#link to the og is in the source link but CW FOR BLOOD

[baenxietydad]

julien baker // margaret atwood // julien baker // uli edel // sophocles // the mountain goats // sue zhao

[clownkillsyou]

Not to be annoying or anything but do you think you'll be able to explain the whole Happiness Combat thing to me? It seems like a really cool concept but I just,,, don't know where to start ifjdksksskm (also your art style is really gender and awesome <3 /gen)

hdgfsjd ok wait i think the post ended up gettin a lil bit long soo

happiness apotheosis is a fan animation that parodies madness combat 4 featuring a colorful grunt in place of hank, and instead of the grunt killing anybody they just give them things like candy/icecream/presents- they also try 2 give the sheriff a teddy bear but he assumes its a bomb (understandable since he Is being hunted down)

heres the newgrounds link - cw for blood/gore and a peepee joke near the end (and 2:12-2:17 is a reference to a nsfw krinkels animation- its just the shadows but its not hard to tell what going on)

when it comes to lore there is not a lot to take from the original source, even tho the grunt is much different from hank the rest of the world seems exactly like 'madness' nevada (aside from the posters which are very colorful and 'friendly' too) and the actual hank even makes a cameo at the end the intro also implies that the happiness grunt is able to come back like hank, probably just bc thats what the og intro was like and its a parody but i like taking things and running w em so they just seem to be a grunt that wants to spread happiness, but nevada is so used to death and violence that its kind of difficult for them do it without getting killed in the process, but they are very determined to keep trying

love that so many ppl in the fandom saw this lil guy and were like "they deserve Everything" and sort have just. made them a part of actual madness in some fan interpretations

and i kinda wish em549 didnt go inactive after 2010 i would love to ask him about the probably-nonexistent-lore

[sasstablook]

voidpunk feels, let’s go

quote, OG voidpunk @arotaro​: “I don’t have a voidsona because I don’t have much of a sense of self”

what is voidpunk? 1 2

a history of voidpunk

alright, the rest of it is under the cut!

cw: discussion of “scary” mental disorders, self harm mention, dysphoria talk, anorexia mention, violence mention, some mentions of sex, abuse discussion

so to start out with, these are my Official Diagnoses: C-PTSD, bipolar-1, and fibromyalgia. I am not against self-diagnosis, but I tend not to self-diagnose myself, for fear of using the wrong term and it coming back to bite me in the ass. that being said, I'm pretty certain (especially in regards to my bipolar disorder) that there's something else going on here that the professionals are missing. I'll only be discussing my symptoms from here on out, not my disorders as a whole.

my main symptoms I experience that make me "not human" are:

intrusive thoughts and impulsiveness

paranoia and psychosis

body, social, and mind dysphoria

memory loss and executive dysfunction

disorganized speech and being nonverbal

hypo/hyperactivity

ambivalence and black+white thinking

I started with a very long list, and I tried to group related symptoms together. so...

I'm going to refrain from inputting sources and various denotative definitions, speaking only on my personal experiences.

1. intrusive thoughts and impulsiveness

a lot of "normal" people get random unwanted thoughts. like that little voice that says "throw your phone in the river" when walking across a bridge. these aren't necessarily intrusive. the main thing that separates these two experiences is intensity. my personal pattern of intrusive thoughts includes a lot of violence. for fear of stigma, I won't go into further detail. but often times, these intrusive thoughts develop into impulses. these are things I do without thinking them through. I don't think about consequences, I just act. my brain tells me to... let's say, scream. like blood curdling, someone's getting murdered, scream. I just do it.

my brain tells me to hurt myself. I don't know why. I do it without further questioning or examination. not even to just get my brain to shut up, necessarily. there are some persistent intrusive thoughts that never get acted on. but some of them do lead to action, even if they're the least persistent of the bunch

2. paranoia and psychosis

these aren't necessarily linked in the way intrusive thoughts and impulsiveness are, being that one can exist without the other (impulsiveness is always caused by an intrusive thought). but they very often go hand in hand, with paranoid thinking leading to psychotic symptoms. example: I am paranoid that my roommates are talking about me in the other room; I then begin to hear voices-- which may or may not belong to my roommates-- whispering unintelligibly

3. body, social, and mind dysphoria

https://imgur.com/vp1EjlA

dysphoria is something a lot of trans folk can relate to. but my dysphoria isn't exclusively tied to my gender. my dysphoria is invariably linked to my dissociation and depersonalization experience. this ties into my inability to connect with human beings.

