#luckily everything ended up alright and he didnt had to spend the whole night in there but you know. the trauma was now there

[prrplwtch]

mc ends up killing a person (whether human or demon, premediated or self defense its up to you). but then someone walks in on mc. they have not hidden the body yet and await the person's reaction. will they help? pretend they didnt see anything? take them to diavolo? (hcs for the boys' reaction)

Hi nonny :) Ooh, such an exciting ask. I think I’ll go with MC that killed a demon (since Solomon is the only other human in Devildom, and I’d really rather the poor boy not die) by accident or in self defense 💜

So the tally thus far is: 

Tell Diavolo: Lucifer (though not the whole truth)

Help hide body: Mammon, Levi, Satan and Beel

Pretend they did not see anything aka not help: Asmo, Belphi

Lucifer: 

When Lucifer walks into an empty classroom, the last things he expects to see is MC covered in demon blood with a dead demon laying on the floor. Yet that is exactly what he sees. 

“What happened here?” Lucifer asks, seeing MC’s teary eyed face. 

The explanation is as stupid as it is surprising - MC accidentally sprayed the demon with her perfume that she brought from the human world. As it turned out, the perfume ingredients are lethal for demons.

Lucifer takes out a handkerchief and confiscates MC’s perfume - he needs to get rid of it before more damage is done. 

MC is freaking out, saying she should go straight to Diablo and confess, so that she can be punished. 

“Punished for what?” Lucifer asks as he looks at her, “He tried to attack you, and you defended yourself with what you had on hand, which by chance ended up being lethal to demons. There is nothing to punish you for.”

It is clear that takes MC a moment to understand what he is saying. 

Lucifer knows that the decision he made is best for everyone - after all, there was nothing important about this low-level demon, and Diablo hopes so bad that the exchange program goes well that Lucifer cannot let him down. 

And if reporting to Diablo that it was self-defense would ensure that MC does not get punished - well, who needs to know that that is why Lucifer chose exactly this cover story. 

Mammon:

Mammon is woken up in the middle night by MC. 

“What ya doin’ here?” Mammon asks, wondering if it’s another one of those dreams. Turns out it isn’t - and he realizes that when he sees MC’s wide-open, scared eyes, and sees that there is blood on her clothes.

“Are you alright, MC? Don’t ya die on me,” he says.

When MC explains that it is not her blood, he breathes out a sigh of relief. When she explains that she was out for a breath of fresh air when she was attacked by a lower demon, he gets angry at himself for not being there for her. 

“What do we do now?” MC asks, despair clear in her voice, “Should we tell Lucifer? Should we tell Diablo? Oh what will happen...”

“We will do the only logical thing in this situation,” Mammon says after momentary contemplation, “We will hide the body.”

Luckily for MC, Mammon knows plenty of hiding places in Devildom - some of them so concealed that no one would ever find the body in there. 

MC tries to argue, saying she should confess, but Mammon insists that his plan is best. He doesn’t think Lucifer or Diablo will punish her for self defense, but he does not want to take any chances when it comes to MC and her safety. 

Leviathan:

Leviathan is surprised, when MC runs into his room, clearly distressed. 

“Wh-what happened?” he asks, as he looks at her. 

As it turned out, when she was opening window in her room a part of the window sill came off and fell right atop some demon that was passing by outside House of Lamentation. 

Oh, this is just like in those outrageous dark comedy animes, Levi thinks to himself. Apparently, the thought made him smile, as the next moment MC asked him in a horrified tone about why he is smiling at someone being dead. 

“We should check if he is actually dead,” Levi suggests - in plenty of the animes he is thinking about the victim of such an incident might actually be alive. 

As it turns out yet again to Levi’s disappointment, real life is no anime, and the lower level demon lying by the walls of House of Lamentation is actually dead. 

“Should we do something? Should we tell Lucifer?” MC asks, making Levi think. They could always tell Lucifer - but then he would make them answer questions, and Levi’s show that he desperately needs to watch is starting in less than two hours. So he makes the decision.

“No - no one will even notice he is gone - and I have just the perfect idea of what to do with the body.”

The demon is heavy, but carrying him together is not so bad, and, luckily, the ocean is just about a twenty minute walk away. Lotan, the seven-headed sea monster, is grateful for the fresh snack, and Levi feels happy with himself. He solved the situation so masterfully, just like those anime characters. 

Satan:

Satan is enjoying a quiet afternoon in the Devildom library (it’s Friday, so he is like the only one there, when suddenly he hears a yelp, and then a thud. 

Annoyed by the disturbance, he goes to the sound, only to find MC holding a small knife and a dead demon at her feet. 

“What in the...” is all he can manage. MC looks pale and terrified, and it takes her a moment to speak, but when she does, his heart fills with anger - it turned out the demon was stalking MC and went into the library after her. When she tried to get away grabbed her, so she had to stab him in self defense. As it turned out, fatally. 

“What am I going to do?” MC exclaims. 

Satan knows that they could probably go to Lucifer to explain the situation, but the last thing he wants is Lucifer’s help. And besides, if they do go to Lucifer, that would waste the perfect opportunity to use all the knowledge he picked up from the detective series about how to hide the body. 

MC is in shock so she does not really argue, and Satan is delighted -finally he can put his knowledge to task. 

It does not take them very long to clean up all the blood in the library and also to deal with the body. Satan is pleased with his handy work - no one will ever find the body, because there is no more body to be found. 

Satan ends up spending quite a bit of time in the following weeks watching over MC to make sure that she was ok after the incident. 

Asmodeus:

When MC comes to Asmo all stressed, telling him about how she accidentally stabbed a demon to death, he cannot help but be amused. 

“You are so adorable when you are clumsy,“ he tells her as he blows at his freshly painted nails.

MC asks him to go with her to check if demon is still alive, and Asmo follows her. The demon is sprawled out on the ground, clearly dead. 

“Well, it’s not like anyone will mis him anyway,” Asmo says as he turns the demon’s face to the side with the front of his shoe, careful not to get any blood on it. The demon is one of the lower ones - and there are plenty of those in Devildom. 

“What do I do?” MC panics, and Asmo pauses, thinking before suggesting dumping the body in the pit not far from the House of Lamentation. 

“What’s in the pit?” MC asks neverously. 

