#lilah's notes !

[fawnchives]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY GIRLIE 🫶🫶

THANK YOU MY LOVEEEE ! 🤍

[wriothesleysgf]

girly pops of tumblr dot com what do we want first

[ilykaveh]

moots can u pls interact with this if it's okay for me to tag you in stuff (like tag games or if i see fanart of ur fav!) and if u don't mind me randomly saying hi in ur inbox? 🥹 i have such bad social anxiety that even extends to interacting on here and i always feel like i'm bothering everyone

[feuerfliegen]

Muse Ages:

Hati: 32 Artair: 27 Nella: 24 Laney: 23 Kelseigh: 22 Eric: 26

[bratzforchris]

guess-m. sturniolo

SUMMARY: in which matt just can't stop thinking about your underwear ⋆𐙚₊˚⊹♡

PAIRING: softdom!matt x subfem!reader (part of my pony!reader au :3)

WARNINGS: smut (no intercourse), dirty talk, oral (f recieving), marking, fluffy aftercare!!

WORD COUNT: 1k

A NOTE FROM LILAH: pony!reader the woman that you are⋆˚ 𝜗𝜚˚⋆

You wanna guess the color of my underwear

You wanna know what I got going on down there

The way Matt had been eyeing you all day was undeniable. Ever since you had sported a short, white tennis skirt to the grocery store, Matt’s blue eyes had been roaming your body, trying to figure out what underwear you had underneath the miniskirt. He’d never admit it, but your boyfriend had a thing for lingerie. He loved buying you all different kinds of sets and then getting to guess which one you had on that day.

“Matt, what do you want for dinner?” You asked him, manicured hand coming up to the cabinet to search for something to make for your evening meal. 

“Whatever you wanna make, doll.” Matt hummed nonchalantly, eyes focused more on the heart-shape of your ass than the words that were coming out of your mouth. 

“My eyes are up here.” You joked, feeling the brunette’s eyes watching your backside. 

Is it pretty in pink or all see-through?

Is it showing off my brand new lower back tattoo?

The more you bustled around the kitchen, preparing things for dinner, the more Matt’s imagination ran wild. He couldn’t stop thinking about you in two of his favorite sets, the crotch of the panties already wet with your arousal, just from him dirty talking to you. One of his favorites was pale, baby pink, perfectly accentuating your skin tone (and the fuzzy, pink handcuffs you loved so much), while the other was made of skimpy, white lace that was so see-through, he could practically watch your clit swell as he rubbed circles on your inner thighs. These thoughts, combined with the fact that your cropped baby tee was showing off the new bow that had just been tattooed on your back last week, was enough to make the crotch of your boyfriend’s jeans become uncomfortably tight. 

You wanna put 'em in your mouth, pull 'em all down south

As you slid your lasagna into the oven, Matt had reached his breaking point. The thought that really pushed him over the edge was the way he’d grip your panties with his teeth, sliding them down the curve of your plushy thighs before he plunged into your pussy, devouring it like it was his last meal. 

You had been completely out of touch with Matt’s horniness, oblivious to just how badly he wanted to tongue fuck you at the moment. Without warning, you were being thrown over the brunette’s shoulder and carried into the bedroom, wriggling in his strong grasp. 

“Matt!” You squealed. “Dinner’s in the oven!”

“I think forty-five minutes is plenty of time for me, princess.” 

Without another word, your boyfriend laid you down on the plushy, white comforter that you had picked out for your shared bed. Matt practically ripped your skirt off, tossing the garment somewhere on the bedroom floor. The brunette began to kiss and suck his way down your tummy, leaving hickeys in his wake that claimed you as his girl. 

By the time Matt reached your lacy, baby pink panties, the arousal was taking over him. He gripped the little white bow in his teeth, quickly pulling your panties off the curve of your hips and down your legs. The brunette smirked to himself when he felt the wet patch in the crotch of the fabric, knowing that just the kisses on your tummy had done this to you. 

“Mmmm, Matt,” You whimpered, tangling your hands in his hair as he kissed your inner thighs. “Stop teasin’.”

“You wanna talk about teasing, doll?” Matt chuckled, licking a stripe up your pussy with the flat of his tongue before pulling back. “Let’s talk about you wearing that tiny skirt all day. Makin’ me all hard ‘n shit.”

You moaned at the dirty talk, rutting your hips closer to Matt’s body. “Mmmm, please.” You whined. 

Try it, bite it, lick it, spit it

Pull it to the side and get all up in it

Without another word, Matt dove into your pussy, taking tentative, teasing tastes. He began to slowly eat you out, his tongue exploring your swelling clit and dripping hole. You moaned at the sensations, gripping onto your boyfriend’s brown curls as you practically fucked his face. Every now and then, Matt would add a cheeky little bite on your sensitive bud, making you squeal with pleasure.

“‘M gonna cum.” You whimpered, your back arching up off the bed. 

“Already, sweetheart? I’m just getting started.” Matt hummed against your pussy, running the flat of his tongue against your swollen pussy. 

Your eyes were already rolling back in your head, mind hazy with lust as Matt spit on his fingers, pulling your lips to the side and beginning to finger you. His hand motions were rough and fast, making the ball in your tummy tighten. 

“Oh…oh god,” You panted. “Matt, mmmmm.”

He was fully indulged in you now, mouth devouring your pussy while his fingers worked on your clit and dripping hole. The pleasure was unlike anything you had experienced before as you tangled your hands in Matt’s hair, equal parts hating and loving how he was edging you. 

“Fuck, you taste so fuckin’ good, doll.” Matt mumbled greedily. 

“‘M gonna cum, Matt.” You whimpered. 

“Go ahead, baby,” he hummed. “Cum all over my fuckin’ face. Do it f’me.”

You didn’t need to be told twice. You immediately let go, your body pulsating with your orgasm. It was probably one of the strongest climaxes you had ever had, wave after wave of pleasure taking over your body. After a while, you went limp against the sheets, panting and fucked out as Matt licked his lips and chin. 

“You taste so fuckin’ good, pretty girl,” he mumbled, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. “You like that?”

You nodded, your legs still shaking with the after effects of your orgasm. Matt chuckled, before heading to the bathroom to wash his hands and get a wipe to clean you off. You were still completely out of it as your boyfriend crawled into bed beside you after cleaning you up. You immediately curled into the soft fabric of his crewneck as your breathing returned to normal.

“All because you wanted to tease me and make me guess what underwear you had on” Matt chuckled, running a strong hand along your body. 

You curled further into your boyfriend’s side with a soft giggle, enjoying the peace. All was well for a few moments until you suddenly sat up. “Shit! I forgot about dinner!”

tags ♡: @blahbel668 @mattsturnswhore @sofieeeeex @jetaimevous @pkfferoo @idekman1231 @svphscc @littlestar44 @https-roman @flow3rsturns13 @supercoolgirl69 @hearts4chriss @urprobablyscuffed @pepsiluvr0209 @vsigishishis @addiestarx @sturn1ololuvr @sturnclouds @memea32221 @hoes4matthew @whoreformatthewsturniolo @facingreailitysgravity @sturnsmia @sturnobsessedwh0re @sturniolos-f4n @nicksbestie @muwapsturniolo

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[7seas-of-ryy]

You Did What?!

Author’s Note: I'm currently working on part 2 of Come Back To Me! For now enjoy this drabble that was inspired by this :)

Summary: There was still so much that Cassian and Azriel didn't know about you

Pairing: Azriel x Reader

Warnings: talks of killing, let me know if I need to add any others :)

“Go ahead, tell him.” Azriel told you.

“It was me. I killed the group of Illyrians.” You admitted.

“What?! I wanted you to tell him you ate the last muffin. You killed a group of Illyrians?!”Azriel’s eyes bulged from his head as he yelled.

“It was you?? YOU ATE THE LAST MUFFIN?!” Cass shouted.

You held up a finger to Azriel, letting him know you’d answer him in a second. Then you turned to Cassian to answer his question first.

