#look the math major was... fine. he's cute and i don't not want to date him

[allroseshave-their-pricks]

bumble stop showing me people I know irl challenge

[bullshit-bulltrue]

Hawk Talk

Okay so sorry if this is a little jumpy I'm having a so far two-day long anxiety attack anyway-

We got assigned seating in history and i got sat next to the biggest cunt wad i have ever met i fucking despise her and she's my desk partner

she was cordial and so was i but she has not fucking changed at all

And the cute boy from years ago is still cute and shy and such a sweetheart but he sits behind me ish and to the very far right

So I can't even look at him anymore without anyone noticing :(

And nyxie darling (@whennyxfallsinlove) was right, i was looking at him like a deer staring at headlights the first day because holy shit i REALLY *REALLY* liked him (still do) because he was one of the only genuine boys I met at the time and I was having a really difficult time and yk hanging out with him helped me out since things were happening in my home life that were difficult to say the least

So then the rest of class went smoothly

For math, there is no cute guys

But thats fine because I really like my teacher and he's taught ways to do math that are so much easier

Not only is he funny, but he also REALLY goes into depth of equations and helps out a lot!!

Sooo yeah

I had a mini heart attack bc after I left class I thought my phone fell outta my pocket but the pockets on my jeans are high (since the jeans are high-waisted duh) so it turns out my butt just didn't recognize the feeling since majority of my jeans don't have wider pocket space

But yeah

Anddd then I went to English class

And if you saw the recent small Hawk Talk posts of me interacting with nyxie, you'd know that there are two boys that are lowkey cute 👀

Idk they're cute by my standards but probably not everyone else's lmao

So I feel like I should call these guys smth??

So umm let's call one of them Baseball guy bc he likes baseball and I also didn't wanna ask his name but when I do, I'll probably make a nickname to refer to when I post about him

And the other we'll call D/Dee ig??

So yeah D was funny as usual

And the baseball guy talked more and lanie, him, and I were going through this box

It was a worry box and my English teacher (we'll call her Mrs. K) basically had a chest and put it at our table to write our worries on an index card and put it in there (anonymously, but some kids put their names so now we have Blackmail™️ . Probs won't need it, but it's good to have information on people)

And like she said that we could NOT under ANY circumstances go through it..

But we did 😘

So yeah that was fun because I didnt get caught

so i'm her favorite student while also being a little shit

🙃

So me and Lanie started following Cute Baseball Boy™️ to his locker because we're nosy bitches

But then I lost lanie so I sat on the floor until i was found like a 7-year-old who lost her mom at the supermarket

Aaand then we had lunch together !!

But then I found out she thought baseball guy is cute too :(

And idk how to feel about that

So I'd anything happens between them I'm gonna be kinda bummed bc I don't want her to get the wrong idea about me thinking he's cute

So im gonna have to find a way to not like him ig??

Or just keep shit to myself (with the intention of telling y'all every little detail)

Gonna je bummed if they start dating or smth but I'll be supportive nonetheless because they're both my friends and if they're happy then that's all that really matters to me

So anyway

Thus guy across from us at lunch was fucking hilarious

His friend kept putting a plate of school food someone forgot to throw away in his face and he let out the most high pitch ear piercing scream I have EVER heard lmaooo

Same bro, same

Felt that

And like I looked at him like wtf was that dude

And his eyes got SO wide

He kept frantically pointing to the girls that were sitting near him and even his friend 💀

So like that was funny

And then we got to gym !!

