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lu-lus-dicks · 8 months ago

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@huskers-bar x @nunalastor chapter 3

Tags: enemies to lovers, angst?, eventual fluff, yearning?, soft huskers-bar, both mods are separate people, no beta we die like i do in this fic (not yet though), minor character death, ooc, au: hellaverse (hazbin hotel), nunalastor is head of the marketing department of the hazbin hotel (lucifer grabbed them randomly), jealousy?, huskers-bar is an employee at voxtek, lulu as a villain, lulu is a dog, huskers-bar is a liar, secret dating?

chapter: 3/? / chapter Word count: 1,659 / total word count: 4942

nunalastor as a single entity is nunalastor, traumatized mod dickmaster and cursed mod nun. and huskers-bar just husk/huskers. babygirl anon will be babygirl anon. I will be lulu. Angie will be angie but is meant to be read as angel dust.

A/N: peepee poopoo nunalastor lore drop uwu. thinking of removing the enemies to lovers tag on this because the plot has changed so much from what I originally planned. lulu is losing the funny so less funny stuff this chapter

As Huskers stood there, frozen in the doorway, their eyes widened with a mix of surprise and mild anxiety. They couldn't believe their luck-or was it misfortune?-to stumble upon them at a place like this. All the while Dickmaster kept staring at them with that unwavering gaze. One that could only belong to a cat that had too much catnip

"And who are you?" Dickmaster hissed, finger pointed directly at the huskers, their eyes narrowing and emitting an intense glare. "some kind of stalker?"

Huskers cleared their throat, trying to break the awkward tension they had accidentally created. If only this was a normal meeting. "Um, hey there! Fancy meeting you both here... I am not a stalker, actually. I work at voxtek and Angie, who I had to work with, informed me of the hotel and I liked the idea... didn't think I'd see you here" They choked on their words, offering a nervous smile while fidgeting with their fingers and displaying a toothy grin that seemed too wide to be genuine. They grabbed the hem of their shirt and started tugging excessively. Their hands felt way too sweaty.

"You're avoiding my question, who are you?" Dickmaster retorted, taking a step back and finding support on the nearest surface, which happened to be the bathroom door. Their eyes narrowed, radiating skepticism and cautiosness.

This was a once in a lifetime opportunity for huskers. Nunalastor genuinely didn't seem to know who they were, which why would they? It's funny to even think that. This meant Huskers had a golden ticket, a second chance. Maybe they'll get to know them and change their mind on hating them? It was in the realm of possibility. At least they hope so.

"oh just one of the anons" Huskers lied through their teeth, waving a hand awkwardly and dismissively. The nervous chuckle was the last cherry on the top for their fabrication. "Love your blog by the way" Huskers offered the compliment, attempting to salvage what was left of the already a horrifying first impression.

Dickmaster though, seemed to loosen up a bit after that answer, though still kept their guard up. One could never know about these things and it wouldn't be the first time their instincts were right.

"ah, there's too fuckin many of you... have some mercy on my lil ol askbox sometimes" They added, slipping back into their online persona. Brushing off imaginary dust from their attire and examining their hand closely, it became apparent that this was probably a nervous habit of some sort.

The atmosphere grew increasingly awkward, leaving Huskers unsure of how to continue the conversation. However, they couldn't just... give up. Their desire to get to know Nunalastor better was the reason behind hiding their identity after all.

"uhm yeah... what, are you even doing here?" Huskers asked, after an uncomfortably long minute of just staring at the wall directly behind Dickmaster. The lump in their throat was starting to annoy them and he was starting to sweat.

"None of your buisness, Stalker" Dickmaster retorted, instantly stiffening up in response to the questioning. Was this turning into an interrogation? how dare someone ask something about them! They are a private person damn it! What'll they ask for next? Their favorite color?! Disgusting

Huskers recoiled, taken aback by the response which felt way more aggressive than it needed to be. The fact that they had just been called a stalker didn't even register in their mind.

"oh sorry, uhm... I should just leave then huh?" huskers asked, gesturing back to where they had come from, their nervous smile faltering to a saddened but genuine expression.

