#lol friday the 13th except it's thursday and not the 13th

[ye-it-is-skeet]

Risetober Day 3: Todd Scouts 🎃🌲🔪

Todd Scouts Lesson 13: What to do when there's a Murderer in the Woods by the Campground (or is that too obvious?)

Not all of them will be movie references, just the ones I think can have a movie to reference, heheh ✨

[a-mag-a-day]

MAG 77 - hair dying session

"There is a stranger claiming to be my mother." - A capital S Stranger even!

"Everyone else says that she’s my mother, and gives me looks of alarm when I tell them she’s an impostor." - The Not!Them actually has some kind of Spiral vibes to it. Gaslighting is usually the territory of the Spiral and gaslighting will subsequently happen by the people who are under the Not!Them's influence. Melanie even asked Jon last episode if he's gaslighting her.

I feel really bad for the statement-giver. She sure had a shitty mum… Come to think of it, why does Jonny like shitty mums so much? xD (this mum, Martin's mum, Jon's grandma as "mum figure"… And then Jonny's actual rl mum had to read this, lol)

"But sometimes I worry that the reason we could never get on was that we were far too much alike." - Like Jon and Melanie!^^ There is something about stubborn, big-mouthed, (unkind) people, who I personally would consider arseholes, and that dynamic with others like them. Somehow I always felt such persons would get along with each other far better than an arsehole person and someone who is more considerate of others. At least the former feels more evenly leveled to me. With the other pair the considerate person would probably suffer under the arsehole, depending if that person takes it to heart.

"He moved up beside the plump old woman standing in the doorway and looked at me, smiling." - Oh, that sound that starts alongside the ambiance track right at the word "smiling" is really cool!

"I used to think I hated my mother; I really did. But now I can’t stop listening to those tapes, now I know they’re the only way I’ll ever hear her voice again." - Just like in MAG 75, I like the tragedy and dilemma of this statement. The statement-giver always resented her mother and now she desperately wants her back. Although this "new" mother seems to have a cheery personality, seems to be "a better mother" (except that it's a murderous monster of course) with nothing left of that cold, judging emotional abuse the statement-giver had to grow up with.

"Based on the interactions and effects, I suspect this to be the creature that Adelard Dekker refers to as the “NotThem” in statement 9910607" - Dekker name drop! And Gertrude actually does a good job at cross referencing here! Not so chaotic after all, or, not being chaotic when it's actually being needed. "Personally, I suspect it to be an aspect of The Stranger" - Smirke's 14 name drop! Referred to them by those exact names up until this point we have heard of The Vast (MAG 46) and The End (MAG 62).

"The sheer power that it must be able to call upon to be able to rewrite so much of reality" - ok so I haven't heard anything from SCP (well, not exactly, I listened to The Hanged King because it was recommended to me, but it didn't quite click with me), but a friend of mine (who still has to finish TMA. He's on MAG 50) likes the SCP stuff very much and he told me of a concept that exists there, which reminds me of this. Reality Benders. That one sounds super terrifying, so I might check it out some time.

Oh no, and now we get to the part of poor little meow meow…

"and given Melanie’s outburst last week" - well aaaactually… Melanie's statement was on the 13th of February 2017. That was a Monday! Given that MAG 80 happens on the 16th of February, so three days later on a Thursday of the same week of course, "last week" doesn't really make sense. This has happened before, MAG 22 happened on March 12th 2016. That was a Saturday. Apparently the archives team works on Saturdays?? And MAG 26, 2nd of April is also a Saturday. Though it makes sense here, as Sasha says he has woken up Martin, who lives in the archives at that point. They probably called Jon. Just a few episodes ago, MAG 70, the date matched up with the day of the week though. 6th January and Karolina Górka remarks that it was a Friday evening.

"How it works. How it ki…" - T__T Jon sounds so distressed. Determined to do something, yet absolutely smashed to pieces when this thoughts wander further than his mouth does.

Why does this podcast do emotions so well? T______T

I like the Spiral aspect of the Notthem, it can't feed if there isn't one person going crazy because they're the only person recognizing them for what they are

Btw we also heard of the Beholding and Desolation from Gerry in the hospital statement. Where else were they explicitly mentioned I wonder

[orangeblossomstudies]

2020-09-13

So I haven’t been active in a bit and wanted to do this challenge but have been hella busy, so I'm gonna info dump this and hopefully be able to keep up after haha. Thanks for making this @spell-studies​!

