#literal highlight of my day
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In my Zeus bag today so I'm just gonna put it out there that exactly none of the great Ancient Greek warrior-heroes stayed loyal and faithful and completely monogamous and yet none of them have their greatness questioned nor do we question why they had the cultural prominence that they did and still do.
Jason, the brilliant leader of the Argo, got cold feet when it came to Medea - already put off by some of her magic and then exiled from his birthland because of her political ploys, he took Creusa to bed and fully intended on marrying her despite not properly dissolving things with Medea.
Theseus was a fierce warrior and an incredibly talented king but he had a horrible temper and was almost fatally weak to women. This is the man who got imprisoned in the Underworld for trying to get a friend laid, the man who started the whole Attic War because he couldn't keep his legs closed.
And we cannot at all forget Heracles for whom a not inconsiderable amount of his joy in life was loving people then losing the people around him that he loved. Wives, children, serving boys, mentors, Heracles had a list of lovers - male and female - long enough to rival some gods and even after completing his labours and coming down to the end of his life, he did not have one wife but three.
And y'know what, just because he's a cultural darling, I'll put Achilles up here too because that man was a Theseus type where he was fantastic at the thing he was born to do (that is, fight whereas Theseus' was to rule) but that was not enough to eclipse his horrid temper and his weakness to young pretty things. This is the man that killed two of Apollo's sons because they wouldn't let him hit - Tenes because he refused to let Achilles have his sister and Troilus who refused Achilles so vehemently that he ran into Apollo's temple to avoid him and still couldn't escape.
All four of these men are still celebrated as great heroes and men. All four of these men are given the dignity of nuance, of having their flaws treated as just that, flaws which enrich their character and can be used to discuss the wider cultural point of what truly makes a hero heroic. All four of these men still have their legacies respected.
Why can that same mindset not be applied to Zeus? Zeus, who was a warrior-king raised in seclusion apart from his family. Zeus who must have learned to embrace the violence of thunder for every time he cried as a babe, the Corybantes would bang their shields to hide the sound. Zeus learned to be great because being good would not see the universe's affairs in its order.
The wonderful thing about sympathy is that we never run out of it. There's no rule stopping us from being sympathetic to multiple plights at once, there's no law that necessitate things always exist on the good-evil binary. Yes, Zeus sentenced Prometheus to sufferation in Tartarus for what (to us) seems like a cruel reason. Prometheus only wanted to help humans! But when you think about Prometheus' actions from a king's perspective, the narrative is completely different: Prometheus stole divine knowledge and gifted it to humans after Zeus explicitly told him not to. And this was after Prometheus cheated all the gods out of a huge portion of wealth by having humans keep the best part of a sacrifice's meat while the gods must delight themselves with bones, fat and skin. Yes, Zeus gave Persephone away to Hades without consulting Demeter but what king consults a woman who is not his wife about the arrangement of his daughter's marriage to another king? Yes, Zeus breaks the marriage vows he set with Hera despite his love of her but what is the Master of Fate if not its staunchest slave?
The nuance is there. Even in his most bizarre actions, the nuance and logic and reason is there. The Ancient Greeks weren't a daft people, they worshipped Zeus as their primary god for a reason and they did not associate him with half the vices modern audiences take issue with. Zeus was a father, a visitor, a protector, a fair judge of character, a guide for the lost, the arbiter of revenge for those that had been wronged, a pillar of strength for those who needed it and a shield to protect those who made their home among the biting snakes. His children were reflections of him, extensions of his will who acted both as his mercy and as his retribution, his brothers and sisters deferred to him because he was wise as well as powerful. Zeus didn't become king by accident and it is a damn shame he does not get more respect.