“Damn right I ate the last muffin and guess what? It was delicious!” You told him with a smug look on your face.

“How could you?! I thought we were friends!” Cass cried.

“Do you remember when you ate my brownie and I told you I would get payback??” You asked, eerily calm.

His eyebrows raised, jaw dropped, and a gasp left his mouth.

“That was THREE years ago!” He retorted.

“Never cross me.” You warned the male in front of you.

A look of horror grew on Cassian’s face. Azriel stood in between the two of you looking back and forth. His eyes still wide in disbelief.

“Are we just going to ignore that she killed a group of Illyrians on her own?!” The shock still evident in his voice.

“It was the last few soldiers from the camp that had sided with Amarantha under the mountain. You guys hunted all of the other groups down and I wanted to help!” You defended yourself.

The shadowsinger just stared at you in surprise, Cass still stood there eyeing you cautiously.

“Now that everthing is cleared up, can I go?” You questioned with expectant eyes.

They both stood, dumbfounded and shook their heads up and down. You walked out with a smile on your face, content with the entire conversation.

Once she was gone, both males spoke at the exact same time.

“I’m so terrified of her.” Cassian said.

“I’m so in love with her.” Az stated.

Let me know if you want to be added to the taglist :)

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@miadialila @knittedchapters @wxhxixtxexroses @ivy-34 @littlepippilongstocking

[thehighladywrites]

— “I gotta tell you something…”

☀︎ — pairing: nerd azriel x bimbo reader

☀︎ — summary: a peek into your conversations with nerd az💗

☀︎ — warnings: mature language, crack, azriel using 😄 unironically ugh he is so cute 😞😞😞

☀︎ — amara’s note: i loved making this help

series masterlist

🏷️: @vbbaby-girl @whatdoyxumean @honeybeeboobaa@thescooby-gang @linoisqt @mischiefmanagers @tortured-artists @to-be-written @sidthedollface2 @stasiereads @amara-moonlight @scoobies @caroline-books @kalulakunundrum @meshelleexplosionmurder @danikamariewrites @claireswritingcorner @redbleedingrose @jeannineee @nocasdatsgay @liati2000 @teenageeggscissorslawyer @impossibelle @stonerpersona @dreamlandreader @djaaaa @cadiawrites @thelov3lybookworm @polli05927 @ahitsalyssa @evergreenlark @thegirlintheshadows101 @saltedcoffeescotch @acourtofladydeath @acourtofwhatthefuck @readychilledwine @daycourtofficial @azriels-shadowsinger @sapphicmsmarvel @hungryforbatboys @justasillylittlegoofyguy @luvmoo @emryb @meritxellao @mochibabycakes @artists-ally @azzieslittlebunny @berryzxx @sweetshifter @lilah-asteria @hannzoaks @throneofsmut @lipstickmarks

[daycourtofficial]

I got cursed like Eve got bitten - part IX

Pairing: Azriel x Rhysand's sister!reader | WC: 500 | Warnings: none

Summary: reports of a rare powered fae popping up in Illyria send Azriel and Rhysand on a journey through the past, unraveling a truth they thought long buried

Previous part | Next part | Masterlist

Rhys sat in his office, a cold cup of untouched tea on his desk as he reviewed a new trade agreement when Feyre walked into his office. He perked up, leaning back in his chair, arms wide in invitation. She opted to sit across from him instead, a spark of annoyance shooting at him down the bond.

“Rhys, we have a problem.”

“Of course we do, you’re sitting over there instead of in my lap.”

Feyre rolled her eyes, her arms crossing over her chest as she looked at Rhys, straightening in his chair.

“Your sister thinks you hate her.”

His scoff annoyed her further. “Don’t be ridiculous darling.” His gaze shot back down to the paper on his desk, trying to read it once more. 

“Am I? You’ve avoided interacting with her the entire time she’s been here.”

“That’s absurd, I have not. I speak to her daily.”

Feyre leaned back in her chair, eyes assessing. “Tell me any and all interesting conversations you’ve had with her that weren’t about her training.”

Rhys stayed silent, a scowl on his face at Feyre. The two stared each other down until Rhys put his papers down again, straightening them on his desk.

“You don’t understand, Feyre.”

“Help me understand, Rhys. Help her understand.” She leaned forward, watching Rhys fiddle with the parchment.

“You don’t have to understand, it’s my responsibility.”

“She’s my sister now, too. That means she’s partially my responsibility. And the way it looks to me is her brother is ignoring her.”

Rhys’s hands moved to his hair, tucking the strands, looking to the floor as he spoke. “They were my responsibility.” He took a shaky breath. “She has been my responsibility even after I thought she was gone, she’s been out there, Mother knows what was happening to her while I didn’t even look for her!”

His voice was getting louder, but his tone was almost pleading with the power to go back, to just look again.

“How could you have known?” Feyre’s voice was similar to what you’d use to calm a feral cat.

“I could have opened the box! Neither of us opened it, but it was my responsibility as her brother to prove she was gone. I never opened it because I was a coward.”

“You saw a body! I wouldn’t have opened the box, either.”

“I should have known it wasn’t her!” 

He stopped, taking in a deep breath. “All these years, I haven’t even had an inkling of something strange occurring. I never thought to dig deeper. I failed her.”

“You failed her as much as I failed my sisters. The difference is I didn’t let them think I hated them.”

He rubbed his eyes, looking at his mate. “You can feel like you failed her then, but every minute you spend avoiding her because of your feelings, you are failing her again and again.”

Rhys put his face in his hands, not noticing or not caring when Feyre shut the door behind her.

Author’s note: short little chapter for yall ❤️

Permanent taglist: @vanilla-seabass @cyrygher @lees-chaotic-brain @topaz125 @chessebookgirl @fides25 @lady-of-tearshed @ashbatz @fxckmiup @lilah-asteria @justvibbinghere @daughterofthemoons-stuff @mybestfriendmademe @heartless-tate @tsunami-of-tears @idrkwhatthisisimsorry @olive-main @azrielsmate3 @pit-and-the-pen @durgenyx @dee-writes-smut @chairofchaos @throneofsmut @kennedy-brooke @prythianpages @itsswritten @acotarxreader @milswrites @the-golden-jhope @hannzoaks @secretlyhers @tothestarsandwhateverend @sarawritestories @chxosangxl

Azriel taglist: @brieflyclassymortal @thisiskaylin @magicstrengthandcourage

I got cursed series taglist: @doodlebugg16-blog @ceoofyearning @saltedcoffeescotch @acourtofbatboydreams @willowpains @anarchiii @i-am-infinite @bsenpai @sstrohma @teenagellamaangel @allthatisbuck1917 @elsie-bells @rcarbo1 @pruvii @whyshouldihaveanam3 @sleepylunarwolf

Thanks for reading ❣️

[scorpioriesling]

Invisible String - Part 2

･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *

Pairing(s): Eris x reader

Warning(s): light angst if you squint. Please be advised; future parts might not be suitable for all audiences. Proceed with caution.

Summary: You'd taken the nanny position for the royal family over a year ago, not expecting what would come of it or how close you'd grow to the child you cared for. Things became tough for Eris when his wife left him and his daughter, and he found it increasingly harder to raise Riley himself. He soon realizes, you've provided a lot more than the typical job description duties for his daughter... and maybe for him, too.

SR’s Note: I added in the advisory so that younger / uncomfortable readers won't begin the series without knowing or expecting potential risks in content to come. For those who enjoy or look forward to content as such -- get excited! Nonetheless, I hope readers will enjoy this series that came to me in a dream one night. (; Much love to all.

Tags: @cynthiesjmxazrielslover @talesofadragon @rcarbo1 @mandziaaa @lilah-asteria @a-frog-with-a-laptop @kitsunetori (inbox me or comment if you'd like to be added!)

･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *

You paced back and forth awkwardly around your room, not sure what to do with your time. Normally, you'd give Riley a bath and see her off to bed -- but not tonight. Her father had come home during dinner today, and you almost couldn't believe your eyes when he'd materialized before the both of you in the dining room.