-------------

1. Monday, August 24th: What classes are you taking?

- i’m taking two classes, Management of Information Organization and Museum Informatics.

2. Tuesday, August 25th: What time does your alarm go off?

- i actually don’t really have an alarm these days but I wake up around 10-11 most days because of my dog then I start remote work at noon.

3. Wednesday. August 26th: Do you check your phone when you first wake up?

- absolutely. i am very active on discord where most of my friends are, so I always check that and maybe read a few chapters in whatever I’m currently reading online.

4. Thursday, August 27th: What is your favorite season? Why?

- i live in Florida so my favorite season here is winter because that's the only time we ever get any semblance of a chill. outside where I live, I’d probably say fall though just because I’m not a fan of temperatures below 40 and its always so pretty and the atmosphere is just something I live for. 

5. Friday, August 28th: Tea or coffee?

- anyone who knows me knows I pick tea (I’m somewhat of a collector).

End of week one Saturday, August 29th: How did this week go for you?

- i can say that the last week of august was actually my first week back to normalcy as I’d been struggling with a back injury all month. this week was my first week in which I could do some, not all, of the basic every day things I’d been unable to do for what felt like forever (sitting down, driving, waking up even).

End of week one Sunday, August 30th: What is your plan for the upcoming week?

- i actually didn’t have very many plans for the next week except for work!

6. Monday, August 31st: What is your favorite thing about school?

- right now nothing as my course load is excruciatingly boring.

7. Tuesday, Sept. 1st: Favorite school memory! (Not online lol).

- I honestly can’t think of one. I have an awful memory, so I’m at a loss here :/

8. Wednesday, Sept. 2nd: How do you take your coffee?

- if I have coffee, which is rare, I usually have blonde coffee with a decent DECENT amount of almond milk and enough sugar to make it not bitter at all haha.

9. Thursday, Sept. 3rd: How do you take your tea?

ooo. this one is hard as it depends on the tea. if it's a black tea/masala I might put in some almond milk and sugar crystals. for green teas, chamomile, florals etc I usually take it straight.

10. Friday, Sept. 4th: Favorite study snack!

- hot cheetos and watermelon ICE drinks for sure.

End of week two Saturday, Sept. 5th: How did this week go for you?

- skip

End of week two Sunday, Sept. 6th: What is your plan for the upcoming week?

- skip

11. Monday, Sept. 7th: Currently reading!

- just, ya know, stuff. on a website. might have something to do with a mango...

12. Tuesday, Sept. 8th:  How do you take notes?

- currently I don’t as it’s not necessary for my classes but usually I’d take basic notes in class then rewrite them at home.

13. Wednesday, Sept. 9th: What is your goal aesthetic?

- grunge cottage core? don’t know if that makes sense but I’m not totally sure how else to describe it. 

14. Thursday, Sept. 10th: Are you a morning person or a night person?

- currently I’m a night person but I really enjoy mornings on days I have nothing planned--when I can actually get up for them.

15. Friday, Sept. 11th: Day in your life!

- nowadays I usually wake up around 5 because my elderly, dying cat needs to go to the bathroom or wants water. I’ll then go back to sleep around 5:30/6 and wake up somewhere between 10/11 to take my dog out. I’ll then lay in bed as long as possible before I need to shower and start work (remotely). On Fridays, I work 12-3. I’ve been working on some Slavery related papers from St. Augustine we have at the archive. I’m usually active on discord with my friends during this time lol. It’s a pretty relaxed job. The rest of the day was just relaxed, played a few online games and read a bit before binge eating and going to sleep O_O

End of week three Saturday, Sept. 12th : How did this week go for you?

- it was ok. nothing special. i did get some toner for my hair which I was excited for. I’m naturally blonde but the brassiness has been getting on my nerves recently as I’ve not been in the sun to lighten it.

End of week three Sunday, Sept. 13th: What is your plan for the upcoming week?

- work and classes as usual. I might go to my friends house for dinner as her and her fiancé now have their own place. Other than that I’ll just be chilling. 

[myeyesarebrighter]

The timing on this offer is awful, which leads me to believe it might go somewhere. Life is funny like that. 