#ginger rambles#ginger chats about greek myths#greek mythology#It's Zeus Apologist day actually#For the record Jason is my personal favourite of these guys#The argonauts are extremely underrated for literally no reason#And Jason's wit and sheer ability to adapt along with his piousness are traits that are so far away from what usually gets highlighted#with the typical Greek warrior-hero that I've just never stopped being captivated by him#Conversely I still do not understand what people see in Achilles#I respect him and his legacy I respect the importance of his tale and his cultural importance I promise I do#However I personally can't stand the guy LMAO#How do you get warned twice TWICE both by your mother and by Athena herself that going after Apollo's children is a bad idea#And still have the audacity to be mad and surprised when Apollo is gunning for Specifically You during the war you're bringing to His City#That You Specifically and Exclusively had a choice in avoiding#ACHILLES COULD'VE JUST SAID NO#I know that's not the point however so many other members of the Greek camp were simply casualties of Fate in every conceivable way man#Achilles looked at every terrible choice he could possibly make said “Well I'm gonna die anyway 🤷🏽” and proceeded to make the choice#so hard that he angered god#That's y'all's man right there#I left out Perseus because truthfully I don't actually know much about him#I haven't studied him even a fraction as much as I've studied some of the other big culture heroes and none of this is cited so i don't wan#to talk about stuff I don't know 100%#Anyway justice for Zeus fr#Gimme something give me literally anything other than the nonsense we usually get for him#This goes for Hera too btw#Both the king and queen of the skies are done TERRIBLY by wider greek myth audiences and it's genuinely disheartening to see#If y'all could make excuses for Achilles to forgive his flaws y'all can do it for them#They have a lot more to sympathise with I'll tell you that#(that is a completely biased statement; you are completely free and encouraged to enjoy whichever figures spark joy)#zeus
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Leaving the confines of his bedroom, Law met Luffy at the door, the other man grinning brighter than the afternoon sunlight that haloed him. Something in Law's chest shifted again, the thundering of his heart pushing it free with such a violent force that he felt himself reeling, stunned, as he looked down at Luffy.
Law liked him.
Law liked Luffy.
_
Callunar’s fic, “Broken Heart Syndrome” is my FAVOURITE ongoing lawlu fic and OMFG IT’S SUCH A GOOD SLOWBURN. THE PACING IS IMMACULATE? It’s 80k rn but their relationship development doesn’t feel snail paced, nor does it feel rushed! It’s JUST RIGHT.
#one piece#op fanart#monkey d. luffy#lawlu#trafalgar d. water law#EVERYTIME I SEE AN UPDATE IN MY BOOKMARKS I GO BALLISTIC#LITERALLY THE HIGHLIGHT OF MY DAY!!!#todays chapter actually made me lose my god damn mind im quaking in my boots
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This is where I reblog from
#Pride and Prejudice#Jane Austen#mr darcy#fitzwilliam darcy#love my reblogging sessions#literally often a highlight of my days
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Wild how we know that Elizabeth Woodville was officially appointed to royal councils in her own right during her husband’s reign and fortified the Tower of London in preparation of a siege while 8-months pregnant and had forces gathering at Westminster “in the queen’s name” in 1483 – only for NONE of these things to be even included, let alone explored, in the vast majority of scholarship and historical novels involving her.
#lol I don't remember writing this - I found it when I was searching for something else in my drafts. But it's 100% true so I had to post it.#elizabeth woodville#my post#Imo this is mainly because Elizabeth's negative historiography has always involved both vilification and diminishment in equal measure.#and because her brand of vilification (femme fatale; intriguer) suggests more indirect/“feminine” than legitimate/forceful types of power#It's still bizarre though-you'd think these would be some of the most famous & defining aspects of Elizabeth's life. But apparently not#I guess she only matters when it comes to marrying Edward and Promoting Her Family and scheming against Richard#There is very lacking interest in her beyond those things even in her traditionally negative depictions#And most of her “reassessments” tend to do diminish her so badly she's rendered utterly irrelevant and almost pathetic by the end of it#Even when some of these things *are* mentioned they're never truly emphasized as they should be.#See: her formal appointment in royal councils. It was highly unconventional + entirely unprecedented for queens in the 14th & 15th century#You'd think this would be incredibly important and highlighted when analyzing late medieval queenship in England but apparently not#Historians are more willing to straight-up INVENT positions & roles for so many other late medieval queens/king's mothers that didn't exist#(not getting into this right now it's too long...)#But somehow acknowledging and discussing Elizabeth's ACTUAL formally appointed role is too much for them I guess#She's either subsumed into the general vilification of her family (never mind that they were known as 'the queen's kin' to actual#contemporaries; they were defined by HER not the other way around) or she's rendered utterly insignificant by historians. Often both.#But at the end of the day her individual role and identity often overlooked or downplayed in both scenarios#and ofc I've said this before but - there has literally never been a proper reassessment of Elizabeth's role in 1483-85 TILL DATE#despite the fact that it's such a sensational and well-known time period in medieval England#This isn't even a Wars of the Roses thing. Both Margaret of Anjou and Margaret Beaufort have had multiple different reassessments#of their roles and positions during their respective crises/upheavals by now;#There is simply a distinct lack of interest in reassessing Elizabeth in a similar way and I think this needs to be acknowledged.#Speaking of which - there's also a persistent habit of analyzing her through the context of Margaret of Anjou or Elizabeth of York#(either as a parallel or a foil) rather than as a historical figure in HER OWN RIGHT#that's also too long to get into I just wanted to point it out because I hate it and I think it's utterly senseless#I've so much to say about how all of this affects her portrayal in historical fiction as well but that's going into a whole other tangent#ofc there are other things but these in particular *really* frustrate me#just felt like ranting a bit in the tags because these are all things that I want to individually discuss someday with proper posts...
