#like. she died so suddenly and with the whole inheritance and oops my uncle is an evil bastard actually fiasco
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just saw a recipe video for a cake that looks just like a cake my late grandma used to make and now I got tears streaming down my face oops
#like. she died so suddenly and with the whole inheritance and oops my uncle is an evil bastard actually fiasco#and my parents never having the time to visit more than twice a year i never got to ask her for her recipes#ever since her death i thought i'd never get to taste or see that cake again#BUT HERE IT IS RIGHT BEFORE MY EYES. WITH A RECIPE DETAILING HOW TO DO IT. WHAT#i think i never really worked through her passing away. i'm still crying...#screw difficult family dynamics and situations that made it almost impossible to bond with relatives fr#all i have is that idealised image of her during the holidays. cooking up a storm in the kitchen#making delicious food. organising the easter egg hunt around the garden for us kids#decorating the christmas tree and preparing little treat platters with chocolate and clementines for us kids...#man i miss her.... wish i could've spent more time with her... talked about knitting and sewing and cooking#and growing plants and veggies. she used to have a greenhouse in the back garden. her tomatoes were the best#all the different shades of red orange and yellow. some even green!#i can almost taste them...#damn... i miss her so much... i also miss my early childhood. when it was just me and my cousin and her and grandpa#when they'd babysit us over the weekend. the walk to the little village bakery down the main road. the handmade sweet raisin bread...#the chocolates my grandma used to have around the house with the adorable kittens on the box...#really missing my grandma tonight...
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