I leave Sunday for a week in London (for work). If they accept or counter to accept, we need to have a home inspection done by Thursday next week. I get home Thursday night at 7pm. LOL. P is solo parenting the kids from Sunday am through Thursday pm.

Then we need financing in place by November 15. 

Then we close Friday before Christmas. 

I literally could not pick a worse series of dates except if we had gone with a Friday December 13th closing and that’s just because we are fucking superstitious... 

So, in closing, this is going to happen and I’m going to end up having christmas eve dinner in an empty house (either one I just bought or one I’m still trying to sell). Thanks for coming to my nervous breakdown. Have a good night. 

[backroombuzz]

Crickets From Democrats and Media About Chicago Gun Violence

Democrats Drag Out Their Soapbox Every Time Some POS White Boy Shoots A Gun, But Blacks and Minorities You Get Crickets From The Hypocrite Left

After another school shooting it's not shocking to read the left tweeting out their typical 'something must be done about guns' diatribe bullshit. What you won't hear from these hypocrite POS's is the least bit of outrage about the mass murder happening in Chicago every single day. For all their liberal gun bluster, Chicago has proven that there is only one solution. To combat senseless gun violence, an armed law abiding citizen is the only way to protect law-abiding citizens from criminals. I doubt that the POS 17-year-old would have walked into Santa Fe High if he knew someone was inside ready to shoot back. For all the leftist talk, the liberal loony toons never propose anything that would actually have stopped the school shootings in Santa Fe, or Parkland, or the Texas Church shooting or....... The sad truth is everything a lefty gun control lover could propose has been done tried by previous Chicago Mayors and that includes their latest Loony Toon Liberal Mayor. Here's a short list of current Chicago Mayor Rahm Emanuel's brilliant fails: He’s fired and hired multiple police superintendents He’s tried (unsuccessfully) to eliminate gun stores within city limits He’s tried (unsuccessfully) to keep shooting ranges out of his town. He fought concealed carry He's outlawed citizens wearing bullet proof vests or any gun protection for that matter. He’s tried paying gang bangers with tax dollars in hopes they would stop banging... His mom? In September 2016, Rahm Emanuel announced the city would spend $36 million in youth mentoring efforts, policing strategies and gun legislation as his plan to fight and prevent crime. In 2017 there were 3,566 shootings. Yes that was down from the 4,369 shootings in 2016. Except you would need to overlook the fact that 2017 ranked #2 all time and had almost 600 more shootings than in 2015. So if you want to claim success... Good luck!  Number of REPORTED shootings in Chicago 2012 2013 2014 2015 2016 2017 2018 2,518 2,186 2,581 2,981 4,369 3,566 Rahm Emanuel's latest scheme to end the shooting gallery is almost as ridiculous as Chicago voters year after year electing yet another corrupt and/or inept Democrat to run America's third largest city. Rahm's big idea to cut down on the approximately 600 homicides committed within the city each year? Punish banks who make loans to weapons manufacturers. But as usual, the Democrats never think their "Big Idea" through. Chicago's financial situation is in shambles, and they are close to $40 Billion dollars in debt. That kind of shortfall equates to 1970's NYC financial ruin level. I'm just spitballing here but I don't think it's a great idea to spit in the face of the only institution that is preventing Chicago from becoming the