Gods, you'd never seen her so excited to see him come home in all the time you'd known the two. She truly missed him when he was gone, just waiting to see her dad come home at the end of the day. You understood; to be honest, you worried some nights when he would be gone late, always apologizing like his timing was the end of the world. He failed to realize that it was his safe return you were more concerned with.

You paused, shrieks of laughter heard from the opposite end of the Wing and you smiled to yourself. Padding over to your open doorway, you peeked your head out, listening as Eris' faint voice spoke with his daughter, saying something that had her giggling once more before you heard the distinct sound of her door latching shut. You retreated back into your room, trying to find anything to busy yourself as the sound of his shoes drew nearer toward your room.

"Could I offer any help with the last of those?" Eris asks, leaning casually against the doorframe as he gestures toward the stack of heavy boxes piled in the corner of your room. You turn, crossing your arms and then uncrossing them, not quite finding a comfortable position.

"Um... well, I could probably get them, tomorrow." You shrug, biting on your lower lip. Eris' eyes study your face for a long moment before he chuckles, walking over to the pile and pushing up his sleeves with such grace. He lifts the top box, his arms flexing under the weight as he adjusts his grip under the edges.

You try, really, really hard not to stare.

"I'll leave these outside to be picked up in the morning, unless you needed them to be kept for something?" He asks, and you all but shake your head before he heads out of your room, leaving you in awe. You shake your head, get it together. That is your boss, for Gods sakes. You take a deep breath, pushing your hair behind your ears before reaching for the next highest box, barely reaching the upper rim before its contents nearly spill over on top of you.

"Cauldron damned-" your curse is cut off when the box doesn't completely dump out on to you, but is caught haphazardly between your hands and one of Eris'. His other one is wrapped around your waist, preventing your impending collision with the floor.

"Woah! Woah," he says, his voice much closer than you expected and you open your eyes you'd inadvertently squeezed shut. He loomed over you, holding you so close to his chest that you sucked in a breath, your eyes widening when they met his peering down at you.

"I'm..." you made to stand, and he lifted the cardboard from your hands. "I thought I could help with that one." You said sheepishly. He chuckled, glancing sidelong at you.

"Always trying to do everything," he muttered. "Honestly, I'm just surprised to hear Y/N actually say a bad word out loud."

You set your hands on your hips, raising an eyebrow and ignoring his teasing remark.

"This is my mess, anyhow. I was just trying to help."

He turns, heading for the door once more.

"Allow me to help you for once, hm?" He says, winking and walking out. You roll your eyes, irritated at how warm your cheeks feel. You flit about the room, putting random smaller items away and folding a few articles of clothing as Eris makes the last few trips. When he comes back in for the final time, he sits on the edge of your bed with a sigh, running a hand through his hair.

You look to him, noticing his exhaustion from the day again. "Thank you," you say, and he looks to you again. He offers you a small smile, leaning back on his hands.

"For all that you've done, helping you move a few boxes is incomparable." Your lips curve upward as you place a few more of your skirts inside the drawers of the dresser, averting his eye. After a few shared moments of quiet, he speaks again.

"This room... its... I'm glad someone is using it again." He says, his hand running softly over the duvet. You glance at him, his fallen expression puzzling as you go about tidying up.

"Oh?"

He's quiet again before he looks at you. "I used to avoid coming in here, after... well, after Selene left." He says quietly, and you pause. The air feels thick, you try to keep breathing evenly as your mind races.

"She... the two of you didn't share...?"

"No." He whispers, looking at the floor. "She thought only mates should share a room."

You shoved the drawer closed, walking slowly to the bedside and sitting next to him.

"I'm sure this is common knowledge by now, but our marriage was simply a transaction, a sign of goodwill between our courts." He let out a humorless laugh. "No magic, golden thread there."

For everything he'd done for his court, all the battles he'd won, every fight he'd fought and all he'd witnessed... this was a subject he rarely discussed, as it seemed tomdrag him down the most.

"Eris..." You said softly, reaching out a hand timidly and placing it on his arm. He braced lightly against the touch, and you leaned closer. "I'm so sorry that you were treated that way-"

He sniffed, his hand rubbing along his jaw quickly before he stood, your outstretched hand slowly retracting with the distance between you two.

"It's alright. Nothing for you to worry about, anyway." He flashed a humorless half-smile, and you stared up at him with concern. You could tell it was a tough subject for him, and you definately didn't want to pry; but he didn't exactly have many other people to open up to.

"Well... alright then." You say defeatedly. He nods, turning and heading for the door. He looks over his shoulder only once more before closing the door behind him.

"Sleep well, Y/N."

･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

"Apple juice, please?" Riley asks, and you pour her a fresh glass, delivering it to her awaiting hand. She sips quietly, then blinks a few times when you sit down beside her. "Oh -- thanks!" She smiles.

You nod, silently praising her good mannered habits. You could still remember when you arrived at the Forest House, the little spitfire was ordering people around at the ripe age of three. "Give this!" and "Do that!" was all she managed, and though her heart was pure, you did encourage better etiquitte; luckily, it stuck.

"Daddy said he have a surprise," she swung her legs under the table, some of her juice swishing in her cup. You raised an eyebrow.

"Did he, now?" You weren't sure what she was talking about, or if there really was a surprise at all. Eris had made haste this morning, rushing past you this morning on his way out the door. He'd barely kissed his daughter goodbye before he was on his horse and halfway to the border-

"He did! He said he had one." She insisted, and you nodded in understanding. What it could be, you had no clue.

"Well, lets finish our dinner so we're ready when he gets home, yes?" You suggest, and Riley agrees, jamming the last of her chicken nuggets into her mouth and chewing with maximum effort. You shake your head, smiling at just how normal the girl was. You were just glad she found joy in chicken nuggets still, and didn't request challenging dishes every meal quite yet.

Insisting on wearing her fluffy pink footie pajamas, Rylie then sat in your lap on the couch, her stuffed beagle clutched in her hands as you brushed out her wet-clean locks.

"Braid it pretty?" She asks, and you leaned in, kissing the top of her little head. She grinned, holding her little beagle's head to her lips and kissing it's head just the same.

"Anything for you, Riles," you say, getting to work on the long strawberry strands. She sits very patiently for a four year old; that is, until you've secured the band at the end of your work and the front door creaks open.

"Daddy!" She's up in an instant, running to the door with glee and clinging to her father's leg the moment she spots him. You stay seated a moment longer, listening from the living area but not quite ready to see Eris yet. After the tense conversation last night, you couldn't help but feel... awkward, after the conversation.

After a few minutes, Riley has retreated to the living room looking rather dejected. Your brows knit as she stalks toward you, her beagle hanging limply from her fingers.

"Daddy says bedtime. You take me please?" She says, looking down at the floor. You frown, your hands lifting under her arms as she wraps her legs around your waist.

"Of course sweetie," you try to sound upbeat, but she only lays her head on your shoulder. You pet her head, wrapping your other hand around her to keep her propped up against your waist as you make your way to her end of the Wing. You look around as you go, not seeing any sign of Eris on your way. He literally just got home, what the Hell could he possibly have to do right now?

Once you reach her room, you place her gently atop her plush duvet, her eyes half closed when her head touches the pillow. You pull a loose blanket over her legs, knowing sometimes she gets cold at night, and kiss her little cheek one last time before moving toward the door.

"Y/N," she whispers. Your eyes meet hers in the dim light, your fingers stalling as they reach for the glowing tableside lamp.

"Yes dear?"

"Can you please read? Please?" Her bottom lip trembles. "D-daddy always reads... he reads my book..." she sucks in a breath of air, and you rush over to her bed, taking her little hand in yours.

"Yes, of course honey!" You say, hoping she will feel better. "I would love to read you a story," you look left and right, searching for any tomes near her bed. She lifts a limp hand, her finger pointing to the book resting at the opposite end of her bed.

