#link deserves to have a cool ass prosthetic

[kifaprokumiv]

Sonia and her rabid Pomeranian

[tisfan]

Anything Goes (and usually does)

Square: S2 - carnival Warning: hand job, sex in a public place, anal sex Pairing: Tony Stark/Bucky Barnes Summary: A night at the fair, anything and everything goes... Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18098183 Word Count 2,665 For @tonystarkbingo

A/n - also for Bottom Bucky Fest for @hellyeahbottombucky 

“Bet you couldn’t hit the broadside of a barn,” the carnie heckled from the safety of his game’s box.

Bucky, who was eating a funnel cake, stopped dead. “Are you talkin’ to me?”

“Yeah, you with powdered sugar all over your gay rainbow shirt,” the guy smirked. “Can you throw, or just catch?”

Bucky glanced down; he was, in fact, wearing a Pride hoodie, black with the logo “Straight outta the Closet” on it. There were flecks of sugar on it, too. Which wasn’t shocking, funnel cake wasn’t exactly neat eating. He considered ignoring the guy -- mostly because he didn’t trust him enough to put his funnel cake down on the game-stand in order to play.

“This game’s rigged,” said another guy, this one leaning against the stand, eyeballing the hoops. He was fucking gorgeous, all luminous brown eyes, neatly shaved goatee, and sensual mouth,

“Probably,” Bucky agreed. “But if you hold my funnel cake, I’ll win you a teddy bear.”

“Deal, handsome,” the guy said. “It’s Tony, by the way.”

“You’re wasting my time,” the carnie said. “You gonna throw, or just run your mouth?”

Bucky unzipped his hoodie. “Hold this.”

(More below the cut)

“Do I look like a portable shelf-- woah, nice arm.”

“Thank you,” Bucky said, flexing it, listening to the servos whine and the plates click. “Three balls, ten dollars, can continue to throw as long as I don’t miss, right?”

“Yeah,” the carnie said, sourly, eyeballing Bucky’s arm. Top of the the line, prototype prosthetic. It probably wasn’t counted as cheating, but it was. The hardware that kept it functional was wired directly into Bucky’s brain. He couldn’t miss if he wanted to. He handed the guy a ten.

“Next time, don’t judge a book by its rainbow cover, asshole,” Tony said. He was already eating Bucky’s funnel cake, but that was okay. Bucky was going to be there for a while.

“That bear is bigger than I am,” Tony complained. Which was true. Bucky was carrying it, not quite sure what else to do with it. Tony was skipping along behind Bucky, trying to keep up, talking a mile a minute. “You were amazing, you were just-- wow, I mean-- that was amazing.”

“You ate my funnel cake,” Bucky told him. “You have sugar-- just--” He turned around so fast that Tony bumped right into him and was suddenly much closer than Bucky had anticipated, chin tipped up and mouth slightly open. Inviting. Bucky shifted the giant bear to one side, metal hand keeping it upright, and decided that someone who stole his funnel cake deserved what he got, and he licked the sugar off of Tony’s chin, and his bottom lip, and then-- they were necking.

In the middle of the fair, the middle of the midway, they were kissing frantically. Bucky’s free hand went down to cup Tony’s ass and pull him closer by that perfect curve.

“Get a room,” someone heckled, and Bucky pulled back. Astonished at himself for doing that. For Tony letting him.

“Wow,” Tony said. “Turns out you throw, you kiss, and you look good. What else can you do?”

“Just you wait,” Bucky told him, vaguely flirting, vaguely threatening.

Kisses in the midway lead to a hand on Tony’s thigh during the rickety little coaster, while Tony clung to his arm and buried his face against Bucky’s shoulder. “I am going to die on this thing, and won’t that be a fucking headline?” Tony groaned.

“Should make ya go on it again,” Bucky said, fingers and leg tingling from the close contact. And from carrying the damn bear. “Come on, back t’ my truck, I wanna drop this fuckin’ thing off before I tear it or somethin’.”

Tony linked his fingers with Bucky. “Sure-- your truck have a back seat?”

Bucky grinned, and brought him back to the Dodge Ram, huge and black and ridiculous. And Bucky loved it.

“This is your ‘I’m compensating for something’ vehicle, right?”

