#lol yet another writing prompt we could totally write a whole novel on

[justlookatthosesausages]

Lol that actually gave me an idea, a time travel prompt with Anna and Elsa witnessing the day the spirits cut off the enchanted forest and see their parents before their lives changed forever.

Oh my, the FEELS. This is going to be so much fun to write dundundunnn 

=======

Elsa blinked, looking around. That flash had blinded her a bit, and when she looked around for her sister to make sure she was still near and safe, she saw by her flickering eyes that she was as startled as her.

“Uhm… What the heck just happened?” Asked Anna.

Before the blonde made any speculations, she frowned and scolded her sister. 

“I told you to not touch that rock.”

“But it was shiny!” Complained Anna, and she had a sorry pout. Her curiosity had led them in a weird situation... And it wasn’t the first time it did. 

Elsa sighed, then looked around as she thought. “I know those woods by heart now. I’ve never seen this rock before. And it was emanating a big amount of magic.”

“It was glowing a lot. I can easily imagine it was.” Nodded Anna.

The Snow Queen tried to understand what happened. Her younger had bent to pick up the rock, and then suddenly a flash covered them, but… Nothing seemed to have changed. The woods around them looked the same, and they were still standing at the same place. 

Elsa’s eyes narrowed when she then noticed something. 

“Wasn’t that tree… Way bigger when we passed by it?”

Anna turned at her gesture, and nodded. “Yep.”

The redhead then pointed at the sky. “The clouds also completely changed, for some reason.” 

Elsa lifted her hand and didn’t notice much difference, yet trusted her. She hadn’t paid attention to the sky, and on that, she congratulated her sister for her sense of observation. Anna also knew the name of the different types of clouds. Even if that knowledge came from years of boredom due to the isolation, it still was impressive. She nodded. 

“Yeah. The clouds are different. It’s weird. Did… Time pass? Did we faint?”

Anna held her chin as she thought. “I don’t remember falling down. I was getting up when the flash happened, so it’s not that. Also, the sun still has the same position, no?”

“It does. You’re right.”

The Queen smiled. “Look, I’m sorry for touching that magic rock. But we’re both safe, so maybe we should go back to the camp and ask if they saw something different.”

Elsa agreed with her decision. They walked back to the Sami camp from where they had taken a walk, and the Fifth Spirit heard a tinkling between the trees on their right. She also felt in the air that it was Gale, and she smiled. 

“Maybe we could ask Gale if they noticed something.”

They walked to the Spirit.

“Oh, they’re playing with a kid.” Said Anna.

The sisters now were a hundred meters away from them, but they still hadn’t noticed their presence. The Wind Spirit and the child, apparently a girl, were too busy having fun to do so. 

“Wait… I’ve seen that face somewhere.” Frowned Anna, bending her head in confusion. “Is she one of the Northuldra kids?”

She tried to remember where she saw that child’s face before, and as she was playing with Gale and moving around in flips, it was hard to look at her face. 

Then it suddenly hit her. And apparently, it hit Elsa at the same time. They instantly stopped walking.

“It’s Mother.” They both exhaled at the same time, and gasped in disbelief. 

There was no doubt. She looked exactly like the ice statues of her they had seen again and again in Ahtohallan on their regular visits. 

“Elsa, it’s…” Started Anna, a smile stretching her lips. 

She was about to say ‘miraculous’, but her elder ended the sentence in another way. 

“…Impossible.” 

They turned to each other, and exchanged a glance. 

“What do you mean?”

“How… How is she here? It can’t be.” Now whispered Elsa, to make sure that Iduna wasn’t hearing them. She also made sure that her magic was low, keeping a full control on it, to not warn Gale of her presence. 

“It can’t be? Come on, you were born with magic. Anything is possible. Look! It’s amazing!”

She pointed at their mother, for now only a teen, and she was giggling in the distance with a melodious Wind Spirit who also shared her joy. 

“How are we here then?”

“Well, we probably time traveled.”

“Time travel doesn’t exist, Anna! We’re not in one of your fantasy novels!” Blinked Elsa with a frown, trying to keep things logical and facts-based. 

Anna shook her head with an eye-roll. “You’re able to see memories of the past, but this surprises you?”

She walked forward. “Come on, I’m done whispering. It’s Mama right there, I’ve always dreamed of this moment! We can talk to her!”

“No, no no no.” Forbid Elsa, placing her arm in front of her younger sister. 

“What? Why?”

The Snow Queen couldn’t believe she was asking that question.

“Have you never read time traveling novels??” Grumbled Elsa. 

“You just said earlier that I did. Of course I did. You’re contradicting yourself now.” Mocked Anna, even if she knew that it was rhetorical.  

“Then you must remember that in every story, when the hero interacts with past events, it alters the future.”

“Yeah, in stories.” Underlined the Queen. 

“No, you don’t get it! In life too! - I can’t believe I’m stating this, but…” Interrupted herself Elsa. “…Anna, we can’t talk to our mother right now. We just can’t. We shouldn’t. Otherwise, everything will change in the future. In our future. Maybe… Maybe even none of us will be born.”

Anna considered each of her words, taking the news in. She was right… But not completely. 

“…Then why are we here?”

“Because you touched a magic rock!” Reminded Elsa.

“No, I mean… Why are we here, alive? If changing the past changes the future, our present time, then we can’t exist in our version, right?”

The blonde opened her mouth to reply, then closed it. Then opened it again, then closed it again. “Oh.”

“Is it a time paradox?” Understood Anna.

“It totally is a time paradox.” Sighed Elsa, closing her eyes. 

“Don’t go dramatic. It’s good news. It means that we can intervene!”

“No, it doesn’t really work that way…” Started Elsa.

Suddenly, it was like the air snapped. Something completely changed. In one second, the whole situation flipped. 

Elsa’s head quickly turned when she heard the familiar - too familiar - sound of steel from swords getting drawn.

“Oh no.”

“What?!” Worried Anna, who also felt that something was happening, but couldn’t tell what yet.

Gale had stopped playing with Iduna, who got dropped on her feet to the ground, and left behind by the Wind Spirit who hurried away. Some yells and grunts were heard in the distance, but it was too far to see what it was.

“It’s today.” Muttered Elsa, her eyes filling with tears. Sad, panicked and powerless tears.

The Queen frowned, then gasped when she understood. Iduna frowned in confusion at why the Spirit had left her, and heard the noises from afar, so she followed them. 

“No, she shouldn’t go where the fight is!” Exclaimed Anna, way too loud.

Iduna jolted at her voice, closer than the noises she heard before, and quickly turned to where the sisters where standing. Elsa gasped and strongly grabbed Anna to drag her behind a thick tree. Thankfully, they were far enough for their young mother to not spot them. 

“Elsa! What are you– hm-hmmm!” Got muffled Anna, Elsa slamming a hand on her mouth. 

“Shhh!” Warned the blonde, her eyes wide. 

