#like whatever dont respect me but at least respect urself lol
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grumbles
#tl posts#blahblah blah this is bc i wanna ramble but dont necessarily wanna make anyone see it unless they actively choose lol#me being grumpy and irritated abt dni breaking again lol#blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah. blah blahblah blah blah blah blahblahblah#blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah. blah#this is rlly sysc-ourse bc im not debating it and in theory if ur anti endo ur not following me anyway lol#but man. anti en-dos will be like pro/neutral en-do DNI!!!!! and then interact with those people#im just so tired of it man it makes us not wanna make boards or art anymore#bc im tired of no matter how big and flashy we make it#they break THEIR OWN DNI by interacting with US like have some respect for YOUR OWN BOUNDARIES AT LEAST!!!!!!!!#sorry 2 be so crangy lately just tired of boundaries irl being stomped and then coming on here#and having the same thing happen#like whatever dont respect me but at least respect urself lol#just tired man
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Imagine a horribly clumsy creator in the sagau... like trips over their own feet, starts coughing due to choking on air randomly, knocking a vase off a table that was in the middle of the table somehow???? Silly goofy stuff like that (I pull these silly goofs often personally)
(obv goes w/o saying sorry for being so late to reply /gen) ;-;
clumsy reader is so me core idk why i didnt think of this lmao
(this gif is liek the modern equivalent of Charlotte posting ur embarrassing clumsy moments on insta Steambird acc lmao)
(so sometimes im lazy and dont include the ask stuff esp if its shorter like this, so here's at least the characters in this one: Fontaine ppl <3 along with a G for general audience, barring cuss words)
Navia would politely ask you to go the edge or whatever area ur in whenever she pulls out her cannons/guns LMAO
every time you and either Clorinde or Neuvillette are walking next to you, or doing rlly anything, its like night and day
ur out here finding all the cracks in the sidewalk, bumping everything that could even possibly have a liquid in it, and have constant bruises from hip checking/stubbing toes on mechas walking around
Clorinde is impressed at that point bc mechas are actively programmed to get out of your way, so how u managed to put them back into ur way rlly fascinates her 😭😭
Neuvillette would like to wrap u in fabric/bubble wrap equivalent for his old ass, in an attempt to desperately stop u from hurting urself lol
u get a new coat or new pants from him all the time, u just thought at first he was rlly into giving u Fontaine fashion until Furina pointed out that it was spring/summer and you wouldn't wear thick woolen pants and fur-lined coats everyday 💀
(poor dragon guy doesn't rlly get the practical side of clothes, he likes fashion, but he inadvertently subscribes to the "hoes don't get cold" philosophy by being an ancient dragon lord)
Wriothesley is unfortunately nice enough to constantly try and catch his poor god, which ends well for neither of you 50% of the time
its not even ur weight takes him down, he's buff as hell after all, and he's dealt with rowdy inmates, its just.. ur clumsiness spreads.
if ur tripping, and the poor Duke reaches out to catch you, ur reaching out at the same time to steady urself on a side table w/a vase full of water, which u then knock off, drenching ur back and his face at the same time LMAO
he doesn't learn, despite u literally begging him to stop trying to help u, then u try and compromise to just let u fall and help u afterward asdfghkl-
Wrio's too chivalrous tho, the most u can get him to do is always grab ur arm instead of trying to bodily catch you
if u think after the first like, ✌️ TWO times Lynette is willing to help you, u r so wrong lmao
she's seen her brothers clumsiness, she knows theres no saving u
she does comfort u after slipping (not even falling but just flailing dramatically) for the 5th time in the puddles around water fountains tho
Lyney and Freminet are lowkey legit convinced someones cursed their god atp 😰
Freminet always had bandaids for u, and Lyney keeps a supply of ur fav candy to cheer u up after embarrassing urself by falling ass backwards right into the Fountain of Lucine right in front of Opera house lmao
...
...Charlotte thinks this is all vv hilarious, no she has no respect for ur godliness, her archon was Furina like LMAO- IM SORRYYY
(she has started a small section in the steambird of a near daily- DAILY picture of u being clumsy 😭)
(u, not srsly, threaten to smite her and she just giggles)
(its ok they take it all in a cute/endearing trait type of way)
☆
again, sorry for lateness, when i reopen askbox (soon, FINALLY-)
ill try and stay more on top of it and try and sort whatre just chats/non-requests better too 😭😭
hope u guys are having a good week!! tysm for being patient and nice to me :')
Safe Travels Kai,
💀♒
If you wanna join a taglist, DM me what for! "Pspspsss, please tag me for [All SAGAU posts, Only SAGAU Language AUs, diff fandom, etc.]!"