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my cats held hands for like 10 seconds before marilyn decided to end hazel’s shit
#watching them wrassle is literally a highlight of my day#the pawshake was just top notch#marilyn tag#hazel tag#my cats#cats
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my all time favorite headcanon for jim (+ screencap edit)
#art#fanart#my art#doodle#digital art#treasure planet#treasure planet fanart#jim hawkins#james pleiades hawkins#headcanon#screencap edit#i have posted something similar before. but i really wanted to highlight this specific headcanon i have#its literally my favorite#theres not a day that goes by that i cant imagine him as mixed#mixed as in ‘species mixed’#like how he’s part ursid here?? i love it#ive said it before and ill say it again#i genuinely dont believe he’s 100% human
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Class got canceled so I drew while zoning out to music with the extra free time
#ralsei#deltarune#ms paint#doodles#when my art block hits hard enough sometimes i just need to put the fancy programs away#forget about large projects#and just scribble#i draw the same ralsei over and over and i realize that#but its something i can draw while my brain is being stretched thin in other areas right now#that being said i do try to do something new every time i draw him so i dont get tired of him#i took what i learned from doing maomaos eyes the other day and applied it here#turns out all that you need to fix uncanny anatomical issues is a little perspective... literally#and then the glasses highlights covered all of that fun linework up lmao#haha you'll just have to trust that its under there
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hearing a bunch of hcs about the electric polycule has honestly been the highlight of my day
#literally the highlight of my day#starlight express#stex#stex electra#stex volta#stex joule#stex killerwatt#stex krupp#stex wrench#stex purse#stexblr#elektra the electric engine#wrench the repair truck#volta the freezer truck#purse the money truck#joule the dynamite truck#krupp the armaments truck#stex electric polycule
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my new favourite thing is telling people irl that i use any pronouns and seeing what they do with that information because im visibly butch and have really short hair but also very obviously have bust. the reactions are effervescent
#[ren]#they will literally always say ''she'' and then correct to ''he'' before settling back on ''she'' its genuinely a highlight of my day
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REALLY BAD AND STUPID UNWONDERFUL DAY. does anyone have something fun or interesting they want to show or tell me because I love seeing things and learning fun facts and there is no better time to experience wonderful images and sentences than when you are going HUEHGH.. WEEEGH....
#e.g. favourite pokemon. character you think I might like. fun fact about literally anything at all. highlight from your day. anything kind.#listen to my gibberish boy#boy who is NOT coping with almost no sleep due to an 18 hour long headache!!! and then one billion tiny tragedies!!!!! and fears!#on the bright side I saw a species of endemic butterfly that has apparently been non-existent in my city for the past two decades#which is AMAZING
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no one would notice if i ever vanished // if bodies could sustain // this never-ending army // like blood pumping through a vein
(click for better resolution!)
:OOO hello. anyway since these are all posters i'd have in an ideal world or smth and i'd like to store the high res versions somewhere,,, here's the google drive folder for them? hehe ''
close up!