“Just some ancient spirits of darkness, that love nothing better than fresh flesh,” Asmo tells her, shaking his hands - his nails are not drying fast enough. 

MC nods, then picks up the demon’s arms and looks at Asmo’s expectantly. 

“Are you not going to help me?” she asks.

“Me?” Asmo asks, “Sorry, darling, but I have just painted my nails - wouldn’t want to ruin him. Besides, I have already helped you with the great idea. Good luck.”

Beelzebub:

Beel has never expected someone as nice as MC to kill someone, even if it was by accident, so he is a little shocked when MC approaches him with her little problem. 

Nonetheless, she is clearly distressed, and Beel cares a lot about her, so he wants to help. 

“Where is the body now?” he asks, and follows MC to some bushes to which she says she dragged off the demon’s body so that no one would notice it. 

Beel first checks if the demon is truly dead - and it turns out he is. 

MC is pale and panicking, wondering out loud if she should go and confess everything to Lucifer, and for a moment Beel thinks that it might not be the most terrible idea. That is, until he remembers just how harsh Lucifer’s punishment can be. He does not want MC to be punsihed. 

“There is no need to bother Lucifer with this,” Beel tells her, “We can simply toss him off the cliff of despair - no one will find him.”

MC seems reluctant and nervous at first, as if she is close to crying. Beel pulls her into a quick hug in order to calm her down and that seems to do the trick. 

She wants to help him carry the body - but he can lift the dead demon easily and does not need help. 

He wants MC to go to her room so she can rest, but she insists on accompanying him. He does not mind - though disposing of the body is not the most pleasant of tasks, anything is made better by her presence.

Belphegor: 

Belphie is really mad when MC wakes him up from his nap only to tell him that she accidentally killed some demon. 

“You did? So what,” is Belphie’s reaction - it’s not like he had never killed another demon, and all of his brothers definitely have. 

MC, however, looks completely distressed, and though Belphie wants nothing more than to turn to the other side of the bed and sleep, he sits up on the bed. 

“Listen, we’ve all killed other demons before,” he tells her, “It’s not that big a deal.”

“But what do I do now?” MC asks and Belphie sighs. Humans.

“Well there are a few things - you can always go confess to Lucifer, although, in your shoes, I would not. There are plenty of places to hide body in Devildom, after all.”

MC seems to ponder his words. Her face hardens, as she gets up from bed and walks over to the door. As she opens the door she looks back at him. 

“Are you going to help me?” she asks, as Belphie sinks into his pillow. 

“I think I already did,” Belphie says, “Besides, you are one grown human, you can manage.”

[only-the-lou]

party night

Sooo turns out that i didnt fully finish my last story! Sooo here’s my attempt into putting the whole thing here :)

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It was the end of finals week, and Peter couldn't be more happy. He had spent the last 2 weeks pulling all nighters cramming as much information as he could into his brain so that he could pass his tests. Sure he was really smart and he didn't really need to study, but that didn't stop Peter from worrying about failing one of his classes. But now that all that was over, he couldn't wait to just relax. He can finally get some decent hours of sleep, actually eat something healthy, and take care of himself. He had decided to call work off for the next two days, and was determined to sleep as much as he could because right now he looked like death, with his pale skin and eye bags so heavy you could put groceries in them. He knew he looked horrible, but he also knew that if he didn't get good grades he could get his scholarships taken away. He only had one more year of high school though, and then he wouldn't have to worry about this stuff for a while, So right now he would work his ass off so that he can have a good life in the future.

It was around 8 at night when Peter heard knocking on his apartment door. He was slightly confused, since he didn't remember inviting anyone over, and his food was already delivered. He put his phone down and walked over to the entrance, not having a chance to fully open his door before MJ and Ned busted right in.

"What 's up loser?" MJ said. She walked last Peter and into the kitchen, and helped herself into Peter's fridge. Ned walked in behind her and sat down onto his couch.

"Hey guys! What are you doing here?" Peter questioned. He wasn't expecting the two, but he also wasn't surprised that they showed up unannounced since they did that often. He closed his door and locked it before he made his way to the living room. He walked to his couch and plopped down next to ned and pulled out his phone.

"Well, it's a Saturday night, you have nothing to do, and there's a party over at Liz's house. So me and Ned decided to come pick you up so that we can have some fun!" MJ explained. She was currently opening up bag of Doritos and had decided to look for a soda.

"A party? Since when do you like going to parties?" Peter asked. MJ was usually the type to stay home and watch Netflix or read. Parties weren't her thing, so Peter was confused when she decided to go to one.

"Well, it is our last year before graduation and our last chance to relax before the second rounds of finals!" Ned chimed. He wasn't wrong, it was their senior year in highschiol and this was going to be their last week before they had to bury themselves in books and cry about life. MJ nodded, and Peter decided that this was going to be his way of taking care of himself.

"Alright. Lemme get ready and I'll meet you guys downstairs" Ned squealed and MJ high fived Peter. They walked out of Peter's apartment while Peter walked towards his room already planning out the night.

-

30 minutes later Peter rushed out of his apartment and ran down the stairs to meet his friends. He had decided on some torn black skinny jeans (that made his booty look bigger) and a plain white button up. He usually didn't wear makeup, but he had decided to leave his insecurities behind and did some light eyeliner with mascara and some lipgloss. He couldn't lie, he felt good about himself, something that was very rare. Just as he was going to leave the apartment he decided to bring his lighter and some blunts he was planning on smoking earlier and made sure that he had everything he needed before heading out.

Just as he was in his last set of stairs he heard MJ whistle and Ned compliment his eyeliner. He smiled and blew a kiss towards Ned and winked. MJ was on her phone texting Liz and letting her know that they were on their way while walking towards her car.

"Actually, do you guys mind if we walk? Her house isn't even far away. Plus, we can smoke on the way there." Peter asked. MJ and Ned nodded, and Peter pulled out a blunt and his lighter from his back pocket. He didn't usually smoke, and neither did the other two, but fuck it, tonight was all about having fun.

