#like there's just no one who actually chooses to be with me because they like me and i'm starting think

[l8rhader]

Once upon a time, it was easy for students to write a six-hundred-word essay in M.L.A. format, double-spaced in twelve-point Times New Roman font.  Worse than that, back in my day, it wasn’t actually word count.  It was page count.  In those instances, you’d be stuck making it up as you went until you got to the point where you thought you were comfortably close to the end, and then pop into print preview to ensure that you were at your end point because Microsoft Word didn’t always have page counts, either.  We had a habit of reading the source material as assigned, or in some instances not reading it and bullshitting our way through the paper.  Often, if you were me, you would wait until 11 pm the night before to start the essay portion.  You’d sit down at your computer in your family’s kitchen and hammer away, hoping that it made some sort of sense.  By the time you were a senior in high school, you got pretty good at adding in some purple prose to stretch it if necessary, usually knowing where transitional words, examples, and multi-word phrases were eligible for swaps for a much more neat and concise answer.  If you were really good at it, or particularly driven, you knew that you could make your thesis long enough to get you to a solid seventy-five to one hundred words.  If your basic essay structure called for a thesis, four body paragraphs, and a conclusion, that meant that each section needed to be about one hundred words long and you were off to the races.  But wait!  You’d get to the end of your essay and find that you were off by about a quarter of the page, so you’d go back through your work and add things.  It could be as small and silly as 3 sentences to each paragraph, with a small bit you remembered or even loosely restating.  Now, here’s the thing.  Your bullshitting skills were a badge of honor.  In a world where school started at seven fifteen am and you didn’t get to leave until ten pm because of afterschool activities or work- and God forbid you had the unfortunate lifestyle to have a before-school activity as well- that usually meant that you had about hours to eat dinner, do homework, shower, and have any sort of fun, job, or social life with your friends or family… And also sleep.  So, you learned how to do it all.  That’s fine, right?  Just do what you need to.  Before you knew it, you were rocking out useless information like it was your job because it was, and it was, supposedly, all in the name of preparing us for the real world.  Even to this day, I can recall bullshitting an essay about homoerotic subtext in The Great Gatsby at 1 am because, in truth, I’d only read about a third of the book and hated every god forsaken second of it.  In those instances, you skimmed websites, you crowd-sourced, you skimmed, and you made it up.  And if you were really good, you’d land pretty close.  All of these are skills that you, too, can hone if you don’t use AI as a crutch and let your brain atrophy into disuse.  The thing that kills me about the use of AI in these ways, even past the particularly and personally stinging plagiarism issues, is that these are skills that are important for navigating the real world- the news, instructions, recipes, travel directions.  Even if you choose, like me, to never pursue higher education for whatever reason, you still NEED to be able to dissect information and discern what is useful.  The people who are relying on AI for all of their academic needs are doing themselves a huge disservice and shooting themselves in the foot.  You don’t have to be able to stomach Animal Farm as a piece.  But you HAVE to be able to get your own information.

There. 669-word opinion-based essay written in about 12 minutes. You're welcome.

im still losing it over the "how did high schoolers write 600 word essays before chatgpt" post. 600 words. that is nothing. that is so few words what do you mean you can't write 600 words. 600 words. this post right here is 45 words.

[holyschnitzel]

Hi holyschnitzel!

A friend showed me the game's demo and I absolutely loved it, I got really obsessed with the character Damon. The game's background is really interesting, so I started following you to keep up with the lore and updates.

However, when I started looking into things, I was surprised that MC basically end up in a three-way relationship with DG and Damon, which isn't apparent in the game.

I don't really like this idea and wanted to ask if this will stay this way or if there will be individual routes where they haven't slept together before (like I see in posts about him taking her virginity) and have just been friends… I saw them as a family and it feels like incest.

I've found out that quite a lot of people think the same.

Thanks a lot for your time

Blastic is having trouble explaining this properly, so I'll take over :)

First of all, thank you for your interest in Broken Colors and for sharing your thoughts. I appreciate your enthusiasm for the game and especially for Damon's character <3 You seem to have some misunderstandings about the relationships in the game, so I'd like to clear that up for you!

Let me clarify that DG and Damon are absolutely not family or related in any way. They are explicitly established as friends (with benefits) who met as adults. There is no familial connection whatsoever between them, so your concern about "incest" doesn't apply to them. Just because you consider them family doesn't make it incestuous, this is not how it works, you naughty little thing you! ;P

Next, regarding Damon's personality and behavior: While Damon does have attachment issues and can be intensely possessive, his relationship with DG is unique and established before the events of the game. Their dynamic is special precisely because DG is the only person Damon trusts enough to consider sharing someone with. This is actually consistent with his character - he's not casually sleeping with multiple people; he has one deeply trusted connection (DG) that allows for this specific arrangement aka poly-relationship.

About the possible routes in the game:

There will be a route where MC ends up with DG.

A route where MC ends up with Damon.

And a poly-route option with both of them.

You're free to choose whichever route appeals to you most. If you prefer a one-on-one relationship with Damon, that route will be available to you. The poly route is simply an additional option for players who might be interested in that dynamic :)

Of course, we understand some players may have different preferences or interpretations, but Blastic wants to stay true to her characters and world she has created. Everything you have read are intentional aspects of the narrative and character development!

Well! I hope this clarifies things. Thanks again for your support and for engaging with the game so thoughtfully, eleipsis! ^o^

[rose-maidenn]

Pick a card : What to manifest this full moon and upcoming days

Happy full moon folks, choose with your intuition and take what resonates, order 1-2-3 hope it helps let me know if it does love love 🌷

Masterlist , Paid readings

Pile 1 :

I see something about relief , if you or anyone around you is suffering from something you're advised to ask for relief and manifest it , something about a lace dress as well , you might wanna wear it the next function, i aslo get that u should eat more fruits and walk your dog . Your English teacher really appreciates you . As per my cards you have to let something go maybe some friendship or relationship, you have to do a cord cutting with this person or situation. It's hampering you , you're clinging to it will your dear life and it's eating all your energy up I'm so sorry but you gotta leave this behind . Learn to take life less seriously sometimes especially in the case of people cause humans are fickle , be stern headed about your goals manifest that your intentions maybe clear this full moon pray for clarity and call out to your soul to give you power to go for what you actually wanna do with your life , let life take you , let your guides and gods carry and cradle you they know what to do . Also get grounded consider red foods , wearing red and do some root chakra meditation. All the best !!!!!

Pile 2:

Are you Egyptian haha or else you might wanna look into the history and culture of Egypt that will be significant in your journey , i also see something about being more athletic this season and planting some flowers in your garden in honour of a deceased someone . This full moon focus on rejuvenation, you know what happens when one works too hard , creativity blocks okay so see I don't think you need to be this harsh on yourself okay you will get everything that you want but in time okay so give yourself and the universe that required time . This full moon manifest a girly community or new friends who understand you and love you for who you are for men manifest a community of men who want to see you win and will support and motivate you . Manifest more help from your guides and pray for building a stronger connection with your guides or gods . If you have applied for a job or exam okay manifest a positive result right now be confident as the answer is most likely a yes , this could also be in the case if you're proposing to someone . Trust your path and manifest to heal you from trust or abandonment issues you're good real good you're amazing you got this !!!!!

Pile 3 :

This full moon pray for understanding that sometimes things happen not to us but for us and this situation is just like it you know sometimes we just need a little understanding to leave a lot of stuff that doesn't belong in your life , you're reaching a deadline for some project or assignment this is a sign to complete it rn . You need rest and last pile needed rest but you need it more than anything , so many things are getting blocked because you don't sleep and keep overthinking, pray that you do not overthink no more things will happen in their own pace you know you just have to do your duty and leave it on God . Manifest your soul family / soul tribe call in real support from people . This full moon manifest that you can let go of karmic baggage from your past lives or this life and start anew with no more contracts or baggage you're new this is new you're rejuvenated . Your soul tribe is so close , think who are the people you feel are from your tribe intuitively and invest your time in them and they will do the same for you in return . Manifest more financial stability and home if you're looking to move out soon . Take care of you !!!!!!

Thanks for reading , have an amazing day 🌷

[concretejunglefm]

Imagine Noah and reader having a baby girl who just started talking and saying “hi” to everyone she sees

You can write a quick one shot, but it’s fine if you don’t want to.

Anygay

I love you💕🎀

Anygay, that's me 🥰 I hope that you like this anon ily 💕

At some point, your bundle of joy, who once did little more than burp and gurgle in your arms, turned into a ball of sunshine, ready to take on the world and say ‘hi’ to every person she meets.

It’s become her new favourite word, right after Dada—even though you and Noah still argue over how it actually sounded.

“She’s not saying Dada,” you insist one night, huffy at the thought that your daughter would choose that word first over any for you.

“Are you sure about that?” Noah smirks. He’s been gloating ever since she uttered that first wobbly attempt, and he doesn’t even try to hide it.

Now it’s ‘hi’—not just to you or family or friends, but to complete strangers on the street. You barely make it a block with her toddling along beside you before she’s stopping in front of someone, grinning up at them with her whole face, and chirping, “Hi!”

No matter how many times you try to enforce ‘stranger danger,’ she just looks back at you with wide, curious eyes, blowing bubbles, clearly too young to understand, and completely indifferent unless your warning comes in the same honey-smooth voice as her Dada.

She also doesn’t care that just because her dad is behind a closed door, it means he’s working.

Now she sits outside the door to his home studio, stuffed animal in hand, peering up at it like it might magically open if she stares hard enough. It’s been hours since Noah slipped inside with the rest of the band to work on the upcoming album, and you’ve been trying everything to distract her.

“Come on, bug! Let’s go watch Peppa Pig!” you sing, upping your cadence to coax some excitement out of her.

Nothing. Just your baby girl sitting on the floor, pouting for her favourite person in the entire world.

With a sigh, you flop down beside her, only lifting your head when the door creaks open and Jolly’s deep chuckle fills the hallway, along with the sound of your name.

“Noah thought he heard you out here,” Jolly says, smiling as he towers over the both of you.

Your daughter stretches her arms up to him and lets her favourite word slip out. “Hi.”

Jolly gasps dramatically, pressing a hand to his chest. “Hi?! You’re talking now? No way!”

She tries to push up onto her legs, wobbles, and lands right back on her bum. Jolly chuckles and gently lifts her by the arms, placing her steady on her feet. That’s all it takes for her to stumble forward between his legs and waddle right into the studio.

From where you sit, you hear the chorus erupt, her enthusiastic ‘hi!’ met with laughter and echoing greetings from the guys inside.

It’s Folio who scoops her up next, her tiny hands grabbing his face as she giggles and repeats, “Hi.”

Folio makes a strangled noise, as if she’s just pierced his heart clean through. You know the feeling all too well, she’s a weapon of pure cuteness.

“She’s obsessed with attention,” Noah teases from somewhere inside.

“Gee, I wonder where she got that from,” you mutter, rolling your eyes as you push off the floor and step into the room.

Noah spins around in his chair, that boyish grin already spreading across his face. “No idea,” he says softly, reaching out for you like you’re gravity.