“Ain’t lackin’ nothing, sweetheart,” Bucky said. He tossed the bear into the passenger seat, then opened the back door. “Hop in, lemme take you for  ride.”

“Oh, we’ve moved on to cheesy pick up lines. I knew I liked you.” He climbed in, giving Bucky a look at that amazing ass, the way his jeans outlined it perfectly. It could have been framed and hung in a museum, it was a work of fucking art.

It wasn’t long before Bucky was fogging up the windshield of his own truck, with Tony’s hand down the front of his pants. Tony was rutting up against Bucky’s thigh and talking dirty in his ear when someone rapped on the glass.

The guy who stared in at them, glaring behind the flare of his flashlight, wasn’t a cop. Mall security with delusions of grandeur, maybe. Rent-a-badge with something to prove.

“I know damn well you two could get a room,” the man said. He put his hand on the butt of his pistol, like that meant anything. Like Bucky couldn’t take it away and make him fucking eat it. But it wasn’t the place.

“Yeah, just stopping in to drop off the prize,” Bucky said, jerking a metal thumb at the bear, as if anyone could possibly miss it, huge and furry as it was.

“Uh-huh. Either go back and spend money, or get the hell out of here,” the badge said.

“Sure thing,” Tony said, sliding out of the truck with lithe grace. “No need to trouble your head over us.”

Bucky recognized the tone of voice in someone offering a bribe, but Tony was slick. Bucky couldn’t see the hand off, but the badge just nodded, gestured for them to go the fuck away.

“You didn’t have to do that,” Bucky said, trying to walk in tight jeans with an erection that didn’t want to die down.

“I’m not ready to go to a shabby hotel with you,” Tony said, his hips swaying delightfully.

“What about a nice hotel?”

“Ask me again later,” Tony said. “Right now, I want you to blow me on the Ferris Wheel.”

Bucky about swallowed his tongue. “Are you even serious, right now?”

“Sure, why not?” Tony wondered.

“We’re going to get arrested,” Bucky pointed out.

“We’re not going to get arrested,” Tony said.

They did not get arrested.

But that was also probably because Bucky point blank refused to move from the gently rocking cart to get on the floor in the first place. As soon as it rocked harder as he shifted, he was done. No thanks.

Tony leaned against his side, though, and Bucky was able to unzip him, work a hand into the front of Tony’s pants, and work him over.

Tony casually untucked his shirt, letting the tails billow out and over Bucky’s hand.

“Yeah, you just lean here, baby,” Bucky told him, tucking Tony against his chest. He fit perfectly, a little spoon to Bucky’s huge hands and long arms.

Tony’s cock was smooth, velvet heat and hard against Bucky’s palm, even as Tony went soft and pliant in his arms. Tony made soft, urgent noises as he pushed into Bucky’s touch. Long, smooth pulls up the shaft, some thumbwork over the head. Tony sighed and shifted, teeth digging into his lip as Bucky worked him over.

“Yeah, like, oh, that’s so--”

“Look out the window and see the view,” Bucky insisted, every time Tony’s eyes fluttered shut behind those ridiculously lush eyelashes.

“Only thing worth looking at is right behind me,” Tony protested, but tried to look like nothing was going on. Just two guys, chilling less than five feet away.

Bucky licked at the shell of Tony’s ear, keeping his strokes even, steady, gradually increasing the pressure, the way he squeezed over the head. He didn’t want to rock the cart too much, or give the obvious shake of his shoulders, showing off what they were doing.

All too soon, the ride came to an end. Tony zipped but didn’t bother to tuck his shirt in, keeping the tail out to cover the obvious bulge in his trousers.

“We need to find someplace dark and private, like pronto,” Tony said, keeping his hand linked with Bucky’s.

“I’m down for that,” Bucky said, looking around.

“Bucky--”

“What?”

“Bucky--” Tony was practically yanking his arm out of the socket, which was more likely and less hyperbole than usual for that statement.

“What?”

“Look, look, look--”

Magic Maze: Hall of Mirrors.

And below it… Out of Order.

“Oh, no, no, no--”

“Yes, yes, yes,” Tony said, dragging Bucky off the midway and around behind the web of giant power cables and water lines, between trailers and along the back row, where only the carnies ever went.

