#love of my lifes writes very good fanfics of them and also makes them go through heart wrenching torment
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candycane969 · 5 months ago
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Just realised Ive never posted this! I wanted to draw a little something for my boyfriend, and so I drew his beloved leosagi (and put them in our clothes) I hope you'll like it! no dramatic lighting version under the cut
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cybernaght · 1 year ago
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The fandom echo chamber: fanon, microanalysis and conspiracy brain 
As someone who has been in fandom spaces, on and off, for 20 years, I find some fascinating trends popping up in the last decade that I thought to be fandom-specific but clearly aren’t. So, I would like to do a little examination of where those things come from, how they are engaged with, and what it says about the way we consume media. This is a think piece, of sorts, with my brain being the main source. As such, we will spend some time down the memory lane of a fandom-focused millennial.
This is largely brought about by Good Omens. But it’s also not really about Good Omens at all.
Part one. Fanon.
The way we see characters in any story is always skewed by our very selves. This is a neutral statement, and it does not have a value judgement. It’s simply unavoidable. We recognise aspects of them, love aspects of them, and choose aspects of them to highlight based entirely on our own vision of the universe. 
Recognition comes into this. There is a reason so many protagonists of romance novels have a “blank slate” problem. Even when they do not, we love characters who are like us or versions of us that we would like to be. And when we say “we”, I also mean, “me”. 
(I remember very clearly this realisation hit me after a whole season of Doctor Who with writing which I hated utterly when I questioned why I still clung so incredibly hard to Clara Oswald as my favourite companion. Then I looked at myself in the mirror. Oh. Well. That would do it, wouldn’t it?)
Then, there is projection, and, again, this is a neutral statement. Projection exists, and it is completely normal and, dare I say it, valid way of engaging with — well, anything. Is the character queer? Trans? Neurodivergent? Are they in love? Do they like chocolate? Are they a cat person? Well, yes, if this is what the text says, but if the text does not say anything… You tell me. Please, do tell me. Because, in that moment of projection, they are yours. 
And then, there is fandom osmosis, and that is the most fascinating one of them all, the one that is not very easy to note while you are inside the echo chamber. It’s the way we collectively, consciously or not, make decisions on who or what the characters are, what their relationships are, and what happens to them.  
(Back when I was writing egregiously long Guardian recaps on this blog I actually asked if Shen Wei’s power being learning actually was stated anywhere in the canon of the show. Because I had no idea. I have read and reread dozen of fanfics where that is the case, and at some point through enough repetition, it became reality.)
We are all kind of making our own reality here, aren’t we? 
Back when things were happening in a much less centralised manner - in closed livejournal groups, and forums of all shapes and sizes - I don’t remember there being quite as much universally agreed upon fanon. Frankly, I don’t remember much of universally agreed upon anything. But now, everything is in one place: we have this, and we have AO3, and it’s wonderful, it really is so much easier to navigate, but it’s also one gigantic reality-shifting echo chamber, with blogs, reblogs, trends, and rituals. 
Accessibility plays its part, too. If you were, say, in Life on Mars (UK) fandom between seasons, and you wanted to post your speculation fic, you had to have had an account, and then find and gain access to one of the bigger groups (lifein1973 was my poison, but ymmv), and then, if you feel brave you may post it, but also, you may want to do so from your alt account if you wanted to keep yours separate, and then you would have to go through the whole process again. And I’m not saying that fan creations then were somehow inherently better for it than fan creations now (although Life on Mars Hiatus Era is perhaps a bad example - because some of the Speculation Fic there was breathtaking), but there is something to say about the ease of access that made the fandoms go through a big bang of sorts.
(I mean, come on, I can just come here and post this - and I am certain people will read it, and this blog is a pandemic cope baby about Chinese television for goodness sake.)
The canon transformations that happen in the fandom echo chamber truly are fascinating to witness as someone who is more or less a fandom butterfly. I get into something, float around for a bit, then get into something else and move on. I might come back eventually when the need arises, but I don’t sustain a hiatus mind-state. This means that when I float away and return, I find some very intriguing stuff.
Let’s actually look at Good Omens here. Season two aired, and I found it spectacular in its cosy and anguished way; deliberately and intelligently fanfic-y in its plot building; simple but subversive, and so very tender. (I will have to circle back to this eventually, because, truly, I love how deliberately it takes the tropes and shatters them - it’s glorious). And, to me - a person who read the book, watched the first season, hung around AO3 for a few weeks and moved on - absolutely on-point in terms of characterisation. 
So imagine my surprise when the fandom disagreed so vehemently that there are actual multi-tiered theories on how characters were not in possession of their senses. Nothing there, in my mind, ever contradicted any of the stated text, as it stood. This remained a strange little mystery until I did what I always do when I flutter close to an ongoing fandom.
I loaded AO3 and sorted the existing fic by popularity. And there it was, all there: the actual earth-shattering mutual devotion of the angel and the demon; willingness to Fall; openness and long heart-aching confession speeches. There was all of the fanon surrounding Aziraphale and Crowley, which, to me, read as out of character, and to one for whom they became the reality over the last four years, read as truth. 
Again, only neutral statements here. This is not a bad thing, and neither this is a good thing, this is just something that happens, after a while, especially when there are years for the fandom-born ideas to bounce around and stew. I can’t help but think that so much of what we see as real in spaces such as this one is a chimaera of the actual source and all the collective fan additions which had time and space to grow, change, develop, and inspire, reverberating over and over again, until the echoes fill the entirety of the space. 
Eventually, this chimaera becomes a reality. 
Part two. Microanalysis 
Here are my two suppositions on the matter:
1. Some writers really love breadcrumb storytelling. 
Russel T Davies, for instance, on his run of Doctor Who (and, if you are reading it much later - I do mean the original one), loved that technique for his seasonal arcs. What is a Bad Wolf? Who is Harold Saxon? Well, you can watch very very carefully, make a theory, and see it proven right or wrong by the end of the season. 
Naturally, mystery box writers are all about breadcrumb storytelling: your Losts and your Westworlds are all about giving you snippets to get your brain firing, almost challenging you to figure things out just ahead of the reveal. 
2. We, as humans, love breadcrumbs.
And why wouldn’t we? Breadcrumbs are delicious. They are, however, a seasoning, or a coating. They are not the meal. 
Too much metaphor?
Let’s unpack it and start from the beginning.
Pattern recognition colours every aspect of our lives, and it colours the way we view art to a great extent. I think we truly underestimate how much it’s influenced by our lived experiences.
If you are, broadly speaking, living somewhere in Western/North-Western Europe in the 14th century, and you see a painting in which there is a very very large figure surrounded by some smaller figures and holding really tiny figures, you may know absolutely nothing about who those figures are, but you know that the big figure is the Important One, and the small ones are Less Important Ones, and the tiny ones are In Their Care. You know where your reverence would lie, looking at this picture. And, I imagine, as someone living in the 14th century, you may be inspired to a sense of awe looking at this composition, because in the world you live in, this is how art works. 
If you, on the other hand, watch a piece of recorded media and see the eyes of two characters meet as the violins swell, you know what you are being told at that moment. You don’t have to have a film degree to feel a sort of way when you see a green-tinged pallet used, when cross-cuts use juxtaposing images, or notice where your focus is pulled in any given shot. This stuff - this recognition of patterns - has been trained into us by the simple fact that we live in this time, on this planet, and we have been doing so long enough to have engaged recorded media for a period of time. 
As humans, we notice things. Our brains flare up when they see something they recognise, and then we seek to find other similar details and form a bigger picture. This often happens unconsciously, but sometimes it does not. Sometimes we do it on purpose: finding breadcrumbs in stories is a little bit like solving a mystery. It allows us to stretch that brain muscle that puts two and two together. It makes us feel clever. 
So yes, we love breadcrumbs, and, frankly, quite a lot of storytelling takes advantage of this. It’s very useful for foreshadowing, creating thematic coherence, or introducing narrative parallels and complexity. It’s useful for nudging the viewer into one or the other emotional direction, or to cue them into what will happen in the next moment, or what exactly is the one important detail they should pay attention to.
Because this is something media does intentionally, and something we pick up both consciously and not, it is very hard to know when to stop. We don't really ever know when all of the breadcrumbs have been collected. It becomes very easy to get carried away. There is a very specific kind of pleasure in digging into content frame by frame, soundbite by soundbite, chasing that pleasure of finding. 
But it is almost never breadcrumbs all the way down. They are techniques to help us focus on the main event: the story. I truly believe those who make media want it to reach the widest possible audience, and that includes all of us who like to watch every single thing ever created with our Media Analysis Goggles on and those who are just here to enjoy the twists and turns of the story at the pace offered to them. And I think, sometimes in our chase to collect and understand every little clue we forget that media is not made to just cater for us.
One can call it missing a forest for the trees. But I would hate to mix my metaphors, so let’s call it missing a schnitzel for the breadcrumbs. 
Part three. The Conspiracy Brain. 
If you are there with me, in the midst of the excited frenzy, chasing after all those delicious breadcrumbs, then patterns can grow, merge together, and become all-encompassing theories. Let’s call them conspiracy theories, even though this is not what they truly are.
So, why do we believe in conspiracy theories?
One, Because We Have Been Lied To. 
All conspiracies start with distrust.
If you are in fandom spaces - especially if you are in fandom spaces which revolve around a queer fictional couple - especially-especially if you have been in such spaces for a period of time, you have most certainly been lied to at one point or another. 
We don’t even have to talk about Sherlock - and let’s not do that - but do you remember Merlin? Because I remember Merlin. Specifically, I remember the publicity surrounding the first season, with its weaponised usage of “bromance” and assertions that this whole thing is a love story of sorts, and then the daunting realisation that this was all a stunt, deliberately orchestrated to gather viewership. 
And, because we were lied to in such a deliberate manner for such an extensive period of time, I genuinely believe that it forever altered our pattern recognition habits, because what was this if not encouragement to read into things? Now we are trained to read between the lines or see little cries for help where they might not be. Because we were told, over and over again, that we should.
(Yes, I think we are all existing in these spaces coloured by the trauma of queer-bating. I am, however, looking forward to a world where I can unlearn all of that.)
Two, Cognitive Dissonance.
The chain reaction works a bit like this: the world is wrong - it can’t possibly be wrong by coincidence - this must be on purpose - someone is responsible for it.
Being Lied To is a preamble, but cognitive dissonance is where it all originates. In so many cross-fandom theories I have noticed a four-step process:
A) this is not good
B) this author could not have made a mistake 
C) this must be done on purpose
D) here is why 
(Funny thing is, I have been on the receiving end of the small conspiracy spiral, and it is a very interesting experience. Not relevant to this conversation is the fact that a lot of my job revolves around storytelling. What is relevant is that my hobbies also revolve around storytelling. And one of them is DnD. Now, imagine my genuine shock when one of the players I am currently writing a campaign for noticed a small detail that did not make a logical sense within the complexity of the world, and latched on to it as something clearly indicating some kind of a secret subplot. Their thinking process also went a bit like this: this detail is not a good piece of writing — this DM knows how to tell stories well — this is obviously there on purpose. It was not there on purpose. I created a clumsy shorthand. I erred, in that pesky manner humans tend to. And, seeing this entire thought process recited to me directly in the moment, I felt somewhere between flattered and mortified.)
This whole line of thinking, I think, exists on a knife’s edge between veneration and brutal criticism, relentlessly dissecting everything “wrong”, with a reverent “but this is deliberate” attached to it like a vice, because it is preferable to a simple conclusion that the author let you down, in one way or another. 
Three, Intentionality 
I believe that there is no right or wrong way of engaging with stories, regardless of their medium, and assuming no one gets hurt in the process. While in a strictly academic way, there is a “correct” way of reading (and reading into) media, we here are largely not academics but consumers; consumption is subjective.
However, this all changes when intentionality is ascribed. 
The one I find particularly fascinating is the intentionality of “making it bad on purpose” because, as open-minded as I intend to always be, this just does not happen.
It certainly does not happen in long-form media. Even in the bread-crumb mystery box-type long-form media. 
When television programs underdeliver, they also underperform, and then they get cancelled.
If all the elements of Westworld Season 4 that did not sit together in a completely satisfactory way were written deliberately as some sort of deconstruction for the final season to explore, then it failed because that final season will now never come.
(There will likely never be a Secret Fourth Episode.)
And look, I am not here to refute your theories. Creativity is fun, and theorising is fantastic. 
But, perhaps, when the line of thought ventures into the “bad on purpose” territory, it could be recognised for what it is: disappointment and optimism, attempting to coexist in a single space. And I relate to that, I do, and I am sorry that there is even a need for this line of thinking. It’s always so incredibly disappointing that a creator you believed to be devoid of flaws makes something that does not hit in the way you hoped it would. It’s pretty heartbreaking. 
Unfortunately, people make mistakes. We are all fallible that way. 
Four, Wildfire.
Then, when the crumbs are found, a theory is crafted, and intentionality is ascribed, all that needs to happen is for it to catch on. And hey, what better place for it than this massive hollow funnel that we exist in, where thoughts, ideas and interpretations reverberate so much they become inextricable from the source material in collective consciousness. 
Conspiracy theories create alternate realities, very much like we all do here. 
So where are we now?
I am not here to tell you what is right and what is wrong; what is true, and what is not. We are all entitled to engage with anything we wish, in whichever way we wish to do it. This is not it, at all. 
All I am saying is… listen.
Do you hear that echo? 
I do. 
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froggiewrites · 2 months ago
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May I request some Luffy smut? Maybe including some aphrodisiac of some kind or influence from a devil fruit- I don't mind! I'd just love to see your ideas
I am SO sorry this has taken so long, thank you to everyone who's sent in requests for being so patient. Life has been kicking my ass this month so badly I haven't even been able to read any fanfic, let alone write it. Fingers crossed that the end of November is kinder than the beginning!
I'm really excited to have finally finished this request, I'm a big sucker for sex pollen/aphrodisiac stuff so this was really fun for me! Also, this was my first time writing for Luffy, so I hope I did him justice!
Need
Pairing: Luffy x Reader
NSFW
Summary: You find your Captain in dire need of a little help. What kind of friend would you be if you didn't provide? Warnings: Smut, Sex Pollen/Aphrodisiac, Oral Sex (Reader receiving), Vaginal Sex Word Count: 1.8k
You should have known something was wrong when the ship was quiet. The Thousand Sunny is never quiet. There’s always the sound of clashing metal, of excited voices, of a song dancing its way across the deck. But you don’t hear a single noise outside of your door, nor do you see anyone as you pad your way outside. 
You knew that you were docking soon, that your crew would leave to explore the island, but you didn’t expect them to leave without waking you up. You had been on night watch last night, so you certainly needed the rest, but you’re not used to them not at least momentarily waking you to let you know where everyone’s going.
Your surprise and confusion only grows as you hear someone crashing through the brush, and you see your Captain emerge, sprinting precariously toward the ship as though he’s being chased.
“Luffy?”
He doesn’t answer as he continues to rush forward, launching himself up onto the Sunny. Luffy stumbles onto the deck, teetering dangerously towards the railing. Before you can rush to catch him, his back hits the wood, and he lowers himself to the ground, legs splayed out. You can’t even tell if he can see you until he murmurs your name. He’s dripping with sweat, his face red.
You kneel down between his legs, leaning forward to try to get a good look at him. You can’t see any visible injuries, but clearly something is horribly wrong. “Are you okay, Luff?”
“No.” His voice is nothing but a whine, his eyes glassy and unfocused. “Need…something.”
“Something?”
Luffy glances around, pout on his face. “Something. Dunno what.”
You reach out to rest your hand on his forehead, which is burning so hot you almost pull it back in shock. He leans into your touch, giving off a soft hum. “You have a fever. Do you know what happened to you?”
“Nothing happened. We were all exploring, and we split into groups, and then…hm…I ate that fruit Zoro picked.”
Oh god. Zoro’s not exactly a botanist, or a survivalist, and for a single moment you believe with every fiber of your being that your dear friend has accidentally poisoned your captain. “What kind of fruit was it?”
“I dunno. It was sweet. And red.”
You sigh. “That doesn’t narrow it down at all. God, you would think that eating one mystery fruit in your life would be enough for you.”
His indignation beats out his discomfort for just a moment. “The first one went really well.”
You guess you can’t argue with that. “Can you remember anything else about it? We can rule out any devil fruit since you haven’t…exploded.”
“It was warm. And it made me wanna come find you.”
That makes you pause. “It…made you want to find me? Like specifically me?”
“Yeah.”
You have a bad feeling about this. “Do you know why you wanted me?”
He squints in concentration. “To…make it better.”
“How?”
He grabs your hand and places it back on his face. The sound he makes is borderline erotic. “Like this. This helps.”
The warmth against your hand, the moan that escapes your captain, the tent you can see growing in his pants, it all starts painting a very troubling picture. A very tempting one, but troubling nonetheless. “Luffy, are you warm anywhere in particular?”
“My stomach. And lower.” He pulls you closer, wrapping an arm around you and burying his face in your neck. His nose nuzzles against you, and he takes a deep breath, inhaling your scent and sighing. His hands gently massage against your hips, reveling in the feeling of your skin beneath his fingertips. “You’re soft,” he murmurs, lips brushing lightly against you. You clench your thighs involuntarily, a move you hope he doesn’t notice.
“You’re—ahh!” One of his hands moves up to your breast, squeezing your breast through your shirt, and he moans again at your squeak. “You’re not in your right mind, Luffy! I think that fruit was—ah!” His hand slides beneath your shirt, then your bra, and finally he pinches your nipple. 
“Come closer.” His voice is thick as he pulls you onto his lap. “I think this is fixing it. Feels nice.” He jerks his hips, and you can feel his hardness rub against you. You try to keep your moan inside of your mouth, but when you do, he huffs, and ruts into you harder.
“Luffy!”
He grins. “That’s better.” As his hand begins to slide down the front of your pants you finally come to your senses and grab it, stopping him in his tracks. He blinks at you, a little clarity coming back to his eyes. “What’s wrong?”
“You–you’re clearly under the influence of something, and I don’t want to make you do anything you don’t want–”
“I want it.” The hand slides slowly down further. His voice grows hungrier, more desperate. “I need it.”
With the way he’s looking at you, pupils blown out and cheeks flushed, you believe him.
“Well if you really need it, I’d hate to deprive you, Captain.”
He grins, and before you know it, you’re pinned to the deck, your shirt and bra removed, Luffy’s teeth pressing insistently against your chest. He shoves his hand unceremoniously between your legs, making a small noise of satisfaction against you when you squeal. His fingers slide against your clothed clit, sending a shiver up your spine and slowly building the heat in your gut. He hums quietly, “It’s wet.” He looks up at you. “For me?”
You flush, before nodding quickly. You can’t bring yourself to look at him out of fear you’ll combust. You can see the sweat sliding down the muscles in his arms and chest, his tongue peeking out of his mouth as he pants. He looks even better than you’d ever dreamed, his eyes radiating a hunger than you never expected to be directed at you.
He quickly slides down your pants and underwear in a single motion, and in your surprise you press your thighs together, shielding yourself from him. He practically growls, “Stop that. Wanna taste.”
He pries your thighs apart, diving into you with the same enthusiasm he does everything else. His tongue laps at you with reckless abandon as he sloppily takes everything you’ll give him. His hands pull you impossibly closer, his nose brushing against your clit as his mouth explores. When you moan, he laughs against you, the rumble of it spreading across your sensitive skin and making your thighs tense around his head. You worry you’ll suffocate him, drown him, but he doesn’t seem to mind losing to you.
You can feel the tension building in your body, your legs shaking as you come closer and closer to your peak. Your hands grip the grass beneath you, one second away from ripping it out of the deck entirely. Some part of you is hyper aware of the fact you are out in the open, where anybody could see or hear, but the rest of you is lost in the pleasure of the moment, in the feeling of your Captain’s tongue against you. So you don’t try to stop your back from arching as your climax grows nearer, nor do you make any attempt to hold back your cry as you cum on your Captain’s face.
He pulls away from you, his face dripping, his pupils blown out, and his lips upturned into a dazed smile. You can’t bring yourself to look away as he slowly licks his lips, savoring every drop of you. Without a word, his mouth crashes into yours, and you can taste yourself on his lips. His hands roughly force down his pants, exposing his weeping cock to the cold air. He lets out a borderline whimper of relief against your lips, before pulling back just long enough to whisper, “Get ready.”
“Lu–ah!” He thrusts into you in one smooth stroke as his lips once again insistently press against yours, stealing your breath away. You can feel every inch of him as your body welcomes him in, clenching around his length. He moans into your mouth, the sound deep and wanton. He gives both of you little time to adjust before his hips are rocking, chasing the release he’s been so desperate for. He’s moving so quickly you’re surprised he was patient enough to even wait this long. His hands are borderline bruising on your hips, his teeth clacking against yours as your kiss grows rougher and rougher, as your dear friend and Captain pounds into you with the fervor of an animal in heat. 
You can feel his muscles tense under your fingers as you pull him tighter. His breaths grow more ragged with every moment, and as he finally pulls away from your kiss you get to see the beautiful sight of the dam breaking as Luffy finally cums. His face is filled with a mix of relief, exhaustion, and affection as he gives a final few thrusts, your own climax coming not soon after. He collapses on top of you, and the weight is more comforting than crushing, though it steals your breath away anyway.
