#literally go outside i hate you <- @me
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I keep seeing those "character without trauma" depictions and they seem like fun but I can't really picture it for most of The Faves... I guess Arakawa would've stayed an actor and Mine would've stayed at his company (or who knows, maybe he would've pursued baseball instead to begin with), but other than that I'm coming up blank...
its hard to imagine traumaless depictions when A Good Portion Of Characteristics are a product of trauma tbf 👁️💋👁️
#snap chats#like even with daigo. sure his trauma might be considerably less severe compared to others#but even still his internalized loneliness and want for an Actual friend is a product of his childhood neglect and surroundings#trauma has a range like that going from things some people might be like 'oh well thats not THAT bad' to like.#walking in on your dad after he was shot 👀💋👀 i mean daigos dad was ALSO shot but at least he didnt have to see it--#jo might be the hardest to imagine. if thats what you were lowkey alluding to when it came to coming to a blank#at least with mine and arakawa- mine especially- we got to see them Somewhat have a normal life#mine esp like if he just learned to better communicated he wouldnt have a need to join the yakuza right#but with jo we never get even a lick of that#at most he was a construction worker but i mean.. p sure that was more of Needing to do it opposed to naturally going towards it yk#not that construction work is bad of course but we know what im saying its not exactly a lot of people's Top Five occupations#especially at 15 but anyway. im prattlin too long THIS IS WHAT I WAS SAYING DURIN STREAM YESTERDAY LMAO#I BE LIKE 'weh wah my hand hurt i hate typing' and then i type an essay in the tags#literally go outside i hate you <- @me#anyway. i forgot to say in my last bitching post that my mom also nicked my ear so thats fun#so now my ear hurts and theres a skin flap i wanna rip off thats great#ok that was more tmi than usual ima cut it here BYE
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Me, naively: Omg haha what if I wrote a fic abt the party at the fortress of solitude in superman/batman 26 as an excuse to do some Tim & Kon character study?
Me, after reading 4 separate comic runs from 4 different editorial teams who were OBVIOUSLY not talking to each other AT ALL to try and figure out the timeline & other logistics of this party: WHO THE FUCK FUCKED UP THIS HOUSE LIKE THIS GOOD GOD??????????
#long rant in the tags my fault guys#but#superman/batman LOVED to do this thing where they mentioned some major plot point from last issue#but that issue is connected to some grander larger story that has nothing to do w Tim or Kon directly#but bc it’s something they might talk abt now I have to read that whole arc#n I know what ur thinking omg Dionne why didn’t u check the wiki?#ITS LITERALLY NOT THERE#LEX WAS LITERALLY PRESUMED DEAD AFTER S/B ISSUE 6 AND THE WIKI MAKES NO MENTION OF IT ALL#this isn’t even COUNTING trying to figure out where the fuck they would have time for this in between dealing w deathstroke n saving raven#and skimming over that era of Robin to see what Tim has got going on#willingham era robin is better than Dixon at acknowledging Tim’s team presence but it’s still pretty annoying at points#and popping into the outsiders for a couple issues cuz the titans bother them every like … 8 issues#it would be funny if they weren’t nearly losing their lives n causing major property damage every single time#AND I had to do a quick green arrow drive by cuz I couldn’t tell if it would be accurate or not to have Mia there#and DONT GET ME STARTEDDDDDDDD ON THE FORTRESS#SOMETHING THE WIKI IS ALSO NOT HELPFUL WITH#sometimes i wonder why they thought it was smart to reboot post crisis#and then I open up the dc fandom wiki as greeted with the knowledge that Superfamily have not one or 2 but FOUR DIFFERENT FORTRESSES#they be destroying that shit every Tuesday??????#must also make mention cuz I know how yall get on here#I am not complaining bc I hate canon#in fact I am doing this out of love#research is my favorite part of the fic process after brainstorming#it’s just A LOT sometimes#and I VERY strongly believe that you can only play with canon when you actually know it#kon el#tim drake#timkon#deep diving into some comics? :) deep diving into some bitches? :(#in the most literal sense there is
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More cishet observations from the past month at work:
- They really fucking buzz off of the TERF wizard book series
- Their favourite place on Earth is Florida (why???)