"You'd like that one? The Kissing Hand?" She nods, one tear slipping free and running down her cheek. You hastily grab the book, and she scoots over, making a space for you to lay beside her. You scoot close, reaching an arm around her and she snuggles close as you flip open the book. Her little fingers wipe her tear from her cheek, and you begin to read.

･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

You weren't sure when you'd drifted off, but when you slipped back into consciousness, your back ached from its cramped position on the small bed. You looked around, the darkened room coming into view as well as the peacefully sleeping babe next to you.

You must have fallen asleep reading to her, you thought. Surely you'd left the lamp on though; its glow would come in handy now as you tried to slip silently out of her embrace, sneaking out in absolute darkness. At least the door was still cracked open.

You'd stumbled around quietly enough and made it down the hallway to the kitchen, the clock on the wall coming into view.

Four in the morning. Gods.

You kept walking, feeling along the walls until you found your bedroom door, and let yourself inside.

･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

You woke up that morning to the delicious smell of cinnamon and sugar, the comfort of your plush bed surrounding you as the first light of day drifted through your curtains. You yawned, stretching out your arms and slowly opening your eyes.

Ahh, what a lovely morning.

Morning. The sun was out.

You threw the covers off of you hastily, your bare feet hitting the cold wood floors in a rush as you lunged for your door handle. Riley was surely awake by now, and surely starving. You bounded down the hallway, your steps faltering when you heard her familiar ramblings from the kitchen and registered the smell of food wafting through the air.

As you approached, you watched in pure shock as Eris stood over the kitchen island, his hand holding his daughters as he helped her spread icing over a tray of steaming cinnamon rolls, smiling and talking along with her. He hadn't noticed you walk in; but she sure did.

"Y/N! Finally! You're awake!" She squealed happily, and you forced a smile, still confused by the scene before you. Eris looked up then, his eyes meeting yours only briefly before he went back to the treats he was making.

"Good morning Riley," you said hesitantly, stepping closer toward the island. Eris' eyes flicked up again, snagging on the silk pajamas you'd changed into before collapsing onto your bed last night. You crossed your arms over your chest.

"Good morning. Eris." You said, and his mouth pressed into a thin line.

"Morning Y/N." He said plainly before turning to Riley, lifting her off the counter and setting her on the ground.

"Bunny, why don't you set the table," he handed her the silverware and a few plates. "And we'll join you in just a few minutes?" She nods, skipping into the dining room, as Eris braces his hands against the countertop, his eyes locked on yours once more.

You stare back, shrugging when you can't understand the point of standing in silence. "What?" You ask. He sighs, biting the inside of his cheek.

"Y/N, I'm sorry for the... discussion. We had. The other night, it was... highly, unprofessional." He nodded, looking down at the pan of cinnamon rolls once more. You raised an eyebrow, a soft laugh erupting from your lips and causing him to flick his gaze to you again.

"What is funny?" He asks, seeming a bit taken aback.

"Nothing, no," you say, smiling softly at him. "I just... Eris, I live in your home. I spend every day with your daughter. I think we're beyond professional, aren't we?" You say. He cocks his head to the side, a small smirk curving the side of his lips.

"I suppose we are, then."

･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

"Daddy. These cimanim rolls. Are. Delicious!" Riley grins with delight, Eris' expression a mirror of his daughter sitting next to him at the table. You watch the two and your heart swells; one day, you could only dream of having something so special as that.

"Why, thank you Princess!" Eris says, and she holds her chin high. You shake your head at her, and Eris' eyes meet yours, his face giving away exactly what he's thinking. After a few more quiet moments, he speaks up again.

"Bunny, I wanted to ask you about doing something fun today," he says, and Riley immediately perks up.

"Fun?" She asks, and he nods.

"In the Town Square, there is the Autumn Festival, and it would make me very happy as your daddy if you would go with me-"

"Yesss!" She shrieks, every single one of her teeth showing as she smiles in excitement. You can't help but feel so happy for her -- she deserves time with her father, and he's finally home to spend it with her, doing something she had been longing to do anyway.

"Ohmygosh I can't wait! I will wear my Princess dress so everyone knows I am a Princess, okay," she explains hastily, only pausing to take a sip from her glass of milk.

Eris nods, looking to you. "I figured you may appreciate at least a day off as well," he adds quietly, and you offer him a gentle smile. Truly, you didn't need one, but you appreciated his consideration all the same. Riley doesn't quite catch the incinuation, though.

"Y/N, you have to wear a dress. You can't borrow from me this time because you're too big," she says, hopping from her chair. "You have a dress?" She asks. Your eyes meet her dad's and his mouth opens to answer first.

"Bunny," he starts. "I don't think Y/N was going to come today," he explains. Rileys brows knit in confusion as she looks at him.

"Why not?"

"Well," he says, trying to tread lightly. "Maybe Y/N has other things she would like to do today. It's okay though; just me and you can go." He says, but Riley looks to you, her eyes looking you up and down.

"What... what else do you want to do though?" She says, and you chuckle.

"Riley, honey, today you can go have fun with your daddy, alright? Me and you play here everyday," You reason with her. She doesn't let up, and Eris studies you from across the table.

"Daddy -- can Y/N just come too?" Riley says. You sigh, looking to Eris for help, but he only stares quietly at you, a small smile on his lips.

"I really will just stay here-"

"Yes." Eris says, and you meet his eyes, Riley spinning in happy little circles at the end of the table. "Y/N can absolutely come with us today."

･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

[megalony]

Bedroom Talk- Part 2

This is an Eddie Diaz imagine, based on a request. I'm so happy and thankful so many of you have loved this little series and I am open to writing a 3rd part if anyone would like that or has ideas.

Please let me know what you think.

Taglist: @justagirlthatlovedtoread @musicistheway @avada-kedavra-bitch-187 @luula @missdreamofendless @bradleybeachbabe @woderfulkawaii  @amberpanda99 @daggersquadphantom @marvel-and-chicago-fan @angryknightstatesmantrash @minjix @lyjen @kmc1989 @itsmytimetoodream @noonenuts @hiireadstuff @ashie-babie @classyunknownlover @jayyeahthatsme @sp1ritssz @dumb-fawkin-bitch @oliverstarksbae @gimatida @heart-35 @supernaturalstilinski @stefansalvatoresgf @kyky9103 @wutheringhearts2275 @gay4hotmilfs @itshamleth @chaoticnosleepinfluencer @gs29 @wh0reforsmutstuff @mel-vaz @natashamea18 @chrisevansdaughter @alexandra8484 @deena-beena-weena @targaryenluvs @shelbygeek @kpoplover-19 @marvelmenarebeautiful @gillybear17

Eddie Diaz Masterlist

Series Masterlist

Summary: Eddie and (Y/n) have a heart to heart when (Y/n) talks about having another baby. But Eddie can't go through that trauma again, not after last time.

Enjoy.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A shiver coursed down (Y/n)'s spine when she heard the front door open and close.

Oh God. This was it. Now or never. She was going to have to talk to him; she was going to have to tell him.

She kept her back to the kitchen door and stayed stood in front of the fridge, pretending to look for something when really, she was staring into an abyss. Her breathing momentairely stopped while her eyes zoned out and all she could see was the doctor's office she had been sat in this morning.

Her mind zoned out enough that the blinking light in the fridge and the quiet, distressed beeping didn't phase her or break through the static in her ears. Her hand stayed curled around the fridge door and her head tilted to one side.

At least with her back to the door, Eddie wouldn't see the tears welling up in her eyes.

The sound of his trainers clashing against the kitchen floor finally snapped through to (Y/n)'s brain and made her slam the fridge shut before the temperature began to drop.

She stayed rooted to the spot, even when she felt a familiar pair of arms encase her waist and pin her up against his chest. Her head flopped to the left, pressing her cheek against Eddie's hair that was damp and fluffy like a feather pillow. Her hands moved down to hold onto his wrists while he gave her a tight squeeze and attached his lips to the side of her neck.

"Hi baby." He murmured softly into her neck while (Y/n) closed her eyes to try and stay calm and compose herself.