“I was right.” His voice is sleepy and slow, and you can’t help but picture the faces of your friends as they find you stripped bare and pinned to the deck below your Captain. Sanji might have a breakdown.
“Right about what?”
“I needed you. You fixed it.” His hand comes to rest on the back of your head affectionately, and he places a comically loud smooch on your forehead.
“So you’re all cured?”
“Ye–” He hums, and you can see an idea take him as his face scrunches up and his eyes shift away. “No. I think we’ll need to do this again.”
You can’t keep the smile out of your voice as you respond. “Oh yeah? How many more times, do you think?”
“I dunno. A lot. It could take a while.”
You laugh. “You know, I think we can do this as many times as it takes.”
He lets out an overjoyed laugh. “Awesome!”
“But first we should get inside before anyone else gets back. I don’t really want them to see me like this.”
He nods, quickly scooping you up and carrying you in the direction of his cabin. Before you can say anything else, you hear the voices of your crew coming closer, and you quietly urge him to rush.
You only get a moment of relief before you hear Zoro’s confused voice.
“Whose clothes are these?”
Your panic is quickly overshadowed by Luffy’s booming laugh rumbling through his chest, spreading the same infectious joy that he always does. The embarrassment is worth it, just to hear such a wonderful sound.
Tag List:  @pandora-writes-one-piece @shy-writer-999 @saturogojosgirl @dreamcastgirl99 @tochillwithamockingjay
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saiyanprincessswanie · 3 months ago
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What do you Desire
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Pairing: Ari Levinson x Female Reader
Word Count: 2465
Summary: Ari explores one of his desires with you.
Warnings: Anal sex, anal play, size kink, Ari is 6’4, oral (F & M), multiple orgasms, friends with benefits with feelings. Dialogue in bold, “You're taking me so well, baby.”
A/N: Thank you to my beta readers @lfnr-blog-blog-blog & @pigwidgeonxo. All mistakes are mine. Thank you to @fictional-affairs for the header and @firefly-graphics for the divider.
A/N 2: This is for @steviebbboi writing challenge. This can be read with the mini-series I started called Infinity Sex or as a standalone. These are the previous fics Give Me One More & Mine to Ruin.
Reblogs & Comments are welcomed and encouraged. It lets me know you like my work. 😊💜
I do NOT consent to translating or reposting my work on any social media platform, app, or third-party site. If you see my work anywhere besides my personal Tumblr & AO3 accounts, it has been stolen. I will NEVER give written or verbal permission to repost or translate any of my fanfics as they’re MY intellectual property. 🚫🚫
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Tonight was all about Ari and his desires as you knocked on his apartment door. Normally he was all about what you wanted and the new things to try in the bedroom. When Ari expressed he wanted to try anal with you, you wanted to throw yourself in his arms and his bed. This was also something on your list to try but you had always been nervous about it until Ari showed up in your life. You trusted him completely, cared for him deeply and a part of you was falling in love with this gentle man. You both started as strictly friends with benefits, but as time passed, you couldn’t ignore your feelings anymore. You didn’t want to ruin the good thing you had with him so you locked those feelings away.
After a moment of waiting Ari’s front door swung open and there he stood before you in sweatpants and a form-fitting t-shirt. You had to control yourself as the t-shirt he was wearing showed off all his muscles. It was like he was sculpted from the gods above. 
“Hey sweetheart, so happy you're here. Do you want any wine?” Ari hugs you tight before letting you go.
“Yes please,” you stated as you walked into the apartment in your leggings and one of Ari’s shirts that was oversized. The door closed behind you as you kicked off your shoes, placing them at the entrance. 
You followed Ari into the kitchen where he poured you both a glass of wine. Ari handed you the glass and you took a sip of it. You could see his blue eyes wandering across your body like he was drinking you in. You could be wearing a potato sack and you knew he would still eye fuck you. The thought of it brings a smile to your face. 
“So I wanted to make sure you were still up for tonight's scenario. I mean I know this is something I have always wanted to do with you sweetheart but if you aren’t comfortable now or at the time of it I need you to let me know. We can always do something else. I just want you safe and comfortable.” Ari commented as he took a drink of wine. 
You couldn’t help the smile on your face after what he said. He was always looking out for your well-being. He never forced you to do anything you didn’t openly want to try. Ari and you had a safe word just in case anything was too intense for you. But never once had you used it the entire time you had been together. 
“I am ready for tonight. It’s something I have always wanted to try with you. You always take care of me in bed and I trust you will do the same tonight. I know this is something on your list as well so let us do as we always do. Take our time and enjoy one another.” You suggested taking another drink of your wine. 
Ari smirked at you as he moved closer to where you stood in the kitchen. Ari was a very tall man compared to you standing at 6’4. He leaned down and kissed your forehead. 
“Why don’t we take this to my room? I want to be able to have some fun before we try anything new. What do you say, sweetheart?”
“I say let’s go Mr. Levinson and don’t forget to bring the wine.” You winked at him as you turned on your heel and walked away swaying your hips. 
Ari downed his glass of wine as he watched you head to the bedroom. “God she is going to be the death of me.” Ari picked up the bottle of wine and followed you quickly. 
In the bedroom, you turn on the lights next to the sides of the bed. Your body slides across the covers as you lay in the middle of the bed waiting for Ari to pounce. It doesn’t take long before he enters the room placing his glass and the bottle of wine on an end table. Ari walks to the end of the bed and slowly takes his shirt off revealing his muscular body that had a fair amount of chest hair. He slowly crawls up the bed until his body is changing you in.
“You’re too overdressed, sweetheart. Let me help you out of your clothes.” He states. 
Ari leans you upward as he grabs the shirt and pulls it over your head. His fingers then unclasp your bra and take it off slowly. His hand pushes you back on the bed as he works his way lower, kissing your body as he descends past your breasts and to your stomach. Ari’s fingers grab the waistband of your leggings and underwear, pulling them down your legs and discarding them. There you lay bare in front of him. Ari licks his lips as he takes your naked body in front of him. You were the most beautiful woman he had ever laid eyes on. He wanted more than just your body, he wanted you to be his. The problem was he didn’t want to scare you away from him if he told you how he felt. 
Pushing your legs apart Ari settles his broad shoulders in between your legs. He places your legs over his shoulders and starts kissing slowly up your thighs. His beard left scratches in his wake as he made his way towards your pussy. You let out a shuddering breath when he licks through your pussy and kisses your clit. His tongue makes another pass through your petals and a moan escapes your lips.
Your fingers find refuge in his hair as you slide your fingers through his hair. Ari starts to eat you out like a man starved as his tongue and lips work you over. His right thumb finds your clit and rubs circles around it making you moan his name to the heavens. You can feel your body starting to get closer and closer to your end. Your breathing grows quicker the more Ari eats you out. A few more swirls of his tongue and swipes of his thumb to your clit has you screaming your release. Your arousal leaks all over Ari’s beard as he works you through your climax. 
As you come down from your high Ari pulls away and kisses his way back up your body to your breasts. He takes a nipple in his mouth and slightly sucks on it. Again he pulls off with a pop and does the same thing to your other nipple. Your fingers dig into his shoulders as you start to pant. Once he pulls apart from you he kisses you passionately on your lips. His tongue plays with yours as he grinds his clothed cock against your core. When he pulls away from you so the both of you can breathe you press against his chest with your hand signaling for him to lay on his back. 
It’s your turn to pull off his sweats and boxer briefs down his legs, discarding his clothes onto the floor. His cock is hard, long and thick. Just knowing this will be in your ass in a matter of minutes makes your pussy clench around nothing. You whine at the thought of him taking you from behind and ruining your hole for all other men. Ari smirks at you as if he could read your mind. It was as if you could communicate with no words. 
You crawl up his body and lightly grab a hold of his cock. Your head dips down letting your tongue swirl around the tip of his cock. You lick the precum that is dripping down the head of his cock and slowly take him down your throat.
Ari softly whispers “fuck” as soon as he feels you take him deep in your throat. He runs his fingers through your hair as you work yourself up and down his shaft. His hands grip your hair as he starts to fuck your throat. You hum in delight at being used for his pleasure. You hollow your cheeks as you both work together chasing his high. His cock hits you deeper in your throat making tears fall from your eyes. It feels as though you can’t breathe at times but you don’t care you keep bobbing your head up and down on his cock. Cupping his balls you start to play with them causing Ari to groan loudly as he starts to chase his high. 
“That’s it, sweetheart, don’t stop.” He pleads. 
A couple more thrusts and Ari is cumming down your throat as he moans your name over and over. He lets go of your hair as you swallow his cum down your throat. You lick your lips making sure you got every drop of cum in your mouth and take a deep breath in. Ari looks like you swallowed his soul down as he is breathing deeply in and out.
“God damn, sweetheart, that was fucking great. Just give me a minute before I have my way with you.” 
Ari pulls you to his chest and kisses your forehead. You cuddle up against him as you both continue to touch one another sensually. Every caress, every kiss makes this feel more intimate between the two of you. Time passes and you start to get aroused again. Looking down at Ari’s cock he starts to grow hard. Sitting up in bed Ari opens the end table drawer and pulls out some lube. 
“Now sweetheart, I’m going to get you stretched out before we go any further. Okay?”
You nod your head as you get into position, head down and ass up. Ari shuffles behind you and lightly rubs your hip. He pours some lube on your hole and his fingers. The lube makes you tense at first but then you relax. His thumb rubs soft circles around the rim of your hole and with every light pass he just pushes the tip of his thumb into you slowly. Inch by inch his thumb stretches you. Causing you to groan out in pleasure. In and out, he moves gently to not hurt you.
“I’m gonna add two fingers to help stretch you out better. You’re gonna need to take at least three for me to fit.” He pushes two fingers inside you as you moan his name.
“Ari, baby, this feels good. The stretch is…oh god… it's so fucking good.” 
Your ass presses back against his fingers as he finally puts all three inside you. Ari works them in and out of you. Now and then he speeds up making you squeal in delight. After several minutes of working on you and stretching you, adding another finger, and doing it again, he pulls his three fingers out. Ari pours a little more lube on you and strokes some on his cock. 
“Okay sweetheart, I’m going to push inside you. If anything hurts you know your safe word. Are you ready?”
“Yes, I’m ready.”
He grabs his cock and puts the tip to your puckered hole. Slowly he pushes into you and your hole stretches around his thickness. Inch by inch he gently moves inside you and when he is fully inside his cock pulls out just as gently. Your soft whimpers and moans fill the air as Ari starts to speed up a little. Every push and pull has you holding onto the bedding. Ari loves the tightness around his cock and the noises you are making. With as tight as you feel he is afraid he isn’t going to last as long. 
“Darling you are gripping me tightly. Feels so good. You feel so good. Can I go a little harder?” He all but begs you.
“Yes, baby. I need more of you.” You whined as he started to thrust a little harder into you. You relax as much as possible so he can thrust into you more easily.
Every push and pull of his cock has you both moaning and groaning. Ari’s pace is just what you need. Your fingers glide down between your legs to where your clit is. Reaching it you start to play with yourself rubbing it in pace with Ari.
With every thrust you push back against him, trying to chase your end. Ari’s grip on your hips is almost bruising as he gets lost in the sensation of it all. 
“You're taking me so well, baby. I’m close, sweetheart. So fucking close. I need you to cum for me.”
Your fingers continue rubbing your clit and you can feel that familiar coil within you about to break. A few thrusts and a slap to your ass from Ari sends you over the edge as you chant his name over and over. 
That’s all that he needed to hear to make him cum inside you. His thrusts slow down until he is finished. Ari gently pulls himself out of your hole and watches you sink into the bed. Fuck did he enjoy himself for his first time doing anal. 
“Sweetheart, are you okay?”
You mumble out, “Yes, I think I need a minute.” 
Ari straddles your hips and starts to massage your back. He knew you needed this and worked to get all the stress worked out of your back. After ten minutes of massaging he leans down to kiss your shoulder.
“Let’s get up so we can both shower. Then we can lay down.” He kisses you again as you groan out your frustration of having to get up. But you knew you had to.
You both crawl out of bed and take a hot shower together. Each of you cleaning the other while enjoying the intimacy of it all. By the time you were cleaned, you both dried yourselves off and were heading to bed. Ari was putting the lube away as you climbed into bed.
Ari joins you and cuddles up behind your naked form. His big arm drapes across you and pulls you close to his chest. 
You both start to drift off into your sleepy state when you whisper, “Love you, Ari.”
His eyes open up at the sound of your voice and he smiles to himself. “Love you too sweetheart.” But it seems he’s too late as he hears your soft snores as you sleep. 
Were you both just confessing the love you had for one another or was it just a slip of words? He worries that maybe his feelings are getting too involved in what was an agreement between the two of you. This is something you both will need to talk about soon. For now, Ari holds you close and falls asleep.
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biggestsimp12 · 4 months ago
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Mukami brothers x motherly! Reader
{Ugh, I barely see any diabolik lovers fanfics anymore, where has this fandom gone 😭
Anyway, if I can't find any, I'll just write some for (myself) my fellow diabolik lover fans 🫠
(Literally had this in my drafts since Christmas 2023 😀)
Requests are always open!}
--––——
(this takes place after Karlheinz helped the Mukami brothers)
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——––--
You occurred to be "trespassing" Karlheinzes property, where the Mukami brother were said to be living. If truth to be told, you didn't step a foot close to his premises, you just happened to be hard by at an unfitting time and place.
As the cool evening breeze caressed your skin, You stood before the vampire king, Karlheinz. He had summoned you there to answer for your transgressions, whatever they might be. His eyes, cold as ice, bore into you very soul as he surveyed you with disdain. According to his words, "you had committed some unforgivable offense against him, and you were about to pay the price."
Karlheinzes words echoed through your ears as he announced his judgment: "As punishment for your actions, I could have killed you where you stand. Instead, I have decided to give you a chance at redemption. I will make you my fourth wife." His voice was cold and harsh, like the wind howling through the mountains.
You cringed at the thought of being his wife, let alone his fourth wife. Before you could even begin to refuse, however, his eyes scanned over you, and something in them changed. "No," he muttered to himself, "you look far too flawed." It was then that he noticed the crease between your brows, the sign of your displeasure.
Instead, he decided, since no one was currently tending to the Mukami brothers, who were still quite young, he would make you their maid. It was a lesser role, but one that would still allow you to live another day instead of being murdered. "You will be the mother to the Mukami brothers," he announced, "until such time as they are capable of taking care of themselves. You're in no position to argue. Any complains and you'll be sucked dry. Did I make myself clear?"
You didn't particularly like the sound of this new arrangement, but you figured it was better than the alternative. So, you nodded numbly and turned to leave. As you walked away from the intimidating figure of Karlheinz, you couldn't help but wonder what sort of life you had just signed up for. Being the mother to four vampire children sounded like a daunting task, to say the least.
---–—
Ruki
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He's reluctant at first, only interacting with you if necessary. He has mommy issues so it will take a while until he warms up to you. He's afraid you're going to hurt him and his brother, just like the people at the orphanage did :(
Once he got used to you and started tolerating your existence, he slowly looks up to you.
He likes to help you with house chores and loves when you read books to all of them.
Respects the fact that you treat and love all of them equally, and that you actually intervine in their life like a proper parent should do.
He still respects Karlheinz and wishes do fulfil his plan, despite your disagreement. In his eyes, he's still the one who gave them a second chance at life.
Will not speak to for a couple of days if bring up the scars on his back. He hates them and hates who done it to him. Though despite all this, he secretly enjoys the comfort you give him, despite not admitting it ever.
---——
Kou
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---——
Oh boy. He's a cheeky little bastard that's for sure. Like Ruki, he doesn't trust you at all at first. He'll always ask for stuff in return whenever you ask him to do something. That's just the he was taught.
It will be hard to get him out of that mindset. Really now.
When he started to trust you a bit, also started singing for you, just so you reward him with your baked goods.
Of course he gets away with it every time as you are too soft hearted.
You'll encourage him whenever he sings, even suggesting some singing lessons if he wants to.
Maybe you weren't such a boogey person as he first thought you were.
Yuma
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---–—
At first, just like Ruki, he's skeptical of you. He doesn't trust you one bit.
It will take a while to gain his trust.
Thinks you're one of those fancy people who didn't care about lesser class people like him.
You gain his respect (and a bit of trust) when you show that's not true at all.
Likes gardening with you and gets very happy when the stuff you guys planted together turn out delicious.
Isn't a very picky eater, unlike Kou
He's pretty chill once he's gotten used to you, but he still doesn't trust you that much sometimes.
Azusa
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He's the most clingy out of all of them-
When Karlheinz first introduced you to them, he was the first that came to you, only for him to ask you to cause him pain.
You had to hide the whole cutlery in the kitchen from him as he kept cutting himself.
You always bandaged his wounds and gave them gentle kisses.
Wrong idea. (even though it meant good.)
Now he keeps cutting and bruising himself, just for you to keep giving him attention- (Azusa, no-)
You had to lecture him a lot to tell him that he can just come and ask for affection if he wants it and doesn't have to ask Yuma to cut him with the gardening scissors, (which was another thing you had to hide from him.)
It took a while but you somewhat, somehow, managed to make him stop cutting himself whenever he wanted hugs-
——–-
The end <3
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notedchampagne · 6 months ago
Note
What makes a tlt au work for you? Do u have any favourites out there/that you’ve thought of?
its hard because it can go down to the writing! i have a huge bias for things that put focus on the characters acting awful and driving the story forward- if a story has a plot thats great, but its the difference between "gideon and harrow keep meeting up at parties and fall a little bit in love every time" and "gideons angry she lost her childhood to the cult so she attends a party with the tridentarii to shotgun adolescent experiences, and harrowhark, frustrated that gideon is pulling on her metaphorical leash, follows to stalk her". the former retains a 5+1 fic format and is more bite-size, while the latter puts more focus into their growth as characters. im not great at articulating what i like specifically, but ill put my favorite fics below:
what if nona was dogs tugs at my heart: its post-canon, slice-of-life, and has a unique concept (said in the title). i judged a book by its cover because i thought the premise seemed too silly at first but ive been made a fool and its pet clown. it feels so true to nona the way its about all the things nona loves and how she gets to explore the world through new eyes. i love the way it explores characters softening up and getting hurt through a third person pov
we have always lived in the apartment by @thatneoncrisis i keep saying this but for the love of GOD guys this au is so good it makes me cry and feel such a deep catharsis from it. it takes gideon and harrow and the ninth as a cult and explores their struggle to adapt to a modern society when noone ever gets a break (WOW ITS JUST LIKE IN REAL L-). quinn writes the sides of griddlehark i think go overlooked in fanfic often: their codependency, their tendency to lash out when theyre defensive, their mutual paranoia and different coping mechanisms, harrows psychosis and gideons bitterness, their relationships to each other as being the only other person who really understands what the other suffered through. god. i feel lightheaded.
"but SAM, i dont like angst but i want to see this writing!" read gap between a tragedy and a comedy
"SAM, i also like when gideon and harrow are horrible because theyre maladjusted teenagers! but i want more antics where the characters drive things forward over angst!" read whats eating gideon nav
you just aint receiving is one of my FAVORITE modern aus of all time (and i heavily recommend the authors other fics as well!) if you really want to see how much i love this fic the fact that my comments take up the entire phone screen probably says a lot. its hard to put it concisely: it keeps harrows air of misanthropy and cruelty but redefines it as the result of her upbringing and personal struggle to live in a university while dealing with a backpack of mental illness and frustration. it changes gideons personality as the daughter of john gaius in a way that makes sense having her grow up with johns middling parenting skills and getting everything she ever wanted (connecting it back to kirionas personality in ntn!). it brings in side characters (specially palamedes. my beautiful boy palamedes) in ways that compliment harrow and gideon but not so obviously that they only exist to be supports. they have their own lives and ideals. its a modern au that brings in the boiling politics of johns cult uprising once again in a really novel way
semi charmed kinda life by @griddlebait. jesuchristo and all his middle names this fic is GREAT for you if you want a slice of life, coming of age type modern au that explores what its like for gideon and harrow if they actually got the space to see who theyd become outside of the stifling fate tlt has for them. as far as modern aus go im usually very hesitant to read them because im afraid modernizing the characters takes features away from their core but i really love and respect the way the author treats the 69ers with care and draws distinct lines that shows me how their grow and change while keeping a line to the anchor. also they write HIDEOUS (complimentary) PINING. DISGUSTING. some of these chapters were so chock full of dyke drama that they made me nauseous and whimsical. i think once a friend said this fic felt like if gh could be reincarnated and i like that descriptor a lot
til the cows come home is another postcanon fic that made me feel sick and crybabyish about it- i would definitely recommend it if you want to explore a happier ending with griddlehark! with this and what if nona was dogs the thing i like most about them is that they mix up vulnerability with pain and fear, so it feels more lifelike that way if that makes sense. i lost my taste in fluff fics over time but when its interspersed with struggle and characters causing problems because they cant cope with themselves it feels much more earnest and raw
this became very long. im not sorry
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uceyliyahh · 4 months ago
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Summary; After her difficult breakup, Tiana wanted to start anew with her life. That's when she realized her life would be better when she met him.