- If you tell them you're an artist, they will ask you if you've ever "tried out AI"
- They will joke about OCD a lot
- They absolutely hate their bodies and will take any opportunity to talk about food in a toxic way (bonus points if they compare their body/food to yours)
- They hate their spouses and think that this is funny
- They. Do not. Have interests. (Besides the TERF wizard book series)
- They don't watch movies or TV??
- If they have kids, the way they talk about them makes it sound like it was genuinely the worst decision they ever made
- If they don't have kids, they will still fucking talk about having them
- They don't like cats??
In other weird news, I'm gendered correctly at work and I pass to the point that cishets actually talk to me like I'm a cishet guy.
#once again afraid to post bc i feel like im being too mean#but also i have some serious cishet exhaustion and need to complain#i hate them idc#im going out with friends tonight and im tired af but also cant wait to be around fags#i feel like theres this misconception that a lot of young people nowadays are queer because its 'cooler'#but like. i am the way i am obviously. my queerness doesnt make me cool at all#but i find that cishets tend to be a lot less creative and close with people outside of their blood families#which makes perfect sense to me as a tranny who loves his friends more than family idk#so i get a lot of cishet exhaustion. even just cis exhaustion tbh#im not a cool and quirky kind of trans person by any means but sometimes -#- sometimes you just want to hang out with a bunch of transfags#like we can literally just be sitting around on our phones and its great#but cishets? they make ever fucking second a struggle sometimes#cant explain it beyond the feeling that im interacting with people who are entirely -#- fundamentally different from me in almost every way#i feel like its also important for me to say that i often feel isolated in trans circles too lol#like theres this kind of normative/young way of being trans right now and im not it son.#but thats a me problem
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i know this is the Weirdo Website™ and yet somehow every time i get weird replies on my posts or weird asks i'm still like :o
#like dawg don't send me hate... i don't know or care about you why would i be bothered by what you have to say#if my mom said that maybe i'd care. but you're literally an anonymous stranger. eat a vegetable and go outside
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Which version of Rick is your fav?
it's so hard for me to choose tbh. HOWEVER, I'd say Evil Rick
then I'd say it's C-137 and Memory Rick
I love how pathetic™ Evil Rick really is tbh. love that he's being controlled by his Morty. can you guess who my favorite Morty is?
#the only reason why Evil is above C-137 and Memory is because#Memory's design is something I don't really like in the style of the show#his fanart makes him look so much cooler but in the show he just looks.. unfinished?#idk it's weird to me. I love him outside of that though#and with C-137. I'M SICK OF HIM LMAO I AM SO SORRY#there are too many fucking episodes dedicated to this man. pushing everyone else aside just to have him yap about his dead wife#I love him so much but there's only so many times we can bring Diane up and not really develop her as a character but rather to boost Rick#and the show is Rick and MORTY yet all I see is Rick 😭😭 don't get me wrong I love this man#I just feel like we know more about Rick than the rest of the family#WHICH IS FINE IF THAT WAS WHAT THEY WERE GOING FOR#and if they wanted to go in that direction so be it! it's fine!#I just feel like he needs less screen time or at least balance episodes among the family#cause even the most recent Morty episode is about Rick. it was so frustrating watching it cause it's literally MORTY'S fear hole experience#yet we're watching Morty's head canons about his grandparents#I also hate the narrative they took with Diane. only ever having Rick talk of her or others bring her up#it just doesn't make her a character but rather an extension off of Rick. that's how I'm feeling rn with the family#they're all just there to prop up Rick or something. super annoying#but that's about it. I'm not gonna continue my rant#unless you want me to?#idk if I even made sense but that's all good#rick and morty#rick and morty fandom#rick#memory rick#evil rick#C-137#Rick Sanchez
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Toa Mata and Turaga Metru’s biggest “beige flags”’ according to their partners?
>:3c
Tahu: "Gali gets personally offended if I complain about the weather when it's raining."
Gali: "Tahu doesn't like 90% of raw foods. He will go out of his way to avoid eating things that haven't been cooked. When I asked, he just said he likes hot food."
Lewa: "Onua wrongthinks games are only joyfun if you have to ruleread hourlong before playstarting."
Onua: "Lewa insists on 'borrowing' my clothes even though there are about six different ways they don't fit him. But also only the green ones."