#adamandi#vincent aurelius lin#i'm back with the posters! or smth! idk!!#i'm maybe just a bit obsessed with vincent. such a Character.#where can i run is sustaining me single-handedly through this exam season (<- has cried thrice in the last two days; alas; but moving on)#my stress response was that in a fit of apathy i shut myself down from academia and stopped to paint this#six hours total? on this funky little thing! had to push myself to finish the magnifying glass but!! looks so cool. i'm impressed with my e#fun fact: all the shades are hand-coloured. aka everything is digitally hand painted hooray!! i havent painted for a long time (ish)#smth about this musical makes me want to paint. it's very lovely that way#it's also a miracle i haven't gotten carpal tunnel or any wrist injuries so far... i'm a lucky person! hooray#i had so many thoughts to ramble about and now i don't recall any of them.#-! about this piece: inspired specifically by that one line that i doodled in the margins of a math practice last night#the diagonal slant was very. thinky. the rendering and angle were kinda contradictory to do but it's fineeee (draft was diff. pov)#i liked the red abstraction. and the way that people (misc) gave same vibes as red blood cells.#green for vincent because contrasting colour!! considered a spotlight that was more obv bc. again theatre lighting is so cool. but that was#a bit too literal? i think. so just fun little highlights. no one look at the accuracy of anything here though.. shadows do Not do this#also like hehehe lin. forest. forest of people. i really liked thinking about that. hehehe#i didn't know the font to use!! or quote!! so i slapped on the name of the musical and called it a day... the blank one is in the google-#-folder if you want to add your own stuff :') also also i wasn't sure about cropping at all. so again high res in google drive link#which is under the keep-reading sign! kind of a choose your own adventure because i'm lazy :3#ajhshdhfhfhfhf i think i've been fuelled by the tags under each post so far. so intensely. so very nice.#also when the cast or creators drop fun facts... serotonin right there.. they're all so nice waaagh it's so cool that they like my stuff ><#<laughs> really grateful that the whole fandom's so sweet <3 thank you for your support TvT#alright!! off to mess about with chemistry. jiayou me.#oh yes. a post script about the cropping crisis: i wasn't sure how small i wanted to make him. in proportion to the crowd. so if you see it#on mobile ig it's tiny and on laptop it kind of makes sense ...
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this video from the third show is so crazy i literally forgot how FUN those first few weeks felt...diy costume, gerard audibly out of breath a few songs in but unable to stop telling goofy rambling stories between songs, ray toro pedal assistant extraordinaire (they didn't even have the special mic stand yet)...REAAALLLLLL LIGHTERSSSSS...YO. WE'RE JUST HANGIN OUT AND HAVIN A GOOD TIME...ALRIGHT, BACK DOWN. MOODY MOODY MOODY! AJ C'MAHN. like we didn't even realise how comparitively unpolished they were because they already sounded better than ever! and they were already playing deep cuts! we were all just rediscovering my chemical romance. 2gether <3
#sorryyynto be sappy i just watched this show for the first time bc turns out i got my dates wrong#the last time i had a bad flare-up before this current one was on this day....and then i was fine until literally the end of the tour...#whay do the put in the my chemicla romance......#also. RAY MOUTHING 'THAT'S BEAUTIFUL' AT THE CROWD DURING HIS SOLO#aj is their lighting guy btw lmaooo <333#can't stop watching this fr#also if you hate summertime. get better soon :)#mk 1#highlights#**#sorry if someone has already posted this exact thing i literally just slept for like 11 hours what the fuck.
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~ Monthly BL Breakdown: October 2023 ~
☔️ Happy November!!! 🍁
Disclaimer: ALL shows can be streamed here or here, as well as on Youtube and other platforms. For more info on where to watch what, check out this post!
New breakdowns are coming at the end of every month - feel free to add stuff! -> previous breakdowns
What came out this month? (green = seen/currently watching)
🌟 Sasaki to Miyano - October 1st (Japan)
🌟 If It's With You aka Even If I Fall In Love With You - October 5th (Japan)
🌟 What Did You Eat Yesterday? Season 2 - October 6th (Japan)
🌟 Boys Like Boys (dating reality show) - October 9th (Taiwan)
🌟 Lucky Love - October 15th (Thailand)
🌟 GMMTV2024 lineup event - October 17th (Thailand) ✅
🌟 One Room Angel (manga adaption) - October 19th (Japan)
🌟 Bump Up Business - October 20th (South Korea)
🌟 My Dear Gangster Oppa - October 26th (Thailand)
🌟 The Camp Fire (part of Y Universe) - October 29th (Thailand) ✅
🌟 Shadow - October 31st (Thailand)
Monthly likes/dislikes
👎🏻 my rant of the month goes to the delulu ON stans and their fucked up actions like how messed up do you have to be fr. no idea where these peoples' common sense went but I hope this doesn't affect Kidnap in the long run. I'm excited for the show and I hope they can overlook the bullshit. I'm sure Ohm is used to it by now anyway but leave Leng alone ffs. big sigh.
New series & movie announcements
🎥 Dear Kitakyushu - Coming 2024 (Thailand/Japan)
🎥 1000 Years Old - Date TBA (Thailand)
🎥 Perfect Propose - Date TBA (Japan)
🎥 That Year 162 Rainfalls (novel adaption, by the author of HIStory: Trapped & Kiseki: Dear to Me) - Date TBA (Taiwan)
🎥 High Demand - Coming 2024 (Thailand)
🎥 The Hidden Moon - Date TBA (Thailand)
🎥 Eu Is Love - Date TBA (South Korea)
🎥 OMG Vampire (from the director of Dear Doctor) - Date TBA (Thailand)
🎥 Dead Friend Forever (a BOC original) - Date TBA (Thailand)
Other news from the BL world
❗️ FortPeat (Love in the Air) were announced as the leads for MeMindY's upcoming BL Love Sea. The drama will air in 2024.