next Detroit. Crickets Where is all the over the top hyperbole from David Hogg, Rosie, Alyssa Milano, CNN, MSNBC, The Big Three fake News Networks, The DNC, The DCCC, and Democrats in general... Hell, where is Obama speaking out about Chicago gun violence? After-all it's his hometown and home of the future Obama library (LOL Maybe). Where is Joe Biden who claims that 'America has Stormy Daniels (prostituted) the Second Amendment.' Where is Nancy Pelosi or Chuck Schumer spewing their typical 'jump the shark' statements when it comes to Chicagoans having to sleep on the floor to avoid being shot through a window?  They sure spout off every time some retarded POS white boy shoots up a school. Hell, now according to the latest liberal reporting those inbreed morons no longer even need to use an AR-15 to have the left hyperventilate about their so-called "Common sense gun control" i.e. Repealing the Second Amendment. The Santa Fe School shooting introduced America to two new liberal loony toon phrases "AR-15 Like" and the incredibly asinine USA today created phrase ‘less-lethal' than an AR-15. As long as the left can get AR-15 in their gun control story all's good in Liberal La-La-Land. But somehow the Democrats and MSM seem to never address the thousands of shootings taking place each year in dozens of generational run Democratic, gun controlled cities like Chicago, Detroit or Baltimore? Chicago has some of the toughest gun laws in the nation but year in and year out the Windy City's streets are basically a shooting gallery that have law-abiding citizens running for their lives. 22 in 2018 The Democrats latest love has been spewing their "22 school shootings in 2018." Yes, it's nothing but BS when you consider the fake news media and the Democrats who thought it up are counting a BB gun incident among those 22 school shootings. But while liberals are using months as their parameter, in Chicago they count their shooting in minutes. To get a sense of how hypocritically sick the left are when spewing their bullshit '22 in 2018.' This list shows the victims of Chicago gun violence covering a 12-day span, let me repeat that A12-DAY SPAN.  Via The Chicago Tribune May 16th, Wednesday 11:00 AM, May 16 - 27-Year-Old Male READ STORY 11:00 PM, May 16 - 18-Year-Old Male READ STORY 10:07 PM, May 16 - 25-Year-Old Male 9:08 PM, May 16 19-Year-Old Male READ STORY  7:55 PM, May 16 - 46-Year-Old Male READ STORY 7:55 PM, May 16 - 53-Year-Old Male READ STORY 7:35 PM, May 16 - 25-Year-Old Male READ STORY 7:40 PM, May 16 - 36-Year-Old Female READ STORY 3:35 PM, May 16 - 31-Year-Old Male READ STORY May 15th, Tuesday 3:20 PM, May 15 - 20-Year-Old Male 3:20 PM, May 15 - 20-Year-Old Male 7:15 PM, May 15 - 20-Year-Old Male 5:40 PM, May 15 - 19-Year-Old Male 4:30 PM, May 15 - 20-Year-Old Female 9:05 PM, May 15 - 37-Year-Old Male 11:45 PM, May 15 - 30-Year-Old Male 11:54 PM, May 15 - 21-Year-Old Male 11:02 AM, May 15 - 18-Year-Old Male READ STORY May 14th, Monday 5:25 PM, May 14 - 17-Year-Old Male READ STORY 5:25 PM, May 14 - 19-Year-Old Male READ STORY 12:05 AM, May 14 - 22-Year-Old Male READ STORY May 13th, Sunday 8:00 PM, May 13 - 24-Year-Old Male 2:35 PM, May 13 - 20-Year-Old Male READ STORY 2:30 PM, May 13 - 38-Year-Old Female READ STORY 11:45 AM, May 13 - 27-Year-Old Male READ STORY 12:30 AM, May 13 - 23-Year-Old Male READ STORY May 12th, Saturday 12:24 AM, May 12 - 21-Year-Old Male READ STORY 5:46 PM, May 12 - 43-Year-Old Male READ STORY 12:10 PM, May 12 - 29-Year-Old Male READ STORY 10:15 AM, May 12 - 15-Year-Old Male READ STORY 2:03 PM, May 12 - 15-Year-Old Male READ STORY 2:36 PM, May 12 - 34-Year-Old Male READ STORY 5:46 PM, May 12 - 40-Year-Old Male READ STORY 7:43 