He looks at you the way your daughter looks at him—with something bigger than words could ever convey. He’s practically glowing, especially when Folio steps closer and your daughter spots her dad again. Her arms stretch toward him, and she sings, “Hi, Dada!” Noah doesn’t even try to act cool and you see the way he melts.

The second she says those words, he takes her back into his arms like it’s the only thing he ever wants to do. His heart is wide open, his smile pure and he looks between the two of you like he can’t believe this is real—like he’s never been happier in his life, and has no intention of hiding it.

[drdemonprince]

Hi doc, do you have any tips for a person who’s friends keep trying to convince her she’s queer? I’m cishet, but some of my queer friends keep insisting I must be queer. I started dating a nb transmasc and their comments got more frequent after that, saying how I have to be queer because a straight person can’t date a nb person and still be straight. (I’ve discussed it with my partner, and they are fine with my IDing as het.) I take it as an honour that I have so many great queer friends who feel so comfortable around me. However, it makes me uncomfortable, in part because I honestly would really like to be part of the community. I find the culture of queerness beautiful and attractive and fascinating. I’m ashamed to admit that I even went out with a friend who asked me out. She was everything I’d want in a partner minus gender and we had great chemistry as friends. However, I just couldn’t feel attracted to her in that way, so I called it off after a few dates. We’re still friends, but I deeply regret treating her that way. I think when they make the comments, it stings because they’re telling me who I am and  because I would really like to be part of the community but can’t be. Also, they keep saying that a woman who prefers effeminate men couldn’t be straight, which kind of feels like an incel talking point. I know this is a small potatoes problem to have, and very privileged, and I’m not a victim in this scenario (if anything, I’m the oppressor) or anything, but it’s awkward and any advice would be appreciated. 

I think your friends are being gross on multiple different levels and that you should tell them so! It needn't be a grand political statement, all you have to say is something like "I don't like other people telling me how I feel, thank you," or "My sexuality is up to me to define, I hope you can respect that." and repeating it like a broken record whenever anyone gets to making weird, invasive remarks.

There is a long legacy of queer people stomping all over the sexual boundaries of the women in their lives, and this comes from a misogynistic disregard for women's autonomy that you don't have to be in the oppressor class to possess because it is so, so damn normalized. Bisexual women are told they are really just straight, lesbians are pressured to be bisexual, and straight women are, occasionally, told by their queer friends that they should just quit dating men already if they want to stop being mistreated (as if a person can easily choose to change their sexual orientation). It is disrespectful, it shifts the blame for misogynistic violence back onto the woman simply for deciding to date people she is attracted to, and it creates a broader culture of women not trusting their own feelings when those feelings are at all inconvenient to others.

You deserve to push back on all that! No matter how much your friends think it's all in good fun or acceptable because you are in the cishet majority and they are oppressed. Our personal relationships should not be a symbolic political battleground, and your friends' grievances with compulsory heterosexuality are not fixed by getting to bully and fuck with you. That's just not how friends should be treating one another. And so you get to tell your friends to cut out this shit, that it makes you uncomfortable, that they shouldn't be speaking for either you OR your queer transmasc partner, and that it's weird to act as if effeminate men are not actually men, and are not attractive. If after repeated warnings your friends keep pulling this move, you will have to figure out how you'd like to maintain the boundary yourself. Things like hanging up the phone, stepping away, or refusing to continue the conversation while emphasizing that you feel uncomfortable and disrespected are all good options. Any good friend should be able to put aside their own agendas once they realize they are repeatedly hurting you. If someone is completely unrepentant about it after multiple warnings, then you've learned something important about them.

[ruby-red-inky-blue]

i am so delighted with Andor 2.10 "Make It Stop". It's like for the first time, this became the show I always wanted it to be for an entire episode. it's so good it has everything, the gorgeous clean visuals, the beautifully efficient dialogue, a return to a show-don't-tell approach to storytelling, spy shenanigans without hand-holding and overexplanation, genuinely brutal and morally reprehensible acts that are necessary but evil, actions that look like they make sense for an operative who has been in the trenches and actually knows what they are doing. And we finally get the two things that should have always been at the core of this premise:

the tragedy is in character consistency. You set a character up to be a certain way, you show how they got there, you make us sympathetic to why they are like that. Then you put them in a situation where we don't want them to react the way we know they are going to. And then they do anyway. And it's a win! It's a win for the cause! But also we're so heartbroken for them!! It's so tragic! It's hopeful and sad and it feels so weighty and inevitable, this is what I wanted this show to feel like!

The greatest proof of love in a story where the spies and the zealots are the sympathetic protagonists should be this. It should be "I will choose the Rebellion over you, because I know that's what you would have wanted, and I will regret that choice for the rest of my life but I'll know that you would have never forgiven me if I had chosen you instead"

And the thing is, this should have been Cassian and Draven. This is exactly the dynamic that was implied between Cassian and Draven in the retconned canon - this is how you do the "abduct a child for their safety" storyline!!! Luthen (and, between the lines of the Fest backstory, Draven) grab a feral, hypercompetent child out of the jaws of Imperial crackdowns knowing they're saving their life but in full awareness that the life they are giving this child will not be a good one. And they are both the kind of man who would look that fact in the eye and who would come to love that child and put them through it anyway. For The Cause. This is the story I always wanted to see and honestly, right now I'm not even mad we're getting it with different characters, I'm just sad there wasn't more of it. But this was perfect.

[tranquilreign]

superhuman | series | I.

- © tranquilreign - all rights reserved | DO NOT STEAL, TAKE or COPY any of MY WORK without MY PERMISSION.

pairing; jungkook/reader genre: mafia au! dystopian au! tattoo artist au! warnings: alcohol consumption, drug consumption, sexual themes, swearing, death, blood, violence, eyeball stuff (please if you are squeamish take care) word count: 3.3k synopsis: the year 2107, seven years after the first superhuman was confirmed. Though few in numbers, they are dangerous. deadly. as their appearances have become more frequent, you have your identity hidden for your own safety. but the superhumans seem to be one step ahead. notes: please understand that the mafia/tattoo artist au is inspired by wattpad story blood ink by pocketbangtan. nothing else. taglist: @taekrve @taerjin @softhaes

⊱ ────── {⋅. ♪ .⋅} ────── ⊰

The rain poured down heavily, soaking the vibrant streets of Seoul as you weaved through the bustling crowd. After much contemplation and gathering the courage, you were finally on your way to a tattoo studio, hoping to arrive before it closed.

After conducting thorough research and exploring various websites and Instagram pages, you finally found the perfect tattoo studio. Initially, you felt uncertain because the studio only employed male tattoo artists and had a rather hardcore vibe.

That changed once you saw that they welcomed newcomers to tattoos. You followed your map under your umbrella, murmuring quiet 'excuse me's' as you pushed through the crowd.

"Two minutes away," you said to yourself.

As you rounded the last corner, you spotted the studio's sign in the distance. It gleamed in bright neon red, with the letters "BTS" prominently illuminated. Beneath that, the words "Body Tattoo Studio" were displayed. For some reason, you found the name of the place particularly appealing.

You sprinted down the street, closing your umbrella despite the relentless rain. The downpour soaked through to your skin, making you shiver from the sudden cold. When you arrived, you stopped, placing your hand on the wall and heaving to catch your breath.

The sound of a door opening caught your attention, and you looked up. A head was poking out from behind the glass doors of the studio, looking everywhere until it's eyes landed on you.

"Oh! Hello there," the man chirped cheerfully. "Are you alright? You look rather wet."

"I'm-" you gasped, "-I'm fine. Just wanted-" another pause. "Wanted to get here before you closed," you replied, struggling to get the last part of your sentence out.

"Well, come on in! I'll make you something to drink. Do you want coffee? Tea? Perhaps a hot chocolate?"

The door to the studio swung wide open, and you entered without hesitation. You grabbed your arms in a poor attempt to try and warm yourself up.

"Tea, please, if you wouldn't mind," you spoke, taking in your surroundings.

The waiting area was filled with tattoo designs showcasing various styles. You were in awe, wondering how to choose one among so many.

"See one you like?"

The sudden voice made you jump, making you look around for the owner. Your eyes fell upon another man. He was slightly taller than the one who let you in, leaning against the counter, arms folded. His hair was dark, contrasting elegantly with his beauty

"I don't know. There are so many to choose from," you responded honestly. "But they are beautiful," you quickly added.

The man hummed, moving behind the counter and sitting in a computer chair. He didn't have many tattoos, but you took note of the one that ran up his forearm. It looked as though it was a barcode, but with large numbers underneath. 21001031.

At that moment, the man from before returned, holding a cardboard cup of tea. He handed it to you with a smile.

"Thank you," you mumbled, blowing on the hot liquid to cool it quicker. "I'm sorry. I was just speaking with your colleague, and I haven't actually picked one out," you admitted, suddenly growing embarrassed at your lack of preparation.

"That's fine," the man replied. He suddenly gasped. "Please forgive me, I forgot to introduce myself! My name is Mirage."

The man held out his hand, which you gently took with your free one. You smiled, glancing over to the other man who was looking between the two of you.

"It's nice to meet you, Mirage," you smiled. "That's a really unique name." The man laughed.

"Oh no. They're just our artist names. My actual name is Tae-"

The man was cut off by a sudden cough. You both looked in the direction of the man in the chair, who was staring Mirage down. Nervously, he chuckled, rubbing the back of his neck with his hand.

"Sorry about him. We keep our names classified. We've had a few customers in the past who have caused us a bit of trouble."

Your eyes widened at his words. What did he mean by trouble? As if Mirage sensed your worry, he suddenly stuttered and waved his hands in front of him frantically.

"I just mean with stalking! We've had a few customers here in the past who have taken a liking to some of our artists. So for our own safety, we started to use fake names."

"Ah," you responded. "Well, I'm Y/n."

There was a silence in the air, tense. You looked at the two men, wondering if you had said anything offensive. Mirage quickly smiled again, putting his hands on his hips.

"Well, I have to head through to the back! I have a client soon. If you need any help, speak to Doc. He'll help you with anything you need."

With that, Mirage scurried away into the back, leaving you alone with the man you now knew as 'Doc.'

"Is there a particular design you have in mind?" he suddenly asked. "Like, are you a fan of flowers, or animals-"

"Animals," you replied quickly. "I like animals."

"It shouldn't be too hard to find one you like, then. We have loads to choose from," Doc explained, getting up from his chair and standing next to you. "Any particular animal?"

You stood for a moment, never having thought about what animals you actually liked. You were never usually picky; you liked them all.

"I suppose, maybe a snake? I quite like the idea of having a cunning animal," you answered.

Doc thought for a moment, processing what you had just said. He then moved back behind the counter and hauled out a large black binder from underneath the tabletop, thumping it down onto the surface.

"When it comes to a cunning animal, foxes are typically what people tend to think of. Snakes are a good option too for that as well, though, so your idea wasn't entirely wrong."

'Wrong?' you thought, scowling slightly at the man's words.

"Sorry, I just meant that when it comes to cunning animals, a snake most likely wouldn't be a first pick," Doc corrected, noticing your frown.

You shrugged, both of you now looking through the binder together at the various animal tattoos. You slammed your hand down onto the page, startling Doc.

