#lovee this photo had to post it on it's own

[heavenorhella2001]

This had never occurred to me way back when when I first watched playthroughs of the game/played it myself, but;

Seeing this post made me remember Max's nightmare, when she was trapped in her own mind/a broken version of reality.

And seeing this now?

Max definitely has PTSD.

Everyone always primarily discusses/ focuses on Chloe's trauma (which is understandable. I'll always be a Chloe defender and don't want to downplay her trauma by any means.)

But, unfortunately, Max's is overlooked.

Now, a lot of people might view this skeptically, question the idea of Max having PTSD. To many, it might seem like Max doesn't really have any lasting form of major trauma after the events of the game. Maybe she really was content and at peace and happy-go-lucky. (I've always scoffed at that scene at Chloe's funeral, when Max smiles at the butterfly.) And I'll admit, within the context of the story maybe we aren't supposed to think so. But if that's the case I just have to assume that's due to the developing team's lack of knowledge, experience with mental health and how it works, the impact things like this have on someone. Not that they are coming from a malicious place, of course. But very rarely does a person 'get it' unless they've been through it themselves. The average person simply won't understand.

But if you see everything I've described here as it's laid out, it makes total sense;

Let's talk about Jefferson. He is just one of many elements in the game contributing to Max's trauma. He was her teacher, someone she looked up to, respected, and was supposed to be able to trust. She truly felt safe around him. It's implied she had a crush on him. But her image of him completely shattered. After the truth about him was revealed, she was no longer able to trust her own judgement of people, her perception of reality.

He drugged her when she was vulnerable, and she was helpless to watch as he shot and killed the love of her life right in front of her. He kidnapped her, and she was thrown from the frying pan right into the fire. When she woke up she was tied up in a basement, helpless, and he had burned all her photos. Not only precious memories, but also one of her only means of going back and fixing things. He then took photos of her, over and over, this went on for who knows how long, while she was drugged, tied up and helpless, in order to satisfy his own perversions. Throughout, he mocked and tormented her.

Then, let's go into what happened with Chloe. Having to watch her best friend, the girl she loved, die over and over and over again. Max felt responsible for fixing it, preventing it, because she was the only one who possibly could. She would blame herself, think of it as a failure on her part each time Chloe died.

After watching her die in various ways, so many times, I'm sure Max questioned if she really even could save Chloe- or if Chloe was supposed to die from the start, and the universe was determined to restore the balance, no matter what Max did or how hard she tried.

And then there's Kate. This could go one of two ways depending on your choices, one of which is infinitely worse and more traumatizing, but either way it would definitely have haunted Max and left an impact on her.

Imagine how you would feel, knowing one of your closest friends was being bullied. Knowing they have been drunk/drugged and taken advantage of at a party. Yet instead of anyone coming forward, doing the right thing and helping Kate out of that situation, everyone at the party instead weaponized it, used it against her, slut-shamed her even though she wasn't in her right mind, was barely even conscious and was in no way able to consent to anything that was happening. Not that slut-shaming her would have in any way been okay or excusable even if Kate was acting of her own volition. Knowing that, even though you don't agree/don't identify with that, that your friend is deeply religious and clings to faith as a means of comfort. Knowing that she feels like a failure, that she feels like she's betrayed her faith, everything she stands for, and her family, even though she was in fact a victim in her situation. Being able to read letters, watching her family victim-blame her, hide behind their beliefs as a means to tear down someone they should feel obligated to protect, to support. Watching your friend be alienated by everyone around her, including her own family. Watching the school bullies write obscenities about your friend on the walls, and in the bathroom, make jabs at her and taunt her at every possible opportunity. Your friend's light has begun to dim, she starts pulling away from you, begins hiding away in her room more, which now feels like a dark, oppresive void. You know your friend is depressed, and you're trying to be supportive in any way you can, but there's a distance building between you you feel you can't bridge.

Then it happens. She kills herself/tries to kill herself. In front of you, and everyone who tormented her. Even then, the people who hurt her have no shame, laughing and recording her when she's in crisis. You begin to question and blame yourself, blaming youself for not noticing something was severely wrong earlier, not recognizing the impending signs for what they were. You want to help your friend, to save her, but your powers at failing you at the worst possible time. You only get one chance to do this, like everyone else, and you have to do it the right way.

If Max managed to talk Kate down, that's still an instense emotional weight, still a serious event to work through and process.

If Kate jumps…well…

Max feels like a failure. Like she contributed to Kate's death just as much as everyone else. Like she may as well have pushed Kate off that ledge herself. Not only watching your friend die in front of you, but knowing that it was self-inflicted in a moment of desperation, that they chose to do so and your words had no effect…

Now, the end of the game. Depending on what you choose, Max either has to to feel an immeasurable weight on her conscience, the responsibility for the destruction of the town where she was born. Where she grew up. Where she has countless memories, despite its' faults. The deaths of almost everyone there she's ever known.

Including (especially) Joyce.

The guilt of feeling like she took Chloe's mom away from her too, after Chloe had already lost her dad.

Oh. And that reminds me.

It was an incredible miracle, Max discovering her ability to go back through time via photos. Being able to go back 5 years, to when she and Chloe were only 13, before all the horror had happened, and save William. The sense of sheer relief, happiness and accomplishment she felt. She felt like a hero.

Only for it to all blow up in her face in the worst possible way.

Seeing Chloe, now a total shell of her former self. Completely disabled, and paralyzed. Helpless. Unable to live on her own. Seeing firsthand the emotional and financial stress William and Joyce are going through as a result of the accident. Chloe having so little quality of life that she pleads with Max to kill her, because she can't even do it herself.

(This is not my narrative or opinion on Chloe's situation, by the way. This is how it's portrayed. Quality of life, determining whether your life is worth living to due a life-changing accident or consequent disability is the choice of the invidual whom it effects. I'm not saying that anyone in Chloe's situation, who is paralyzed would inherently have no quality of life or no reason to live. That really depends on the invidiual, what that person needs in order to truly live and thrive, whether that person has family and friends and an emotional/practical support system in their life, etc. For Chloe, for me, and for many other people, though not all, living that kind of life would not be worth it.)

Max, depending on your choices, having to kill Chloe, to choose the merciful path, allow Chloe to exercise her autonomy in a world in which she can no longer do so and put her out of her misery. Knowing that she's doing for Chloe what she'd want someone to do for her if she were in that situation, yet still full of pain and regrets.

Max then having to go back and undo it all. Allow William to die again. Watch Chloe experience that horror and trauma again, knowing now she could've prevented it. But at what cost?

Lastly, if you chose to let Chloe go. To let her die.

That makes it immeasurably worse in my opinion.

The week she and Chloe spent together, reconnecting and rebulding their friendship, everything they went through together, would essentially never have happened.

Chloe, in this timeline, died alone in a bathroom. She never recieved any sort of closure, never got to know what happened to Rachel, questioning if Rachel perhaps just abandoned her, similarly to how Max did.

She never got to resolve things with Max, never heard from her again. She never got to know that Max still loved her, still cared about her and thought of her, but was too scared and guilty to reach out.

She never got to patch up things with her mom, or with David.

Everything Max went through. Everything she experienced.

To recap:

Having to watch her best friend, the woman she loves, die over and over again, feeling helpless, trapped in this endless, hellish cycle of death.

Being lulled into a false sense of security, betrayed and abducted by someone she thought she could trust, someone she looked up to.

Witnessing firsthand Kate's suicide/attempt, feeling like she failed her.

Being forced to let William die again, and force Joyce and Chloe to suffer that loss again.

Having to watch Joyce mourn her only daughter, after already losing her husband. Knowing she could've prevented it.

Everything that happened would still exist, but only in Max's mind.

She has no one she could ever confide in, talk to, or open up about it.

Chloe, for her, was that person.

No one would believe her, albeit understandably.

It's implied her powers vanish after she goes back that final time to let Chloe die.

She'd have no way to prove her story was true.

Carrying the weight of that burden, that knowledge and trauma, alone, would drive anyone insane.

Feeling like everything she went through, all the efforts she made to keep Chloe alive, were pointless.

I don't believe there is any way Max could be okay after that.

She'd be a hollow shell, just going through the motions. Totally disconnected from the world and the people around her. (Understandably. Who the hell could she connect to? Who would understand her?) Everyone at Blackwell, and their student lives and petty drama would feel so insignificant. So incredibly stupid and shallow to Max after what she's been through.

In fact, I've always felt - years after the events of the game, were you to choose to let Chloe die - that Max likely killed herself.

Over time, she probably began to question herself, to feel crazy, and begin wondering whether any of what happened, actually did, or if it was just something her mind created.

Max's trauma, her thoughts and emotions in regards to all of this are reflected in this part of the game, her mental breakdown. You can see her self-loathing, the way she blames and criticizes herself, in her interactions with herself and in her distorted journal entries.

Anyway. I never really liked Max all that much as a protagonist.

I thought she was a pushover, a little shallow, cared too much about what people like Victoria thought of her. I thought it was pretty unforgivable the way she ghosted Chloe, at the most traumatic, formative time of Chloe's life, when she had just lost the most important person in her life, besides Max. I understand anxiety, feeling awkward, helpless and flailing in that situation and not knowing what to say or do to make it better, but it just doesn't matter to me. Nothing excuses that.

However…

Max, did ultimately (well, depending on your choice at the ending,) make it right.

This has given me some perspective, and I have a lot more empathy for her now.

     you thought you could control everybody and everything, huh?      —   twist time around your fingers?

[satellitespinner]

merry christmas, please dont call. (e.w) ❆

���₊❆⋆ ୨⎯ merry christmas, im not yours at all. merry christmas, please dont call. ⎯୧ ⁺₊❆⋆

pairings: ex!ellie x ex!oc/reader

synopsis: an involuntary trip back to your hometown brings back unwanted memories of the girl who broke your heart years before. when youre met with her unexpectedly, you have to decide wether or not to pursue her, or give her a taste of her own medicine. or maybe both.

wc: 6.7k (SMUT; ellie eats pussy then yall ✂️✂️.. angst, cheating, crying, slight comfort but no happy ending, reader is an offputting bitch who cries alot. joel and DINA mention!!!!!! the words and and you are used alot.. oc is shorter than ellie & has hair.)

MERRY CHRISTMAS DYKES IN MY PHONEEE !!! ilysm! im so excited to post this holy fucking shit shyt. interact i beg u. reblogs and comments are encouraged i loveee talking to you guys sm!!! 🫵🏼 come ttm and ill talk back! heavily inspired by my twin @coeurify !! i suggest you go read ttds 1 before reading this!

Christmas of freshman year Ellie bought you a bouquet of red and yellow flowers, you cried.

Christmas of sophomore year she burned you a cd with your shared playlist on it. She titled it ‘our songs” and you cried.

The next year she wrote you a song, it was truly beautiful. it made you cry.

Christmas of senior year was different. That year, your parents decided to use the break to visit universities and then stay at a nearby family member's house for the holiday. Before you left Ellie managed to gift you a shiny heart pendant with her initial carved onto the front and a picture of you two glued to the inside. you cried, hugged her, and told her you loved her.

The Christmas before you left for university Ellie broke up with you. This was the hardest you cried in five years.

So much for a Merry Christmas.

That was two years ago. you haven’t been back to your hometown since then, simply because you knew you couldn’t bear to face her. Going back to Jackson meant running into Ellie, and you weren’t ready for that.

until now, apparently.

your dearest mother had called you and told you that if you didn’t come back this year all your shit was going to the goodwill. Maybe Ellie wasn’t the only reason you avoided your hometown.

So here you were, driving the sickly long drive to the closest place to hell on earth. you had to stop four times because your tears were blurring your vision. when you were finally met with the “Welcome to Jackson” sign, you threw up in your mouth. your driveway mocked you as you sat in your car attempting to collect yourself. you contemplated turning around, driving back to campus and telling your mom to burn your stuff for all you care. But, you didn’t. it was late and you needed sleep. so you pulled your keys out of the ignition, grabbed your belongings and made your way to the front door. your parents greeted you with tights hugs and uncomfortable small talk.

“How’s school, sweetheart?” your mom asked, your dad sneaking off to bring your bags to your old bedroom. “its school.” you kept you answers curt. not trying to engage in useless conversation at this hour. your mom picked up on your exhaustion and excused you with a tight lipped smile. the second you entered your room you regretted the entire trip. she was everywhere. pictures of you kissing on your dresser, her hoodies in your closet and of course, her initial still around your neck, above your heart.

you walked around the room, your cheeks already wet with tears. you picked up a photo that you couldn’t bring yourself to throw out when it ended. it was you and ellie snuggled up on dina’s couch, taken by her of course. you both looked so peaceful. the photo began to blur as the tears really started to fall. your legs gave out underneath you, causing you to fall against the wall. it was like a scene from a movie, a pathetic one at that.

You couldn’t remember exactly when you had fallen asleep, but it was late. you woke up in a fetal position on the floor, with an old picture of you and Ellie held tightly to your chest. your poor back..

the morning was still, your parents were still sleeping when you woke up, something you were very much grateful for considering the amount of questions you knew were to come your way when they did finally wake up. you set the picture back in its place hesitantly.

the lower level of your house was cold, the cold floors hitting your feet woke you up as you made your way to the kitchen. almost immediately upon arrival you decided that your mothers coffee brand wouldn’t do. she always bought the gross nutmeg flavoured creamer.

coffee shop in town it is!

you always hated ben’s, the coffee was mediocre at best and priced at a whopping seven dollars, but it would suffice for today. at least until you could get to the grocery store. the walk was short, thank god. you grabbed your jacket and scarf from the hook and made your way out the door. you were surprised, but relieved that you hadn’t had the misfortune of running into anyone you used to know.

The cafe had a welcoming atmosphere that you knew all too well, yet grew to despise. you ended up hating most parts of this town, the tight knit community, the overpriced coffee, everything. then you left. in your final days of staying in jackson, it was like you were gasping for air. then finally after you had gone to university, you could breathe again.

“Is that who I think it is?!” the cashier beamed from their place behind the counter. you could recognize that voice anywhere. the voice of riley abel, a girl you had gone to school with. she was voted most likely to move far away after grad, how ironic.

‘Hey, riley. how are you?” you asked as you walked up to the counter, trying your absolute best to sound interested. you zoned out as she rambled on about her life.

you picked at your fingernails while she spoke, her voice a distant muffle. you didn’t want to be rude and tell her to shut up, but damn this girl couldn’t talk.

“Anyways, how are you? I feel like I haven't seen you in ages!” she smiled and you couldn’t meet her eyes. “I’m doing fine.” she took your awkward answer as a hint and switched the subject. small talk should be banned.

“So what can i get for you?” she asks, typing away at the ipad on the counter. you contemplated for a moment before answering. you skimmed the menu for the cheapest option that didn’t taste like shit.

“I’ll get a medium french vanilla, please.” you grab your phone from your pocket, opting for apple pay instead of cash. she gives you a small, forced smile. “your total is eight dollars and twenty-five cents. cash or card?” your eyes widen at the price. “card, please.” she nods and passes you the pin pad. you gently tap your phone on the top of it as she begins to make your coffee.

A few minutes pass before riley calls you back up to the counter. she handed you a small cup with your name written on the side, along with a small smiley face. you thanked her and smiled at her small act of kindness.

your walk home is longer, many of the places you used to frequent, bustling with people that you could recognize by face. you almost stopped a few times, pausing and staring into oblivion. you never had the guts to actually enter though.

when you arrived back home you parents were sitting around the dining table, your dad, fairly engaged in the newspaper greets you with a smile. your mother doesnt look up from her phone until you speak. “Saw riley at bennys.” she hums and looks you up and down, it was like no matter where you went there was some weird tension in the air.

“You couldn’t have made coffee at home?” she snarks, tipping her glasses off her nose. “Just wanted some fresh air.” you reply nervously, not wanting to be fighting with her already. clearly your attempts worked because she stopped there. you swallowed the lump in your throat and retreated to your room.

you weren't sure what you were going to occupy yourself for these two weeks, packing up all the shit you wanted wouldn't take more than a few hours. you contemplated just taking your belongings and going back but you knew your mom would disapprove with that idea.

you decided that the most worthwhile decision for now would be to resume your place in a current book you were reading, a silly romcom you were gifted by your roommate before you came home. at least until your mother asked you to help her bake some cookies, or run to target for some last minute christmas gifts.

six chapters in and you were finally starting to get into it when you get a text. a text from Dina, a close highschool friend. you tried to stay in contact after you left, but the relationship fizzled out into short happy birthdays, and merry christmases.