PM, May 12 - 29-Year-Old Male READ STORY 11:35 PM, May 12 - 35-Year-Old Male READ STORY 3:32 AM, May 12 - 39-Year-Old Male READ STORY 2:00 AM, May 12 - 27-Year-Old Male READ STORY 1:09 AM, May 12 - Female READ STORY 1:09 AM, May 12 - 41-Year-Old Male READ STORY 12:24 AM, May 12 - 28-Year-Old Male May 11th, Friday 10:53 PM, May 11 - 27-Year-Old Male READ STORY 9:41 PM, May 11 - 29-Year-Old Male 9:17 PM, May 11 - 18-Year-Old Male 7:45 PM, May 11 - 19-Year-Old Male READ STORY 2:30 AM, May 11 - 35-Year-Old Male READ STORY May 10th, Thursday 2:18 PM, May 10 - 17-Year-Old Male READ STORY 11:28 PM, May 10 - 23-Year-Old Male READ STORY 10:56 PM, May 10 - 18-Year-Old Male READ STORY 7:35 PM, May 10 - 17-Year-Old Male READ STORY 7:35 PM, May 10 - 13-Year-Old Male READ STORY 2:00 PM, May 10 - 22-Year-Old Male READ STORY 11:49 AM, May 10 - 24-Year-Old Male READ STORY  May 9th, Wednesday 10:35 PM, May 9 - 18-Year-Old Male READ STORY 10:35 PM, May 9 - 15-Year-Old Male READ STORY  9:49 PM, May 9 - 21-Year-Old Female READ STORY 9:49 PM, May 9 - 26-Year-Old Male READ STORY 4:40 PM, May 9 - 43-Year-Old Male READ STORY 3:30 AM, May 9 - 31-Year-Old Male READ STORY 12:40 AM, May 9 - 29-Year-Old Male READ STORY May 8th, Tuesday 10:48 PM, May 8 - 28-Year-Old Male READ STORY 9:45 PM, May 8 - 23-Year-Old Female READ STORY 8:45 PM, May 8 - 53-Year-Old Male READ STORY 9:34 PM, May 8 - 18-Year-Old Male READ STORY 9:34 PM, May 8 - 60-Year-Old Male READ STORY 8:45 PM, May 8 - 20-Year-Old Male READ STORY 8:30 PM, May 8 - 15-Year-Old Female READ STORY 7:20 PM, May 8 - 43-Year-Old Male READ STORY 7:20 PM, May 8 - 28-Year-Old Male READ STORY 7:20 PM, May 8 - 33-Year-Old Male READ STORY 6:27 PM, May 8 - 16-Year-Old Female READ STORY 5:28 PM, May 8 - 24-Year-Old Male READ STORY 1:58 PM, May 8 - 24-Year-Old Male READ STORY 1:58 PM, May 8 - 27-Year-Old Male READ STORY 12:30 AM, May 8 - Male READ STORY May 7th, Monday 9:50 PM, May 7 - 27-Year-Old Male READ STORY 6:15 PM, May 7 - 29-Year-Old Female READ STORY 6:15 PM, May 7 - 26-Year-Old Male READ STORY 4:37 PM, May 7 - 30-Year-Old Male READ STORY 4:04 PM, May 7 - 36-Year-Old Male READ STORY 1:33 AM, May 7 - 26-Year-Old Male READ STORY May 6th, Sunday 2:30 AM, May 6 - 23-Year-Old Male READ STORY 11:20 PM, May 6 - 35-Year-Old Male READ STORY 9:28 PM, May 6 - 22-Year-Old Male READ STORY 9:00 PM, May 6 - 32-Year-Old Male READ STORY 4:00 AM, May 6 - 33-Year-Old Male READ STORY 4:53 AM, May 6 - Male READ STORY 2:48 AM, May 6 - 28-Year-Old Male READ STORY 3:28 AM, May 6 - Male READ STORY 2:15 AM, May 6 - 29-Year-Old Male READ STORY 1:54 AM, May 6 - 35-Year-Old Male READ STORY 2:01 AM, May 6 - 24-Year-Old Male READ STORY 2:01 AM, May 6 - 22-Year-Old Male READ STORY 12:24 AM, May 6 - 29-Year-Old Male READ STORY May 5th, Saturday 7:59 PM, May 5 - 55-Year-Old Female READ STORY 9:21 PM, May 5 - 23-Year-Old Male READ STORY 9:21 PM, May 5 - 12-Year-Old Male READ STORY 7:59 PM, May 5 - 35-Year-Old Female READ STORY 1:56 AM, May 5 - 30-Year-Old Male READ STORY The only gun control that Democrats want is a total repeal of the Second Amendment. Can't wait to hear the left tell us how exactly they will confiscate 350 million guns from 100 million law-abiding citizens, not to mention the criminals. The Democrats keep telling us that if Trump fires Mueller it will create a civil war, just wait till they try to confiscate 350 million guns, they'll see what a real civil war will actually look like. To See Reporting On Chicago Gun Violence Done In Absolute perfection Then You Must Go To HeyJackass.com.  Not only do they have every stat imaginable, you know you're in the presence of greatness when a site unpacks Chicago gun violence stats so well they have this:

I am so friggin envious of HeyJackass.com brilliance LOL. Read the full article

[lost-kiwi-dev]

update: demo is dropping friday 13th august (spooky) sometime in the afternoon nzdt.

what this basically means is that it's being released on the thursday night for everyone except me LOL.

demo drop this week????

[brittneybb1988-blog]

Fuck boi. Installment 1

It’s 3:07am. On a cold Wednesday night. Hump day was our thing. We humped on hump day ( now that I think about it ...once) and you made that joke to me... after of course and I think that’s when I fell a little bit more in like with you.

I am laying here wide awake. Unable to stop my self from thinking about you.

Wondering if you are thinking of me too.

But of course you aren’t. You are cuddled up with her. I am sure you haven’t even given me a second thought. You sun of a mothering fucking beach. You lied. You lied to me... and I believed you. Hung on your every word. Felt sorry for you. I feel like such an idiot.

Anyway , it’s 3:11am now. I should stop thinking about you. Because you sure as Shit aren’t thinking about me. There’s no possible way you could have ever cared for me ... or “respected” me as you once said.

People who care about other people... don’t do what you did.

There are three sides to every story. I only have mine. And I have to tell it. Because it’s eating me up inside that I got tricked sooooo badly. I know some of you reading this are thinking “same” and I wish you weren’t.

Here’s my story of the ultimate fuck boi. The one... you know the one. The one who played you for a fool. The one who made you feel like the only girl in the world. And then for some reason... left you standing alone... crying by your car on Friday the 13th. The one who made you feel bad for him AS HE WAS BREAKING UP WITH YOU!

Who the fuck does that?

It’s 3:16am now. This is helping me feel better. I feel like I need to vent this. Share it with the world. And I need to do it in just the right way. It’s hard to let someone know just how much they hurt you. But I’ll never tell anyone ( except all of you ) how bad this one got me. Where to start this story? “Of the two week fling” “ just forget about me” fuuuuuck you. (Those are things he has said after the fact) like whoa Bro don’t tell me how to feel 😂 I wish I could just let this go. Why can’t I just Elsa it and let this mothering fucking all of it go? I’ll tell you why, cause I was a fool. I feel slighted and taken advantage of.

Also never ever date anyone at work. Sure some people get married to their co workers but you have to remember.... they are the exception not the rule. And honey... I am the rule.

I decided to quit my job of five years. A week before my 5 year anniversary. I had loved my job. Still love my old co workers to death. They are amazing and I only stayed as long as I did because I loved them. I just woke up one day and said I hate my life. I applied for 17 jobs that day. The first one to call... was an hour and a half after I applied. I had my little phone interview... face to face the next day. I was offered the job Thursday of that week. I applied Monday . Quick turn around!

I wasn’t sure I’d go through with it. Leaving my cozy job I hated making lots of money for a chance at something new. With less pay. I kind of regret this choice now. But mostly, I am grateful I did it. My new job has a lot of pluses. And mostly I am happy. I know I promised you a story about a fuck boi... I am getting there . You have to know where it started. And I’d like to think... it started when I put my 2 week notice in on my five year anniversary. And quit my old job. Out with the old Britney... in with the new.

How weird to care about a job again? It had been easily 2 years since I gave a rats ass about my job. That’s a long time. A long time. I still miss it sometimes. I mean it was only 4 months ago. I guess I do have feelings. I care a lot . I just try to hide it. I have a terrible fear of being vulnerable. That’s a whole other story though.

I started my new job July 10th . After some encouraging words from an old boss/ fling. He always has had my best interests at heart. Which is endearing and sweet baby Jesus am I glad he got promoted shortly after I took the position. It was nice to see him but holy crazy. Again, that’s another story. ( are you seeing a trend? Maybe it’s me that’s crazy! I’ll tell this story and you can be the judge)

So I start the new job. I decided I’d create a new persona. Super nice and forgiving And I’d wear dresses and makeup everyday. Really try for this new job. And I did. Still do. Training for this new job was 90 days. Three months . Three long months. I vowed not to date anyone at work early into training. I’d done that before... it never works out. Maybe it’s me.