I experience body dysphoria in that I despise basic bodily functions and necessities to keep the body alive. this includes consuming food stuffs, which ties into my experiences with disordered eating (y'all remember when I was anorexic? yeah, the thoughts haven't went away, but I'm doing better with my actions now). also can humans just... not... with the bathroom thing. like is it absolutely necessary to piss and shit all the goddamn time.

I experience social dysphoria in the way I am perceived by others. this mostly ties into my gender. no matter what I do, I am always read as a girl. but even so, I struggle to be read as masculine in that I don't necessarily *want* to be read as masculine. because men are just flat out awful. and this isn't exclusive to cis men. I don't *want* to be associated with men. because if men are bad.... and I'm a man... then I must be bad, right?

which leads us to mind dysphoria and the same line of thinking in regards to my masculinity. I am at war with myself on exactly how I would like to be perceived by others. my feelings on The Way Men Are and my feelings on my own identity as a man do not coexist peacefully

4. memory loss and executive dysfunction

memory problems are a symptom of all three of my Official Diagnoses, so it's no surprise I struggle with short and long term memory. if the event occurred even last month, I probably won't remember it. I struggle to recall basic details about people I've known for years, including age and last names. so you can imagine what it's like when I meet someone new!

as far as executive dysfunction goes? I just... don't remember. I don't remember how to do the most basic things. I've had to have loved ones walk me through the steps of preparing a bowl of cereal before. no, I'm not joking

5. disorganized speech and being nonverbal

I love language. I'm a poet. language is my thing. I got a perfect 36 on the English portion of my ACT, dammit

but as time goes on, I'm losing my command of the English language. I use the wrong word in the middle of sentences. sometimes the word isn't even related to the word I meant to use, though I can't think of any specific examples right now. sometimes it's just straight up word salads, which make sense to me, but not to those around me.

sometimes my brain's language center just... gives up. during those times, I may utter one or two word sentences. I might just make noises. I might use gestures or ASL. I might text full sentences or just a couple words at a time. or I could just become completely and utterly silent, not even attempting to communicate. I don't understand this

6. hypo/hyperactivity

note: I chose the suffix "-activity" rather than "-sexuality" because this isn't just limited to my problems in bed, though that's a large part of it.

this is something that I've only become aware of after others have pointed it out to me. there are days where I move too slow for their comfort. and it isn't always related to my pain either. I can be having a good physical day and still move like a sloth. on the other hand, there are days when I'm bouncing off the walls

I also fluctuate between hypo/hypersexual. there are days when I am sex repulsed. there are days when all I want to do is fuck

7. ambivalence and black+white thinking

I live in such a state of contradiction. I don't know how to feel about people, concepts, what have you. in order to cope with this, my brain often sorts others into 2 categories: perfect and evil.

sometimes, someone who was perfect yesterday can be put in the evil category the next day (I'm currently experiencing this with a lover of mine). I don't see gray areas. I'm incapable of processing gray. which is odd, considering I'm on the gray-ace spectrum

all of these combined tend to cause certain thoughts, feelings, and actions in other people.

"that's not normal"

"that's weird"

"you're crazy"

"you're broken"

"what's wrong with you?"