❗️ BossNoeul (Love in the Air) were announced as the leads for MeMindY's upcoming BL The Boy Next World. The drama is considered a TharnType-spinoff surrounding Phugun & Cirrus and will air in 2024.
❗️ Dear Kitakyushu was announced as the first Thai-Japanese crossover BL movie. Mark Siwat and Uemura Souta will star as the leads; shooting has already begun. The film will air in 2024.
❗️ After rumors spread about an upcoming Thai adaption of the Korean BL Semantic Error, the author of the original novel came forward and negated the rumor.
❗️ The author of the adapted BL novels Triage and Manner Of Death announced that her novel Euthanasia will be adapted soon. It tells the story of a doctor who advocates euthanasia and becomes a suspect when mysterious deaths occur. One of the victims is the mother of an inspector who was battling cancer.
❗️ The first part of the GMMTV2024 lineup event was held on October 17th. The following BLs were announced:
We Are (starring PondPhuwin, AouBoom, WinnySatang, MarcPawin)
The Trainee (starring OffGun)
Summer Night (starring Phuwin & Dunk, with BL side cp)
Only Boo (starring SeaKeen)
Ossan's Love Thailand (starring EarthMix)
My Golden Blood (starring JossGawin)
Wandee Goodday (starring GreatInn)
My Love Mixup (starring GemFourth)
-> After initial confusions, GMMTV confirmed Kidnap to be a BL as well. The show stars Ohm Pawat and newbie actor Leng Thanaphon. This announcement however caused fans associated with the OhmNanon ship to protest publicly in the form of multiple LED ads across Bangkok, as well as public letters of complaint, shitstorms on Twitter and collective harassments on social media towards Leng. Neither of the actors nor the company have released a statement about the incidents yet.
❗️ Korean model and actor Nam Yoon Su was announced as the lead actor in the upcoming KBL Love in the Big City. Further details are yet to be announced.
❗️The Korean BL Unintentional Love Story is getting a spinoff revolving around the characters HoTae and DongHee. Filming is set to begin soon.
❗️ At the streaming event for the final episode of Love in Translation, the mains Daou & Offroad announced they will star in a movie together in 2024.
❗️ After winning the Be On Cloud reality show The Hidden Character, actors Ta Nannakun and Copper Phuriwat were offered the lead roles in the original Be On Cloud series "Dead Friend Forever", which was written by Sammon. The genre is described as 90's teen slasher horror. Filming has already started and the show is set to air on December 23rd.
Upcoming series & movies for November
👉🏻 Twins - November 3rd (Thailand)
👉🏻 Last Twilight - November 10th (Thailand)
👉🏻 Middleman's Love - November 10th (Thailand)
👉🏻 Beyond the Star - November 11th (Thailand)
👉🏻 Playboyy - November 16th (Thailand)
👉🏻 Pit Babe - November 17th (Thailand)
👉🏻 Wheels and Axle - November 17th (Thailand)
👉🏻 Bake Me Please (starring Ohm Thitiwat) - November 19th (Thailand)
👉🏻 7 Days Before Valentine - November 22nd (Thailand)
👉🏻 VIP Only - November 24th (Taiwan)
👉🏻 The Sign - November 25th (Thailand)
👉🏻 For Him - November 30th (Thailand)
👉🏻 Sahara Sensei to Toki-kun - November 30th (Japan)
👉🏻 Boy of God - November TBA (Thailand)
👉🏻 Wuju Bakery - November TBA (Thailand)
👉🏻 Online in Love - November TBA (Philippines)
#doreens monthly bl breakdown#thai bl#bl drama#upcoming bl#update#bl news#my personal highlights of this month: the semantic error rumors djkghfd#this literally started from fourth posting a picture with a suspicious haircut and ppl went crazy#i cant#every day we stray further from the light#also do we talk about the gmm lineup or.....#better not dflkghf#my only comment is that My Golden Blood is gonna be ridiculous and GreatInn sounds more like a motel than a ship sdkjhfds that's all thank
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Something about younger pat is just superior idk. I’m here to provide the content needed to all stimulate our brains… and yes he’s wearing a hoodie that says “hockey boy” on it 😭😭😭
#nolpat#nolan patrick#I’m sure you’ve seen some of these#but I’m bringing it back#cause nolpat isn’t gonna provide content himself for us#baby cat#literally baby#he looked like the kind of kid that did not care to throw a ball at your head#just for the sake of having a good personal laugh#I’ve always been amazed at his hair colour lmao#cause wtf are you auburn? ginger? lowkey looking like their is highlights? like what#flow for days#my post#np19
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OH. HEY.
