#low life records
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King Kashmere. The Ill Hand. Lord Rao. Obiesie Adibuah. Galaktus. Chuck Enzo. Kashmere the Iguana Man.
#king kashmere#kashmere the iguana man#strange u#high focus#ynr productions#low life records#one of the illest rappers of all time
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Might never used this program again but here's a low quality benrey animation. 💀
#killing my self#i dont like krita#why is it so difficult#how do you use this program???#fanart#my art#myart#digital art#sketch#doodle#benrey#benrey benry#hlvrai#benrey hlvrai#hlvrai benrey#half life vr but the ai is self aware#half live vr ai#half life vr ai#hlvrai fanart#animation#krita animation#screen recording#gif#fan animation#low quality
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Ed Teach's Stories
From practically the moment we meet him, Ed's identity is unstable. We know who is he (Blackbeard) from context, from the story told by the the room around him, by Izzy and the flag his crew. But the thing is, Ed doesn't fit the story of the Mad Devil Blackbeard. Two of his first few words are "good" and "love" for crying out loud. He's called "Blackbeard," but his beard is grey.
This instability exists because Ed himself isn't sure what story he's telling--or wants to tell. "I shouldn't be bored, I'm fucking Blackbeard!" All through his early episodes Ed is in increasingly desperate tension with his own identity. He's trying to tell stories within stories, wanting all the stories to be true at the same time, yet aware of the reality that the world is constantly trying to wipe one or another of the stories away. And not really trusting that he can tell the whole story of who he is.
In the first season of OFMD, Stede wears a different outfit every episode. Yet Stede remains the same: despite his internal tensions (almost despite himself) there's a stability to his identity. But all through both seasons of OFMD, Ed putting on a new outfit means he's trying to tell a completely different story about himself.
And underneath this cacophony, there's Ed. And Ed is himself a chorus of stories, a living contradiction. A patricidal murderer who was protecting his mother; a paragon of masculinity who longs for softness and fluidity; a man renowned for violence and madness who has in fact carefully cultivated that reputation and is extremely careful with his violence; a killer who doesn't kill, yet who does kill all the time just at a bit of a remove; a half a dozen names and personas and yet always Ed; unloveable, yet deeply loved.
At the beginning of the show, Ed isn't actually good at telling his own story. He's good at listening to other people's stories, and conforming himself to them often without conscious effort. But when he tries to really tell his own story--asking Stede to run off to China, singing his break-up song song, going to become a fisherman--he fails. We don't understand in the first season why his judgement clouds, why he becomes weak when he tries to tell his story. But in the second season after spending half an episode in Ed's mind, a painful truth is undeniable: Ed, like Stede, doesn't think he's worthy of telling his own story.
So instead of telling his own story, Ed let other people tell his story. In the first season, Ed built off what Izzy told him he had to be. But he couldn't lose himself in Blackbeard, no matter how hard he tried. So in the second season, when Ed couldn't face living with his contradictions anymore, he wrote an ending worthy of Blackbeard.
All this, because Ed thinks he can only be "himself" by telling one, single story about himself. By denying his contradictions, rather than embracing them. Splitting himself in two to tell himself a story, rather than telling the story himself.
What Ed doesn't believe or trust is this: For Ed to really be himself, he has to be impossible. Two contradictory things, at the same time.
The second season of OFMD is about learning to embrace all these contradictions. In each episode of OFMD, character look at the same object or situation (a wanted poster, a unicorn, a velvety suit, a relationship, a past trauma) and they tell two completely different stories about it. Sometimes one of those stories turns out to be wrong, but more often than not both are true, and something else--something beautiful-- is born from the place where those contradictions meet. And the characters, Ed most of all, learn to accept and balance this dissonance.
Thematically speaking, I'd argue that's why the second season of OFMD is more fantastical than the first: fantasies are contradictions, real and not-real at the same time. And isn't that what transformation is, in the end? What you are and what you are not, meeting and becoming "you"?
Transformation isn't all good. At first, Ed's fantastic stories hide his pain or invoke despair
But later, the fantasies make their way into reality. The impossible begins to shape reality--and opens a way for hope.
In the last episode of S2, Ed emerges from the waves as the kraken--but there's 3 musical tracks playing, three themes: the kraken, Ed, and Blackbeard. Then he reads a love letter, and has a deeply romantic moment with his boyfriend. He puts on a new outfit to escape the British, yet his personality doesn't change at all. When Izzy first apologizes to him, Ed says "I'm the one who should be apologizing," but then Izzy changes his entire understanding of their relationship. Becomes the first family figure to offer Ed permission to be himself.
Contradictions galore, and yet Ed is still Ed. Both who he was formed into by other people (his father, Izzy, Pop Pop) and yet who he is.
In the final scenes, Ed begins to finally accept the tensions of his life. He tells Zheng that yes, he wants to kill Richie--but he doesn't go on a revenge quest. And while before his forays into being someone else meant changing his name, his clothes and mannerisms, his whole story, he doesn't act like that at all in the last scene of the ep.