The trio decided to smoke as they walked to Liz's house, so they arrived there quicker. The music was so loud you could probably hear it blocks away, and by the time Peter had reached the house he could feel the music's vibrations in his chest. He liked it though, the familiar feeling of excitement coursing through his veins. The front lawn was filled with teenagers holding red cups, couples making out, and those people who partied a little too hard and passed out. Peter chuckled as he looked at them. Lightweights. The house itself was actually quite beautiful. It was big, with three pillars on the front and with 8 rectangular windows on the front part. It was a creamy white, looking homey if it wasn't for the blasting music and the lights inside.

The three were almost done with the 5th blunt and Peter tossed it to the floor and stepped on it to put it out. He could feel the drug start to take its effects, and so when he turned to see his friends he felt like laughing. The other two where getting high as well, so they also started giggling.

They walked in and were hit with the smell of beer, weed, and sweat. They didn't care though, too busy trying to go through the crowds of people to notice. Peter looked around to see if he knew anyone, and quickly noticed two guys whom he was sure didn't go to his school because no one was that hot in queens bay high. Peter sucked in a breath as he checked them out, too stunned but their beauty to notice Ned pulling his arm to walk. He practically got dragged to the kitchen by his friend, and when he looked back the pair were already lost.

"Damm it Ned, I was checking out two- oh hey Liz!" Peter smiled, forgetting about the two boys back there and He leaned in for a hug and kissed her on the cheek. Liz giggled and hugged him back, and fixed her dress.

"Hi guys! Glad you could make it. Theres snacks right over there and some beers! Make yourself at home babes!" She smiled. Peter looked at her outfit, wearing a red dress that went down to her knees and some black heels. She looked beautiful, and even though Peter was really gay, he would still date her. Ned hugged her and went directly into the snack table, and MJ quickly followed. She was too shy to hug her, although she was been crushing on Liz for the longest time. It was quite adorable Peter though, MJ being so bold around anyone but as soon as she sees Liz she completely melts. They would be a really cute couple, if it weren't for MJ's awkwardness around her.

He talked to Liz for a couple of minutes before hugging her again and walking towards the drinking section. He has decided on some vodka, and grabbed a soda to mix it with. He walked over to his two friends and leaned against the fridge.

"So, what's the plan?" Peter asked. Ned shrugged and MJ kept eating some chips, and Peter realized that their idea of a party was to stay near the snack area. He shook his head and smiled, telling them that he was gonna go out and dance.

"If you're gonna get fucked someone don't forget to use protection!" Ned hollered. Peter laughed and told him 'no promises!' knowing that he was going to use it. He wasn't planning on catching an STD, and even though it didn't feels as good, he didn't wanna get infected.

He walked around the crowds of people and bumped into a much taller male. Luckily he didn't drop his drink, or else it would've caused Peter to go of on the other person. He looked up to see who it was, and to his luck it was one of the guys who he was checking out earlier. He was tall and had shoulder length hair which holy shit made him look more hotter and was wearing all black.

"S-sorry I wasn't looking where I was going" Peter stuttered. The other male chuckled and Peter felt like he died right there. He was usually confident and bold, but that clearly went away when he saw the taller male. Must've been the alcohol, or the weed, or both.

"It's okay princess, no need to apologize. I'm Bucky by the way." Bucky extended his hand towards Peter, and it took a second for him to register what was going on, but quickly shook Buckys hand. The size difference in their hands was huge, making Peter feel smaller, and blushed. "I'm Peter. You don't go to queen bay right ?" He asked. Bucky shook his head and explained to him that his friend Tony was invited to this party and practically dragged him here. So that's the other guys name.

"And uh, what about you?" Bucky asked. Peter told him how he was going to spend the night with his two other friends, but they decided that food was more important. Bucky chuckled and Peter died yet again, suddenly aware that he was in heaven and Bucky was an angel leading him to the paradise because there is no way someone so perfect could exist. That's what he had thought until Buckys friend, Tony walked up to them and smiled at Peter. Peter smiled back and tried so say something, but was too scared that he was going to sound pathetic. He looked at Tony's outfit, similar to Bucky but instead of a leather jacket he was wearing a blue jean jacket with a white shirt and black jeans. Both of them looked so handsomely good, and Peter decided right then and there that he wanted both of them.

Peter was now very sure that he was high and drunk as shit, because his normal self would never dance on a guy (let alone 2) like he was doing right now, His dignity flying out the window as soon as he turned around and started moving his ass in front of Tony. He still didn't care when Tony grabbed his hips to close the gap between his crotch and Peter ass, and he didn't care when Bucky was in front of Peter and started kissing his neck. He didn't give two flying shits, too focused on trying not to moan when Bucky started biting his neck. He moved his hand to Buckys neck and tangled his fingers in his neck, softly gripping it whenever Bucky started sucking at his neck.

Peter didn't really remember how or when he ended up in a bedroom, or if he even was in the same house as before. All he remembered was dancing with Tony and partially making out with Bucky, and then he ended up in here. Not that he was complaining, because he really fucking wasn't, but he was just caught off guard. He suddenly stopped thinking about that when he felt Tony's lips against his own, somehow rough and gentle at the same time. He bit Peter's bottom lip, and Peter couldn't help but groan. He was suddenly aware that he was on top of Tony, his legs on either side of him p, with Tony's hands grasping on his hips, pushing him down to rock on Tony's crotch. The both of them groaned at the same time, getting pleasure from the friction. He decided to do it again, rolling his hips against Tony's, closing his eyes and throwing his head back.

He didn't see how Bucky was looking at both of them from the doorframe, and didn't hear when he closed the door and locked it. He slowly made his way to the bed, and decided to get in on the action.

He saw Bucky laying on the bed, and he kissed tony one last time while getting off his lap, crawling towards Bucky, and got on top of him. He leaned down to kiss Bucky, running his hands down Buckys chest. Bucky then broke the kiss, and flipped them over so that he was on top, and started taking his shirt off. Suddenly Peter noticed that the three of them were fully dressed, and starting taking off his shirt too. He couldn't really see Tony, but he hoped that he was getting undressed as well. Once Bucky and Peter were just in boxers, Bucky leaned back down and started kissing peters neck. He found peters sweet spot and Peter big his lip to not let out a moan.

"You sure you wanna do this ?" Bucky asked. "You don't have to if you don't want, babe." Tony said. And although Peter wasn't sure if it was him or the alcohol speaking, Peter looked at both of the innocently and bit his lip. He saw how Buckys eyes flickered over to his lips and smirked, and he knew he was in for a long, fun night.