It smelled even more like faire-- stale popcorn, cotton candy, animal shit, dirt, mud, sweat. Tony crept up to the door marked Staff Only and twisted the knob. It wasn’t locked.

“You know, there’s probably a reason it’s marked out of order,” Bucky said, but Tony slipped free and darted into the maze. It was dark as the inside of Bucky’s boot, and then a flash of color as Tony pulled out his phone.

Hundreds of Tonys in every possible shape and size stared around in wonder.

“Pretty cool, right Bucko?”

“We’re going to get lost in here and look like utter tools--”

“I am a genius, and we’re not going to get lost. Come on--”

Bucky moved quickly, bumping his fingers into two sets of mirrors before finally getting his hands on Tony.

Which seemed to be what Tony was waiting for, because the maze went dark as Bucky was pushed up against a mirror and kissed. Tony traced a line up Bucky’s arm, sending shivers along electronic nerves. “Isn’t this nice?”

“I think a bed would be nice,” Bucky pointed out, but he bent his head to accept another heated, eager kiss.

“Only if you’re in it with me.”

“Well, yeah--” Bucky said, playing with the strands of Tony’s hair, feeling the soft locks between his fingers.

“But right now, I’m in the mood for something dirty.”

“I like how that sounds,” Bucky said. “Got something in mind?”

“Come on, just back here--” Bucky was dragged off in the near darkness to a nook. Three enormous stairs led up to a crystal, perfect mirror.

“Here?”

“Brace your hands, spread your legs,” Tony told him.

Oh. Oh.

Bucky turned and sat down on the first step, cradling Tony between his knees, seeking more of those slow, deep kisses that got him dizzy and crazy with wanting. “God I love how you kiss,” Bucky confessed.

“You’ll love the rest of it, too,” Tony promised. “Now, do as I tell you.”

Bucky stood, unzipped and pushed his jeans down around his knees, spreading his legs. He bent, put his hands on the stair and let gravity straighten out his back.

Tony was already busy with a packet of lube, because of course he just happened to have it with him. “Yeah, you want this?”

“Want whatever you got for me,” Bucky said. “Gimme your phone.”

“You gonna take selfies while I’m giving it to you from behind?”

“Well, that’s an idea, but no,” Bucky said. “I just want to be able to see you.” He flicked through the apps until he found the one every concert-goer had these days; portable lighter, since no one smoked. He flicked it on, set the phone to catch the mirror, reflecting the pixelated fire back at them from a hundred directions.

“Gonna walk backward into hell and give God the bird,” Tony said, voice low and awed.

“Gonna get busy back there before someone walks in on us,” Bucky scolded.

Tony opened the lube, finally, and got to work, sliding one hand up Bucky’s cock, aching and needy, and the other over his ass, down his crack. “You are huge,” Tony told him. “I can barely get my fingers around you.”

“Do something else with your fingers, then--”

“Bossy bottom,” Tony said, teasing and then he bent and bit the curve of Bucky’s ass, eliciting a startled squeak. Tony felt him up and stroked him off, all the while working two fingers into Bucky’s ass. Each thrust made Bucky shake and his insides tremble.

“You keep doin’ that an’ I’mma come all over these steps,” Bucky warned.

“Oh, yeah, here,” Tony said. He handed Bucky a condom. “Wrap up. Less mess.”

When Bucky was slick and ready, Tony met his eyes in the mirror, sparkling with interest. God, he was so beautiful, Bucky was hypnotized, unable to look away. Tony put his hands on Bucky’s hips, guided himself in. Stretch and burn, still trapped by Tony’s gaze, Bucky wriggled and tested, pushing back at that heat and pressure.

It took a bit of shifting around, a muttered curse as Bucky had to bend further to get lined up, and then it was all worth it, slick and slide.

“You’re so tight,” Tony muttered. His hands cradled Bucky’s ass, holding him steady until they matched rhythms.

Bucky had strong thighs and good balance, but he was shaking in moments, arms burning as he held himself up for Tony. He could barely breathe as Tony fucked into him, over and again, pushing and thrusting. His cock bobbled gently in front of him as Tony’s thighs slapped against Bucky’s skin.

“God, Tony--” Bucky’s voice broke and cracked as he cried out, needing it, wanting it so bad. His body clenched against Tony’s, squeezing around him.