We didn't get to actually do anything :(

Basically what happened in PE: got gym clothes, got gym lockers (mine and lanie's are next to each other!!), and watched boys get play basketball (D was playing and he wasn't that bad)

Sooo yeah

Ik I said that I went basic white girl mode and watched the boys play

But like half the time I was just taking selfies on snap and scrolling through tumblr memes lmao

But the other half me and lanie were laughing at the boys clothes and haircuts bc they look like they rolled out of bed and asked a 5 year old to make their hair the shape of a fucking broccoli spout or whatever tf you call it

y'all it was that bad

(we also laughed abt that shit at lunch too)

Oh forgot something

While we were all going into the girl's locker room of the gym i thought lanie was right behind me but when i turned around i had to tilt my head up and look around for her head because she's way taller than me and she was at the very back of the crowd

So i went to the side and waited for her to get close to me

And she literally fucking said

L: damn girl i keep losing you, you're really speedy

Me: yeah i'm short but it means i walker faster than you, you're a fucking giant

L: well yeah to YOU. but like i'm tall enough to be your mom

And I lost it. I laughed so hard bc of the way she said it lol

Soo yeah that was the end of my school day

Hope you enjoyed <3

Oh and tagging people that wanted to hear about my day and/or have been reading my Hawk Talk posts (if you dont wanna be tagged lmk and i wont anymore, and lmk if u do wanna be tagged in the full day hawk talk posts!) : @cereal-is-a-soup100percent-true @whennyxfallsinlove @dizzeners @cau-lee-flower215 @sp1rit-realm

[minisugakoobies]

Which imaginary friend from your childhood would you rather reappear in your life: Jin with his dad jokes that made you the weird kid with old man humor or Hobi whose positive attitude seriously fucks ruins your day?

Forgive me, my imagination kinda got away from me on this one.

**********

"...and that's why I switched majors to applied mathematics." He paused, taking a long dram from his IPA. "My goal is to eventually obtain a job as an actuary."

You nodded, eyes glazing over a bit as you stared at your date. He was pretty cute, pretty nice, and pretty boring. He'd been droning on about his decision to change his major from one type of math to another for going on ten minutes now.

Sensing a break, you piped up. "That's actuarially interesting!"

Blank stare.

Tough crowd.

You tried again. "Hey, do you know why they don't serve beer at math parties?"

He shook his head.

"Because you can't drink and derive!"

Silence. He set his empty beer bottle down and glanced at his watch. “Oh geez, look at the time. I almost forgot that I have a study session in the morning. I should probably get going."

And just like that, you latest in the line of totally unsuccessful dates was over. At least this one made it all the way to 9 pm before he bailed on you.

Sighing, you threw your purse on the sink in the restroom, staring into the mirror. What was wrong with you? You had to be the problem, right? The only common denominator - pun not intended this time - for these failed dates was you. You closed your eyes in frustration. Maybe you should give up on these dating apps.

“Or maybe you need someone to help you pick better dates.”

You snapped your head up, startled. Hadn’t the restroom been empty when you’d come in?

A handsome man was grinning at you in the mirror. Tall, blond hair, dark eyes and a blinding smile.

What the fuck? It couldn’t be…

“It is,” he confirmed, reading your thoughts. “Hiya, kiddo. Long time no see.”

“Jin?!” you shouted at your childhood imaginary friend’s reflection, whirling around to find him leaning against a stall door. “But you… you’re not…” Anger bubbled up. “This is all your fault!”

Whatever reaction he’d been expecting, that clearly wasn’t it. “Huh?” he blinked furiously, flabbergasted. “My fault??”

“Yes! All those stupid dad jokes you told me as a kid completely warped my brain! I can’t stop chasing dates away because I can’t stop cracking dumb jokes!”

Jin just shook his head, stepping forward to place his large hands on your shoulders. “Have you ever thought for a moment that you’re perfectly fine and THEY are the problem?” He smiled. “You’ve got a wonderful sense of humor! You just need to find someone who appreciates it.”

“And how am I supposed to do that?”

“With my help, of course.”

You cocked your head. “You want to be my wingman?”

He nodded. You considered.

“…what the hell. Can’t do any worse than I already am!”

“That’s the spirit.” He slung an arm over your shoulders as you left the restroom. “Let’s work on your pickup lines. Have you tried the one about tuna, a piano, and a pot of glue?”