This fanfic is 18+! NO MINORS ALLOWED
word count: 3783
Smut warning; it’ll come in the story randomly so PLEASE PLEASE look out for it I’m not really good at writing ✍🏽 smuts but I’m improving at the moment.
Jey Uso X Tiana
AWFUL GRAMMAR IM GETTING BETTER I SWEAR LOL.
comments, likes, repost are appreciated I would love the constructive feedback in what area I need to approve in. 🤍
ALSO! I don’t not want nobody stealing my fanfics or take it as theirs that will be an issue fasho so keep it cute respectfully.
I only own my OC along with the make up scenarios
But I’ll be writing along the way since this story is in my drafts on Wattpad right now so yuh 💁🏽‍♀️
TAGS⬇️ lmk if you wanna be tagged 🏷️
@paigereeder @pinkwithhearts @jstarr86
1.
Have you ever thought about running away? And starting somewhere new? Having a fresh start with things, especially having a promising career?
Tiana was doing that, starting somewhere fresh, living with her best friend Bianca in Cali after her messy breakup with Malakai when she saw him cheat on her with someone she knew.
But she wasn't worried about that man. She stood her ground while focusing on her career as a Nail Tech, getting her money's worth so she could have a place of her own.
She did the dumbest thing ever: She got this man tatted on the side of her right ear. Bianca convinced her to cover it with something pretty.
But she didn't know any tattoos around here; only Bianca did. She contacted a tattoo shop near them and scheduled an appointment.
OMNISCIENT
Tiana was finishing up with her last client of the day before shutting down the shop. She had a tattoo appointment afterward, so she wanted to get this done before she was late.
She focused on her clients' nails as she applied the last few bits of gems to their nails while turning on the curing light and placing their hands under the light.
Her phone beeped as she saw Bianca texting her, probably about her appointment at the tattoo shop.
Breezy💁🏽‍♀️: Tianaaaaa wyd girrrl?
Tiana: I'm finishing up my last client before heading to my appointment today.
Tiana: are you sure they're like legit? Bc if I get a fucked up cover-up, I'm going to kill you. 😀
Breezy: yesssss lele they're legit like this man owns the business chile. 😐
Tiana: oh fr?
Breezy: yes T
Tiana: do they have an Instagram page showing their artwork?
Breezy: yeah, I'll send it to you on Instagram.
Tiana: okay, girly, I'll text you later.
Breezy: bye, girl.
She turned off the curing light as her client looked at her nails with a smile on her face; she was satisfied with her results. Her client knew that Tiana was the shit when It came to doing nails.
Tiana instructed her to take a pose with her hands to show off her nails so she could post it on her IG story. She started doing nails when she was sixteen years old. Her mom and stepdad helped her with everything, and she was very grateful for that because look at her now.
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biancabelairwwe replied to your story: ouuuuu girl them are honestly cute asf.
sheloveemma replied to your story: BOOK ME NEXT NOW!
ughitsstacy replied to your story: girl, I LOVE THEM! PERIOD!
shelovekai replied to your story: damn, mama, you snapped.
She looked at Malakai's reply to her story as she just rolled her eyes; she could've sworn she had blocked that man she didn't want nun' to do with his toxic ass; her client paid her with an extra tip due to how much she loved the nails as she told her goodbye.
Tiana smiled at the woman as she went to lock the door, getting ready to sanitize everything before her appointment. She was wiping down her equipment and the table with a warm rag, making sure that everything was cleaned and that she wasn't missing any spots.
She checked the time on her Apple Watch, seeing that she had to leave for her appointment to get this nigga name covered up due to the simple fact that she got tired of seeing it every single time she took pictures.
Tiana did one last check around the place, making sure that everything was back to where it was, before grabbing her purse and turning off the lights as she headed back towards her 2017 BMW.
She entered her car by shutting the door behind her, grabbing her keys as she put them in the ignition, and pressing the button to start it up.
She applied lip gloss on her lips and began pulling out the driveway towards the tattoo shop.
✧.*
Tiana pulled up towards the tattoo shop, turning off her car while grabbing her purse. As she entered the place, she looked around the area. She saw the shop's very cultured aesthetic, and the smell of the place seemed so refreshing to her.
She noticed that two other people were sitting at the reception table on their phones. Since it wasn't that busy today, she walked up to them, and they both looked at her.
"Hello, ma'am. I'm Kiara. What can I help you with?" Kiara asked.
"Hi, I'm here for an appointment at 3:50," Tiana said as she pulled out her phone to show them her appointment.
"Ah, you're Miss Tiana?"
She nodded her head yes as she patiently waited while clinging onto her purse.
"And you're here for a cover-up?" She asked.
"Yes, I am." She saw the woman nod her head as she looked up at her.
"Okay, you're set, ma'am. Please have a seat. He will be right with you."
"Thank you," Tiana said as she sat down in the chair.
She was scrolling through her IG, seeing people had liked her story that she had posted an hour ago. Replying to people who responded to her story, she saw a text pop up, so she scrolled down to see who it was. It was Malakai from an unknown number since Tiana blocked him.
Weirdo: mamas, can you unblock me, please? I promise I've changed.
Tiana: Kai you finna get blocked again leave me aloneeee
Weirdo: you know that you're mines forever.
Tiana: tuh in your dreams nigga bye.
Tiana rolled her eyes while proceeding to block his new number. She was thinking, 'nigga probably using WhatsApp or TextNow to get new numbers.' While she was doing that, her eye caught something as she saw a man getting his equipment out.
She tried to make out his features but couldn't due to the door being closed. She would have to wait until she got in that chair, but she went back to scrolling through her Instagram.
Breezy: bestieee are you at your appointment?
Tiana: yeah, I'm here.
Breezy: good cuz Ik your ass would've forgot I'm so glad you're getting that shit covered.
Tiana: yeah, me too tired of seeing that shit.
Breezy: do you like the shop?
Tiana: yeah, I love the aesthetic of it, and it smells good.
Breezy: seee I told you I got'chu girl.
As she was texting away, she pulled her head up and saw the same man standing at the door, waiting patiently for her until Kiara said something to her.
"Excuse me, miss, but you can come in now," Kiara said.
Tiana nodded her head yes, grabbed her purse, and walked past the specimen while sitting on the chair. She placed her bag on the table next to her.
She looked up at the fine specimen, finally making out his features, and boy, was he fine as hell. He was wearing some sweats with a black graphic shirt, and his shoe game was on point. Of course, he had a mullet and ear piercings on both sides of his ears.
His toned muscular body, along with his Tanned skin and salt/pepper beard, it wouldn't be rude to her if she kept eye fucking him while he was getting ready.
"You getting a cover-up?" Josh spoke, breaking the silence.
'Damn, his voice was deep as hell.'
"U-um, yeah, I am around my ear, " she said, noticing that she was stumbling on her words.
It caused him to chuckled a little bit while looking at her face, "You ain't gotta be nervous around me, Princess Ion' bite." She was taken aback for a second. 'Princess?' Well, she hadn't heard that nickname before. Is he always like this with his clients?
Tiana shook off the feeling as he pulled out some designs to show her, to see which one she liked better. She looked at his designs and was amazed at his artwork; it was perfect.
But one design caught her eye. It just looked so beautiful: two butterflies with a cross between them.
"I like this one; it caught my eye," Tiana said as she smiled.
He nodded his head as he took the design that she wanted behind her cover-up.
He pulled the chair towards her and reclined it back a bit so that she could be comfortable. He put on some black gloves while grabbing the tattoo pen.
"Can you turn your head for me, mama? " he asked. She nodded yes and turned her head to the side.
He started working on the cover-up behind her ear. He noticed that a male's name was tatted behind her ear. He had a smug expression on his face.
"So you got a name tattooed on you?"
Not trying to be in her business, but was trying to be in her business.
"Yeah, I got this lame ass nigga tatted on me that I was with for a while until he did some messed up shit, so my bestie decided to hook me up." She said while being still.
"Hm, how long was yall together?" He asked while focusing on the tattoo.
"We were together for like two, almost three years, maybe?"
He smacked his teeth and shook his head in disappointment. " That's a horrible mistake to get someone's name tatted on you. I heard it was bad luck." She wanted to smack him upside the head but couldn't.
"Don't put that on me, sir. I want no back luck," Tiana said as Josh snickered at her.
"It's not funny, you bozo." He rolled his eyes at her while continuing to do his work behind her ear.
They were back into complete silence again, and she kept hearing the needle buzzing in her ear like some type of fly buzzing around her.
She kept thinking about her relationship with Malakai. It became so toxic for her that she couldn't even deal with his ass anymore after she found out he cheated on her.
Tiana felt like she wasn't going to find love again because she was afraid of the outcome, so she kept her guard up around men, especially the ones who tried to holla at her.
"Who's your best friend?" Josh asked her.
"Her name is Bianca. She told me she comes here often, " she replied while continuing to talk on her phone.
"Ohhhh yeah I know her, I did some designs on her not too long ago."
Tiana nodded her head, listening to him talk. His voice seemed to soothe her because it was so deep and raspy, almost making her sleepy, as she yawned a bit while rubbing her eyes.
He took notice of that, "Long day, I'm assuming?"
"Yeah, I'm just hella tired. I'm not going to lie to you." She said.
He just hummed in agreement as he was finishing up her tattoo while turning off his tattoo pen; Jey had sprayed some alcohol on wet paper towel as he wiped behind her ear, causing her to hiss in pain.
Jey snickered at her reaction as she glared at him, throwing his hands up in defense.
"Aye, you wanted this, not me." He said.
"Yeah, yeah, whatever. How much do I owe you?" Tiana responded as she pulled her wallet out of her purse.
"It's on me, ma; don't worry about it." She looked up at him with a confused expression, which had her thinking to herself, 'What does he mean about that?' Tiana put her wallet back inside her purse as Jey gave her a mirror to check out her new tattoo.
She turned her head a bit to see it, moving her ear to the side to see its design.
"Omg, this is really bomb as fuck." Tiana said.
"Thank you. I mean, they say I'm the best, better than my cousin, no shade or nun." She snickered at his comment as he reclined her chair upwards while she stood up to fix herself.
"Lemme get a quick pic so I can post it on my story." He said.
Tiana knew she was good with poses, so she turned her head to the side, showing off her cover-up tattoo. Jey took a quick picture of it before putting his phone down.
"Thank you; I appreciate it. I never got your name; my fault," Tiana said while monitoring his face.
"My name is Joshua, but people close to me call me Jey or Josh for short—whatever floats your boat, mama." Jey replied.
"I'm Tiana, by the way."
Jey thought to himself for a second while looking at her features deeply. she was a pretty girl that's fahso, and her personality seemed bubbly almost?'Whoever fumbled her cute ass is so unlucky now I'm finna be all up in that.'
"Tiana, huh? That's a cute name for a pretty girl like you; lemme me get your number, lil' mama," He said bluntly as she rolled her eyes at him while he gave her his phone.
He watched her type her phone number in while she gave him back his phone. They stood there in silence as they looked at each other until her gaze shifted towards her buzzing phone.
He watched her walk out his suite as he kept stealing glances at her ass; he knew that thang was thang in that one piece that she had on.
It was almost like he was fascinated with her in some way when they literally just met each other today; maybe it was her features that got him feeling like this with her.
But he had shaken them thoughts outta his head cleaning his equipment up.
✧.*
TIANA
I finally made it home. I parked my car in the driveway right next to Bianca's, turned off the ignition, grabbed my purse, and closed the car door behind me.
As I was walking in the house, I heard moaning and groaning upstairs, which made me realize that Montez was taking Bianca to Pound Town, which I personally did not want to hear.
I went upstairs towards my bedroom while shutting the door behind me as I took off my shoes throwing them on my shoe rack sighing in relief I really did hate being on my feet especially sitting on my ass too.
I fumbled onto my nice, comfortable bed and hugged the pillows until I felt my phone buzz. I thought it was Kai texting me again from a different number, so I went to see who was texting me.
'An unknown number ofc.'
Unknown number: did you make it home safe, princess?
Tiana: who dis?
Unknown number: Did you forget already? You were just here a couple of hours ago, girl.
I had to think about it for a minute since I tend to forget sometimes. The caller ID wanted to FaceTime me, of course. I hung up quickly because I didn't know who this person was until that person called again.
I rolled my eyes. While answering the FaceTime call, she saw a familiar face. That's when it clicked to her: It was Joshua from the tattoo shop.
FACETIME
Jey: now, do you remember?
Tiana: yeah, yeah boy now what'chu want?
Jey: I just wanted to make sure you drove home safe. That's all, princess.
Him and these damn puppy names was going to be the death of me; never had I experienced being called princess like I'm some princess from England or sum.
I placed my phone down on top of my dresser while unzipping my one-piece. This shit was killing me today felt like I couldn't breathe. As I was doing that, I proceeded to wobble my ass outta the one piece hearing Josh snickering.
Tiana: The fuck is funny nigga?
Jey: you, you is funny as hell wobbling like that shawty.
Tiana: Man fuck you, it was really tight.
Jey: mhm
I just rolled my eyes at him and gave him the middle finger. Finally, I got out of one piece and threw it in the dirt bin next to my bookshelf. 'Yes, I read, yes, I'm a nerd.' I was in my underwear while digging through my drawer for some comfortable clothing.
I felt his gaze through the phone, but I didn't speak on it, not understanding why I was getting comfortable with being half-naked on FaceTime with this man I barely knew.
Jey: damn, mama, you got a dump trunk back there.
Tiana: are you flirting with me right now sir?
Jey: maybe, maybe not. I'm just calling it what it is, princess.
Tiana: call me that again imma
Jey: or what?
I ignored him while getting fully naked in front of him and grabbing my towel that was nearby so that I could cover my body until I headed to the bathroom.
Tiana: I'm going to go shower, so I'm going to hang up now.
Jey: nooo, take me with'chu
Tiana: why so? Can you look at my ass or what?
Jey: nah I just wanted to stay on the phone with'chu.
Tiana: sigh ight then whatever you want dawg.
I took my phone with me to the bathroom. As I sat down on the counter table, making it look up at the ceiling, I heard him smack his teeth.
Jey: aye, yo ass betta get me up from looking at this ceiling.
Tiana: my fault, dawg. Lemme fix that for ya.
He seemed pretty annoyed when I did that, but I found it amusingly funny seeing him annoyed at my actions. Meanwhile, I unraveled my towel from my body as I headed inside the shower.
Jey: what do you do?
Tiana: I own my nail tech shop, so I do people's nails and get good tips.
Jey: Fr shawty? shi imma have to pull up to get a manicure from you.
Tiana: I can definitely send you the address to the place.
Jey: Bet that up fasho
✧.*
After taking a nice long shower, I was downstairs cooking me something to eat for dinner while still being on Facetime with Joshua. He was playing the game with his brothers, hollering and screaming at each other like some dogs. I noticed that Bianca came downstairs and came towards me to see what I was cooking.
"Ouuu girl what'chu cooking?" She asked.
"I'm cooking me some chicken in the air fryer along with some rice. I made extra for you and Montez, so y'all can eat after that session y'all had." I said while letting the rice sit.
"Omg, I love you so much, bestie, but who's that on the phone?"
"Oh, that's Joshua."
Her face looked perplexed for a minute, then it clicked, so she put a smirk on her face as I gave her a stern expression, thinking, 'I know this girl isn't going to try to hook me up with this man.'
"B, no, I'm not doing this with'chu tonight, chile." I said.
"C'monn, lele Joshua is a really cool ass person, bro, and then he'll be the first Samoan man you dated." She commented.
Jey: I know that's right, what's up Bianca!
Tiana: Shut the hell up sir
Jey: No need to be rude lil' mama
Bianca covered her mouth after he called me that. This girl is so dramatic. I swear. After finishing cooking the food, I sat down at the table while setting up my phone, and I began eating while watching Joshua play the game.
It looked like he was playing Call Of Duty. He seemed pretty good at the game, but his attention was now on me as his eyebrows furrowed a bit.
Jey: What'chu eating, pretty girl?
Tiana: I made some chicken and rice.
Jey: you ain't gon' share it?
'tf he mean was I going to share it?'
Tiana: Um, no, I wasn't planning on it. Also, how the hell am I supposed to share this with' chu, sir?
Jey: never heard of pretending?
'ight he don't gotta be smart about it.'
Tiana: I guess I can share with'chu then you look like you've been starving sir so here boy.
He smiled like a cute puppy as I pretended to give him some of my food while he pretended to eat it. It was kind of cute and funny, and we both chuckled at each other while gazing into each other's eyes. For a second, I could read his facial expression well until Bianca said something.
"Aww, y'all two look cute, girl. Honestly, y'all would be the cutest couple." Bianca said as I rolled my eyes at her.
"Girl, please don't start" I said while continuing to eat.
"Don't be denying it now, lele; you two will end up fucking each other sooner or later and then be a happy couple." I almost choked on my food when she said that, especially while I was on the phone with this man.
I could sense him smirking through the phone as he continued to play the game, and I knew he had just heard what she had said. I'm not going to lie. He was fine as hell, but I don't know where his energy is at right now.
After eating dinner, I made sure I washed my plate and put it in the dishwasher before going upstairs to my bedroom, closing the door behind me and yawning.
Jey: you finna go to sleep?
Tiana: yeah, I'm tired
Jey: What'chu doing tomorrow?
Tiana: I have like four clients tomorrow, then after that, I should be free. Why?
Jey: You wanna go out for lunch or sum
'I don't know where he's getting at with this but I like it.'
Tiana: yeah, sure, that sounds good.
Jey: Ight bet I'll see you tomorrow then.
Tiana: Goodnight Josh.
Jey: Night, mamas.
Under Your Touch.
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biancabelairwwe, shelovesemma, shelovekai and 58,999 people liked your post.
tianasworld: he fixed me up quick i love it so much. 😍
biancabelairwwe: that's so cuteee I didn't even notice it I'm so happy you got it covered.
shelovesemma: 🫢 you got his name covered?
tianasworld: @ shelovesemma yeah girl I did got tired of seeing it.
shelovekai: wtf tiana 😠
tianasworld: @ shelovekai don't wtf to me nigga you might as well do the same thing. 🙎🏽‍♀️
A/N: welcome to a new storyyyy I honestly wanted to try something different and I got some inspiration from a story I read on tumblr so I hope yall enjoy this one.
Lmk in the comments below ⬇️ love yall.
Stay Ucey.
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king-urameshi · 7 months ago
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my favorite bucktommy fanfic
I figured I've read enough fanfic for this ship to curate a list of my favorites since wading through the ao3 tag can be a challenge. Some of these have been recommended numerous times already on here but hey, what's another shout out for some good writing?
I will add more on reblogs as I come across other fanfic I like:
left breathless by elizabethgee [e] [11.4k words, 2/3 chapters]
summary:
Buck turns to Tommy for comfort when an arson case involving a man who looks like Tommy ends up being ruled a murder. And Tommy doesn't have daddy issues. Really, he doesn't. This fic will include very dark themes, including blackmail, murder, and arson.
__
prescribed burn by wakeupnew [t] [8.4k words, one-shot]
summary:
Tommy's busy fighting a wildfire at the edge of the Angeles National Forest, but every time he checks his phone, he has an increasingly unbelievable series of text messages. (Or: Over the course of eighteen hours with Buck and the 118, from a distance and then up close and personal, Tommy keeps having to reassess.)
__
gettin' bi by brewrosemilk [e] [10.3k words, one-shot]
(you have to be logged in to read it)
summary:
God, this feels really good. Everything about it; from the size of Tommy’s hand cradling his face, to the gentle yet firm way he sucks Buck’s bottom lip into his warm mouth - to the rough traction of their faint stubble, a slight sound going with it. Men, Buck decides right then and there. Yeah. Men are good, too.  disclaimer because i have picked up on some confusion: this is not a friends with benefits > lovers story. they are good friends, but they are not in love. this story embraces the concept of casual and platonic sex, especially between bi/gay men because it tends to be something that is heavily stigmatized.
__
company through every twist and turn by kitthekazoo [m] [12.2k words, one-shot]
summary:
Five fights that help Buck and Tommy grow closer.
__
all the vices i can't give up by starryeyedjanai [e] [4.6k words, one-shot]
summary:
It’s kind of second nature at this point—if he’s not sending a picture to Eddie, it’s probably going to Tommy. So his mind must have been running on autopilot when he hit send and now he has to deal with the fact that he accidentally sent Tommy a picture of him with water dripping down his chest, a clear come on. And that Tommy took the bait. or, Tommy doesn’t kiss Buck when he comes over to make things right between them, but Buck still manages to accidentally bag him
--
while you arranged flowers by newtkelly [e] [4.6k words, one-shot]
summary:
Tommy’s eyes catch his and Buck is taken aback by the state of them, blown so black and glassy. He always looks so tongue-in-cheek, like he’s in on some joke and waiting for everyone else to catch on. He doesn’t look like that right now, though. Tommy’s composure is waning—the guy who takes on the world with a million dollar smile and a statuesque cleft chin and flies choppers to Vegas on a whim and into Cat 5 hurricanes to help old friends and kisses clarity into men who thought they were finished figuring themselves out, that guy is just as much a slave to his desire as any mortal man, and Buck is winded by the fact that he’s played any part in that. — Buck’s got a wedding date, but as far as today goes, he’s also got a regular one.