—

So there you go! Sorry it's really bad :( I'm not the most experienced writer haha 😃

[lovelyshawnn]

Boxer!Shawn (Part 2)

Part 1 // Part 3

The sunlight beamed through your curtains and created a soft glow around your room that eventually pulled you from your deep slumber. Your eyes peeled open, blinking away the traces of sleep as you take in your surroundings. You noticed the blood stained tissues that laid inside your small trash bin, which gave you flash backs from the events that occured last night. Holy shit, that was real? Shawn Mendes was really in your room, sitting on your bed? You remembered how vulnerable he looked beneath you, something that he was clearly not used to. He was always superior, always winning. To succumb to someone and allow them to take care of him just wasn’t in his nature. He was used to being on his own and taking care of himself.

Your thoughts were interrupted my the sound of keys jingling by the door before Emma walked in with her boyfriend, Brian. Brian and Emma have been dating for roughly two months, but you could tell that they were already madly in love with each other just by the way they looked at each other. You really liked Brian, he was the definition of a nice guy, and he genuinely liked Emma for who she is. He volunteers at the animal shelter, gets good grades, and is a proper gentleman towards Emma. He made Emma happy, which also made you happy for her.

“Is it true?” Emma urged, excitedly jumping onto your bed, “Did you bring Shawn back to our room last night?”

You furrowed your eyebrows in confusion. “Where did you hear that?”

“So it is true! Sophie from my economics class told me she saw you two walking in here together,” Emma said, wiggling her eyebrows suggestively. You let out a frustrated groan before shoving your face into your pillow. Of course girls were already starting to talk, it was Shawn that you were with after all. Great.

“Wait, Shawn as in my roomate Shawn?” Brian intervened from the other side of the room. One of your eyes peaked out from under your pillow. “Shawn is your roomate?” You and Emma said in unison, with an equal amount of surprise. “How did I not know this?!” Emma exclaimed. “Babe, what do you mean? I told you my roomate was Shawn! Besides, he’s never home when you come over,” Brian retaliated. “I thought you meant Shawn Henderson, not Shawn Mendes,” Emma replied. We were all collectively hit with realization at the same time, muttering an “Oooooh, that makes sense,” before Emma spoke up again.

“So?! Are you gonna tell me everything that happened?” You rolled your eyes and hopped out of bed to get ready for class. “Nothing happened, I just helped him clean his wound. That’s all,” you said, not sure if you were saying it to convince Emma or to convince yourself. Luckily, she dropped the subject at that and allowed you to leave for your biology class that was starting soon.

~

Your eyes were glued to the entrance door, nervously awaiting for Shawn’s arrival. You didn’t know why you felt this way, he’s never had this kind of effect on you before. The professor started the lecture, but you still caught yourself glancing to the door every now and then, hoping he would come bursting in. Before you knew it, class ended and there was still no sign of Shawn in sight. Just last night, he said he was gonna see you tomorrow. He never did. In fact, you didn’t see him at all for the next two days and you were starting to wonder if he was avoiding you. You debated on storming to his shared apartment with Brian and demanding answers, but decided against it. He’ll come to you when he was ready, and you were willing to wait.

The next time that you saw him in class, his wound shrunk in half and he acted like that night didn’t even happen. Maybe you were just over analyzing everything and that night really did mean nothing, so you brushed it off and went about your life. Once class ended, you walked up to him to ask, “Library at 6 tonight?”

He smirked, slinging his bag over his shoulder before replying, “Of course, honey.” He walked away before you could say anything. You scoffed at that damn nick name that made you weak in the knees, but you were kinda happy to see that he was okay and back to his old self.

~

You pushed open the doors to the library on campus, walking in and finding a seat in the back of the room. Shawn was late, as per usual. He strolled in 10 minutes later with his head held up high. He made eye contact with you and began walking towards your designated study desk. On the way there, he had to have winked at at least two different girls, earning an eye roll from you. “Hey,” he stated, taking his backpack off and sitting on the chair in front of you. “You look good today.” he stated as he leaned back in his chair, arms stretching as he entwined his hands on the back of his head. The position he was in perfectly displayed his ripped muscles. You scoffed,”Is that what you say to every girl?”

He smiled smugly at your snarky response, enjoying the annoyed reactions you always gave him. It was refreshing and humbling to him to have a girl not swoon at his every word once in awhile. “Only the really cute ones,” He replied with a wink while watching your face become a bright shade of pink.

A whole hour flied by and you were actually impressed by the amount of work you two finished and how he held back from flirting with you the entire time. “Alright, lets call it a day,” you said tiredly as you packed up your stuff. He nodded and followed your actions, putting his laptop into his backpack. You turned around to walk towards your room and the bed that you so desperately wanted to be sleeping in right now, when you felt a large hand grasp on to your wrist. You looked down to see Shawn’s hand and admired his beautiful bird tattoo. “Can I have your number, baby?”

You raised an eyebrow, looking at him suspiciously and being cautious of what his intentions were. He noticed your uneasy reaction and quickly followed up on his question, “‘s just for the project, darling.” You nodded in agreement and typed your number into his phone. As you handed him his phone back, you could’ve sworn you almost saw him smile genuinely. Not a smirk, not a smug smile full of mischief, but a genuine smile. However, that smile only lasted for a fraction of a second, his facial expression quickly going back to the hard stern that he always wore. He mumbled a thanks before exiting the library.

Exchanging numbers eventually led to more texts and more talking and more library sessions. This allowed you to get to know him better, sorta. You gave more than you received. Shawn knew lots about you, whereas you could barely pry open Shawn enough to know his favorite color. You respected this, you knew of his reputation of not letting anyone close to him. But you couldn’t help yourself wanting to know more about him, wanting to spend more time with him. You were attracted to his mysterious characteristics. It was the last week before your big project was due, and you were slightly sad because that meant you didn’t have an excuse to see Shawn every other day, but you tried not to think about it because you were in denial. You weren’t catching feelings. You weren’t getting overly attached. You guys are friends. Just friends.

Before going to bed, you texted him to confirm the next library session date to finish up the project.

To: Shawn

Same time tomorrow?