And Ed's been able to do all this, to come this far, because of Stede. Stede, who Ed was drawn to because he was a "fancy man who leads a brigade of imbeciles," yet had won a fight with Izzy. Stede, who looked at Ed at his lowest moment, after Ed had admitted that the entire basis of their friendship had been in bad faith, and said, "I'm your friend." Stede who, even knowing Ed wouldn't want to hear from him, poured his heart into letters about how their bond was unbreakable.
Stede is everything he is, all at the same time. And when Ed was drowning in his own contradictions, (a rope tied around him that he could not undo and yet had put on himself) trapped somewhere "inevitable, yet impossible," Stede appeared as a fantastic, beautiful creature and brought him home.
Stede lets Ed be everything he is, and sees it all as true and worthy of love. Even when Ed fucks up, it's all right.
And sometimes, telling two different stories about something doesn't lead to a fragmented self, doesn't drive people apart.
Sometimes, it means understanding. Means acceptance, safety, connection.
From discordance (contradiction), harmony. A gentleman can be a pirate. A man can be a bird, or a unicorn. Izzy can have been one of the good ones and a fucking nightmare. And Ed can tell all his stories, they can all be true--and he can still be Ed.
#ofmd#our flag means death#ofmd s2#ofmd s2 spoilers#ofmd spoilers#ofmd meta#ed teach#stede bonnet#blackbonnet#gentlebeard#okay every single s2 ep has A HEAP OF things where there's one “reality” and multiple stories: Stede's letters; indigo dye...#...zheng the soup lady; a betrayal; wanted posters; a storm; soup in purgatory; life itself; anne and mary to others and themselves;#; pinata and wedding cake; unicorn parts; what happened to buttons; ed's speech; stede's captaining skills; the suit; Izzy's shark#ned lowe's record; ed's treasure and the whole poison/positivity thing; ned's execution; having sex; stede's infamy#that's off the top of my head IT'S EVERYWHERE these writers are unbelievable#long ass post#ofmd season 2 love
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ALSO!!!!!! HAPPY FIVE YEARS ANNIVERSARY TO THIS ICONIC INTRO!!!!!!!💜💜💜💜💜💜💜
#this is vee speaking#HYPMIC NEEDS TO GO BACK TO DOING LORE DROPS DURING LIVES AGAIN THIS WAS SO SICK#LIKE IDK ABOUT YOU BUT IF I HAD THE BAT SEIYUU WALKED INTO MY LIFE LIKE THIS ID NEVER SHUT UP ABOUT THEM#(⬅️had the bat seiyuu show up like this in their debut hypnama stream and in the 5th live and since hasn’t shut up about them LOL)#i didn’t record it but also when chiaking-sama rudely told them to get off the stage lmao the way hayama-san scoffed at her hrrrrggnnffffgf#and the exited stage left while laughing like the villains they really could have been HHHHRRRRRRGGHGHHGRRGGGRRFFRFRFGGFGFG#THE CROWD BECOMING BREATHLESS WHENEVER THE KUUKOU VOICE WENT LOW#THE CROWD SCREAMING ‘KAWAII’ AT SAKAKIHARA-SANS REAL VOICE#THE CROWD INTRIGUED THE MOMENT TAKEUCHI-SAN STARTED TALKING BUT LAUGHING AT HITOYAS DISTASTE FOR FRUITS IN HIS SALAD LMAO#ITS THE PRECURSOR BRO LOL!!!! THE START OF IT ALL WAS RIGHT THERE!!!!!!#i really really miss the 4th live frfr 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭#i wish i didn’t break out in hive watching hypmic content without bat for prolonged periods of time lol 😭😭😭😭😭😭
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It’s always Christmas or the sound of summer in the Schlager hit parade.
#pet shop boys#chris lowe#neil tennant#pethead#psb#synthpop#gifset#edit#lgbtq#nonetheless#the schlager hit parade#neil imitating chris is genuinely hilarious#chris being his goofy self is what i live for and neil gets to see that in person every day of his life#neil's fond look when he realizes chris is recording him....#they're always on a date#also not pictured for obvious reasons but chris adding a gay married couple was a choice for sure#he really said let's make this album even gayer and he delivered
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hi bb! i hope you’re having a good day/night and that you’re taking care of yourself!! 🫶 remember to drink plenty of water and to take breaks when you need them 🩷
thank you for the reminder ♡
#almost got myself admitted this week#ask#other#mon suffering#new record low of my life#at least I can draw long hair men
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modern CPR is around 60 years old. that's just wild to me. related but tangential: also wild to watch people resuscitate animals, solely with chest compressions
#for the record from what i've read CPR on pets works about 5% of the time in a veterinary setting#it's VERY VERY LOW#it is NOT common to be able to resuscitate an animal. don't look up human CPR statistics either--#even a 1% chance of saving someone's life is worth it
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Halsey and TGI, get behind me
#can the critics back off... just got suggested an article being like 'this album is a new low... its not charting'#like fuck you.... halsey made this album knowing there's a good chance it would be their last and you're out here calling it a flop just bc#it hasn't broken records.....????#not even getting into the ppl calling halsey self-centered for talking about their issues and life in their own album#like what did you expect artists to sing/write about if not mostly their life???
