#losty is plagued by crippling self doubt and lack of feedback makes it worse

[1lostsoul0fishbowl]

my latest fic has 90 hits, which is pretty good considering i’m an unpopular writer and the pairing is an unpopular rarepair. the problem is that it only has 6 kudos and i’m sad and slightly insane about the fact that 84 people silently “consumed” my story but couldn’t or wouldn’t take an extra second to click a tiny kudos heart to tell me hey i liked this. did they not like it? did they hate it? did they think it was stupid? or did 84 people click on it by mistake? that’s a lot of people.

it’s really killing my desire to share any more writing. or even to write any more. i feel like i’m standing in front of a bakery offering free samples of a cake i worked really hard on, a cake i am proud of enough to want to share it. and i’m watching people take the cake and eat it, but they don’t say “mmm delicious” or smile or even look at me. they eat it silently and walk away. what’s the point in sharing if nobody’s going to say anything? i can just watch my fics like little movies in my head and enjoy them myself without even needing to write them down.