#lol this is a tad aggressive but you don't understand i am on top of the world this is my legacy

[posallys]

Pjo show 🤝 pjo movies

Absolutely NAILING poseidon and sally dynamic

[variousqueerthings]

its taking so much self control not to search for all the messy trap, BJ, and hawk fics (that I hope exist!). also that bridget jones video is amazing, its so easy to forget how awkward real life fighting actually is lol. Im picturing BJ as darcy and trap as cleaver. side note, I also read your hawk/lyle and it was honestly so good, well written and soo hot!

oh hai, I didn't see you there!

EDIT: So this is not what your ask is about and I'm sorry, I went on a post-finale watching tangent, I apologise for not being funny anymore, even though the original post was light-hearted. GFA spoilers

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It's funny, because now I've seen the finale, I feel like I need to wallow for a bit in the version of the story in which BJ and Hawkeye never see each other again.

It's got that sweet, sweet bitterness to it.

It's also funny, both my flatmate and my partner -- although I will hazard not to put words in their mouths -- are, let's say, not fond of BJ, because, well... he does many a highly questionably thing in response to the Horrors, especially to Hawkeye, but to me at least that ending, it's very much offering a final understanding of that character that softens him just a tad (to me, my feelings).

He undoubtedly, unthinkingly, several times messes up with Hawkeye within those two hours alone (which is worse: bringing up babies to the guy who's just had a breakdown brought on by the death of a baby, or leaving without a note, possibly knowing some element of the way that Trapper left, if not the entire thing???)

And then when Hawkeye, in a particularly harrowing way, reaches out to him (what would you do if I were bleeding out in your arms -- paraphrased) he brushes it off, because he's steadily become more depressed and therefore self-centred in how he gets through it all, and has used Hawkeye to project more than been able to look at him directly, to absorb any of Hawkeye's pain on top of his own. And here's Hawkeye invoking the most terrible, final goodbye he can think of, and BJ runs away from it. It's terrible!

And then!

And then he does it!

He does the one thing that Hawkeye asked of him, in the way he could do it. He left him a note. He made it as big as possible. He said the only thing that really needed to be said in it: goodbye.

Is it enough? After all of that? Maybe that's not really what the question can be (after all, a better man is not what Hawkeye's ever asked for from him, and in many ways BJ's bitterness about being a replacement for Hawkeye's pain about Trapper is not unfounded either -- the projection goes both ways, even if one is more overtly aggressive).

But he did it.

It's funny too, I was saying around s10 that I was really missing the big gestures of s7 -- I have yet to confirm on this my second watch (and feel free to let me know if there is an example I've forgotten), but I don't think BJ ever does anything as big for Hawkeye as he does in s7ep2, that sort of declaration, it was gargantuan in its scale and continued to exist in metaphor in those faded, pink pieces of clothing BJ kept for most of the rest of the show. I confess I missed the moment they were no longer there, but I believe at least not throughout the entirety of Goodbye, Farewell and Amen.

And this was a gesture, it was the thing I'd been wondering about the absence of and missing, and hoping BJ might in some way find it in himself to return to -- to not be so blinded by what he thinks he needs (to keep his eyes firmly on home and Peggy and Erin), but to value what he's had here, to value Hawkeye enough to grant him that goodbye.

SO after all of that thinking about BJ and Trapper potentially meeting (and tbh I think once I'm past this initial stage of just... sitting with the finale for 5 to 100000 business days, I will go back to thinking about it, the scenario is fantastic), I am currently, as it turns out in reaction to that ending, far more focused on the importance of goodbyes.