"This one," you breathed.

It was a snake, its body wrapping around itself continuously as if it were infinite. The intricate details of the scales mesmerised you, as if the snake were real.

"You sure? This is a pretty big piece, and with it being your first tattoo-"

"How do you know it's my first tattoo?" you asked suddenly, eyeing him suspiciously.

"I can just tell. You have that vibe about you. And no offence, you look clueless," Doc chuckled at your expression.

You huffed.

"Alright, so it's my first tattoo. But I have a high pain tolerance, I know I can handle it."

"Alright," Doc sighed, leaning over to the desk opposite you and grabbing a clipboard. "I'm going to need your details. You are over eighteen, right?"

"Yeah. I'm twenty-three."

"Good. If you just fill this out, I'll get Wraith to come and have a chat with you."

Doc walked away, leaving you to fill out the paperwork in silence. You moved, sitting down at one of the seats against the side wall, throwing your leg over the other.

You filled out the paperwork quickly, letting the clipboard sit in your lap as your leg bounced, your nerves returning now that you were alone. Deciding that sitting was making you more anxious than you needed to be, you stood up, wandering around the room looking at all the designs.

They truly were beautiful, making a mental note of the artist's names in the bottom right corner of each design. You seemed to like their styles most.

You suddenly felt a presence behind you, startling you. You spun on the spot, bouncing back and holding up your fists, ready to defend yourself. The man in front of you eyed you, confused. Seeing that he posed no threat to you, you sighed, letting your hands drop to your sides.

"Sorry, you startled me," you breathed.

"That's quite alright," he replied.

His voice was smooth, alluring. He looked at you with such intensity that it sent shivers down your spine. The man tilted his head, a smile gracing his features as he looked at you.

"You fight?" he asks.

"What?"

"Do you fight? The defensive position you took when you moved away makes it seem like you fight," the man explained.

"Ah," you said. "Yeah, I took taekwondo when I was younger."

"Oh!~" the man mused. "Black belt?"

You nodded, making the man's smile widen. He stepped closer to you, taking your hand in his. You could barely think, your mind growing hazy at his touch. It was like you were being wrapped in a blanket of silk, and you didn't want to leave.

"A pretty woman like you shouldn't be fighting," he mused, brushing his thumb over your knuckles. "Do you not have someone to protect you?"

You were in a daze, chest heaving as desire filled you. The smile on the man's face had turned into a smirk, watching as you fell under what you could only describe as his spell.

In that moment, you bit your lip hard. The pain pulled you out of the drowsiness. You pulled your hand away, taking the man aback.

"I'm afraid I don't need anyone to protect me. I don't want to put that burden on anyone else," you explained, smiling at him.

You had no idea what had just happened, whether it was a moment of confusion or you spaced out, you didn't know. Only now realising just how hard you bit your lip, you winced. An unfamiliar metallic taste sat in your mouth, a clear sign you were bleeding. Gently, you pressed your fingers to your lips.

"Shit," you cursed. "Do you have a tissue?"

The man walked behind the counter in silence, pulling out a packet of wipes and handing one to you. Quickly thanking him, you pressed it against your lip, the chemicals stinging your small wound.

Doc had returned, the man you assumed to be Wraith following close behind him. The two men looked between you and the man in front of you, analysing the situation.

"Siren, what did you do to her?" Doc scolded, moving towards the shorter man and smacking him on the back of the head.

"Ow! I didn't do anything," Siren pouted, rubbing the back of his head.

"Well, you did something. She wasn't bleeding when I left her."

You watched as the two men squabbled, stifling a giggle. Your gaze drifted to Wraith, and your breath hitched as you took in his appearance. He wore a tight, plain black t-shirt that hugged his body perfectly. Black ink adorned his neck and extended down to the sleeve of his right arm. His dark hair matched his eyes, creating an effect as if you were staring into a black hole—dangerous yet utterly mesmerising. Pulling yourself out of yet another trance, you turned your attention back to Siren and Doc.

"I bit my lip, is all," you explained. "I was feeling- well, I don't actually know what I was feeling. Drowsy maybe? I know that sudden pain helps keep you alert, so I bit my lip. Maybe a bit harder than I intended."

Doc looked at Siren for a moment, then back at you, unsure of what to make of what you said. Instead, he chose to ignore it, placing his arm around your shoulder and escorting you over to Wraith.

"What have I told you about smoking inside the studio?" Doc sighed, shaking his head.

Wraith held a cigarette between his lips, hunting for his lighter in his jeans pockets. You eyed him as he moved, unable to stop watching the way his muscles flexed ever so slightly. Doc muttered under his breath, walking away.

"Fuck, must have left it back in the room," Wraith cursed.

Finally, his attention turned to you. He looked you up and down, an eyebrow raised. He removed the cigarette from his mouth, letting his tongue dart across his upper lip.

"So you want a snake?"

"I uh, yes," you fumbled, feeling rather foolish.

You couldn't help but bite your lower lip, drawing more blood from your bite wound. You silently cursed yourself for forgetting and quickly wiped away the blood with the wipe Siren gave you.

"Good. Come with me."

You followed behind him to one of the back rooms in the studio. It was a small room, with only a chair and a table in the centre of the room. Wraith moved to sit down in the chair, making a grab for the lighter.

"Doc showed me the snake design you liked. You chose the best one."

"Oh? I did?" you spoke, smiling.

"Of course. I drew it," Wraith replied with a smug look.

Oh, he's one of those guys.

"I see. Well, I really like your drawing style," you complimented, still standing at the door.

Wraith lit his cigarette and leaned back in his chair. He turned his head to look at you, silently urging you to come closer. You obeyed and moved next to him.

"Sit on the table and I can get you set up."

"Alright," you answered, moving to sit down. "Would you happen to know any good places to get-"

You were silenced when Wraith stood in front of you suddenly, gripping you by the hair, pulling your head back. You had no time to let out a yell, and he pulled his tattoo gun so it was millimetres away from your eye. You stopped breathing, scared the slightest movement would result in having a needle in your eye.

"You are really brave coming here alone, you know," Wraith whispered, his breath fanning against your face.

Wraith pulled the needle away from your eye, pulling you up by your hair to make you stand. You let out a strangled yelp, but it was quickly silenced by a hand covering your mouth.

"I could hardly believe it when Doc came through and said you had walked in. And just after we started planning your capture. How convenient indeed."

You were confused, tears pricking your eyes, at the immense pain in your scalp was in. Wraith leaned down to your level, letting his lips brush over your ear.

"Don't worry, love, we won't kill you. You're simply too valuable to us dead."

Your eyes widened at his words. He grinned, letting go of your hair and stepping back. Wraith's head was tilted, arms open slightly as if inviting you to try to escape.

You quickly moved, suddenly grabbing the chair and holding it in front of you to create a barricade between you. he chuckled. You held the arms of the chair tightly, staring at him with fear and anger.

"And what's this going to do, hm? Even if you get past me, which I doubt you will, six more of us are waiting for you outside this room," Wraith grinned, watching you closely.

You tried not to look away from him to find something to defend yourself with. He would be able to read your every move otherwise. He moved slightly to lean against the wall, waiting for you to react.

"Give it your best shot, love. I do enjoy a challenge."

Everything happened so fast before either of you realised what was happening. You had pretended to push the chair to the left, instead bringing it back and putting your foot on it. You kicked it towards Wraith with such force that the back hit him in the stomach, winding him momentarily.

You jumped over the tattoo bench and flipped it onto its side, moving to hide behind it. This gave you time to look around the room for something to grab. You noticed a towel lying on the floor. You crawled over to it, grabbed it, and stood back up.

Enraged, Wraith grabbed the chair and threw it out of his way, crashing against the wall and breaking the mirror next to it. You flinched at his strength. He moved, quicker than you had ever seen anyone move, and attempted to jab your side.

Using the towel, you wrapped it underneath his wrist and pushed upwards, the blow barely missing you. With his stance now broken, it created an opening for you to land a powerful kick into his side. He stumbled back, watching as you moved into a defensive stance.

"Taekwondo," he breathed out a laugh. "I hate to break it to you, love, but you're not beating me. No one ever has, or ever will."

"Looks like you're doing a pretty shit job then," you taunted.

His eyes burned with rage and excitement at your words. His speed was unlike any other, moving in so close and quickly that you couldn't react this time. Wraith grabbed your wrists and pinned you down to the ground.

Struggling against his iron-like grip, you wriggled underneath him. He chuckled, leaning down so his lips barely grazed your ear. He wasn't out of breath, surprising you when he spoke smoothly.

"Goodnight, love."

He pinned your hands above your head, holding them down with one hand as he moved the other to the back of your neck. Running his hand up your back, you shivered, feeling his fingers gently grip your neck. He pressed hard against your skin, making your body go limp.

to be continued...

⊱ ────── {⋅. ♪ .⋅} ────── ⊰

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tranquilreign~

[monstersflashlight]

Hey, I love you content. Really totally love it. Is it weird to say that it makes me relax ?

Anyhow I read a tumblr post today about some really nice gentle giant movers and packers and I wanted to ask you if you could write a human×minotaur drabble/post about the human hiring a company of movers and packers with incredible reviews and these massive human guys show up who are all so nice and sweet and then this more massive minotaur shows up and you think that he would be lifting heavy furniture but he begins to carefully wrap all the delicate items and then he helps in lifting the heavy furniture which makes all the humans huff and gruff but he's making a specific grunt sound once in a while which travels straight down to your core.

You were too stressed that day to focus on him but that doesn't mean that you didn't touch yourself to the thought of him late at night once they all left. Without your knowledge he tucked away a few of your things and he kept coming back to return them to you. You were still unpacking so you didn't actually know how much was missing and were very grateful and always offered him something in return i.e. drinks or snacks or just hanging out for a bit which turns into him helping you out to sort stuff.

One day he shows up just as you have gotten out of the shower and were in the middle of a mastμrbating session and he can smell it on you. It makes him go feral and then after everything's done he gets all cuddly and purrs a little bit (I read somewhere that cows and some bulls purr when they're happy just like cats do)

I'm sorry if this was too long. I love your writing because it tickles very niche and specific interests and I wanted to throw the whole idea out there. Thank you so much if you choose to write this and thank you so much regardless.

A/N: Hi there! It makes me happy that you like my content, thank you so much for being here and reading my stuff. <3 Hope you like this!

Moving company

Minotaur x fem!reader || sex toys, oral sex

When you decided to move, someone at work recommended you a monster moving company, claiming they would do the job in half the time. Which they did. But still was a surprise when a team of four minotaurs showed at your door and started moving boxes as if they weighted nothing. You had never enjoyed watching someone as much as you did that day. Their rippling muscles flexing and bulging, sweat running down their torsos and foreheads as they moved your stuff around. By the time they left, you were wet and ready to get beyond fucked.

But wasn’t until a couple days later that one of the movers, the one with the long hair and pretty hazel eyes, appeared on your doorstep with a box of books, excusing himself and his crew because they forgot to bring that one in. You thanked him, offering him some of the tea you were preparing. He agreed, and you started talking, enjoying his company a bit more than necessary. He left that evening with a smile and your phone number.