The flushing of the toilet was a lot louder than it needed to be and so was the sound of the door slamming open. Finally, Nun had decided to leave the bathroom, with an emotionless stare towards Huskers. "you should" They said.

Dickmasters eyes sparkled with joy as they reached for the bathroom door. Finally, inner peace-except their mood was immediately spoiled as soon as Nun picked them up bridal style.

'We'll be leaving now" Nun said, not even sparing a glance in Huskers' direction. They turned and started heading towards the direction of their shared hotel room without a second glance.

"Right, see you later" Huskers waved a little dejected, definitely startled but what could he do? ... Besides, they'd probably get more opportunities to interact with them if they decided to stay at the hotel. Though it's back to square zero as it seems, or square negative one.

Dickmaster unapologetically sexily started squirming and thrashing in Nuns grip "what?! wait-Nun-HOLD ON I STILL NEED TO USE THE-"

"Pee on me instead" Nun didn't even hesitate

"i need to shit-"

"sorry, shit on me instead" Nun corrected themself before dissapearing behind their room.

Huskers stood there confused and kind of amused. "What the fuck?" They said, pulling out their phone. They just need to know. They had to kno. They opened nunalastors inbox, hit the anonymous switch and wrote out their question. Within moments, a ding went off on their phone

what are the mods relationship with eachother? - anon

lulu we know this is you - nunalastor

"What the fuck was that, Nun?" Dickmaster angrily shouted as soon as the hotel room door was locked behind them. Managing to wriggle free from Nun's grasp, Dickmaster regained their footing, assuming a stance that demanded attention and respect, one that was clearly not showing.

Nun immediately switched their usually nonchalant or sassy tone to a more serious one. Their eyes were understanding but nevertheless a little angry. Who wouldn't be in their shoes? The annoyance of the demand was very much palpable. "You know you can't be seen out in public like this!"

This response only served to further enrage Dickmaster. They deserved their personal space! They weren't a child! This overprotective behavior was getting out of hand and becoming too unbearable.

"But Nun," Dickmaster began to explain, their voice a mix of frustration and determination, "they were here seeking redemption, I'm sure it's—"

"they could be another one of those stalkers! not like it hasn't happened before!" Nun interrupted, their voice filled with a mixture of frustration and caution. They knew all too well that encounters with obnoxious fans were not pleasant ones, especially considering they were in hell. It didn't even stop when they were out for snacks once in a blue moon. They never wanted a repeat of that incident with that crazy one, Lulu or whatever the fuck his name was, something stupid like that.

Dickmaster though was not budging. Despite the awkward tension of the encounter with huskers, they didn't think the anon was any danger to them. Either of them. Their gut feelings were always trustworthy "They didn't seem like it, they said they worked at voxtek and that Angie invited them, they wouldn't be here if not for Angie"

"That doesn't prove anything," Nun countered, equally stubborn, refusing to give an inch and provide Dickmaster with even a sliver of space. They were aware of how annoying and frustrating their protective stance might be, but their conscience simply wouldn't allow them to come to any form of harm.

This disagreement triggered a hissing fit from Dickmaster, who refused to accept Nun's ridiculous behavior. It had been a month since the last extermination and since Nun had started acting overly protective. Dickmaster paced back and forth in the room, desperately trying to channel their frustration into anything other than punching the nearest wall. "IT SHOULD! I can't be monitored like a hawk! this is ridiculous!"

Nun grumbled, fully aware that this confrontation was inevitable. It was time to employ their ultimate weapon. They put on their most sexiest face, placing a hand on Dickmaster's shoulder and attempting to physically ease the tension. "Sorry, babygirl. Let me apologize with my tongue."

"no" oh no. It's worse than Nun thought.

Nun took a deep breath and let it out, now it was time to get serious, as much as they despised doing so. They locked eyes with Dickmaster, offering the most sincere expression they could muster. Their voice adopted a soft, low, and soothing tone, oozing with genuine concern. "listen, dickmaster, you know I'm just looking out for you right?"

"Maybe" Dickmaster avoided looking at Nuns eyes, they were angry and Nuns eyes were the last thing they wanted to see. Instead, their eyes found comfort in the apartment floorings unusual patterns, refusing to look up.