“Yeah, that’s good, that’s good, you wanton, you need it, don’t you?”

“You know it,” Bucky said, pushing back again, feeling full and stretched and stuffed. He ached for Tony, didn’t need anything else. Needed that cock the way he needed air, the way he needed water to quench his thirst. “Give it to me!”

“All you have to do is ask nicely,” Tony teased, getting a hand on Bucky’s dick. The condom squeaked as Tony rubbed him, practically pulling it off, but it wasn’t like it mattered, it was just to catch the excess.

“Please, please, come on, Tony!”

Tony was like steel inside him, hard and hot and perfect, and Bucky was whining with each stroke, taking it and taking it, god, so deep. He wriggled, adding the perfect counterpoint to Tony’s thrusts, and that was all it took, sending him shooting off, clenching in rhythmic surges.

“Oh, god--” Tony gasped, his timing dissolving into excited rutting.

Bucky nearly slipped, but managed to keep from face-planting into the stairs, gasping for breath. “Oh, oh, Christ.”

“You said it, love,” Tony said, sliding the condom off Bucky’s softening prick. “Here, deal with this.”

“And he calls me bossy,” Bucky complained, but held it twisted around his finger until Tony backed off.

“You look well fucked,” Tony told him, running one hand down the curve of Bucky’s ass.

“What a coincidence, I feel well fucked,” Bucky said, tying the condom off. There wasn’t a handy trashcan nearby. Gross. He pulled his jeans up one handed, half jumping back into them.

“You could just toss it on the floor,” Tony said.

“Don’t be disgusting, people have to clean up in here,” Bucky said. “You got a tissue or something?”

“No, but-- look, here.” Tony bent and picked up an empty candy box. “Stick ‘em in there, we’ll get a trash can on the way out. I’m gonna text Happy to come pick me up.”

“Or you could just ride back in my truck,” Bucky said, rolling his eyes.

“Get in a car with a stranger, I would never--” Tony responded.

“Asshole. We live together,” Bucky told him, like Tony didn’t know it.

“You’re breaking character,” Tony said. “I like the idea of hitting up a random sexy stranger. Makes me feel young again.”

“Don’t worry,” Bucky told him. “I don’t think you’re ever going to grow up.”

“Love you, too, toots,” Tony said.

“I know,” Bucky said, drawing Tony in and stealing a kiss. “Love you, too.”

[bryanclaesch]

The Top 10 Reasons Why Yang Should Be Your Favorite Character

Hey, everyone.

So to finish up my Top 10 Reasons Why This-Character Should Be Your Favorite series, we have the last member of Team RWBY, our sunny, little dragon, Yang Xiao Long. Once again, I'd like to thank my friend Michaela Roan and RWBY Wonderland admin Blake Belladonna for their help in making this list. If you want to join RWBY Wonderland, click this link: https://www.facebook.com/rwbywonderland/. And, if you guys want to make sure you don't miss the next series of RWBY posts, subscribe to my RWBY mailing list: http://eepurl.com/cWX8Fj. But if you really want to show me the love, support me on Patreon: https://www.patreon.con/bryanclaesch.

Alright, then. Let's finish this bitch.



"Yang? Is that you?"

 1. "Oh! I'm so proud of my baby sister!"

Yang and Ruby make for interesting siblings. Their proportions are different, their weapons are different, their hair is different, hell, they don't even have the same last name. But despite these differences, Yang still looks out for Ruby with great enthusiasm and she's been doing so for a long time. While we aren't told exactly when, I would estimate that it has been somewhere between 10 to 12 years ago (since Volume 1) when Summer was killed. This effectively cemented Ruby and Yang together as they no longer had a mother to rely on. With Yang being the older and likely feeling guilty for nearly getting the both of them killed, it's apt to say that Yang has practically become a surrogate mother to Ruby.

Something that struck me the other day was that it's never mentioned why Yang thinks it's the best day ever that Ruby gets to go with her to Beacon. Most older siblings would be annoyed if their little brother or sister got moved so far ahead that they ended up going to school together. But not Yang--she's super excited about it. We could assume it's because Yang just has that upbeat of a personality, but it's more likely Yang is relieved that she won't have to leave Ruby behind to fend for herself. I mean, do you remember in Players and Pieces where the Nevermore filled the battlefield with its quills? Do you remember how Yang rushed to help Ruby, and then the tight hug she gave Ruby after Weiss saved her from the Deathstalker? Yang hugs Ruby a lot in Volume 1. Then there's the part in The Shining Beacon where Ruby mentions that Yang used to read to Ruby every night before bed, an activity that is usually performed by a parent.

