#like. bish no. i need to put sustenance in my body. now
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#i rly need someone to tell me its ok not to meet my nutritional goals for the day and just put some food any food in my body#bc i know that deep down#but my mf autistic brain is like 'but!!! u didnt meet all ur dietary requirements!! so u need to fix that asap!!#except all that food is gross rn! so u shall suffer and starve instead!!'#like. bish no. i need to put sustenance in my body. now#and yet. i cannot make myself#why do i always need like. Permission to do that (ik why. The Disorders™.)#ughshsjsksk#@ my brain: LET ME EAT !! SOMETHING ANYTHING !! B4 MY BLOOD SUGAR DROPS TOO LOW AND I HAVE A MEDICAL EMERGENCY#fml#i just. get weird guilt when i eat something that ik isnt ideal for my health and dietary needs#which is dumb bc any food is better than no food#i know this. i know it. and yeT#aghdgshsj#save me#ask to tag#disordered eating#not totally but its part of the reason so im gonna tag it to be safe
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