D-Dawg💘

Hey! i heard from riley that you're back for break, we all miss you.

You laugh at the corny name you assigned to her contact in high school, the name had blossomed after a drunk comment from jesse, comparing her to a dog simply because of her big brown eyes.

D-Dawg💘

were having a little get together tonight, if you’re up to it you should come by. you're always welcome.

you decided to ignore the message for now, you weren't really up for the whole forced small talk that came with seeing all your old friends again. as far as you knew they were all still hanging out, everyday, without you. instead you decided to resume your place in your book, hoping to find some sort of entertainment in it.

you’re in the middle of chapter twelve of your book, Wes and Liz had just gotten into an accident in the rain when your mom calls you down stairs. you trot down the stairs, phone in hand. when you arrive, you stick on the last step, the wooden floors still cold. you're greeted with your mother in her signature bird print apron.

“Did you wanna help me with the baking, or were you just gonna sulk in your room all break?” she asks. you clear your throat and step down the last step. you shove your phone into your hoodie pocket, “Yeah ill help, i’d love to.”

“Babe, get your damn fingers outa the cookie dough!” ellie laughs as she grabs your wrist, pulling you out of the batter. you had forced her into baking with you after you saw a stupid couples tiktok. “Relax, its just us eating them anyway.” you defend, you even noticed your precious girlfriend sneaking chocolate chips from the bowl once in a while.

“Yeah, well i don't play about my christmas cookies.” she puts her hands on her hips and glares at you jokingly. you giggle at her actions. “We can tell, fatty.” you joke, her eyes widen and her jaw drops. “What did you just say!?” her slack jaw turning into a toothy smile quickly.

“Nothin’ i didn't say nothin’” you laugh and turn back to shaping the cookies. she steps closer to you and places her hands on either sides of your hips. “Well, thats weird. cause’ I definitely heard something.” she starts moving her fingers in slow circles over your pj pants, her lips meeting your neck slowly.

“hell, ellie. why are you the horniest woman on the planet.” you drop your final cookie onto the tray and turn around to face her, her hands now moving to the sides of your face. “Not my fault I have the prettiest girlfriend ever.” she states, matter of factly. her lips now kissing your own, causing you to smile against her. you move your hands to the back of her neck, slowly twirling with the back of her hair. you both giggle against each others lips, “I love you” you whispered against her. “i love you too, baby.”

the soft moment was interrupted by the oven beeping, signaling it was time to finally bake the cookies. she pulls her hands off of your hips and reaches for the pan, nodding at you to open the oven. “Careful, don't burn yourself.” you open the oven door enough for her to slip the tray in without accidentally knocking her hand against the wall and giving herself third degree burns (again)

you both high five once the cookies were in the oven baking. “i think we make a pretty good team!” you say as you turn the tap on to wash the dough off your hands. “Hell yeah we do, baby!” ellie shouts, smacking your ass. you laugh loudly at her antics. “Ouch ellie!” you cry, pulling a towel off the counter to dry off your hands. she rolls her eyes at your exaggeration.

“Sorry, babe. want me to kiss it better?”

“Will you shut up?”

Baking cookies with your mother was a stressful, if not brutal experience. she was a bossy, nitpicky perfectionist. it was like you could never do anything right with her, everything had to be 100% perfect. she would argue that you weren't trying or you didn't care, but you did. if anything you cared too much.

“I told you to do it like this! not whatever you're doing.” she scolded and nearly ripped the bowl from your hands, demonstrating how she really wanted it done. you throw your hands in the air, “I am, fuck!” you whisper yelled in frustration. your mother abruptly dropped the bowl onto the counter. “Don't you swear at me!” she pointed her pointer finger in your face.

“Oh my god.” you mumbled under your breath. you brought two of your fingers to your temples and squeezed tightly, trying to calm yourself down. “What is your problem?!” your mother crossed her arms as she yelled. “I cant fucking- I cant do this! this is exhausting!” you quickly untied your apron and tossed it on the counter. throwing yourself up the stairs. your mother followed behind you.

“If I'm so exhausting then why don't you pack your shit and get out of my house, huh?!” she shouted, grabbing onto your arm, you pulled it away from her. “Because! you asked me to come! i thought we could've had a normal christmas for once!” by now you had salty tear drops racing down your cheeks, it wasn't pretty.

“well i shouldn't have. so that was my mistake.” she stops on the stairs when she says this. your heart stops for a moment when she says this. the tears come harder when you slam your door shut and lock it.

right now you felt like you were a teenager again, petty arguments with your mom is when you needed ellie the most, you would hop out your window and run to her house. she welcomed you with open arms and told you how much she loved you. she would hold you for hours and whisper praises into your ears while you cried.

But right now, at this moment you couldn't do that, because there was no more ellie.

After scream sobbing into your pillow like an angry child, you fell asleep.

you woke up with a throbbing headache and the need for water. you also woke up to a few unread messages from a few of your friends from highschool.

Jesseee

Hey, r u coming tn? dina said she invited u but u didn’t answer. We miss U

smartass (derogatory)

hi its abby! heard ur in town

smartass (derogatory)

we should hangout before you leave!

you sighed and glanced up at the time. 8:04pm. you had two options, go pack to sleep, or stay up and wallow in self pity. or-

D-Dawg💘

were having a little get together tonight, if you’re up to it you should come by. you're always welcome

hii dina, i’d love to see you! what time does it start? :)

D-Dawg💘

8! didnt think u were gonna reply! but def come by!

her reply came fairly quick. you glanced up at the time on your phone, 6;00. you could work with that. two hours to make sure you look good, just in case you see.. she who shall not be named. you pulled your suitcase out from under your bed. you rummaged for a few minutes until you were met with the one dress you brought with you because you knew your parents had some stupid family dinner planned for christmas day. the dress was modest, classy but not too fancy. next was your makeup makeup bag. you decided to keep your makeup simple too, so you looked good, but not like you were trying to look good.

you brought your makeup bag to the bathroom and started the shower. you usually tried to be quick with your showers considering you were using the only bathroom in the house. you let the warm water hit the back of your neck. for a while, you just sat. sat and stared at the wall. the longer you did this though, the higher your anxieties got. finally, after your neck started to burn from the water, you got on with your business, scrubbing your skin raw and washing your hair as quick as you could. you might be a little late..

after an hour and four almost-breakdowns you had gotten your hair to cooperate. you knew your makeup wouldn’t take long to get done so you before you started you checked your phone. no new notifications from anyone except dina, a simple follow up text of “it will be fun, i promise.” you debated asking her to confirm your fears of ellie’s attendance. maybe knowing would calm you just a bit.

Is she gonna be there?

please be honest.

D-Dawg 💘

she was invited, im not sure if she’ll show up though.

D-Dawg💘

Please don’t stress over this though. its been so long.

im aware, but its still scary

plus you’re all still friends. im not really part of

that anymore.

D-Dawg💘

maybe you guys could talk about it?

i can’t do that. you know i can’t

i will literally die.

likr

my life will end.

D-Dawg💘

sighs loudly…..

fine. but if she comes you

aren’t irish goodbying out my back door.

…

MAYBE.

see u soon -_-

you turned up your music and then shut off your phone, leaving it face down on the counter as you began your makeup. you gently hummed along with the lyrics as the soft brushes worked over your skin. the delicate touches reminding you of ellie’s gentle fingers tracing soft shapes into your cheeks as you slept in her arms. she was never scared to hold you, to tightly pull you into her body and keep you warm.

by the time you had finished your makeup and wiggled into your dress, it was 7:45. the drive to dinas wasn’t long and you didn't want to get there early and be left to awkwardly wait around for everyone else to arrive. so you decided to scroll on your phone to pass the time.

at 8:12 you pulled into dina’s driveway and immediately noticed the differences in her home. the christmas decorations were no longer over the top, and the driveway was shoveled neatly. dina had told you to just let yourself in when you arrived. your hand shook with anxiety as you reached the doorknob. you took one last deep breath and entered the house.

“Bitch, you’re unseasoned chicken.” are the first words you hear as you shut dinas door. you easily recognize jesses voice, throwing insults at abby over a heated card game.

“yikes.” you say, heads turn in your direction. you awkwardly laugh at the group reaction. “I told you she was coming, you dummies.” Dina shouted, her voice booming from the kitchen as she walked over to you, pulling you into a firm embrace.

you scanned the room for any sign of ellie. well, there were many things that could be considered signs of ellie around the house. like the homemade ornaments on dina’s tree. you had all had a sleepover one night in sophomore year and decided to create little hand painted ornaments for fun. ellie’s was a painting of the four of you as stick figures, yours and ellie’s had a big red heart painted over the top of their heads.

the memories flooded in as you stared down the tree, to anyone else this probably would’ve looked really weird, but your friends new. jesses voice interrupts your thoughts, you tore your eyes from the tree to look at him.

“she hasn’t shown up yet.”

and she never did.

Ellies absence didn't make the night any better, however. you hoped it would but it didn't. you were still bombarded with questions that you weren’t quite sure how to answer. dina had probably asked you about a thousand times to just talk to her! but you refused. you were not about to start up a conversation with your ex like nothing had happened between you two. especially when it was her shitty actions, not yours.

you didn't regret going but by the time it was time for you to leave you were happy to do so, your friends bargained with you to stay the night like the rest of them but you politely declined. you did promise to see then all properly before you headed back to campus, though. stating that a proper hangout was long overdue.

after you had said your goodbyes dina had offered to walk you out to your car, you told her you would be fine but she persisted.

“So, ellie texted me.” she slowed to a stop with her arms crossed. you sighed and turned around to face her, leaning your body against your car. “Do i even wanna know?” you roll your eyes. dina steps closer to you, joining you against the hood of your car. dina chuckles, trying to recall ellie’s exact words. “said she wanted to talk, she sounded apologetic” she looks up at you. scanning your face for any emotions.

“Dina-“

“Please, just listen.” she interrupts, “i miss my best friends, everyone misses you guys. nothings been the same since.” her voice going from firm and loud, to a shaky whisper. you sighed.

“I know, D. this is hard for me too. you’d think it would've gotten easier to be here, in this town but its not. i feel like i can’t breathe.” dina nods in understanding. you softly sniffle, the cold air makes your face tighten. the both of you stay silent for a while. dina knew there was more to be said, but she didn’t want to push you.

“I’m sorry.” dina looks back up at your face, her voice now held a panicked tone. you close your eyes, throwing up your hand in a worn out manner, “It’s fine-

“But its not! you’re my best fucking friend. and even though it felt like shit when you just- up and ghosted us, i understand why.” she she paused for a moment, moving her body from beside you to standing in front of you, mirroring you. “And i understand if you never wanna see ellie again, but i missed you so bad, so fucking bad.” at this point shes crying, fat tears run down her cheeks. you coo and bring her into your arms.

”oh dina, if anything i should be the one apologizing.” the shorter woman sobs into your shoulder. you both cried into each other like a cheesy soap opera. this was the one thing you missed about being in jackson. “i missed you so much”

The sound of your doorbell reverberated across your house, “ill get it!” you ran so fast to the door that you had tripped over your own feet a few times. you opened the door to reveal ellie and joel behind it. a small smile growing on her face when it was in fact you who opened the door and not your mother.

“You look pretty” she says as she walks in,you thank her with a small kiss on the cheek. “Merry Christmas!” you greet joel quickly before he retreats to the kitchen, probably to drink wine and gossip with your parents. “I like your sweater.” you look her up and down, gesturing to the wool sweater that adorned her figure.

“Oh thanks, My girlfriend got it for me!” she says sarcastically, you roll your eyes at her stupid joke. “Yeah, I know.” you grab her by the wrist and tug her up the stairs to your bedroom. you shuffled her into your room and quickly shut the door behind you.

“Would you care to see your gift?” you asked, in a pretend seductive voice. she nodded persistently and shot you a toothy grin. “Perfect!” you clap your hands together and open up your closet, retrieving a small red box with a big green ribbon wrapped around the top.

you couldn’t contain your excitement when you handed her the gift, your body was seen to be vibrating in its place. “C’mon, ellie! openitopenitopeni-“ you ramble, basically throwing the box at her. “Okay! Okay! Slow down, babe.” you both sit down on the bed, you place your arms on her shoulders. at this point you were seething in excitement.

“Holy fuck.. you didnt.” her eyes practically shoot out of her head, staring at the object in the box, a white envelope sticking out from underneath. she turns to you shocked.

“How did you even-” she grabs the walkman and few tapes out of the box. you shrug, “Antique stores are great places.” she puts the cassette into the device, the one that you were able to get your dad to burn your playlist into. the others being the smashing pumpkins and nirvana.

“Do you love it?” she doesnt answer, instead throwing herself onto you, holding you tightly. holding fistfuls of your sweater, your wrap your arms around her and kiss her forehead. “I knew you would!”

after fiddling with the foreign object for a few minutes ellie figures out how to turn it on and off, she passes you one of the wired headphones and slips the other into her own ear. The polices ‘Every breath you take’ begins playing into your singular headphone. ellie added it to your joined playlist because she swears its the song that plays every time she looks at you. How corny.

You two sit for a few moments, just listening to the lyrics.

I’ll be watching you

(every breath you take)

(every move you make)

you suddenly feel her looking at you, you turn your head to meet her gaze. her eyes were practically hearts, she looked so smitten. you smile at her and lay your head completely onto the bed and ellie sits up, careful to not disconnect the headphones from your ears. “what’re you doing?” you asked in a hushed tone. she shakes her head, “Just looking at you.” her face shifts from soft admiration to something different. then suddenly, her lips are slotted in between your own.

(every single day)

(every word you say)

she gently rubs her hand up and down your side as she moves her lips against yours, your hand making its way to the side of her face. you sighed into her mouth and gently moved your arm around to the back of her neck. your legs tangled together effortlessly when she pulls away from you. “I love you.” she whispers, you look up at her, your faces almost touching. “I love you too.” you almost moan when she dips her head back down to continue kissing you.

I’ll be watching you

That Christmas ended up being the night that you took each others virginity and tried to hide it from your nosy parents, who of course, noticed right away but didn't say anything.

Your mother and father left early in the morning to go see some of your extended family, you planned to go meet them later in the day so for now you were left by yourself to wait. you anxiety was high, but the hard part was almost over. after your dinner with your family you could shove all your things into your trunk and leave. you'd be back in the comfort of your apartment before December 26th.

For most of the afternoon you found yourself lazing around, watching movies that you've seen a thousand times before. you sigh to yourself, glancing over at the clock which reads 5:00. you decide to start getting ready.

you had just finished your makeup, your hair still tied up and your body clad in pajama when the doorbell rings. How strange you thought to yourself. who could possibly be showing up for your parents at 5pm on christmas day.

“I’m coming!” you shouted from the stairs, feet quickly moving down the steps. you probably should’ve looked through the peephole before ripping the door open because to your unpleasant surprise you were met with-

“Ellie?” your eyes widen at the sight before you. your ex girlfriend was outside your door with a bouquet of flowers and tears in her eyes.

“Hi- Hey.” she looks just as surprised as you. her green eyes wider than ever. she looked different, her usually half up, half down was now cut into a thinner mullet like haircut. you had tried avoiding any news of ellie since you moved, so her look was entirely new to you.

“What the fuck are you doing here.” you asked, your voice harsh but quiet. she looks at you in disbelief, “I- Dina told me to come see you.” she whispers. Of course she did.

“Why, Ellie.” you pause, crossing your arms. “I haven't spoken to you in almost three years, and now you're outside my door. Why?” she now looks disappointed with your reaction. she had partially hoped that you would throw yourself into her arms and tell her you missed her. but she knew that would never be.

“I messed up,” she looks down at her shoes, you clearly weren't having her half asses words. you sigh loudly. before you could shoo her away dhe interrupts you.