(If you ever wanna drop, just DM me! "No more taglists/[specifically this AU/fandom] please!")
♡the beloveds♡
@karmawonders / @0rah-s / @randomnatics / @glxssynarvi / @nexylaza / @genshin-impacts-me / @wholesomey-artist / @thedevioussmirk / @the-dumber-scaramouche / @chocogi / @fallen-starr / @areaderofbooks / @devilangel657 / @esthelily / @justinsomniachild / @nanithefuck / @questionotmystopit / @chinuneko / @silvers-tongue
@kiyomi-uchiha777
<3
#genshin sagau#sagau#genshin isekai#my asks#aqua asks#genshin impact sagau#genshin x reader#genshin imagines#gender neutral reader#oh tags#my beloathed#idk anymore to put pls just take this#anyway u think sigwienne would do that blunt child thing where they kinda read you to filth#bc i do#i rlly do#and i think this is one teyvat god reader that would not handle it well 😭
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lol tw rant: feeling absolutely insane rn. it just feels like the universe is absolutely against me in the oh so insignificant but absolutely top of my mind/main priority of having a romantic relationship. like i’ve gone all of my life without a boyfriend, am i really that undeserving of romantic love?? like i kill myself to be a good potential girlfriend, yet i’m alone. like what the actual fuck. it seems like everyone who wants someone has someone and ppl that are alone choose to be alone. like i’m so over feeling sorry for myself and im so f*cking over begging for this. why should i beg for something? it’s not like i don’t try because i do. i literally put myself out there. i’ve literally been on dating apps, i’ve gone on dates, i go out and do things on my own. i try not to have resting bitch face but no no nooooooooo. it’s just not for me. like am i being f*cking punished? i’m always there listening to my friends about their romantic lives and i’m happy for them, i support them, but after years of hearing everyone talk ab their romantic lives, no matter how fucking shitty their love life is, u just feel awful about urself. (bc at least someone actually likes them enough for them to have a romantic life) like i know i’m beautiful, smart and accomplished, but i just get to this point in which it seems like nothing about me matters (and ik how bad that sounds but it’s my truth) like sometimes i feel like pulling a full cassie howard and just fully surrendering myself to any man that gives me attention. but i know how incredibly bad that is in every aspect of the notion, but that doesn’t mean that every day that i’m still single, that i’m not becoming more and more like szn 2 cassie. and to make matters even worse, everyone’s f*cking surprised when i tell them i’m single and i’ve always been. like they always think i’m lying. and i’m flattered but then i’m ALWAYS sad afterwards. it feels like i’m on the outside of the biggest joke ever. i’ve literally had a random man walk up to me in the street and tell me “your boyfriend is lucky to have you” like thank you, but I DONT HAVE A BOYFRIEND. like why is god punishing me? why is the universe punishing me?? and i’m over all that, “you need to love urself first” bullshit, because i do. i’m basically a straight up narcissist at this point because of how much love i’ve had to pour into myself. yes, i have friends, i have family, i have a promising job, i’m genuinely happy with the rest of my life. my cups are filled up. except this one. it’s literally empty. i just can’t believe how much this literally affects me. it pisses me off that it bothers me so much. like god give me a fucking break. i literally have the most basic standards. respectful, attractive to me, funny, tall, a talker and not ridiculously older than me. like girlllllllllll i am NOT asking for the world. i’m gonna get a tattoo on my forehead that says “LOOKING FOR BF” anyways… i think i feel better. but it doesn’t matter if i feel better now, bc it’s a bandaid on a fucking bullet hole. i’ve dealt with this for years. and i know it goes beyond just being loved, it’s daddy issues, its abandonment issues, it’s fear of vulnerability, it’s feeling unworthy of being loved, it’s so many things. and i’m just so OVER IT. like whatever.
well, :) kisses 💋
pray for me!!! i need it 😀😘
#insane#girlblogging#whisper girl#sadgirl#i'm sad#relationship#messy girl#coquette#black swan#lana del rey#cassie howard#euphoria
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Ok ok last question then I’ll stop bothering you lol (but I eagerly look forward to anything you will say in the future about fairytail!)