MY HUNGER IS SATIATED.
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
*furiously waves* 🏳️🌈🏳️🌈🏳️🌈🏳️🌈🏳️🌈🏳️🌈🏳️🌈🏳️🌈🏳️🌈🏳️🌈🏳️🌈🏳️🌈🏳️🌈🏳️🌈🏳️🌈
#Nimona#LITERALLY THE DAY I’M STARVING FOR CONTENT I GET IT#OK I’M HELD OVER UNTIL FRIDAY EVERYTHING’S FINE 😂#OK THE ACTUAL CONTENT#I WAS *LAUGHING* SO HARD#STARTED CHOKING#NIMONA ASKING IF SHE SHOULD SHIFT#BALLISTER STUCK IN A CAR ADVERTISEMENT#THAT ONE GUY TRYING TO HELP#NIMONA BITING HIM AND CHASING HIM 😂#And above all#AMBROSIUS#MY GOD HE’S TOO PRETTY#AND HE CALLS HIM BAL#AND THE LIKE JUXTAPOSITION OF HOW THEY LOOK AT EACH OTHER#BAL FULL OF LIKE HATRED AND WARINESS AND ANGER LIKE TOTALLY GUARDING HIMSELF#DOESN’T LOOK HUMAN AT ALL#LOOKS MORE LIKE A FEROCIOUS ANIMAL#AND THEN AMBROSIUS WITH EVERY EMOTION EVER IN HIS EYES — PAINFULLY HUMAN#THE HIGHLIGHT IN HIS EYE BEING A TRIANGLE RATHER THAN A RHOMBUS TO SHOW HE’S ONLY HALF OF HIMSELF NOW W/O BAL#(can you tell by now I’m obsessed I even have the shape of the eye highlights memorized ahhahaahahahah)#AND THEN THEY DRIVE OFF#WITH LIKE HUNDREDS OF ARROWS IN THE TRUNK AND BAL LOOKING LIKE A FED UP DAD#😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂#too good guys#too good#OH AND THE DRAGON PRINCE TRAILER IS *SO* GOOD#JEEZ ANIMATION IS ON A WHOLE NOTHER LEVEL THIS YEAR#AND IT’S GREAT#SO GLAD WE LIVE IN A WORLD AND TIME WHERE THESE THINGS EXIST
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head in hands like "maybe i should have realized this about myself sooner" as i am surrounded by neon flashing signs that Very Clearly Indicate the thing i should have realized about myself sooner
#anyway i'm just mulling about the 'tism skdjfhgljhdfg#thinking about how i've been having a hard time on site with my internship because i struggle to make small talk with my superiors#and everything is uncomfortable and terrible all of the time and i feel so so out of my depth#but talking with my university superior about the methodology of our profession#has me feeling like i'm playing just dance on extreme and i'm nailing every single beat w#like quite literally is like one of those rhythm games where when you get a combo it plays a cool sound effect#and i'm playing so well the sound effects are overlapping and the screen is just an explosion of stars w#so yeah i am. very comfortable talking academics and theory and things but. shit in social situations.#when i don't have that to rely on whoops#anyway it's just another thing on the incredibly long list of things i have building in my mind of#'why i should have realized i'm probably on the spectrum sooner'#the thrilling sequel to 'how did i go 20+ years without realizing i have ADHD' w#(speaking of)#(the way my ADHD has been leaping into the spotlight this week)#(biggest highlight was being jumpscared not once)#(not twice!!)#(but THREE times by food i had bought for myself)#(put down briefly)#(and then forgotten about for upwards of 30 minutes to 5 hours)#(like the other day i bought myself a little pastry on the way home as a congrats for surviving another week)#(and i put it on the table when i came inside)#(but i. forgot i did that. and went like 4 hours without even thinking about it)#(until i got up and left my room and saw the bag and went '! ! ! ! ! ! ! OH MY GO D MY PASTRY NOOOOOOO')#(the adhd and the autism . . . . they are attacking my ass . . . . . )
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