From: Shawn

Sorry, honey. Not tomorrow.

The dryness in his text was upsetting, but not surprising. You thought nothing of it, dozing off and falling asleep in bed. Little did you know, the reason he wasn’t available to properly text you back was because he was training for a boxing match against Drake Henderson tomorrow.

A/N: hi this is kinda short but i wanted to leave if on somewhat of a cliffhanger bc its leading up to something!! ik the story feels kinda slow but dw things will start actually happening soon HAHA ty for reading and ty for the feedback!! i def didnt expect this many notes on these imagines haha

[lentils-writes]

Day 12: Arranged marriage AU with this prompt that I found: 

okay but like two friends getting married for cheaper tution like hah we are geniuses this is a fool proof plan and we are completely platonic everything is fine haha i didnt just notice how beautiful your eyes are and how soft your hair feels LOVING THIS CHEAPER TUITION EVERYTHING IS FINE

(I am SO SORRY this is late I got very carried away I like pining ok)

Kara checks her phone on the bus home and, of course, there’s a text from Melinda. That’s not weird; they text each other every day. What is weird is that it’s just a link to an article and the headline is “Get Married, Save Thousands on Tuition.”

Kara opens the article, skims it, and then replies.

??? what do u mean by this article???

I think it’s pretty self-explanatory.

it’s rly not

explain pls

Well, we both got into U of C, right?

yeah...

But I’m a California resident and you’re not. You’ll gonna be paying an extra twenty grand since you’re out-of-state. If we get legally married, you’ll count as a resident.

Kara feels her face getting hot and glances around to make sure no one is looking at her.

UM

what r u saying

It wouldn’t be a real marriage, calm down. Just so we get tax breaks and lower tuition. I think we could even qualify for the family housing if we’re lucky. It’s way cheaper than the dorms.

wow ur moving kinda fast there

we haven’t even gone on a real date :P

Hey, I took you to see Jupiter Ascending when you were here during winter break last year!

i don’t think that counts

we got kicked out

YOU got us kicked out for laughing too loud!

Anyway, sorry if this is weird. We don’t have to if you don’t want to. I just thought it might be funny.

it is pretty funny

i gotta think about it tho

No worries. Practice starting, bye

Kara stares at her phone for a long moment, thinking. It’s not that she cares that much about marriage or thinks of it as this super important sacred symbol of love or anything. It’s something she’s thought a little more about since New Mexico legalized it when she was a freshman, and then again since the Supreme Court decision last year, but she’s in high school. The idea of falling in love and getting married is so far from her reality that she almost can’t imagine it.

Plus, it’s Melinda. Melinda is the most important person in her life - ever since they met three years ago on Tumblr, Kara’s spent hours talking to Melinda, becoming closer to her than she’s ever been to anyone else. She has friends at school (Alex, Sara, Zoe), but she’s always felt weirdly alienated from the rest of her classmates. Melinda likes to listen to her talk about Greek mythology and weapons history and all the other weird shit that most people find confusing or just too weird. Melinda makes her feel normal. So maybe marrying her best friend for a few years, and then divorcing a few years later, wouldn’t be the worst thing. Especially if the benefits are really that good.

---

Kara’s mom is weirdly supportive. “I know you and Melinda are close,” she says. “And you’re eighteen, I can’t stop you. I just don’t want you to get hurt. Be careful not to take it too seriously, okay?”

Kara hugs her mom and rolls her eyes. “I won’t, Mom,” she says. “We probably won’t even sleep in the same bed or anything.”

When she Skypes Melinda to accept her “proposal,” Melinda smirks. “I told my parents. Dad thinks it’s weird, but he likes the idea of not having to file my taxes for me. Mom lectured me for half an hour in Mandarin about and then said, ‘At least you’ll have someone to look after you, keep you out of trouble.’”

Kara giggles. “Tell her I’ll try?”

“Please. I’m the one that keeps you out of trouble,” teases Melinda. “So, I guess now we’d better figure out how courthouse weddings work. Can you come a couple days early so we can do the ceremony?”

“Yeah, I think so.” Kara nods. “We haven’t booked plane tickets or anything yet. I haven’t even really started packing.”

“Oh, and we should probably get rings. Doesn’t have to be fancy ones, just to keep up the facade. You might even be able to find something at Claire’s.”

“Yeah, I can do that. Can I stay at your place the extra couple days?”

“I’ll have to ask my parents, but probably that’s fine. They like you. As much as they like anyone, I mean.” Melinda chuckles. “I think you being a girl is helping. Mom’s never been that weird about my girlfriends, but I’m pretty sure she thinks it doesn’t really count unless I’m with a guy.”

Kara snorts and rolls her eyes. “Well, either way, it’s only four years. Then you can go off and marry a nice doctor or whatever they want you to do.”

“No, not a doctor. A lawyer. Not that I’m planning on marrying either one. Maybe not at all. You might be it.”

Kara mock-flinches. “So much pressure! I could sour you on the concept of marriage forever.”

“You could,” teases Melinda. “Okay, I have an essay to write for AP history. Later.”

“Bye,” says Kara, signing off. She has homework too, but instead of working on it she finds herself opening a new tab and going to Target’s jewelry section. Just for laughs, of course.

(The one she ends up picking out, and taking the bus to get the next day, is silver and has two curving lines that cross over each other, with a line of clear gems set into one of the lines. It sort of reminds Kara of an infinity symbol - ironic, but it’s fifteen dollars and won’t look too cheap.)

---

Neither Kara nor Melinda opt to wear white dresses to the courthouse. Melinda because Kara’s pretty sure she doesn’t own a single dress, and Kara because she doesn’t own anything white. She wears her favorite red summer dress and a sapphire necklace her mom insisted she take. Melinda wears a button-up shirt and her nice leather jacket. Kara’s starting to feel like maybe the necklace is too much, but Melinda smiles at her and says, “It brings out your eyes.” Kara says thank you and then laughs, and she’s not sure why.

They mostly spend the time waiting to be called in for the ceremony teasing each other about who’s going to do what. “I don’t bake,” Kara says, “so forget about coming home to fresh-baked cookies.”

“You should make us that pasta salad your mom gave you the recipe for, though,” Melinda says. “That sounds amazing.”