She took note of the shirt Eddie was wearing, she could feel the material rubbing against her bare arms. He had changed out of his gym gear. He was no longer wearing the rubbery vest top or training shorts he left in this morning. he was in a softer, thinner cotton shirt and a pair of jeans. He must have had a long workout to change at the gym instead of when he got home.

"Hi," She didn't trust her voice but she tried her best to sound calm and she kissed his head, nuzzling her nose into his hair to try and control her nerves.

"Where are the kids?"

Eddie realised he couldn't hear the tv or hear Lilah screaming and babbling loudly as she played with her toys. And Chris wasn't in the living room, and he couldn't hear their eldest playing any games in his bedroom either. The house was oddly quiet and that meant the kids weren't here because if they were outside, (Y/n) would of been out there with them.

"Buck's taken them to the zoo." (Y/n) had only asked Evan if he could watch the kids for an hour or two, but he had happily come round to pick them up. And as soon as Chris asked if they could go out, Evan was bubbling with excitement and ready to take him and Lilah to the zoo.

She knew Evan had guessed something was playing on her mind and that something was wrong, but he didn't pry. He took the kids the moment she asked and gave her a comforting hug before he left.

"Oh… so you're mine for the afternoon then. What'd you wanna do?" Eddie moved his hands down to (Y/n)'s hips and turned her around in his grip so they were facing one another.

He didn't see her face for very long before she pushed up on her toes to lock her arms around his neck and pull him down to her. He felt her nose brush across his neck and tickle the base of his shoulder and he grinned into her hair. His hands moved around to curl back around her waist and he began gliding his hand up and down her back.

He didn't realise Evan wanted to see the kids today, not that he was complaining. It was never an issue when Evan wanted to take the kids out, and it was a surprise to find that he could have (Y/n) to himself for the day. It had been a while since he'd had her to himself and didn't have to fight for her attention without the kids bustling in.

They stayed tangled together like that for a few quiet minutes and Eddie felt his smile fading against her hair when (Y/n) didn't say anything. She just held him. And he stayed wrapped around her, she felt like she needed some comfort, although he couldn't fathom why.

Eventually, just as Eddie was about to say something, (Y/n) pulled back. Her fingers tangled in the short hair at the base of his head and made a shiver run down his neck when she tightened her grip. She took him by surprise and leaned up to connect their lips. The kiss was heavy and burdened and demanding and needy all at once.

It took Eddie by surprise and knocked him on his back foot. He felt like this was a silent message he was supposed to decode, but he didn't know how.

He parted his lips, inhaling as deep a breath as he could manage before he dove down and stole her lips as demanding as she had initiated with him. His fingers dug deep into her hips and he felt her back curve against his hand as she leaned back and let him push her down. His chest moulded against hers and he groaned, tracing his tongue across hers when she scratched the base of his neck.

(Y/n) could see stars dancing across Eddie's face when they finally pulled up for air. His chest panted along with hers and a mixture of confusion and lust pooled in his eyes.

Why had she kissed him so desperately like that? Why was she looking at him worriedly like that? Why wasn't she talking to him?

He stayed still but loose and easily moveable, tilting his head down to watch the way (Y/n) laced her fingers with his and clung to his sweating palm.

When she walked ahead of him, Eddie let her drag him behind her, gripping her hand tight while his other hand cupped her hip again, softer and lighter this time. His chest moved near her back, keeping only a hairline fracture of space between them as he followed (Y/n) wordlessly out of the kitchen.

He wondered for a moment if she was about to divert down the hall towards the bedroom, but he followed and turned with her when she aimed for the living room instead.

Eddie studied the way (Y/n) sat down and pulled her legs up beneath her so they were crossed on the sofa, all while her left hand kept the tightest grip on him so his knuckles were turning deathly white. He twisted his arm a little so he could slowly sit down on the sofa beside her.

His gaze dragged up and down her frame, soaking her in, assessing the worry in her eyes, the tension in her body. The way she held her back straight like she was too nervous to slouch into the sofa. His tongue dragged across his lips that were still tingling from the power she had when she kissed him.

"Baby…?" He didn't quite know what he was asking or what he wanted to say, but (Y/n) seemed to understand his wordless question.

She dragged his hand across so their entangled hands were laid on her thigh, allowing (Y/n) to trace her thumb over the back of his hand. And bring her right hand up to draw aimless patterns and random designs on the back of Eddie's wrist and along his arm towards his tattoo.

"The doctor's office called me this morning, they got my bloods through and they wanted to see me."

"That was quick…" Eddie wasn't sure he liked where this was going. It had scarcely been two days since (Y/n) went to the doctors for a check up.

He knew she had to have bloods taken every few months for her vitamin deficiency. And she had to have check ups every six months to make sure she was okay on the contraceptive pill. The last time she was on the pill it messed with her system and made her sick.

If the doctors called back this quick and wanted an appointment on the same day, Eddie knew that was a sign that something was wrong.

"They gave me an emergency appointment this morning… Eddie I- I'm pregnant."

All (Y/n) could feel was the way her heart was pounding against her chest so harshly every beat felt like a hammer to her chest. Every pulse tore through her eardrums and made pins and needles course down to her feet. Her fingertips turned numb and both hands started to sweat, despite her fingers turning cold from panic and dread.

This news wasn't going to go down well, (Y/n) knew that from the start.

This wasn't like with Chris. This wasn't (Y/n) sitting Eddie down and giving him a gift of a baby onesie and a positive pregnancy test or telling him that she needed him to be careful in the army because he had two people to come home to now.

And it wasn't her waking him up on father's day and telling him he was going to have another baby.

They had agreed, no more kids.

(Y/n) was on the pill for that very reason and they were always careful. If Lilah's pregnancy was anything to go by, they couldn't have a repeat of that. As much as they loved their kids and would love to expand their family, it wasn't a risk they could say was worth taking.

Her labour with Chris had gone south. Her whole pregnancy with Lilah had been nine months from Hell and that birth almost killed her. It wasn't something Eddie wanted to witness again, he couldn't risk losing a baby or losing (Y/n) and bringing up their kids on his own. He wouldn't survive losing her.

Tears began to trickle down the bridge of (Y/n)'s nose and across her cheeks when Eddie didn't say anything.

He let her deadlock his hand in both her palms and he stayed limp and let her lift his arm to pin his hand to her chest to try and keep herself calm. But (Y/n) watched the way Eddie dragged his free hand across his jaw and down his chin.

The rage was visible in his eyes, but it wasn't directed at her. Eddie wasn't sure who or what he wanted to direct his anger at. Probably himself. He had let this happen. He told himself- he vowed he wouldn't go through another pregnancy, he wouldn't risk (Y/n)'s life like that again.

Now he'd put her in danger. Now she was pregnant he was going to see her deteriorate and worry about coming home to find her bleeding out or passed out on the floor. Or worry about going into labour and coming out without his wife or child at the end of it. What had he done?

"Eddie…" (Y/n) tilted her head down and pressed her lips against his knuckles when he didn't say anything. He just stared down at her legs like he would suddenly find the answers and the words he was looking for if he didn't look her in the eye.

"You're sure?"

"Yeah. Close to fifteen weeks, they think. I- I didn't want the ultrasound without you, so I'm at the hospital next week."

(Y/n) let them do another blood test and an exam and she got checked over by the doctor, but she wouldn't agree to a scan. She wasn't waiting around in the office for an hour, drinking two pints of water and watching the scan when she was alone. She felt sick, she thought she was going to faint and all she wanted was Eddie.

The doctor booked her the soonest appointment at the hospital, gave her a prescription for two different anti-sickness meds so they wouldn't have a repeat of last time with Lilah. And she was taken off the pill immediately. Now (Y/n) didn't know what to do.

"Eddie say something. Baby please-"

"What are we gonna do?"

(Y/n) wasn't so sure Eddie was speaking to her as much as he was trying to give himself a pep talk which clearly wasn't working.