--
looking for an ocean breeze/so i can fill my mind with ease by newtkelly [e] [8.8k words, one-shot]
summary:
“Can I top you off?” Buck’s head whips frantically in Tommy’s direction. “Huh?” “Your champagne,” Tommy says with a sooty half-smirk, while Buck irrationally feels like his bluff’s been made. Tommy taps a finger twice against the plastic in his hand. “It’s empty. Can I get you some more?” — Maddie gets married in an emergency room and Buck learns how to ask.
--
of coming outs and spiderman kisses by alicemcgee [g] [1.9k words, one-shot]
summary:
After coming out to the two most important people in Buck's life, he decides to wait with telling the rest of his friends. he's ready, he just wants to find the right way to do so. Naturally, as this is Buck we're speaking about, things get a little out of his hands. Or should we say mouth?
--
the ally and the beast by jobairdxx [e] [2.4k words, one-shot]
summary:
Tommy knows he's late, and he feels awful about it. He so badly wanted to make it to the wedding, but the fire was an absolute inferno that would not go out. When it was finally extinguished and Tommy was given the okay to head out, he jumped in the rig with the rest of his crew, immediately asking them to drop him at the hospital. And of course they had given him grief for it, but he didn't care as long as they got him where he needed to be. When he walks through the ER bay doors and sees Evan, he's instantly apologetic. “Sorry I'm late, that fire was a beast.” But then Evan hits him with a, “So are you,” and grabs him and kisses him, and he wouldn't be able to stop the moan that leaves his mouth if he tried.
--
i could be the one (or your new addiction) by milominderbinder [t] [4k words, one-shot]
summary:
“You know you’ve got a hard limit on five Tommy mentions per day,” Hen says.  She puts one hand on her hip, and the other points accusingly towards the large jar in the middle of the coffee table; once home to Cap’s homemade trail mix, it’s recently been emptied out, labelled the Tommy Jar, and is already stuffed half-full of Buck’s hard-earned dollars. It’s only been four weeks since he came out to everyone.  The jar was introduced by the end of week one. With a sigh, Buck reaches for his wallet. He pulls out two dollars, walks over, and stuffs them both into the jar.  “That’s one on credit,” he says, “'Cus you have to let me finish the story—" Five times Buck had to put a dollar in the Mentioning Tommy jar during 7x07, and one time nobody was around to catch him.
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an outlier that should not be counted by dadvans [e] [7.4 words, one-shot]
summary:
Buck knows a lot of random trivia. Tommy falls in love with him one fact at a time.
--
flying blind by kat2107 [t] [3.3 words, one-shot]
(have to be logged in to read)
summary:
Evan Buckley loves his boyfriend. He also loves sex. He would love to have sex with his boyfriend. When he gets a bad feeling why Tommy insists on keeping things PG13 way past any necessity, he turns to the only gay firefighter he knows. Consent is easy, right? It's all about the communication. note: There is a hint of bad sexual experiences Tommy had in the past when he was figuring out his sexuality. There is no details but it might be read as lack of consent, though it was more likely a lack of care.
--
little by little by mediawhore [t] [4.7 words, one-shot]
summary:
‘Some wounds never vanish. Yet little by little, I learned to love my life.’ Mary Oliver Or Buck & Tommy, during and after the wedding.
--
you've got the love to see me through by emquin [g] [4.7 words, one-shot]
summary:
Tommy's POV throughout 7x06 where he's mostly just exhausted.
--
down, down, down by sketchytaco [t] [6.2 words, 4/4 chapters]
summary:
He rubs the smudged words on his chest more and more he gets older, wondering where his soulmate is. Wondering if they're thinking of him, if they're close. He wonders what they look like, what they sound like. If they've always been out, or if they're hiding, or even if its someone who hasn't figured themselves out yet.
--
five ways to fall in love with the man in the mirror by evcndiaz [m] [1.9 words, one-shot]
summary:
Buck meets God at a gay club. He finds him in an oil-slick puddle on a damp night, neon lights reflecting off the kaleidoscopic liquid in the parking lot. or; Evan Buckley falls in love with himself.
--
raspberry by evcndiaz [e] [4.4 words, one-shot]
summary:
“do you want to dance with him?” evan raises an eyebrow. “i want to dance with you.” tommy sways forward, nudging his thumb up underneath evan’s jaw so he can tilt his face up and to the side where the man is dancing against some young twenty-something that thinks they have a chance. and hell, maybe they do. but tommy’s not interested in the kid, not tonight at least. he drops his voice, hand snaking down to evan’s ass so he can pull him close. “let me change that: do you want me to see you dancing with him?” evan shivers. bingo. or; sometimes three isn't a crowd. or x2; buck, tommy, and a gay club. things get messy. literally.
--
evan, elated and euphoric by brewrosemilk [e] [16.5 words, one-shot]
(log in to read it)
summary:
For a moment, that’s all that seems to echo inside of Buck’s head, more than ever before; you have a man on top of you, you are kissing a man; you’re touching a man, and he’s touching you, and you like it. Buck likes it - not just being with Tommy, being with a man - that part is obvious, but he… likes that he likes it. He loves that he likes it. Truthfully, he doesn’t think that he has ever felt more at home in his own body than he does in this very moment.
--
a (not so) new hoodie by littlebipolarsunshine [g] [2.8 words, one-shot]
summary:
In which Buck doesn't look very closely when putting on a hoodie before going to work.
--
learning to fly by captainmintyfresh [m] [56k words, ?/8 chapters]
summary:
A fic inspired by the 7x05 promo Tommy gives Buck the love he deserves. AKA Tommy goes from 0 to whipped as fuck real fast.
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a-doubleh-x · 8 months ago
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Buttonblossom Analysis in TADC Episode 2
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(Background rainbows: hint, hint)
Ragatha was so sweet to Pomni in episode 2 🥺💖 Most people caught onto the obvious fact that Raggs is being codependant and leans onto toxic positivity on the way she tries to cheer up Pomni, but I still think for the most part her heart is in the right place.
I liked their dynamic in episode 1, but I liked it so much in 2 I decided to write a little analysis on it (plus the ship fuel 👀) in preparation for the romance fic I'm writing about them.
Without further ado, let's go!
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Looking back at Ragatha, on the good side, she made some very strong, active efforts to help her during her transition into the digital realm. She checked first thing in the morning if she was okay, she tried to make her feel included in the adventure at the beginning and showed care for her safety overall.
My favorite scene, though, is when the circus gang falls into the fudge river and after checking in on them, the first thing she says is: "Poor Pomni!" 😭 Girlie is so empathetic she even manages to care for someone who's not even there, while she's in a terrible situation herself!
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I think this proves how much of a good person Raggs is. She doesn't just help people to feel good or superior, she does it because she geniuenly cares for other people's wellbeing and I find that very noble 😊
On the negative side, she seems to have some very particular communication issues with Pomni, even though she seems to be the circus memeber she cares the most about at the moment.
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For starters, her attitude comes off as a little condescending very often. She hardly asks questions to Pomni and tends to assume for her. She hardly acknowledges some of her struggles and tries to downplay them, like when she degrades their experience as "larping". Also, she makes Pomni feel like a child when she tries to "hype her up" in her own words.
If we take Pomni's nightmare into consideration, it seems she believes Ragatha thinks Pomni is not "cut out for it", which might be a result of her condescending behavior I just mentioned.
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This makes sense to me and also sheds a little bit of light on how Pomni sees herself as: small and insignificant. It's unclear at the moment how she was before on the physical world, but I speculate based on this evidence she probably didn't think she had much agency in her life (just how she feels in the circus).
At the end, however, thanks to her experience with Gummigoo and looking at the crew grief over Kaufmo's abstraction, Pomni opens herself more to the crew, which is a very good sign.
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I think her current dynamic with Ragatha is wicked cool! ✨️ There's a lot of room for growth, which is good in my opinion. Ragatha clearly cares a lot about Pomni and I think with time she could grow to reciprocate her as well.
Despite her cowardness in episode 1, I always had the feeling that Pomz was deep down a caring individual as well, which was solidly proven in 2 with her interactions with Gummi.
On the fanon side, I saw a lot of fans foaming at the mouth (myself included) over the fact that Ragatha was such a tryhard with Pomni (which was anticipated to be the contrary). Some fans have interpreted their potential dynamics as both being shy, which I really, really like.
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I believe I will definitely include that in my future fanfic. Another idea I wanted to explore is Pomni talking to Ragatha about her overbearing issues, while still appreciating her good qualities at the same time.
I think it's going to be great ☺️❤ I already look forward to what the end result is going to be. I love mutual pining and I love sweet lesbians caring for each other (even when they're silly girlfails). I'm planning to start by submitting chapter 1 by next Friday and submit a new one every following one, as I've done before.
Get ready for digital lesbian shenanigans 🎪💙🎀 See ya!
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lokorum · 6 months ago
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what would you say is your favorite jonmichael fic..... im very curious and love to reread anything in that tag
oh but how can i pick only one when they all are so good??? (,,•᷄‎ࡇ•᷅ ,,)?
aaaaaa can i make the several honorable mentions of the fics that made me scream and roll on the floor?????? pretty please???
scheherazade was one of the first jonmichael fics that i found while going through all of the cher's works because, evidently, they have no fics that are not worth reading!! (i'm sorry if and forty feet down only confirming it!!!)
sleep inertia has one of the best dialogues i ever read!!! the way cruelzy writes michael's lines??? aaaaaaaaa its so delicious and believable and never for a second i thought i'm reading something out of canon?? its just that good. 
carousel is the only one fic (from what i found) that i set in the last season and its adds a lot of layers to that big jonmichael onion that torments my eyes for a while now ldkfjgkdfjg also it's messy?? i mean the whole situation in the fic?? its so humanly complicated and it does not gives you the chance to experience any of the feelings clearly and i love it!! screechfox somehow captured all of the complicated stuff in one fic, blendered it together and for the whole time i just couldn't take my eyes away from it. 
five times michael saves jon's life and one time he doesn't have to - is here to sooth our pain and heal our wounds. i reread it so many times!! the dynamic between jon and michael in it is one to live for!!! sometimes you think 5+1 kind of fics can't surprise you anymore and then the coolest author like paisleycowboys enters the room and proves you wrong. 
to be like super honest, the 100 ways to say i love you series, when i first saw it, made me think im not gonna like it? i love my fanfics long and scary and bittersweet and with a bad-very-not-good-endings, so the title of this one made me go "hmmmmm HMMMMM hmmmmm hmmmm?" but ive started to read it anyway, theres not that many fics on the ao3 for jonmichael, we cant afford to be capricious and gosh GOSH i was so fucking wrong!!! its sweet AND sad AND scary AND awkward (in a best way!!!) AND it made me giggle so many times!!! NeedsCaffeineRightNow can make even the edgiest of us enjoy the soft kinds of fics (its not hard when they are written with so much care and love.)
POSSESSIVE!! MICHAEL!! COMBING!!! JON'S!! HAIR!!!!!! what else do we need from life?
transition, every time i reread it or think about it, makes me painfully aware of how many things should coincide for something to work. it's not one of those fics that completely encompass you; nor its the one that leaves you with new headcanons or in a good mood, no, i think it's the one that leaves you in dissoray, making you want to argue with author, to ask them what were they thinking about, pointing on your weak sides like this?, giving you something precious and then stealing it away? pushing your old bruises? that is to say, i have nothing but deep respect for indefensibleselfindulgence. to write fic that makes you want to engage in conversation? thats powerful 
Our 'Angel' of Static and Bone is written so inexplicably good, that more than once i wondered, how NeverwinterThistle was able to do it? and then i realised they are one of my fave bg3 and dishonored authors phpphp but really, the care, the effort that went into this fic? they are literally visible! you can feel the amount of time and brain juice that went into writing it. and the neighbor character? they appeared like two times?? and still their addition left me speechless with how clever it is, how different!! absolutely amazing work.
adjective noun has jonmichael chapter (11) that destroyed me as a person i swear i laughed so hard i dropped my phone and just kept giggling face-into-the-pillow style!!!!!! its rare for the fics to bring you this childish kind of pure joy; the little in-between moment of forgetting about everything, good and bad, and just have a good time. this chapter is definitely one of those rare things and it also made me wish there would be more jonmichael fics from cuttoth. somehow they nailed everything that should be nailed about this ship and did it in a couple of pages, what a magical work!! 
and well, now here's my fave fic, the one that took my head, shaked it like it's a soda can, and then left it open, fountaining at first and then dented and empty. 
I ask for nothing, but maybe I'm lying is the work that made me grateful for the fact that i know how to read in english. its....mmmm, you know that feeling when fic makes you go through literally everything? and then, as a bonus, through all stages of grief as well?
first you get hooked up by the beautiful writing style and so you know the fic is gonna be good and you get comfortable and you turn yourself off from the rest of the world and you read. 
you love pov, you love mood shifts, you love pacing, you love when scenes are short and you pause to think about what happened / you love when scenes are long and you get overloaded with the simple things that make you feel complicated emotions, you love it all. 
then you start to wish it would never finish; you look at the scrolling bar from time to time, a little bit too aware of how much there's left to read, a little bit too anxious about it. and at the same time, the fic starts to make you feel safe, confident, that at least it's gonna be alright, its gonna be that one work that will replace the canon events for you. it was the
“Oh. Oh, Archivist, no. That’s not right at all,” you say to yourself as you watch him march into artefact storage, both hands clamped around an axe. 
On a whim, you decide to save him."
line for me for sure uhhh it still hits as good as the first time too 
and then you get to the ending and you just stare at the screen. that hollowing feeling slowly spreading inside you. *sigh* its the best sort of inspiration im sure, but its the worse one too. i have no idea how possessedradios and authors like them are able to write something that kills you, then reanimates you and then makes you sit in front of the tablet drawing hours non stop. ''I ask for nothing, but maybe I'm lying" is so beautiful its scares and fascinates me, just like the podcast did. hell, better then the podcast did.  i know its silly but i even named my fisrt fanart of michael as the title of the fic 👉👈
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ahhhh SO i rumbled again SORRY!!!!!!! every time someone asks something from me its either "i'll reply later" (replies 10 years after) or "tolstoy, hold my fucking beer". but i really hope that fic writers, not only those who are mentioned here but like in general? know how much they affect other people!! how their work creates safe spaces for others!! how they make readers smile or cry, even if those readers (im not pointing finger on myself idk what you talking about pgphpphph) are little gremlins that leaving comments once in a decade....................
have fun time reading!! <3
btw im working on a little fanart rn............. (expressing my deepest grattitude to ao3 johmichael writers 😳🔪)
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tenpintsof-sundrop · 1 year ago
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I really really hate to be that person - especially because I know a lot of people are under the impression that fanfic authors are greedy and we should be grateful for any comments we get, even if those comments are full of unauthorized concrit, even if they're kind of rude, even if they're weirdly self-shaming (sometimes insinuating that people should feel bad over reading the dark or smutty content in the fics or that we should feel bad for writing it in the first place even though you're also reading it??).
But like, lately, I have been getting so many comments along the lines of "this fic should be longer!!" "I wish this was a series!!" "please turn this into a series!" "I would read endless sequels of this!!!" - today someone literally commented on one of my fics saying that it was a war crime that the fic was 30k instead of being 'a whole series'. And I totally understand the mindset that if something is good, you want more of it. If you enjoy something, you want more of it. But these comments are definitely not as flattering as people think they are.
When reading those comments - it doesn't always come off as a compliment. Most of my fics range from 5k to 30k on average, and they are usually oneshots or oneshots that I have split into multiple parts in order to be more readable - most of my longer, ongoing series are abandoned because I didn't have the steam to maintain them. (Most people don't know at all how hard it is to write a good, coherent, well-plotted 100k fic and actually keep up with it.) After I post the fic I have written later this week, I will have written over 400k this year alone, with my entire AO3 having over one million words split between 79 different fics.
So often, having people look at my fics and having their only comment be to 'write more' - feels like an insult. Because I do write more. I have written more. I write consistently. (It just sucks that people have almost nothing to say about what I have already written.)
Having people look at my fics - usually very long fics - and go "hey, this would be better if it was longer!!" or "hey, that was good, but the only productive thing I have to say about it is: make it longer" - it always feels very discouraging.
It doesn't make me want to rush to write more of that fic. In fact, most of the time, I actively avoid working on sequels to fics where the only comments are 'more please' because I know the only thing people will say about the sequel is 'when are you gonna make more?' - and oftentimes, I don't intend to make more.
I have said this in another post, but the ending to my fics are always intentional. I don't write fics with the mindset of turning them into a 100 part series. I write fics with the mindset of making them like a film or a short TV series - telling a capsule of a story with a very intentional beginning, middle, and end. And if I write a sequel, it's because I feel there is more to be told - but I will also cap off that sequel with a very intentional ending.
(Also, don't get me started on the complex of - if fics don't have the classic 'happy ending' people feel like every single thread needs to be resolved until it gets to a more classic happy ending, when I love writing intentional melancholic and thoughtful endings.)
Also - in general, I feel like people don't understand how much work goes into a fic. It might take you about 2 hours to read a fic that's 30k (and a lot of people who are avid readers probably read faster than that, reading it in an hour or less) - but concepting that fic, writing that fic, and meticulously editing that fic so that it can be readable and pleasant for people takes upwards of 20 hours of work. I would say realistically, upwards of 30 hours. And those are just working hours - hours sitting at the computer actively working. That doesn't include the time spent in between workshopping the ideas in my head while I am doing other mundane tasks in life.
It's very, very easy to consume a 30k oneshot in one sitting and then hold out your plate and go "more please!!" without putting any thought into how much work went into the original fic.
All of this just to say - please think about these things next time you are commenting on a fic (or even closing a fic without commenting at all), or doing something stupid like generating a fic with AI - which steals from everyday hard working fanfic writers. Fanfiction is hard work - it's a labour of love, and it shouldn't be about blind consumerism where you finish one and then rapidly start looking for the next one. You should appreciate each one like a good, hand pulled taffy instead of gobbling them all down like cheap candy mass made by factory machines.
Yeah - I think that's it.
-your local over worked (but still passionate) fanfic writer
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lookforsomeoneelse · 6 months ago
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Just wanted to say that I love your work and can't wait for more also if you ever run out of ideas then here I had these in my head it's the only things in there so take good care of them please (.1 what if after they failed to bring the reader to them they went to the reader to reverse isekai style. 2 {not sure of your boundaries when it comes to writing so please ignore this if you feel uncomfortable with it also sorry if it makes you uncomfortable} what if reader is hurt like self harm/ assault/ robbery or something like that how would the characters react would they be mad?. 3 what if you made a hand made gift for every character how will they react and for my last idea how would they react to the reader singing or cooking or even the characters reading a fanfic about the reader maybe even a book the reader made?) anyway that's all that's left in this head but remember to take breaks even if you don't feel like you need one trust me you do burn out isn't something that's fun also remember that even if your mind plays tricks on you and tries to put you down remember that you are loved and appreciated also take care of yourself to many people aren't doing that and I don't want to be anyone's mom yet
From 🐉
wow
cool first emoji anon
alright uh
i’m gonna split this into parts
writing the first and second suggestion first because i think they would work well together
Started creation on: 7/7/2024
cw for (implied?) death and the incredible tension and maybe some other things
Breathe in.
Breathe out. Breathe in. Breathe out.
Somebody is in your house. Don’t panic. Whoever it is doesn’t know you’re here. It’s a small, cramped space that you’ve hidden in, but you don’t notice that fact when your life is on the line.
You’re not sure if the intruder is armed or not, but you aren’t giving up your disguise to find out.
A long creak of the door notifies you that they’re definitely approaching your safe haven- which is slowly becoming a danger zone.
You place both hands around your mouth to try and mask some of the sound your breathing produces.
You can hear footsteps.
The light is let in.
You let out a scream.
_________________________________________
They- more specifically the combined intellect of the geniuses of the realm that stood- were sure.
Blue moon the chances may be, the geniuses could hold and draw upon fortune and fate just for this very moment, as the imaginary concepts were drawn in by the thought of the madness they were going to commit once again-
They were trying to see their beloved Guide once again. Having learnt their lessons from the last attempt, the new collider was much more durable and steady; and more importantly, it was safer. Because now the devotees weren’t just attempting to bring the Guidance to them, no, they were trying to transfer theirselves to Their realm.
“Is everything in order? We don’t want to fail a second time, don’t we?” Walking down like a bride on the aisle, the (most definitely) unmarried Herta stared at her work partner, Screwllum.
“Affirmation: Absolutely. The Absolute Exclusion Harness is ready for use. All we need now is for someone to use it. Question: Who will take up the mantle?”
“Me, of course! I had the Harness tailored to my proportions, after all.”
Screwllum paused for a moment, his CPU processing the information given to him.
“…Question: You… brought your actual body here?”
The puppet that Herta was using shut down and fell limp, its eyes going dark as a sign of lost connection. Herta- The real, in the flesh, Herta- waltzed into the room. She looked more mature than most of her puppets, though still quite young for her certain age.
“Of course. What kind of acolyte would I be if I couldn’t even see my master in person?”
”Affirmation: You already know the answer.”
They both remained silent for that fleeting moment, before Herta decided to make her move.
“Start it up.”