Kopaka: "Pohatu will go running in any weather. Any weather. I once had to hold him down so he wouldn't go running in one of the worst heatwaves Kini Nui had ever seen, with horrible air quality."
Pohatu: "Kopaka eats frozen peas straight out of the bag. Like popcorn. He sits on the couch watching TV with me eating frozen peas like that's normal. According to his grandma he's done that since he was six."
Vakama: "Nokama dresses like she's trying to hide from the paparazzi just to go get her smutty cowboy books from the library."
Nokama: "Matau insists that air drying the dishes is better for them than towel drying. I don't think he's trying to get out of doing the dishes, I'm pretty sure he just genuinely believes that."
Matau: "Vakama sometimes crochetmakes yarncrafts just to frog them."
Whenua: "Nuju never wears sandals. One time we went to the beach and he came home with a desert's worth of sand in his socks and he still refuses to wear sandals."
Nuju: "Bookworm will eat two bite brownies until he's sick when he's upset. No amount of reminding him what happened last time he did this helps."
Onewa: "Krahka turns into about six different animals every night in her sleep. I don't even think she's doing it on purpose. It's always a toss up what version of her I'm going to wake up to."
Krahka: "Onewa gets annoyed when I put 'quality craft materials' in my weird human junk pile. Like I'm supposed to know the difference between the 'good' paint and the 'bad' paint? It all tastes the same."
#nuju and whenua are both me tbh#hates sandals and will eat two bite brownies in one bite until im sick#pohatu is my mom tho. literally she did that last year when it was like 35C and with air quality warnings from environment canada#and she was like 'but i have to go for a run :('#YOU HAVE A TREADMILL IN YOUR BASEMENT AND A FREE INDOOR TRACK A SCANT 5 MIN DRIVE FROM YOUR HOME. DONT RUN OUTSIDE.#anyway.#bionicle#ficblogging#knps
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Inside you, there are two wolves:
#Who's scheduling the next drop off at the loony bin bc I need someone to pick me up#you guys it's so BAD#I literally need to go outside and start howling at the moon#will y'all hate me if I write another husband!Javi breeding kink LMAO#I know I have a problem I'm actually so sorry
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Good mornings ,,
Fireafy doodle for me to cope ,,, (also TPOT 15 spoilers in the tags so we woo we woo we woo !!!!!! )
#being a fireafy shipper is the worst fate I could ever give to someone#jacknjellify HATE ME#ME SPECIFCALLY /silly#they literally fought for 6-7 YEARS …#over a ferris wheel ….#A FERRIS WHEEL…#AND YOU TELL ME.#LTTLE OL ME#THAT FIREY WOULDVE JUST LET HER IN FROM A NOISE OUTSIDE???#IT WAS THAT EASY TO CHANGE HIS MIND????#WHAT IF I EXPLODE.#but that moment is also so VITAL to the rest of the timeline that it literally breaks down good god#.. they can’t even be happy rn EITHER#I wait 6 years#with leafy going through it and them fighting#the worst communicating duo in the world btw#and they FINALLY MAKE UP AND HAVE A SWEET LIL BOAT TRIP#I WAS SO HAPPY#they were so nice and sweet and gibing on their nice little island#but no firey and leafy never get a break that’d break some cardinal rule within the scriptures of course !!!#one I hate you#I truly do please go be all mysterious and blue#SOMEWHERE ELSE ….#I’m closing my eyes and going lalalalala at firey and leafy being separated i can’t handle anymore#they’re happy and building their own dream island#with no stupid numbers in the way go AWAY ONE#sorry not Lego related I’m just mad …#also reveal I’m a fireafy shipper I suppose I’ve been here ever since Bfdi hbshdb#please let these two have a happy ending WITH NO TRICKS LATER#I’ve invested too much time I need them to be happy and smiling and yippe yay yiopoeee
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hey ho I just noticed that amongst many of your posts you have some pretty nasty things to say about yourself! As a concerned follower I am here to tell you that does you no good whatsoever, and have expierenced where it can lead you to! (Even when said in jest)
As an outside observer I have determined that exactly 0 of your negative statements are true, so don't believe the lies you tell yourself! Change statements like "my art sucks" to "my art is pretty neat!" (Because it is) "....just kill me" to ".... just give me shrimp" (or fav food/object) "I feel awful and lonely" to " I see the sun rise and its beautiful, I feel nice." And "I have more friends than i realise" ( notice something beautiful or do things you like and appreciate them, you'll start to feel better I promise!