"we're putting you here for your own safety"

"this will fix you"

sure, help me out a little. give me some medication, some therapy. but... "fix" me? what about me needs to be "fixed"? why do I need to be "fixed"? namely, why won't you listen when I tell you what I need in order to cope with my brain's battle against me? I don't need crisis intervention. I don't need an institution. I just need medication for my chemical imbalances and therapy to learn how to live with my brain. when you talk about "fixing" me... it's like the only reason you care is because I'm not a "productive" member of society. it's like you want to "fix" me for your benefit. does that make sense to anyone else but me? this comes back around to the disorganized speech and communication, I'm really not sure I'm getting across my thoughts effectively here.

people hurt me... I feel like they do this because they think I'm a villain. I feel like they hurt me to protect themselves. even if I go out of my way to shield them from the way I am inside, it might not be enough to help them feel safe around me

I'm scary.

for so long, I've been in love with aliens, and cryptids, and monsters, among other inhuman creatures. I relate to them. I feel so disconnected with my humanity, that these beings bring me comfort

and now, I'm not the only one

voidpunk

bonus: actual notes from my notepad that I took in an attempt to gather my thoughts

my voidpunk: aliens, cryptids, slasher horror, cyborgs/androids, uncanny valley, Homestuck, primal, cannibal, afterlife, demons, liminal spaces, occult, FNAF, psychedelics, Undertale, dandelions, hoarding, Twilight vampires, parasites, X-Men, we're all made of star stuff, death and decay, bugs and creepy crawlies, succubus/incubus, god complex, yandere simulator, fae, transparent, Nathan W. Pyle comics, the world is quiet here, Lemony Snicket, escapism, fernweh, unconventional beauty

things that make me voidpunk: sleep paralysis, hurting others, an urge to kill, impulsive violence, using sex to get what I want, hyper/hyposexuality, xenogenders, microlabels, neopronouns, dissociation, an inability to connect and relate to other humans, lack of "common sense", "men are trash", inability to distinguish between My Reality and Real Reality, I Don't Remember Anything, psychosis, can't pick up on subtlety, unsure how to socialize properly, I'm Scary, ambivalence, inability to make concrete decisions, self medicating, Out Of Control, how do I move properly, broken executive functioning, disorganized speech, paranoia, I despise basic bodily functions like eating and bathroom, what do you mean you can't read my mind, google: how to communicate effectively, black and white thinking

[hertl]

why u should love tomas hertl

welcome to my ted talk. obv i’m completely biased BUT let me explain why #48 on the san jose sharks is an angel, overall blessing to hockey and humanity, and deserves ur love and probably everything in the world 

(complete w links, videos, and associated propaganda)

- drafted 17th overall in 2012 and came to the nhl at 19 not knowing any english

- in his 3rd nhl game he scored 4 goals including the OG between the legs top corner shot aka the best goal i’ve seen in my life. they let him keep the hats people tossed for his first hat trick

- that game led to the infamous dick trick quote from jumbo joe

- in his postgame interview, his english still wasn’t very good and he basically repeated “this is dream” over and over and if u don’t think that’s the cutest thing sorry but ur Wrong

- his nickname was teenage mutant ninja hertl (now just ninja hertl or hertl turtle)

- he is fascinated by dave & busters and how u can win prizes. after being introduced to it by matt nieto he went back alone and came back with 3 stuffed animals, one of which was a ninja turtle

- his best friend on the team was tommy wingels before he got traded. pls watch this beautiful video on their friendship maybe with like 2 tissues on hand. i promise it’s worth it. 

- the tommys have the cutest lip reading video

- hertl also sent him the cutest tweet when he left. did i cry about it? u fuckin bet

- in case u are now invested rest assured bc hertl said they still talk often despite the trade but couture and dillon are filling in now

- he acknowledges that he has a big butt multiple times and wants to use it more to improve his game

- suffered horrible knee injuries (lookin at u dustin the devil brown) in his first few seasons but has worked very hard to recover and is now becoming the star forward we all knew he would be

- did pool rehab after his knee injuries with a bunch of seniors leading to cute pictures but also his catch phrase “fun must be always :-))”

- fun must be always catchphrase is fully embraced by the sharks and they made pool floaties as a giveaway to commemorate it

- he always takes time out his pregame warmup to pass pucks to kids and is usually last off the ice bc of it (no source but i’ve witnessed it at every game i’ve been to but have this instead)

- known for always smiling. he got hit in the face by a puck and even that didn’t stop him from smiling (injury/blood cw) 

- literally always. said that when he gets checked in a game he smiles in response because that’s just his style. bless.

- his idol is jagr and he did a photoshoot in the same style as him. iconic.