She peeked behind the tree to see if Iduna had walked closer, and the girl still was searching where the voice had come from. 

“E-hah!” Tried to say Anna, her mouth still under Elsa’s hand. 

Her elder gestured her to stay silent with a finger on her own lips. 

“E-HAH!” Insisted Anna, gesturing at the hand Elsa had on her face, and trying to get free of her hold. 

“SHHHH! Will you shush up? You’re going to get us caught!” Whispered Elsa on the lowest tone possible despite her panic and anger. 

She looked at Iduna, but thankfully, though for the worst, she got distracted by the growing sounds of battle and ran to go help. 

After making sure that their mother had ran away and they were alone in that corner of the woods again, she let go of Anna’s mouth. The later gasped of relief as she did so, panting. 

“What is wrong with you?” Frowned Elsa. “She almost saw us! Why were you wriggling like that?!”

The redhead intensely rubbed her cheeks and mouth with her hands, trying to heat them. 

“Your hand was SUPER COLD!” 

Elsa’s eyes widened at the sudden realization. 

“Oh my goodness!! I didn’t notice, I… I was so stressed that I made magic in my palms, and… Oh Anna, I’m so sorry!!”

She hurried to check her state. 

“I’m alright.” Assured Anna, still rubbing her face however. “This just feels like I plunged my head into the fjord. This is fine.”

Elsa had a worried and sorry eyebrows expression, and clenched her fists to take all magic off her hands. She then rubbed them along her younger sister’s arms, apologizing in loops. 

This made Anna laugh, but her laughter stopped when they heard the fight between the Northuldra and the Arendelle soldiers getting closer. 

They looked at the fight that was playing a crucial part in their common past.

“Come on, we have to hide.” Advised Elsa, showing bushes a bit further. “We’ll wait here for now, and then cross the mist on the other way once it’s formed. We’ll just have to hold hands and it will part.”

“Wait, you want us to leave?!” Blurted Anna, eyes growing wide. 

“We should. The forest stayed this way for more than 30 years, and we can’t change the course of events by hiding inside… What do you think?” Elsa inquired, trying to build a plan. 

The redhead wasn’t responding, her eyes still wide and staring at the fight. She had just spotted their parents in the battle now arriving close. She also recognized the Arendelle soldiers in younger versions of themselves, and some Northuldra people as well. 

But she gulped when she saw how events turned.

Mattias was struggling to protect Agnarr. Even if she knew that he would make it, according to the future, she couldn’t help but worry. And Iduna looked panicked, frantically looking around and confused at why the Arendelle soldiers suddenly attacked. 

That was too much for Anna. Her natural and legendary impatience forced her body to move. She turned and already launched herself for a sprint. 

“NO, ANNA!” Muttered Elsa, her voice strong but wheezing to keep it as low as a whisper. 

Anna got restrained by a hand holding hers firmly, and her whole body stopped in one jerk at Elsa’s force. She almost lost her balance, surprised by her sister’s strength. 

“What are you DOING?” The Queen said through gritted teeth as she twirled around. 

“Preventing you from doing a big mistake.”

“But we can HELP! We can save them!”

“NO, we CAN’T!” Insisted Elsa. “Imagine what would happen if–”

“If we change the future? Yes, I got it. But if we’re alive, it means that we made it. Nothing changed.”

Elsa shook her head. “No. Nothing changed because we stayed here and did nothing. Nothing changed because we will do nothing.” She clarified. 

Anna looked at her, and there was a long silence between them as they stared at each other. Only the distant sound of battle punctuated it. Elsa sighed with a shaking breath.

“Anna, you have no idea how much I want to change the past too. When I saw Mama, I just wanted to run to her and take care of her. But…” 

The redhead had thought that Elsa was getting bossy and a killjoy, but her eyes now were filling with genuine tears.

“…We can’t. I’m sorry.”

Another silence filled the space between them.

“Don’t. Don’t be sorry. It’s not your fault. I’m actually sorry myself for pushing you.” Murmured the Queen. 

She turned to the battle, a sad yet decisive expression on her face. 

“Okay, where’s your hiding spot?”

Elsa smiled at Anna’s choice of vocabulary to light up their mood. 

“Over there. Nobody will see us.”

They crouched on the grass, Elsa in lotus position and Anna sitting with her legs bent and her chin on her knees. 

“And now we wait?”

“And now we wait.” Nodded Elsa.

[homespork-review]

Homespork Act 2: The Racism of the Conductor’s Baton (Part 3)

BRIGHT: Also, the prompts in John’s head are back and are making increasingly strident demands. Namely, they want John to follow Nannasprite to the cookies. John isn’t too keen on this idea. He’s so not-keen on it that he fails to notice Rose whacking him in the head with a box. Frustrated by his lack of compliance, the voice devolves into insults. I’m not sure why the Wayward Vagabond is so insistent on this? It’s not like he can eat the cookies.

On the whole this is a really good sequence, I think. It lays out some basic background information for the reader and John, and it’s paced pretty well.

Back in the future, an agitated slip of the finger causes a cupboard door to open in the Wayward Vagabond’s hideout. Out fall a few tins of food and a heavy tome of HUMAN ETIQUETTE.

Rose has updated her GameFAQs walkthrough with the new information from Nannasprite. We’re getting something of a motif here: Cut-aways to the Wayward Vagabond are followed by a walkthrough update. It’s a nice little pattern.

Rose also speculates on the prototyping process and on why the prototypings of other players worldwide have not affected John’s foes, and comes to the conclusion that each client/server pair -- or daisy chain -- spawns its own copy of the Incipisphere, or ‘session’. She’s also caught up in rewriting her work. Couldn’t the reader go somewhere else? Or somewhen else?

Why yes, the reader can. Namely the reader can jump back to Rose’s birthday, where she’s having a conversation with GG.

This conversation reinforces that there’s something funny about GG. She asks about John’s present the moment Rose opens it, and Rose isn’t surprised by this. GG also knows without being told that Rose’s dead pet is a male cat, and she’s been working on her birthday present for John for years.

Finally, she asks what Rose would say if GG told her she knew a game that could bring said cat back to life.

TT: If someone told me that, I would regard the remark with a great deal of skepticism. TT: If that someone was you, on the other hand, then I would have to ask preemptively: TT: Is that someone you? GG: yes that someone is me!!!!!!!! GG: i just thought you might find it interesting TT: So what is this game?

Whatever strange abilities GG has, Rose is familiar with her knowing things she shouldn’t, and trusts her even when she makes claims that sound impossible.

CHEL: Note, also, that here GG is the one who brings up the game, while in an early convo with John set chronologically after this one she asked “lol! whats sburb?” This is not an inconsistency. Again, it comes up later. We end up saying that a lot. Sorry.