And he appeared again and again, always with the excuse of something he forgot to bring you, until you brought it up and he shyly admitted he liked you and wanted to know you better. You (obviously) kissed him that day, and you made out like teenagers. It was fantastic and you craved more and more.

But he was a perfect gentleman, always appearing with a flower or some sweets, glad to be spending time with you without sexual expectations. Or at least that’s what you thought. But you weren’t like that, you were a horny human with a monster kink who was dating a minotaur… and you wanted to get destroyed.

But since he’s not doing anything to make that happen, you get out the big guns, aka: your biggest dildo. You are bouncing on it, on the edge of what feels like a great orgasm when the doorbell rings. You let out a short cry, startled, and consider not answering, but you know who it is. There’s no other who would show up at your house uninvited.

So you put up some pants, and a shirt and walk to the door. As expected, your minotaur boyfriend is there, with a cupcake in one hand and a rose in the other and looking incredibly handsome. You almost moan at the sight, your pussy still tingling.

You see the exact second his nostrils flare and he smells the juices still sticking to your pussy, still wet from your activities. You watch his eyes darken and his body tensing. He drops the flower and the muffin and lets out a tiny groan.

Then he launches.

You let out a screech when his big body collides with your middle and he pulls you up over his shoulder, grunting about mattresses and flat surfaces. You half-heatedly point to your right, to your bedroom, and he kicks the door open with his hoof.

You let out an amused huff, slapping his ass and getting a slap in return, which only makes you groan. That snaps him out of his trance, throwing you to the mattress and kneeling on the floor, pulling your legs to him until your covered pussy is in in front of his face and he’s looking at you for permission.

“Yes,” you moan.

He rips your yoga pants in the middle, his big rough tongue over your pussy in a second as he devours you and groans at the taste. “Were you playing with this pretty cunt?” You nod, rolling your hips against his exploring fingers, trying to get him to push them inside. “So naughty, fucking what’s mine…” His possessive tone makes your legs tremble at the same time he pushes two fingers inside of you and sucks on your clit while you cry out. “Give me the toy, darling. I want to see how pretty your pussy looks around it,” he grunts. You do as told.

He takes no time pushing the toy inside of you, cooing as you groan. He fucks it into your already welcoming heat, your pussy stretching to the brim as he grunts with each thrust as if it’s his own dick being feed into your hungry cunt. You can’t get enough of it, begging for more over and over.

And when his tongue joins, licking your clit at the same time he twists his wrist to get the toy to the perfect angle… You come messily, screaming his name as loud as possible as you lose control of your movements and roll your hips down against the toy and his warm tongue.

You open your eyes a few seconds later to find him lowering his pants and keeling between your open legs. “Now you take me,” he says with a growl, his dick in his hand, way bigger than the dildo…

Fuck yeah.

[pennyblossom-meta]

Do you believe L would prefer to be with someone who is smart academic wise or some other brainy smart or would he not mind someone who is “average” but has something outside of academics they may excel at? (history, cooking, art, baking, sports etc)

Hi there anon! Thanks for question. I've actually theorised about this exact topic a couple of times before, and I might actually have an unorthodox opinion about it. But before I start my analysis, I would like to refer you to a few metas that I personally find extremely compelling and which have also shaped my view of L.

Toxic love, by @lunalit-river

An analysis on L's monster speech by lux-mea-lex (lots of great metas in their livejournal)

A short interpretation of the monster speech by @lawlightautismtruther (also check the debate on that one, it's very interesting to see the different opinions across the fandom)

How L and Light judge each other and other people

Just about most of @my-one-true-l 's metas about L, like this one and this one about L's flaws.

@43501 has a great meta about L in a relationship which I agree with wholeheartedly.

Apologies in advance for the length in this rant of mine. I like to analyse L from different angles, as you might've guessed 😛

Short answer:

I think L would appreciate someone who makes an effort to meet him where he's at and accepts him for who he is. Someone he can have a conversation with, but is ultimately kind and trustworthy. These two qualities would be to L like a lifeline, because it's something he's missing on an intimate level. While Watari is loyal to him and cares about his well being, these are different types of relationships.

>>>>>Long answer under the cut

So, one of the things I find that helps me when looking at L from this romantic perspective is to search for clues across canon (manga, anime) and the expanded universe (L:CtW, LA:BB, drama, Spiraling Trap, etc) that explain what's going on in his head and, most importantly, what makes him interested in people.

As per your question:

Do you believe L would prefer to be with someone who is smart academic wise or some other brainy smart or would he not mind someone who is “average” but has something outside of academics they may excel at? (history, cooking, art, baking, sports etc)

Let's approach this in two parts. If we were analysing this from a relationship POV, whether romantic or platonic, I can see two major interpretations:

(Chapter 20: First move) Here's a screenshot of L losing a tennis match to Light. Makes him less daunting, doesn't it? To know even L can lose at not-so-mundane-but-still-quite-normal things he's supposed to be great at.

01: The intellectual allure vs a supportive SO

There's oceans of difference between being a genius and someone who can give L support and companionship, despite not speaking the same "language". This would not be too dissimilar to couples with wildly different career paths (ex: a nurse and a software developer) who meet halfway and actively choose to understand each other. It has to do with common goals and values, your life project together.

Love is something you choose every day. Staying in a long-term relationship is choosing to be vulnerable and to share your life with someone you find kinship with. Unorthodox L may be, but as Fu Takahashi (who plays L in the 2020 musical) said:

(...) despite his superficial image as a smart guy who hates losing, he actually feels lonely and needs affection, I imagine (...) He tries to control his emotions, like the feelings towards his parents, or romantic feelings; that’s why he is sort of dependent on games or battles of the mind.

The above quote is super important, in my opinion, considering how difficult it is to pin down L's true personality. If we go by Spiraling Trap terms, he falls for a main character who pays attention to his (dessert) needs and makes him feel 'seen'. Taken cared of. Someone who is genuinely kind to him and wants to do him a good turn because they care about him. We can extrapolate that this is, perhaps, due to his isolationist tendencies and lack of meaningful contact with the sort who take time to want to know the true L and what he likes. To that kind of person, L isn't just the world's greatest detective or a machine, lacking human emotion --- that person acknowledges that he has feelings, likes and dislikes, and isn't malicious towards him.

Consider that L lies a lot. He'd lie twice saying "good morning" if it suited him, which makes for an unhealthy dynamic. However, for those he truly cares about, I believe he would be far more careful to safeguard the few genuine connections he has in life and thus try to curb some bad behaviours to the best of his ability.

I believe @43501 put it best when they mentioned how L would prefer an [educated, clever partner] but that he'd be drawn to people who are [interesting and offbeat]. I would argue this doesn't mean a double PhD level of intelligence, but rather someone who is curious about the world, who talks to him like an equal (i.e., not as if he's superior or inferior to them). There would need to be something to that person that made them unique to L --- but uniqueness in the context of someone who suppresses their emotions so strongly, and would find themselves to be starving for affection once they found that source of comfort and support, I believe that uniqueness could be kindness.

Accept the man despite his quirks and flaws, in all his intensity, and I believe it would be impossible for L to be indifferent to that kind of genuine devotion. After all, he's been without all his life and likely never thought he'd find it. It's possible that, in his loneliness, a part of him even thought himself to be above such things, but what a tumble it would be, for L to find that he's a man dying of thirst.

...

Now, in manga canon (and throughout the source material closest to it), L and Light find a degree of interest in each other for how similar they are in intellect. This creates a connection, even respect between the two, allowing them to see beyond each other's mask. It's thrilling, a cat and mouse game which they arguably become addicted to. Once L dies, Light even muses how Near is lacking by comparison, undeserving.

However, if we go by what V13:HTR says regarding their relationship, then L does think quite poorly of Light beyond their matching intellect. This is more or less explicit in a couple of scenes in the manga and anime where L muses about how much Light talks, how cheesy he is with his faux morality, putting up an act.

No matter L's interest in the game with Light, he doesn't trust him. Trust is paramount to build a healthy relationship. Theirs would be a toxic, petty relationship standing on foundations of distrust, and a thirst for constant competition.

From this perspective, L arguably wouldn't be in love, but stuck in an addictive powerplay. Very engaging to read about; certainly challenging (and interesting!) to write — but not so good to live through. The best case scenario I can see for such a relationship would be something like the series Vicious with Sir Ian McKellen and Derek Jacobi, in which they settle into a constant clash of snark.

I talk here about the prospect of L being 'out of balance' emotionally, which makes him dive into games of the mind to distract himself from his burdens.

02. Appreciation for another type of individual, the average...Sam?

(Chapter 21: Duplicity) Added this one here because this exchange always makes me chuckle.

I'd like to focus on the 2015 drama to establish a parallel with this 'average' Sam concept.

In this adaptation, Light is far more 'normal' than in any other. He diverges from his original canon self in various ways, though the most interesting for me was how the drama tried to show what Light, as a regular young adult, could be if he wasn't an extreme genius, a perfect guy in the eyes of society --- and how this shift would contrast with L.

Drama Light:

Goes to concerts

Is a fanboy

Is clumsy

Gets bullied

He's not the perfect guy with an immaculate reputation. It brings him further down to the ground, like us common mortals.

Both L and Light found solace and appreciation in the differences of their mindset. A more 'average' Light still managed to connect with L, leading to this scene:

If we consider the drama and then extrapolate a few conclusions from these interactions, we can argue that an 'average' but grounding presence in L's life would do him good. An uber genius might be able to follow L's thought process more easily, but they can still become an issue or more easily turn on him for the intellectual competition and to surpass the world's greatest detective.

...

TLDR; I would argue that an average individual would still be a perfect match for L, perhaps far more than an incredible genius. L would value kindness and care far more than super intellect, especially if he was on the receiving end of this kind of genuine connection.

[ihaveopinionsonalotofthings]

The Percabeth hate is ridiculous

When I first found out that people hated percabeth, I thought it was a joke. And then when I went down the rabbit hole of WHY they hate the ship, I had to take an entire day to process all that information because the 'proof' that percabeth is toxic and abusive, is so far fetched, it's not even funny.

I'm not gonna try to convince people to ship percabeth if they don't want to. Everyone is allowed to have ships that they like and dislike. Even if that ship is THE OTP of the fandom. But the thing is, you can dislike a ship just because. You don't need a reason. You don't need to make up reasons. If you want to ship Percy with some other character or if you prefer Percy and Annabeth as friends, you can just do that. You don't need to prove that Annabeth and Percy are horrible for each other.

As I said I'm not trying to push my agenda on people who choose to stick with their (made up) perspective of canon. You can like what you like and hate what you hate. I just need to get this off my chest.

So this is everything I have to say about the, twisted until it no longer resembles canon 'evidence', that 'proves' that Annabeth is evil incarnate, and that percabeth is a horrible ship.

This is probably going to be a very long rant. So hold on tight.

1) The first piece of evidence is the 'name calling'. The fact that Annabeth calls Percy 'seaweed brain' is somehow controversial? I don't understand why. Especially because percy is the first one to call Annabeth 'wise girl', and though the nickname has the word 'wise' in it, it was not a compliment. But everyone just forgot that?