I think I got your thoughts on Nalu, but what about other ships? You said Gajeel and Levy are your fav ship, could you tell us more why? What about Gray x Juvia? Do you have a least favorite ship?
(And don’t be sorry for rambling a lot/your posts being long! I really enjoy reading your thoughts!)
bestie i literally love u i never have the chance to post my ft hc stuff im THRIVING
aight so im going to make enemies with this post i can feel it in my bones gjkfdhgsfdkj
however i just want to say if u like these ships thats completely fine and if you read them diffrently than i do thats also dope
so lets start positive!! i LOVE gajevy sm its so perfect i just ljdghfkjd
no listen like the thing that gets me abt gajevy is how it elevates gajeel as a character SO MUCH and gives levy so much agency at the same time, like u cant tell me ft would have embraced gajeel the way they did if levy didnt CHOOSE to forgive gajeel in some capacity and like fuck imagine ur GAJEEL in this situation like bro wakes up everyday and this is just his life
gajeel lost metalica at a young age, and (i dont remember too much of canon but im pretty sure its implied he just kinda fucked around until phantom tropue picked him up which yikes) like this CHILD was on his own most of his formative years and then got picked up by a super shitty abusive group of ppl and he just LEARNED to blend in, like yea metalica made him kind of a punk but he was a KID so during those years he was alone he probably just closed himself off to survive and learned to prioritize himself over everybody else and to do that it takes a level of desensitizing urself to others pain
and like ok again im playing hard and fast with canon but i THINK its implied he like, had done a lot of bad shit with them or whatever right? like what he did to levy and fairy tail wasn't NEW, so when the events in canon happen and he ends up at fairy tail, in my mind that's the FIRST TIME he has to face how HIS ACTIONS DIRECTLY HURT SOMEONE
and not only thats but someone who OBJECTIVELY DIDN'T DESERVE IT
like ugh gajeel just,, having to learn to let himself care but also it fucking sucks bc it just makes it set in more and more what a bad person he is (he isnt but he thinks he is) THEN FUCKING LEVY PULLS UP AND JUST?? IS THE BEST???
she literally blows thro all his expectations of her bc at this point i think hes use to dealing with ppl being afraid of him bc that ssomething he understands and control, what he DOESNT understand is her being NICE to him and it makes him RESPECT her and its so out of no where that by the time the GMG roles around and gajeel has fully accepted the fact that he indeed has emotions like everyone else, ONLY TO HAVE TO FACE LEVY BEING SCARED OF HIM AGAIN
learning to put others needs above his own and being empathetic in his own fucked up way
ok enough positivity time to make ppl mad
gonna link my juvia is a lesbian post here bc it sums up a LOT of my feelings on gruvia but the tldr is that my personal hc is that juvia is a lesbian with a serious case of comp het from trying to fit in with other kids growing up and it literally was just never corrected until she got to fairy tail and actively started to form friendships
the main reason i dislike gruvia is that it paints gray as the one who needs to change in order to accept juvias feelings and not just cuz he needs to grow as a person and learn to allow himself to be vunrable.
like grays arc doesnt ONLY center around juvia but its a big part of it and juvias growth CENTERS around gray and we can talk about the the borderline misogynist idea of having a female character whos damn near whole identity is her feelings for a man where she never grows or learns meaningfully but instead just very slowly chills out more so from being sidelined than growth but i digress i just dont like them
last is jerza,, i just dont like em,, jellal is really boring in my opinion and he had a lot of potential but meh? his redemption is neat and his history with erza has potential but i feel like the point of erzas arc is about growth and moving on and while i think her and jellal can still be friends and have each others back she still has so much healing to do after tower of heaven
idk i dont see a lot wrong with jerza i just feel like its a lil bland and not my cup of tea
and yes queer platonic nalu is my life id die for them actually and i have more stuff about natsus abandonment issues and how they carry into his relationships with ppl but imma stop bc this post is long jgkfhgdjhfdjk
tldr: i love gajevy, actively dislike gruvia, very meh about jerza, love qpp nalu
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https://www.facebook.com/104057744428568/posts/156998459134496/?sfnsn=mo&d=n&vh=e
Fucking told him its a huge red flag if someone doesn't get rid of their apps. Multiple apps. Smh 😠 "oh yea i don't use them anymore" proceeds to use fb dating app" for real come on bro!
Some comments of the post:
"If you have to be checking up on your Partner then you shouldn't be with that person.. Idk how people have time for all this .. love yourself and know your worth.."