BRIGHT: Also: Rose knows John well enough to guess that he was wearing a disguise when he talked to her earlier -- but still interprets his gift of knitting needles and yarn as a subtle jab at her habit of making analytical comments, much as her mother. GG points out that he probably didn’t mean it that way. Later, Rose says she’ll make him a gift with strong sentimental value as a dig at him, but admits she doesn’t really mean it that way when GG points it out. Then again, this takes place some months before the comic starts, and may show how Rose and John’s relationship has evolved.

Back in Dave’s home, the sun is beating down. Meteors pepper the city, and smoke is rising. Dave captchalogues his katana, and sets out in search of his brother’s copy of the game.

Dave elaborates a little on the concept of irony that he and his brother live by. His brother is awesome, apparently. Dave can only hope to one day reach those heights of irony.

The puppet theme from earlier continues, with puppets strewn around the living room where Bro lives and sleeps. Among them are a Mr. T puppet, which is wearing a leather thong and handcuffed to a pantsless Chuck Norris puppet. What makes it a little disturbing is that this is just lying out in the living room, which Dave presumably goes into all the time. Dave’s narration here sounds a lot like he’s trying to convince himself that these things are totally cool, no, really. He can’t see Lil Cal anywhere, though...

CHEL: Other puppets are the iconic Smuppets, possibly a portmanteau of “smutty puppets”, vaguely humanoid nude puppets with enormous behinds and phallic noses. There are implications that they are intended for non-PG purposes. Further implications are that the leaving of obscene material around the home has been going on for all of Dave’s life. For the record, intentionally showing pornography or sexual aids to children is classed as a form of sexual abuse. Casually leaving them lying around the house in front of kids long-term, well, the motive may not be malicious but I doubt a jury would care. It certainly counts as neglect. The popular fanfic Brainbent explored the damage this kind of thing could inflict on a kid in a realistic setting.

Also note, there is no hint of Dave having or ever having had parents, not even a photo in the background or something. The immediate assumption would most likely be that they’re dead, but Bro’s strangeness might also suggest estrangement - behaviour like that would probably result in one’s parents not talking to one anymore, though they most likely wouldn’t leave a child in a place like that if they were around. We find out the truth later, and it’s even weirder.

BRIGHT: Between one panel and the next, Lil Cal appears atop a speaker box. Dave is fine with this. Totally fine.

CHEL: For the record, this is Lil Cal:

Not something one would be very happy about finding behind one, is he?

BRIGHT: He plays a bit on the Xbox, gives Cal a fistbump, and then checks out his brother’s computer. It’s password-protected, but Dave knows the password, and Bro knows he knows it, and Dave knows this, and it’s all totally cool.

One of Bro’s websites is a puppet pornography website. Apparently this is popular enough to bring in thousands of dollars a month, and Smuppets are a multi-billion-dollar-per-year enterprise. Time for our next point:

Magic-onomics - wherein characters’ funds issue from nowhere Half-baked attempts to justify a protagonist’s mystery money can also backfire. Explanations should amount to more than “Somehow Rain had lots of money.” Giving Rain an inheritance, or explaining that she recently gave up her job at a top law firm to pursue her art, will work only where these things feel like part of the world of the novel.

Bro and Dave live in a crappy apartment in which Bro doesn’t even have his own bedroom, instead sleeping on the futon in the living room where he works. Yet they have the funds to spend on swords (not cheap) and expensive turntables. The Con Air bunny prop Dave bought for John sold in real life for almost $1,300.

And how the heck do smuppets bring in multiple billions of dollars a year? That’s a niche market, even if Bro is the only supplier. (Which he wouldn’t be — if it’s worth that much, someone else would want in on the market.)

CHEL: Even if said market is fairly disturbing. If there’s enough people who like it enough to buy it, there’ll be people comfortable with supplying it.

BRIGHT: Their income shouldn’t be anywhere near that high, even with puppet pornography adding to the revenue stream. If we grant that in this universe it is that high, then they should be living somewhere more comfortable.

HOW NOT TO WRITE A WEBCOMIC: 13

CHEL: In order for this to actually work as stated, not only would the puppets have to appeal to everyone on the planet, but there would probably have to be a lot more people on the planet than there actually are. I’m pretty sure it’s an exaggeration for humour, but considering the inconsistencies with their income status as presented, it’s still a bit shaky.

It’s also worth another count, because this is basically a handwave to mean the characters presented aesthetically as poor are still as financially secure as is necessary for writing the scenes Hussie wants to:

WHITE SBURB POSTMODERNISM: 6

If the comic was presented as a non-serious cartoon for the whole story, this would pass without comment, but when one’s trying to be dramatic and include real stakes, I think one needs to apply real stakes to everyday things too.

BRIGHT: Then again, it’s possible that their financial status is higher than the apartment would suggest, and Bro just chooses to spend his money on katanas and expensive equipment rather than upgrading. (And/or is lying to Dave about their income.) That might not be out of character given what we see of him later. But overall, this is a mess.

FAILURE ARTIST: Maybe the Smuppets is a money laundering business.

CHEL: A lot of people would read that fanfic.

The theory that the guardians knew the game was coming might explain why he chose to spend so much on swords, at least. He’d know Dave would need them. Not so much of an explanation for everything else though. Considering the weirdness that’s going on, I could imagine Bro not wanting attention drawn to it, but wouldn’t hiding weirdness be much harder in a flat than in a house set off some distance from neighbours?

For that matter, where’s John getting the money for movie memorabilia? Later reveals show the Egbert family originally came from money but they don’t seem to have that much to throw around now.

BRIGHT: Remember how Rose said earlier that she quite enjoyed Bro’s websites? I think that counts as a point for CALL CPA PLEASE…

FAILURE ARTIST: I question how pornographic the site really is. It might just literally be puppets being mashed together with no human body parts. A thirteen year old can surely see that.

BRIGHT: Fair point -- the page we see is teen-safe, at any rate.

CHEL: If it isn’t actually sexual, that possibly makes the supposed popularity level even sillier. Fetishists need constant fresh material and there are probably people who don’t have a specific puppet fetish who would ignore the puppets to look at the guy, but to keep up that level of popularity the viewers who don’t have a puppet fetish would have to keep finding it funny long after most people would think the joke had worn off. Both options say disturbing things about the world this comic is set in and their tastes in either pornography or humour. At least Veronica Chaos appears onscreen with her puppet… (Link contains no porn but you probably don’t want it on a work computer.)

For the record, I think Smuppets would actually make pretty bad sex toys. Plush is a porous material, so it would be hard to clean sticky substances out of it properly, and the phallic noses seem to be too floppy to use for penetration of a human orifice. Maybe that first point is why he brings in so much cash - the smuppets are single-use? People do use plush toys for masturbatory purposes, but usually when they can’t find anything else to use, specific fetishes for them being rare, and generally don’t use the soft parts as penetration toys.

Personally, I quite like the theory the kinkmeme brought up years ago; PlushRumps is actually an elaborate multimedia webcomic a la Homestuck itself. Now that I can see bringing in that much cash. Or possibly it just looks like this, which was made by the guy who wrote Thirty Hs (warning for eye injury and surreality): "Jumping!" (Watch on YouTube)

I could see Bro being that dude.