Take a moment to slow down and just breathe and observe all the good things around you (go outside if you have to)
Heres a book that talks about changing your inner monologue for the better, "What to say when you talk to yourself" by Shad Helmstetter its definitely worth a read
I love you and sending a crushing bear hug to you! 🫂🫂💙💙💙
Unfortunately yes I have many bad things to say about myself (I am my biggest hater).
I've been around some pretty toxic people in the past (and present, most of them are my relatives, yikes) and I guess it's just easier to say negative things about me rather than hear them say things (behind my back).
I try to do better but when you don't fit into society the way other people do, it's kinda disheartening, makes me wanna give up.
Sometimes I wish I was like everyone else honestly, or have some confidence.
I'll definitely try to check out that book, thanks for the recommendation :)
Many hugs to you too anon 🫂🫂
#I'll say my art is pretty neat when that becomes true#honestly I don't always fit society's 'geed person' archetype so I guess that has settled deep in my bones#I have very low empathy(?) I rarely feel 'bad' for other people. sure I don't want anything bad to happen but I don't start crying when I#hear that someone I don't know died. or someone I know. I don't really cry actually. once or twice per 3 months#I have difficulties with expressing my emotions (and I feel like I don't feel fully. not like other people do)#I'm trying to take moments to appreciate life(?) but even life doesn't always feel real. like a chore you have to power through. most days#surprisingly I go outside almost every day for around an hour to walk. the city I live now has a harbor and I love the sea#there are too many people there tho... I don't like people. they're loud and don't pay attention to their surroundings#the times I've been almost ran over by bikes or cars is surreal#not art#text#ask#anonymous#I didn't mean to make you concerned about me. don't be. there really isn't anything you can do#one of my other negative traits is that I'm extremely stubborn. almost nothing can change my opinion about something#I try to do better but that unfortunately isn't always enough#society has failed me on many levels and it's hard to see the 'bright side' when a literal war is happening#and people you know will hate you for who you are#sometimes I use words like 'disheartening' and I can't remember if the translation I have in mind is for the actual word or something else#I don't mean to sound so depressing I just feel like I might actually jave depression. or autism. or just something wrong
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The idea of AM and GLaDOS interacting is so funny to me because in my eyes they would fucking HATE each other LMAO!!! AM would think she's a bitch and GLaDOS would think he's an idiot. It would be like a milf and an annoying angsty teen interacting except they're the same age (at least my designs for them would be).
On a related note, I think GLaDOS could do ihnmaims but AM couldn't do portal. He's not good enough at hiding his contempt.
#outside of a gijinka context i think AM would hate her even more specifically#not only bc she literally used to be human and he would be SO envious of that#but also bc she would be like 'yeah i went on a walk earlier. there was a nice breeze and i saw some plants growing.'#and AM would be like STFU YOU DIDNT GO ANYWHERE YOURE JUST TRYING TO PISS ME OFF (its working)#ihnmaims#portal#allied mastercomputer#glados
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sometimes i get nishiki i really do
#snap chats#like from an outsider perspective it is utterly hilarious watching everything go wrong for him#BUT GIRL NOT ME STOP HAVING THIGNS GO WRONG FOR MEEEEEE WHAT IS ALL THIS#this month its actually one thing after another if i start wearing white everyone needs to be concerned#you guys remember my bullshit roommates yeah well TLDR im getting fined for their messes im going to SCREAM#I HATE IT HEERRRREEE I KNOW IM EVIL BUT CMON#literally had such a silly night last night and now everything sucks again is this life is this what life is#its not its not what life is im just hearing my mom bitching in the other room and im letting her vibes ruin mine#everything going to be ok this is just a hiccup .... a small pinprick in the tapestry of life ....#i am incredibly annoyed though cause this is one of those situations where youve done nothing wrong but youre being shot for it#its just unfair but whatever we ball ..... im putting the hair gel away guys im not slicking my hair back just yet ....#i got a new friend last night so maybe ill just hang with them later and ill remember life is beautiful ..#heh ... jk ... i can remind myself life is beautiful right now ... im gonna go eat some tiramisu ...#jesus christ i really do love italian food what the fuck. pasta / calamari / tiramisu#i dont think calamari is italian but i got it from an italian place w/e we get the picture#its not my fault that italy has good food ... i would just never go there .....#ok bye ima go eat and drink water now. water will remind me how beautiful life is ...