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TURNED IT IN TURNED IT IN MOST RECORD AMOUNT OF ALL NIGHTERS IN MY LIFE BUT I DID IT BY GOD TURNED IN MY THESIS IM FREE IM FREE IM FREE IM FREE
#sorry I’ve gotten very little sleep total in the past week#probably a record low in my life#makes me feel quite frenzied and insane this probably is incoherent in retrospect but oh well everyone rejoice with me I finished with just#enough time to go out and see the sunrise (oh god I can’t believe it’s fucking daytime again)#gravical#gonna lay on the lawn and take a napppppppppppp
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i don't normally do new year's resolutions but i think this year i want to start and finish a new piece of media every month, and i'm probably going to start with ikuhara's filmography because i have been meaning to watch mawaru penguindrum and yurikuma arashi and sarazanmai for like. multiple years at this point. after that i don't know but i have like 30+ shows *just* on my anime watchlist so i shouldn't be running out of options anytime soon lol
#snail speaks#aside from a handful of books and movies pretty much the only new show i got through in its entirety this#year was trigun because the rest of the time i've just been so obsessed w hxh lmao#i saw quite a bit of house while my parents were watching it and i watched like 50ish episodes of the latter half of#dragon ball classic with my brother but other than that there hasn't been much#actually i just remembered i did read yyh at around the same time i was watching trigun but im p sure that's the only other one#the amount of new art ive interacted with this year is genuinely at a record low compared to the last few years its wild#i don't know that i've ever had a hyperfixation this bad before#which is really saying something considering i've been into minecraft for more than half my life atp
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i think one of the craziest things about biphobia is that no matter the gender people doubt our attraction to women. bi women are assumed to be straight and looking for attention, bi men are assumed to be gay and looking to avoid attention. like have you even met a bisexual person? fuck, have you met a woman?
#although when i was using they/them and presenting androgynous people were too busy doubting my gender to doubt my sexuality#so i experienced record low biphobia during that period of my life
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Alas, poetry has fallen by the way.
…I was going to turn my “no poem” announcement into a poem but I am.. that. tired.
#my 1yo is having health issues still#kids are busy busy busy#my life#the eternal house projects march on#I continue to have record low energy#it’s a whole thing#but hey! I wrote for over a week. that’s more than I’ve done in years#napowrimo 2024#my writing
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From this article (published july 12, 2023)
#y am i posting this? bc its 2am and its 80+ degrees outside and probably around that temp in my apartment as well#im a healthy young person so im fine but like idk living thru this heat wave is genuinely quite scary#like in an existential way. like in a this does not bode well for our immediate future way#like i did not grow up in a place whwre the temp is 100+ consistantly but like its so hot#like the sun has like a physical weight even with low humidity. its oppressively hot#and i only live in an area where its 102-107F or 38.9C-41.7C#just. if ur in the southwest stay safe. if ur outside the southwest or another place currently experiencing a heat wave: its pretty awful#real life#heat wave#and id anyone tries to come at me on the science. i literally have 2 advanced degrees in environmental science. this is just one year but#its notable that its happening especially with record highs popping up across the globe. not just in the summer. it does not bode well
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#been experimenting with singing & i figured out the other day that rhiannon by fleetwood mac is all in a range i can sing#at least reasonably well lmao idk if im hitting all the notes but it sounds pretty good#anyway interestingly enough my voice sounds way more masc on the HIGH notes. not the low notes#like i recorded myself & listened back b/c i was curious#''rhiannon rings like a bell through the night and wouldn't you love to love her'' is in androgynous gets-ma'amed-on-the-phone voice#but ''all your life you've never seen woman taken by the wind'' is very clearly like. this is a man covering this song#maybe just because i was really going for it? or maybe it's actually something about the higher notes. not sure#in any case it's nice & i really like rhiannon. really good song#i want ONE famous song i can sing confidently in case anyone ever invites me to karaoke lol#girl guide motto. be prepared#personal
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WHY IS IT ALL BORA
#Using a low-quality screen recording app so there's a water mark on the bottom SMH#i've got a subconscious life
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in other news, i think i've finally!!!! planned out and fully decided on my first tattoo and will be scheduling her shortly
#for years i thought my first tattoo would be harry styles related which is wild to think abt now#then i thought i would get something inspired by one of bo burnham's specials bc they were also deeply impactful for me#but i could never come up with an idea honoring either of them that i felt confident about#and then. december of last year. i heard an album that truly changed my life#hypochondriac by brakence is an album i have played from front to back... too many times to count#and it's not a case of 'i wish i could listen to this for the first time again' bc every single song somehow still hits me the same#after an entire year of playing this record over and over again#and to me the tattoo i'm planning not only represents this music i love so so much#but about so many things in my life#bisexuality. handling anxiety. riding the line between the highest highs and lowest lows and finding a middle ground#ugh. i love brakence so much i'm so excited~#and i might get a skyrim tattoo later too hehehe
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