"If you're in a serious committed exclusive relationship you should not be on tinder. That's how I met my fiance and as soon as we said we are gf and bf and exclusive we both deleted it. Honestly if I was her I would have broken up with him too"
"a person also has a right to trust their gut feeling and check things out if something's not feeling right. Knowledge is power"
I've already discussed this but this news clip further validates my point of the topic, nothing more. I could call him out on hs bs further with detail, but I won't....yet, out of respect even though he probably doesn't deserve it. Til he reaches me & apologizes for everything he's done, i can say whatever tf I want & i could make a whole damn list.
Its the events of this what happened that started our downfall to begin with cuz i didn't trust him & he didn't even try to gain it back just left it as is when I could've turned my back right then & there, no apology either. Didnt apologize much actually, not even when i last saw him. But from then we spiraled & he got bored of me. I wasn't giving him what he wanted in whatever way & he wanted to find more. Closed himself off from the beginning & that created his boredom 😒
Would've had a blast together like a normal fucking couple if he was less closed off, & wouldn't have felt the need to do shit behind my back.
I'll stop talking about it for now, I have the anger & urge to keep going but I wont...actually no Screw it im pissed 😡 but ill keep it light. Its just not fair, I did so much for him but I was disrespected in different aspects of the whole relationship. Fuck! I've talked about the positives alot cuz i do love him..but the negatives are such bs too.
I want a good ass sincere apology for all of it so I can forgive him & move on, ive already apologized myself even though I dont think I should have to 😒. Didnt even give me a straight answer for the breakup, it was always a different excuse when I know he just wanted to pursue other women without me around im not fucking stupid. His own toxicity was too much even for himself & I was in the line of fire, to where i was the toxic one? No fuck that its unacceptable, he always lied when it came to covering his own ass.
For all i know he's watching me squirm & taking pleasure in all the pain I'm going through over him cuz he likes the attention. But no I actually don't think so on that one he's still good & ill give him credit where its due. But I gave him all the attention he wanted/needed & still wanted more from someone else. Really dude fucking really!?
Man up & own up to your mistakes, speak to me where I can actually hear ur voice speaking back to me with sincerity. We'll apologize together. Yea ull be pissed about this, but after u get over it & calm down. Give in & call me, granted when ur ready, & open up for once in your damn reserved life. Itll help us both with more closure & may even take a weight off our shoulders if we just talk it out, no arguing...since we're done there's no point anyway..a friendly non judgment zone cuz idc, i won't think of u any less.
U confused me during & especially after the relationship cuz i didnt know who u really were, i know the good cuz that's what u allowed me to see, ive accepted the bad that I knew already & from what ive learned...i accepted u regardless.
I always forgave u & not cuz im passive, cuz forgiveness is what the Bible teaches.. ive forgiven u & myself the best i could especially with the last things ive showed u, (accept this part cuz im pissed rn & standing up for myself, ill delete eventually maybe if u ask cuz nobody wants to be seen any less of a person. but I can make it alot worse, calling me the mistake was the worst thing u ever said to me & pointing out your faults so u can be better throughout the relationship was my only toxicity to u) we actually never really fought except the 1 time, just argued a tiny bit rarely about little things.
Ive tried using every ounce of my courage to show u how much im sorry for any wrong ive done. but its up to u now to make things right. U know me, ive always said that u can talk to me about anything. I want to be able to trust again & move on whilst staying friends. What else do u have to lose, might even have a great heart to heart convo dude to dudet
Everything ive ever said up to this point lies all my Questions. But here's most of the list, we both were equally in control of the relationship. Maybe u didn't want me to? But doing everything I had to for myself & the household, what u & ur parents wanted of me & just me being me cuz i had to, u had your own part to play & did provide...but did u actually not want me to cater to u if it were a sign u were lazy or something? Like did u not feel worthy of me? What is it u think is my "addicting personality" that isn't fixable on the surface? What is it really that u didnt like about me? This is why i don't have closure, u left me like this, confused as well as wanting more since u held back so much. Was that on purpose to give me even more false hope & want me to pine over u? Did u ever or do u still, love me at all? What did u want from me & out of the relationship, what was the purpose of it from ur perspective & why do u think i couldn't give that to u? What did i lack that u felt compelled to not tell me so I could improve & vise versa so we both could improve? Why wouldn't u allow me to help u become a better man when (I shouldnt have to btw), its exactly what u wanted but maybe didnt see it? Do u realize your own faults even as u do them? Lol. Like i genuinely want to know as much as the good ive seen, cuz to be better the more open of a person u are the more u understand yourself too.