When he tore his hand out of her grip, her chest tightened and she couldn't stop the tears from flooding down her face. She moved her hands to deadlock her arms around her waist while she watched Eddie slump forward. His elbows dug uncomfortably into his knees, his hands clasped together so tightly the knuckles were almost breathing through the skin. And he meshed his lips against his hands to stop himself from screaming.

"I don't know."

"I tried I- fuck! I tried to protect you and I- I've, I've- I can't lose you." What else was he meant to do? Abstain from (Y/n) for the next ten years until there was no risk of an unplanned pregnancy happening? Eddie knew in his heart he wouldn't be able to do that but he'd give it a damn good try if he had to.

He just wanted to have his family and keep them all safe and well. Pregnancy didn't agree with (Y/n) or in the very least, giving birth didn't agree with her. Everything with Chris had been fine up until the birth, and everything with Lilah was a train wreck.

Eddie wasn't doing that again. He wasn't taking her to hospital demanding someone do something to look after her. He wasn't waking up in the middle of the night worried she wasn't okay. He wasn't seeing her cry in agony or go mad on bed rest that didn't even help her.

He wasn't going to sit back and watch her go through hours of agony and come close to losing her life at the end of it. A baby wasn't worth that. His wife was worth everything to Eddie; he'd give his life for hers.

He wasn't being a single father to their kids because he'd gone and put her at risk by getting her pregnant.

"What am I supposed to do? Eddie I don't… I don't wanna- I can't," When (Y/n) moved her palm to press against her abdomen, she whimpered. She didn't want to get rid of it. She may not look or even feel pregnant yet, but just knowing she was having a baby made her feel different.

The only way (Y/n) would agree to an abortion was if this pregnancy was going to risk her life. She wouldn't take the risk, not after everything with Lilah, and it would break every part of her soul to do it. But right now, she hadn't been told that news.

The doctor was worried, given (Y/n)'s history, which was why she needed a scan and a lot of check ups and she needed to sit down and talk with the doctor and Eddie about this.

But what if it went as smoothly as it did with Chris? What if Eddie finally got that chance to be with (Y/n) when she was pregnant and just see her body change and grow and see the baby develop healthily? What if they got through the next few months with no sickness and no complications and (Y/n) felt fine and active and healthy and happy?

That was a possibility.

"You think I want that?" Eddie's broken tone made (Y/n) cry harder.

She hated the look in his eyes when he snapped his head to the right to look at her. Did she honestly believe Eddie wanted an abortion? Did she think he thought that was the best course of action and that he had no quarrels doing that?

He wasn't brought up that way. Eddie was a catholic, the only kind of termination his family were accepting of was the kind where the mother's life was in danger. But it wasn't just the religious side that got to him. He was brought up on the knowledge that family was everything. Eddie loved his family, he loved the family he created with (Y/n). He absolutely adored their kids and would do anything for them.

He didn't want to lose one, and Eddie could feel the guilt creeping up his throat thinking that getting rid of his own child was better than the risk of keeping them.

"You spent nearly eight months between the hospital and the bed last time, do you wanna do that again? Baby I'm not gonna sit there and watch them dose you on adrenaline because you almost died!"

"Then what do we do? Just say no a-and terminate?" (Y/n) leaned back into the cushions and dragged her hands through her hair. "We tried, but clearly you've got strong swimmers because I'm already pregnant. I can't- I can't just take it back or rewind time. I don't want to put you through that again and I don't wanna be laid up in bed or call you thinking I'm losing our baby."

Tears streamed freely down her face and she held Eddie's hardened gaze when his eyes locked with hers and his jaw clenched so tightly it looked like his teeth would start to disintegrate.

"But it might not be like that… I was so sick with Lilah from the start, if, if I'm fifteen weeks already, I feel fine. And maybe I can have a choice this time, about a C-section."

(Y/n) found out she was pregnant with Lilah from the two-month mark and she had been sick since the beginning. But if she was already over three months, she didn't feel it. (Y/n) didn't feel queasy or run down or like she was going to collapse or throw everything up. She had been a little nauseous at times, but nothing as drastic as last time.

Surely that was a good sign that this pregnancy might go better, like with Chris? Surely they had a chance of a smooth ride this time?

And with (Y/n)'s history, she might have the choice of a C-section. The doctors might agree that her bad birth with Chris and her life-threatening situation with Lilah called for precautions. A C-section would save panic, hassle and take away most of the risks (Y/n) faced.

(Y/n) pressed her hands down into the sofa and looked across at Eddie. He hadn't moved. If it weren't for the harsh sounds of his breathing fanning into his hands, (Y/n) would have thought he had frozen in time. He was as still as a mountain, except for the throbbing vein in his neck.

With her breath held deep in her lungs, (Y/n) pushed herself up and inched to the left until her knee brushed his. When he didn't move, react or pull away, (Y/n) tenderly curled both her arms around Eddie's bicep and leaned over until his arm was pinned against her chest. She pressed her lips down into his shoulder and closed her eyes, breathing in his scent as she waited for him to say something.

"We take it slow, one day at a time."

Her eyes opened and she tilted her head so her chin was pressing down into his shoulder, allowing her to look up at him. He turned his head in her direction but the emotions pooling in his eyes made (Y/n)'s heartbeat quicken.

"What?"

"If you're okay now, you might not be so ill… but if you get sick or half as bad as last time, we have to do something." Eddie knew they had very little choices right now. And he could understand (Y/n)'s point of view, she didn't want to get rid of this baby if they had a chance of having a good pregnancy, especially if she was a little bit further along already and she was okay.

But if something went wrong, if she got severely dehydrated or she got sick or had any complications, Eddie wasn't willing to take the risks. He would rather keep (Y/n) safe and think of her first. If she got ill and couldn't have the baby, Eddie could live with that. As long as she was okay.

"And we push for a C-section, you can't go through another labour like that again. You're my priority, you understand that? There is no question, you're health matters more. I need you- the kids need you-"

"I know, I know baby."

(Y/n) pressed her lips down against the junction between Eddie's neck and shoulder where she could feel his breaths begin to even out. She wasn't expecting him to be happy about this, not yet. Not until they knew how things would go and if they could do this. But she was happy he wasn't outright refusing to give this a try. That was all she could ask for.

And she was in full agreement. They could try, and if this pregnancy went south and they couldn't get through it, then that was okay. (Y/n) couldn't risk her health. She had seen how bad it could get when she had Lilah and by the time she got a placental abruption, there was nothing they could do. They couldn't terminate or speed up the pregnancy or do anything to reverse the damage or make (Y/n) better.

She had to think about Chris and Lilah, it wasn't worth risking her health when she had two children to think about who needed her.

"Will you come to the scan with me, at the hospital?" (Y/n) could barely hear her voice when she spoke against his neck. And she let go of his arm to loop her arms around his neck when he curved his arm around her waist.

He turned to the side so he was facing her and in one swift movement, he pulled (Y/n) so she was sat on his lap rather than beside him. He locked his arms around her waist, keeping her pinned against him.

"You know I will, you're not doing any of this alone, mi amor."

Eddie closed his eyes and tipped his head forward until their temples were touching. He nudged his nose against hers and tried to take deep, calming breaths. He wanted to be happy. He wanted to smile and laugh and cry and bask in the thought of having another baby like he did the last two times. And if this went well, he would have another baby in his arms.

But he couldn't get ahead of himself. He couldn't let his thoughts get carried away and get attached in case something went wrong or they had to make a decision.

His chest tightened and his shoulders tensed when he suddenly felt (Y/n)'s hand reach around to take hold of his left wrist that was resting on her back. He stayed still and waited to see what she was doing, but every part of his body started to shake beneath her when she carefully laid his palm down over her stomach.

His hand started to tremble and he dared to swipe his thumb up and down for a few seconds before he stopped himself.

Tears were already drenching his face.