BRIGHT: And Dave admits, again, that he finds the puppet thing unsettling.

This is a pretty good depiction of someone trying to convince himself to be okay with something that freaks him out. He pesters John to distract himself from the puppets everywhere, and when he doesn’t get a response, he pesters Rose. And Hussie once again repeats the entire blinking pesterlog we read fifty pages ago instead of just linking back to it.

GET ON WITH IT!: 6

CHEL: Just occurred to me; why is Dave so bothered by the puppets? I can’t imagine that Bro suddenly started leaving them around when he hadn’t before - in fact, I believe a later flashback shows infant Dave using a Smuppet’s nose as a pacifier (eww, god I hope it was a freshly-made unused one). Dave really ought to be used to the things by now. Then again, now he’s reaching his teens, he’s probably old enough to start realising this is weird and creepy on a deeper level. But then that brings up the same problem we had with John; doesn’t he have any local friends he could have learned this from sooner? Though I could picture Bro not bothering to send him to school, and we do later learn there is quite possibly magic afoot in hiding the oddness of the Strider household. That’s a complicated theory and requires much more setup than we have here, though, so pin in that for later.

Also, the puppets thing counts for a point of ARE YOU TRYING TO BE FUNNY?, and Dave is in fact the reason we created that count. A kid in Dave’s situation in real life would be messed up, but so would a kid in the situations of the others (or at least the girls), and Dave’s situation seems to be taken more seriously than theirs, at least later on.

ARE YOU TRYING TO BE FUNNY?: 5

BRIGHT: Back to Rose, who’s beating John over the head with a box in a futile effort to get his attention. She eventually gives up and deploys another piece of equipment called a Punch Designix, using the Shale John collected. Since she doesn’t know what it does, she pesters John and asks him to experiment.

Unfortunately John has bigger problems to deal with: His garden is by this point overrun with imps, who are climbing on his tire swing and wearing his disguises. This is enough to snap him out of his Wayward Vagabond-induced state and get him to respond to Rose. They need to get those monsters off his pogo ride!

Fortunately, Rose is able to help by picking up the piano and dropping it on the imp. Less fortunately, the piano does not survive the experience. Neither does the imp.

The pogo ride seems fine, though.

John is reluctant to risk Nanna’s ghost cookies to go retrieve the grist, so Rose uses the pogo ride to transport it up to his room. Then she tells him to go find out what the Punch Designix does, while she works on building the house up to the gate. Apparently stairs cost a lot of grist to build. John makes a SBaHJ reference while Rose recoups the grist she used to build the catwalk earlier, sending an imp tumbling into the depths.

In the kitchen, Nannasprite has produced a lot of cookies. An imp tries to sneak one, and is blasted into grist by Nanna as a result.

John sets out on a hunt for imps and useful items, grabbing some shaving cream and his pogo ride, and launching his telescope out of the window. Amazingly, this proves relevant only a few pages later.

CHEL: Dad apparently keeps an entire cabinet filled with nothing but shaving cream. Rule of Funny, I know, but how fast does this guy’s beard grow?

BRIGHT: His living room is full of imps, who have taken a shine to the Cruxtruder and left cruxite dowels lying everywhere. Armed with hammer and shaving cream, John mounts his trusty steed and pogos his way to victory, which works amazingly well (read: works at all), until he slips on a cruxite dowel and lands flat on his back.

This is incredibly dangerous!

Acting on a polite prompt, John absconds into his Dad’s study, and Rose covers his retreat with the refrigerator, which levels up to FIVESTAR GENERAL ELECTRIC and earns 285 Boondollars.

Further extremely polite prompts ask John for a can opener. Despite the presence of two imps in the study with him, John stops to consider where to find one, while Rose takes out the imps with Dad’s safe. I don’t think that counts as HURRY UP AND DO NOTHING, though, since it’s clearly supposed to be the joke.

Back in the future, the Wayward Vagabond munches on a few pages from the etiquette book. Rose updates her GameFAQs walkthrough with a series of images of John’s house in the Medium. She does refer to Colonel Sassacre’s as racist in one of these, but it’s not really much of a rebuttal.

CHEL: She experiments with building a bit more on John’s house; ladders prove cheaper to build than stairs, albeit harder to use safely. John eventually stops contemplating can openers to examine the Punch Designix, while Rose answers Dave’s angry rant about being buried in Smuppets. I think this may be another point for ARE YOU TRYING TO BE FUNNY, because in the context of a kid ranting about his brother’s annoying hobby and his friend snarking back it’s hilarious, and it seems at this point to be presented as funny, but as discussed above the nature of Smuppets makes this rather creepy.

ARE YOU TRYING TO BE FUNNY?: 6 TG: i am enrobed in chafing, wriggling god fucking damned puppet pelvis TG: an obscenely long, coarse kermit cock is being dragged across my anguished face TT: Let's put this into perspective. You put up with the puppet prostate because you love it.

Okay, this I think could be a point for CALL CPA PLEASE. A child probably would make fun of another child’s discomfort with non-consensually being surrounded by sex toys on the grounds of not knowing better, but it’s unsettling to read.

CALL CPA PLEASE: 2

John discovers there are codes on the backs of his captchalogue cards, which can be entered into the Punch Designix to make punch cards. Punching the captchalogue card itself renders the item irremovable from it, but the punch card can, he guesses, be used to recreate the item via the Totem Lathe and Alchemiter. Before he can test this, Rose hurls a bathtub through the wall to kill some nearby imps; to be fair, when he checks his PDA, he sees he missed a message from her warning him about it. He messages her back and she says the precarious staircase up to the gate is ready. John is nervous and asks why she didn’t build straight up through the hole in his dad’s bedroom ceiling.

EB: oh come on. what's the big deal, i'll just climb up and go right through! TT: Will you? EB: yeah, why not? TT: Are you saying you've never wondered what's in there? Or why it's been kept a secret from you? EB: well, i mean yeah... TT: Then trust me. You won't be going "right on through." EB: wait, are you saying there's something, like... EB: troubling in there? TT: I don't know. EB: what do you mean? what do you see in there? TT: I can't see in there. EB: oh. TT: But I don't have a very good feeling about it. EB: pfff... EB: whatever! EB: i think i can handle a few more stupid clown paintings.

Well, that’s ominous.

Examining the destroyed safe, John finds a book about shaving, several old newspaper clippings about meteor strikes, and a much older copy of Colonel Sassacre’s book, possibly the one involved in the mysterious accident which caused Nanna’s death. Behind where the safe was, he finds an empty captchalogue card and a proud fatherly note from Dad, praising him for now being strong enough to lift the safe; presumably intended for several years in the future at least, since the safe is big enough to fit John inside it. The note further explains that John is now entitled to the contents of the safe, and provides the now-useless combination for the lock. Further sylladex shenanigans launch Sassacre’s book, killing an imp, and John heads up the stairs, but slips. As he precariously clings on, the hands and jester’s motley of something much, much bigger than the imps start to emerge from the chasm...