_________________________________________
It’s a small, cramped space that she appears in, but she can manage. She knows already that it will lead to the greatest moment of her lowly life.
“Looks like the harness didn’t come with me,” She mused, “I’ll have to improve on the design…. that can wait, though.”
She opens the door to what she assumes is a closet, letting the light in. She ponders why The Almighty would live in such poor conditions compared to what They deserve.
A corpse falls out of the closet she was just in. It brings her disgust.
And then she sees who the corpse is- or rather was.
No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No.
nononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononono nononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononononono
She hadn’t cried in a long time. Her eyes began to pour tears, and when no more were left, she cried blood. Like a child scared of the dark, with a closed door and no nightlight, she held her God ever closer, trying to find some sort of signal that They were still alive- breathing, pulse, brain activity, anything.
In place of her dreams, now there was an eternal nightmare.
Like a banshee, she- and the rest of the universe she called home- would weep.
_________________________________________
First Edition completed on 7/10/2024.
A/N: wow procrastination hit me hard. also i am very sorry for the low quality ending. maybe i might make edits to this? anyway i have more to work on so i’ll get back to the other suggestions later
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vampirepirates · 4 months ago
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⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀
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THE LONG WINTER ( ... ) SANDOR CLEGANE .
Masterlist:
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1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14
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⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀𝔖andor Clegane saw clearer then than he ever had - Lyarra Stark, the lone wolf, would never last a day in the Lion's den. To hell with it, he couldn't help but think. He cared not about winter - nor the pack surviving. He cared not for the Starks to begin with. What he did care about, was making sure the all-encompasing light of Lyarra's eyes never went out. Not while he still lived. ⠀⠀⠀
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⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀"
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ORIGINAL CHARACTER - Lyarra Stark. Twin to Lyanna, sister of Eddard, Benjen, and Brandon.
Lyarra Stark of Winterfell would give her life for her family, while Sandor Clegane would do everything in his power to keep her from doing so. ⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀
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— ⠀⠀INTRODUCING ⠀THE CAST OF ⠀⠀'THE LONG WINTER'
( any other characters not listed simply are casted with their usual faceclaim, or whatever comes to mind! these are just the /main/ characters . )
LYARRA ⠀STARK ⠀— ⠀THE ⠀LONE ⠀WOLF .
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Played by Katie Mcgrath ( ... )
" You cannot ask me to stay — not when my wolf lays trapped in the jaws of a Lion .. "
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SANDOR ⠀CLEGANE ⠀— ⠀THE HOUND ⠀.
Played by Rory McCann ( ... )
" Praying to your Gods, Little Wolf? Good, you're going to need them .. "
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REYNE⠀ 'STARK' ⠀— ⠀THE ⠀LOST ⠀GIRL ⠀.
Played by Alicia Agneson⠀ ( ... )
" I will never allow my fear to overcome my love. Not while I still live .. "
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GOGNI ⠀⠀— ⠀⠀THE ⠀⠀FREE ⠀⠀MAN   .
Played by Travis Fimmel  ( ... )
" I never knew a wolf to accept her cage as willingly as you have .. "
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PETYR ⠀BAELISH ⠀— ⠀⠀LITTLEFINGER .
Played by Aidan Gillen ( ... )
" Trust no one — and yet make sure that everyone can trust you. Loyalty kills more men than fealty .. "
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LYANNA ⠀STARK ⠀— ⠀⠀THE ⠀LOVED   .
Played by Kaya Scodelario ( ... )
" Compassion came easy to her, Lyarra could recall. She had never met someone with more love in her heart, than her sister .. "
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JON ⠀SNOW ⠀⠀— ⠀⠀THE ⠀BASTARD  .
Played by Kit Harrington ( ... )
" I have only known one mother, my entire life. And now I am meant to watch in silence, as she leaves .. "
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TYRION ⠀LANNISTER ⠀— ⠀THE ⠀IMP   .
Played by Peter Dinklage ( ... )
" In my experience, it is a far easier feat to make a friend than an ally! So, let's drink, shall we? "
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— ��             Hello! My name is Zevran! I'll try to keep this short for the sake of my sanity. This is my first official fanfic, so bear with me as I work through this. This fic randomly came to my mind a few weeks ago, and I have not been able to escape it. Some things to note before I start this; Lyarra is not perfect. There will be times where she makes brass decisions, says rude things, and very clearly sides with the wrong people. One example of this, is the nature of her friendship with Petyr Baelish. Petyr is not a good person, and I will never deny this! But he is someone that Lyarra cares for greatly, so I will portray their relationship the best I can. Also, I have never read the books. I just started the first one, but considering I am now writing this -- that will definitely be a slow process. My timeline may be messy, especially considering I am creating my own events and timelines. So if I mess anything up, feel free to let me know -- but know I may not change everything.
Anyways, I hope you enjoy the fic -- and feel free to leave any kind of comment!
             Lover, Hunter, Friend, and Enemy — You
             Will always be every one of these.    Lover,
             Hunter, Friend, and Enemy .. You        will
             Always         be          every       one   of these .
             — Fleurie,                               Love and War .
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choccy-milky · 4 months ago
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A few months back, I asked if it was okay to write using Clora and Seb. Finished the work - thought I'd lost it on my hard drive and a virus scan located it.
Not sure if it's sad or happy, but the basic premise of it is Clora getting frustrated/upset at Sebastian and Sebastian comforting her, Sebastian getting upset at a predicament Clora's in and Clora comforting him, and them both getting frustrated/upset and having to comfort each other.
If you'd rather I didn't post it, that's fine too, but just wanted to test the waters and double check that you'd be okay with it if I gifted it to you via AO3, or see if you wanted a sneak peak of it before posting it.
OMG im so happy you were able to find it and recover the work you did!!😭🙏 AND YES OF COURSE YOU CAN POST IT AAA I CANT WAIT TO READ IT!! you can DM it to me first if you want, but i also dont mind if you post it straight away on ao3!! IM LOOKING FORWARD TO IT SM AAARGHHHA💖💖💖IT SOUNDS ANGSTY WE LOVE THE HURT/COMFORT I HOPE MY HEART CAN HANDLE IT🥺💖💖TY AGAIN FOR USING CLORA AND SEB AND TAKING THE TIME TO WRITE SOMETHING ABOUT THEM😭
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@sunshine-goblin AAA THANK YOU!!! im honoured its your fav fanfic AND ALSO THE LONGEST YOUVE READ BAHAHAA fr, when you say its as long as four books in lotr it rly makes me realize how insane i am😃👍 aw IM GLAD I COULD INSPIRE YOU TO DRAW MORE AND WRITE AS WELL😭 I was curious so i creeped you and everyone go look at their HL blog @sunshines-legacy your MC is so cute and so is your art🥹💖 as for tips on writing a longfic and brainstorming and motivation and stuff, my motivation was my brainrot and unhappiness with the canon story/ending LMAOO, and looking at the story of the game and playing around with what i was unhappy with/what i WISHED could have happened instead, was a lot easier than just coming up with plotlines from scratch. but something i highly recommend is just OUTLINING and making a timeline, one of my fav parts of writing was just putting on some cafe ambience in the background and doing stream of conscious type word documents where id just barf ideas and then worry about making it pretty later....like look at how many versions of the same chapter i have BAHAHA or like different renditions bc i couldnt decide if id wanna keep a scene/what order, so id make a timeline and keep smoothing things out until i was happy with it and whatnot
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brainstorming is defs my fav part of the process and the most helpful part to me. just getting a blank document and writing stuff you want to happen without worrying about how it connects to the story, and then a lot of the times as i was doing that id just keep going and it would kinda tie itself together/id come up with a solution as i was writing / once the ideas kept flowing. so basically : TIMELINES AND OUTLINES I VERY MUCH RECOMMEND, but very low pressure and barebones ones. for example, this is what my outlines/brainstorming look like
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its honestly just me talking to myself LMAO, and a lot of the time ill interject and be like "OH YEAH AND THEN THIS CAN HAPPEN" as the ideas come while im writing BAHAHA. its a super fun process and honestly nothing feels better than just getting hit with that flash of inspo, and since its all very low effort theres no pressure to actually write well and its just a chill fun time AND GOOD LUCK WITH YOUR OWN PROCESS / WRITING💖💖💖it can be difficult but HOPE U HAVE FUN TOO💖💖
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@a-little-lysdexic WAIT REALLY?? LMFAOO OMG THATS CRAZY....SAME BRAIN...🤝🤝...that would trip me up so much if i were you omg BAHHAHA but aside from having similar tastes in names, IM GLAD YOU LIKE MY ART AS WELL, TYY💖💖💖
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THANK YOUUU im glad you're liking it!!! and that its taking over your life BAHAHA💖💖 the video you're thinking of was by @silverxstardust for chapter 13 of my fic, and you can watch the video here! (AND TY AGAIN TO SILVERXSTARDUST FOR DOING THIS!)
youtube
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skibasyndrome · 3 months ago
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why are your kinktober stories all bottom Simon heavy? I trusted we would see more bottom Wille from you /gen
Anon, up front, genuinely sorry if you meant well and are now about to get the brunt of my frustration that I've built up for over a decade of existing in fandoms and fanfic spaces surrounding queer men and their sex.
Ooookay, I try not to engage in this discourse normally because frankly? It's kinda draining, because the way queer men's sex lifes are picked apart in lots of online spaces is not okay and, frankly, hurtful. But, okay:
I have posted 10 of 31 stories
I intentionally don't tag any of my smut as top!/bottom! anything (tho I don't mind other writers doing it - go off) cause frankly? I don't believe that's something that should matter. It doesn't to me when I think of wilmon. Preferences are fine, cool, awesome, both irl and in reading, there are couples who like to do things one way only and there are couples who mix things up and there's lots of stuff in between. People love to bottom! People love to top! People love any- and everything in between and that is great for them. All of that is fun and cool and absolutely awesome if everyone involved is on board. I simply don't have any one way I headcanon wilmon, I literally just go with whatever the vibe is. That also means I don't believe in having to strike a 50/50 balance or whatever. Also because
sex between men (and, since in one of the stories Wille is a trans woman, between all people, for that matter) is about more than anal and/or penetration. I love to read and write about Wille bottoming, love to write and read about Simon bottoming. But that's noooooot all there is. One thing I do try to do with my smut is write about some of the other ways sex can look. Which includes (mutual) masturbation, hand jobs, blow jobs, intercrural, frottage, a myriad of other acts. All of these are fullfilling ways of having sex, all of these don't follow top/bottom "logic" or whatever you'd like to call it. So what do we do about that?
I know some people - not saying you do, this, anon - like to conflate topping and bottoming with power dynamics, be it sub/dom type of stuff, or just... some vague idea of who is superior or whatever. And that very much CAN be the case, I'd argue Wille bottoming in my vampire fic or even Wille during the wax play in the one fic and the intercrural afterwards is definitely bordering sub-y territory. But you know? That also very much doesn't have to be the case. In the fic that includes 69 it's Simon "calling the shots" or whatever you'd like to call it, despite being the one that's being penetrated. I have fics planned out where the opposite is the case, I have plenty of fics where bottoming doesn't have anything to do about being sub or being dom or anything like that. I think there's this idea going around that somehow, (gay) sex acts are linked to power and power exchange and that there needs to be some equilibrium or... justice??? And. No. That's not how consensual sex, be it in relationships or hookups, works in my mind. In consensual sex, there is no disadvantage in bottoming or no need for any of the partners to bottom to fix some sort of hierarchy. Because there is none. Not in the consensual sex of two (or more) partners that want to have sex to have a good time or feel close or relax or any of the other reasons people have sex.
Fair question to ask, just know that I don't write bottom anything for the sake of making a point, I just write whatever feels like the characters would enjoy it in that particular moment in time, whatever suits the POV I wanna go with. I don't keep a tally of times penetrative sex has been part of a story and who did what. If that's a no-go for you, that's fine and I won't hold it against you. I have a bunch more stories coming up with all kinds of dynamics, all kinds of sex acts, all kinds of differently written versions of our two blorbos.
hope this was concise enough and I recognize that I've definitely put all kinds of other, adjacent, points into this, but this gay man right here is kind of fucking sick and tired of seeing stuff assigned to gay sex acts that are just. sex between consenting partners
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jessicaloons · 4 months ago
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E P I L O G U E - Invisible String
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Masterlist - Previous
Hello lovely people, here it is, the Epilogue. Instead of a classic epilogue you’ll get to join Lizzie and Charles in their life together through the years.
I hope you enjoy reading this final part of Invisible String as much as I enjoyed writing it. The whole journey of Lizzie and Charles meant so much to me, finishing it is heartbreaking but relieving at the same time. I know I sent you in for a looong ride with lots of ups and downs with this one and I thank every single one of you who stayed from the very beginning to end now. But also everyone who joined in along the ride, thank you! And to the people who just recently started reading, thank you for taking time out of your day to start reading over 50 chapters of a fic, that started over a year ago! I loved every single interaction with you guys, the comments, reblogs, chats and anons, thank you so much for showing me/my story so much love!
There are a lot of people to thank, starting with my bestie who first was mildly confused by the fact that I was writing fan fiction, but then become obsessed and hated me when I hurt her precious baby boos (her words!) and literally gobsmacked me once or twice, when my "torturing went too far".
My lovely boyfriend fiancé who I met while being in the middle of writing this amazing story, who supported me and even read my story because he was curious, starting to get super invested in it.
And last, but definitely not least, a H U G E thank you to the person, without who this story wouldn’t even exist. Thank you, thank you, thank you @elisysd for not only writing my favourite fanfics, but also for motivating me to write and release my own! Thank you for being my torture partner in crime, thank you for always helping me out with title names, thank you for reading my new ideas, motivating me to continue and develop them into new stories. Thank you for all the conversations about our stories, new ideas, talks about the races, our shared views on certain people, and the talks about what is going on in the crazy whirlwind that is our life’s! I’m so very grateful that I found Cruel Summer (if you haven’t read it till now, DO IT! My favourite fic out there!) last year and that you started a chat with me, because life hasn’t been the same since then. So one final thank you, for literally EVERYTHING ♥️
And now I wrote enough! Some little blurbs, social media posts and a lot of time jumps are ahead, buckle in and let’s f****** goooo!
10th May 2026:
"Shhh Emmie, we don’t want to wake up mummy now, do we?" I whispered, tickling her tummy "I’m almost done, little princess."
I placed everything on the tray, and tried to lift it with one hand, before I picked up Emmie, making my way to our bedroom. Lizzie was still fast asleep, Arlo at the foot of our bed sitting up, looking at Emmie and me.
"Be a good boy." I looked at him and he laid back down, making no sound "Alright…" I sat down the tray on my side of the bed before I pushed the button to open up the shades, letting in the sun, a little groan letting me know that Lizzie wasn’t liking the light intrusion. Pulling the blanket over her head was the second indicator.
"Way too early…" she mumbled and I had to chuckle, Emmie clapping happily.
"It’s not that early…" I climbed into bed, Emmie in my lap, pulling the tray over.
"Everything before 9 is too early." Lizzie yawned, slowly scrambling up, her hair dishevelled. She took in Emmie and me, a big smile slowly spreading over her face "Good morning my beautiful baby girl." she cooed and our little one wriggled out of my lap, crawling over to her mum, cuddling into her side "Hi Emmie." Lizzie picked her up, cradling her to her chest, kissing her cheek, making our little girl giggle.
"Happy Mother’s day, cara mia." I smiled at them, pulling the tray close and turned a little to grab the bouquet of flowers from my night stand.
Lizzie made big eyes, looking from the breakfast on the tray, to the flowers in my hand to Emmie in her arms.
"Oh Charles… this is… this is wonderful." she whispered, leaning over, brushing her soft lips against mine "I honestly forgot about it… Oh god our mums!" she panicked a little and I cupped her cheek.
"They both get a beautiful bouquet and a bottle of the nicest champagne delivered today. Don’t worry. I talked to them, because I wanted to spend today with you and Emmie… it’s your first Mother’s day after all. Today is special." I smiled at her and she looked at me, glassy eyes and pink cheeks.
"You’re amazing…" she whispered and leaned in, kissing my cheek.
"It wasn’t just me, Emmie helped as well…" I said and Lizzie giggled, looking at our little girl, sitting in her lap and looking up at her with big eyes, smile on her face, eating everything up her mum said.
"You’re amazing too, Emmie." she kissed her chubby cheek.
"Ready to eat something?" I asked and she nodded.
"I’m actually starving."
"Perfect, because I made a lot…" I pulled the tray closer and Lizzie’s eyes widened.
"Watching Jamie Oliver and Gordon Ramsay made a real chef out of you…" she chuckled, grabbing a strawberry "Daddy is spoiling us, baby girl."
"Just wait for dinner and dessert." I wiggled my eyebrows, wiping some strawberry juice from Emmie’s chin.
"Ouhhh, I can’t wait!" Lizzie mumbled, looking through the options of food, while I fed Emmie another Strawberry.
"I was thinking we could do a little boat tour today, but because of the race next week it’s so full everywhere, I don’t want to navigate through it with you two…" I said, playing with Emmie while Lizzie munched on her cheese omelette.
"It’s Emmie’s first home race." Lizzie looked up from her plate, gently pinching Emmie’s cheek "You’ll see daddy race here in Monaco, baby girl. Daddy and his Ferrari."
"Rar-… rari…" Emmie babbled and I dropped the melon slice in my hand, Lizzie almost choking on her orange juice.
"Did she just?" I looked at Lizzie, her big blue orbs staring at our daughter "Princess did you just try to say Ferrari?" I picked her up, looking into her gorgeous face.
"Rari…" Emmie repeated, clapping happily.
"Oh my god Charles! Her first word is Ferrari! Well… almost… but oh my god!” Lizzie cheered "Emmie, baby girl, say Ferrari. Fer-ra-ri…"
"I don’t think it’s that easy, cara mia, you can’t just say a word and sh-…" I began but had to swallow my own words.
"Fr- fri-" Emmie chortled.
"Almost baby girl. Fer-ra-ri…" Lizzie tried again.
"Fr-rari…"
"Yes! You did it!" I chimed, littering Emmie’s chubby cheeks with kisses "My little genius baby girl! Ferrari! Your first word is Ferrari! Can you say 'Forza Ferrari'?"
"Okay, now you’re just reaching." Lizzie chuckled, but I ignored her.
"Fr-rari…" Emmie giggled when I kissed her nose "Fr-rari…"
"You’re just jealous that her first word was Ferrari, not Audi!" I smirked and Lizzie rolled her eyes "My precious little princess! I can’t wait to tell everyone about it!"
I cradled her to my chest, kissing her hair and she giggled happily. Lizzie leaned over, tucking some loose strands of her out of Emmie’s face, smiling at her, kissing her cheek.
"You want to try to say 'Audi'? Au-di…" she whispered and I pulled Emmie away.
"What are you doing, cara mia?" I laughed and she sat up, shrugging her shoulders.
"It was worth a try…"
"Even if she would say Audi, which is a way easier name by the way, so… unfair… but okay, her first word would still be Ferrari!" I looked at her and she was pouting a little, my eyes fell on her plush lips, before I looked in her eyes again.
"What about… we finish breakfast, put Emmie down and then we’re having a thorough discussion about what our baby’s first word was?" her voice sultry, lashes fluttering.
"Mhhh that does sound pretty good to me…" I leaned over, capturing her lips in a steamy kiss, biting her bottom lip a little when I pulled away "But it won’t change the fact that our baby girls first word was Ferrari…"
"Fr-rari!" as if on cue Emmie chimed in and I laughed against Lizzie’s lips, a soft smile on them.
"Ferrari it is…" she sighed.
"Ferrari it is…" I laughed.
"Fr-rari!"
7th September 2026:
"Food?"
"Check."
"Drinks?"
"Check."
"Decoration?"
"Check."
"Birthday cake?"
Silence. So I repeated it again.
"Birthday cake?"
"Umm-…"
"Charles! That was the most important thing! You said you would pick it up! I can’t believe you!" I groaned, walking inside, stopping dead in my tracks, the birthday cake sitting on top of the table.
"Birthday cake? Check." Charles chuckled and I puffed out some air.
"So not funny…" I rolled my eyes.
"Sorry, I had to, because someone is panicking a little… it’s going to be just fine cara mia!" Charles pulled me into him, kissing my cheek "Emmie won’t even remember this day, okay? Relax a little, pretty girl."
"Who says that she won’t remember today?" I cocked an eyebrow and Charles sighed.
"Are you serious? No one remembers their first birthday…"
"It’s just… I want this to be perfect…" I said quietly and he rubbed his hands up and down my sides "She’s one Charles, can you believe it? One!"
"Yeah… the last year went by in a blur… one day she was still in your belly the next we’re already celebrating her first birthday…" he replied and I looked around.
"We should take a picture of her. Before everyone is here and she’s too excited to sit still for a moment… just her, a balloon or two, her cake?" I said and Charles nodded.
"I set up a back ground and you get our little princess ready?" he said and I nodded, walking off, but then I stopped, turning around "You forgot something?"
"Yup…" I cupped his cheeks and kissed him "Thank you, for always calming me down… I love you."
"I love you more…" he whispered against my lips and I smiled "Now, get our little princess…"
I walked downstairs, opening quietly the door to Emmie’s room, pushing the button for the shades to open. I smiled when I saw that she was already awake, sitting in her bed, gorgeous smile on her little face.