Then one day... I’d say like my third week of training... I saw him. Sitting on the other side of the call center. Tall , semi handsome and you know what? I won’t lie to you... I fell in that moment. I fell hard for this bearded stranger. He was physically everything I’d ever wanted in a man. Nice smile, easy on the eyes and wearing a Deadpool shirt with tacos on it. My dream guy . I wish I could take the moment back. I wish so so much I could take it all back. But I can’t.

This hurts more writing it then I thought it would. I feel so vulnerable. And if he ever reads this... I think it would make it worse. But he’s not really into this style of writing so I think I am safe? Fuck it. I get to tell my side. For me. No one owns me. No one gets to down play my feelings. Not even you.

It’s now 3:41am. I am currently trying to get my self back together. No one really knows how bad this rocked me. I am always the tough girl. But this one really hurt. And it hasn’t stopped hurting. I am doing what I always do. Fake it til you make it. And it was working. It really was. Until the latest little update in this saga. And now it feels like I have been hurt all over again. As I write this... I seriously wonder if anyone gives a flying fuck about this. About me. About my story. I’ll never let anyone read this... so we will never know.

Anyway. Back to the day that ruined my life. It’s 3:44am now. I’ll write until 4am and then I like have to go to bed.

I saw him. Made eye contact and I Shit you not... I fell in love right there. Right on the spot. I know Love is a strong word. For only knowing someone such a short time. But I loved him. In that moment. And for a while after.

Any way... after the eye contact. I tried to avoid him. It was the first time I’d seen him... how hard could it be? Answer : very hard. I started seeing him everywhere. Out side... walking by my desk. I thought it was all a coincidence... I found out later I was wrong. So wrong.

It took me a long time to say hi. He’d say hi... I’d not reply. Then one day... I told him I liked his shirt. A few weeks later... I sat at his desk in training. And I looked through his stuff. Because I am nosey as fuck. And I ran into him outside later that day... and told him I looked through his stuff. And that I liked his hat. He then gifted me this hat. ( which has since been gifted to my best friends child because fuck that noise. Thanks for ruining Pikachu for me, you dirty lying cunt)

Update ... it’s 350am. I am getting tired. I wonder if I should like post this somewhere? Or if I should just close my eyes and go to sleep. Pray the lord my soul to keep. Do re mi so fucking done with you girl! Lol

Where does one ever post this? Nah can’t post it. One person reads this that I know... and they will know it’s me. I can’t lie or hide very well. Even if it’s all name changed. Fuck it. Maybe they won’t. Maybe they will. What’s going to make me feel better? All this inner monologue. I sound crazy as fuck right now. *giggle* maybe I am.

Fuck it. Let’s post it. If anyone thinks I should keep going... with the story. I will. Fuck it . I will anyway .

Here goes nothing.

[thebiggaylion]

Eric Prydz @ EDC Orlando 2015

Hello again, everyone!  Orlando is still here!  I say that because of Hurricane Irma, having just came through between last week’s #ThrowbackThursday and today.  I haven’t been over by Tinker Field yet to make sure it’s still intact, but considering the baseball diamond was taken down, and all that’s over there is a few walking paths and maybe some light posts, I don’t anticipate any “real” damage.  Whatever it may have, I’m sure things will be ready for November!  Speaking of storm-related incidents, you may notice this is being posted on Friday, not Thursday... well, that’s because the guy who’s behind The Big Gay Lion lost power yesterday during a storm.  Not really related to Irma, but I’m sure the power lines and such around where he lives must be a bit strained heh.  Power outages aren’t really interesting, BUT I wasn’t smart about saving this post frequently like I normally am... and I lost it all haha, so I had to start over today!  Maybe I should call this one #FlashbackFriday?  Also, this one's got a lot of videos, so it's gonna have to be a two-part post!  Catch part one and part two if you need to give your hardware a break.

I’ve been looking forward to attending an Eric Prydz show for a while, but I’ll be honest:  I didn’t anticipate it being in a festival setting.  I like getting a little (read:  A LOT) turnt at EDC Orlando, and his flavor of house didn’t strike me as “perfect” for this venue, let alone Kinetic Field (even though, yes, he is house, and that’s where house lives at EDC).  However, I wasn’t disappointed by any means!  The only part of the performance that was disappointing was this thoroughly obnoxious person who pushed up next to me and kept swaying back and forth, bumping into me repeatedly and being otherwise distracting.  Sure, PLUR and all, and I get that... but don’t be a nuisance, man!  Anyway, if you see my camera jerk, it’s because dude (on my right) hit my arm--again.  If you hear any vocalizations that clearly aren’t coming from the speakers, that’s also probably him, too haha.