- did sharks for life commercials with patty marleau and dylan demelo and was very very adorable in both. just giggles the whole time and gets all his lines wrong

- literally loves martin jones so much. praises him in almost all his postgame interviews and always gives him the best hugs

- in conclusion tomas hertl is a literal angel and he deserves all the love in the whole world. thanks for coming to my ted talk. 

- image sources: x x x x x

[tvserieshub]

  This was a magnificently written episode by Michael Narducci and co-written by Michael Russo. We get a little bit of everything in this episode, vampires rising! (Elijah) We got amazing team-ups! (Freya, Hayley and Keelin too). The story told thru flashbacks of Marcel and Vincent and “What happened in NOLA in the last 5 years?” Klaus in captivity! (Not for long!) Oh, yeah the greenish-blue hoodoo on the walls scaring the beegezus out of poor little Hope! Where does one begin?

  Vincent’s Speech.

I found it quite contrived, histrionic and distributing, at this point in the game. He is giving a speech at the church to his coven. (Church and Witches never mixed to me?? How do you feel???) The Vampires have been around over thousands of years! “We will loose it forever.” The witches deserve respect but “Original Vampires and Original Hybrids” triumph witches. (SCORE TEAM OG!) Just as Vincent speaks of “Monsters” — the camera zooms in on Klaus, REALLY NOW? They never give up!

  Marcel and Sofya.

We then move over to Marcel and his new witch. What’s her face? Whatever. “Hayley Marshall is a problem?” Really Marcel? Alastair is wondering about Elijah’s sire line? (BEWARE Alastair! Elijah is “Alive and Kicking”. Just slumbering in a coffin! You’ve been put on notice!) Hayley is searching for Elijah. #TeamFreeElijah! A bit later on, Sofya tells her boo. “There is graffiti popping up all over town, you need to handle that.” (Picture of ouroboros) I say: Signs, Signs, everywhere there are signs! When are they going to take heed to Vincent’s warnings?

  Hayley, Hope and Mary.

Hayley and Hope are a revelation together. SO ADORABLE! Mary needs to give it up on Hayley. She is a Mikaelson!!! Not only is she a Mikaelson, what would possess this woman to tell her “Did you ever wonder if you be better off not waking him (As in Klaus) up?” Seriously Mary you still holding a grudge? “YOU NEED TO LET IT GO”. (Like the Disney song says!) Of course, she thinks Hayley is looking to  wake Elijah up too! What does she think? Only wake up Klaus and not the other 4? (As I RME HARD and LAUGH REALLY HARD HYSTERICALLY). Mary gives Hayley the 411. She needs to look for one more wolf line to have the cure. AND you know like Donkey Kong, Hayley is on it!

Klaus and Marcel.

Klaus never is one to mince his words. “What I’d most enjoy is for you to rot in HELL.” -Klaus (Score 1 #TeamKlaus) Not to be outdone, Marcel has to throw salt on an old wound. “Alistair Duquesne is in town. How do you want this to go?” I have to say I really enjoy Klaus’ quick turn around, “He was a vane aristocrat.” If you can translate KLAUS SPEAK: “I’M GOING TO KILL HIM.” Marcel comes back from his “Alastair endgame party” AND he found something out. WOO HOO. “Elijah and your siblings are all linked to you.” Marcel tells Klaus (REVELATION!) This only gets worse because he tells Klaus about the vampires tracking him and getting his blood. They will no doubtfully find his family then Hope! We cannot have that. You know Klaus will burn the world and kill all of them! We then go to the Original Vampire Death match round 1: Klaus vs. Alastair! Ding. Ding. Ding. I have to say Marcel is very Machiavellian at playing both sides. He tells Alastair “The sword you gave me would give me an agonizing death.” HUGE TWIST! Marcel cuts Klaus free! Alastair is deader then dead in a NY minute. It’s not before Marcel recaptures Klaus again? What is this? I’m getting dizzy. He brings Klaus back down to the dungeon where he proceeds to stab him again with the Papa Tunde blade. Marcel, you are no friend of mine.