Another strange thought I had was that because Ruby is so much like Summer and Summer was the only mother Yang ever knew, and so by cherishing Ruby the way she does, Yang is holding onto and cherishing the memory of Summer. No longer able to love her mother, Yang turns to her baby sister and makes sure to love Ruby the way Summer deserved. Hence, Yang becomes the over-doting big sister.

"Please, stop..."

 2. "I'm not asking you to stop. Just please, get some rest. Not just for you, but for the people you care about and who care about you."

Monty had an interesting idea behind introducing the characters of RWBY. It was his intention to make them all look like stock, one-dimensional characters, and then as the show went on, to fill them out. Not many writers have the balls to do that since most readers, editors, and publishers won't even give a writer the time to set something up like that. Once they look stock, no one thinks to read on or care about what happens to them in the story.

When we're introduced to Yang, she's supposed to come off as the super extraverted, quintessential party girl. Always looking for fun and always on the move. But Yang is more than that. She deeply cares about her friends and family, and their relationships are very important to her. Remember when she started crying in Destiny when she thought Blake didn't believe her for being attacked by Mercury? Yeah, a skin-deep, party girl wouldn't do that. A party girl also wouldn't have a never-ending search for the mother she never knew. While Yang could have lived her life as she saw fit and think of Raven as dead to her, she doesn't. Yang genuinely cares about her friends and family, and she feels the sting of rejection or disbelief quite deeply. All of which will make Yang and Blake's reunion very interesting to see.

3. "Wait! Yang! Is she alright?"

"Uh... She's uh... She's gonna be alright. I think she's just... I think it's just going to take some time for her to get used to things. She's too strong to let this stop her."

Yang is a strong girl. Physically, but also mentally. She has such a strong will that you could call her stubborn, such as in her fight against Neo. And while Yang did take some time getting used to only having one arm, she didn't let it interfere with her day-to-day to life, and she hated how her incident with Adam left her with PTSD. Not wanting to be pitied or looked after by Tai, she took a chance on the prosthetic arm from Atlas in an attempt to re-forge her life and achieve a degree of normality that was more normal than being without it. Something I've mentioned elsewhere is that a good indication of Yang's inner state is her hair since it's so important to her and her vision of self. When it was tied up, so was she. But when her hair flows freely, that's when she's ready to burn brighter than everyone else.

4. "Yes, Junior. I have several. But instead of 'sweetheart,' you can just call me 'sir!'"

You ever seen Persona 4: The Animation? Do you remember the scene where Yu and Yosuke are sharing a tent with Kanji and he gets irritated with them for thinking he's gay, so he declares he's going to go sleep with the girls since they had more balls than them? Yeah, Yang is one of those girls that Yu referred to when he said, "For some girls, that is true."

Whether you call it balls, confidence, daredeviltry, or brash, Yang isn't afraid of doing what needs to be done in order to achieve her objective. She'll grab a guy by the balls, she'll destroy his club, she openly declares that she'll be turning heads, and she'll put herself at risk to help her friends. Of course, though, if Yang can have fun while doing it, she's going to. Let's not forget how she giggled after being launched off the cliff in The First Step.

Yang's favorite ballet is the Nutcracker.

(Is it true that Barbara actually grabbed Jack's balls once?)

5. "You're Yang Xiao Long. My sunny, little dragon."

Whenever we see Yang, we usually see her smiling and having fun. She's very positive and upbeat, and very few things get to her. In fact, it's unusual to see her bothered by something or even hurting. When she was bested by Neo, lost to Adam, and Blake didn't believe her or worse, ran away, those were all difficult moments for her. She's not one to sweat the small stuff. She can even take a jab thrown her way about her arm and her hair. Yang is emotionally resilient, and she can almost always find a reason to smile.

I need a better system than Print Screen.

 6. Bumblebee

Did you honestly think I was talking about the ship? Well, if you read the Top 10 Reasons Why Blake Should Be Your Favorite Character you wouldn't have. (Maybe I'll do a blog post on why I hate the ship so much and why it's actually a terrible idea.)