"Hi baby girl, look at your little smiley face…" I cooed, leaning down and picking her up.
"Mama…" she said, her voice sweet like honey.
"Ready for your party?" I asked, sitting her down and she clapped happily "Yeah? You know that everyone is coming to see you?"
"Evy-one?" she repeated slowly and I nodded, brushing her wild hair.
"Everyone, that means… pops and gammy, granny as well. Your aunties Sissy, Charlotte and Shima. And of course your uncles Lorenzo, Joris, Daniel, Arthur-…"
"Tur!" she said excitedly almost jumping off the changing table.
"Yeah, Uncle Arthur is coming. And of course Liam and Noah." I smiled at her, kissing her cheek "Alright let’s dress you up and then go and find daddy?"
"Dada!"
"Yes, dada."
After putting her hair in a tiny bun, or rather a little palm, on the top of her head, dressing her into a cute dress I picked Emmie up, walking upstairs, where Charles arranged in the corner a little photo background.
"Oh look at my gorgeous girl! Hi princess." he cooed at her and she leaned over to him and Charles grabbed her, holding her close to his chest "Is that okay?" he looked at me and I nodded.
"I’ll go and get the cake…"
I watched Charles putting Emmie down, playing a little with our girl, and had to smile. He was born to be a father, like I always said. I took some pictures of them before I walked over, setting the cake down in front of Emmie.
"You have to watch her closely… I don’t want a foot in the cake… or hands…"
"I’ll take care, don’t worry…" Charles smiled "Ready?" he looked at me and I nodded, then he let go of Emmie and I took some photos.
"Alright. I think I’ve got it…" I showed Charles the results and he beamed at me.
"Perfect. Now let’s get ready for the party. They should all be here in the next minutes…"
And he was right, not even 20 minutes later the living room was full with our family and we gathered around, singing Happy Birthday for the very first time for Emmie.
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February 2027:
"Charles Marc Hervé Perceval Leclerc! Are you serious?!" I sighed and Charles looked sheepishly at me.
"It looked so cute and I thought she doesn’t have one yet…" he said and tried to soften me with his smile.
"Charles! Her room slowly turns into the Ark of Emmie! She has a whole petting zoo full of stuffed animals!" I said as Charles crouched down and handed our toddler the stuffed panda bear. Emmie took it in her arms and cuddled it tight.
"Look! She loves it! As long as she loves it! Cara mia, she’s my pretty princess! Spoiling her is basically my job!" he said and I rolled my eyes.
"I used to be your pretty princess…" I fake pouted and Charles grabbed me by the waist and pulled me into him.
"Oh mon amour, you’re my beautiful queen! And she is our pretty little princess!" he said and kissed me tenderly.
"Mhhh I like the sound of that… my king…" I whispered against his lips, then kissed him again and pushed myself off of him gently. I walked away but stopped in the door "No more toys, Charles! She’s not even 1.5 years old and has already more stuff than 3 toy stores combined!" with that I walked out of the room, but I stayed in the hallway.
"You heard what our queen said, little princess. No more toys for you officially… but rest assured, I’ll bring you more, but that’s our secret!" Charles whispered and Emmie laughed and clapped excitedly.
"CHARLES!" I shouted.
"Oh shit…" he exclaimed.
"Oh shit…" Emmie repeated and I stormed back into her play room "Oh shit, mama. Oh shit, dada!"
"I’m so, so sorry!" Charles said and I glared at him.
"Mami? Dada a stupi io?" Emmie smiled at me and Charles looked flabbergasted.
"Emmie!" I sighed and Charles started grinning.
"No curse words in front of the baby girl I thought, cara mia? What happened to that rule?" he cocked an eyebrow and grinned at me.
"Someone was cutting the line…" I whispered.
"Road rage… I get it." he laughed and then picked up Emmie and pulled me in his arms too "My queen and my princess… I don’t know what I did to deserve this kind of magnificent luck…" he whispered and kissed my temple first and then Emmies cheek, she smiled her almost toothless smile, dimples showing just like her dads.
Bahrain 2027:
"Season opener for the husband on Sunday, charity race for you today with said husband, Max Verstappen, Lewis Hamilton, Jamie Chadwick, Doriane Pin, Maya Weug, Abbi Pulling, Carrie Schreiner and Bianca Bustamate. Excited to be back in the car?" Natalie asked Lizzie who smiled her most beautiful smile.
"Very excited. It’s only 10 laps, so I should be good, but yeah I trained a little with Charles the last weeks and I really hope that I’ll make it." she chuckled.
"First time little Emmie see’s her mummy race, how excited is she?"
"She made huge eyes when she saw me in the race suit and at the seat fitting she pulled at Charles leg and pointed at me, asking why I’m in the car and not he." Lizzie recalled and I had to laugh, thinking about Emmie’s face yesterday.
"So she’s talking now?"
"We’re getting there… but yeah, everyday a little more… if she’s like her dad, she won’t stop talking in no time…"
"It’s good to have you back here, Lizzie. All the best for the little family and of course good luck in the race later! And if I might say that, kick some asses in good old Lizzie fashion." Natalie smiled.
"Thanks, I’ll try my best, I promise!" Lizzie hugged her and walked off, a big smile on her face.
"So I’m the one talking too much?" I cocked an eyebrow and she laughed, kissing my cheek.
"But I love it when you’re talking…"
"Yeah, yeah… let’s go. The race will start soon…" I said, taking her hand, intertwining our fingers.
"It will be fine, you don’t have to worry…" she said, squeezing my hand a little.
"I know… it’s just- it was a risk that you finished your season 2 years ago… and now getting back in the car…" I sighed and she stopped.
"Charles, it’s only 10 laps… I’ll be fine, don’t worry! We talked with the doctor, I’m prepared, we did a lot of workouts-…"
"Mhh… that we did. I liked that." I whispered and she blushed, pinching my side.
"Get your head out of the gutter! We’re racing in 30 minutes!" she rolled her eyes playfully and I laughed.
"Prepare to lose, cara mia."
"Nope. I’m going to kick your ass. All my girls will kick your ass…" she smiled and I pulled her close, kissing her.
"May the best driver win…"
"So Max should win?" she cocked an eyebrow and I pinched her waist.
"Hey!" I pouted and she laughed.
"Let’s go, world champ."
"Did you let her win, because she’s your wife? Be honest." Max wiggled his eyebrows and I laughed.
"Yeah sure and never hear the end of it at home? How she beat me? Definitely not! You couldn’t catch up to her as well!" I looked at him and he scratched his chin.
"Maybe it’s better for us that she’s not in F1 anymore…" he shrugged.
"Yeah, I’m kinda getting used to winning titles." I joked and Max pushed me playfully.
"Yeah, yeah, Ferrari boy. Hold your horses, I’m this close of snatching the title away from you."
"Sure thing, slow bull."
"Ouch, what kind of conversation do I interrupt here?" Lizzie walked up to us and I pulled her in, kissing her gently.
"We just established that we’re pretty damn happy that you’re not in F1 anymore… we like winning and against you… well never mind." Max said and Lizzie laughed.
"Oh you poor boys… maybe I should give Felix a call." I chuckled and Charles shook his head, laughing.
"Please don’t."
"We’ll see." she laughed, walking off when Susie waved her over.
"But in all honesty, this was fun, we should do this more often." Max said as we walked back to the garages and I nodded.
"Definitely. It’s fun and for a good cause, we really-…" I began when a tiny little whirlwind in red ran towards me.
"Papa! Papa!" Emmie’s bright voice made everyone looking for the source of the adorable sound "Uppy!" she stopped in front of me, making grabby hands and puppy eyes.
"Hey my baby girl, you shouldn’t be running around here all alone." I picked her up and she immediately grabbed my face between her chubby, little hands.
"Pop!" she screeched and turned my head to the side, Juergen wiping his eyebrow, sighing relieved.
"And you shouldn’t make Pop sweat like that!" I booped her nose and she started to giggle hysterically, turning her head a little, stopping abruptly when she spotted Max.
"Hi Emmie." he cooed at her and she scrunched up her nose adorably.
"Say hi to Max, princess." I smiled at her and she looked between me and Max for a while before she turned to him, stretching out her hand, poking his cheek.
"Maxie." she said and he nodded.
"You can call me Maxie, that’s alright." Max smiled.
"Maxie…" she repeated and then looked at me "Charlie…"
"Hey! I’m not Charlie! I’m dad-" I began but got interrupted by her giggles.
"Maxie 'nd Charlie." she smiled poking first my cheek, then Max’ "Maxie 'nd Charlie."
"No, Emmie. I’m Daddy, Dad, Pap, Papa, Paps. But not Charlie. Okay? I’m not Charlie." I tried again.
"Charlie… Maxie." she said, nodding.
"Are you really trying to argue with her? You know who her mother is." Max laughed.
"Yep. That I know." I looked at Emmie and kissed her cheek "Thankfully she’s just as adorable as her mum, that saves her."
"Look at you, turned into a big, old softie." Max laughed when Emmie looked at him, a curious look on her face.
"Softie Maxie?"
"No, your daddy, girlie. He’s the softie!"
"No. Maxie softie. Charlie? Down." Emmie turned and looked at me, when she spotted Lizzie a few steps away. I sat her down and looked at her.
"Straight to mum, princess, okay? No detours!"
"Staight to mama." she nodded and bolted off.
I watched her hug Lizzie’s leg who bent down, picking her up. Seeing Lizzie back in a race suit, our daughter on her hip, made me feel all sorts of things and when Max started to laugh next to me, clapping my back I couldn’t stop the grin forming on my lips.
"Oh you’re so down bad for these two…"
"Oh yes… yes I am."
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I watched the replay of the final overtake on the screen, Max next to me chuckling.
"Not gonna lie, after that move, I’m not even mad that you won." he said and I wiped my face with a towel.
"I had to try it, could’ve gone wrong as well…" I shrugged a little.
"Not today, you had an extra lucky charm with you." he nodded towards the screen, showing Lizzie with Emmie, wearing her little Ferrari hoodie, in her arms, standing right under the podium.
"Yeah… how could I not win with her around." I smiled.
"Little unfair advantage…" Oscar joked.
"Make your own lucky charm then." Max laughed.
"Hell no. I’m not ready for that!"
"Believe me. You’ll never be, it just works out magically…" I smiled when he was called out on the podium, followed by Max.
I took one last deep breath and stepped out, the cheering of the crowd almost deafening. But when I stepped onto the highest podium, I looked down. Lizzie and Emmie. Both smiling. Both beautiful. Both cheering louder than anyone else.
"DADDY! DADDY!" I heard her sweet voice carrying all the way up to me, almost jumping out of Lizzie’s arms.
I waved at her, blew her a kiss and her smile got even bigger.
"MY DADDY IS WINNER!" she continued and I felt tears well up. Happy tears.
Win or not today. I already won in life. Big time.
May 2027:
Emmie sat up and looked towards the door, her face lighting up.
"Dada!" she looked at me with her big eyes, clapping excitedly as soon as she heard Charles voice.
"Yes, baby girl, dada is home!" I smiled and she giggled happily, scrambling up on her feet, takings some cautious steps towards the door.
"Dada, I comes!" she screeched and made her way to the door.
I laughed and followed her into the hallway where I saw Arthur kneeling down opening his arms, Emmie slowly waddling towards him. The look on her face changed and she scrunched her nose adorably, realising that something wasn’t right. I heard her sigh and shaking her head slightly.
"You not dada." her voice full of disappointment.
"No, Emmie girlie, I’m not dada." Arthur chuckled "Can I still get a hug from my favourite niece?"
"Only niece." Charles said, appearing behind his brother and Emmie’s face lit up instantly.
"Dada!" she screeched happily, bolting towards her dad, ignoring Arthur’s open arms entirely.
"Ouch…" he mumbled and got up, watching how Charles picked up our little girl.
"Hey baby girl." he smiled at her but Emmie cupped his cheeks, studying his face intently, as to make sure that it was really her dada. Charles grinned, letting his baby girl turn his head to all sides.
"You dada!" she smiled after a while and Charles nodded, kissing her chubby cheeks. Emmie giggled and threw her little arms around his neck, cuddling him.
"Yes, I’m dada. I missed you so much, my little princess." Charles whispered, hugging her close, when Emmie pulled away, pointing at Arthur.
"You not dada!" she said accusatory and he sighed.
"No, Emmie, I’m not dada."
"You Arthie!" Emmie smiled a little and he nodded "My Arthie."
"Your Arthie."
"Dada… Arthie kissie." she looked at Charles with her big eyes and he laughed, walking towards his brother, so that Emmie could lean over, kissing Arthur’s cheek "Hi, my Arthie." she smiled and Arthur kissed her head in return.
"Only your Arthie." he smiled.
"But not dada." Emmie shrugged her shoulders, looking at Charles, smiling adorably.
"No. Not dada, I get it." Arthur shook his head and I laughed.
"Don’t be offended, as soon as Charles comes in, I’m forgotten as well. She’s such a daddy’s girl."
"Just like her mum, she’s crazy for me, what can I say?" Charles laughed, walking up to me, kissing me "Hi, cara mia. You look gorgeous today... you’re glowing!"
"Mama pwetty." Emmie chirped and Charles nodded.
"Mama super pretty, just like my little Emmie." he cooed at her, making her chubby cheeks turn pink "And now you’re blushing just like your mama." she giggled and hid her face in his neck and he sighed contently "You have no idea how happy I am to be back home."
I woke up from Emmie’s faint crying, hastily scrambling up, just to see that Charles was already leaving the room. I sat up, switching the light on, listening into the now quiet penthouse. A couple of moments later, the soft thuds of Emmie’s steps towards our bedroom made me smile. She poked her head around the corner, looking into the room, sighing happily when she saw me and then bolted straight for the bed. I pulled her up, sitting her in my lap and tugged some wild strands of hair out of her face, behind her ears.
"What is it princess? Did you have a bad dream?" I cooed and she nodded.
"Bad fishies…" she mumbled and I kissed her forehead "They meanies."
"What did the bad fishies do?"
"Didn’t lets me play."
"No! How rude!" I gasped and she nodded.
"Emmie?" Charles looked through the door and then smiled "Hey, I was looking for you. I’ve got your princess cup…" he walked over, handing her her little cup and she grabbed it happily, drinking some water "Come on. I’ll get you back to bed and then I’ll tell you what to do next time those fishies are mean!" he held out his hand but Emmie cuddled up into my chest.
"Nu-uh…" she shook her head a little, handing me her cup and I put it down on the night stand.
"Nu-uh?" Charles repeated and she pulled away, sliding down my lap, onto the bed.
"I sleeps here." Emmie patted the mattress next to her, already making herself comfortable.
"Yeah?" Charles asked and she nodded, pulling the blanket up.
"Lightses off." she said and I had to chuckle "Pwease?"
"Can I get in bed before mum switches off the light? I don’t want to stub my toe…" Charles walked around the bed, laying down "Alright." he pulled up the blanket and snuggled into the sheets before he pulled Emmie over, cradling her against him, making her giggle.
"Lightses off now?" her voice muffled.
"Lightses off now." Charles confirmed and I switched off the light, scooting a little closer.
"Good night, my cute little Emmie." I whispered against her head, kissing her.
"Nighty mama." she yawned and Charles kissed her forehead "Nighty dada."
"Good night, my princess." he whispered and then looked up, smiling at me "Good night, my queen."
July 2027:
Pregnant. The second test showing the same result. The mood swings, stomach bugs, my overly emotional state at times, it all made sense now.
"Whats dis?" Emmie asked, looking at the test in my hand "Is it toy?"
"No girlie, no toy…" I breathed out and she scowled a little.
"Why no toy?"
"Because not everything is a new toy for you."
"Dada always buys toys…"
"Yeah, because dada can’t resist your puppy eyes!" I chuckled, looking down at her.
"New puppy for Emmie?"
"No. Not a new puppy for you. It’s- umm well it’s… it’s something for mum and dad." I smiled at her "But you know what? It’s not a toy, but you’ll be able to play with it still in some time…"
She happily clapped her hands, beaming up at me.
"Tank you Mama for new toy."
"Not a toy, Emmie." I leaned down, cupping her cheek "A little brother or sister…"
"You’re pregnant?"
I flinched and looked up at Charles standing in the bathroom door frame, wide eyed, looking at me.
"Umm…" I grabbed the pregnancy tests and handed him the two sticks "Yeah…"
"We’re having another baby?" Charles breathed out, his eyes wandering between the tests in his hand, me and then Emmie on the floor.
"Looks like it…" I said quietly "Is that okay? I mean-… we talked about it… but never about the when…"
"It’s perfect, cara mia…" he stepped closer, cupping my cheeks "We’re having another little one…" he kissed me and Emmie got up, pinching his leg.
"Want kissie too." she pouted and Charles picked her up, tickling her belly.
"You’re going to be a big sister, princess. Are you excited? You’re getting a little brother or sister!" he cooed at her kissing her chubby cheeks.
"Big sis-sissie?" she tilted her head a little.
"Big sister, munchkin." I said slowly.
"Big sista…" she repeated and I smiled.
"That’s it. Well done pretty girl." Charles kissed her cheek again "You’re going to be an amazing big sister, I just know it!"
"The bestest!" she chirped.
"The best, girlie. It’s just the best."
"Na-uh… bestest." she shook her head and cuddled into Charles chest "Bestest, bestest, bestest."
"Okay… bestest is it- for now." he said and Emmie giggled, kissing his cheek, wrapping her arms around his neck.
"Emmies always right." she said and I laughed.
"She’s 100 per cent your daughter!" Charles and I said in unison and then laughed even more.
"Daddy, down pwease." Emmie said and Charles sat her down "Arlooo… me’s a be big sista…" she shouted, running away.
"Ready for another one?" I asked and Charles grabbed me by the waist, pulling me close.
"Another little trouble maker? I can’t wait… I think we can handle two…" he kissed me and then leaned his forehead against mine "I love you, cara mia. You, Emmie and the little one in your belly… I can’t wait for another baby…"
"Then I call the doctor for an appointment…" I whispered and he nodded.
"I want to be here for the first ultrasound…" Charles whispered back and I smiled.
"I’ll make sure of it… even if it might take a little longer then." I pecked his lips and he smiled.
"And there… oh there they are!" the nurse said and my eyes widened.
"They?" I asked and Charles looked confused.
"Yes, here we have baby number one and here is baby number two. Congratulations, you’re having twins!" the nurse smiled.
"Twins?" Charles repeated.
"Yes, Mr. Leclerc, you and your wife are having twins!" she nodded.
"How?" he asked and the nurse laughed.
"Happened the same way like it did with your daughter…" she chuckled and got up "I’ll leave you alone. If you’re dressed come up to the front desk."
"Charles, hey? Pretty boy, are you alright?" I asked as Charles sat next to me, visibly panicking.
"Twins, cara mia! Twins! I barely kept Emmie alive! How am I supposed to take care of two babies at the same time?" he said with a worry laced voice.
"Did I miss something?" I chuckled and Charles looks at me confused "Am I leaving and you’re alone with them? Besides, 'barely kept Emmie alive'? Charles you were born to be a dad! You were so very good at it, you know how jealous I was at times!"
"Yeah for absolute no reason…" he rolled his eyes a little and I sighed.
"We both did good, okay? Emmie turned out just great and with these two it will be just the same…" I cupped his cheek, rubbing circles on it "It’s going to be fine… okay?"
"Twins, cara mia… can you believe it?" he whispered and I sighed a little.
"I’m going to get so huge… blue whale like…" I mumbled.
"Beautiful. You’re going to be so freaking beautiful. Like you always are, just with a little more-…"
"… fat on the ribs and basically everywhere?" I groaned.
"Hey, stop that!" he pinched my waist "I wanted to say just with a little more of that gorgeous glow you had when you were pregnant with Lizzie… you’re going to be the most beautiful girl out there cara mia… you and Emmie of course." he kissed me and I had to smile.
"Three little rascals…"
"Three little rascals…"
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May 2031:
"Why do you look so nervous?" Lizzie asked and I shook my head slightly "She’ll be fine…"
"How do you know?"
"Because she’s our daughter?" she chuckled and I rolled my eyes "She’ll be fine." she said again, cupping my cheek "You taught her everything she needs to know."
"I hope so…" I said underneath my breath and watched as the race director waved the flag, signalling for the race to start.
I closed my eyes and took one last deep breath before I watched the race unfold before our eyes. Emmie was fearless as well as ruthless, making up 5 positions in the first few corners.
"Fucking hell…" Arthur let out next to me, his eyes widening in horror when he heard the loud gasp from Elio on his shoulders.
"Arthi said bad word!" he chirped and I glared at Arthur.
"Yes Arthur, you said a very bad word!"
"Fucking hell!" Enzo said proudly, leaning his back against Lizzie, swinging his dangling legs back and forth.
"Enzo!" Lizzie warned him and he rolled his eyes groaning "Mister!"
"Fucking hell…" he repeated and Arthur mouthed an apology towards me.
"Enzo Doetterer-Leclerc. Stop it." I picked him up from the banister he was sitting on, making him look at me "No bad words. And no bad attitude."
"Yous boring." he mumbled, poking my cheek "Arthi funny."
