#like you can have takes but Liam had Vax die for Vex he is clearly invested

[hayleysayshay]

It is normal, typical storytelling for a character to have a ‘true love’ and that someone be the most important person to someone in the present, someone being more important to someone doesn’t mean they don’t care about anyone else. A cast member recognising the tragedy of Keyleth, who’s special person who would keep her less alone died, doesn’t mean they dislike other relationships.

Vex and Vax’s journey was then growing apart from each other. They found other people outside their codependent relationship. It doesn’t mean they stopped caring about each other at the end.

[soleminisanction]

i think you bring up really interesting points about vax that i'd never considered before, it's great to have someone like you who doesn't hesitate in saying "hey maybe this isn't so good a behavior" w/ a character that is so popular. i like him a lot personally but i did just reach the raishan ep and i felt a bit... annoyed by the fact that he didn't wait a single second to act, which is typical but not cool. anyway, i wanted to ask, don't you think vax's deal w/ the raven queen also comes(1/2)

down to a reaction in the face of a difficult situation and like you said, nothing intentional on liam's part or in vax's characterization? i mean, as you said there's definitely an overprotectiveness that can be seen as stripping vex of her agency and what she could have done for herself in that situation, but isn't there also the factor that obviously vax would rather die or put himself in jeopardy rather than having either of those things happen to vex? (2/2)

Oh nonnie, I could kiss you. Thank you for being polite and rational. 

You are absolutely right: it’s not intentional. Endemic sexism very rarely is, and there is absolutely some leeway that needs to be given to the fact that this is an improv show done on the fly. 

But honestly, it not the moment of Vex’s ritual that’s the problem. It’s not even the act of sacrificing or being willing to sacrifice himself for his sister. That all was fine. It could have even been touching and compelling....if not for the aftermath.

In the subplot that followed the moment in the Tomb, Vax consistently frames his relationship to the Raven Queen in the terms of, “If I do not serve the Queen, she will take back my sister’s soul.” Even his playlist (put together months later) frames things in these terms: “Sister’s life dependent on an unintended bargain...”

And that’s where the sexism comes in. Threatening a female character to control her male associate is an inherently objectifying narrative, predicated on the idea that the woman is an object that can be taken from the man. The moment she becomes his motivation, she stops being a person. That’s true whether it’s his sister, his daughter, his mother, or his love interest. 

Now, here’s thing that’s really difficult to parse: this entire narrative is bullshit.

What Vax claims to be the Raven Queen’s terms are not the Raven Queen’s terms. They’ve never been the Raven Queen’s terms. That’s not even how the variant Resurrection ritual works. The only person in the entire game who has ever said anything about Queenie threatening Vex to keep him in line is Vax’ildan himself.

Vex being ‘held hostage’ is not a legitimate part of the narrative of Critical Role. For that to be true, Matt-as-the-Raven-Queen would have to be playing along and he’s not. As far as Vax’ildan’s canon reality is concerned, this entire inherently sexist mess is all in his head.

And that’s the actual crux of the problem: pushing this narrative indicates that Vax -- however subconsciously -- views Vex as something that can be taken away from him specifically. As an object. And it’s not even the only indicator of that: there’s tons of moments scattered throughout the series, from the way he talks to and about her to the way he treats Percy as her love interest, that all indicate that this is a pervasive mindset.

Hell, his Clasp backstory is basically more of this exact same bullshit except that’s a sexist subplot that’s completely canon and Matt’s not off the hook for that either, everyone makes mistakes. 

And the biggest thing of all is that Liam clearly has no idea that he’s communicating any of this. He’s just using the tropes that he’s grown up with, tropes that are saturated with this pervasive mindset because it’s endemic to our society and to our media and Liam -- as a middle-aged white male living in Los Angeles -- has never had reason or cause to question it.

So...yeah, that’s the long and short of it. It’s not that one moment that’s the problem, it’s everything that’s come after and a fair bit of what came before.