Unless claiming u want to be a better man is part of ur alluring charm in love bombing process to land a caring girl on purpose lol...god I hope not, that would just mean u rinse & repeat like a for real narcissist 🤔 seriously tho look into that im not even kidding, im asking cuz i care. Im pissed now but 1 thing is that im trying to not put ur behavior against u cuz maybe u can't help it, its just the way u are, all ive seen & experienced points to maybe 50% of u lol. Ive always suspected narcissism, a real psych problem that might be worth looking into. But yea 1 of the reasons especially why im so forgiving & trying not to put it against u, why i still care despite u being a dick lol. I chose to look past it, all the time & up to now cuz I understand what its like to have psychological ailments. The worst part about it is most dont realize it, so i encourage u to do some research & self reflection & admitting it to urself are the 1st steps. Okay? There's different kinds & levels to being 1 too, i found that fascinating. bryan is definitely a different type, ur more lighter than that...definitely not the worst which is the physical harm type. Trust me its worth finding out more about yourself, just dont use it to ur advantage in a bad way but i trust u to do right & grow. Not sure a discarded supply (ie me) has ever tried telling a narcy what they might be for the benefit of their own self awareness 🤔,idk if its ever been done, but theres a 1st for everything? U can find alot on it in quora digest alone but Google is also ur friend.
You always were worth every effort of mine to help u in any way to be happy, & i was most happy when u were. U mean alot to me still, its the effect u had on me, I was under ur spell lol its hard to rid myself of it still, not sure when it'll pass. I chose to see it as a gift rather than a curse, that ur effect on me is still so strong when I shouldn't give a damn. If u really are a narcy, then I understand & don't put alot against u cuz its just the way u are & i need to accept it, but if it somehow helps u to help yourself cuz of it, then whats the harm? But, even in doing this or having my socials public for u...maybe just feeds into what u want...i still dont care, I want u to see how bad or good im doing without u in my life, so u know im okay at least. U promised friendship, least I can do is allow u to keep tabs on me too we spoke of, on my end of things.
The 18th of June was the last time i saw u. It'll soon be a month ago in about a week & a 1/2 & your birthday would mark 2 months. Cant believe we couldn't even last through to that 😔
Mark my words playa I will be contacting u on that day lol. Can't ghost your homie forever sweetie
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Not to be a little bitch here, but your entire blog is dedicated to communist whatever, but you also work at Wendy's? I mean, if you work for a living, sure, but also if you're just a teen living your life saying 'fuck capitalism' but also decidedly contributing to it in your own life, can it not be argued that you are, in fact, hella hypocritical, and need to take a closer look at your own morals and judgments?
YOU GUYS I FINALLY GOT ONE OF THESE, do u kno how long ive been waiting fr this ???? what a coming of age ritual, honestly … :”-)
– anyway srsly tho theres so many things wrong w/ this ask lol …. so many things n im gonna try n explain them to u as non-aggressively as possible ….
a) my entire blog isn’t dedicated to communist whatever lol … like at all, this blog was never meant to be a completely political blog, this is my main blog where i talk about my feelings & interests & hobbies n stuff …. this is not a political blog but bc im interested in political stuff, politics r quite prevalent on occasion !!!! ((n its anarcho-communism … just saying?))
b) “if you work[i.e “contribute to capitalism”] for a living, sure, but also if you’re just a teen[…]” … uh haha this assumes that my parents make enough money to completely support me, & that they have no troubles paying for all the things i need to live comfortably …. which is completely wrong? my parents cover my food bills, but i still have to work to earn enough to buy clothes, hang out w/ friends, buy housing items like decorations/plants/blankets/cleaners/dishes, etc, as well as pay off my phone + medical bills…. uh n this also assumes that to be a communist you have to scrape by & just Barely make ends meet, otherwise you’re a hypocrite … u cant be in any other state other than poverty or you’re a hypocrite ….. which is completely rediculous, to say the least lol …. living comfortably isn’t a sin that omits you from communist, mutual aid ideology … u dont have to suffer to be communist??? if ur working class its okay to be able to support urself comfortably n not suffer???? the real problem is having significant wealth or being a ceo or boss or landowner, etc??? n just saying, personally, by being a lower class teenager who works weekend shifts at wendys to afford clothes and be able to hangout w/ my friends, i dont think that’s really an issue lol???