"Nope, little man. I said a bad word. We don’t say bad words. Mum and Dad are right." Arthur tried it and Enzo sighed.
"Yous boring too."
"And you’re a little menace." I tickled his sites, making him giggle.
"Stop! Paps stop!" he laughed but I kept going "Not saying bad wordses again! Pomis!"
"You promise me?" I stopped, looking at him and he nodded.
"Pomis."
"Okay, now let’s watch your sister…"
"… winning her first race…" Lizzie finished and I followed her look, watching Emmie starting her last lap, a huge gap between her and the rest.
The moment Emmie crossed the finish line and stopped her kart, she jumped out, running towards us, happily screaming.
"I won! I won! Did you see that? I wooon!" she pulled her helmet off, hairs standing up in all directions "I WON!"
"You did amazing, Ems!" Arthur pinched her cheek a little and she chuckled.
"Did you see that?" Emmie looked at me and I nodded, hugging her.
"You were amazing princess!"
"We’re so proud of you!" Lizzie bend down, kissing her cheek "So, so proud."
Emmie smiled and wiped her face with a towel Lizzie handed her and then grinned.
"I kicked the boys asses." she chuckled and Lizzie pressed her lips into a thin line, trying her best not to laugh "They didn’t even had a chance."
"You’re a menace too." I said and Arthur laughed.
"Look what you guys did. Created 3 little menaces to the society." he nudged my shoulder.
"That we did."
May 2033:
I watched the twins getting into their race gear. Both with a big smile on their faces, chatting overly excited with Arthur and Pops.
"Dad?" Emmie poked my side and I looked down at her "Mummy is looking for you. She’s talking to Maxie."
"Please tell me you said Maxie to him…" I chuckled and she grinned "Good girl. Go help your brothers we’ll be there any minute." I kissed her head and she sauntered off, pinching her brothers as soon as she was close enough.
I looked around, finding Lizzie and Max standing at the exit, talking away.
"Hi Maxie." I said, chuckling when he rolled his eyes.
"Your kids can call me that, you? Definitely not."
"Oh come on, Maxie. Don’t be a party pooper."
"Lizzie, tell your husband to stop." Max looked at her and she just held up her hands.
"I didn’t want to get dragged in between you almost 30 years ago, I don’t want to get dragged between you now. You two are big boys. Behave." she chided and I laughed.
"I’ll tell you something. I’m only allowed to call you Maxie if I win the title this year, equalling with your 5 titles."
"Deal." Max said with not hesitation and I cocked an eyebrow "Mate your car is… well it’s not shit like at some seasons in the past… god just think back at 2023-…"
"Or 2020!" Lizzie added.
"My point is. 8 races in and you won how many? One? Only Monaco… I mean…" he shrugged.
"Just out of spite I have to win now." I said and Lizzie laughed.
"Look what you made him do…"
"You should’ve just retired like me last season." Max said, scratching his chin but I shook my head.
"No, I could feel that I have one more title in me. And I’ll win it, to prove you wrong. And then I’ll call you Maxie all the damn time." I punched his arm and he laughed.
"Alright. If you say so… for now I want to see our boys race. Let’s go." he said and I nodded, taking Lizzie’s hand.
"Let’s just hope these boys are not like you two…" she chuckled and Max and I looked at her "What? You were track terrors… and whoever got caught in between you two? Yeah no…"
"You were worse than us!" I chuckled and Max nodded.
"Yeah… if all, we have to hope that they are not like you!" he said and Lizzie glared at us "Oh… there it is, the Lizzie-death-glare… I wish I could say I’m not scared but… that would be a lie."
"Yeah, now imagine being married to her!" I said and Lizzie pinched my side.
"If you boys are ready now? There are 3 boys about to race and I don’t want to miss that…" she stomped away and I sighed.
"You know that I’ll have to pay for that back at home…" I chuckled and Max laughed, following Lizzie.
I sat down next to Lizzie on the bleachers, Emmie, Arthur and Juergen in front of us. Max sat down next to us and we watched excitedly the race start. Enzo leading into turn 1.
"He’s really good." Max commented and I smiled proudly.
"That he is."
"Just like his dad…" Lizzie said, and I threw my arm around her shoulder pulling her close.
"And like his mum!" I kissed her cheek, watching Enzo increasing the gap "But damn he’s fast…"
"That’s because he’s fearless… look, he’s almost not braking at all in the corners…" Arthur said.
He was right. Enzo was fearless, going into corners almost at full speed, dive bombing later than anyone I’ve ever seen. He won the race by such a big margin that he already had parked his kart and got out when Max’ son, Eric, parked behind him, followed by Elio.
"What a race…" Max clapped his hands and got up, and we walked down to our sons "Arthur is right, you know? Enzo is fearless…"
"He is. Not sure I like that…" I replied and he chuckled a little.
"Yeah… I feel you…"
"But then again. If he continues like this? He could make it pretty far…" I said as we stepped on the track, Enzo, Eric and Eli joking around.
"Yeah, if he wants to." Max said, taking Eric’s helmet "Hey buddy, good race."
"Yeah, couldn’t catch Enzo though… he’s crazy…" Eric said and Enzo chuckled, handing me his helmet "You drive into the corners without braking!"
"That’s how you win!" Enzo shrugged his shoulders and I chuckled.
"Or end up in a wall." Elio said and his brother rolled his eyes.
"It won’t happen, your brother is not stupid." I said and Lizzie chuckled next to me.
"Yeah… he’s not his dad…" she said and Max and Arthur began to laugh.
"Very funny…" I rolled my eyes when the race director waved at us "Boys, you’re needed…"
I ruffled the boys hair and they ran off, stepping on the little makeshift podium. It was the seventh race of the season and already the sixth win for Enzo, who got better each week. He jumped excitedly up and down on the top step on the podium waving at us happily.
"Look at him… he reminds me so much of you…" Juergen said, standing next to me "Whenever you were on the podium you were super giddy and couldn’t contain your excitement."
"He loves it… racing, the speed, the adrenaline, winning… Elio on the other hand…" I began and he nodded.
"He loves it too, but for him it’s more a hobby… while for Enzo… it’s everything."
He was right. Elio had fun. He enjoyed karting. But apart from the track, his mind wasn’t occupied with karting, not like his brothers, who couldn’t stop talking about karting, or racing in general. Enzo lifted his trophy over his head and cheered happily, waving at us and I smiled.
"Look dad! Another one!" he screeched, running over to us.
"Soon you’ll need a whole trophy cabinet!" I said and he nodded.
"Or I can put them next to yours and mum’s trophies in your trophy room?" he looked at me with big eyes, when Elio joined us, smiling shyly, presenting his smaller trophy.
"I tell you what, both of you, and Emmie, get a shelf in our trophy room…" I said and they both beamed up at me, running off again.
"You have a trophy room? Like… seriously?" Max asked and Lizzie cocked an eyebrow.
"Where? In our penthouse? You mean your office/ studio/ storage room? Where all of our trophies are kept in boxes?" she asked and I laughed.
"I mean… we could turn it into a trophy room." I shrugged my shoulders and she laughed.
"Sure. You do that…" she replied and I groaned "Your idea, you told your kids, so you do that…"
"Pops?" I looked at Juergen who just chuckled.
"Sure, I’ll help you… and maybe you can put your fifth world champion trophy in at the end of the year…"
"Let’s hope so…"
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June 2038:
I watched as Emmie practically beamed at him, hanging at his lips, soaking in every word he said. I groaned a little and Lizzie looked up from adjusting Enzo’s helmet.
"What?" she asked and followed my look, then she chuckled.
"Do you see how she looks at him? She’s too young for these kinda looks!" I muttered.
"Charles, she has a crush on him! At her age I already had a huge crush on you too!" she laughed but I shook my head.
"That’s different… we knew each other for almost 5 years at her age! And I wasn’t so… so…" I rambled and Lizzie laughed even more.
"So what?" she asked and I sighed.
"So slimy! God, look how he laughs!" I groaned.
"Enzo, you’re all good, why don’t you go to Arthur, he’ll help you with your kart…" Lizzie send Enzo away "Love? She’s 13. She has a crush on Nick. That’s it. They won’t get married tomorrow. So relax, please."
"He won’t marry her in 10 years either! Never. I don’t like that boy!" I huffed out and Lizzie rolled her eyes. Both watching as Emmie put her helmet on, walking towards Enzo and Arthur. "Alright. I’ll be right back."
"Charles! Be nice!" Lizzie whisper shouts at me as I made my way over to Nick, but I just waved her off. The boy was about to grab his helmet as I grabbed it first, handing it to him.
"Here you go…" I said and Nick made big eyes.
"Th-thank you Mr. Leclerc…" he stuttered and I smiled at him. As he put his helmet on and sat down in his kart I crouched down next to him.
"That’s a nice kart you’re having. Looks fast." I said with an overly friendly voice.
"My dad and uncle worked on it together." he said nervously and I nodded.
"I saw you talking to Emmie, yeah, you know, she’s a tough girl. Ruthless on track. Very talented. Fast." I stated casually, checking his engine out "But you see, no matter how old she is, she’ll always be my little princess… and if everyone were to hurt her, make her sad, god forbid, break her heart? Make her cry… oh well."
"I don’t know what you mean… Emmie is… she’s great… but I didn’t…" he began to ramble but I just held up my hand, making him stop abruptly.
"What I’m saying, Nick, is… that’s a really nice kart you’re having… if you want to keep it that way… you better be as sweet as honey to my Emmie…" I smiled at him and got up "Because during these karting races accidents happen so fast…" I gently closed his visor "Good luck, Nick!" I said loudly and Lizzie looked over, smiling at me.
She didn’t have to know everything that I’m doing.
July 2037:
I watched as the kids cuddled him, one by one. Scratching his ears. Showering him with kisses.
"What did the doctor say?" Lizzie whispered and gently stroked by back, holding my hand.
"He won’t make the night. He said we should give him all his favourite treats…" I answered, voice broken and hoarse.
"I can stay with you? Lorenzo and Charlotte can pick up the kids and I stay with you and then we’ll go tomorrow together…" she began but I shook my head.
"You should be with them, they shouldn’t be alone…" I whispered and Lizzie nodded, kissing my cheek, wiping away some stray tears.
She walked down the lawn, sat down next to the kids and cuddled Arlo. His ears immediately stood up, of course, his mum was there. After a while they all said their final goodbyes, coming back in, Emmie hugged me immediately.
"You’ll stay with him, right? He won’t be alone?" she cried and I nodded.
"He won’t be alone, no. Not a single moment." I kissed her head and the twins squeezed right into our hug.
"Will he be in pain?" Elio’s voice barely above a whisper.
"No, little one. The doc gave him some medicine. He won’t feel anything. He will fall asleep…" I began and Enzo cried out.
"And then he won’t wake up anymore?" he asked and I nodded.
"He won’t." I swallowed hard and Lizzie gave Arlo one last kiss, then walked inside.
"We have to go now, come on. Dad will take care of our good boy." her voice was laced with tiny sobs. The kids slowly pulled away and I kissed them one by one on the forehead as they headed into the foyer, grabbing their bags.
"Will you be okay?" Lizzie whispered, pulling me into a tight embrace and I felt tears streaming down both our faces.
"Yeah… I’ll see you tomorrow…" one last kiss and she left with the kids.
I took a deep breath and walked outside, sat down next to Arlo on the soft lawn, the setting sun shining softly above us. He held up his head, tilting it a little and it reminded me of the day where I brought him home to our old flat. How I couldn’t tame him and knew that he would be a piece of work. All those years ago. Lizzie’s eyes, when she saw him, lighting up. The tears she cried. Happy tears. So many happy tears. The moments when Lizzie was pregnant first with Emmie, later with the twins. How protective Arlo was. Always looking out for his mum. Always putting his head on her belly. I scratched him behind his ears and he closed his eyes. Laying his head in my lap.
"Good boy. My Arlo. You can rest now. You took care of your mum and the kids whenever I couldn’t be here. Thank you, my sweet boy. I love you." I leaned down, kissing his head. I could hear his breathing becoming more shallow with every breath he took. I kept on stroking his soft fur. Giving him belly rubs. Kissing his head. Thinking about all the memories our little fur baby gifted us with. "I will miss you, Arlo. I love you. So much!" I whispered after a while and looked down. Watching closely. He wasn’t breathing anymore. Realising that he was gone "Goodbye, my Arlo."
September 2041:
"What’s up?" I asked, looking at Charles who just walked in "You look like you’ve seen a ghost?"
"That was John… he offered me the position as director of the FDA… starting next season…" Charles said and Enzo looked up from his iPad.
"Oh wow! Congrats Charles!" I got up from the barstool and kissed his cheek.
"Thanks…" he mumbled and I looked at him.
"You don’t sound too happy? You don’t want to do it?" I asked, but he shook his head.
"No, of course I’m happy. It’s just…" he stopped and looked at Enzo.
"I have to work now even harder… or people will say that I only got into the FDA because of you…" he said and Charles nodded.
"But that’s ridiculous. Everyone can see how talented you are. Also, you’re only 13… you won’t make it into the FDA for the next two or three years anyways…" I said, patting his arm but he sighed.
"Your mum is right, Enzo. Also, just because someone is in the FDA, doesn’t grant them a seat in a car." Charles said and I nodded.
"Yeah… sure." Enzo smiled and got up, hugging him "Congrats dad." he then grabbed his iPad and left the kitchen.
"Hey? It’s going to be just fine, okay? He’s talented. One of the best, if not the best… no one will think otherwise." I snaked my arms around Charles neck, pulling him closer "I’m so proud of you, my pretty boy."
"Thanks, cara mia." he smiled and kissed him, then he leaned his forehead against mine and he exhaled loudly "He really is the best right now… if he continues like this? Prema is already interested, also Carlin…"
"See? And that all without your help…"
"It’s 50% of my DNA in him, so I’d say a little of my help…" he laughed and I shook my head.
"You’re an idiot… but a cute one… so, yeah… that’s fine…"
September 2044:
"Okay… what’s going on here?" Enzo asked after a while, looking at Elio then at me "You said that there is something important we need to talk about, now we’re sitting here for ten minutes and nothing happened… I could sit in the simulator, you know?"
"Enzo!" I glared at him and he rolled his eyes a little.
"Sorry. But-… whatever." he groaned, crossed his arms and leaned back in the sofa.
"Elio, sweetheart? What is it?" Lizzie asked him quietly, smiling at him and he looked at me.
"It’s okay, take your time…" I encouraged him and he took a deep breath, closing his eyes.
"Maybe not that much time, Nick is going to pick me up in… half an hour." Emmie said, looking at her phone.
"Nick?" I looked at her and Lizzie shook her head "And where are you and Nick going?"
"To Clara, she’s having a party with drugs and alcohol." Emmie rolled her eyes and I glared at her "We’re just going to the movies…"
"To the movies?" I repeated and she nodded.
"Charles? We’re here because of Elio, remember? So… focus." Lizzie said and I knew that tone.
"Can Elio then please speak up?" Enzo said and Emmie nodded.
"Yeah, I’m not done with my hairs yet…"
"Guys!" Lizzie and I said.
"I’m gay." Elio blurted out and the silence was loud.
He looked at me, then Lizzie, Emmie, both smiling, and lastly Enzo, who didn’t react at all.
"That’s wonderful, sweetheart. Thanks for telling us!" Lizzie got up and kissed his cheek, followed by Emmie, who hugged him.
"You’re damn brave, little bro." she chuckled and he smiled at her.
Enzo still didn’t react and I was about to say something, when Elio beat me to it.
"Zo?" he asked quietly.
"What? I thought you would tell us a secret or something?" Enzo replied and we looked at him.
"What do you mean?" Elio asked.
"You think I didn’t knew? We shared a womb, dumbass? I think I knew it before you knew it yourself. My point is. More girls for me, because now all the girls who like the tortured poet that is you, will come to me now… thanks for that, El." Enzo got up, clapped his brothers back and walked away "I’m in the sim… Singapore is next…"
"Unbelievable…" Emmie shook her head, kissing Elio’s cheek "Love you." then she was gone as well.
"Umm- I guess that’s it then?" Elio shrugged, following Emmie.
"That was…" I began but then shrugged.
"Well, they’re clearly your kids…" Lizzie chuckled "Or at least Enzo through and through…"
"Not gonna argue with that."
Monaco 2046:
"Why are you so nervous?" Emmie put down her headphones, watching Enzo anxiously replaying old videos from the Monaco Grand Prix "You know those streets better than anyone else? Dad used to drive the track with us almost daily when we were younger…"
"It’s not the same like in an F2 car! Especially after having 3 shitty races in a row… and after all it’s Monaco… not the easiest track for our family…" he mumbled and Charles rolled his eyes a little.
"Ooouuuhhh you touched there a sore spot, Enzo." I said and Charles glared at me "Oh don’t look at me like that."
"You should’ve never mentioned this stupid statistic…"
"First of all, I didn’t mention anything, it’s all over the internet and second of all, it’s not a statistic, it’s a curse-…" I began but he interrupted me.
"Curses don’t exist! You’re all too superstitious."
"Oh really? We are superstitious?" I cocked an eyebrow and our kids looked between us.
"Yeah, you are, curses don’t exist, stupid rituals or whatever don’t help… it’s just about you and the car and your abilities… nothing else!"
"Says the guy who wore red pants on every quali day because he wore red pants when he got his first pole."
"That was not because of that…" Charles protested but one look and he stopped.
"And then stopped wearing red pants on quail day because during a shitty season 2023, when nothing worked out for him he once didn’t wear red pants on quali day and got pole position… the next time he forgot them, he got pole position again and from then on he never wore red pants on quali day…"
"Whatever." Charles groaned and I had to chuckle.
"Just admit it, you were just as superstitious like the rest of us!"
"Nope." he shook his head.
"Oh come on dad, not even a little?" Emmie looked at him, big puppy eyes on full display.
"I mean… I just don’t believe in it…" he sighed.
"Maybe that’s the topic of my next podcast? Drivers and their rituals and superstitions?" she thought and I nodded.
"That would be interesting! You should talk to Arthur, he also had a weird ritual…" I smiled at Emmie and she already scribbled something down in her little notebook.
"Didn’t uncle Arthur also crash out in Monaco?" Elio asked, looking up from his phone and I nodded "But you didn’t? Not in F2 not in F1?… well maybe it’s just a Leclerc curse then… therefore Enzo you’re cursed."
"Okay, stop that now!" Charles rolled his eyes, glaring at me "Look what you’ve started!"
"Me? I didn’t start shit!" I said
"Language!" Enzo, Emmie and Elio said in unison, cackling away.
"Very funny…"
"Hey, you made us watch that old movie! What was it called? Aviators?" Elio asked.
"Avengers." Charles and I said and he grinned at me.
"Same thing." Elio mumbled.
"We kinda lose the plot here! Dad’s Monaco curse and Enzo shitting his pants driving here." Emmie wiggled her eyebrows at her little brother, who threw a bread roll at her.
"Enzo Doetterer-Leclerc! We do not treat food like that!" I reprimanded him.
"Sorry… but she’s egging me on! And it’s-it’s…" I saw how frustrated he was, but before I could react Elio already seemed to be having an idea.
"If it’s a Monaco curse and that only applies to Leclerc drivers… maybe you dropped the wrong last name then? Maybe for now you should go by Doetterer." he said matter of factly and I looked at Charles, his jaw clenched, a muscle ticking.
"If you want to drop my name, because you want to driver under your mums name? Fine by me. If you drop your name because of a stupid, not-existing curse… that’s something different…" he looked at Enzo who shrunk a little under his dad’s gaze.
"No one is dropping anyone’s name. You chose Leclerc, and I get it, shorter, easier to pronounce, the name of a five time world champion. Also 5 time winner of the Monaco Grand Prix! You studied the track, and now you get into your car and you focus on nothing else but the car and the track. Whatever happens then, happens." I said and Enzo sighed.
"I just want to make you guys proud…" he mumbled and Charles look softened, grabbing him by the shoulders.
"We are proud of you, Enzo! It’s not so easy coming fresh out of F3 and your fourth race in F2 is already Monaco, but you’ll manage, okay? And if not? That’s also not the end of the world… it took me years to even finish our home race…" he said and Enzo nodded slowly.
"It’s going to be fine, Enzo, you’ll see." I said and he got up.
"And if not, you’re just continuing a family tradition." Emmie laughed and walked away, dodging another bread roll.
"Don’t listen to her. Your mum is right, it’s going to be just fine." Charles smiled at Enzo who just sighed "Let’s watch the races together. Maybe I have some tips and tricks on what to do…"
"Rather on what not to do…" I chuckled quietly, a bread roll hitting me straight at the temple.
"You deserved that one…"
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October 2046:
"Dad? What are you doing here?" he was surprised, I could tell.
"I wanted to see your work." I answered simply and he looked at me confused "Jo told me that you asked him for advice, what pictures to choose. And then I found the flyer in the rubbish bin. Crumpled."
"I mean, I know how busy you are with the FDA and Enzo in F2 now, preparing for F1 next season." he mumbled and I just shook my head.
"Elio, I’ll always make room for you and your passion. If I know about it…" I said and he nodded sheepishly.
"I know… it’s just that…" he began but then stopped.
"That what?" I asked and he sighed.