There's also the fact that by the end of the first book, the nicknames have become endearing for them. It's a cute thing they call each other. But apparently it's not cute to the Annabeth haters.

This evidence leaves me with a few questions. Do your friends not have humiliating nicknames for you? Does that mean they hate you? Do you even have friends at all?

2) The second piece of evidence is her 'treatment of rachel'. What about it? Sure, jealousy isn't a healthy emotion. But almost everyone feels it at least once in their life. Annabeth is a teenage girl who was witnessing the guy she liked, the guy she KISSED, hanging around with another girl.

More than that, she was scared that Percy was going to abandon her. Everyone she loved, left her behind. Luke chose Kronos. Thalia chose the hunters. And her father chose the mortal woman who gave him a chance at a normal life that Annabeth couldn't.

That's what she sees. She sees the possibility of Percy abandoning her for Rachel. So she lashes out. She's mean to Percy and Rachel. But it's her that saved Rachel's life in TLO. She's the reason Rachel is still alive. And Annabeth and Rachel do eventually make up and become good friends. I can't believe that we've come full circle from the intense Rachel hate just to hate on Annabeth.

And does no one have anything to say about Percy also feeling jealous over Annabeth with Luke. How come when Percy does it, it's cute, but when it's Annabeth, it's toxic? Annabeth doesn't show similar jealousy with Reyna or Nico because her jealousy wasn't about someone stealing Percy. It was about Percy leaving her behind. Her jealousy wasn't unreasonable. And she got over it and moved on.

3) The third bit of evidence that makes them horrible for each other is their 'codependency'. Why wouldn't they be codependent? After everything they've been through (that I hope I won't have to list out), it would make sense. But even then, they're not even really codependent. They still have their own lives separate from each other. They just choose to stay close to each other because they feel safe together. I would be surprised if they weren't codependent. Why is their codependency, that isn't even really actual codependency, such a big deal.

4) The next evidence is the 'physical abuse'. I can't even with this one. The fact that Annabeth playfully punches Percy in the gut because he was being a clueless idiot in TTC, or the fact that she kicked his shins to get him stop talking in MOA does not mean that she's abusive.

I understand that play fighting isn't everyone's thing. And there's absolutely no need to put up with anything that you don't like. But that doesn't take away from the fact that Rick meant for those instances to be friendly play fighting. Just because you think it's abusive, doesn't make it canon.

And before you ask, 'Well if Percy was the one to hit Annabeth, or if he hit her back, then would you have the same opinion?' Yes. Yes I would. I have male friends that hit me (not seriously, for fun). I hit them back. If I hit them first, I expect them to get even. I don't care. I don't think a little play fighting with friends is unhealthy. But you can. You can care. You're allowed to have boundaries. But I don't care.

5) Now for the big finish. The judo flip scene. This is the only instance where the haters have some basis. But I don't think it's enough. I understand how someone can interpret the scene as an example of abuse. But the intention of the scene is what matters. Annabeth doesn't intend to hurt percy. The scene isn't really about Percy at all. He doesn't care. He laughs at her and starts flirting. He maybe even thinks it's hot. Percy has recognised abuse in Gabe. He doesn't see it in Annabeth.

Annabeth loses control over her emotions and that's what led her to do it. And I know that sounds bad. But the emotion she loses control over isn't anger. It's grief. She's taking out her frustrations. She shouldn't have taken it out on percy. But she did. Because Rick wanted her to. I don't know exactly what he meant for the scene to be. But it's not what people have made it out to be. He definitely didn't mean for this scene, and all the other scenes that Annabeth haters cling onto, to be evidence that Annabeth is toxic and abusive. Because she's not.

I always thought percabeth would be a ship that no one would ever hate. But I'm seeing it happening, and frankly, I don't care that some people don't like the ship. The problem is that they find the need to bring down Annabeth to make it seem like the ship is toxic and abusive and the worst thing to ever exist. And that it's all somehow her fault.

I wish I could forget the time I read someone say, that 'Annabeth calling Percy 'seaweed brain' was her way of self validation because being around percy made her feel smart'. What does that even mean. Just because her fatal flaw is hubris, it doesn't mean that that's all she is. It's laughable how horribly some people have seemed to grasp Annabeth's character. They've made her into something she's not. And don't even get me started on people blaming her for all of Percy's insecurities. She didn't create them. She isn't encouraging them. Percy's insecurities are in his head. I'm pretty sure that's what insecurity means. Why is she at fault.

It hurts to see Annabeth, who is canonically a very well developed character with a lot of depth, being reduced to just her 'evil moments', that are almost always taken out of context. But meanwhile, I haven't heard a single complaint about Percy even though he's done and thought a lot of the same things as Annabeth. Somehow, when Percy does it, it's excusable. But when Annabeth does it, it's unforgivable. But sure, it's not misogyny. It's also not delusion.

[dammit-tazmuir]

A basic timeline if it helps:

(ALSO, if you haven't already, please also read the short stories The Mysterious Study of Doctor Sex and As Yet Unsent before Nona the Ninth!)

In the epilogue of GtN, Harrow wakes up in a hospital bed on the Erebos, the Emperor's flagship, and meets John. She begs him to undo her lyctorhood and "give me back the life of Gideon Nav" (she says the full name), but he says he can't. They talk and she agrees to follow him.

Three days later ("Epiparados" in HtN), Harrow instead has Ianthe help her lobotomize herself, sealing away all her memories of Gideon, so that her brain won't know what to keep absorbing and she won't eat any more of the soul than she already has. Several agreements are made about this between her and Ianthe, and we still aren't privy to all the details, but Harrow leaves her post-lobotomy self all those letters. This also results in her Lyctoral power, while still present, being greatly limited, and her not having a cavalier auto-pilot mode.

Because she can't simply erase memories of Gideon without knowing something's wrong, she instead replaces necessary memories with false ones. With her immense power and grief, she subconsciously pulls most of the ghosts of people who were involved at Canaan House (including Dulcie and Pro) into a river bubble, and they play out false memories like an improv stage play. Whenever Harrow is unconscious, the "play" resumes. This means all the false past stuff "didn't happen" physically in time, but was real within the River, involving real ghosts of real people.

Among the ghosts, both Babs and Colum are conspicuously absent, only implied to have something vaguely resembling them in their place at the beginning. Cytherea makes no kind of appearance. The characters who are still alive and also Palamedes (because his ghost is sheltered in his own bubble) also have basically constructs taking their place, and they die off first. Silas's real ghost seems to be there and to have figured out what's up, and he eventually "kills" the Corona construct and then exits the bubble by his own choosing into the River. Some of the other ghosts figure out what's going on faster than others, and when Abigail realizes she helps Jeannemary and Isaac move on to wait out in the River. The other ghosts stay til near the end.

-

It takes her many more weeks to recover after the lobotomy, but eventually she starts becoming coherent again. John visits her and shows her the not at all concerning reserves of resurrected humans he has, all of whom have been alive but in stasis for 10,000 years. For the first time, he's waking up a new wave of them to send to the Ninth House to help shore up their numbers and give them the ability to keep passing on their culture and such.

He also teaches her about Resurrection Beasts: the vengeful revenants of murdered planets. He says there were originally nine: they've killed five, and there are three more out there. Harrow notes the math doesn't check out but doesn't bother asking.

However, part of what Harrow did to herself was setting it up so that if anyone even tries to say Gideon's name to her, she will physically hear it as "Ortus." In the course of talking, John says "Ortus Nigenad will not have died for nothing", but what he actually says is "Gideon Nav"; Harrow just hears it wrong, and notices that his mouth doesn't move quite right when he "says" Ortus. She starts bleeding and eventually falls unconscious, establishing a trend of bleeding + maybe other complications any time things threaten to remind her of Gideon. Since she said Ortus in return, the last thing she hears is John wonderingly repeating it.

She also did not consider that there could be more than one person named Gideon, but that's the name of the Saint of Duty. In Chapter 1 of GtN, Gideon described how her mom's dead body floated down to the Ninth's surface in a parachute, dead on arrival, with a day old baby in a bio container. When the nuns finally wrangled her mom's ghost back by force, all they got out of her was screaming "Gideon! Gideon! Gideon!" three times before running. They assumed this was a mother desperate to protect her child, and that Gideon was the baby's name, so they called her Gideon.

In fact, her mom was Commander Wake, full name (yes really) Awake Remembrance of These Valiant Dead Kia Hua Ko Te Pai Snap Back to Reality Oops There Goes Gravity. She was a woman who roughly 25 years ago rose up as a demagogue among Blood of Eden— the rebel faction among non-House humans that actively tries fighting the Empire— and united and organized them more than they'd ever been before. And we'll come back to her but she was killed by the Saint of Duty, and was just screaming in anger at him.

-

Harrow and Ianthe are eventually taken through the River to the Mithraem, the space station that serves as an empire base of operation and the personal home of the First.

They meet Mercymorn the Saint of Joy, whose anatomical skills through sheer memorization are just batshit stupid (Augustine says the applications are too narrow, because one would only really need it to kill Lyctors); Augustine the Saint of Patience, who "was a spirit magician like the Mithraem was a box with some bones" (and who John says could submerge half a city into the River if he wanted); and "Ortus" the Saint of Duty, who fights more like a cavalier or an attack dog than a traditional necromancer but can rapidly drain thanergy from others' theorems.

Augustine and Mercy hate each other and at one point Harrow catches a confrontation in the hall where he warns her to "stop playing this dangerous game, the one you said you'd stop." This is later show to be in reference to her conspiring with Blood of Eden, something both of them did in the past, but Mercy was always the "face" while Augustine stayed more distant and eventually backed out. He's confronting her because he's afraid John will kill them both if they find out.

Duty tries to kill Harrow many times. (There's an interesting discrepancy that the first time he tried to do so was "10 months before the Emperor's murder", but it was a few days after arrival on the Mithraem, which itself was 9 months before. I personally have a theory time is physically a little broken but yeah. It is also, notably, not 100% clear who first tried to kill Harrow on the Erebos.) The attempts are later revealed to be kind of on John's orders, though the full order was to fix her OR kill her. Even to John, Lyctors are very difficult to read, so he could tell something was dangerously wrong but not what.

What exactly he was sensing is a little hard to say. Because Harrow is schizophrenic and has had hallucinations since she was pretty young, she straight up didn't notice she was also being haunted, likely by multiple sources. She is never sure if the visions she sees of The Body are at all real, though she wants to believe there's something to them. A common interpretation (though technically debatable) is that when Harrow entered the Tomb at age 10, a piece of Alecto's soul just kind of latched on and haunted her from there on. But also.

Harrow's sword, as in Gideon's two-hander, fucking hates her. As in it literally physically burns her to make direct contact, at least early on. This is later revealed to be because Commander Wake has been clinging to it as a revenant for nearly twenty fucking years. She was in the sword the whole time Gideon had it. What seems to have happened is she clung to something else(? her bones? Gideon herself?) first and then when Gideon was given a sword as a kid Wake latched onto that, but she's been there for so long. (This is also why Harrow even in GtN says she always hated Gideon's sword and felt like it was judging her.)

