#lljc

[odb--killabeez]

Last night I dreamt my brother. It was 2008 again, we were back in our childhood home on Civic center and Cheyenne. I was laying on the floor watching TV and as I look up behind me I see my brother . 6 years old again, sitting quiet but with so much sadness in his eyes and maybe anxiety, he kept moving his hand and one leg back and forth .

In my dream I remember extending my arm out, I rub his leg and ask him if he's okay and he doesn't say anything, just looks into my eyes at the verge of tears but does not cry. I ask him, are you sad? and he just nods his head no, as he continues to move anxiously with so much sadness in his eyes.

Now I am awake, and just now realized that this was his childhood and we did not notice him . Just a little boy, alone, full of sadness and anxiety and no one knew because no one asked or bothered to pay attention to him. I am so heartbroken. So hurt. I could have been more loving to my little brother . I could have played with him , I could have hugged him and kissed him and told him I loved him . I could have showed him that he wasn't alone .

We all could have .

[yfnlos-blog]

I will never forget about you bro family forever family first long live Justin Carr #brothers4ever❤ longlivejustincarr #lljc #longlivejustincarr @longlivejustincarr #neverforgotten #memories #missingyou #wishyouwashere love you bra #frfr #realcharlottehero #justincarr #mybrotherskeeper #charlottenc #rip #todvilleroad #westsidecharlotte #neverstopnevergiveup #yfnlos #whatistandfor (at Charlotte, North Carolina)

[itz-visco]

LLJC, met you only once but you were cool bro have fun burning in heaven 🙏

[gisellemazer]

#sextou 🍺🍺🍺 (em Ribeirão Preto) https://www.instagram.com/p/CbRAcL-Lljc/?utm_medium=tumblr

[thismademydaynl]

Wij zitten vanavond lekker op de bank. Om naar een nieuwe aflevering van ‘Wie is de Mol? te kijken. Althans ik met de ziekenboeg. Wat ga jij vanavond doen? - - - - #televisie #bankhangen #widm #cat #catoftheday #catofinstagram #caststagram #relaxed #ziekenboeg #cat #kat #katten #weekend #dayoff #television #tvblog #bloggen #dutch #dutchblogger #thenetherlands #dutchblog #entertainment #blognl #EBlogger #wordpress #Nederlands #Nederlandseblogger #maleblogger #blogpromotion #apeldoorn (bij Apeldoorn) https://www.instagram.com/p/Bt887x-lLJC/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1k4lius0bvmu4

[billhaderismycriterioncollection]

Bill Hader gives epic high-fives.

[odb--killabeez]

Tomorrow it’s exactly 10 months without you 💔

[odb--killabeez]

Just getting off work , Now chillin with my brother💙

The peace i feel when I’m here though , I just can’t explain it but it brings me here every single morning.

I LOVE YOU I MISS YOU

[odb--killabeez]

Our guardian angel 💙 I love you and miss you so much !!! I’m looking forward to the day I get to be by your side ! In the meantime , I want to ask you to never leave our side .I wanna thank you for always watching over us and making sure we’re alright . I might have realized a lot of things a little too late , but I’m awake now ! I’m going to make you proud , you are my strength through everything John . 💙

[odb--killabeez]

Today was dope 🎨🍻

[odb--killabeez]

6 months today... life hasn’t been the same without you and it’ll never be . Until we meet again my angel 💙

[odb--killabeez]

I couldn’t believe the amount of love I received at work today . I had two drivers cry when they saw me , 😭❤️ and every single one of them would hug me , all happy because I’m back . My manager even had our supervisor take me aside and ask me if I would like to be the lead on day shift , now that Really was unbelievable to me lol it’s my first day back after 8 months and He already wants to promote me ?!

What is going on ?!? 😭

[odb--killabeez]

I love coming to visit my brother with my family . It feels like we’re complete just being there at his grave .

[odb--killabeez]

My brother came and laid next to me , hugged me and smiled at me💙 it was beautiful!! Idk if I was dreaming or not , I remember looking at him and telling my self he’s here and I’m not sleeping! I felt so happy and peaceful, his face looked like it did at the hospital but less swollen and I smelled him too!

He smiled at me the whole time until I watched him disappear

Thank you John for coming to see me and for the hug I needed very much from you , I love you so much! The only thing that keeps me going is knowing I’ll be with you again someday💙

[odb--killabeez]

I was just remembering how yesterday while visiting my brother , I was sitting next to his grave , I had just gotten off my phone , I locked it and set it besides me . Then all of a sudden it somehow unlocks its self , opens the SoundCloud app and plays my brothers rap he had recorded. I freaked out for a minute, but then I knew that was my brother 💙

[odb--killabeez]

5 months ago today since you went away . The pain grows which each day that goes by .. I miss you more and I feel worse. Not a day goes by that I don’t think of you 💙 Don’t forget about me . Please watch over me . I miss you 😢