

Instead of demanding Lizzo to speak for “all bodies”, thin people, even fatphobic people, are using Lizzo as their “comfortable fatness” level. Lizzo is empowering and positive, Lizzo is powerful and beautiful. Lizzo is talented and valid. But it’s just her. And not even her as a person, her as an idea, as an icon for what’s useful for them. 

What Lizzo says about empowerment, they appropriate as long as it’s convenient to them, but they don’t translate it to the way they treat fat people irl, or the way they perceive fatness, even less the intersectional categorization of fatness and race. 

Lizzo’s words are empowering on a vacuum to them, not in application. Lizzo is safe to watch from afar and see her as valid and pretty and worthy of admiration because she’s “brave”, and she’s brave because she dares to be fat and proud. 

I see on the daily people in my life, people on twitter, people on here, waxing poetic about Lizzo while not acknowledging their fatphobic views or questioning themselves at all. Lizzo is out there making what she needs to feel good while thin cis girls on twitter demand her to lift their spirits and make them feel beautiful too, asking her to give them confidence.  

They are comfortable with Lizzo’s fatness because they only see the result of her body positive journey so far, but they are unwilling to acknowledge that, to get there, she and bodies and like hers had to fight against views propelled by people like them. 

Lizzo learned how to be confident despite bodies like theirs being upheld and worshiped and now they’re asking Lizzo for confidence tips, without understanding that the bodies they treat like crap on the daily are the ones Lizzo’s speaking about. 

Basically what I mean is miss me with your Lizzo appreciation if you’re unable to also appreciate the bodies of those around you which Lizzo’s art speaks for. 

[starberry-cupcake]

This website claims to be respectful and inclusive towards ace and aro people (and those in the spectrums) yet they use virginity and sex and being “single” as a weapon to wield against others and shame and humiliate. I also can’t stand dudebros and comments shredding their actions and attitudes to pieces give me life because sexist pigs are sexist pigs, but using concepts of sex and virginity or lack of romantic relationships as a weapon towards them is like calling them with homophobic slurs on purpose, it’s pulling us all down. There’s enough to say about them, enough material to read their petty discourse for filth, enough wrong with what they say to dismantle them with just a few words, without having to retort to keep prompting a discourse in which sexuality, romantic relationships and the “loss of virginity” (already a very questionable concept but ok) are things to humiliate people with. The double discourse in this webiste frustrates me a lot sometimes.