Then, in Chapter 11, which is only 7 sentences long in total, Harrow "sleepwalks" / is dragged to where Cytherea's body is laid out and wakes up having impaled the body with her sword. Wake's ghost is split, a part still haunting Harrow's mind in the River, a part having moved its physical anchor to Cytherea's body so she can puppet it. This is why the corpse starts moving.

Unbeknownst to possibly anyone alive (it's ambiguous if even G1deon ever found out), G1deon's cavalier (or so we're told but that's a whole extra theory) Pyrrha was never fully absorbed, compartmentalized like Harrow has done to Gideon, though theirs was by accident, "and he took more from me than got taken from you." Pyrrha fronts sometimes and G1deon just blacks out when she does. At one point, Harrow walks in on the Saint of Duty "kissing the corpse" but Duty doesn't turn around and orders in a voice very unlike himself for Harrow to leave and close the door. This is because it's actually Pyrrha visiting Wake; she doesn't turn around so Harrow can't see the eye change.

-

Harrow spends time bonding with John and being taught how to kill planets and also avoids many death attempts that make her a nervous wreck. Eventually she stays awake for six days to keep vigilance and hatches a plan to murder Duty with soup, but John won't let anyone kill each other in front of him, yikes. He forces Harrow to go get some rest and she starts sleeping in Ianthe's room for safety instead. Ianthe has been trying the whole time to play bad boy love interest but forgetting the part where the bad boy is actually nice to the girl, so she doesn't mind too much.

What she does mind is her stupid fucking replacement arm. It's not perfect so she can't bring herself to accept it no matter how much that's messing her up, and she's actively frustrated with herself. Harrow wakes up in a state of zen clarity after a very long rest to see Ianthe stabbing at her arm, because Augustine gave her a few days before he's giving up trying to teach her and she's having a breakdown. Harrow casually decides to remove the old arm and grow her a new one, which apparently counts as sex to Ianthe (I'm only like 10% joking), and Ianthe loves her new arm and is able to function as a full proper Lyctor. As thanks, Ianthe helps Harrow try to set up an opportunity to kill the Saint of Duty.

This involves going to Augustine, who sets up a fancy dinner party. He doesn't tell Mercy why they need to distract John, but promises to keep her BoE activity secret if she helps, and swears on his brother's sword, so she agrees. (Underappreciated bit: He also says he can make sure Duty leaves on cue, and "Trust me, when I want Ortus to go, he'll be giddy-gone." Narration follows "(This did not make sense to you, as a joke.)" But it's. "When I want Gideon to go, he'll be giddy-gone" lmao.) Augustine and Mercy get incredibly drunk and eventually start making out and then pull John into it: Dios Apate, Minor. As casual as everyone is later Harrow gets the sinking but distinct feeling this has happened before. (Because it has, at minimum in reference to Dios Apate, Major, and strongly implied they've just been a messy ass polycule for way longer.)

When Harrow goes looking for Duty during this distraction, though, she finds a trail of blood leading her to the incinerator, and Duty injured and trapped inside. She considers just leaving, even when Wake-possessing-Cytherea activates the incinerator, but "he" looks to her with (dark, but so is the room) helpless eyes and she's too much of a bleeding heart, so she pulls "him" out. It's actually Pyrrha at this point, and once she's out she keeps her eyes closed as she tells Harrow how to effectively ward herself; "You'll be safe from us." She then speaks out into the hall, to Wake, saying this is fine, Wake can kill her, but please just tell her, after all this time, back then, why did Wake bring the ba—

John and co arrive after hearing the incinerator alarms, cutting her off, but she was asking why Wake brought the baby, who Pyrrha firmly believed to be hers/G1deon's and has been mourning over for the past 20 years.

-

In the River bubble dreams, the plot has diverged significantly as "the Sleeper" haunts Canaan House, starts killing people, and the weather turns to shit and stays that way. The Sleeper (who Ortus grimly joked should really be called "the Waker") is in fact Commander Wake, wearing the orange hazmat suit she died in. Gideon's sword is seen in the coffin because it was her physical anchor for so long (or may still be one anchor).

-

Eventually Harrow kills another planet trying to prepare a perimeter to face the approaching RB, and runs into Camilla there, who is this far out looking for Harrow. Camilla examines her and says “Nice intercranial haemorrhage. Kills most of us non-Lyctors.” (In reference to the lobotomy.) Harrow doesn't remember her except as a faceless corpse, but Cam has Harrow examine a piece of Pal's skull to confirm that he's still a revenant, and she meets him in his River bubble, but accidentally brings Wake with her. After a short talk with Pal, who she also doesn't remember, Wake starts threatening to break his bubble and he makes her leave quickly, but asks which bone Camilla has so he knows where to focus his essence, and asks Harrow to remake it into something with mobility, so she turns it into a hand once she's out.

As Harrow leaves the bubble, though, feeling overwhelmed and mixed up, narration for the chapter ends: "But you were always too quick to mourn your own ignorance. You never could have guessed that he had seen me." For the first time, Gideon, who has been the first-person narrator the entire time, directly references herself. Prior to this, though, she did have a lot of parentheticals or other asides, and a running gag of harping on Harrow for not knowing what a pommel was. She's been able to hazily watch everything from Harrow's subconscious.

Outside, Harrow learns the Camilla is now traveling with Coronabeth and Judith, and that all of them are with BoE, though Judith (who is in bad shape) does not appear to be staying by choice and begs Harrow to warn the Emperor he has a traitor in his midst. Harrow does not end up warning anyone.

-

Everyone gets ready for the RB's arrival, and to fight the Heralds, which look like external creatures but are in fact extensions of the RB, like fingers on a hand.

At one point in this last stretch, Harrow sits and talks with John, and he makes the mistake of telling her she'd be a hell of a daughter and he sometimes indulges the wish that she'd been his. She breaks violently and throws herself down to confess that she opened the Tomb as a child, and asks if she killed two of her fathers that day. As far as John is aware, that shouldn't be possible, so he assumes there must have been other burial chambers added in all the outer parts of the Tomb and that one of those is what Harrow stumbled into. Harrow is on one hand betrayed and pissed that he doesn't believe her, and on the other now questioning if she hallucinated everything.

John tries to comfort and absolve her of further guilt, apologizing that she endured so much based on a misunderstanding. But as he tries to brush some hair out of her bleeding face, the act of touching her head makes him more able to see the immediate area and he gets much more serious as he suddenly asks, "Harrow, who the hell has been tampering with your temporal lobe?" and she panics and runs without fully understanding why. He calls after her but doesn't pursue and doesn't bring it up again later, but the last thing she hears is him cursing himself. "Dammit, John! Dammit!"

-

Eventually, the night comes, and where Chapter 39 has John telling everyone "ten minutes to breach", it chronologically goes into the Prologue. Ianthe comes in and begs Harrow to let her help undo what she's done, because she doesn't want Harrow to die here. "Just turn around" bc the Orpheus vibes weren't strong enough lol. But Harrow tells her to fuck off and Ianthe does.

"And you walked toward your death like a lover" (39) / "you went to make war on Hell." (Prologue) (With the noted time breaks here and the capitalization of Hell I have recently been alerted to a theory that Harrow was never trying to fight the RB, but straight up doing some offscreen shit in Hell, but we'll see in AtN I guess.)

Hell spat her back out because Mercymorn stabbed her and left her to get eaten, although she did disable her pain receptors and hadn't intended Harrow to wake up for it. Harrow was left too strong to die quickly and too weak to save herself.

As she blacked out, she started rapidly reinventing the scenarios of her false memories, and we got three chapters of AUs. First is Harrow Nova, where she was born a failed experiment without necromancy and instead became cavalier to an adopted necromantic heir (Gideon). Second is a royal ball where many Houses are sending heirs to try to court and win the favor of Her Divine Highness (Gideon, which is a wild thing for Harrow to subconsciously clock). And then the beloved Coffee Shop AU, where the BARI Star is of course Gideon. Each time, Abigail tells her again, "this isn't how it happens", and the last time "Absolutely not", because that time was threatening to pull the Fourths' ghosts back into things.

When Harrow "wakes up" in the normal River bubble, Abigail helps explain what's been going on, and Harrow remembers and cries for Gideon.

-

Outside, with Harrow's consciousness awol and the dam holding back her essence broken, Gideon wakes up fully in Harrow's body and takes over. She starts fighting Heralds and it's specified that she dies several times while doing so, she just keeps getting better. One Herald also bites off her thumb and she instantly regrows a new one, which is not normal for Lyctors; they'd normally heal whole sections lost as stumps, like Ianthe's arm.

Eventually she runs into Mercy, who sees her eyes and pieces shit together, but Wake shows up and shoots Mercy with a bullet made from Herald carcass and leaves. Gideon has weird feelings and then runs off to find Ianthe. Augustine finds them, sees Gideon's eyes, and runs off. Ianthe gives Gideon Harrow's letter for her, including her sunglasses.

Eventually, Gideon and Ianthe go to John's room, but find him interrogating Wake, so they hide in a coatrack/closet area near the door. The Augustine and Mercy show up to confront John. Then Duty shows up, and stops by the coat rack first, and looks dead at the baby Lyctors, and takes Gideon's sunglasses off her face to wear before ignoring them and moving on, because it's Pyrrha and she needed to hide her eyes from the others. Wake is immensely relieved to see Pyrrha, who immediately shoots her (freeing her ghost).

The worst episode of Maury ever plays out, and at first it seems like Gideon might have been Wake and G1deon's kid, but instead, it's that Augustine and Mercymorn twenty years ago seduced John to acquire a genetic sample. He very specifically tried to avoid any risk of that but Mercymorn's anatomy skills are stupid and Augustine providing extra distraction probably helped. Mercy initially set up several "dummies"/"dolls" using her own eggs, and Wake was intended to use vat womb technology to grow at least one of those into a baby to sacrifice, but "THE EGGS YOU GAVE ME ALL DIED AND YOU LIED TO ME, SO I DID THE IMPLANTATION MYSELF." (This means Gideon is a sort of immaculate conception in that her parents never even directly met in life, but it also involves no less than six different people having sex lmao.)

Their intention was to use blood of a close enough genetic match to John's to break his blood ward on the Locked Tomb to wake Alecto and try to kill him and end the empire. The original plan was to evacuate the citizens of the Houses, too. This is also how Harrow finally got into the Tomb as a kid; "my face was under your fucking fingernails." (This fight and detail was also mentioned in GtN.) This comic by Naomistares beautifully illustrates the explanation.

John appears to have not quite pieced together everything and be pretty shocked. He knew there was something up and playing dumb, but when the seduction part comes into play he gets more thrown off, and then accuses "Did you two just pretend to hate each other?" (Extrapolation: The implications of Dios Apate Minor and Major both— and the fact that Major took them 500 years to successfully plan and pull off, and Minor was the first time they've been with him since— seem to be that neither of them alone could have pulled it off, because the only thing John wanted badly enough to let his guard down was both of them. This is supported by the first time Mercy mentions Augustine near the beginning, he immediately drops his argument and his face lights like a sunrise at the idea they're talking again, to her immense frustration. So when he learns about the conspiracy he is fully willing to believe they just put on an elaborate act all this time to make him more desperate, smh.)