“I did you so dirty, and- i cant forgive myself for it. but youre the only person i've ever loved, truly.” she pleads with you unbeknownst to you, as your eyes stayed glued to the ground. “Would you please look at me-”

“I don't owe you anything ellie.” you snap, you did fulfill her request however, your eyes meeting her frantic ones. “i dont have to accept your stupid apology, why the fuck would i, ellie? what you did- what you did was so wrong. and i should hate you for it.” you slowly step out of the house, your angry pointer finger meeting her chest. tears threatening to spill from your eyes.

“and im sorry, im so fucking sorry, baby. i couldn't even live with myself after what happened.” her final words making the tears finally start to stream down your face. you hadn't expected her to admit that, especially not with you practically beating your fist into her chest. but she did.

she notices your tears and grabs you by your face, she holds you as your legs buckle beneath you, something she didn't do years prior on this exact day. something she shouldn't have had to do. “Im sorry.” she whispered into your hair. her flowers now long discarded, and you crying into her arms on your parents front porch.

“Are you fucking kidding me, Ellie?” you cried, your body tensing up after her heartbreaking confession, you peered at her through wet eyelashes. and she couldn't even look at you.

“I’m sorry.” she whispered, fingers fiddling with the rings adorning her hands, the hands that held you whenever you cried, the hands that had made you see heaven just nights prior.

“You're breaking up with me cause why? ellie. im still confused as to what the fuck is happening right now.” your expression is one of incredulity.

“baby, don't do this.” your eyes widen, you couldnt fucking believe her. “Do not baby me, ellie. you’re fucking breaking up with me right now because what? did you fuck her?” her head shoots up from her lap, her bottom lip wabbling between her teeth.

“No! i- we didn't, i would never-” you scoff, rolling your eyes at her actions. trying desperately to hide the fact that she had just broke your heart into a million pieces. “Do you love her?” you ask quietly, the question you had been avoiding since the beginning in fear of its answer.

“I dunno. i just-”

“youre breaking up with me to be with her ellie so you better know if you fuckin’ love her or not.” you spit, your words harsh, but in reality you were about to have a full blown panic attack.

“I do.” she admits. and suddenly your whole world comes crashing down, four years you had wasted just for her to leave you for a girl she met two weeks ago.

your tears became heavy and all of a sudden it was hard to breathe. your vision quickly blurred, your hands shook as you lifted your glass to your lips. and your headache was hard to deny, you needed to lay down.

Your ears rung, ellie still trying to justify her unlawful acts. all you could really hear were clusters of “im sorry, Not your fault-” you sobbed uncontrollably.

Fuck you, Fuckyoufuckyoufuckyou-

“are you two ready for your menus yet?” the waitress had came out of nowhere, a sweet girl who clearly had accidentally walked in to something she couldn't just ignore.

ellie kept her head down and you made eye contact with the waitress Ruth her name tag read, “No, actually. we’re done here. Well- I am. she might be waiting for someone else.” you point at ellie, and her head raises. you quickly stand up and begin to quickly shuffle your belongings into your purse.

you wished she at least had the decency to do this in the comfort of your own home, where you could kick her out if need be, but now the entire restaurant was watching as you ran out the door with snot dripping down your nose and mascara running from your eyes to your chest. You tuned out her inescapable voice and walked all the way home.

After a long, exhausting five minutes, ellie convinced you to let her take you inside and clean you up. she wiped the mascara off of your under eyes and kissed your forehead.

“Thanks.” you muttered. “Don't mention it.” she smiled, she placed the flowers on the counter beside where you sat. you examined them, a beautiful bouquet of red and yellow flowers, like the ones she had gotten you your first christmas together. you smile at the thought. remembering your innocent love.

“what are you smiling about? hm?” she asks, you look up at her, “just thinking, about us.” she inhales a sharp breath at that. “what could've been.” you finish, reaching for the flowers, holding them in your lap.

she walks over to you, your knees now touching the front of her jean thighs thighs. “or.. what can be?” she looks down at you, an overly hopeful look on her face.

“Ellie,” you sigh, you seemed to be doing that a lot today. “I cant just let you back in like that. i mean- when did you and Cat even break up?”

“last year, october.” you nod, swallowing whatever was in your throat. “i see.” the room filling with a heavy tension. your intense eye contact has you shifting on the counter.

“Will you kiss me?” you whisper, what the fuck were you doing? she opens her mouth slightly, before grabbing you by your waist. kissing you softly, before she realized what you wanted. you moaned at the contact, and she kissed you harder.

“fuck, okay, okayokay.” she stops for a moment, you look at her confused. “are you sure you wanna do this right now?.” you nod, profusely.

she moves her hands under your shirt, quickly lifting it off your body. “No bra?” she smirks, you roll your eyes. and reach for her own T-Shirt. you slipped it off with ease, unknowingly biting your lip at the sight before you.

she grabs you again, slotting her lips between your own, you wrap your legs around her waist.

“your room?” she whispers against you, “couch.” you confirm. Ellie drops you onto the cushions, you grab at your sweats, quickly lifting your hips to get them off. ellie, preoccupied with taking her own pants off.

“fuck, you’re beautiful.” she positions her body against yours, her lips trailing from behind your esr, all the way down to your lower stomach. small praises leaving your lips at her wet kisses.

she begins to move her lips towards your clit, sticking her tongue out and licking a dtrip over your underwear. “Ellie, please.” you whimper, hips bucking up into her face. she looks up at you and begins to slip your underwear off your body.

“Fuck, youre so wet.” she observed, moving her finger to play in between your folds. you eagerly bite your lip, her face admiring you from her position between your legs. you moan softly as she begins to eat you out, swirling small circles on your soft button. “Oh, ellie!” you whimpered, your body twitching against her mouth.

“ohmygod, baby.” she moans into you, slowly slipping s single finger in and out of your sopping hole, your moans growing increasingly loud, your eyes meet her own when you entangle your hand into her hair, pulling fightly at the back if her neck.

your back arches as she adds another finger, your release so close you can feel the sweat dripping down your back. “Im cuming! ellie, ellieellie!” you scream as she fucks you through your orgasm, her fingers slightly slowing down before she pulls them out.

you beckon her between your legs again when she lift your head from between your legs, she slots her legs between yours, slowly starting ti grind into you. “missed this pussy s’bad baby.” she groans as she continues to move her hips, speeding up as she pleases. “mhm,” you moan, greedily grinding back up into her, small whimpers starting to leave her throat at the feeling of your pussy on hers.

“Tell me you love me, ellie” you ask, your voice breathy. her head snaps down, looking down at you. her movements speed up as she looos at you.

“W-What?”

“Tell me you love me.” you bump your clit against her sweet spot and she moans. “I love you, fuck! so much, i love you soso much.” she could feel her orgasm creeping up on her, she speeds up her movements between your legs. your grab at her brests, pinching her nipples between your pointer and thumb. “you gonna come?” she bites her lip, nodding at your question.

“cum all over my pussy, please ellie.” you moan loudly, her fluid slowly leaking out of her and onto you. you quicken your hips, ellies lip finding home between her teeth until she suddenly falls into you, both of you moan when she untangled your legs.

“fuck.” she whispers, looking down at the mess that spread between the two of you, connecting you. you slowly lift yourself into a now sitting position. gingerly adjusting yourself so that you don't irritate your already sensitive nerves.

“so.” ellie starts, looking over at you, her eyes again filled with hope. you sigh quietly. “So, im gonna pee and you're gonna be gone by the time im done.” you state matter-of-factly as you stand up, slipping you oversized shirt back over your body. she shakes her head in confusion. “What?! But i thought-”

“you thought what, ellie? that i was just going to let you come back? you broke my fucking heart.” you can see her starting to tear up but you ignore the fact. instead slipping your underwear back on but discarding your pants.

“i told you it was a mistake! baby, i love you!” you scoff, your lips curling up into a smile, how fucking ridiculous.

“Listen to me ellie. Im going to go pee and you're going to go home. and then, tomorrow, im going to leave this fucking town forever and i swear to god you will never fucking see me again.” you argued, ellie still sitting there, with no clothes on. you didn't think she deserved your forgiveness. You felt guilty for denying her in such a vulnerable state but you convinced yourself that she deserved it.

you begin to walk up the stairs, you can hear her stand up from the couch and slip into her clothes once again. without turning around to face her you bid your final goodbyes,

“Tell your fiancée i said hi.”

unbeknownst to ellie, you had noticed the wedding band that shined around her left ring finger. that was when you decided not to let her back in.

[mattslilies]

✩ model!reader - models for fresh love ✩

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

you pulled up to the building, double checking the address before you got out of your car and walked in. you'd had a scheduling mishap and your manager had double booked you for the day, so you swore under your breath when you noticed that you were showing up late, and for a brand you'd never worked with.

you'd seen the founder, one Chris Sturniolo, follow you on Instagram about two weeks ago, and after scrolling through his account, you'd ended up following him back.

not long after you did, you noticed him liking quite a few of your posts, and then came a ping from your phone, signaling a new message.

2:16 pm: "love all the shoots you've done, they look amazing. i have a shoot for my own brand coming up, was wondering if you wanted to model?"

you read the direct message, the gears in your brain beginning to spin. you couldn't lie, you thought chris was incredibly attractive, and you almost never turned down a good modeling opportunity.

2:23 pm: "what's the brand? would love to look into and consider it."

2:24 pm: "@/freshlove"

a fast responder, then. you scrolled through the account that he had linked, and while it wasn't the type of thing you normally modeled, you were always up for a little bit of a change, a little step outside of your comfort zone.

just as you clicked out of the page, a new message notification crossed your screen.

2:27 pm: "hope you consider it well. would love to see your face there."

was he flirting with you?

you smiled to yourself, never turning down an opportunity for a little fun.

2:28 pm: "i will. would be a shame to miss out on such a nice looking offer. the clothes are cute too."

your only response was a heart reaction to your message, and just two weeks later, here you were.

slipping your phone into your pocket, you glanced around at all the people bustling through the building, unsure of where to go.

"you showed up."

you spun around, quickly realizing it was chris who had spoken, and who you were now standing face to face with.

"yes, i did. i'm so sorry i'm running late, my manager double booked me by mistake-"

chris just laughed, cutting you off.

"don't worry about it. double booked, huh? you must be popular."

you smiled back at him, a teasing glint in your eyes.

"yes, incredibly so. you should be grateful i chose this shoot over the other one i had scheduled today."

his grin only widened, enjoying the playful banter.

"well, consider me lucky i scored such a high demand model. i'll show you where you can grab clothes, if you'd like."

"after you."

it wasn't a far walk to where the rest of the models were setting up, most of them smiling and immediately welcoming you. you settled in easily, not noticing where chris disappeared to, but putting it mostly out of your mind as you let the makeup artist do her job.

the shoot went smoothly, you being the last one to go. chris coincidentally reappeared just in time to oversee all of your photos, smiling when the cameraman showed him each one.

"how's it look?" you called, that same confident smile on your face.

you'd learned early on that insecurity gets you nowhere, and while you weren't cocky, or egotistical, you were photogenic.

"perfect." he was incapable of hiding the smirk on his face.

the shoot wrapped up, and chris showed up once again as you were exiting the changing room, the outfits you'd just modeled draped over your arm.

"pictures looked fantastic."

"thank you. are they going on the instagram?"

chris nodded. "as soon as i get them, yes."

"tag me in them." you winked, starting to head out of the building after grabbing your things.

chris shook his head, smiling, privately loving your confident but playful demeanor.

"can i walk you to your car, or are you too booked and busy?"

you waved your hand in the air, dismissing the joke with a smile.

"never too busy to have a pretty boy walk me somewhere."

quickly finding your car, you and chris walked over there, generally chatting about both his brand and your job. he seemed genuinely interested, which was a nice change of pace.

"well, this is me."

you felt a slight twinge of disappointment as you held the handle of your car door, having thoroughly enjoyed the day.

chris still held eye contact with you for a few moments, not making any move to walk back inside, before gently pressing his lips against yours.

taken by surprise, but not uncomfortable, you kissed back, feeling his hand wrap around your waist. after a few seconds, he pulled back, that same smirk painting his lips.

"i hope to see you next time i have a photoshoot."

"i'll be expecting a message."

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

a/n: this was a little longer than i expected!!!

[thefantasyride]

Holiday Bliss

Terry Richmond x OC Black Reader

I've been wanting to write something for Terry for 4 months and I wanted to post ON Christmas and missed the shit by mere seconds. I'm also a procrastinator and terrible at staying focused so I could finish this ON TIME, but I've had this idea since October so I'm posting the shit anyway. Enjoy and Merry (late) Christmas! 🎄🫶🏾

Warning(s): Smut + Fluff

Ryan and Terry decided to spend the holidays together in a cabin getaway, but Ryan had some plans of her own. 🤭

They created an advent calendar of random activities throughout the month up until Christmas Eve. Today’s activities included making gingerbread cookies and swapping one small gift and opening their stocking stuffers.

Ryan carefully iced the last gingerbread cookie before biting into it. 

Her stocking stuffers included her favorite beauty products from Sephora. Terry was sure to get nothing but gift sets. He didn’t have to do much snooping to figure it out. He paid attention to what she always bought, which ones she mentioned wanting to try, and of course what she had in her cart. Terry’s included travel minis too. His favorite hand lotion, gum, new colognes he’d been wanting to try, and a Swiss Army knife.

Terry took his phone out to snap candids of Ryan in her festive headband, robe, and socks. 

“I love your hair like this.” Terry smoothed loose strands away from her face as he stroked her cheek. 

“Thank you baby.” Ryan batted her eyelashes, making a mental note to squeeze a silk press into the hair rolodex every now and then. 

She adjusted her candy cane headband and smoothed out her silky tresses. She sat in his lap to take selfies with him.

“These are gonna be so cute in the scrapbook. I have some other pictures I wanna take too…”

Terry scrolled through the photos smiling.

Ryan stood in front of Terry as she untied her red and white candy cane robe to reveal a candy cane crop top with the matching g-string and thigh high socks. Her pierced nipples pressed against the thin material of her tank top. 

“Shit…” Terry began snapping pics as she blew kisses at the camera and did her signature duck lips with the peace sign. 

She turned around slowly to show off her plump backside. She made her cheeks jiggle as she bit her lip and looked over her shoulder. Terry leaned forward to record her little show as he took in her curvy frame. Thick thighs, soft tummy, and a plump ass with the titties to match all on display just for him.

“I have something else I wanna show you.” 

“Oh yeah? What’s that?” .

She bent over slowly to hold her ankles and shake her ass cheeks as a red butt plug with a green jewel came into view. 

“Goddamn…” 

She continued to make her cheeks move like water. “You like what you see?” 

“Hell yeah… How long you had this in?” Terry was mesmerized by the way her ass moved with the green jewel nestled in the middle. 

She giggled at the concentration on his face. “Since this morning.” 

Terry hummed as he reached out to rub her ass and thick thighs. 

Ryan kneeled in front of Terry running her almond nails over his muscular thighs, causing the hairs on his arms and legs to stand up.

“Oooh what’s this?” Ryan questioned in a sing songy tone. She rubbed his growing erection before reaching her hand into his boxer briefs. She stared into his stormy eyes as she stroked his dick until it was standing straight up. She spit on the head as she stroked more. 

“Nice and hard just how I like it.”

Terry grunted low in his throat as his dick slapped against Ryan’s tongue as she flicked it across his tip and sucked the head. 

“Shit, Ry…” 

Ryan moaned as she slurped and stroked his dick in tandem. Terry gathered her hair in a ponytail as she pressed her hands against his strong thighs and sucked his dick with no hands. 

“There you go, suck that shit.” 

She began to massage his balls after she spit on his dick and slurped it back up. The combination of her moans and slurping was music to Terry’s ears. 

“Fuck I’m finna bust.” 

“Mmmm give me that nut.” She licked the tip before sucking it again and Terry groaned and grunted as he unloaded in her mouth. Ryan greedily licked it all up. 

“Goddamn, girl…” 

Terry was still hard. He helped her up from her kneeling spot and pulled her into his lap, gripping her ass as he slipped her tongue and sucked on her bottom lip and neck. Ryan grinded against his dick, causing friction to her sensitive clit. The crotch of her thong was soaked and her nipples were hard from his touch. “I want you so bad.”

Terry positioned her on the couch the way he wanted her to get a view of her plump ass plugged up. Ryan rested her head on the back of the sofa as she arched her back. Terry pulled the g-string from between her cheeks to reveal her arousal.