Nun didn't like that, but didn't try to force it. "And that I want what's best for you?"

Dickmaster scrunched up their nose, not even hesitating with their response. "Debatable, considering you—"

"Please!" Nun interjected, their grip on Dickmaster's shoulder tightening as they cut off their sentence. They didn't need a reminder of what they did. "please, let me get your soul back for you first, let me make it up to you and then I can leave you alone, promise"

Dickmaster was in a whirlwind of thoughts, most of them screaming to slam them against the nearest wall and feed them worms but that was besides the point

"not like you're giving me a choice" Dickmaster very reluctantly gave in, clearly not happy about it, not one bit. They crossed their arms and put some physical distance between them. "fine."

Nun decided not to push further. A heavy sigh sounded throughout the room. "Thank you." Nun finished, finally happy they got through. They opened up their ask box and started answering more headcanons as a distraction.

Back at the hotel, a sinner, looking a little too much like an imp sits at the stairs of the entrance of the hotel, humming a tune to himself. A pair of footsteps could be heard behind him, along with that of a cane, commonly mistaken for a dildo.

"Ah. Lulu my dear, what brings you here this lovely evening?"

#I DID IT #I WROTE THIS IN UNDER 4 HOURS #I am going insane in the best ways rn #eat up because this is as much as a serious fic ya'll getting from me #tune in next time for lulu being a piece of shit #nunwhiskers #lulu is delulu #lulu is feral #huskers-bar x nunalastor

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lu-lus-dicks · 9 months ago

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Hi, here's about me and some questions you might have!

Updated: april 26th 2024

MINORS DNI please

Important!! Please don't use real money to do things for me in any capacity. It makes me uneasy, uncomfortable and puts a lot of pressure on me. Thank you for your understanding <3 also Important: I can not and will not take anything seriously, if you want to say something serious to me, send me a DM, I'm more likely to respond seriously there

Who are you?

@ nunalastor's emotional support white boy™

People just call me lulu on here. I'm 20 and go by any pronouns. AFAB (and cis). my gender is whatever makes you gay. somewhere on the ace spectrum.

Also CEO of forcing people to get some fucking sleep!

important note: I respond in the horniest ways to @ nunalastorscursedkitten, but they have explicitly stated they don't want sexual stuff directed towards them without their consent. I have confirmed that they are okay with me responding in a horny way and you should make sure before doing it too

tags (will not sort these out at all):

who is safe here?

lulu is delulu - my posts

babygirl anon fest - asks specifically from babygirl

revoke lulu's art license - my art stuff

nunwhiskers - the ship of nunalastor x huskers-bar

lulu is feral - reblogs where I am feral

lulus nun reblogs - I just tend to reblog everything of nunalastors so it's a tag now

lulu reblogs - art/theories/incorrect quotes ect

lulu convos - me interracting with peeps here

lulu crooks - going into detail about things i shouldn't be going into detail of. (maybe infodumping)

cursed polycule - me and the 100+ husbands/wives interracting (xxx-angie list in their pinned)

lulu asks - me answering asks

this is a nunalastor simp blog - anytime I openly bark for nunalastor

lulu lore - me accidentally dropping irl lulu lore

lulu fun facts - exactly what it says

lulu polls - polls

lulu is a boomer - me not knowing basic pop culture things cuz I live under a rock

lulu loves nunalastorscursedkitten / and paincaat too / lulu loves paincaat / and nunalastorscursedkitten too - my interractions with @ paincaat / @ nunalastorscursedkitten

lulu loves getting called slurs - me getting called the f-word

lulu infodumps - infodumps about stuff that might not always be hazbin hotel

fools being sexy - @ the-aprilfools-bitch tag

everyone except minors. I don't judge. This is a safe space regardless of race, gender, sexuality or anything else. Be as cringe/not cringe as you want

What is this blog?

Used to be a hazbin blog, now turned to me simping for daddy nunalastor and interracting with the cursed polycule

What can I ask or share with you?

Literally anything you want to share, no limits. I respond to everything, even hate so if I haven't responded I'm either asleep or the message didn't appear in my inbox.