uh, c) “but also decidedly contributing to it in your own life” ……. bih like we have a Choice whether or not contribute to capitalism? if folks dont work, they’ll die of poverty, n thats just how capitalism works … u have no other choice than to contribute otherwise u get death lol …… yall anti-communists say “just grow up & get a job” & then when we have a job to pay for life expenses yall say “you filthy HYPOCRITE” … we cant win
d) this might seem like it Conflicts my previous statements, so id like to say tht th reasons fr work under capitalism n communism r completely different …. under capitalism u work to stay afloat n to climb a ladder of Better Wages™, n under communism u work bc u wanna contribute to society, or bc it betters u, or bc its smth u enjoy doing, or etc… like, actually human-empathy related reasons rather than greed …..
anyway i also work bc i Like staying busy. i like having smth to do, i like having the company of my coworkers on the weekends …. i enjoy doing things??? which is part of how communism works … ppl do work fr reasons like that ….. so im just saying that my reasons for work are tied with my communist morals lmao …. being communist doesnt mean being anti-work, it means being against the structure with which work is organized, & by being a crew member((the lowest paid & least respected position)) @ wendys, im just saying, im a victim of the structure & not a propagator of it.
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July 11
7:34 AM, living room, Rize.
Drinking hot water with lemon
Listening to lofi hiphop radio on youtube
Alright so some updates on A, so things were going good, actually cute, u know he told me his real name and I told him half of mine lol (cuz bitch my name is unique one google search and he’ll find my profile- also I have been keeping my info on the low, but still I think he knows a good amount about me).
All until we brought up the topic of religion, specifically a popular and controversial one.
Motherfucker is still texting me. I gotta go make breakfast.
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10:00 AM, living room, Rize.
Drinking ready mix hot Mocha (it's decent)
Listening to Gorillaz
Alright so to pick up from where I left, so this fucker is one of those pissed off organized religion hating types. Now look I honestly have nothing against atheists, agnostics, or whatever u want to fucking call urself. Dude its okay with me, u do u boo (one of my mottos). But this guy is relentless like I told him look fam, I dont really know what I am, I am by name in this religion sure, I follow and practice some aspects of it, but largely I still have my issues with it that I would rather not think about, cuz its a personal touchy thing. Its fucking personal okay?
But this bitch naaaa he didnt give a fuck and keep poking at me, though I made it clear I was uncomfortable and annoyed. Its also my fault I should have asked him to let it go, but I did not say it, so he kept going. But its clear that our perspectives are very different. I just go to bed. Next morning I try to close the subject, he fucking repliesss in an instant, gurl I was shook. And then goes on to so at least ur self-aware, anyway im not going to press u any further over this. I am standing front of my screen like, FUCK U, who the fuck do u think u r? I dont owe u shit jack of an explanation. I should have reminded my self of that last night. Besides why the fuck do u care that much man? u dont even know me, why does it matter to u that much lol
I honestly think he is one of those pseudo-intellectuals, that thinks hes deep cuz hes ‘unconventional’ and ‘different from the rest’ or some edgy shit. Like H’s bitch ass boyfriend.
Either way, I know now for sure nothing will work out between us, there is also his Persian background that my parents will for sure object over. Like I personally dont give a fuck, but its really telling the way he pressed on and reacted to this issue, besides hes not looking for something serious.
And his approach to life is also telling about him, as in why he went into uni, and the major he chose. But ppl change, he has learned from his mistakes, regrets them, and it trying to fix things for better future prospects for himself- which I respect. Besides I have done so much dumb shit I still deeply regret and aim to fix.
I guess we can still be friends, that okay with me. But that means I have be more careful about what I reveal about myself. I dont really feel like replying to him anymore (he barely starts a topic, its just me leading the convo and its getting annoying- but I guess he could be gauging me), he put me off with his latest stunt...
Im starting to think that I will die alone, or have to break my oath and accept petty short flings. Like im not asking for the perfect partner, thats not realistic I understand, but the required compatibilities are so hard to fucking met, and I will have to heavily compromise. But if I do that I run the risk of not being able to bare their faults- I get that an important aspect of a successful relationship is finding someone who's quirks are bearable to u. And I feel that due to the nature of my personality, no one will be able to stand me, and then I cant stand someone for long...
I need to write to H.
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