“Look at you creamin’ already. All this for me?” Terry smirked as he spread her cheeks for a better look.. 

“Uh huh.” Ryan’s senses were all over the place. 

Terry lined his dick up with her slit, rubbing the tip against her clit. “Ooooh give it to me please baby.” Terry hissed as he sunk into her tight warmth and she started to bounce.

“Look at me while you throw that ass back. Pretty ass…” Ryan looked over her shoulder at Terry while her hands were planted in front of her. Loose strands from her silk press fell in her face, sticking to her glossy lips as she moaned. Her butt plug began to slip out from her arousal before Terry pushed it back in with his thumb as he delivered steady strokes.

“You nice and full, huh?” Terry teased before smacking each ass cheek. 

Ryan let out a whiny moan in response. “Mmmhmm.. It…feels s-soo g-gooood!” 

Ryan continued to throw her ass back to match Terry’s strokes. She pulled him closer to capture his lips. 

“You’re too far away. I need to feel you.” 

Terry flipped her over, pushing her legs back. He hissed as he slid back in, causing Ryan to cream even more as he hit a new spot. Terry sucked her bottom lip as she squeezed his biceps. Her eyes danced between the small gold chain in her face and his blue-green eyes.

As he leaned closer to her face to kiss her lips, she arched her back at the feeling of him going deeper.

“Oooh you’re s-s-soooo deep!” 

He pressed his hand against her belly as he stroked that spot over and over again. 

Terry took turns toying with each  nipple while rubbing her clit as he sped up his stroke.

Ryan moaned his name as her legs began to shake. “Oh my God, TeeJayyyy!” 

Terry nipped her bottom lip as he pressed into her sweet spot over and over again. “You gone cum for me? Hmm?”

Ryan's skin was warm to the touch, nipples erect, and belly tight. “Oh my God, I’m about to —” Ryan began squirting and creaming before she could finish her sentence. Her pussy clenched around nothing as she panted. Terry rubbed his dick between her pussy lips and against her clit, causing another waterfall.

“Oh FUCKKKKK!” She whined as she tried to control her trembling thighs. 

“Hm, look at that.” Terry looked down in amazement at the mess.

“P-put it b-back in…” Ryan panted as she stared at Terry with pleading eyes. 

Terry obliged as he slid back into her slowly at a steady pace. “Look at you gripping me like that…” 

Ryan clenched around him, causing his hips to falter.

“FUCK, Ryan!” 

She patted her pussy as he came inside. 

Terry leaned in to kiss her lips and all over her face before pulling out to watch their cum slide out of her.  

After their late afternoon session, they showered and fell asleep as their Christmas movie played in the background.

✨ Christmas Day ✨

Terry crunched on a candy cane as Ryan sat the cookies on the coffee table.. 

“Where you get these candy canes?” 

Ryan giggled at his excessive crunching. “You like ‘em?” 

Terry nodded as he took another bite off. “They kinda taste like Cream Savers.” 

 “I swear you’re 65 in a 32-year-old body.” 

“Nah, taste it.” Ryan leaned forward to taste the candy cane. 

“It does taste like a Cream Saver but with peppermint. I need to get these again next year.”

 “You ready for your gifts?”

 “Of course!” 

Terry and Ryan were adamant about capturing memories outside of their iPhones. Ryan took the liberty of starting scrapbooks and photo albums when they became exclusive. Road trips, vacations, random picnics at the park, all of it was captured. 

Terry had gotten more into photography recently so she gifted him a camera with all the equipment along with a sports watch he had been wanting. It had a ton of features with interchangeable bands. And it had to have military time settings, of course. Once a Marine, always a Marine. 

Terry unwrapped a handmade scrapbook that included pictures of him and his cousin Mike. They were 12 years apart, but Terry spent most of his childhood as Mike’s shadow. A small smile formed on his lips as memories came flooding back at the flip of each page. Pictures of them at the park with their other cousins, Terry’s little league games, Mike’s high school graduation, and the last family reunion before he went to jail. At the very back was Mike’s hospital bracelet along with his obituary and a few more recent pictures of the two of them. Mike was more than his cousin. He was his big brother. Terry’s eyes welled up with tears when he spotted the first letter Mike had sent him while he was in boot camp. 

“This is —” Terry paused to gather himself. “I don’t even know what else to say…” He pulled Ryan into his lap, holding on to her tightly.

She kissed his face and rubbed his back as he cried . “I know it’s been hard and I wanted you to have something that would help you remember all the happy times. ” 

Terry sniffled into her chest. “Damn, I didn’t expect it to hit me like that. I appreciate this babe.” Ryan wiped Terry’s tears before pressing her lips against his. “Anything for you, my love.” 

Terry collected himself enough to pass Ryan two slender boxes. She tore into the pretty gift wrap and opened the box to a dainty diamond tennis bracelet with her birthstone to add to her bracelet stack. 

“Babe, this is so pretty!” 

Terry smiled at her reaction. “You gotta open the other one too.”

Ryan unwrapped the small square box to reveal a 14K gold bangle engraved on the inside.

For my favorite girl in the whole wide world. Love, TJ

Ryan paused to blink back her tears. The message was so simple, but it came from her loverboy so it was uber special. She couldn’t wait to see it every day while she was getting dressed.  

“I love them both so much, baby! This is the perfect start to my bracelet stack. Thank you, Snookums!”

 Terry snickered at the nickname and kissed her forehead as she sniffled and wiped away tears. 

For the first time ever, Ryan felt completely safe. As the weeks and months went by, the guard she tried so hard to keep up eventually fell down. She allowed herself to be cared for, to have feelings, and be vulnerable. 

“Oh my God, we’ve turned each other into big saps. What the hell is this? Is this what real feelings are?”

“Shit is wild, ain’t it?” Terry chuckled as he shook his head.

 “Very. But I really love it here and I really love you.” 

“I love you too.”

Tags: @megamindsecretlair @westside-rot

I didn't have an official tag list for Terry, but let me know if you want to be added. 💕

[2amriize]

.ᐟ RIIZE reaction: going home with them for holidays ༉‧₊˚.

req: Hiiii love your work🩷🫧 I have a question is it possible for you to do (reader) coming home with RIIZE for the holidays like a reverse of your last post ?if not it’s okay

pairing: bf!riize x reader — masterlist

⭑.ᐟ shotaro

It was the first time you were going to meet Shotaro's family since you started dating, and you were going to spend an entire week with them. You couldn’t deny that you were pretty nervous, and Shotaro was well aware of it. Even though he had reassured you countless times that everything would be fine, you clung to him the moment you arrived. Still, his family was incredibly welcoming and showed great interest in getting to know you, asking lots of questions and making every effort to make you feel comfortable. By the end of the vacation, you felt like they were your second family. "When can we go back?"

⭑.ᐟ eunseok

You had only met Eunseok's family a couple of times before, but you adored the way they treated you, especially spending time with his younger brother. That’s why, when they invited you to spend the holidays with them, you couldn’t have been more excited. You loved hanging out with his mom and brother, you even went out for meals with them and explored the city together. Noticing how much attention you were giving them, Eunseok couldn’t help but hug you when you were alone in his room and tease you. "It seems like you’re more in love with my family than with me…"

⭑.ᐟ sungchan

Every Christmas, Sungchan and his family spent a week in a snowy cabin. He had always talked about how much fun it was, so you were naturally curious. When you received the invitation, you accepted without hesitation, not realizing you had no idea how to ski. You were amazed by how skilled Sungchan was. Both he and his family did their best to teach you, though you never quite got the hang of it. Despite that, you had an amazing time, bonding with Sungchan’s family and making unforgettable memories.

⭑.ᐟ wonbin

You were quite nervous about meeting Wonbin’s family, wanting to make a great first impression. Everything seemed to be going well until, while helping Wonbin and his dad prepare dinner, you accidentally dropped a plate, leaving you mortified. Even though everyone assured you it was no big deal, you couldn’t stop thinking about it. During dinner on the first night, they went out of their way to make you feel comfortable. Over the next few days, they included you in all their plans. In the end, Wonbin told you how much his family liked you, though you still couldn’t forget the broken plate incident.

⭑.ᐟ seunghan

When Seunghan invited you to spend Christmas at his home, you didn’t hesitate to say yes. Even though you spent almost every day together, this was your first vacation as a couple, and both of you were thrilled. You loved spending time with his family, but what you enjoyed the most was simply being with him. To your surprise, it snowed one day, and you all went out to build a snowman and have a snowball fight. It was a holiday you would always cherish.

⭑.ᐟ sohee

Sohee had often told you about his family’s holiday traditions, so you were curious to experience them in person. His family welcomed you as if you were one of their own, and every evening, you watched a movie together and played board games after dinner. You loved seeing Sohee so happy, yet shy when introducing you to his family. On the final night, the two of you cuddled by the fireplace, reminiscing about how much fun you had.

⭑.ᐟ anton

Anton was thrilled that you were finally going to meet his family and equally excited to take you to his childhood home. There were so many things he wanted to show you. Spending time with him and seeing his excitement as he gave you a tour of his neighborhood brought you so much joy. Your favorite part was visiting his room and listening to his mom share stories and show you childhood photos of Anton, your ultimate weakness, though it embarrassed him a little. By the end of the trip, you and his mom had agreed to stay in touch.

masterlist // taglist: @regularsuh @gacktsa @totheseok @kkumistars @taroddori @enhacolor @ladylilith @electric-hearts @astrobymarwa @layluv123 @sunflowers1610 @nctrawberries @synkjellies @ramyeonzprincess @yuzuksi

[sunnfish]

[ID: A digital illustration of the cast of Sasaki to Miyano. They are all gathered in the disciplinary committee room, talking and interacting with each other. Miyano yells distraught at Hirano, who has a hand to his temple in exasperation. Tashiro is drawing on the whiteboard while gesturing at Hanzawa, doubled over with laughter at the table. Sasaki is walking into the room, waving and smiling at Miyano, while Ogasawara lags behind him in a depressed state from arguing with his girlfriend. Kuresawa watches the room contentedly, and Shirahama ambles towards Tashiro while looking at Sasaki who had just rushed in. Papers, pencils, and binders are strewn about the tables. The illustration is rendered in mostly green-ish hues with blue-ish shadows. The artist’s signature “sunnfish” is written in the corner. /End ID]

GIFT EXCHANGE TIME YAAAAAYYYYY!!! @ssmygiftexchange hi. My gift prompt came from @kotilokiki who wanted lighthearted friendship interactions and stuff and so i decided to just. Put them all in here. All the friendship in one place (disciplinary committee room). I also couldn’t decide what color walls and floors are supposed to be so they’re also Every Color. Don’t worry about it. Anyways I had lots of fun it’s been a while since I’ve drawn anybody other than my favorite guy (tashiro). I can also now rotate the disciplinary committee room layout in my mind. I looked at so many reference photos and that room. Anyways. Peace and love on planet ssmyverse and happiest of holidays to everybody…!!!

Also: a bonus under the cut :3 just an early idea that I decided to clean up a bit :3

[ID: A digital illustration of characters from Sasaki to Miyano. It is drawn as if Kuresawa is taking a selfie; Kuresawa is in the foreground, flashing a peace sign, Tashiro is behind him, sitting on the table and turning to smile and look at Sasaki, who just walked in to talk to Miyano, who looks bewildered. It is rendered in mostly green and purple hues. The artist’s signature “sunnfish” is written in the top right corner. /End ID]

I like drawing kuresawa taking selfies. He’s going to send this to his girlfriend #yaoimoment. Like I said this was just an earlier iteration of my idea that i had before i decided to add Every Character. But it’s’ still fun :] might post it on its own in a few days too. For fun. Anyways. Peace and love on planet ssmyverse again. ✌️

[stayteezdreams]

Secret Santa

Plot: For years, someone has been leaving you presents at Christmas, and you never knew who it was. This year, you caught them in the act.

Pairing: Kwon Soonyoung | Hoshi x Gn!Reader (childhood friends > strangers > ???)

Warnings: Mentions of bullying, rumors, classic mean-girl stuff. Brief mention of possible stalker (but its not). Sort of an open-ending but its a happy one.

A/n: I try to write these ahead of time every time, but I always fail (I say the night before the day I post this as I am panicking to write it)

Words: 4.4k

As you laid the familiar Christmas themed blanket out on your couch, you thought back on how you got it.

The first Christmas after you moved into a place on your own, a present appeared at your doorstep. There was no note or tag, so you thought maybe it was a nice neighbor leaving a secret present as a welcoming gift. Inside was the blanket. Large, soft, and in your favorite pattern.

Then the next year, you received a cute stocking full of your favorite candies, and a pair of gloves and a matching scarf.

The year after that, you moved away and assumed the Christmas gifts would stop. So, when another present showed up on your new doorstep that Christmas, you started to grow more than a little concerned. Especially when the present consisted of your favorite band’s new album, and one of your favorite candles only sold at a store near where you grew up.

Asking everyone you knew, no one admitted it was them, but you assumed it had to be one of them. Otherwise, the only other option was a stalker, and you certainly didn't want to entertain that idea.

You had hoped that you would catch them in the act one time, to finally find out once and for all who it was playing secret Santa these past few years. But the presents always appeared when you weren’t home, or they were left over night. The identity of the secret Santa remained a mystery to this day.

When you returned from the grocery store that evening, you feared you missed catching them again, as a large package was sitting at your front door. But relief washed over you when you saw your parents’ name and address at the top.

Inside the package was an array of wrapped presents your parents sent, since you wouldn’t be able to see them until New Years.  

As you took out the packages, as well as various candies and home-made treats, you spotted a familiar photo in a frame you had decorated in class, a wave of melancholy hit you.

A small note from your mother was attached, ‘I found this the other day and thought you might want it.’

The photo was of you and your childhood best friend hugging, you were about eight years old. "Soonyoung." You mumbled his name softly as you smiled. It had been a long time since you had seen him.

Last you heard he got a job at a dance studio in the same city you lived. Which made sense, he was always fond of dancing. And loved to try and force you to like it too. You always wondered if you would run unto him at some point, but the city was pretty big.

Setting the framed photo on your shelf, you smiled, though your chest was a bit heavy as the memories of your last argument with Soonyoung ran through your mind.

You couldn't help but wonder if he thought of you at all, and if he ever did, did he hate you?

As the evening drew in and the sun continued to set at an alarmingly early hour, you cuddled up on the couch and started watching videos on your phone. You only intended to lounge for a while, but as you sunk deeper and deeper into the couch, you never got up. Even as the house grew dark around you, you remained in your spot.

So lost in the videos you were watching, it took a few moments for you to focus on a sound you were hearing somewhere. Finally noticing it again, you paused your video as you held your breath and strained your ears.

Your heart skipped a beat as your gut clenched when you realized it was coming from right outside your front door.

Was it scratching? No. It was more of a rustling noise.

Rising from the couch, you silently slunk to the window, crouching down as you peaked out, heart hammering. Your eyes widened in fear as you flinched at the sight of a person outside your door.

‘Oh God am I being robbed? Should I turn the lights on to scare them away?’

Looking a bit closer, you noticed they had a bag in their hands. A Christmas bag. You almost gasped as you realized it was the person who had been leaving presents the last few years. You finally caught them in the act.

Squinting, you sighed in frustration as you couldn’t make out their face. They were wearing a hoodie over their head and a mask on their face. Slinking to the door, you grabbed the door handle as softly as you could.

‘Should I?’

Nodding to yourself, you took in a breath before you turned the handle and pulled the door open as quickly as you could.

The stranger at your doorstep, fell backwards in surprise as you opened the door, you pointed at them with a yell, “Caught you!”

You expected the hooded figure to be someone you knew, a family member, a friend, a coworker. You expected them to laugh and reveal themselves. But instead, the person froze for a moment, remaining completely silent, before turning and running away.

“Wh- hey, HEY!” Without thinking you ran out your front door and after them.

The stranger glanced back, and upon seeing you chasing them let out a muffled gasp before tripping and nearly falling.

“Come back here!”

You made it about two houses away before you caught up with them as they got themselves caught at the end of the cul-de-sac. With nowhere to go, they tried to outmaneuver you and make it around you, but you managed to grab the bottom of their jacket and yank them towards you.