“If you rub my shoulders after dinner?”

“Deal.”

The officiant seems to take their giggly familiarity for actual romantic affection, and the ceremony takes only a few minutes. Kara expects it to feel more important than it does, but before she knows it Melinda is slipping the ring on her finger and pulling her in for a quick kiss at the end of the vows. It’s over before Kara can really absorb it’s happening.

They hold hands out of the courthouse, and Melinda grins over at her. “So,” she says. “How’s it feel?”

Kara shrugs, grinning back. “Totally normal.”

“Good,” Melinda says. “I guess maybe we should’ve practiced kissing first, but he didn’t seem suspicious.”

Kara shrugs. “I dunno. I think it was fine.” She hasn’t been kissed in a long time, not since early junior year when she and Beth broke up. She just hasn’t really had time to worry about finding anybody else.

They go get ice cream and shoot each other secret smiles. Kara eats a chunk of her coffee ice cream and stares at the little silver ring on her finger. It’ll take some getting used to.

---

They get a tiny one-bedroom apartment in the family housing complex, which is way nicer than the dorms even if it doesn’t come with furniture. Melinda’s parents help them buy a cheap bed frame and mattress. “Having only one bed saves money,” Lian May says, when May tries to protest. “And there won’t be enough room for two in this tiny place.”

Melinda makes a face at Kara behind her mother’s back, but Kara just shrugs. It’s not like she hasn’t slept in the same bed as other girls before. It’s no big deal.

There’s a ton of orientation activities for them to go to, but they end up skipping out halfway through and going home to order a pizza and watch Netflix. “I guess we could’ve said we were gonna go Netflix and chill,” teases Kara.

Melinda rolls her eyes and bumps her shoulder. “Dork.”

Kara gets a job in the admissions office, and Melinda ends up working at the on-campus gym. Classes start, and they fall into a routine. They switch off cooking every other night, except if someone has a group meeting or evening lecture and then there are usually leftovers in the fridge. They get invited to a few parties and wave at their neighbors and get pretty good at the whole acting-married thing. Kara finds that the story of how they met doesn’t actually need that much editing; people seem to find it adorable. She meets Bobbi in her intro to human biology class, who tells her about the on-campus LGBT+ society (which, apparently, had had a booth at the clubs fair that they skipped) and gives her her number to hang out later. (Kara tries not to laugh out loud; go figure the only time another queer girl’s ever given her her number, it’s in a totally platonic context.)

And then, a month and a half into the school year, Kara has to consider that she might be falling in love with her “wife.”

Or at least she definitely wants to bone her. She figures that out one night when Melinda’s taking a bath and Kara barges into the bathroom to pee (nothing new, they’ve been doing that since the first week here) and notices, holy shit, Melinda has incredible boobs.

Melinda is reading and, when she notices Kara staring, she looks at her, puzzled. “What?”

“Uh,” says Kara, quickly looking away. “Nothing. Just wondering what you were reading.”

“Just a book for European History. You alright? You seem nervous.”

“I’m fine!” Kara says, too abrupt.

(She ends up having some confusing sexy dreams that night, and luckily Melinda has an early class the next morning and she doesn’t. Once Melinda leaves, she gets herself off quickly and hopes maybe that will be the end of it. Maybe it was just her body needing an orgasm.)

(It wasn’t.)

After that, she starts noticing other things: how shiny Melinda’s hair is in the sunlight, how satisfying it is to make her laugh or smile, how strong her hands are. About a week and a half after the bath incident, Melinda offers to give her a shoulder rub and Kara’s heart starts beating so fast she’s sure Melinda can hear it. But she just nods, and it turns out Melinda’s hands are amazingly strong. Kara probably makes some embarrassing noises, but Melinda doesn’t say anything about it, just smirks and says, “Glad you’re enjoying it.”

“I’m just really tense,” mutters Kara, blushing.

“Hey, I get it. My algebra prof is being a pain in the ass and assigning a ton of homework.” Melinda smiles sympathetically at her. “Anytime you need another one lemme know, okay?”

“Th-thanks,” says Kara. “I can try to do it for you too?”

Melinda shrugs. “Sure.” She shucks off her shirt and turns her back to Kara. “You ever done this before?”

“A couple times,” says Kara, “but I don’t think my hands are as strong as yours.” She starts kneading May’s shoulder muscles anyway.

“Mm, this is fine,” hums Melinda. “Thank you.”

Kara tries really hard to do a good job, and also not to notice how soft Melinda’s skin is.

---

Finally she can’t take it anymore and texts Bobbi to meet up with her for lunch. Bobbi’s probably her closest friend on campus (besides Melinda), she can trust her with her secret.

“Hey,” Bobbi says when she arrives at Teriyaki Madness, setting down her styrofoam container full of food and sitting across from Kara. “What’s up?”

Kara purses her lips and then finally says, “It’s kind of a long story, but it has to do with me and Melinda.”

“You’re not really a couple, are you?” Bobbi asks.

Kara’s so startled all she can do is squeak, “Um.”

“Dude, I figured out you guys were faking it like the third time we all hung out together. You guys are obviously super close, but when you hold hands or hug or kiss you’re so awkward. Like, I’ve had friends that were in LDRs and when they were together you couldn’t pry them apart. Not you guys.” Bobbi raises an eyebrow. “I mean, I’m guessing you got married for tuition, right? Mad props. My last ex wanted to do that but I knew we’d end up divorced in six months.”

Kara puts her face in her hands and groans. “Is it that obvious?”

“I mean, I dunno. I’m pretty perceptive. I think probably most people aren’t thinking that much about it. But anyway, what did you wanna talk to me about? You guys okay other than, y’know, not actually being a couple?”

“Um,” says Kara. “Well.” She stares at her soda, unsure of how to say I wanna have sex with my best friend-slash-wife and also I might be falling in love with her?

Bobbi looks at her for a second. “You’re not like, in trouble, are you?”

“No, no! I mean. I’m okay, I just…” Kara swallows and then mutters “ImightbeintoherIthinkmaybe.”

At that, Bobbi laughs, then slaps a hand over her mouth. “Jeez, sorry, that was mean,” she says, but she’s still grinning. “So you, what, figured out you like her now?”