But, anyway, Yang's got a bike. And bikes are pretty cool. While I may not like bikers for their impetuous attitudes, I find it difficult to squash my desire for a motorcycle. I have fond memories of being a kid and zipping around my neighbor on my bike. What could be better than strapping 1000 CC's of power to that experience. And so, just like with Ruby and scythes, the cool factor of Bumblebee helps make Yang cool(er). And as far as we've seen, she's a safe and responsible driver, but very capable and skilled when the time comes. Which is more than we can say for the Fake AH Crew and their talents on bikes. (To be fair though, most of those blunders are Gavin.)

7. This Porridge Is Too Cold

Just like how Ruby is a great interpretation of Little Red Riding Hood, Yang is a great interpretation of Goldilocks. In fact, I'd say Yang is a huge improvement on the original. For one, she isn't a stupid kid who committed a B&E, raided someone else's food, messed up the ass grooves on their favorite chairs, and then invited herself over for a slumber party. And the only notable thing about Goldilocks was that she was a dumb blonde and a criminal. Yang's neither of those things, and her hair has more meaning to who she is than just a color. Still though, I'd love a direct reference or joke back to Goldilocks in RWBY. The scene where she killed a couple of Ursas isn't enough.

8. "Laugh all you want. I'll be turning heads tomorrow night."

Well, I told you all it was coming, and here it is: Yang is the sexiest member of Team RWBY and possibly the whole show. Which is a bold statement considering Yang has some pretty stiff competition from the likes of Neo and Emerald. Hell, even Glynda has a number of very committed fans. But for me, the victor is Yang, and it's not just because of two very large and obvious reasons. She's got a great ass, too! No, I kid. Although it did look good in the Yellow Trailer. But the reason why I saw Yang is the sexiest character is because she has both a banging body and a fun personality. Everyone wants to have fun and we all prefer to be around pretty things rather than ugly, so that instantly makes Yang a winner across the board. True, my RWBY waifu is probably Weiss and Ruby is the most adorable, but who wouldn't want to at the very least date Yang? It'd be a good time.

Did you know that Monty based Yang's dress off one

Marilyn Monroe wore?

9. Dumbass: I'm a master of Karate! Hi-ya!

Smartass: I'm a master of Ka-chuk.

Dumbass: What's Ka-chuck?

Smartass: *Pulls out a shotgun and pumps it*

The Ember Celica. Who in their right mind would strap a shotgun to a gauntlet? I criticize, but just like combining a rifle with a scythe, it's actually a great idea. It combines a long range weapon with a short range one, and who wouldn't want to attach a shotgun to a gauntlet. I'm pretty sure a lot of people think the hidden blade from Assassin's Creed is one of the coolest things ever, so why not attach a shotgun to a gauntlet? Never mind the fact you're strapping a shotgun's recoil straight to your arm. But, hey, if we're going to get that picky, we're going to have to dismantle every weapon in RWBY. So let's just enjoy the Ember Celica as it is and imagine ourselves punching someone we really don't like with them.

10. "With each hit, she gets stronger. And she uses that energy to fight back. That's what makes her special."

Yang's semblance. The ability to take damage and then dish it back twice as hard. It's a pretty good one. Admittedly, it has some flaws and Yang isn't always strong enough to take the hit, but come on, she's a friggin' Super Saiyan! And what's more, she's a female Super Saiyan. There aren't any of those in DBZ, and if Yang could fire a Kamehameha (my autocorrect recognizes Kamehameha but not saiyan), it'd be the hypest shit. In fact, I'm kind of surprised no one has done any art of Yang using the Kamehameha. (Fan artists! Don't let me down!)

But anyway, we've all had those moments when we get so pissed, we give people that "You're so dead" face and we want the vehemence of our anger to be reflected in how hard we hit them. There'd probably be a lot fewer trolls if that was true. Too bad we aren't all Super Saiyans, but at least Yang is.

"Oh! Looks like Yang is angry. And you wouldn't like her when she's... upset."

 And there you have it. The Top 10 Reasons why Blake should be your favorite character. It you guys think I missed any, go ahead and add them in the comments below.

Keep writing, my friends.

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