The momentum was more than you expected as they stumbled back and fell, bringing you with them. You grunted as you fell on your butt before rushing to grab the stranger before they ran off.

Turning them over, they started waving their hands, as if expecting you to beat them up. A voice called out from behind the mask in a desperate plea, “Wait, wait, it’s me!”

“Who is me!?” You asked as you pulled back the hood and pulled down their mask.

Revealing a startled face, you froze as you stared down at them, familiarity and realization watching you. His hair was bleached blonde, and he was older, but he still had the same eyes and the same cute cheeks.

“Soonyoung?” Your voice was soft, as you looked down at him, “SOONYOUNG?” You repeated as the full realization washed over you.

He gave you a strained smile as he waved his raised hand softly. “Hi.”

“You- what? What are you even doing here?” Your voice was full of confusion as you climbed off him.

He swallowed nervously, as he sat up, his breath a bit heavy from running. He started playing with his mask as he avoided looking over at you. “Well, I just- I-“ he was fumbling to find an answer, not sure if he should tell you everything now, or just give an excuse.

Remembering the present he left at your door, you let out a sigh, making him finally look at you. “It was you leaving the presents all this time?”

He nodded softly without speaking.

Reaching out you smacked his arm softly, an action that shot Soonyoung back in time, something he missed.

“Why didn’t you just tell me? Or knock on my door? Why leave them in secret? You know I thought someone might have been stalking me, right?” Your voice became a bit hesitant, “Y-You’re not…are you?”

He suddenly started shaking his head and waving his hands. “No, no I’m not I swear! I just… I wanted to give them to you myself, but you hate me, so….”

You felt your heart clench as guilt and familiar heart ache washed over you. “I don’t hate you Soonyoung.” Your voice was soft, sad, as you rose to stand up.

His eyes followed you, caught on to your words with everything he had. “You don’t?”

“No! No, I never hated you, I just- “looking around, you sighed as you reached out your hand to help him up, “Come on, get up.”

Taking your hand, he swallowed nervously, your words echoing in his mind. You didn’t hate him? But all this time he thought you did.

“If you don’t hate me then why did you leave?”

You almost scoffed but let it go, “You really don’t know?”

He shook his head softly, a familiar pout on his face. The same face of the boy who used to follow you around. The one who promised to marry you when you got excited at a wedding when you were nine. The boy who became your world.

The boy who broke your heart.

You swallowed as a dozen memories flooded over you. You cleared your throat, “It’s cold, I’m going inside. You can come in if you want.”

As you walked away from him, he watched you with a tight chest. The last time he had seen you, you were walking away from him. And you never came back. And it was his fault.  

Back then he didn’t know he should have followed you. He wouldn’t make the same mistake twice.

Following you, he remained close, part of him wanting to reach out and take your hand as he often did when you were children. You had always been together, until you weren’t.

It was the first time you felt your heart genuinely ache. Seeing Soonyoung hand in hand with another girl. His new girlfriend. A girl who asked him out and he said yes because he was excited to date when no one else was.

The popular pretty girl. The one the teachers loved. The girl who took your best friend from you.

No more sleepovers, no more hangouts, no more lunches together. Not unless she was there, and if she was, you were invisible.

You knew he was excited about having a girlfriend. He was a freshman and thought it would be the perfect way to start high school. What he didn’t think about was you.

You had always been afraid there would come a time when you and Soonyoung wouldn’t be close anymore. When his family moved houses, you feared it. But he was still by your side every day. Then you were afraid you’d lose touch in college, but you never even made it that far. It was inevitable. And it was heartbreaking.

Truthfully, you had feelings for Soonyoung as soon as you realized what “feelings” were. He was your best friend, and your first love, even if he had no idea, even if he didn’t feel the same. Maybe you should have told him, maybe things would have been different.

The girl he dated was terrible, manipulative and fake. In secret, she would bully you, playing tricks and starting rumors. She even blamed you for things you didn’t do. Petty things like accidentally breaking something, or pranks played on students or teachers.

She was the popular girl with a pretty face, and you weren’t. So, who did they believe?

Not only did she make your first year of high school miserable. But she took Soonyoung from you.

You tried to tell him she was a liar, that she hurt you, but he was so wrapped around her finger that he didn’t believe you. For the first time in ten years, he didn’t believe you. He told you not to lie to him, he told you to be nice to her. He was angry at you. He was never angry with you.

“You’re just jealous I’m in a relationship and you’re not! Just stay away from me if you’re gonna act like this!”

These weren’t his words, and you knew it. It was her. There was no way it wasn’t.

He chose her over you. He told you to stay away from him. So, you did.

“Fine.” That was the last word you spoke to him before you turned and walked away from him, leaving behind your best friend, your first love, your first heartbreak.

It was devastating, and so noticeable that your parents intervened. They found out about the bullying, and the rumors. They figured this was why you were miserable. So, they suggested switching you to another school. They thought you might refuse, not wanting to leave Soonyoung. But you agreed, and you left. And you never saw Soonyoung again.

Soonyoung stared at his clenched hands as you finished speaking. His heart was pounding as guilt rocked him. He knew it was his fault, but he had blocked so much of it out he couldn’t remember all the details. And so much of it he never knew at all.

But you remembered all of it. Of course you did. How could you not?

“I’m sorry.” He mumbled after a few moments of silence. He sniffled a bit as he finally looked at you. You were looking down at your lap, and he didn’t blame you for avoiding his gaze.

Letting out a frustrated sigh, he put his elbows on the table and face in his hands as he groaned. “I’m such an asshole.”

You almost laughed at his sudden reaction but repressed it. Leaning back in his chair again with a sigh, he cleared his throat. Now it was his time to explain what happened next.

“I broke up with her a few months after you left.”

Your eyes shot over to him as he spoke, you had always wondered what happened to him, but made yourself stay distant.

“I guess once you had gone, she needed to find someone else to mistreat. I started to notice it more. I wasn’t as focused on her as I was, because… I was always thinking of you.”

Your heart skipped at this, as you looked over at him, heart jolting again as you saw him staring at you.

“I was devastated that you were gone. At first, she comforted me, but it never felt very genuine, then slowly, she started to get angry at me for it. She would say cruel things, and even insulted you. Then she slipped up about starting a rumor and I realized that you had been telling the truth the whole time. She got too comfortable and thought I wouldn’t care what she did. But I did. But I cared too late, I know that. I did the best I could at straightening out the rumors she started. Eventually by our second year she was known as the mean girl, and a lot of people avoided her. She couldn’t stop her true colors from being shown. She failed a lot of classes, and I don’t even think she passed her college exams.”

Listening to him, you did get a sort of satisfaction learning about her fate. The past was the past, but the hurt was still there.

“I wanted to talk to you so badly, but any time I showed up at your house you wouldn’t see me. Then when we graduated high school, you went to a college far away.”

Guilt washed over you as you let out a soft sigh. If you had given in and talked to him, maybe you wouldn’t have gone too long without seeing him.

“I’m sorry.” Soonyoung’s brow shot up as you spoke, “If I had talked to you at least once- “

“Don’t blame yourself! I mean… yeah, I wish you had, but I get why you didn’t. I blocked out the things I said to you that day. But…remembering now… I was so horrible. How could I do that to you? I mean. I was supposed to be your best friend.”

“I was supposed to be yours too. I should have tried harder to convince you about her.”

Silence sat between you for a few moments, as you both thought of what you did and didn’t do. There was guilt and heartbreak on both sides. Equal pain given and taken.

You finally spoke up again when you remembered what triggered this conversation all together “But… why the secret presents?”

“Oh! Oh. Uhm, after I heard from my parents that you graduated and moved back to the city, I really wanted to see you, but I was too scared. They got your new address from your parents and gave it to me. I got you that blanket as a housewarming gift, but when I got to your house, I got too scared, and I chickened out.” He let out an awkward laugh, “Then I just kept doing it. It was my way of being around, without really being around, you know?”

You nodded but remained silent, chewing on your lips as so many thoughts and questions crossed your mind. It was a habit Soonyoung noticed when you were kids, seeing that you still did it made him smile. He didn’t force you to speak or react as he sat there, thinking over what you had told him.

One detail he kept going back to made him smile as his heart raced. “So…you liked me?”

You froze in all your movements as you slowly looked over at him, seeing him repressing a grin. Why did you have to include that detail? Yes, it was an important part of why you were so hurt by him, but he was Soonyoung after all. And he most certainly would not be letting this go.

Groaning as you threw back your head, you heard him giggle and your heart raced, ‘uh-oh’. As he leaned forward like he was going to interrogate you, you shook your head, “Shut up. It was just a stupid childhood crush!”

He shook his head, his tone much less teasing than you expected, “I don’t think it’s stupid.” He seemed to think about something for a moment before he leaned a bit closer and spoke hesitantly. “I liked you too.”

You blinked in surprise, “What?”

He nodded. “Yeah. I mean. After you left, and I realized you were really gone, I started to think about how I felt when dating you-know-who versus when I was with you. I realized my feelings for you had been different. A good different, though. And the longer you were gone, the more I realized how I felt. But I think I refused to acknowledge them on purpose. I mean, you were already gone, so what was the point? But, yeah, I liked you too.”

As he rambled, your heart raced, and your neck grew hot. Why was this confession affecting you so much now? It had been ten years, surely those feelings were gone now. Right?

“I- uh, hmm.” You really weren’t sure how to respond, stunned by his acknowledgment of his past feelings.

Soonyoung smiled as he leaned forward, catching your eye. He had a somewhat tentative tone in his voice as he spoke, “Should we date?”

You nearly choked on your spit as you leaned forward, shock obvious on your face. You let out a bewildered laugh. “What?!”

“Come on! We both liked each other!”

You laughed again, but it held more bewilderment than humor. “Yeah, liked, as in past tense!”

He hummed under his breath, “But is it really?”

You stared at him in silence as you swallowed harshly, your heart pounding nonstop. “What? Of course it is.”

His smile turned into a familiar grin, “I recognize that tone, you’re not sure, are you? You still like me!”

You reached out and smacked at him again, “I do not! You’re being ridiculous. It’s been ten years!”

“But that’s even better then, isn’t it?! It means they’re real. More real than just a childhood crush.”

You sighed and shook your head, covering your face with your hands as you grew overwhelmed. With embarrassment or shock you weren’t sure.

You jumped ever so slightly when you felt him gently grab your wrists. Pulling your hands away from your face, you met his gaze. “I wasn’t sure just how much I liked you in the past, but I know now those feelings have only grown. You know, like that saying, distance makes the heart grow stronger.”

“Wh- are you saying, you still- “

“Like you?” He finished for you, before he nodded with a cheeky smile. “You’re right. It’s been ten years. We aren’t kids anymore. I know better now what these feelings are. I can recognize them better than I could back then. I won’t miss it this time.”

Letting your hands go, you watched as he reached down, before setting the bag he had brought in front of you. Sliding it in front of you, he spoke softly, “I was actually planning on letting you know it was me that was leaving the presents, with this.”

Hesitantly, you reached into the bag and pulled out the contents. Your heart swelled as you laid eyes on the teddy bear you had given him when you were kids. You had tied a note around its wrist and left it at his doorstep.

His family had just moved in next door, so you left him the bear and a letter introducing yourself and asking him if he wanted to be friends. The next day he showed up with his parents, and you had been inseparable since.

Around the bear’s wrist was a letter tied to it, just like how you had done so long ago.

Taking the letter off and opening it, you spared Soonyoung a look and saw him picking nervously at his nails.

‘Y/n,

I guess it’s time to finally give up this secret gift thing, it’s been four years now. I always want to knock on your door and give you the gifts yourself, but I’m a coward. You know I always have been. I hope you liked the gifts, and I hope I don’t ruin them by telling you it was me who left them.

It’s been so long since we talked, I can’t even remember the sound of your voice. Do you remember mine? I never thought there would come a time when we would stop speaking, but it happened, and I regret it every day.

I don’t know if you will feel anything when reading this. But I just wanted to let you know I think of you every day. I always have, ever since you left. And every day I feel more and more regret for letting you go, and never fighting to get you back.

The more time passed the harder it became. I felt like if I saw you, and you saw me, you would glare at me, or curse at me, or ignore me like you didn’t know me at all. That last one scares me the most. Even if we are strangers, I still hope you remember me. I think I would die if you forgot me.

I never had the courage to acknowledge how I felt about you back then. But I think I might gain some closure if I tell you at least once. Even if I am too big of a coward to tell you to your face.

You weren’t just my best friend, or my other half. You were my first love. I know that now. Too late, I know. But I hope, maybe, just maybe, that the knowledge that I never hated you, might make whatever heartache I caused you, lessen, at least a little.

I’ll leave my number at the bottom of this letter. In case you want to reach out. You don’t have to, and I won’t blame you if you don’t. But just know. I am here. I was always here. And if you ever need me, I’m just a call away.

-Soonyoung. P.S. I miss you.

As you read his letter, you hadn’t even realized you had started crying. Not until he reached out and gently swiped away a tear with his thumb.

Looking up, he smiled softly at you, a fond gaze you used to dream about seeing again.

“See? Those feelings are still there, aren’t they?” His tone wasn’t teasing, but genuine, and loving. You noticed the beginning of tears brimming his own eyes as well.

Nodding silently at his question, his smile turned into a grin.

Getting out of his chair, he knelt on his knees beside you as he held your hands. Looking up into your face he took a deep breath. “I’m sorry I made you think you weren’t important to me back them. I’m sorry I was weak minded. I’m sorry I never sought you out, to make it right. I’m sorry it took me too long to realize you had been the most important thing in my life. I chased you away, I know that. And…I’m sorry I ran when you opened the door, but honestly you scared the shit out of me.”

You let out a bubbly laugh as he chuckled.

He squeezed your hands before continuing. “Please, let me make it up to you. I don’t want to start over, because I don’t want to forget what we used to be. But maybe we can start again from here?”

You swallowed back your emotions, uncertainly fading as you started to let go of the reservations you had held onto back then. He was right earlier; you weren’t children anymore. Maybe these feelings aren’t childish. Maybe they are real. Maybe you should try.

Taking in a soft breath, you nodded, “Alright. Let’s start again, here.”

He grinned up at you, letting out a shaky breath as his fear of rejection was replaced by relief and joy. Bringing your hand to his mouth, he pressed a kiss to your knuckles, making you giggle. Tugging your arms a bit, he spoke with an excited, yes soft tone.

“How about we have a sleepover? Like old times. We can properly catch up and maybe…”

You rose one of your brows before narrowing your eyes, “And?”

“Aaandd, maybe cuddle? Just a little?”

You bit back a laugh, but it escaped as he pleaded with his eyes. You cleared your throat as you tried to push back the growing bashful butterflies. “Don’t push your luck.”

He pouted, but it was quickly replaced by another smile as he suddenly yanked you into a hug. You wrapped your arms around his neck as you returned the embrace, emotions overwhelming but welcomed.

As he cupped the back of your head, he spoke softly, though his voice held countless emotions. “I missed you so much.”

You clenched your eyes shut as you squeezed him harder, letting out a soft breath as your heart swelled. “I missed you too.”

xx End xx

For having panic wrote this at nearly midnight before posting it, I'm pretty happy with how this came out!

((Taglist Form))

12 Days of Christmas Taglist: @multi-fandommaniac, @mbruben-stein

General Taglist: @charmsprout, @brattybunfornct, @bahng-chrizz, @otakutrash669,

@tinyelfperson, @pinievsev, @teenyfinds, @everythingboutkpop,

@shymexican, @stillwjk-channie-lixie, @alexxavicry

Seventeen Taglist: @ye0nvibezzn, @dancinglikebutterflywings

[discoscoob]

⋆⭒˚.⋆ ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS YOU

˙ ✩°˖🎄⋆｡˚ Ted Logan x Reader

KEANUVERSE SECRET SANTA: My contribution to @faerl’s Keanuverse secret santa project for my giftee @scarlettspectra! 🎁

SAN DIMAS, CHRISTMAS EVE 1992

Below a slanting ‘Merry Christmas’ banner, Ted is sprawled across the well worn, pre-loved couch, his long, gangly frame fitting awkwardly. Mismatched socked feet dangle over the edge of the armrest, while his arms drape snuggly around your waist as you nestle peacefully across his body with your head tucked under his chin. A santa hat sits askew atop his unruly dark locks that have fallen over his sleeping face.