Cut back to Dave, still searching for the beta and/or his brother, finding only that one of Bro’s swords is missing. A brief shadowy flash takes the second sword from the wall too.

You know this drill all too well. Trouble's a brewin'.

Dave heads for the door, finding one of Bro’s “ironic” comics pinned to it. The comic in question:

Erm.

TIER: Now that is, as the folks would say, unsettling.

FAILURE ARTIST: This is another work that Hussie created pre-Homestuck and decided to add. It was part of this drawing battle on a forum.

CHEL: It took me an embarrassingly long time to realise that was supposed to be Kermit. I was seeing it as a teddy bear, with the spiral cheeks as eyes and the eyes as ears.

TIER: . . . I was “literally just now” years old when I realized that was supposed to be Kermit.

BRIGHT: Ditto!

CHEL: Me too, actually, it was after I saw it while posting it here. Before I thought it was Fozzie, drawn even worse than the rest of the comic.

Dave is fairly mellow about the comic as compared to his reaction to the puppets, but thinks that he “[doesn’t] need to see this shit right now”. It looks like something a kid his age would either draw themselves or like (I know I would have loved it), but having things like this pasted randomly about your house would definitely be unsettling even so. He understands it as further irony, and thinks Bro is trying to annoy him with it as “some weird gauntlet he's throwing down to see if you will "GET IT"”.

Worse than the comics, however, is what’s in the kitchen. Weapons are piled up on every counter and the sink is full of fireworks. Dave considers this “awesome”, the implication again being that this has been normal for his whole life. He’s really lucky he’s a cartoon character, there’s no way a real kid would still be alive here. When he turns on the blender, a green puppet in it is shredded to pieces, releasing fake blood; inside the eye socket of a Jigsaw puppet on top of the microwave is a webcam, broadcasting the incident. Okay, again, we need to consider how “pornographic” PlushRumps actually is to determine whether this is a problem. Videos of a kid shredding a puppet are harmless in and of themselves. If it’s actually being marketed as fetish material… ew. Dave appears just as unsettled by this as I am, enough so to behead the cam-puppet, so the implications aren’t good.

More Smuppets spill out of the microwave, and then we go back into fucking sylladex shenanigans as Dave tries to collect every dangerous object in the room

GET ON WITH IT!: 7

Distracted by same, Dave fails to notice a silhouetted figure which is presumably his brother appearing briefly behind him, dropping Cal on the stovetop, and disappearing. Dave’s expression doesn’t change on seeing it but he literally leaps a foot in the air. Poor kid, that is freaky. We also discover why Dave had juice in his closet way back; Bro uses the fridge as storage space for swords instead of comestibles, and cherry bombs in the icemaker.

… Okay, where does Bro keep his own food? Both humorously and actually abusive/neglectful guardians still require energy intake, you know. There are later hints that Bro himself is someone’s puppet, but only in the figurative sense.

TIER: Dude probably has spots around the apartment to stash stuff, like how Dave has apple juice hidden away in his closet.

Figuring out how seriously we're supposed to be taking things can get tricky, especially with the Big Thing way later on in the comic putting earlier events in a new light upon rereading (well, mostly just stuff related to Dave).

CHEL: And if we are supposed to take it seriously, how the fuck is Dave alive? A real kid in this situation wouldn’t have lived long enough to be traumatised.

[danandthereader]

Hi! Can I ask a somewhat specific/selfish prompt? I absolutely LOVE your writing and the way you capture everything. It just feels very nice~ But I was wondering if you could write a prompt where you work in a library and Dan comes to vist (like super cute and fluffy would be absolutely adorable), and maybe eventually sexy times happen (if you’re up for it that is). The only thing I beg of is avoiding the librarian shh trope because I hate that as a librarian LOL thank you so much!

A/N: Selfish and specific prompts are more than welcome and totally encouraged, lovely ! ♡I absolutely love this, to be honest, and I’ve been so excited to fill it. I don’t think it gets too risque, so there’s no tag warnings - mostly there’s just kissing and a little touching and lots of quiet giggling. However, if you (or anyone) needs it tagged, let me know. And I hope you enjoy - heart you !

QUIET TIME

With a stack of books about half your height in both arms - heavy as all heck, but a weight you were used to, thanks to being in this position for the past eight months - you slowly trudged down row after row of books, sometimes doubling back, all in the name of organization. It wasn’t something you took lightly, organization - after this you were going to do even more organizing, going through each of the shelves to make sure that the people who had combed through the expanse of spines put them back in the right order.Librarians did not do with clutter and things out of order. It showed in just about everything you did now, from your music library to your small personal collection of books at home. Thankfully your boyfriend didn’t find it all that annoying or frustrating, calling it cute each and every time you moved things around in the closet with an excited little smile on your face, like you were a child getting to go out to play on the playground.

He was around here, Dan, somewhere among the fiction-fantasy novels, leaving you to your work but still spending time with you. He didn’t do it for long periods of time - he visited for lunch most days, bringing you something to eat when you otherwise would just skip, something you liked and was often paired with a kiss on the nose or forehead - but it was always a joy to have him around. Today, however, was a little different - you were working, but he was off, a very rare occurance that you sort of felt guilty about missing. But you were the only one here until the late afternoon, and the library needed you.As you turned into another aisle, the familiar fluff of brown curls standing before a shelf made you grin around the stack in your hands. He looked up at the sound of heavier footsteps, smiling wide at the sight of your frame blocked by the books. “You need some help there?” he asked, voice gentle in the atmosphere, but laced with humor. “Nah, I’m good,” you replied, a little breathless. “The F section is by your feet, right?” A moment of silence, you couldn’t see him, before a, “Yep.”With that, you set the stack of books down, a firm thump reverberating through the floor. “Cool.” Both of you laughed softly. “My arms are killing me.” Just because you did this kind of thing on a semi-daily basis didn’t mean it didn’t count as a good workout. Shaking out your arms, you kept the conversation going. “What’cha reading?” He showed you the cover, a dark and stormy thing with a fierce dragon on the front. “Typical fantasy garbage. My favorite.” Another laugh. “You sure you don’t need help?” He nodded to the book stack. “Nah. It’s just a few more, then I’m good to go back to the front desk.” His brows furrowed. “Well,” he began, putting his book back where it was supposed to be. “Which way you headed? I’ll tag along.” His smile was warm, loving, making your heart all fluttery. “And if you drop any books, I’ll pick them up for you.” Your brow arched, a really? sort of expression painted across your face. “C’mon, it’ll be cute. I’ve always wanted to see what being a librarian was like!” Kneeling, you picked the first two books off the pile, found their spot on the shelf nearest to the floor, and stood back up, stack coming with you. “It won’t be nearly as interesting as your dragon-slaying fantasies.”Yet as you walked away, the definitive sound of his footsteps followed behind.