Gideon of course is also very overwhelmed by this revelation, and comes out of hiding to announce, "I'm— I'm not fucking dead!" And of course John looks her over and replies as his first words to her, "Hi, not fucking dead. I'm dad."

This whole confrontation was because when Mercymorn and Augustine each saw Gideon's eyes, they recognized them as Alecto's eyes, Alecto being The Body, A.L., Annabel Lee, the woman buried in the Tomb. But there was no way a random child of the Ninth would have Alecto's DNA, and there was absolutely a way John's DNA would end up on the Ninth, because they worked very hard to put it there. They come to the conclusion that Alecto wasn't just John's bodyguard, as he'd always told them, but his cavalier, and their eyes swapped because he'd done Lyctorhood a better way than everyone else did, letting Alecto survive. (This leaves a lot of unanswered questions, not least of which being why the fuck would Alecto's eyes look like John's now do, and there's reason to suspect that the Lyctor's may have ultimately used the wrong formula but still got the right answer re: Gideon being John's kid, but that's a topic for after NtN.)

They had already been plotting to kill him, but this revelation makes them think that he just casually let them kill and eat their cavaliers with full knowledge there was another way, and that's their tipping point to go from secret plotting to openly "fuck you." (The "we might all die tonight anyway from this RB" might also be a factor.)

-

Back in the River bubble, everyone confronts Wake as the Sleeper, and Abigail and Ortus are able to summon the ghost of Ortus's historical blorbo Matthias Nonius to fight Wake using Ortus's sheer passion as a revenant link. (Ortus brought fanfiction to a magic undead gun fight and won, and we love him for it.) When Harrow sees Wake's face up close, she knows she's never seen her before, but something really bothers her, especially in the jaw (basically identical to Gideon, and they look very alike in general) and the eyes and brows (the most different from Gideon; this isn't said until NtN but it's very offhand, those features she got from John). This very subtly implies that the Divine Highness AU had been inspired by Harrow subsconsciously clocking the slight resemblance between Gideon and John.

Once Wake is gone, the bubble starts collapsing. Ortus, Matthias, and the other soldiers head off to help against the RB. Magnus and Abigail urge Harrow to return to her body, and believe she's just clinging to Gideon's memory and needs to let her go. Harrow begrudingly agrees, but Abigail and Magnus head out into the River (to look for Jeannemary and Isaac and maybe others, and then try to cross it, which Abigail theorizes can be done but people simply don't anymore because they've been taught to wait for a Second Resurrection and most have waited so long they've gone mad). The real Dulcie stays, though, and tells Harrow she has something to tell her.

-

With the confrontation, Mercymorn eventually tells John she'll forgive him if he can look her in the eye and swear to her he loved Cristabel and never wanted harm to come to her. Instead, as she walks into his arms, she slides her hands inside his body and turns him into mist. This does kill him, and there's a solar flare as the sun starts to destabilize, but he Gets Better and kills her instead. He gives everyone an ultimatum to join him or die. Not Gideon though, they just met, yikes, besides that's Harrow's body and he'd rather not punish Harrow too, Gideon can just be rebellious in the John corner it's fine. But finally Augustine asks if he gets a choice, and John says yes and begs him to come back, and Augustine tells him no and then submerges the entire Mithraem to the bottom of the River, near one of the stoma openings. Augustine basically asked if he got a choice just to set up to tell him to go to hell and then physically drag him directly there.

(On the note of literally yes dying but then getting better, this is how Gideon died several times earlier fighting Heralds, and also why she "survived" the nerve gas as a baby. And after the Avulsion Trial in GtN: "'Ha-ha,' said Gideon, 'first time you didn't call me Griddle,' and died. / *** / Well, passed out, but it felt a hell of a lot like dying. Waking up had an air of resurrection"... 😌)

John and Augustine end up wrestling over the stoma, with Ianthe above them. Pyrrha introduces herself properly to Gideon and informs her G1deon just died fighting the RB tonight, so she's alone in the body now. They debate what to do but ultimately end up out in the River too. Gideon thinks to herself that Ianthe could probably help make sure John is swallowed by the stoma but Augustine survives, but instead Ianthe does the opposite. (And. You know. Based on everything Ianthe knows, John dying has a high chance of meaning Corona dying too, along with the rest of the House citizens including the rest of her family, so there's that.)

Gideon finds herself passing out in the water, and then the last thing she sees is Harrow's bullshit dead girlfriend coming to claim her, as Alecto(?) says "in the wrong voice twice removed" something about chest compressions and not losing her. Gideon dies. (Again. But will it stick this time...?)

-

We cut back to Harrow in the River as Dulcie tells her she's certain she can sense someone intentionally moving Harrow's body, meaning there's a high chance Gideon is alive and in control. Dulcie appears to be crushed by falling debris afterward, but had been fully accepting of that risk in interest of the truth here.

Harrow chooses to pull herself out of the River not to her body, but into the Tomb. Nothing about the scene makes sense and it's not supposed to. She crawls into the empty(??) coffin and curls up with her sword and Frontline Titties of the Fifth, then she falls asleep, or dies, or both.

-

Six months later, we follow a girl about her daily life in a city that looks much closer to a modern day settlement than anything we'd seen thus far, albeit a dangerous and wartorn one. She lives with the person who goes to work for her, the person who teaches her, and the person who cares for her. She heals unnaturally quickly and for some reason when other people start to notice that they avoid those people after that. At the end she asks the person who cares for her if she's figured out who she is yet, and Camilla answers, "Not yet."

=============================================

BUT YEAH. I'm happy to answer specific questions if you have them as well. It's my favorite book and VERY worth a reread, but this should be enough to understand what's going on enough to be more confident moving into Nona. (Unsure if you actually meant to reread or were being hyperbolic, but clearing up confusion can't hurt either way!) And then once you finish all three books and all three short stories, you can read ALL of them again together and unlock all the layers of bonus content. >:3

(That is, I encourage reading NtN before rereading HtN unless you wanna reread HtN multiple times, because the added context from NtN and even from a later reread of GtN will enrich the HtN reread all the more.)

Good luck!

I finished Harrow the Ninth so now I need to reread Harrow the Ninth so maybe I will know what happened in Harrow the Ninth

[laursdomain]

you look perfect tonight

pairing: bodhi durran x marked!fem!reader

genre: fluff

synopsis: Days after Bodhi’s breakdown from Carr’s comment, all you want to do is show Bodhi how much you love him. A simple act of gift-giving turns into whispered confessions of your adoration for him, telling him how perfect he is. It isn’t until he begins to believe your words that you relent, adoring the way you can change his perspective of himself.

warnings: tooth rotting fluff, reader affirms bodhi, reader and bodhi are in love, established relationship, takes place during FW

w/c: 1.8k

a/n: part 2 of don't let it break you down; song ➳ perfect by ed sheeran; this is my formal apology for day 2 & 3; day 4: perfect for bodhi week! @empyreanevents

@siobhanbooks thank you for helping me with the tyrrish nicknames <3

ྀིb.d week masterlist

¸.♡.¸

It’s been a couple days since Bodhi had an emotional breakdown from what happened in Carr’s classroom. Aside from you, nobody really knew what had actually happened. Imogen had questioned Bodhi afterwards, who brushed it off saying he was nearing burnout. The question was whether or not she believed him, but she didn’t speak a word about it afterwards. She typically voiced her concerns about something to Xaden, not to be a tattletail, but because she cared about Bodhi. What your boyfriend didn’t know was that you begged the pink-haired girl to not speak a word about it to anyone. She agreed, but you unfortunately owed her. It was worth it for Bodhi.

Nobody knew. More importantly, Xaden didn’t know. 

i found a love for me

Bodhi seemed fine now, but you always enjoyed going above and beyond for him. He always did the little things for you, and you wanted to reciprocate that. You wait for him in your shared room, fiddling with the gift you made him inside the pocket of your flight jacket. Like clockwork, Bodhi enters the room, hair messy from flying atop of Cuir. He lights up at the sight of you, warming your heart.

“Hi, a thaisce” He speaks, tone indicating he was in a good mood.

“Hi, how was flight maneuvers?” You stand, wrapping your arms around his neck. You reach up, balancing on your toes as you plant a soft and loving kiss on his lips.

He smiles into the kiss, pouting after you pull away. “Boring, it was mostly me showing things to the first years.”

As always, you get lost in his eyes, loving how perfect they were. You can’t help but think about the things that made him so lovable, so perfect, so him. He notices how lost you are in your thoughts, but lets you stay like that as he rests his forehead against yours, enjoying your presence. 

oh, i never knew you were the someone waitin' for me

You mentally note everything about him that you love, smiling to yourself.

Bodhi’s eyes were the warmest and most perfect shade of brown. Xaden’s were onyx, and according to Violet, they had golden flecks. You’d choose Bodhi’s swirling chocolate eyes over Xaden’s onyx ones.

Xaden was very tall, while Bodhi was a couple inches shorter–making the height difference between you two perfect. Not too large of a gap, but not too small. Just perfect. 

The way he easily lights up when he sees someone he cares about–either it be you, Imogen, or even Xaden always makes your heart warm. On the other hand, Xaden acts like he is going to murder everyone. 

Bodhi was always kind to everyone, even if they didn’t reciprocate it. Xaden always was snappy and cold to everyone, only reserving warmth for Violet.

Bodhi always found ways to show he cares–either it be through acts of service, or merely his presence. As for Xaden–unless you were Violet Sorrengail, don’t expect much. 

Bodhi never flaunted around how amazing he was at his signet, or riding, or sparring. Though, if someone ever tried to challenge him, he’s instantly shutting them down within the first minute. 

You always loved tracing his dragon relic on the bottom of his back, admiring how his muscles flex against Cuir’s green.

He always looked so naturally perfect atop of Cuir, the two fitting together like two puzzle pieces.

“What are you thinking about, pretty girl?” Bodhi murmurs, pulling you out of your thoughts. 

You smile sweetly, “about the things I love about you.”

A light pink dusts his cheeks, not trying to hide it around you. He never hides around you, that’s how much he trusts and loves you. “I love you too. Penny for your thoughts?”

You pretend to think, though you know you’re going to tell him. “I love all your perfections”

“Surely that’s not a long list,” he jokes, though he’s truthful with his words.

You lightly slap him, scolding him. “It’s actually quite a lengthy list.” He raises a brow at you, urging you to continue. On any other day, you would’ve held out longer, making him earn your words. But you know that he needs to hear it, especially in light of the accident that occurred a couple days ago.

i found a love to carry more than just my secrets

“Let’s see,” you begin, noticing how he watches you with adoration. “I love the color of your eyes, they remind me of my favorite sweet–chocolate.” Your hands reach for his face, thumbs brushing under his eyes. He chuckles, knowing how you force him to sneak into the kitchens to get you chocolate after curfew nearly every night.

“We have the perfect height difference, not too large–but I can still reach up a little to get to you. And on our wedding day I can wear heels,” you hum out, reaching on your toes to prove your point.

“Wedding? You’re in a rush,” he teases, caressing his thumbs against your waist.

“Shut up, you brought it up first.” You lightly scold, recalling the conversation you two had two weeks ago before you fell asleep. He doesn’t say anything, waiting for you to continue. “Let’s see…I love your hair, it’s perfect for me to play with.”