You sniffle as the framed photo begins to gently blur from the gathering tears clouding your vision. Bill had captured the candid moment of you and Ted having a post Christmas dinner nap. How you wish you could travel back to that precious moment, nuzzled comfortably in Ted’s warm embrace. Of course, afterward, Bill had taken a permanent marker to both your faces, leaving the two of you with drawn-on moustaches until the new year — it earned Ted some strange glances when he served customers at Pretzels ‘n’ Cheese.

Carefully returning the photo to its pride of place on your nightstand, you pick up the mixtape Ted sent you. The hand drawn candy canes, forming the shape of a love-heart on the cover, brings a watery smile to your lips — reminding you how much thought he puts into even the simplest of gestures. The smooth melody of Please Come Home for Christmas by Charles Brown drifts from the cassette player and seeps straight into your aching heart, stoking the heavy swell of longing that presses against your chest.

Yesterday, Ted called you from a payphone at Fairbanks Airport with the devastating news that a blizzard was grounding all the flights, forcing him to holdover at the military base in Alaska for the holidays.

The moment you pressed the phone to your ear and he uttered your name in a quiet quiver, you knew something was wrong. Your heart sank like a boulder. He sounded so defeated. The two of you had exchanged stacks of letters filled with plans and promises of making the most of your time together over the holiday season, hoping to compensate for the months spent apart. Now, you can’t even talk to him over the phone because the lines are down.

You haven’t physically seen him since he left for military school in the spring — the longest the two of you have ever been apart since you met in high school. Both you and Bill had begged him not to go, insisting that you were happy to support him as he couch-surfed between your place and Bill’s dad’s after his own father flat-out refused to take him back in. That refusal came after he and Bill got evicted from their apartment for falling behind on the rent.

At that time, it felt like one knock back after another. With the band going nowhere, no matter how hard they tried, Ted couldn’t shake the feeling that he was a burden and a failure. His father’s relentless words would echo in the back of his mind, always there to remind him he would never amount to anything.

It had all come to a head one night after yet another failed audition to get on the bill at some music club. That’s when Ted ran into Colonel Oats. The man barely had to say a word — just a gruff “it’s not too late” — and something inside Ted broke. He was so beaten down, so full of self-doubt, that he thought it might be his only option left. A week later, he was packing for Alaska.

You had wept your heart out — not only for the fact that Ted would be miles away, but for how beat down he must’ve felt to even consider leaving in the first place. You had let him down. You hadn’t reminded him enough of how incredible he was. You hadn’t defeated his father’s voice in his head. You felt like a terrible girlfriend.

You cross the room, switch off the cassette player, and eject the mixtape just as the opening notes of Darlene Love’s Christmas (Baby Please Come Home) start playing. Ironically, most of the songs Ted had chosen were about longing for loved ones to be home for the holidays, and with him stormbound in Alaska, they’ve become unbearable to listen to.

Your doorbell chimes and you quickly check your reflection in the mirror above your dresser. Puffy red eyes stare back at you with glistening tears reflecting the glow of twinkling Christmas lights, you soak them up on the sleeve of your sweater in vain as more soon gather.

As soon as you open the door, a hard chest ploughs into you, almost knocking you off balance until a pair of strong arms swoop you off your feet — all before you even get a good look at your visitor. You would have kicked and screamed if it weren’t for the sweet scent of blue raspberry swaddling your senses, Ted’s favourite candy, inviting you to sink into his sturdy embrace.

With all the enthusiasm of a boisterous Great Dane, blissfully ignorant of its own colossal size and strength,

Ted clutches you tightly against him, his arms noticeably bulkier than the gangly limbs you recall.

He burrows his face into the curve of your neck as you cradle the back of his head, eager to delve your fingers into his thick tousled mane. Instead, they stroke over smooth, freshly chopped strands. You falter briefly, before pulling back to get your first proper look at him since he arrived on your doorstep.

“Your hair…” you blink, momentarily stunned as you drink in the sight of him. Where an unruly mop of tousled locks once sprouted and tumbled over his eyes, there’s now a military buzz cut, clipped uniformly to reveal the sharp angles of his face and stubble-dusted jaw.

You didn’t intend for that to be the first thing you said to him after all this time apart, it tumbled out before you could stop it. You wince, realising how many other things you could have — no, should have — said instead.

“You hate it.” Ted’s broad grin falters as he sheepishly rubs the nape of his neck, dipping his gaze to the floor, clearly self-conscious.

Your lips part, and you quickly shake your head, your heart hammering at the thought he might believe you could hate anything about him.

“You… your ears will get cold.” you caress his jaw, noticing the reddened tips of his ears.

Your concern eases his pink lips into a coy smile as he leans his rose-tinted cheek into your warm palm.

“Mhm… then you’d best let me in before I turn into a popsicle or something.”

Wrapping your fingers around the edge of his jacket, you tug him inside as he kicks the door shut against the cold with the heel of his combat boot. He eases his bass guitar case carefully against the wall and shrugs his heavy duffle bag off his shoulder, letting it thud softly to the floor.

“I don’t understand…” you step back deeper into the living room, still tugging Ted along with you. “How did you get here? I thought the flights were grounded.”

“Santa’s sleigh!” he jokes with a giggle, ducking his head to pepper kisses across your cheeks and forehead. His enormous hands hold you steady while his eyes sparkle with delight.

You’ve always known Ted to be affectionate — it’s undeniable that physical touch is his love language. But even by his standards, there’s a noticeable shift. As they say, absence makes the heart grow fonder — and in Ted’s case, bolder. His once restrained and hesitant displays of affection, shaped by his benign nature and lack of experience, have given way to a liberated eagerness to show you just how much he’s missed you.

“There’s this, like, total rich dude at school,” he pauses just long enough to rest his forehead against yours. “His dad’s some mayor or something, like, really important. He managed to pull a few strings and got a private jet to fly him out.”

He tucks a loose strand of hair behind your ear, his dilated pupils flicker to your neck. “And… he offered me a ride.”

“Wait…” there’s a noticeable flutter in your voice when he starts kissing the side of your neck, sending pleasant shivers down your spine. “A private jet?”

“Hm-hm…” his warm breath fans across your skin and you feel his lips twitch into a smile. “Felt like a total rockstar.”

Ted raises his head with a softening expression. “I missed you.” he murmurs, his doe eyes briefly meeting yours with timid sincerity, before dropping back to the carpeted floor.

“I missed you too, Ted. So much.” gently, you curl your forefinger under his chin, giving him a soft nudge to lift his head. As he looks up, you lean in and press a tender welcome home kiss to his lips.

˙ ✩°˖🎄⋆｡˚

Cocooned by Ted’s impressive wingspan, his chin hooks over your shoulder as his nimble fingers flit across the fretboard with a newfound ease. No longer is he serenading you with out-of-tune melodies or clumsy, off-beat riffs. Now, you’re motivated to softly sing along to the unmistakable, toe-tapping groove of one of your favourite songs.

The fluidity of his precise and controlled movements are so captivating, you’re locked in an almost hypnotic trance as your gaze lingers on his long and skilful fingers. The dedication he must’ve poured into practicing during his downtime at military school is remarkable, however, your unrestrained mind is soon bombarded with vivid images of all the possible ways you could reap the benefits of his enhanced dexterity.

Regrettably, the visions only intensify when he gently guides your far less experienced fingers along the neck of his bass while his breath tickles along the shell of your ear with soft-spoken instructions. You gulp, noticing that it’s not just the calloused tips of his fingers that are new. A fresh scar cuts across the back of his hand, presumably left behind by the whip of a snapped string — a subtle badge of honour to his devotion and passion for music.

Unfortunately, a dark cloud lingers at the back of your mind, casting a shadow over the moment, reminding you of how fleeting it is. When the new year arrives, Ted will return to Alaska and you won’t see him again until blossoms bloom on the trees and rainbows are painted across the sky after sunshowers. While you want to be content and savour the moment, there’s a throbbing ache in your chest that is impossible to ignore, it snatches your focus and prevents you from fully appreciating the time you have together.

“Babe, you totally keep zoning out.” Ted teases, cutting through your spiralling thoughts to pull your focus back to the present.

“Huh?��� you freeze, trying to buy yourself some time to come up with an excuse by feigning confusion. You’re already working on eradicating whatever outward expression you were wearing as you nose-dived through the whirlwind of trepidation.

Your Ted, ever patient and sweet, sets his bass aside with care to give you his undivided attention, attentively settling his now-empty hands lightly on your knees.

“Something’s wrong. What is it?” he coaxes, his brows scrunching with concern.

You rearrange your face into a smile, trying to alleviate that heavy pressure in your chest.

“I’m just distracted by how skillful you’ve become with your fingers now.” you tease, your smile turning cheeky as you take his larger hand in your own, pressing your lips to his calloused tips.

“Oh…” Ted gulps, his cheeks tingeing pink as he shyly averts his gaze. Even after all these years together, Ted still becomes a flustered puppy at the slightest hint of suggestiveness.

In the background, Die Hard plays on the staticky TV. Neither of you have been paying much attention, but just as Hans Gruber plummets from the window of Nakatomi Plaza, Ted blurts out, "I'm not going back to Alaska in the new year."

Your head snaps toward him, your wide eyes meeting his as your mouth falls agape.

"What?"

"I'm not going back," he repeats, and the weight of his words settles over you like the warmest blanket, replacing the suffocating mass of anxiety that had been choking you moments before.

Your face eases into a genuine, uncontainable smile as your heart leaps weightlessly in your chest. You throw your arms around him, nearly knocking him across the couch in your excitement. “I’m so relieved you’re not leaving. I couldn’t bear saying goodbye again.”

“Me neither.” Ted mirrors your smile as he secures his arms around you properly, but there’s a slight shadow in his expression — something else lingering unsaid.

“There’s, uh… there’s more,” he says, tugging himself back but keeping his hands on your shoulders.

“More?”

“I’ve um… like put in an application to the LAPD.” the excitement bubbling in your chest is replaced by confusion.

"Wait. You want to be a cop?"

Ted nods slowly.

"Like... your dad?"

Ted looks startled, his brows shoot up and he waves his hands as if trying to manually wash away the thought from your mind.

“Woah, no way! That, like- he has nothing to do with it. I mean, I don’t care about what he thinks anymore. It’s… I dunno-” he looks down at his lap, his shoulders lifting slightly in a small shrug. “I had a lot of time to think in Alaska and… I guess I was actually pretty good at some of the stuff they taught us… for the first time in forever, I felt like I wasn’t flailing around trying to figure out what I’m supposed to do with my life. And maybe… maybe I could use that to help people… like be a hero or something.”

You tilt your head as his words settle over you, still processing them. Despite his sincerity, apprehension lingers. You can’t shake the worry that he might be rushing into something else he feels he has to do — just like he did with military school. "But... the LAPD?"

"Yeah." His gaze softens, and his lips curve into that sweet, earnest smile that always makes your heart flutter. "I don't want to go all the way back to Alaska. I can't stand the thought of being away from you again until the spring. If I stay in LA, I'll be much closer… and maybe…” he pauses, his smile turning hopeful. “Maybe you could even come with me…”

Your breath hitches at his words and the endearing sight of his hopeful smile. You don’t even question the thought of uprooting your life to follow Ted, there’s no doubt in your mind, your heart belongs with his. Before you can respond, his hand drifts up to play with a strand of your hair, idly twirling it around his finger as he gazes at you, his voice softening.

“I know it’s a lot to think about, you don’t have to decide anything right now.”

“I’d follow you anywhere, Ted.” you assure him, needing no time to make up your mind.

Ted’s face lights up brighter than the Christmas lights.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.”

He pulls you into his arms again, his fingers threading through your hair with care. You close your eyes, nestling into the crook of his neck as Ted tucks his head against your shoulder.

Credit to @scarlettspectra for the headcanon that Jack Traven is older Ted if he was sent to military school. I love that headcanon so much and I had to steal it writing this so technically this is a little bit of a pre-speed Jack fic too. Chopping off Ted’s floppy hair did hurt me though 😔

My little easter egg is that the rich kid who’s father is the mayor is Scott Favor who was forced to go to military school if he wanted to receive his inheritance

[angrybathbomb]

Leander x gn! reader

MODERN AU

------------------------------------

SUMMARY: A very handsome man who introduces himself as Leander approaches you asking to do your portraits for free. Will you agree?

About the content: fluff, sfw, modern au, Leander is a youtuber who clicks portraits of people he finds eye catching on the street and is down bad for you on first sight lol

------------------------------------

"Excuse me?" 

A smooth, rich voice, warm and velvety, jolts you from your daydream. 

You lift your gaze, eyes tracing upward until they meet his. 

Standing before you is a tall, handsome man with an effortless charm. His sea-green eyes sparkle with a hint of mischief as he gives you a gentle smile.

Too busy admiring the fine specimen of a man in front of you, you almost fail to notice the camera quietly recording the entire interaction. 

An Influencer? Maybe a Youtuber ?

You raise a questioning eyebrow.

"Well, hi," he begins confidently, his tone smooth and unruffled. "I'm Leander."

"Oh," you reply, your voice flat.

He chuckles, a bit sheepish but undeterred by your curt response. 

"I'm a street photographer," he says, gesturing to the camera slung over his shoulder. "I capture portraits of people."

He pauses, pulling out his phone and holding it out to you. "Here, this is my Instagram."

Your gaze drifts over his feed—photos of people from all walks of life. 

Some faces are unique and exotic, others classic and timeless, each image radiating its own quiet beauty.

"I see," but before you can say more, something catches your eye on his profile. Your gaze freezes on his follower count.

His following was in the lakhs. LAKHS!

"What do you want?" you reply, your voice sharper than you intended.

"Uh, well, you see, you caught my eye, and... you’re quite the sight for sore eyes, so—" he begins, the practised charm evident in every word.

"Get to the point," you cut in, unamused.

Sure, he was easy on the eyes , but your stranger-danger senses were stronger than any pull of "pretty privilege" right now.

"Would you mind if I took a few photos of you?" he asks, a hint of hesitation in his smile as he gestures toward his camera.

Cute.

The gesture, of course—not him.

Well, maybe him, too.

A hint of shyness and the blush spreading on his cheeks looks good on him.

You hum thoughtfully. “Are you going to post them?”

“Yeah?” he replies, picking up on your unease.

"Is that a problem?"

Your eyes answer for you. 

He chuckles, noticing that while your mouth remains silent, your expression says it all.

How adorable…

He clears his throat, pausing as he gathers his thoughts.

Usually, he’d offer a polite "it's alright" or "I understand" with a practised smile before moving on. 

He’s willing to make an exception for you though.

"I won’t post those pictures," he reassures.

How could he not have pictures of you? 

You’d caught his eye from across the street, and before he could consciously decide to approach you, his feet had already carried him over.

Hell, he would keep the pictures for himself.

It was better that way—he tells himself.

Yet, as this thought settles, the sudden wave of possessiveness surprises him. 

Why did he feel this way about a stranger?

"Uhm," you say, nervously chewing on your bottom lip.

"It's okay if you don’t want to. I understand—" he replies, mentally sighing as he struggles to hide his reluctance to walk away from you.

"It’s fine," you say, finally standing up. "But I’m not really photogenic, so this might be a challenge." You let out a wry chuckle.

He grins, and for a moment, you swear he resembles a golden retriever.

He winks at you. 

"Oh, I love a good challenge," he replies smoothly.

Especially if the challenge is someone as pretty as you, he thinks to himself, knowing better than to voice that thought aloud for fear of creeping you out.

"Follow me," he says with an enthusiastic grin. "Let’s find a good spot for some great shots."

You trail behind him, eyes shifting subtly to the camera that’s quietly recording.

"Is that... recording?" you ask, trying to keep your tone casual.

Leander catches on quickly. Though he may look laid-back, he’s far from oblivious.

"Yes, sorry for not mentioning it earlier," he says, as if reading your thoughts. "I post behind-the-scenes videos on Insta and YouTube, along with the final shots."

You hum thoughtfully. "I see."

"Do you want me to stop?" he offers, surprising even himself. 

Normally, he wouldn’t compromise. Those BTS videos were part of his success, boosting his follower count to a whopping 17.5 lakhs. 