He did prove more help than you originally thought, pointing out where things needed to go, and even putting things on shelves for you when you just couldn’t find a decent place to put the books you were holding. The pile grew smaller and smaller in much quicker a time than if you were doing it by yourself. Eventually, you reemerged from the stack, smiling each time he looked your way. Talking was kept to a minimum, though, only exchanging looks of adoration or the occasional incredulous eye-roll at a cover or title.Once your arms were completely empty, the final books were set in their proper place. Glancing around as Dan stood straight, you realized just what section you were in. His eye caught a title, his head tilting to read the vertical spine. “‘A Night In Manhattan’?” he said aloud, voice still library-soft. “ ‘The Secret Ingredient To Love? Wh-” He pulled out the book, eyebrows raising. “You guys have a smut section here?” He looked to you, who was quickly turning pink in the cheeks. “It’s an eighteen-plus section!” you replied defensively. The shelves were darker to mark it, but the table in front of them and the few chairs did what it could to make it look inconspicuous. “We card for these books. See? There’s even a sticker on the cover.” A point to the bright red circle sticker. “Kinky.” That single word made your whole face flame. “Dan - Danny -” He was opening the book, flipping to a random page, making you gasp. “Jesus -” Your hands flew up, covered your face.“‘His thick member entered her slick cavern, a guttural -’ Oh man, I opened it to a good part!” He was having too much fun, sounding all too amused. “Dan, please!” There were kids in the building. “‘- Gordon’s hands wrapped around her supple hips, pulling her onto him harshly, enough to bruise her milky skin. Yet Genevieve couldn’t resist moaning-’” You tried snatching the book away from him. “Okay, enough!” Yet you were snickering, mouth agape.He snatched your wrist, and with a quick movement, your back was to the shelf. “Oh but baby, it was just getting good.” His voice had dropped an octave, making your cheeks light up again. “You don’t want to hear about these two gorgeous people fucking it out in their kitchen?” He paused. “Gordon and -” He was smiling though. “God, Gordon?” he repeated, shaking his head, moment broken. “Who wants to bang a guy named Gordon?” Finally getting the book from him, you smacked him on the shoulder with it. “This is a family establishment, sir!” He begun laughing, volume raising to everyday normal. “I will not have you reading smut in my aisles!” Your voice was raising to match, laughter fluffing your pronunciation. From the other side of the bookshelf, there was a sharp shh! from another patron. The two of you stilled, eyes wide, caught in the act of doing something you weren’t supposed to do. Then you looked at each other, smiled wide, and snickered.

[everlark-interviews]

Interview with Everhutcher!

It’s been a while, but we have more interviews lined up, and we’re ready to tackle 2017 and get you the inside scoop on all your favorites, plus some newbies coming into the fandom! Reblog, follow, and get connected with the lovely folks in the HG community. Read on for all the juicy deets about @everhutcher!

Describe yourself like your friends would describe you.

Silly, weird, funny, compassionate. Honest. Loyal. Raunchy. A ball-buster. Someone with zero personal space. Good with details.

Raunchy? That’s interesting… How so?

Oh wow. I’ve just never had a filter. I think it’s a family trait. I’m from a large, loud Eastern European family where everyone speaks their mind, sarcasm is the norm, etc. As far back as high school, my friend and I would read smutty romance novels (mostly Jude Deveraux’s books) out loud at the lunch table just to make our male friends cringe. Totally juvenile, I know. I suppose if I psychoanalyzed myself I might see it as a way to explore sexuality in a safe way or something. Because I’m not nearly so bold in my actions in that way. But even now, I’ll see a double entendre in anything and won’t hesitate to point it out. Cards Against Humanity gives me life. I blame the inner 10-year old boy in me who giggles at inappropriate times. My own 10-year old son is far better behaved than I am in that aspect.

LOL! At some point our inner teen makes a reappearance. 

What Eastern European country is your family from? Have you been there?

We’re Ukrainian on both sides of the family. I’ve never been there but it has been fun to connect with cousins from over there through social media. Some of them grew up in the Soviet days, so when I was a kid, we never really had contact with them.

Give me an example of everhutcher as a ball-buster…

It’s sort of just who I am… again, the no filter thing. I will say I don’t ball-bust in a super-aggressive or antagonistic way, because I know that’s how some people interpret the term. My brand is more teasing. My husband is 14 years older than I am, so the old man jokes are abundant. I’m always telling him at the store to ask about the AARP discount or I’ll remind him that when he was 18, I was in preschool. Just often enough to creep him out.

How did you end up in THG fandom?

That was definitely not a straight line between two points. I knew of the books for a long time, but never read them. I’d also seen THG and CF on DVD at the time they came out, and was entertained enough, but didn’t love them in the way I loved other fandoms like HP or Star Wars.

Then my stepdaughter sort of made me read the books right before MJ1 came out in theaters. She promised I’d love them. And she was right. I loved them and then my love for the whole franchise grew from there.

I can relate to that! It definitely ‘snuck up’!

Have you written for other fandoms?

To be honest, nothing has grabbed me the way THG has, so no.

I get it! Same here.

I guess one exception is that I took part in a RPF Secret Santa thing for JHutch fans. I was really satisfied with how the story turned out but I’m not as comfortable writing about real people, so I have not been compelled to do that since. Kudos to those who can, though.

So what drew you into writing fic?

The ending of MJ just left me unsettled and unsatisfied. 

And although I understand that in a way, it was likely written in the way Katniss would have genuinely told it (i.e., not dwelling on details), as a reader I wanted more. So, I went in search of some insight into Suzanne Collins’ choices as a writer. Instead, I stumbled across fan fiction. I started looking for some good “growing back together” fics. And my love for the entire genre was born. Eventually I felt brave enough to dive in and write some of my own because I couldn’t get enough of Everlark in just about any setting.

What was it like for you when you posted your first fic for all to see?

The same as it is now: I hit “post” or “send” and I squeal and do a panic dance in my home office. I feel like I’m jumping off a cliff or something. 

You never know how it’s going to be received. You don’t want to look or sound stupid (the story or yourself). You might think it’s the best work you’ve done but it’s a load of shit. You just never know what will resonate with people and what won’t. I mean, ultimately you can’t worry about that during the writing process; you have to go with your gut and let the story take you where it wants to go. But you just have to hope people will see something in it that they can relate to as well.

It really never gets any easier, does it? What was a pivotal moment for you in the books?

Arghhhhhh. I think there are so many people who are so much better at noticing details of the book. So many moments. I don’t know if I can classify anything as “pivotal” but I do think some parts resonate with me more than others. The entire sequence of Peeta’s time with the Star Squad in Mockingjay was particularly important to me as a reader, as I think it lends a whole sense of hope, which is so central to the series. In particular, I think the moment Peeta realizes the lizard mutts are coming and he chooses to protect Katniss by yelling for her to run... that, to me, is it. He has already chosen Katniss over Snow in that moment.