"I just thought that this is nothing that would interest you… I mean Emmie is studying sports journalism. Has her F1 podcast and blog, everyone loves her and she has so many subscriptions! Enzo is stepping right into yours and mums shoes, starting in F1 next year. And me? I’m not in any way like them. I like F1. As a fan to watch. But that’s it. I just thought that…" he said and now I sighed.
"You thought what? That I wouldn’t be proud of you, wouldn’t be interested in what you’re doing because it’s not F1 related?" I asked and he nodded and looked down "How many times do I have to tell you, that I’m proud of you, no matter what! Any passion of yours, is something I’m interested in, Elio."
He swallowed hard and looked up, then he turned a little, pointing behind him.
"Do you want to see my pictures?" he asked and I nodded excitedly.
"Did you know, when I was younger I was also really interested in photography! I just wasn’t as talented as you!" I said and he looked at me.
"I didn’t know that…" he replied and then pointed at the 5 pictures in front of us.
One showing Lizzie and me in our garden, another one was from Enzo as he was breezing past me and Emmie in the feature race of the last Monaco GP, the one in the middle a shot of an old F1 car engine, one from a wild and rough countryside, the last one a busy street in London, with Emmie in front, pointing at something.
"Wow Elio, these are amazing…" I whispered, taking a step closer.
The photographs were impressive. The colours. The contrast. The lighting. I loved every single one.
"Thanks dad… for being here…" Elio said after a while and I looked at him.
"This is what you should do, you know? I think you could be an amazing photograph…" I said and he smiled.
"Yeah… maybe I will one day…"
I left my office, heading downstairs when Stella, John Elkann’s assistant bumped into me.
"Sorry Stella, didn’t see you." I smiled apologetically.
"It’s fine Mr. Leclerc-…"
"Charles. I told you before, it’s just Charles…"
"Charles, of course. Umm do you have a minute?" she asked and I nodded.
"Sure, what’s the matter?"
"Mr. Elkann wants to talk to you. I sent you an invitation for a meeting next week, but we came here this morning on a whim and you know Mr. Elkann…" Stella smiled at me and I followed her.
"Yeah, if you can do it now, do it." I nodded "Do you know about what this meeting is?"
"Umm- I do… but it’s better if he tells you this…" she said shyly and I got nervous "Oh it’s nothing bad!"
"You sure? The big boss comes in just to chat?" I said and she smiled.
"You’ll see. He’s waiting for you." she knocked on the office door and opened it, letting me in.
"Charles, good to see you!" John got up from his chair and hugged me "How are you? The kids? Lizzie?"
"We’re all good, thanks." I smiled, still a little nervous.
"Enzo must be excited, now that he has a seat in F1 next year. It was only logical that we would want our best driver from the academy, soon to be F2 champion in our junior team in F1 next season."
"Yeah, he’s really excited. He is really grateful for this chance, I mean, we all are of course."
"He’ll make us proud, I have no doubt in that."
I smiled and nodded only.
"Okay, I make this quick, I don’t want you to have a heart attack. Charles, you did an amazing job as the director of the FDA, but now we think it’s time for someone new…" he began and I felt my stomach twisting "… because we would like you to step up and become the new team principal of Ferrari."
"Sorry what?" I was confused.
"We want you as team principal for the Scuderia Ferrari, starting next season."
"Me? As team principal? Ferrari. The F1 team?" I almost stuttered and he nodded.
"Yes. You’re the right one for the job. You know the team, the sport. You know how it works. We believe you’ll be amazing… so? What do you say?" John looked at me hopefully and I tilted my head a little.
"If I agree, I have one condition…" I said slowly.
"Of course. What is it?" he asked and I began to smirk.
"Monza. All black suit. All black car. And I mean all black. Not some weird grey patterns on black. Or some black car parts. All black. I’ve been deprived of it my whole career, when I wanted nothing more than to drive an all black car, wearing an all black suit…" I said and John looked at me for a moment before he laughed, leaning back in his chair.
"Oh how I remember the disappointment in your eyes when they showed you the suit for Monza 2025?-…"
"2024… and then 2027 again…" I added.
"… yeah. You hated the 2024 suit. And the livery…" he finished wiping tears away.
"I thought 2023 was bad… but that topped it I think…" I shrugged my shoulders.
"Alright Charles, Monza is black. But not every year, no? But the upcoming season for sure. Do we have a deal then?" he got up, buttoning his jacket close as I got up as well.
"We have a deal." I said shaking his hand.
"Well then it’s official, Charles Leclerc, new team principal of Scuderia Ferrari."
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January 2047:
"Elio? There's a letter for you." I put it down in front of him, walking around the kitchen island "Are you coming to Enzo's first race?"
"Huh?" Elio looked up from the envelop in his hands "What?"
I chuckled a little, beginning to slice up some apples, watching him tilting his head a little reminding me of Charles.
"Are you coming to Enzo's first race? I know you're not that into F1 anymore, but I think Enzo wants you there.. it's also your dad's first race as team principal of Ferrari and I know for a fact that he would definitely love to have you there." I smiled at him, and he rubbed his neck, looking nervous "What's going on?"
"Oh umm-it's just… do you remember how I applied for the Parsons School of Design in New York? Studying there would be a dream, although... I mean, chances were little that they even consider me, comparing my photography to those of others? But... mum, they want me.. I'm in..." Elio whispered, and I dropped the knife "I mean... I applied there on a whim, I first need to cheek for scholarships because it's freaking expensive and-..." he began to ramble and I walked back around the island, stopping in front of him.
"I’m so proud of you, Elio. Wow! This is amazing!" I cupped his cheek, kissing it, watching him blush.
"Thanks mum, but it's like I said I have to check if they have scholarsh-…"
"You do know that your dad and I have a little money on the side, right?" I joked and he looked at me "You're going. No scholarship needed. It's noble from you, to think like that, but you don't need it. I'm sure, you would get a scholarship if you would apply for one, but someone might need it more than you..."
"Are you sure? It's expensive? Like really." Elio mumbled, and I laughed.
"Your dad is a 5 time Formula 1 world champion, Ferrari team principal, investor, founder and whatever of god knows what companies, I honestly lost count, and your mum, little old me, also managed to make a little fortune with clever investments and commercial deals and from driving 3 seasons in F1! So yes Elio, l'm sure. And even if not? We could always sell one or two of your dad's cars, I guess that would cover the tuition fees and everything else."
"Who wants to sell my cars for what?" Charles walked in, all sweaty, hair a mess.
"Elio has some big news..." I smiled at our son who nervously grabbed the envelop from the counter.
"Okay? Then shoot..." Charles opened the fridge, grabbing a bottle of water, looking at Elio.
"So umm-... I applied at some universities... and the Parsons School of Design, they have one of the best photography programs worldwide, they accepted me..." Elio said nervously and Charles eyes brightened in an instant.
"The Parsons School of Design in New York? Wow! Elio, I'm so proud of you! Incredible!" he exclaimed, storming over to our son, pulling him into a tight embrace "You worked so hard for this! You deserve this so much, son. I'm really, really proud of you."
"Okay, Mr. Sweaty, can you please take a shower and not smother your sweat all over our son? Thank you!" I pulled Charles away from Elio.
"Hey! I just ran 5 kilometres! Of course I'm sweaty!" he snaked his arm around my waist, pulling me closer "I have to stay in shape for you cara mia..." he then whispered, his warm breath fanning over my skin, eliciting goosebumps all over, before he kissed my jaw.
"Eww! Here are children! Behave for fucks sake!" Enzo walked into the kitchen, fake gagging "Things I don't want to see before breakfast? My parents making out in front of me like horny teenagers!"
"You're just jealous because I landed a pretty girl and you didn’t." Charles laughed, pinching my waist "I'm going to take a shower and tonight we're celebrating you Elio..." he ruffled Elio's hair and was about to leave when he stopped "I still don't know why you want to sell some of my cars?" he looked at me.
"And I don't know why we're celebrating Elio?" Enzo plopped down on the stool next to his brother, eating his cereals "What did you do?"
"You're brother was accepted at the Parsons School of Design..." I said and he made big eyes.
"Are you serious El? Fucking hell, that's one of the best schools! I know that because you talked about it for years now! Congrats little bro!" Enzo side hugged his brother who smiled shyly.
"Thanks, but hey, you're only 3 minutes older, Zo..." Elio rolled his eyes playfully.
"Semantics..." Enzo shrugged his shoulders and I continued cutting the apples.
"Hello? I still want to know why my cars are being sold?"
"It was because of the costs of the school. But don’t worry, I won’t touch your precious cars…" I chuckled and Charles tilted his head, coming closer.
"You could sell them all, just not the F40… that one is special…" he said and I rolled my eyes.
"It’s your favourite car, I know…"
"Yeah, that too… but you bought it for me… so no, that one won’t be sold ever." he whispered and then kissed me, before stepping away "I’m going to take a shower now."
"And I need to wash my eyeballs with bleach…" Enzo mumbled and I saw the mischievous look on Charles face.
"Care to join me under the shower, cara mia?" he said, looking at me challenging.
"Sounds like a good idea. It’s also good for our planet… it saves water…" I put the knife down, grabbed the plate with the apple slices and put it down in front of the twins "Eat your fruits kiddos."
"Let’s go pretty girl, let’s save our planet…" Charles grabbed my hand, pulling me with him.
"One day you have to pay for your children’s therapy!" Enzo shouted after us and we both laughed.
"That’s fine. We can sell a car for that."
Montreal 2047:
"Charles. Round 7 here in Montreal, 2 Ferrari wins, but also 2 Ferrari DNFs. What are your thoughts on the season so far?"
"I think we started out pretty well. The DNFs were unfortunate, but you have to put into account that one was due to a damage after a collision, so I’d say only our DNF in Bahrain, where we had a mechanical issue, is something we need to work on." I answered and knew already what the follow up question would be.
"The collision in Miami you mentioned, was between your driver and your son… how do you handle such a sensitive situation?"
"That’s simple. I don’t. Enzo is not my driver. He has a team principal who talks with him after the races. That’s not my job. My job as his father is to tell him he gave his all and it didn’t work out, the next time it will…"
"But he’s driving for your junior team, I’m sure you have a say as well?"
"No, I don’t. Not my team. Not my place to say something."
"So you don’t think, you should’ve said something to Enzo about his attempt to overtake your driver at a corner that simply isn’t made for that? Which caused your driver to retire from the race? Costing Ferrari precious and well needed points?"
"Again. That’s his team principals job. Not mine. I did my job as his dad and that’s it." I said with finality in my voice, hoping the reporter would understand that he wouldn’t get a different answer from me.
"Thank you, Charles."
I nodded and got out, already seeing Enzo and his group preparing for their press conference. He saw me and rolled his eyes a little and I shrugged my shoulders, walking off towards the Ferrari hospitality where Lizzie sat, going through some timetables and documents
"What a bitch!" her first words and I had to chuckle.
"What did you expect. The Spanish media never liked me… why would they start now." I sat down next to her "What’s all that?"
"That are Mira and Callie’s schedules for the next weeks… who would’ve thought that managing two Formula 1 driver and co-directing the F1 Academy was so difficult." she chuckled and I sighed.
"Yeah well… who would’ve thought that being the team principal of Ferrari would only be my secondary problem and my first one would be my son who’s not even driving for my team…"
"I’m sorry they ask you these kind of questions." Lizzie sat up, cupping my cheek "And I’m sorry that Enzo is a little… well he hates that he’s compared to you all the time, so he’s a little frustrated and you’re the one who…"
"I know. And I’m not even mad at him. I’m sorry for him. But more in a way like… I know what good of a driver he is, I mean… he didn’t win his championships for nothing, but F1 is different. The media is different, the expectations… everything. I just don’t want him to crack under all the pressure." I mumbled and Lizzie rubbed soothing circles on my cheek.
"He’ll manage, you’ll see. He just needs time… and a thick skin." she said and I nodded, right when I saw Enzo picking up his microphone and turned up the volume.
"Julia Andres, ESPN Spain, question for Enzo. Out of the 6 races of this season you already had 3 DNFs, and finished only once in the points. Do you think the criticism from other drivers such as Ward Benton or Paolo Vasquez is justified that you only have a seat in F1 because of your famous father?"
"Well, no it’s not justified, because I’m not just here because of my famous father… also because of my famous mother, who won in 3 Formula 1 seasons more races than Benton and Vasquez have won combined in over 11 seasons together." Enzo answered and some of the journalists laughed. Vasquez on the end of the right side of the sofa only clenched his jaw, glaring at him.
"So you don’t think it’s justified?"
"I worked my ass off to be here. I won every junior championship there is on the first attempt. Did I have it easier than others because I never had to think about the finances and never had to think about if I wouldn’t win the next race a sponsor might drop out and I wouldn’t have the money to continue? Yes. I know how privileged I am. I know that the chance that I have to race now in F1 is huge and I have to step up my game to prove that I deserve it. I know that better than anyone else. But to say I’m only here because of my famous last name? No. Not justified. Because right now my last name is more a curse than a blessing… everyone looks at my races, sees my name and asks themselves and that’s the son of Charles Leclerc and Lizzie Doetterer? So yeah… I know that my results aren’t promising, but I’m working hard on turning my season around…"
"Thank you Enzo…"
He smiled but I knew him better than anyone, I saw how defeated and frustrated he was, his shoulders tense.
"I want to go in there and hit them. All of them…" Lizzie was seething, seeing the pain in Enzo’s eyes.
"He handled that pretty well, better than I would have to be honest." I smiled a little and she nodded.
"Still. These kind of questions are unfair… and Benton and Vasquez? I want to hit them too…"
"It’s okay mama bear. I want to hit them too. Or run them over…" I joked and she chuckled a little, then threw all of her stuff into her bag "And now you’re leaving me to look after him… fair enough…" I got up.
"Mama bear has to look for her cub, no?" she laughed and kissed my cheek when she spotted something behind me and I turned around.
Between our motorhome and the Mercedes one all the drivers from the press conference and some more were standing huddled together, Enzo, Benton, Vasquez in the middle, looking at each other like they would kill one other any minute. I walked towards the exit and opened the door, but stopped when I heard the dispute.
"Just admit it, without your famous Dad, you wouldn’t even be here." Benton rolled his eyes.
"Yeah just that he’s a failed mini Leclerc, right?" Vasquez sneered.
"Mini Leclerc-Doetterer… and at least I’m having my parents last name, they weren’t ashamed of me… can’t say that about you and your old man, never once world champion Carlos Sainz jr." Enzo smiled, everyone now staring at Vasquez "Oh right. I forgot. No one knew who your daddy was… well oops… now they know. Now they all know how you made it to F1… because let’s face it, without your dad and his influence in Williams, you wouldn’t be here… you didn’t even drive in any junior series. Straight from karting to F3 and then without a title nothing into F1. Where you drive now for 4 seasons, and only won one race because of a penalty and two disqualifications."
"I swear to god, Leclerc, shut the fuck up or…" Vasquez began when I cleared my throat, making all the drivers flinch.
"Charles." Marco, one of my drivers said and I looked at him "They were just about to go to our teams."
"Yeah… right." Benton said, pulling Vasquez with him, who glared at me.
"Tell your dad I said hi." I shouted after him and then turned around, only Enzo left, Lizzie behind me looking at him.
"Enzo Leclerc! Do you have anything to say?" she sounded mad, but there was something else in her voice, and if I wasn’t mistaken it sounded a little like pride.
"I’m sick of them asking me the same questions again and again! I’m sick of everyone saying I’m only here because of you!" he said looking at us but I shook my head.
"You can’t listen to that, Enzo. You have to ignore it. They will use that against you again and again."
"I know, okay? But it sucks still." he mumbled and Lizzie walked towards him.
"I know Enzo, believe me when I arrived in F1 I had to go through the same… but just because they have this opinion of you, doesn’t mean that they’re right, okay? Do the talking on track. That’s what I did. And your dad as well… just don’t give a fuck about them."
"Hey!" I pinched her side and she laughed "No curse words!"
"Whatever." she rolled her eyes.
"What I’m saying is, you made it this far because of your talent. You’re a damn good driver and it’s time that you finally see that yourself, don’t give a fuck about others, and just focus on yourself. Your race. Your team. You. Don’t listen to anything else." Lizzie nudges his shoulder and I nodded.
"Your mum is right. Always when I had a shitty season and I was too much in my head everything got worse, but the moment I stopped caring about others and started focusing on myself, it was always like the penny dropped and I was able to turn the season around."
"You know how uncle Danny always said fuck 'em all? Well… that’s the kind of attitude you need now… but please stay within the rules…" Lizzie chuckled and Enzo nodded.
"Alright… you’re right. I have to focus on myself." he said and hugged Lizzie, then me "I’m sorry dad, but Marco and Lucas won’t win this weekend. It’s my turn…" he winked once and then walked off.
"Well, I guess you have to talk to your drivers…" Lizzie said and I cocked an eyebrow "They have to watch out for Enzo. If he’s like you? He’s a menace and will force them into making mistakes that he will use to overtake…"
"That was more your field of expertise…"
"Congrats Zo! Damn what a race! Emmie and I woke up the entire hotel." Elio said and Emmie next to him nodded.
"You really kicked some asses today. I’m proud little bro. Seriously. The face of Vasquez and Benton? Priceless. I swear. I can’t wait to talk about it in my next podcast. You should be one of my guests!" Emmie said excitedly and Enzo smiled from ear to ear.
"If I can say whatever I want to? Yes. No PR trained answers. Just what I have to say…"
"Enzo…" Lizzie mumbled and I laughed.
"Maybe tone it down a little, you still have to race for a while with these guys…" I said and Enzo shrugged his shoulders a little.
"How’s New York? The campus? Tell me everything!" he asked and Elio and Emmie began to describe every single detail of their trip.
I looked at Lizzie, how she smiled at our kids, squeezed into Enzo’s side so she could see Emmie and Elio on the screen. She looked up and tilted her head a little and I nodded towards the door and got off the sofa, Lizzie following me.
"What’s up?" she asked and I grabbed her by the waist, kissing her "As much as I like that, something is going on in here…" she tapped at my forehead with her fingers and I smiled.
"Marco will retire at the end of this season…" I began and her eyes widened "John wants Enzo, but only if he proves himself… today was… today was amazing, but he needs more weekends like this."
"And you doubt that he will have them?"
"No! God, cara mia!" I said immediately, shaking my head "I just don’t want to put him under too much pressure. You know? But I also want him to race every weekend like today. If he continues like this? He’ll be driving for us next season."
"You won’t tell him, right?" Lizzie asked and I shook my head.
"I wasn’t even allowed to tell you… but we have no secrets so…"
"Don’t worry, I won’t tell him. He will do just fine, you’ll see. He doesn’t need our help. Not anymore. And if so, he knows he can always come to us…"
"You’re right. He’ll manage." I kissed her cheek and looked at the sofa, where Enzo was telling Elio and Emmie everything about his final overtake of Marco.
He would make it. He would prove that he deserves a seat at Ferrari. He would do just great.
Summer 2048:
"Here, cara mia." Charles handed me a glass of wine and sat down next to me "What are you thinking about?"
"Oh nothing…" I said quietly, but he pinched my side.
"We’re married for almost 23 years, together for more than 25 years, I know you for over 40 years… I know when something is going on in there… so spill the beans…" he pulled me into him, kissing my temple.
"It’s just… Charles we’re 50… our kids are successful young adults. Emmie’s podcast is in the top 10 of the most influential Formula 1 podcasts, one of Elio’s photographs was used in the newest National Geographic magazine and Enzo just won his first race in Formula 1… isn’t it crazy?" I said and Charles was quiet for a while, before he chuckled "What?"
"It’s crazy… you’re right. But it’s wonderfully crazy, don’t you think? Our kids are truly amazing, they go their own way, are their own people, but never forget where they’re coming from…" he said and I nodded.
"Who would’ve thought that this would be our life one day…"
"Me. From the moment I realised that I was in love with you. This was what I was hoping for. You and me. 3 kids. A wonderful house you made into our home. That was the life I was dreaming of…" he whispered and I turned a little, looking at him "I told you before that from the moment I met you, you were intertwined in my brain, my thoughts, my mind, every fibre of my body. You were it for me. I know I took a stupid detour, but at the end of the day it was just that, a detour, just a stupid bump in the road to my destiny. You."
"I always loved how you were able to say things like that out of nowhere…" I smiled at him and he chuckled.
"You’re the biggest inspiration there is." he cupped my cheeks and kissed me, time stopped and for a moment it felt like our very first kiss all those years ago in Miami, after I crashed out, after Charles confessed his feelings for me. I opened my eyes and looked at him. The little freckles on his skin, the gold speckles in his eyes. The boyish smile with his gorgeous dimples. For a moment it all came back and I saw the young boy I fell in love with all those years ago before my eyes.
"I love you, Charles Leclerc."
"I love you, Lizzie Doetterer-Leclerc."
"It’s you and me. Against the world…"
"…always."
The End ♥️
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And that’s it. Again, thank you all for reading. It’s been one hell of a ride. ♥️
(Also, congrats Charles on WINNING Monza!!!)
Please leave a comment/ like/ reblog/ message and tell me how you liked it! I'm dying to hear your thoughts!
Last but not least, English is not my first language and although I tried my best: please excuse any mistakes I made!
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