“I guess,” says Kara, eating a piece of chicken. “She’s...we’ve been best friends for three years, she’s the person I know best in the world. Maybe I should’ve seen this coming.”

Bobbi shrugs and replies, “Hey, just ‘cause you’re close with someone doesn’t mean you’re gonna wanna bone them. Izzy and I practically grew up together and I can’t imagine being into her, she’s like my sister. If I had a really hot sister, I guess. But I’m not interested in her that way. Anyway. What are you gonna do about it?”

“I don’t know!” says Kara. “What am I supposed to do? ‘Hey, best friend who I’m legally married to, I’m thinking maybe I actually wanna date you and not just pretend, how do you feel about that?’ That’s so weird.” She sighs. “This is stupid.”

Shaking her head, Bobbi says, “It’s not. You really just need to talk to her about it. I know it’s gonna be weird, but if she’s not into you too, then you guys can talk about you like, dating other people. Or you can come over and I’ll buy you a shitton of ice cream and we’ll watch dumb movies. Whatever you need.”

“Or I could just never say anything,” Kara says. But she makes a face and nods. “Thanks for listening.”

“Hey, no worries.” Bobbi pauses and then adds, “Listen, if she’s not down for whatever, I’m also available for a friends-with-benefits thing, if you want.” She gives Kara an exaggerated wink.

Kara snorts. “I’ll think about it.”

---

It takes Kara a week to figure out what she wants to say, and then another week to figure out the right time to say it, which means that once she’s finally gotten up the guts it’s midterms week and she and Melinda are so busy they barely see each other. Then after midterms she waits a week or two just to be sure, and then it’s the week before Thanksgiving and it would just be weird to make things weird before Thanksgiving, so she waits some more. (She ends up going home with Melinda and meeting many members of her extended family. To them, she’s just Melinda’s roommate, which is okay. It’s kind of nice to not have to pretend.)

And then it’s the holiday season.

Bobbi’s taken it upon herself to badger Kara about talking to Melinda give-or-take once a week, and by this point she’s just texting stuff like DONE YET? in all-caps. You have to tell her sometime!!!! Bobbi writes. You can’t just NOT!!!!!

u wanna bet

You’re going to die of blue balls or something!

i don’t think that’s possible, bob

and i don’t even have balls

Ok maybe not but seriously, this is ridiculous

Finally, one night they’re watching a movie and Kara blurts out, “I have to talk to you about something.”

Melinda pauses the movie and glances over at her. “What’s up? You okay?”

“Yes. No. I mean-” Kara sighs. “It’s embarrassing.”

Melinda looks even more confused. “What do you mean?”

Kara bites her lip. “I...I like you.”

“Oh.” Melinda just looks at her for a moment.

Kara’s starting to get progressively more anxious and angry with herself when Melinda adds, “Well, good, ‘cause I was trying to figure out how to tell you that I’m into you. It seemed like a bad romance novel cliche.”

Kara laughs, maybe a little hysterically. “Wait, how long have you been…?”

Melinda coughs. “This whole plan may or may not have been my way of trying to tell you.”

“Mel, oh my god! It’s been months! Why didn’t you-”

“Same reason you didn’t,” Melinda says, nudging her with her shoulder. “Too chickenshit to say something.”

“Shit,” says Kara, putting her face in her hands. “I’m sorry, I didn’t know - I’ve been stressing since like before Halloween about this! I told Bobbi and she’s been bugging me to tell you!”

“Oh, Bobbi knows?” Melinda snorts. “Great. So we’ll never hear the end of that.”

“Well, I usually tell you about this stuff, but I couldn’t! Oh my god.” Kara laughs again. “So I guess...now we get to figure out how to date for real?”

“I guess,” Melinda says. “You wanna make out for real?”

“Oh my god, yes.”

(Bobbi never does let them live it down. And they don’t get divorced after the four years are up.)

[fsfantasy95]

Into words

Alright it’s September already. Haha Aug was probably the most happening month after my hiatus from excitement since i think Feb???

But anyway I really didn’t intend to fly two times to the same country within the same month lol. The first one was a genuine holiday trip already in place months ago, the second one popped out only one month before. Er I don’t know what made me decide to go for the second one, probably cos I was captivated by the thought of visiting Xitou, or ok lah maybe I was just being a senseless infatuated fangirl.

The holiday trip was good and all (well it is a holiday after all), i think travel companions matter a lot. So thankfully the friends were all easy-going suibian people who dont mind sleeping in on trips, doing nothing on various days, eating lame food etc etc. On the first day we got our hair done at in%, then I dumped the friends to get a photo with Kent Tsai my new obsession!!! He’s a very very cute derpy little boy. HAHAHA I missed one hour of Peici’s concert as a result of that but ok it wasnt too bad. Did i mention peici’s concert was the reason this trip existed in the first place - as weird as it sounds to have arose from jt LOL. Then I met tph’s tw fan to pass her some i-weekly magazines (lolol) and we spent the night roaming around raohe. LOL i think one memorable moment was getting a leg cramp the moment I sat down in the taxi after walking ages at the night market, I was trying to control myself from screaming in pain and attempting to give directions to the cabby at the same time lmao.

On the 2nd day we concurred to sleep in. Jalan-jalan around XMD, random shops and the arcade, went to my favourite GUANG NAN!, I found the camera streets to buy the battery which I very smartly forgot to bring, more jalan jalan and spent the night early at our accom stocked with beer and food. Shiok! Actually this is the perfect holiday itinerary.

3rd-4th was packed with the tour itinerary up to shei-pa. Ok this was suggested by me because I am a sucker for mountainous areas, I am going to conquer all the national parks in taiwan. Not too bad with nice chilly air, although not as chio as i expected hmms. Jt and I attempted one of the forest trekking paths ourselves and shit that was one scary 40mins of our lives HAHAHA. There was freaking not a single soul in the whole forest and the path was much longer than we expected. There was a point when I wondered if I would ever get out of that place. Then we missed some star-gazing guide at night because idk who remembered the timing wrongly wtf hahahahah then we forced the provision shop to sell us beer and cup noodles even though they were already closed.