One thing I don't respond to is chain sends cuz I can't be bothered with that shit. Anything else is a yes

What's with the bad English?

English is my second language. I pride myself on being able to read it fluently, but I might have problems with talking in a way that flows naturally to native speakers. So sorry bout that

What time are you active?

Honestly, all over the place. Don't look too much into it, but I'm from the country of Georgia if that helps

Can I use your ideas?

Absolutely! You don't even need to ask. I won't say this is a necessity, but If you decide to use them, I'd love it if you'd tag me. I love seeing all kinds of things people make and I'd love to see yours too!

Why are you so unhinged and sexual? Aren't you ace?

Asexuals aren't all sex-repulssed and can enjoy it too. I am uncomfy with the act of sex but I love joking and shitting about it. Me saying something is hot/sexy/makes my dick hard is just me saying "I love this and i think it's cool" when that isn't enough to express my love. (I think I'm being funny)

Is the art on nunalastor's blog you sometimes repost yours?

Yes, the art posted on their asks by mylz-flick is by me. It's my primary blog and i don't use it for anything so all my asks are submitted through there

Why don't you post as often anymore?

Because all my posts go straight to nunalastor's blog. Go check them out, it's great

By nunalastor s request:

Who hurt you?

Nunalastor did when they rizzed up my mom

What's with the worms? That's disgusting

Well, nunalastor made this post and it turned me on a little ngl

What is the cursed polycule?

Well, I spontaneously decided that my go to funny (not funny) joke would be to start asking everyone who agreed with me or had similar tastes to kiss me. Long story short, now I'm a whore™ with 100+ husbands that I can't keep track of and that's the cursed polycule

Why do you keep calling nunalastor daddy?

Many reasons. First, Nunalastor saying they would fuck my mom in the DMs when I told them about her. So naturally, if my mom and nunalastor got married they would be the dad hence, daddy. Also, nunalastor is unapologetically my favourite blog on here and the title "daddy" is reserved for them. Also their word is law to me and they deserve the respectful title

The way you interract with minors is disgusting

I have minors please don't interract in my bio for a reason. I expect a decent human being to see that and kindly leave my blog. I don't check who I'm responding to most of the time so I probably didn't even notice it was a minor. I'm just trying to be fun.

If you are a minor and I responded/reblogged your art or post with some batshit crazy shenanigans like I do with everyone, send me a DM and I'll delete it. I'd rather it be in the DMs instead of out in public because out here I have people acting like they hate me and I don't want to accidentally take something that's meant to be a serious request to stop like a joke.

What's with that one pregnant anon stuff at nunalastors blog?

Listen, I don't care what shit people send me, but if you even dare harm, harass or just in general be an asshole to the ones I consider nice people, I will not take that lightly.

To everyone: if you get haters, tag me so I can draw them pregnant.

Is the cursed polycule an actual relationship or just a joke?

It's just a joke between us.

Can I join the polycule?

Daddy has revoked my marriage license so you'll have to consult with the other members. I take what daddy demands very seriously

You can however, talk to the other members of the polycule and join. We could also have a platonic relationship going on in the polycule if you want

What is up with you and pronouns?

Sorry, in my native language there are no gendered pronouns. We just have a singular he/she/they for everyone. I use he/him for me (despite being a woman) because it's what rolls off the tongue easier for me. For everyone else I use they/them because you can never go wrong with neutral.

Are you actually attracted to nunalastor?

Why do you keep mentioning nunalastor calling you the f-word?

No. It's me and paincaat my beloved. They say gay shit to me and I find that hot

Because I genuinely /gen /srs loved it. This isn't a joke. It made me overstimmed and honestly was a little overwhelmed with giddiness. keep in mind though, that while I enjoy getting called the slur, I will not be calling anyone that because that makes me uncomfy.

why haven't you responded to my reblog/comment/ask?

I generally respond to everyone I can. but either it was

lost in my notifs

was posted by a minor and I don't want to attract minors here

If it was on a reblog of something, I assumed it was meant for op

I just couldn't think of anything to respond with (which is rare)

feel free to let me know if it was either 1 or 3 but I won't respond to minors

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