He wanted to pull his hand away. He wanted to shake his head and say no. He couldn't think like that, he couldn't get ahead of himself. He couldn't imagine anything and get his hopes up. But it felt like it was already too late. (Y/n) was already pregnant, things were already complicated and now there was an image in his head of a new addition to their family. He could almost feel the way (Y/n)'s stomach was going to curve and change; something he absolutely loved but never thought he'd see again.

(Y/n) tightened her arms around his neck when Eddie suddenly leaned around her so he could smother his face in her chest. She could feel his tears soaking into her shirt and she kissed his hair when he pressed his hand down firmer on her stomach like he was waiting for confirmation or even a kick.

She was so lost in the feeling of Eddie's fingers tracing and scrunching up her shirt over her abdomen that (Y/n) almost missed the words he whispered into her chest. "It'll be okay, baby."

She wasn't quite sure who he was talking to.

***

"So, is everything okay?"

(Y/n) wanted to smile. She wanted to look up at Eddie and ask him where his patience of a saint had disappeared to. But she couldn't look away from the midwife, because it was the same question swirling around her head too.

Was everything okay with the baby? What were they going to do if the answer was no? How was Eddie going to react?

"Yes, baby looks to be a healthy size, placenta is in place, blood flow is good. And heartbeat is strong," As she spoke, the midwife tilted the screen in their direction and turned on the volume so they could listen.

Part of (Y/n) had been expecting a different answer. She was expecting to be told something was amiss or maybe she wasn't actually pregnant. Or something had gone wrong because she had been on the pill and didn't know about this sooner.

Seeing that familiar image on the screen and watching the tiny heart thud out a strong rhythm made (Y/n)'s own heart go haywire.

She could feel adrenaline pooling in her stomach and sparking through her veins when Eddie suddenly took her hand. He laced their fingers together and squeezed so tightly (Y/n) couldn't feel her fingertips anymore. But when she dared to drag her gaze away from the screen to look up at him, she was surprised.

He was smiling.

(Y/n) hadn't been expecting to see him smile. She was well prepared for his worried eyes, his jaw locked in place and his lips pressed into a thin line. She had been waiting for him to say something else, ask if something was bound to go wrong.

She was even expecting him to stay silent and not react at all. To see him stood there smiling, with tears bubbling up in his eyes, made (Y/n)'s throat tighten up with the urge to cry.

She moved their entwined hands to hold his hand against her chest, and she could see stars dancing across her vision when Eddie leaned over her. He dragged his free hand through her hair, tangling his fingers into her locks while he tenderly pressed his lips against her temple.

"You alright?"

Eddie dragged his hand across his face and looked across the kitchen at Evan. He managed a smile as Evan reached into the fridge and handed him a beer before he leaned forward on the counter.

"Are you sure, you seem a little, distant." Evan didn't want to pry, but he could see there was something playing on Eddie's mind. The distant look in his eyes wasn't something Evan was used to and Eddie had barely said a word since he walked through the door. And it had been Eddie's idea to come over and hang out while (Y/n) had taken the kids out to the park.

"Just thinking… about this." He took a large swig of his drink while he rummaged around in his back pocket for the small square photo he'd been carrying around for the last three days. It felt like gold dust between Eddie's fingers as he slid the small black and white photo across the counter towards Evan.

His eyes focused intently on his friend, gaging his reaction because he was the first person Eddie had shown this to. He was the first person Eddie wanted to talk to because Evan knew how he would feel and react to this.

"I- oh, this… this is, (Y/n)'s pregnant?"

He watched the way Evan's face changed from a reminiscent smile to a gaping expression with wide eyes and a set jaw. This wasn't an old photo Eddie had dug out the memory box. This wasn't a scan photo from Chris or Lilah's pregnancy. This was recent; this was new. (Y/n) was pregnant; again.

"I thought you said you weren't gonna have any more?" It didn't settle right with Evan that Eddie would suddenly change his mind and be all for this.

Not after how he had reacted when Lilah was born. Everyone on the team could see how Eddie was conflicted; how something so innocent and sweet and heart-wrenching as Lilah could make Eddie feel so strange. Because he was so concerned with looking after (Y/n) and wanting her to be okay, and the only reason she had been suffering in the first place was this little girl who Eddie swore to protect with his life.

It didn't seem realistic that Eddie would do a complete turn around and be willing to have another baby.

Evan remembered them talking a while back, Eddie was adamant he wasn't having any more kids. In his mind, it was as if Eddie himself was placing that risk onto (Y/n)'s shoulders if she got pregnant and he didn't want to do that. He wanted to keep her safe at all costs.

"This wasn't exactly planned, Buck. She's sixteen weeks gone already." A groan tumbled past Eddie's lips and he pushed up off the counter and moved to drag his fingers through his hair.

It felt like there were two different battles raging inside his head and his heart. His heart wanted to go through with this, but his head wasn't so swayed on the idea. His head told him there was still a lot of risks here, they weren't safe or lucky just because so far, nothing had gone wrong. And Eddie didn't want those risks. He wanted none of it.

"What are you gonna do? Eddie… I saw you when (Y/n) was in the hospital, and I've never seen you like that."

"Because I saw my wife almost die because of me."

"Why was that because of you?"

Evan couldn't see that as a fair judgement. Eddie hadn't done anything to put (Y/n) at risk of make her ill. He wasn't the reason her heart almost gave out, he wasn't the reason she got sick in the first place or why she had a placental abruption. He didn't do anything wrong, but he was holding the guilt like it was the only truth he knew.

"I got her pregnant."

"Eddie… that's not how the world works. That bloodloss and those problems (Y/n) had, they weren't a direct cause from you, you can't make that connection and blame yourself. If I drove you somewhere, and someone crashed into us, that wouldn't be my fault… you're consuming guilt you think you deserve, but you don't."

Nothing that happened or went wrong with (Y/n) was directly Eddie's fault. If he could foresee what would go wrong and still went ahead with the pregnancy then maybe he would be at fault. But he couldn't be blamed for everything that happened after (Y/n) got pregnant.

"I just- I don't wanna do that again Buck. I don't wanna sit there and think, is this how it ends? What am I gonna do with Chris and Lilah without her? I can't raise two- or God forbid three kids on my own."

"But you don't know if anything will go wrong. You're acting like it's all agreed but it's not… is this what you want, take away all the risks, what do you think?"

Eddie couldn't go through life weighing the risks to every decision he made and everything that happened. He was never going to live his life if he was going to panic about everything that he did, especially involving his family.

And there was nothing to say that (Y/n) was indefinitely going to be sick or have a complication or come close to losing her life again this time. Eddie was just presuming the future and how he thought it was going to play out. But if he took away all of those preconceptions and thought about this differently, what did he truly think?

If there was no risk, no panic, no uncertainty. Eddie didn't have to think about that. He could hear his heart clearly when all the worries were locked away and put on mute.

If he had no risks to think about, no worries about (Y/n)'s health or her life and he knew she would be okay, then Eddie had no issues knowing what he wanted. This is what he wanted. If things went differently with Lilah's birth Eddie wouldn't be stood here panicking, he would be stood here the happiest man in the world. Telling his friend he was going to have another kid.

"I think I want this baby."

[fawnchives]

i just found your blog and i LOVE IT!

oh my gosh i’m gonna squeal ?? thank you so much muffin ☺️

[wriothesleysgf]

lilah's wriothesley update for the like. zero people that asked :3

[c0 r1 10-10-10 for reference]

[ilykaveh]

yuji itadori sees a prostitute in public and then salutes and thanks them for their service

[chunkypossum]

Happy ERIS WEEK !!

New AZRIS dropping today!

Under the Weeping Beech

Two parts - 22k words

Disclaimer: DEAD DOVE(read the tags, heed the warnings); Major Character Deaths, NO COMFORT X DO NOT READ THIS FIC X honestly don't... I only wrote it because the demons said that I had to. That said thank you @pippsmcgee for being the bravest solider and helping me make sure this one made sense and cleaning it up! You're the best! I owe you so many cookies.

"His grief was a coat of thorns, the roses all torn away by time and cruel hands. All of the pain, none of the beauty."