Oh yeah I forgot to mention that the bendy roads up were one of the worst..even I felt a bit bad upon reaching the top (I am usually the one enjoying being thrown around the vehicle). Went up further to the national park area - more mountain views, and trekking paths!!! Ok lah my stamina still survivable. Wasted time visiting some boring museum-ish place along the way down and I was late for my Kent Tsai bubble tea shop event. Sucks! Hahaha literally opened my luggage along the streets of xmd to change my camera lens. We did supermarket shopping that night, the loots were a considerable lot hahaha. I remember sleeping around 3am trying to watch xmj’s live after all the packing and watching tv.

Last day was the epic shit having breakfast at the hotel and getting caught in a rat attack. LOL it was damn amusing cos people were screaming and some auntie was trembling in fear just because of one rat. But the rat ended up getting killed right beside our table (VIP zone for us) and I was recording it and we were screaming and laughing so hysterically HAHAHAHA. Shit the singaporean spirit, I was one of the only few whipping out my phone to record the commotion lolololol. We wanted to visit maokong for the last few hours but I think we ended up just roaming the taipei main station underground shops and spending money on arcade and gachapons.

Hahaha definitely an enjoyable trip. We hit 600 for our basketball machine!! and the stupid fruit vinegar drink I bought for kent tsai but had to use it as forfeit to finish the not-so-nice drink XD

Back to work for another two weeks and I was off again. This time for jaydaone only jaydaone. Haha another set of easy-going travel companions, so everything was gooddddd! We checked-in early to get some last minute buys for him (lol the TWG tea smelled funny honestly) and we thought we had much time to jalan jalan and ended up being the last few at the boarding gate.  Took our time to fly there, eat breakfast at the airport, slowly made our way to taichung, and after much walking around finally reached xitou. Shit the bus from taichung to xitou was damn awesome for catching up on sleep. Our minsu owners didnt let us go back to the accom and insisted we toured the monster village first before returning. Oh well never give laoniang here chance to put makeup.... haha we finished the whole village i think by 6+pm. Its not as big as I thought.... but there were some amusing things which we are still laughing over now LOL just some very vulgar packaging boxes useful for scolding people. Cant stop using the phrases after that. Hahahaha bought convenience store food (my mayday limited edition taiwan beer!!) and we were back in the accomm by early night. Idk how we still dragged until past 12midnight to sleep lol . Ate our food (without utensils!!! how can family mart do this to us), drank beer watch TV listened to jaydaone’s radio (and off-ed it halfway cos it was damn noisy) wrote some cards and nuasaied in the room. Shiok.

Up earlyyyyyyyyyyyy as planned but took longer than expected to get ready. So we were behind our own schedule hahaha sucks! We panicked when the minsu person told us it would require around 40mins to reach the event location from the main entrance. Had to forgo the minsu breakfast :c and we made our way direct to the event location. That was quite a climb, and wtf lyc reached even before us. We choped a good spot and yeah of course everybody else just conveniently slotted in without expressing any form of gratitude, ohwells hahahaha but doesnt matter la there is no fierce competition there and then. Lyc appears and sang 4 songs, I wasnt watching him most of the time cos I was busy taking photos. Errrrrr like lol I flew over there just to watch him but end up looking at the camera screen. But I think he was in a good mood c: Haha at the end of the performance we had a mini gathering nearby, it was longer than the performance time. I remember he emerged and was walking down the slope and we went up to say hi. MY PRINCE ON A WHITE HORSE *v* ahhhh hahaha please pardon me while I switch to xmm fangirl mode. I think the rest I should just leave it because I have already recorded it down somewhere and it is not easy to put into words without sounding like a freak. But he is nice nice nice very very nice and I am very very grateful he is who he is. I think I’ve seen him for >15 times but this is the first time(?) i held his hand properly HAHAHA shit this is going to sound erxin but when he was leaving he was saying thanks and he held out his hand so I reached out for it and at that moment I just had this thought that, Oh dear I don’t want to let go yet so I held on and he didnt let go too (!!) I think I had his right and stephy had his left. Hahahahahahaha. Then he gave the kind of look that goes through your eyes and said xiexie. Walao please please kill me please 为什么就是一股温暖满满的温暖我感觉支持你快10年了我青春有你什么都值得了

Lol okay enough hahahaha i think its hard for people to understand. Anyway right after he left we walked back to attempt some last minute sightseeing before rushing for the bus. I remember us scolding some shit while walking HAHAHAHA so much for putting on a fake demure front when the idol’s around. Back to taichung and met with mans the siao last-minute-decided-to-come girl, we created a tiny hoo-ha at uriko’s art exhibition cos they got to know that there were a few singaporeans there lol. But she is very pretty and talented. Now I understand why tintin went crazy over her hahahahaha. Our schedule for the night had two deleted items, one pan wei bo event and one dimdimsum trip, we ended up having dinner at yizhong and trying out the random 100dollar item vending machine. Watched kent tsai and the chi qing nan zi han at night. Freaking 3rd row in a huge cinema i think my neck is very unwell. Walked fengchia at night and found out our flight was delayed by freaking 8 hours!! Ded. Made plans to cancel our HSR tix.

Last day was spent on Kent Tsai at kaohsiung. Haha shit his face was sooooo grumpy that day. We had another round of the movie for the after-show qna and he actually asked us to shhh cos our cameras were so loud. Wtf hahaha this kid. But he is still very cute lah. Then we went to the adidas exhibits thingy and ruifeng night market (extra time cos of the flight delay zzz) and then we slowly took the bus back to taoyuan. Reached airport at 4+am I think. Haha last minute buys at 7-11 and beer. I think I was close to k.o. already, i need sleep!!!! Horrors of further flight delay by 2hrs. Lol kept thinking of how to kaopei the flight carrier. Ended up we didnt use the meal vouchers cos we thought they were for in-flight when they were actually for airport shops zzzzzzzzzzzz. But at the end they gave us flight vouchers and insurance is claimable so Ok lor I dont mind. Luckily I took extra day leave for work beforehand, if not jialat only.

Hahaha awesome awesome trips. Shit once the flying starts I think it is hard to stop. Oh dear. Sigh its back to reality for now... dont know how long I can survive without anymore excitement....... Argh I think i sound like a kid. But whatever lah gimme a break from all these adult life and societal cruelty (and SHITASS people) for once or twice. Bye back to the mundane mundane shitty life.