YouTube | Facebook | Instagram What a great song to dust off and play a mix/cover of!  There was lots of underwater-esque visuals during his set, for the Empire of the Sea interstitial had just played before his set.  Those bubble chains and tentacles are something that stuck with me whenever I reminisce about this performance. Matt Samuels feat. For The Masses - Enjoy The Silence https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fKr4zf9Z92I

YouTube | Facebook | Instagram These visuals stick out a lot for me, too.  Insomniac knows how to theme their CGI, for sure.  In what was one of the only easily recognizable drops in the whole performance, the techs were ready to accent it properly! Popof - Serenity (Noob Remix) https://soundcloud.com/form-music/popof-serenity-noob-remix-6-years-of-form-music-2009-2015

YouTube | Facebook | Instagram I managed to catch a lot of special effects in these videos, it seems!  I also noticed that all of these videos make it seem I’m much closer than I actually am heh.  I’m probably 50 feet or so from the front rails, FYI.  Also, apparently this track is unreleased, so forgive the “who is that guy?” link below haha Cirez D - Metropolitan (ID) https://soundcloud.com/gustav-granath/cirez-d-metropolitan-id

YouTube | Facebook | Instagram R.I.P. Vine.  Man, I do love me some lasers, don’t I?  A flood of classic green lasers like these above will surely hold my attention during any performance. Dusty Kid - Tsunamy https://soundcloud.com/juju-hardstyle/dusty-kid-tsunamy

YouTube | Facebook | Instagram I do like it when an artist brings their own visuals, but sometimes if Insomniac is given free reign on what to display, it comes together much more cohesively, don’t ya think?  Empire of the Sea indeed! Dusty Kid - Tsunamy https://soundcloud.com/juju-hardstyle/dusty-kid-tsunamy

Download High Res (37.2 MB) | Download Low Res (5.5 MB) You know, you don’t see enough dancing performers at EDC Orlando, I think.  Usually whenever you see them, there’s a handful of them strewn across the stages, but it always feels pretty sparse.  Maybe it’s my old expectations from the Electric Daisy Carnival Experience documentary from almost 10 years ago (heavy rounding, obviously!), but I think we could do with another 2-4 dancers per appearance.  What do you think?

YouTube | Facebook | Instagram Here’s a good example of Mr. Obnoxious that was standing next to me lol.  I wish I had a clip of this song that didn’t include his flourishes, but alas! Eric Prydz - Power Drive https://soundcloud.com/eric-prydz/pryda-power-drive-released-01

YouTube | Facebook | Instagram Mr. Obnoxious had been attempting to yell up to Eric Prydz the name of this song title for most of the performance.  I suppose he thought that dude was up there TAKING REQUESTS, or that there was some universe in which he wouldn’t play one of his biggest tracks at the moment in his festival set.  PLUR, I know, I know, PLUR.  One can be annoyed and still be PLUR, as long as they don’t perpetuate it, right?  At least this clip didn’t include any karaoke haha Eric Prydz - Generate https://soundcloud.com/eric-prydz/eric-prydz-generate-out-13th-april

YouTube | Facebook | Instagram And here’s his other hot-at-the-moment track!  This was pre-release, but obviously SiriusXM (and the internet at-large) was all over this track before it (and later, the album of the same name) came out in early 2016. Eric Prydz - Opus https://soundcloud.com/eric-prydz/eric-prydz-opus

Download High Res (46.2 MB) | Download Low Res (6.7 MB) It’s awesome how a simple projection can make the Crystal Village’s Night Owl go from crystalline to more of a topiary!  This was right at the finale of the set, and what a great set it was!

I figured this set was about as close to a neonGARDEN performance as I would get (which obviously turned out to be false).  Yes, I know that venue doesn’t typically feature house music (with notable exceptions), but still!  Also, don’t forget, this post will be broken up into a two-parter, due to the number of videos!  Check out part one here and part two over here!  Love ya’ll, see ya next time! 🏳️‍🌈🦁❤

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