Hayley/Freya/Keelin:

We think it’s a casual night at the bar, or so it seems.  Hayley and Keelin knocking back drinks. Keelin tells Hayley she finished her ER residence. (You know like gals do!) Hold up wait! These guys came to the bar to try and kill her. Hayley wolfs out on them. We fast forward to curing Elijah! (Yay!!!! Finally!!!) The only thing they were missing was Keelin’s venom. She was the missing piece of the puzzle! TADA. After this is done, Keelin wants to be set free. Why do you suspect a “NO DEAL” on this? I DO TOO! Company arrives and not the good kind… “That’s what been tracking me.” – Keelin “It took a long time and now we caught you.” – Vampire (OR SO YOU THINK FOOL!) “Keelin gave her venom and wants to be free. Again, Freya does not want to let her go. I’m seeing a pattern here. “If any of my family is ever bitten again, I will need your venom.” – Freya (Maybe you want her around too? Admit it, Freya. *wink* *wink* *hint*) Freya is doing the spell.  All Keelin wants to know is did it work? Hayley’s in wolf form killing the vamps. BUT something is snapping necks and killing the vampires. OMG, who can it, be now? Elijah???

(Elijah and Hayley) Haylijah Scene:

Hayley in disbelief grabs Elijah and holds him tighter than she ever could. It’s like she never wants to let him go. Elijah is holding her back with so many feelings. It was indescribable. You could feel the intensity and love between them in that moment.  It was like they never separated.

“And they say romance is dead.” Elijah

“I’ll take it.”-  Hayley

“You saved us, all of us.” – Hayley

“I guess Kol and Rebekah couldn’t contain there hunger.”- Elijah

“After all this time.”- Hayley

“Me too.” – Elijah

“How is Hope?”- Elijah

“She made me promise that I would get all her family back.” – Hayley

“Let’s go get him. “– Elijah

It was such an emotional filled reunion and so beautifully done. The words really couldn’t describe all the emotions they were feeling that moment. The first person he asks about after knowing Hayley was alright was Hope! He acknowledged “Me too.” (A subliminal “I Love you.”) I sure knew the fans were over the moon with anticipation of what’s to come and ahead for these two.

  Josh Sighting!

I’m so glad Josh is back, he brings so much comic relief to the show. Welcome back Josh! It’s long overdue!

  Vincent getting his groove back:

“Everyone has to stay in the quarter the next week.” – Vincent

I love how Vincent was looking out for his new witch girlfriend. Everyone needs companionship and love, you know! Josh’s one liners are always killers too.

“Maxine” Vincent

“She is into you.” – Josh

    Vincent/Klaus Anvil:

“Beware of the sleeping giant, when he wakes, the earth will shake.” – Vincent says to Klaus

It was the next scene that really hits you over the head. “Marcel fed you blood, I kept you in chains.” – Vincent (Confucius say: Another words even though he was a prisoner, Klaus shouldn’t be mad, eh, I don’t think so Vincent…) KLAUS SPEAK AGAIN: “I will escape and seek my own justice.” (I will hunt you down and murder you all!) OH BOY! Vincent went there. He played the Camille card! “I had a friend once, Cami, she was hell bent on proving me wrong.” (OH NO YOU DIDN’T! NO ONE BRINGS UP Klaus’ beloved Camille, NO ONE!)

  What Bad Dreams and Stephen King Movies are made of?

“Vincent, its Adam he never came home!” – Maxine

We see Adam walking down a long hall. He opens the door… He sees the ouroboros sign! (We see the bluish green lights in the circular motion moving!) Run Adam Run! Hope screams! We flash over to Mary. Who tells Hope “You’re safe, I’m not going anywhere.” (We’ve heard that in every horror movie EVER MADE!)

  I hope you enjoyed my recap. Until next time.

SOURCE/MANY THANKS: @DanielGilliesSource for Haylijah picture!

SOURCE/MANY THANKS: Klaus in chains, Freelin and Marcel and Klaus pic @CW!

SOURCE/MANY THANKS: Freelin picture @CW!

  The Originals (S04E01): “Gather Up The Killers” This was a magnificently written episode by Michael Narducci and co-written by Michael Russo. We get a little bit of everything in this episode, vampires rising!