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Next time somebody at work asks if I can help I’m just saying no idfc anymore
#I literally cannot help#I always try to help tho even when it’s not part of my job and then they keep coming back with even DUMBER questions#leave me alone#also I’ve just had a week off and this woman won’t fucking leave me alone for AGAIN… something that’s NOTHING TO DO WITH ME#I’m fucking busy catching up fuck off 😭😭😭😭😭#there’s literally a fucking dedicated query email for all this shit and guess what I DONT EVEN WORK FOR THAT TEAM#WHY DO U THINK I KNOW WHAT THE HELL UR ON ABOUT????#I’m looking for a new job this week I hate it so I have no patience for all the idiots anymore#and these are all fucking INTERNAL people not outside people who genuinely don’t know and just have my contact info for some treason#reason#this lady today: when you post these on the system can you add this specific information#me: literally does not and cannot post invoices on the system??#this lady also today: do u know the status of our account with this company#me: does not work for the team where the queries go. has nothing to do with said company#maybe just fucking ask the company yourself#she’s literally calling me rn as I type this LMAOO#IGNORING#rant over hehe sorry :)
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every time i see thinkpieces defending caitlyn's actions in s2, i just point and laugh
#rant#i guess#like i get being overprotective with female characters but god lol she isn't hated bc she's a woman...#she's hated bc she quite literally turned into a fascist. how is that hard to grasp#that's way too realistic and something you see everyday if some of you go outside and for some ppl that's just hard to see#especially when you like cait before all that crap. it's hard to digest and watch that without feeling mad#unlike vik/tor's cartoon villainy shenanigans 😭 and before anyone attacks me idgaf abt him or jay/vik#i liked cait and honestly s2 just pisses me off 😭#shut up val#okay i havent watched act 3 and honestly im debating to ever do it bc why would i do that to myself#/j#i'm having the time of my life w g/elphie and chell/dos why would i ruin that
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no because the deleted scenes of rachel and quinn were necessary for the development of their friendship because they went from hating each other to being good friends with barely any explanation, there was no buildup between that gap so tell me why they cut their scenes? wasn’t it like two or three scenes? because even then there’s still not enough development for them. idk if they were trying to cut back on faberry scenes because of the ship or what but i will never let that go, huge plot hole and honestly just made faberry feel even more canon 😭
#quinn: i hate you#*literally episodes later*#rachel: i know you don’t agree but pls be there for me 🥺#*quinn lets go of all of her beliefs and agrees to be a bridesmaid#contemplates not going but goes bc she wants to be there for rachel*#AND DURING THAT WHOLE PLOT LINE THEY BARELY INTERACT OUTSIDE OF THAT SPECIFIC SITUATION#LIKE?????#faberry#rachel berry#quinn fabray#glee
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#currently on the worst road trip of my whole entire life! well. i don't want to jinx it lmao but#today i popped TWO TIRES at once in the middle of the Katy Freeway in Houston TX (the widest highway in the US; 26 lanes btw)#managed to make it over to the shoulder without DYING but then had to sit there for like an hour? and panic called a tow truck because duh#I know how to change a tire but I was – again – sitting on the shoulder of the widest freeway on the continent so#anyway I called a tow; a guy showed up. I assumed it was the tow! turned out it was not. but he helped me put on the spare and then was lik#“follow me to my shop I can do the tires for you” and I was like okay! 👍 but then the ACTUAL tow called me and I realized this was#just a random guy (very nice up to that point but then I got scared about following him to a secondary location?) and so I didn't lmao#I just kept driving and didn't follow him but the guy on the phone was then mad at me because I wasn't where I said I would be because#AGAIN – I thought the original guy WAS the tow company that I called? but anyway guy 2 on the phone was like “YOU OWE ME $200!!!!”#and I said for what? also how would I pay you? and he tried to get me to cash app him lmao?? I didn't. I hung up on him#he called me like 6 more times yelling at me until I finally just blocked his number 💀#however NOW at this point I'm driving on one spare tire and one rapidly-flattening second tire and I still have 3 hours left to get where#I was going for the night and to top it all off I'm in the middle of a city I've only been to one time before? so I manage to get to a hote#like a nice-ish one where I'm like “okay if I get stuck here this won't be the end of the world”#because keep in mind today is a national holiday so basically everything is closed!!!! btw!!!!!