Such a good one! What was the hardest moment for you in the series?

I would probably say Everlark’s separation at the end of Catching Fire. I’m such a sucker for those two. Throughout that book they’re connecting in a way they never had before. And unlike the film, Katniss and Peeta are both aware of the other’s presence somewhere around the lightning tree in those final moments in the arena. They can each hear the other calling out. They’re desperate to save one another, and are so close to achieving that. You know, as the reader, that it’s not going to end well for either of them. And, of course, it doesn’t.

What’s the moment you hold onto from the series? That ‘Yes! This is why I love this series’ moment…

That has to be Peeta’s return to 12. As I said earlier, you have these pivotal moments in Mockingjay where Peeta chooses Katniss, in defiance of his hijacking, sometimes without really even being conscious of it. I always wonder what happened to Peeta during his time in the Capitol after Katniss’s trial. Was it a deliberate decision to return to 12? Or was it just instinct driving him to where he felt he belonged? Either way, he returns to Katniss and his first thought is to help Katniss heal. To show Katniss some beauty in the world. He yet again creates a thing of beauty - a simple flowerbed to celebrate Prim’s life - and says “I thought we could plant them for her.” Not me, but we. Even though Katniss isn’t involved in his project, he includes her. They are a team. He is with her, in whatever way she needs. It’s unconditional and pure and lovely to see this reborn in him. Wounded but not broken.

I think you did a lovely job of picking out the details! 

What do you enjoy writing most? (Trope, canon/AU, etc)

I think modern AU is probably what comes easiest to me. For one, it’s fun to imagine Peeta Mellark alive and well and walking amongst us in the modern world just waiting for love  - and who doesn’t want that? LOL. I’m a fairly open book emotionally, more like Peeta, so writing Katniss is a fun challenge for me. And in modern AU, there’s the added challenge in presenting Katniss as someone who stays in character, still finds it hard to open up, without the details of her life in canon District 12 at play. You have to get into the psychology of a modern young woman and the things which might affect her life.

Where do you get your inspirations?

Oh, man. So many places. I suppose, now that I think about it, a lot of of my fics start with real-life events. Some are sad, like the circumstances of a friend of friend which inspired my PiP fic Promise. Others are often inspired by the random convos I have over chat or text with other bloggers. Like, Drill and Fill started with me complaining to another writer about having to go to the dentist but that thank goodness, at least my dentist was cute, and the rest unfolded from there. I also love that there are so many prompt ideas out there, whether on Tumblr or elsewhere. I’m so grateful that someone might not feel comfortable enough writing a fic on their own, but still has a great idea they want to share with others to make the story a reality.

That’s a really great observation. Give me an idea of yours that you will never write, but you would love to read.

Oooooh. That’s so tough because I think, never say never. If it’s something I’d want to read, and it doesn’t already exist, then I generally wouldn’t hesitate to at least attempt to make it a reality myself. That’s why I started writing fic, not just consuming it. I had ideas that I wanted to share. So I’d have to dig deeper to find something I’d read but not also write.

What has been your favorite fic to write?

No fair! My fics are my kids! I love them all for different reasons LOL.

If two of your fics were drowning… see where I’m going with this?

Well, if I have to choose, I’d probably say Under His Wings. I wasn’t sure where I was headed with it at all. Usually I have a strong idea to jump start the process, and my struggle is to keep the momentum of the story going later on. In this case, I had a hard time starting this story, and it picked up steam as I went along. It sort of took on a life of its own very quickly. I think it’s probably my most moving story.

What is the most challenging fic you’ve written?

I tend to write very quickly once an idea hits me, so anytime I end up with a WIP it’s because the mojo isn’t there. I’m currently on the third version of a story that I haven’t published yet. It’s supposed to be part of @papofglencoe’s clearance condom series, which she started after I took a trip to Target while chatting online with her. Her Pumpkin Spice story was such a treat, and I really want to do something fun and sexy with all that inspiration. But if I force it, I know it won’t be as good as it might have been. So WIP it remains.

If you were stranded on a desert island with any THG character, who would you pick? Just one, now!

Peeta. Hands down. Or wherever the hands want to go. See what I mean about raunchy?

HA! Down is a start in the right direction, though, yeah?

We all have that fic that’s our go to - whether it’s our own or someone else’s - that we return to because we love it and know exactly what we’re going to get. What’s yours?

If we’re talking Everlark fic, I’d probably say The Bucket List by Meadowlark27.

Why?

Faith constructed such a beautiful and heart-wrenching story that made me cry several times. If Everlark fans haven’t read it yet, it has it all. Humor and angst and sorrow and friends to lovers, all my favorite elements. And the ending. Ughhhhhh. All the feels, for sure.

What’s your writing process? Some people like to write their stories all at once, then post weekly, while others like to take it one chapter at a time, where posting is more random. Where do you fall in that spectrum?

I’d like to have the discipline to be the former, but I’m definitely the latter. Once I finish a chapter I want people to see it right away. In theory I always think it’s going to force me to work more steadily, because then I can tell myself that people have read it and want more. In reality, life always seems to fill up my time. The older I get, the more of a procrastinator I seem to become.

I get it. Why is that??

Favorite Book? (non THG)

Probably the Lord of the Rings trilogy. 

I first read it in sixth grade, not understanding the historical context in which Tolkien crafted it. At the time I just knew it as a cool good versus evil kind of story. Now I have a much deeper understanding of the historical context, and as a history teacher it speaks to me on that level, for sure. Beyond that, the immense time and energy and effort Tolkien put into creating that universe is just astonishing. The man crafted an entire mythology that the world has embraced as readily as anything mythology of ancient times.

It is incredible. I completely agree, and I love the series!

What do you like to do in your spare time?

I have to think about what spare time is these days lol. I suppose beyond work and family (my husband, son, two stepkids, daughter-in-law and any day now, a stepgrandbaby!) 

Congratulations!

My fandom activities have filled most of my free time. Otherwise, I definitely have a love for genealogy. I’ll go through spurts where I’ll spend hours a day scouring records to add to our family tree. And I enjoy traveling. I wish I had more resources for that, but I try to get out of town every couple of months, even for just a night or two. Living in the Northeast helps, being so close to so much. I’m basically halfway between NYC and Toronto; I have a ton of family and connections in Philly so I’m always there, too. I just spent my birthday in Vegas and I really want to get back out to L.A. soon. Been an East Coast girl my whole life but I love California.

Favorite thing about Tumblr?

The friendships. They’ve gone so far beyond fandom it’s sort of astonishing. The ladies I connect with the most are just about the most open, take-me-as-I-am group of people I’ve ever had the pleasure of knowing. I have my group of girlfriends here in “real” life, particularly my friends from work. But my blogger friends are a constant presence as well. Maybe even more so, because you can always shoot off a text or a group chat throughout the day, come back and find someone three time zones away has weighed in on whatever was on your mind. We throw story ideas at each other, talk about our jobs and kids, nothing is off limits. And when you know most of you write Everlark smut you can’t really hide anything after that lol. They’ve become some of the best friends I’ve ever had.