Yet here he was, making an exception for you. He wasn’t ready to explore why—not just yet.

"No, it’s fine," you say, with a shy yet friendly smile. "I guess that’s part of the fun in all this," you add, gesturing vaguely between the camera and the two of you.

"Yeah, it is," Leander replies with a grin, pleased to see you comfortable enough to go along with something clearly outside your usual comfort zone.

He pauses by a striking tree draped in red blossoms that stand out against the vast, blue sky. "I just realised—I never got your name.”

You give him your name, your eyes following his, towards the beautiful tree he’s been admiring.

You look back at him, only to catch him already staring at you intently.

His eyes are so deep and mesmerising that you could easily lose yourself in them.

Feeling heat rise to your face, you awkwardly redirect your gaze to the tree, not wanting your feelings to be too obvious.

Sensing his eyes still trained on you, you tease, "Click a picture; it’ll last longer."

The comment catches him off guard, but then he bursts into laughter, clearly enjoying your sass. 

“Oh, I will,” he smirks. “Now, how about you pose for me under that tree?” He gestures toward the shade beneath the tree, where the grass is dotted with red flowers that have scattered down from the canopy above.

"How should I—" you ponder aloud as you approach the tree. "Is this okay?" You lean your back against the trunk, folding your arms in front of you, still feeling jittery and awkward.

Leander smiles, ever patient. "Of course," he replies, angling his camera at you. "Now, look somewhere else, as if you’re lost in thought."

You follow his instructions, grateful for his guidance in this moment.

Click. Click.

He smiles as he looks down at the photos, whistling in appreciation.

Curiosity piqued, you take a few steps closer to see the pictures for yourself.

He hands you the camera, and you gasp in surprise.

Is that really you? Sure, you’ve taken a few decent selfies and your friends have occasionally captured good angles, but these were just two quick shots, and he already has some stunning images. It all seemed so effortless.

"Wow, you’re quite the pro," you chuckle, a smile lighting up your eyes.

There’s a hint of mischief in the crinkle of your smile, which prompts a teasing grin from him as he admires you silently.

“Pro?” he replies with mock disapproval. “You make it easy.”

 You raise your hands, amusement dancing in your eyes. "Empty flattery doesn’t work on me."

Leander raises an eyebrow, a playful smirk on his lips. “Good thing I never flatter empty—just like your beautiful smile.”

You scoff under your breath and blush, turning around and pretending to look anywhere but him.

"I'm not done with you yet," he murmurs.

You freeze as you feel his breath brushing against your neck, goosebumps erupting at the rich, velvety cadence of his voice, which has dropped a few octaves lower.

You summon the courage to turn and face him, but in the blink of an eye, he’s standing at a respectful distance.

"I need a few more photos," he says, turning to walk away and gesturing for you to follow. "This is the entertainment district; it’s hard not to find some  eye-catching spots for a good shoot.”

You fall in line behind him, a few steps back.

A bit breathless from the sudden closeness, you wonder if what just happened was real or just a figment of your imagination.

Still, you pretend to be oblivious, not wanting to succumb to delusion, even though the air between you is thick with tension and unspoken desires.

“You like birds?”

The question catches you completely off guard. "Birds?" you ask, a little lost.

Leander grins, glancing over toward an old lady holding a bunch of brilliantly coloured parrots—vivid blues, greens, reds, and yellows. 

For a moment, you feel like you're back in high school with a hopeless hallway crush, drawn in by every small detail—the subtle tilt of his head, the playful glint in his green eyes, the easy curl of his lips that you can’t help but linger on. Then there’s the scar, a faint line beginning on his cheek, running down his neck, peeking out from the rolled-up sleeves of his shirt and stretching all the way to his forearm.

"Hey, sweetheart?" He snaps his fingers lightly in front of your face, breaking your trance. "Am I losing you already?”

"Oh… uh—" You stammer, muttering a curse under your breath as you quickly glance around, desperately avoiding his gaze. 

"Yeah, sure, I guess," you say with a sheepish smile, pulling out your phone in a hasty attempt to look busy.

Leander’s gaze drops to the screen, his eyebrows lifting in curiosity—until he spots the payment app open. His eyes widen, and he straightens up. "Wait—what exactly do you think you’re doing?”

"Well, someone has to pay the lady," you chuckle, flashing a smirk. "She’s not about to hand them over just because you flashed that pretty face and charming smile."

The bold flirtation slips out before you even realise it, leaving you just as surprised as Leander, whose eyebrows raise slightly, a grin spreading across his face.

"Don’t worry your head about something so silly," he says with a wink.

You open your mouth to argue, but Leander leans in close, his voice dropping to a low murmur. “Trust me, will you?” The words are rich, almost velvety, and you can’t ignore the delicious shiver that races down your spine—it has to be intentional.

“I invited you here, so this is on me. Just relax and look pretty,” he adds, leaning back with a playful smile. He takes your hand, his touch gentle, guiding you toward the woman with the birds.

You try to steady your breathing, eyes drifting over the way his black shirt perfectly moulds to his sculpted back.

“How much?” he asks with a friendly grin.

“Five bucks,” the old lady replies, rising slowly with the careful movements of age. “Take as many pictures as you like.” She extends her hands, offering you the vibrant little birds resting on her fingers.

You stifle an "aww" as you gently take the birds, carefully placing two on your head and trying to balance them without letting them tumble. 

But managing so many little ones at once is tricky.

Noticing your struggle, Leander steps in with a grin, placing one bird on your shoulder and positioning another on your index and middle fingers.

“Thanks.”

“No problem.”

He steps back, adjusting his camera before bringing it up to his eye, his focus fully on you.

“Ready? One… two… three…”

Click.

Click.

Without thinking, you shift into another pose, gazing softly at the bird perched on your finger. Leander, not missing a beat, snaps away.

The little bird on your shoulder ruffles its feathers, alerting you and gently you  reach over and place a warm hand on it, adjusting it to a more comfortable spot. 

You can’t help as you lean in to place a light kiss on its tiny head—they’re just too cute to resist!

Click. Click.

You chuckle, raising an eyebrow. "Having fun?"

"A lot," Leander smirks, his eyes never leaving the camera.

One by one, you hand the little birds back to the old lady, watching as she gently returns them to their perch. You notice there's no cage in sight, and a small sense of relief washes over you.

“They’re trained well,” Leander comments, as if reading your thoughts.

It’s not the first time he’s done that, and it spooks you. With his sunny personality, it’s easy to forget how sharp his eyes can be.

“So, where to next?” you ask, steering the conversation away .

He gestures down the road. “Let’s find a bar—the dim lighting makes for some stunning shots.”

And now here you are, leaning against the bar counter, trying to strike a casual pose.

You debate whether to keep a neutral expression or offer a smile.

“Easy… easy,” Leander soothes, as if sensing your nerves.

"Ah, sorry," you mutter under your breath.

"No, no," he reassures, his tone encouraging. "Take your time.”

"I don’t know what to do with my face," you admit, a bit flustered.

Kiss me.

Leander quickly clears his throat, pushing that thought aside, though the temptation lingers.

"Try looking to the right… avoid looking at the camera,” he suggests gently.

You nod, turning your head to the right.

Leander watches you in the dim light, noticing how the soft, golden glow highlights your features.

He adjusts the focus and takes a few shots.

“Do something with your hair,” he says softly, “like you’re fixing it—run your hand through it.”

You follow his direction, hoping for a picture-worthy moment just as the camera shutter clicks again.

“Perfect,” he says with a satisfied smile, scrolling through the photos.

You chuckle. “I can already imagine the caption— ‘This was a particularly difficult one,’ ” you say dramatically, adding air quotes.

Leander bursts into genuine laughter, clearly amused at your humour.

“Honestly, I don’t know who told you otherwise,” he says, raising a brow. “You seem like a natural to me.”

“Or maybe you’re the natural,” you shoot back.

Leander smirks, his eyes gleaming with playful mischief.

“At photography, I mean,” you quickly clarify, feeling a sudden need to explain yourself, as though he’d read a double meaning into your words.

“Only at photography?” he murmurs with an intense gaze, lips curling into a devilish smirk.

You blink, caught off guard. “What?” You weren’t oblivious to flirtations, but you didn’t want to be delusional and get ahead of yourself.

“Nothing,” Leander says, shaking his head with a slight smile as he checks his phone. 

But the faint pink blush dusting his cheeks betrays him—he was definitely flirting. 

A surge of boldness sparks within you, and you wonder if you should indulge.

Maybe offer him your number, or even suggest a date...

“Guess it’s getting late,” his voice interrupts your thoughts, pulling you back to the present. “I’ve probably kept you long enough,” he chuckles, a little sheepishly.

He turns off the camera that was live recording, signalling the end of your time together.

A slight panic flares up—you weren’t ready for this to end. “Actually, I really enjoyed our time together,” you say, hoping he hears the sincerity in your voice.

“Did you?” he asks, grinning with a playful glint. “It’s okay, you can be honest.”

This was your chance. Now or NEVER!

You take a steadying breath. “No, really—I wouldn’t mind part two.”

“A part two?”

“Yeah,” you pause, letting the anticipation build, “maybe… a date this time.”

Your words catch him completely off guard. After a beat of silence, nerves begin to creep in, and just as you’re about to laugh it off and backpedal, he speaks up.

“I thought you’d never ask,” he chuckles, a blush paints  his cheeks again as he glances away, then back at you. “Bold, aren’t you?” he teases, mirth dancing in his eyes. “You stole my move, but hey, I’m not complaining.”

“So… is that a yes?” you ask, grinning from ear to ear, your heart fluttering.

“On one condition,” he replies, a teasing glint in his eyes, drawing out the moment.

You pause, brow furrowed. “Oh? And what’s that?”

He grins, holding out his phone. “Your number.”

You roll your eyes, playing along. “How suave. What a gentleman.”

But you take his phone, entering your number. 

“No wonder you asked me out,” he chuckles, matching your sass.

“Careful,” you smirk, typing your name into his contacts. “Don’t make me second-guess it.”

“Wouldn’t dream of it, sweetheart,” he teases, drawing out the nickname with a playful grin.

---------------------------------------------------

A/N note: I hope you all enjoyed this! I was getting lazy to post this, this was written way back in September I think lol, sorry.

Constructive criticism is appreciated as I am still finding my writing style and experimenting.

Tell me your thoughts.

[carryonafi]

keep my stocking filled.

ashton irwin x reader; SMUT

a/n: happy holidays and merry christmas to my loves who celebrate 🤍 i hope your holiday season is going wonderful so far, i’m here to give you my gift to all of you for being so patient with my crazy posting schedule. i’m not the most consistent, but you’ve all been so wonderful either way. this year has been crazy and i think the perfect way to end it is with some fluffy, lovey ashton smut. enjoy!!

words: 3.1k

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The first thing you did that morning was snatch your phone off of the bedside table and open up your emails and search for the long awaited confirmation you were looking for.

“Your order has been shipped”

You smiled to yourself, clicking the link that brought you to the tracking page and seeing that it was on its way.

“Package has arrived at carrier office”

Some of the most exciting news you could get, it kept you bouncing around the house until the hour it got to your doorstep. The squeal of excitement you let out made you glad that you were by yourself in the empty house.

What was concealed behind the dull cardboard was the brightest piece of lingerie you could ever own. Red satin with ties for the front and instructions on how to tie the panels together in a bow shape, but was also easily taken apart. The two little cats you had together, Beans and Toast were meowing curiously and already occupying the box. This was your Christmas present a few years ago, Ashton suggested he go through immunotherapy before you moved in together so you didn’t have to get rid of your babies.

“got a present for you when you get home ;)”

Your fingers glide across the keyboard of your phone like they never have before, quickly sending a text to your boyfriend with a picture of the Christmas tree you had set up and a small peek of the red silk just barely in the corner of the photo. What sparked the idea for you to buy this in the first place was the first reaction you got from Ashton seeing you in a matching piece specifically designed for being sexy, not just some undergarments, you bought and wore them with purpose. So now, it was time to add to the collection. There would be nothing like seeing his eyes sparkle so intensely when he got to unwrap that bow.

“It better be you sitting under that tree.”

“… Preferably with no clothes on. xx”

He replied back with a red heart emoji following his second text message, you giggled to yourself before typing again.

“even better”

You said with a heart of your own, then set off on your mission to try on the lingerie and practice tying the knot a few times until it was perfect. Now a waiting game, trying not to be too impatient for Ashton’s arrival. The ribbon stayed tied, wandering around with it but also making sure it was easy to come apart.

—

The moment finally came where you were covered up in a fluffy black robe, standing at the counter while trying to place some saran wrap over a batch of brownies you made just moments prior. The front door camera notification came up on your phone and you could hear the eager clicking of the front door, you had to hold back turning to look over your shoulder. When you heard his hushed voice speaking to the cats and the door shut once again, your heart skipped a beat… but god it seemed like so many.

You held your breath, but after hours of waiting you felt Ashton’s strong arms wrap around your middle from behind. He leaned his body weight against you, pressing your frame into the counter as you giggled quietly. Ashton was cold, the fabric of his jacket wasn’t too heated but you could still feel the chill sink through the fluff of your robe.

“Hi.” You said simply, gently pushing the tray of brownies off to the side and turning around with what little room you had to face him. Your arms draped lazily over his shoulders, cupping the back of his neck and lightly grazing the tufts of hair which poked out from his beanie.

“Hey, baby.” Ashton replied in this relieved tone of voice that had you blushing in seconds, the brown curls of his hair laid over one eye.. but you couldn’t bring yourself to push it away.

“Felt like forever you were gone.” You breathed, pressing your forehead to his just as he briefly reached up to take off his beanie and return his hand to your waist.

“It was forever, I missed you.” He didn’t bother ruffling his hair to fix it, but instead pressed a sweet, tender kiss to your lips while his hands massaged your hips in slow circles. You spent a few moments like this, basking in each other’s presence which doubled as warming him up due to being out in the cold. It wasn’t very long until Ashton was sliding his hands back to the front of your robe to try and undo the knot, but you hurried to stop him.

“Hold on.” You had a hand on his chest, meanwhile his eyes drew shapes all over what skin you had exposed… but he was confused. “Go to the couch.” You instructed him quietly, watching as he slowly pulled away from you and raised his eyebrows. At this point you were grinning wildly, following close behind as Ashton wandered through the open kitchen over to the sectional sofa in the living room. Now the cats were preoccupied with something else, whatever it was, you were glad that you didn’t have to shut yourselves off in the bedroom to avoid the awkwardness of two little faces staring at you.

“The anticipation is killing me.” Ashton sighed, settling into the couch and looking back at you still standing behind him. Your manicured fingertip traced the soft linen of the blanket draped across the cushions, walking around the furniture. His gaze never once broke from your sauntering figure, taking a deep, silent breath as his tongue ran over his bottom lip.

“You waited for me all day, you can wait a few more seconds.” You giggled at him, eliciting a whine of your name past that pink pout which you longed to kiss again. Finally, you stood between his knees where his legs were spread wide off of the couch cushions, socks planted firmly on the floor so you had a comfortable place to stand. “Wanna see?” You began taunting the tie to your robe with your fingers, slipping your index in the knot to loosen it further.

“Come on.” He frowned, his flaming eyes burning into yours as you finally gave into the temptation and let the tie fall loose. The robe was now slightly hung to the side as it slid from your shoulders, left first, then right, then a light thud as it hit the carpet. Ashton was in awe, reaching out to run his hands along the sweet satin bottoms and the stitch where they met your bare skin. Another shy giggle slipped past your lips when his touch tickled you and made you squirm, forming into a hum as Ashton firmly placed both hands on your hips to hold you in place.

“Was it worth the wait?” You asked, tugging your bottom lip between your teeth just while your hands fixed themselves in his hair.

“Fucking was it…” Ashton breathed, pulling you closer and motioning for you to get in his lap, to which you obeyed immediately. “How do I enjoy this properly?” He whispered, keeping eye contact as he pressed a kiss to your chest right above the center of the bow.

“That’s your choice, make Christmas your own.” You giggled, gasping once the position changed and you were on your back against the soft couch cushions. Ashton seemed to take it as a challenge, his finger hooked in the knot of the bow with a few more kisses along your collarbones… then he stopped.

“Not yet.” He muttered to himself, the movement of his lips against your skin made you sigh.

