#like today in law we were talking abt. idk court trial process or whatever and it was dull. and my mind just left for ONE SECOND I SWEAR | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

itsallavengers · 5 years ago

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its just mad like im sure theres something wrong with me. the way i go about life is just not fucking good. i will never get anywhere because like i could do SO well i could be academic i could read books and if i worked hard at something, ANYTHING, i could be successful at it but i never will! i never will. because i simply would rather scroll aimlessly through the depths of tumblr and refresh every three seconds for the instant yet fleeting gratification of a new post than spend those hours doing something productive, because that’s not instant validation baby so i dont care! thats my life. like what! what.

#its like my ROOM. i never CLEAN IT and it would take THREE SECONDS but i DONT #and. the fact that i have been saying im going to read this book for WEEKS NOW and then when i have free time i just??? i just spend it #like time just PASSES #i dont even know what time IS #and bruv. luv. like im not tooting my own horn here. i could achieve and do SO much if i was inclined to lol #but then i procrastinate every single fucking thing or i just forget about EVERYTHING or i am too fucking ANXIOUS of what people might THINK #i have. zero motivation. for anything #but then occasionally the urge to pluck every single one of my leg hairs will compel me and i will spend four hours doing that? WHY.#WHY COULDNT I JUST READ THAT BOOK IVE BEEN WANTING TO READ FOR WEEKS. WHY COULDNT I HAVE STUDIED #i hate the fact that i get by without trying bc it means that i have no idea how to work hard lmfao. just none. i dont do it #and as soon as my mind decides for a SECOND that it is bored it will just. go somewhere else.#like today in law we were talking abt. idk court trial process or whatever and it was dull. and my mind just left for ONE SECOND I SWEAR #except then half an hour had passed and i'd been daydreaming about trying to scale down a tower building with only bedsheets lmfa #its like sometimes im not even there bro...... its all or nothing bro its black or white #where is my off switch. WHERE IS It #and alternatively: WHERE IS MY ON SWITCH. PLEASE.#can u get medication for procrastination bro or shall i just drink like 20 cups of coffee a day to get my nerves Firing

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