Can you give some advice to new writers?

Just don’t be afraid to jump in and try something. Challenge yourself. There is a vast community of writers out there with a huge array of talents and strengths and styles. If you are worried about how your work compares to someone else’s, and allow it to make you hesitate to write, you’re bound to hold yourself back due to fear of failure. The only failure is to not let you idea come to life in one way or another. Put it out there and share it. Audiences are always going to be better off for it.

Thank you for taking time to talk to me!

You can find Everhutcher’s stories on AO3. Don’t forget to leave a comment! And stop by her ask box to say hey! 

[canaryatlaw]

I'm....tired. I was majorly MIA on here today I know, I was just doing a million other things, lol. Tuesday's are just so long, my 14 hour days...sigh. But today was fine. Woke up at 7 and went to work, and there was the whole birth certificate debacle that I wrote about earlier and won't repeat her because I don't want to get re-irritated about it, but it was nice to hear that my supervisor stood up for me. I worked on typing up the final prayer for relief on my motion then, which didn't take very long at all. But other than that I didn't really have much to do for the morning, so I mostly tried to memorize mock trial stuff (no just reading fan fiction for now) and then one of the lawyers gave me a file with a criminal investigation report to fill out. The kid's 15 and has been "on run" from her group home placement since October (I swear the way they straight up lose kids in the system is appalling) and they strongly suspect she's with her bio mom in Wisconsin, and of course she can get in trouble for keeping her when she's not supposed to. The odd thing is that she's really adopted by a maternal great aunt who was indicated for neglect and is the reason she was placed in the system in the first place, but apparently she was in the system in Wisconsin when she was younger and then was adopted by her maternal great aunt. Just reading the file made me really sad though. This poor girl. I'm definitely more sensitive for kids that are around my sister's age, because she's my baby sister, and if they're the same age they're really just children too, and the way they've been treated is just awful. Like, yes of course this girl has legit behavior problems, I'm not going to deny that. But the adoptive mother straight up left the girl at the hospital after being told she didn't qualify for admission to the psych ward because she "couldn't deal with her anymore" and refused to let her come home. Like....what the fuck??? I don't care if she's adopted, THATS YOUR FUCKING CHILD, you don't just abandon them like that because you don't want to deal with them anymore. I was so, so irritated. And the weird part is the adoptive mother has enough money to not qualify for a PD and has to get a private attorney (which I've literally only seen in a handful of cases) which meant she has the resources to get her help, but no, she just dumps her on the system.....ugh. And then this child is talking about how her adoptive mother previously shipped her off to live with her bio mother or father and how she was using and dealing drugs while she was there and had been prostituting while there as well. Like.....this girl is 15 years old for fuck's sake, and she's already been through hell, and all I know is she deserves so much better than this. These are exactly the kind of cases that make me want to fix the system so badly, when atrocious things are going on that the system just doubles down on and compounds. I was so annoyed, but anyway. I worked on that for a while into the afternoon, and then told my supervisor I was out of work, so he gave me a file that's up for a permanency hearing on Thursday and asked if I could see if there was a child behavior assessment in there on the second kid as we had one for the first, then asked if I wanted to handle the permanency hearing on Thursday and of course I said yes so I looked through the file and read it to familiarize myself with the case. My supervisor had told me a little about it, it's yet another child death, except this time the child death was in 1996 and the current case is about the kids she had after getting out of prison for 10 years (because please tell me how serving 10 years after being convicted of first degree murder for throwing your newborn into a dumpster where he was taken to the dump and crushed to death is okay by any means at all), and of course these kids got taken right away and the rights were already terminated, so there's nothing to contest, just trying to move towards adoption. The thing here is that the foster parent who's had the kids they're whole lives and wants to adopt just almost lost the placement because she let her out on electronic monitoring heroin dealer boyfriend move into the home without telling the agency, and said she didn't see what the problem was because he would never do anything to hurt the kids. Sigh....So that should be interesting, I'm excited though. I did that for most of the afternoon, and I did stop in to see my friend from last semester who had the office across from mine and fill her in on everything I'm doing now, she was impressed that the first motion they put me on is a big contested thing and not like, a motion to extend wardship or something basic like that, lol. The motion got officially printed up today though and it has my name on it and everything and I'm so excited lol. I'm a dork I know. But it was nice to see her and chat for a bit. Headed out at 5 and headed to the other courthouse (my exciting life) for trial ad. I knew tonight's class was gonna be kind of a mess because it was all about getting exhibits into evidence and it was just all over the place and our instructor wanted us to do different things than what was in the book....sigh. I was a witness again but the prompt was like super vague and gave me nothing to build a character on, but I did crack a few jokes on cross that got some laughs (like saying the assailants were wearing white polo shirts with popped collars and how my computer bag that was stolen also contained my 400 page graphic novel I've been pouring my life into for the past 5 years because why the fuck not?) so that was mildly entertaining at least. Other than that the class dragged though and we once again went like 10 minutes over which was annoying. Came home from there, and of course turned on legends when I got home. It's late and I'm tired so I don't want to write too much on it here especially because I already wrote a lot on Twitter, but I loved tonight's episode and I think it's my favorite episode to date really. They did such a good finally interweaving the historical plot with the villain scheme in a way that works and adds to both of them instead of having to choose one or the other. I don't like seeing Sara hurt of course, but I knew actually killing her off right now would be the dumbest thing the writers could possibly do, and I don't think they're THAT stupid (or at least not Arrow writers re Laurel stupid) so I wasn't really worried there, plus I knew if they actually did something like that it would've been all over Twitter by the time I got to watch the episode. I loved her interactions with Jax and Stein throughout it, and I adored how Jax was so intent on saving her and was fighting off Rip and almost fucking killed him (I was like okay I don't actually want him to shoot Rip but I kind of want him to shoot Rip) and they've done their sibling like relationship so ridiculously well this season I love every minute of it. And then FUCKING RIP, MAN. I was literally just starting to tolerate him, lol, and I know he was rewired by the legion but still, I don't know if I can ever forgive him for actually fucking killing Sara (though I maintain that even after being shot and going through surgery Sara would've been able to fight Rip off and not just lay there helpless). The Mick and George Washington bromance was epic and I loved it. I was largely meh on the whole Nate/Amaya thing just because I don't see how it added to the story at all other than having a romance for the sake of romance and it felt totally out of the blue because they literally haven't done anything T lead up to this point. Sigh. It could have potential to be a good storyline, but I don't particularly ship them right now or have much confidence that I ever will. Okay, I think that's enough and my eyes want to be closed now, so I will be doing that now. Goodnight friends. Hope you sleep well.