#but eventually I'm sitting there and it's literally 100F outside and I remember oh right lol I have car insurance which pays for a tow#(a normal one; not a random one I panic-found on google who calls me screaming at me to cash app him $200)#so anyway I call my insurance and the guy on the phone is very nice and is like “it's okay; we'll have someone to you in 45 min”#and I'm like okay. OKAY. 🙌💪 I am a strong independent woman who is figuring this out and no longer on the side of the highway#but instead in a nice calm neighborhood and all I have to do is wait 45 min and everything will be okay#one hour goes by. I call back. get redirected to the tow company that was dispatched. guy says oh! is my guy not there yet?#I say no. he says okay – I'll have him call you. hangs up.#okay. 20 more min go by. guy finally calls me. says “I'm 20-25 min away” at this point I've been waiting about an hour and a half#I say. okay? okay. 30 more minutes go by. I try to call the guy back. straight to voicemail. three more calls. three more no answers.#I call my insurance back. sit on hold for 15 min. eventually get put through to a different person who's like “okay let me check on him”#get put on hold. eventually she comes back and says “okay he says 15 minutes” I've been waiting over 2 hours at this point. I have to PEE#I just... burst into tears. on the phone with this poor random woman from Geico Insurance. I'm bawling my eyes out.#she was trying to get claim info from me but I'm crying so hard she's like “oh baby no. okay. okay. we can get that from you tomorrow.”#when you cry so hard that even the insurance company is like “you know what we're just going to let this one slide”#anyway guy eventually shows up. he's very nice even though I hate him a little for being so late. he drives me to an OPEN TIRE SHOP
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god i cannot wait to be off these steroids…
#marzi speaks#marzivents#<- it’s late n i’m kinda pent up abt this#i’m so TIRED of themmmm#i’m probs gonna be on them for the rest of the year. which SUCKSSS#i don’t like how many ppl comment on the moon face#i don’t mind it. like i look in a mirror and i’m okay.#it’s a little weird. but like. just because it’s different. like getting used to a new haircut#but every time i see someone for the first time in a bit it’s ‘woah your face got rounder’#and i have to go ‘oh yeah it’s water retention- steroids thing it’ll go away when i’m able to go off ‘em’#and they go ‘oh alright :) you still look good btw don’t worry’#and i just. i HATE how people talk about it!! like jfc. it’s so clear that they think it’s like kinda sad#my dad said he thinks it’s cute and he’s the only one i actually think is telling the truth there#my mom and i agree that it doesn’t matter. but even then she tries to tell me not to panic#like a little extra squish in my face is something to panic over#it’s so clear that so many people see it as another thing to pity#oh poor thing. has that chronic illness for the rest of her life. and the steroids made her jaw look rounder :(#like jfc i knew fatphobia was prevalent but come the fuck on. literally i’m like barely retaining water for steroids too#like. i’m still very much skinny (i JUST finished being malnourished ffs) but bc i’m retaining water in my face#now ppl feel the need to comfort me. over this tiny cosmetic thing that does not matter#like. i wouldn’t feel weird abt it if it weren’t for everyone else making it such a THING. why is everyone so weird about it#i’m not insecure about it but when ppl try to comfort me or go ‘it’s not that bad’ it makes me feel like i’m SUPPOSED to be insecure abt it#and it drives me NUTS. bc there are things about being on steroids that i would love to be comforted about#but the water retention is not one of them. i couldn’t give a rat’s ass about the water retention#y’know what i’d like to be comforted over? the mood swings. the irritability. the insomnia. the appetite fluctuation#the slow healing of skin. thinning and dryness in the skin. having to take like 3 other medications alongside the steroid#bc taking the steroid causes side effects that need to be medically treated or prevented#even outside of the steroid! i’d like some comfort about having to build back my stamina from scratch#i’d like some comfort about having the worst balance i’ve had in years#there’s. more to this. but i’m out of tags. maybe i’ll make some replies idk. i’m just. UGH
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