It was the warmth of the house, the smell of that sweet cookie scented candle on the coffee table and the lotion that you had put on after washing your hands while handling the brownies. Underneath the festive atmosphere was your erotic scene on the couch, Ashton’s lips had somehow reached every inch of your skin that wasn’t concealed by the satin. He blew a playful raspberry against the flesh of your hip, you gave a squeal of laughter accompanying the kicking of your legs.

“Ash!” You giggled, Ashton used this opportunity to firmly grip your thighs and hook your legs over his shoulders.

“Can’t resist you, you smell like fuckin’ cookies.” He grinned back at you, his fingers hooking in the nice trim waistband of your panties.

“Well I tried to go for vanilla… it’s the lotion you got me.” You whispered, propping yourself up on your forearms as you looked down at his smiling face.

“Hm, it only means you smell good enough to eat.” Ashton started to pull your panties down, only teasing himself as you lifted your hips to help him.

“Is that what you’re gonna do to me?”

“Mmhmm. Lay down.” Ashton mumbled against your hip, one hand moving up your core to gently press down. So you gave in and laid down all the way with a soft smile on your face, the lace was finally gone and Ashton was back to kissing you. He traced shapes on your inner thighs, hips and lower stomach, just teasing and making you arch into his touch.

“You’re so gorgeous, do you know how gorgeous you are?”

“Shut up,” you whined. Ashton’s lips got way too close to your core too many times for you to count, you weren’t going to wait much longer.

“That’s not nice, I thought this was my gift…” He squeezed your thighs and hid his smile behind another few kisses, but no response came to mind so all you did was huff and lay your head back again.

Finally, just finally after a tug on his hair Ashton pressed his lips to your entrance and kissed again. Not much, but close.

“Oh my god…” You choked out in half frustration, but Ashton was getting the hint and picking up the slack. His tongue moved tentatively, fingertips leaving rough indents in your thighs as he buried himself in your heat. Those frustrated groans melted away, he had you moaning and arching your back to get more and more out of him. Ashton obeyed with every cue, never letting go of your legs for a second… something in you gave a slight feeling that he wouldn’t be done with you after this.

Ashton was a man on a mission, not giving a single thought to the way his stubble might start to rough up your inner thighs due to his aggression, not like it was a problem. The problem was that it drove you further to your finish, making the moment shorter.

“W— Wait! No… not yet—“ You gasped, trying hard to tug on Ashton’s hair and pull him off. He didn’t relent, he kept going until you were holding it in and finally letting the overstimulation crash down. Ashton was clearly enjoying it, he groaned with satisfaction at your taste and slowed down to guide you through that orgasm. When he poked his head up, he had this cheeky little smile on his face. The one where his dimples showed, the one that made you smile back despite how breathless you were.

“I think I’m going to unwrap my present now…” He hummed, his hands following the curves of your sides. You were about to speak, but he shook his head. “And don’t you say anything either, I’m taking my time.”

You rolled your eyes playfully. “So much drama.”

“Mhm.” Ashton hummed to shut you up, leaning down over your quivering form to kiss you softly, stark in contrast to how he was just using his mouth moments before. His fingers played with the bow, running his fingertips over the knot and giving it a playful tug. He had to stop kissing you in order to focus on the bow, his eyes darting down to pull it loose with bated breath. The bottom hem stayed around you, which meant he had to carefully unclip the front as well.

“Merry Christmas.” You giggled at the childlike wonder on his face, his eyes roaming over your body and taking in every small detail.

“Best present ever, you’re just… always the best,” Ashton was fumbling, it was so cute… you laughed again and shook your head.

“Don’t make this sappy, we’ll be sappy tomorrow.” You sealed that promise with another kiss to his lips, and he came back with another.

“I can be sappy and fuck you into the couch, don’t you know how good at multitasking I am?” He sassed, nudging his nose against yours as your hands ran over his jaw and gently scratched his cheeks.

“I guess you have to be if…” You looked down, his belt was undone and his jeans were to his knees. The only telling sign of this was how much he was moving around to get them down.

“Merry Christmas.” Ashton mocked you, he grunted once he earned a playful smack to the chest.

“I don’t see a fancy bow down there.” It was your turn to sass back, but no matter how much you bickered or teased each other, nothing was bumpy. It was all smooth sailing and you moved along just like normal, Ashton was very good at multitasking, since his boxers were gone in a few seconds as well.

“I said I’m good at multitasking, not this whole… show like you put on.” He propped one hand next to your head, but his statement made you laugh before realizing he had just slipped between your legs in one motion. You choked out a breath in the middle of your giggling, eyes closing as you got used to the feeling.

“Oh—! F.. Fuck you…” This had to have been the second time that he caught you off guard, Ashton smiled that mischievous little smile again and kissed the corner of your mouth.

“Sorry, precious.” He whispered, continuing those kisses on your cheek and along your jaw. You gasped as he moved his hips a bit further, hands on his shoulders, gripping tightly and digging into his shirt.

“Mh, take it off— take it off.” You pleaded, Ashton obeyed and practically tore his shirt off over his head, immediately getting back into position. Thank god, was all you could think. Your hands returned to his shoulders, drifting towards his collarbones as Ashton started to thrust and thoroughly pleasure you. He made a sound, like a quiet growl against your neck with both hands planted firmly on the couch cushions. Whatever it was, it was hot and got you moaning back in response.

“Squeezin’ me, baby. Like I’ve never fucked you before.” He muttered, latching onto your pulse point to muffle a moan. The only lights that were on were the Christmas lights and the ones above the kitchen counter, the living room only holding a soft glow which made the contours of Ashton’s back and shoulders look delectable.

“I… I really love you,” You whimpered, trying to speak but each thrust almost made you unable to form a coherent sentence.

“‘M trying to dirty talk over here, baby. Thought you said no getting sappy?” Ashton smiled against your neck, nibbling at your skin to make you stumble over your words again.

“Wasn’t… hm— jus’ say it back.” You protested, your nails leaving scratch marks down his chest as you gathered enough strength to hoist your legs up a bit higher around his waist.

“I know, I know… I love you too.” Ashton whispered, his own words failing to sound out together. His breathing picked up, hot against your neck as did the pistoning of his hips.

You were left in a haze, tilting your head to bury your face in Ashton’s hair and moaning against those soft, sandalwood scented curls. Just a little more, you begged him quietly for just a little more to get you through to your second orgasm.

“Ashton…” You gasped, wrapping your arms around his neck as he left you with no choice, his chest was pressed to yours so he could whisper in your ear.

“Shh, let it go.” He kissed your hair, his hips stuttering. “I’ll be right behind you, sweetheart, Paint my pretty girl white, how does that sound?” Ashton cooed in that tone that had you melting, you were putty in his hands as you whined and came around his cock. That delicious pulse inside you, you knew he would keep his promise. He smiled like you had just made him proud, straightening his arms and pushing himself up. “My good girl. I won’t make you flip over, as long as you promise to look at me.”

“I promise,” you whimpered, maintaining eye contact as Ashton pulled out. You let out another sound at the loss, but quickly brought back on track as he cupped your face and wrapped a firm hand around his shaft.

“Stay just like that, exactly, look at you…” He praised, chest heaving with each labored breath he took. The sight of your flushed cheeks and watering eyes drove him mad. Plump, kiss swollen lips that he had bruised from his affection, it all made him feel so possessive. With one final moan he covered your torso in his release, making sure you got every drop as the warmth made you shiver. Ashton got down again to kiss you one last time, to claim those gorgeous pink lips and securely wrap both arms around you. Just a bit ago you were so well put together all for him, it was quite award winning to see you such a mess after he was finished with you.

“This is what I like to see…” Ashton hummed, suckling on your jaw and leaving one last dark mark of his property. You were still in a bit of a daze, only speaking when he pulled away to look at you.

“Merry Christmas?” You giggled, having said that for the 5th time tonight. Ashton laughed along with you and helped you adjust your position on the couch so you were both lying comfortably.

“You got any more fun surprises for me?” He traced your cheekbone. You tapped your chin playfully, looking up at the ceiling.

“Mm… the brownies are done?” You offered, that got Ashton hooked.

“Okay, okay. Let’s lay here for just another minute.” He promised, having to reel himself in from the temptation of brownies as you laughed at him and held him a bit closer than before. It was too nice and warm to leave your cocoon under the Christmas lights, apparently, the chocolate wasn’t tempting enough.

[margeoww]

So like queen idk if u have instagram but like recently the leclercs went to Mexico so can we maybe get smthn REALLL angsty where its like carlos x leclerc reader and she’s not too close to the family. (not on her part mainly charles and arthur) and they go on vacation without telling her and she’s like sad. You can have more ending if u want

💐 anon

a/n: okay, let me know if this is what you wanted. because I understand the point but not too much.

Left Behind

back to my masterlist

pairing: carlos sainz x leclerc!reader

summary: left out of a family vacation, you confront Carlos about the secrecy and the growing distance with your brothers. Tensions rise, but Carlos’ heartfelt apology offers a chance for reconciliation and understanding.

warnings: angst, themes of exclusion and insecurity, emotional confrontation.

The early morning sunlight crept through the curtains of your shared apartment in Mónaco, but the warmth on your face did little to ease the growing heaviness in your chest. You scrolled through Instagram absentmindedly, your feed filled with glimpses of familiar faces. Your brother, Charles and Arthur. Both smiling and laughing under the mexican sun.

Charles had posted a picture of himself sipping on a cocktail by the pool, Arthur had shared a video of their group riding ATVs through the desert, and then there was Carlos—your boyfriend of two years—posing in the same photos, his trademark smile shining brighter than the sun.

And yet, no one had told you about the trip.

Not a single word.

Your throat tightened as you swiped through the posts. You hadn’t even known they were leaving Monaco, let alone heading off to Mexico. What hurt most wasn’t the secrecy — it was the reminder that, despite your efforts, you were still an outsider in your own family.

You’d always known that Charles and Arthur shared a bond you could never quite penetrate. They were close, the kind of brothers who had their own language, their own inside jokes. As their sister, you loved them deeply, but there had always been a sense of distance, a silent barrier that set you apart.

And Carlos… he had fit into their world so seamlessly. You’d seen it from the beginning, the way he joked with Charles like they’d been friends forever, the way Arthur looked up to him. Sometimes it felt like Carlos belonged with them more than he belonged with you.

You sighed, setting your phone aside and staring blankly at the ceiling. The questions swirled in your mind, each one cutting deeper than the last.

Why didn’t they tell me? Did they think I wouldn’t care? Or… did they just not want me there?

The sound of the front door opening pulled you from your thoughts. Carlos walked in, a small carry-on bag in hand. His face lit up when he saw you, but his smile faltered when he noticed the expression on your face.

—Mi amor. —he greeted, stepping closer. —What’s wrong?

You crossed your arms, leaning against the kitchen counter. —You tell me, Carlos. How was Mexico?

His eyes widened slightly, caught off guard by your tone. —Mexico? How did you—

—Instagram. —you interrupted, holding up your phone. —Charles and Arthur have been posting non-stop. Seems like everyone had a great time. Everyone but me.

Carlos sighed, running a hand through his hair. —I can explain—

—Can you? —you snapped, your voice trembling.

—It wasn’t like that. —Carlos began, his tone pleading. —It was a last-minute thing. Charles invited me—

—And you didn’t think to invite me?

Carlos hesitated, guilt flashing in his eyes. —It wasn’t my place to invite you. It was your family’s trip, not mine.

The words stung, each one hitting like a blow to the chest. —My family —you repeated bitterly. —Right. The family that always makes me feel like I don’t belong.

Carlos stepped closer, his expression softening. —That’s not true—”

—Isn’t it? —you challenged, tears brimming in your eyes. —They didn’t want me there, Carlos. And you went along with it. Do you have any idea how that feels?

He reached for you, but you took a step back. —I thought you were on my side. I thought… I thought I could count on you.

—Mi amor… —Carlos said softly, his voice heavy with regret. —I never wanted to hurt you. If I had known this would upset you—

—You should have known —you cut him off. —You should have thought about how I’d feel. But you didn’t.

The tension in the air was suffocating, the silence between you deafening. Finally, Carlos broke it.

—You’re right —he admitted in a whisper.

His apology caught you off guard, the sincerity in his voice cutting through your anger. You looked at him, searching for any hint of dishonesty, but all you saw was regret.

—I love you —he continued, stepping cautiously closer. —And I never want you to feel like you’re not enough. Not with me, not with anyone.

Your resolve faltered, but his words didn’t fill the emptiness in your chest. You took a small step back, letting the distance between you speak for itself.

—I don’t know if it’s that simple, Carlos —you whispered, avoiding his gaze. —I can’t keep feeling like an outsider.

Carlos froze, his expression pained. He opened his mouth as if to say something, then stopped. He took a breath, and his shoulders slumped slightly.

—I’ll do whatever it takes. —he said quietly. —But only if you let me.

You didn’t respond, your thoughts a tangled mess of emotions. The love you felt for him was still there, but so was the hurt, the lingering doubt.

Carlos nodded, his jaw tight, his eyes filled with understanding—and fear. —Take all the time you need.

He didn’t try to close the distance again, and you didn’t move to close it either. Instead, you stood there, two people caught in the uncertainty of what came next.

The only sound in the room was the faint hum of the city outside, a reminder that the world kept turning even as yours felt stuck in limbo.

[maxverstappendefender]

winter wishes // ln4 smau

description: girlfriend!reader x ln4 go on a ski trip that takes an even better than expected turn

tw: none that i know of

a/n: i hope you all had an amazing christmas (if you celebrate)! i don't own any photos used. part of my december fic series called winter in the fast lane

masterlist

winter in the fast lane masterlist

liked by landonorris, martingarrix, and 11,308 others

youruser: snow trip = in progress... teaching lando to snowboard = fail

tagged: landonorris

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maxfewtrell: HE ATE ITTTT

↳ youruser: absolute highlight of the trip

↳ martingarrix: he was so cocky before too lmao

↳ landonorris: i do not feel safe here.

↳ user1: someone save lando

landonorris: damn, had to out me like that?

↳ youruser: i still love you bby

↳ user2: they're so cute

↳ user3: when will it be my turn

user4: the second photo just called me single

↳ user5: same

liked by youruser, maxfewtrell, and 2,184,620 others

landonorris: ski trip 2k24

tagged: martingarrix, youruser

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youruser: aww you and martin in the first photo!!

↳ martingarrix: me and my man!!

↳ landonorris: excuse you martin

↳ user6: they should be fighting for yn, not each other

↳ user7: literally.

maxfewtrell: where am i in this dump?!

↳ landonorris: not here.

↳ user8: ouch

user9: his own girlfriend not being first in the dump is killing me

liked by landonorris, maxfewtrell, and 14,984 others

youruser: boyfriend appreciation post since everyone thinks we hate each other

tagged: landonorris

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maxfewtrell: me and p have nothing on you too

↳ landonorris: at least you're aware

↳ youruser: nooooo, you two are too cute

↳ user10: goated friendgroup

landonorris: AWWW LY BABYYY

↳ user11: can't even spell it out lmao

landonorris: BEST GF EVERRRRR

↳ youruser: i can see you commenting

↳ youruser: stop drinking

↳ user12: called out

user13: they're so cute

↳ user14: prob not gonna last much longer

liked by user15, user16, and 8,129 others

ln4fan: lando spotted out shopping! allegedly seen at a jewelry store....

comments turned off

liked by maxfewtrell, carlossainz55, and 2,497,201 others

landonorris: MERRY CHRISTMAS FROM MR. NORRIS AND SOON-TO-BE MRS. NORRIS. haters get fucked.

tagged: youruser

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mclaren: congrats!!

carlossainz55: little lando is not so little anymore

maxfewtrell: thank god!!! thought she was going to say no

↳ landonorris: read my caption mate

↳ youruser: i would never say no

↳ user17: max is being messy lol

youruser: LOML AND CANNOT WAIT TO MARRY YOU

↳ landonorris: will be the best day of my life

martingarrix: photo creds to me!

[riinasawayama]

mingyu for arena homme+ korea march issue

[rottengurlz]

leona and her soon to be dead husband

before!!!!

[divine--intervention]

[pineapplefulfillseveryneed]

Sparks tour 2023