Art note * This fic is a tragedy. No one screams tragedy with their whole chest like the ancient Greeks. So my rendition of them for this art was a bit more classic and mature than I have seen most artists go for in the past. Also, I’m almost 40 so I was craving something older.

Day 1: of @erisweekofficial- Bonds and Bargains

Read on Ao3

Summary:

*So I didn't actually mean for it to but this turned out to be pretty anti- Mor so if that's not your thing... move along. Pro Eris though it does NOT seem like it.

Deep down, Azriel knew that in some strange way, he and Eris were connected by more than their teenage affair, and they would never be able to fully let the other go. Though, he couldn’t understand it and couldn’t hope that he would be able to recover the truth before the fog ate it away completely.

Or.

"Mor's power is truth." What does that mean? It's a question you might regret asking.

I have some suggested songs for certain parts linked in the fic itself BUT If you decide to read this (which I don't actually recommend) I assume you're in it for the pain. So to kick it up a notch why not play the companion playlist in the background:

The knives felt appropriate thank you @@tsunami-of-tears for providing the dividers!

Holla at ya boi if you want on or off the Azris tag train :

@talibunny30 @iftheshoef1tz @born-to-riot @fell-in-luvs @fieldofdaisiies @aktrain @honeysuckle-daydreams13 @secret-third-thing @acourtofladydeath @pippsmcgee @youvereachedthenearest-lovergirl @baileybird71 @skyesayshi @yanny-77 @areyoudreaminof @unanswered-stars @futurehunt @ninthcircleofprythian @matrixsss @going-through-shit @c-starstuff-man0 @jules-writes-stories @the-darkestminds @krowiathemythologynerd @cauldronblssd @hieragalbatorixdottir @yourlazykitkat @hellolordling @climbthemountain2020 @lilah-asteria  @shadowsandlint @acourtofbatboydreams @theeternalstruggle @christeareads @molcat07 @mistandmemories @neciebee @dusk-muse @brunetterebel010

[lyssasdrafts]

— AFTERGLOW (azriel x reader)

017: “ tell me that it’s not my fault. ”

masterlist previous next

— NOTES

everyone talks about rhysand in a suit but imagine azriel dressing up nice 👀👀

unfortunate mentions of b*ron 🤢 this chapter, reader knew about him from growing up with lucien

eris always planned on taking over the family business from his dad after he retired, which may seem to be soon…

— TAGLIST

@ithan-holstroms-girl @strangelycami @fell-in-luvs @goldenmagnolias @glam-targaryen @acourtofdreamsandshadows @bloombb @mp-littlebit @gamarancianne @stqrgirlies-blog @peachcontour-blog @azriels-shadowsinger @awkward-d3rs3-dr3amer @chessebookgirl @fairywriter-oracle @thelov3lybookworm @corvusmorte @evergreenlark @marina468 @405rry @azrielsmate3 @that-one-little-soybean @emryb @lilah-asteria

[bratzforchris]

bed chem-m. sturniolo

SUMMARY: in which matt is looking a little too hot in his new tiktok

PAIRING: n/a

WARNINGS: masturbation (f)

WORD COUNT: 654

A NOTE FROM LILAH: i love sabrina carpenter so much that's actually my wife if you were wondering

⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚ ⋅Manifest that you're oversized I digress, got me scrollin' like Out of breath, got me goin' like

You laid in your bed, scrolling through Matt's TikTok account yet again. Did you have better things you could be doing on a Saturday night? Probably. But that didn't motivate you to get up and move. Instead, you continued to watch each and every video, biting your lip shyly when you noticed a video in which Matt's bulge was clearly visible in his baggy jeans. The more you scrolled, the heavier your breaths became, the knot in your lower stomach slowly tightening as your eyes trailed from Matt's happy trail to the waistband of his jeans and beyond.

⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚ ⋅ Who's the cute boy with the white jacket and the thick accent? Ooh (Ah) Maybe it's all in my head

Just as you were about to close the app out for the night, a notification appeared at the top of your screen. @mattsturniolo just posted a new video it read. You smiled to yourself, immedaitely clicking on the notification and navigating to the video. The TikTok showed Matt in a white jacket and baggy jeans, lip syncing along to a song you didn't know, by an artist with a British accent. All it took was one play of the video, and your breaths were increasing in speed again. He looked good. He always looked good, but today was different. Maybe it was the song, or the jacket, or the tousled hair, but whatever it was, it had you slowly trailing your pink, manicured fingers underneath the waistband of your pajama shorts and the elastic of your underwear. No one was home right now, so you were free to let your imagination wander...wherever it would take you.

⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚ ⋅ But I bеt we'd have really good bеd chem How you pick me up, pull 'em down, turn me 'round Oh, it just makes sense How you talk so sweet when you're doin' bad things That's bed (Bed) chem (Chem) How you're lookin' at me, yeah, I know what that means And I'm obsessed

Your fingers slowly began to trace circles on your already swollen clit, the thought of you and Matt tangled in silky sheets together playing in your mind like a movie. You could imagine the way he would pick you up, throwing you over his shoulder as he carried you to bed. He'd practically tear your lacy thong off, throwing it somewhere on your bedroom floor. Maybe he'd even turn you so that you were facing a mirror; the more you thought, the faster your fingers pulsated against your clit, your folds already slick from the mere thought of Matt. You could practically hear him whispering the dirtiest, most depraced things in your ear as he took you from behind, forcing you to watch yourself get absolutely railed in the mirror. You thought about the way you'd be able to see him smirking, those oh-so-blue eyes that you had fallen in love with when you'd first started watching the triplets would be alight with the mischief of making you accommodate his cock. In short, you were absolutely obsessed with the idea of Matt fucking you, and the way you began to pump your fingers in and out of your dripping pussy was physical proof of that.

⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚ ⋅Come right on me, I mean camaraderie Said you're not in my time zone, but you wanna be Where art thou? Why not uponeth me? See it in my mind, let's fulfill the prophecy

Your mind flipped scenarios as you began to grind your hips against your bed, fingers working overtime on your clit and pussy. Matt was on top of you now, thrusting into you roughly. He'd have his head buried in your neck as he pulled out quickly, thick, white spurts of cum covering your stomach as he whimpered in your ear. You knew it was stupid, but you didn't care. Rationally, you would always be just a fan to Matt. Hell, you didn't even live anywhere close to even having a remote chance of meeting him. Part of you even wondered if he would want you in the way that you wanted him. You were pulled back into reality by the ache in your lower tummy that was begging you to stop edging yourself. You once again thought about Matt on top of you, his tattooed arm holding you down as he pumped into you, desperately chasing both your and his orgasm. You could see it in your mind so clearly, making you wish Matt was here to fulfill your wildest fantasies.

⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚ ⋅ Ooh (Ah) Who's the cute guy with the wide, blue eyes and the big bad mm? Like

Your legs violently shook as you fingered yourself, your clit throbbing wih each thought of Matt you had. Maybe he'd even finger you himself, the cool metal of his rings being a drastic contrast to his warm hands as they pumped in and out of you, encouraging you to take the punishment with faux "tough guy" façade. Those bright blue eyes would crinkle as he watched you squirm underneath him. That was the thought that sent you over the edge. You finally released, covering your fingers in your cum. You knew that all Matt would ever be to you was a fantasy, but for now, you enjoyed the feeling of thinking about the chemistry in bed between the two of you.

tags ♡: @blahbel668 @mattsturnswhore @sofieeeeex @jetaimevous @pkfferoo @idekman1231 @svphscc @littlestar44 @https-roman @flow3rsturns13 @supercoolgirl69 @hearts4chriss @urprobablyscuffed @pepsiluvr0209 @vsigishishis @addiestarx @sturn1ololuvr @sturnclouds @memea32221 @hoes4matthew @whoreformatthewsturniolo @facingreailitysgravity @sturnsmia @sturnobsessedwh0re @sturniolos-f4n

note ♡: if you'd like to be added to my taglist, click here <3