“I think you love my hair more than me,” he jokes, nuzzling his head closer to you once you reach your fingers up, tangling a couple of his curls in your fingers.

“I love how humble and kind you are, it makes everyone love you even more.” You look into his eyes, watching them crinkle as he smiles. He knows you’re right, he was the most approachable out of the marked ones. Typically, cadets went to him rather than Garrick or Xaden. And Bodhi had the most friends out of the three. Even though Xaden claims he ‘doesn’t do friends.’

“I love your dragon relic, Cuir placed it in the most perfect place. Plus, it looks perfect against your skin.” Your left hand leaves its spot resting against his chest, trailing down to his lower back, flattening it against his flight jacket, directing atop of Cuir’s relic.

“I admire the way you always strive to do the best, setting the bar to motivate everyone else, not putting them down. You always motivate me, particularly. You have the gauntlet patch for a reason,” your hand reaches to the array of patches on his jacket, lightly pressing one finger against his gauntlet patch.

You open your mouth to continue, but Bodhi beats you to it. “Okay I get it, you can stop now.” The flustered look on his face is adorable, loving the way he reacts to you. You giggle, wrapping your arms back around his neck again. He smiles at the sound of your giggles, unable to keep them under control. He could listen to the sound of your laugh and voice all day long if you’d let him.

oh, darling, just kiss me slow, your heart is all i own

He places a chaste kiss against your lips, pushing all his love into the kiss. You smile, chasing his lips momentarily afterwards. You nearly forget the entire purpose of waiting for him, forcing yourself to wait before kissing him again. “I have something for you.”

“Is it you?” Bodhi smirks, lightly tickling your sides. He places a kiss on the corner of your lips, doing it to the other side as well before you speak again.

You ignore the heat rising in your cheeks, lightly slapping his bicep. “Not this time.”

He chuckles, “what is it, a thaisce?” You always loved the way he spoke Tyrrish to you, specifically in his nicknames for you. You added that to your list.

You remove one of your hands from his neck, pushing the arm that was blocking your pocket out of the way as you stuff your hand inside, fingers looping around the gift. “Close your eyes.”

He playfully rolls his eyes, smiling at your antics. He listens, closing his eyes as he waits. You remove your hand, revealing the woven bracelet you had made for him, placing your open palm between your bodies. “You can open them, mo ghrá dhil.” 

Bodhi opens his eyes, meeting your gaze first, as always. His gaze filters down, landing on your outstretched palm as an even wider smile overtakes his features. One of his arms leaves your waist, gingerly taking the dark brown bracelet, “you made this for me?”

“Mhm,” you confirm, sinking your teeth into your bottom lip to contain your giddiness. “Quinn taught me how to wove it for you. It took me too many tries, but I wanted it to be perfect, just like you.” 

i don't deserve this, darling, you look perfect tonight

Bodhi’s eyes snap to yours, and you can see his eyes glossy, emotion swirling within. You knew it wasn’t out of sadness, it was out of happiness. You could make out love and adoration gleaning in his eyes, along with another emotion you couldn’t quite name. Out of instinct, you caress your thumbs under his eyes again, silently telling him to not cry at the gift.

You had an inkling Bodhi would get a little emotional at the sight of your gift. He was constantly making and doing things for others, using his skilled craftsmanship to his advantage. Something his late father bestowed down to him. He always did things for others, but nobody ever did anything for him. That changes today. 

He pulls you in for one of his Bodhi hugs, wrapping you up in his arms. “I love it, thank you.” You linger in his arms, enjoying the comfort you constantly feel from his hugs. He always gave the best hugs. 

“I made matching ones,” you confess. When he pulls away with his brows furrowed, you maneuver yourself to pull up your left sleeve, revealing a nearly identical bracelet against your relic-clad wrist. You put most of your energy into his, wanting Bodhi’s to be as perfect as possible. You didn’t do the same for yours, but they were practically identical–as long as you didn’t squint. 

Bodhi slides his bracelet onto his left wrist as well, “they’re perfect.” To prove his point, he extends his wrist so your bracelets were side-by-side, showing how perfect they looked together. Just like you two.

“I know they aren’t as good as Quinn’s weaving, but I really wanted to do something for you, and I’m not a natural like–” You are swiftly cut off by Bodhi’s warm lips on yours, easily shutting you up. You giggle into the kiss, cupping his jaw in your hands. He tilts his head, deepening the kiss before pulling away. You sigh out in content, knowing your lips were surely swollen by now, just like his. You’d be content with the state of the world as long as you were with Bodhi.

an angel in person, and he looks perfect

“They’re perfect, a thaisce.” 

“You’re perfect, mo ghrá dhil.”  You respond, watching the way he slightly nods, believing your statement. 

You still had two classes, but Bodhi didn’t let you leave his arms for the rest of the day, not caring what repercussions Xaden had planned for you. You didn’t mind, though. You’d deal with any punishment for Bodhi, because that is how deep your love ran for him. 

To you, Bodhi Durran is the most perfect being in the universe.

¸.♡.¸

[chongoblog]

Any fun facts about where you decided to put certain mashups in Polka For Another Purgatory?

Sure! In fact I'm just gonna dump all kinds of fun facts about this one:

Here's the mashup itself

FUN FACTS

-Greetings was chosen as the first song for obvious reasons

-Any mashups that use the original song are used for that reason. This includes Destinytrousle, Misery Maker, Semi-Charmed Remix (and technically Take Control right after), Yes Capes, Dear God Do We Live In A Society, Computery Punk, Rocket-Propelled Grenade, Kraken Dance Party, Once In A Lysate Cell, and Ultimate Science Guy.

-Airman no Taosenai with Timber is a reference to NOW That’s What I Call Mashup where I use the polka instrumental of Timber with the acapella of Timber. This transitions to Up N Down, my only other mashup that used Timber

-Smashup was always planned to be during Nintendo Power, because of course. I went with Kerfuffle over Smashup because A) It comes directly after Crimson and B) I'd made it a point to not repeat any songs throughout this mashup

-Another fun CPU Kerfuffle in-joke is Crimson specifically being interrupted by Larry, which is both a reference to how streams start up for CPUK past 20, but also to both Larry and Crimson's situation at the time CPUK left off

-The only sample that appears in two songs is "Shelter". I associate that song with my boyfriend, Sen (who is moving in this week AAAAAAAAAA), so its level of importance has been reflected in this way.

-Speaking of, ending the song with the bloop from Deadlock was Sen's idea, which makes perfect sense, since the song was meant to be a celebration of me (and Deadlock is my baby) and also a cheer of defeating the creative block of the last few months (which is what Deadlock is about).

-Destinytrousle's part has We Are Number One in it both as a fun little shoutout to the We Are Number One Edits I used to make in college (this one's my favorite) AND as a reference to the fact that the original Destinytrousle mashup was going to have We Are Number One included, but when I showed the draft to a friend, they let me know that the We Are Number One x Bonetrousle mashup was ground well-covered already. I'm glad that they told me that, but I wanted to make it real here anyway.

-The sole purpose for choosing Undying Kermitment on Movin Right Along's part is because Frog is a Frog, just like Kermit. I reinforce this idea by playing the Crazy Frog sample.

-In case you haven't heard the original Polka For Another Day (which you should listen to if you haven't, it's a work of art!), I copy the Usher => CaptainSparklez fakeout directly from that. In fact, Polka For Another Day was a big inspiration for originally doing the fakeout in Yes, Capes!

-Similarly, I wouldn't have made Once In A Lysate Cell without Polka For Another Day. I'd never actually heard Stan before, and I really loved the hook when I first heard it in PFAD. With it lodged in my head, when I first heard the RoR2 track, my brain superimposed the lyrics

-2 songs in this medley will be in the upcoming themed album I've been hyping up for a while.

-In N Out on So No Chi No Sadame came from putting the "Outside" line on the opening section and putting the layered hurried section over the more chaotic instrumental following it. I admit I could have done better since Eminem is kinda left hanging, but hey.

-The segments that I chose for Transcendental Fever Dream were based on my two favorite parts of the mashup: The Rickroll => God dammit and the crazy edit on the Cha Cha Slide.

-This much is probably obvious, but Back 3 Back was on DJ Professor K because of Naganuma. I also accidentally labelled it wrong in the video. Oops!

-The Weird Al segment is meant to replicate the endings of my polka videos where all of the songs are all played in one short section. I decided to represent this with one song from each of the polkas I've covered thus far. This DOES include Bohemian Polka, although I didn't show video of it because I thought it'd clash with how short everyone's video already was. A lot of the song choices were deliberate in the sense that it fit the tone of "Beat It" best, but some were intentionally chosen because of their relevance (to me at least) in the polka medlies. For instance, "Hate to Say I Told You So" is my favorite sample from Angry White Boy Polka, I had the most fun adding the bit for "Pump Up the Jam" into Hooked. And I can't go a DAY without someone commenting about Vivziepop animating for Polkamania.

-Mad Rat Purgatory goes with Jazz Cats only because of the Rats/Mice that accompany them.

Hope you enjoy the insight!!

[daisybell-on-a-carousel]

Hi! Yes! Jason was originally the one who dyed his hair- and it was his own choice to do it in order to look like Robin to help Bruce with the Joker. I am in the firm belief however that it wasn't something he naturally wanted to continue

I will note a difference that in pre-crisis people do not think Dickbin is dead, and very much DO think Jason is the original Robin. Jason being seen as Dick is wayyy less common post so people thinking he's the same is less touched on- but still has its remnants there- most noticeably in an info page from Annual #13 which outright states this. But no presumed death and Bruce still latched onto this

I have a whole post I plan on.. eventually. making with focus on how Bruce forced Jason to be a copy so I'm a bit invested in this haha. But also it's not made yet so this is my messy thoughts

You say Jason is later upset as he won't build his own reputation- and that very panel is actually a major point for me!

It's phrased as seeking glory- ego gratification. But as Bruce repeats in this comic, and my issue with it and him, is that Bruce is comparing Jason's issues to Batman being known as Bruce Wayne, Dick Grayson being known as Robin. Which is different from Jason being a Robin that is VERY much assumed by all to be the original. Jason lacks his own identity even as a hero, to the greater public he is the same Robin as ever, to the closer public well if Batman doesn't mention the difference why should they, to fellow heros it's an opening to compare him.

Also these panels are like- immediately after he gleefully accepts Robin- so it's not that much later

Jason accepts Bruce's explanation, and goes back out with Bruce as Robin. Batman smiles. Jason does not

Bruce is happy to have a Robin, Jason is living a dreaded scenario. Everyone thinks he is the original Robin and this is not dissuaded or corrected. Robin feels less like the mantle that it becomes and more.. Jason simply IS Robin

Bruce DOES initially react negativity to Jaybin- Dick is still an open wound, Robin belongs to Dick- Bruce mistook Jason for Dick. It wasn't a pretty combination. But that's when the floodgates sorta.. open for Bruce. Because now Jason looks like Dick, and Bruce misses Dick so much. As soon as Jason is granted permission for the suit- Batman practically jumps on it, and gives that bullshit ego gratification speech as soon as Dick is gone

As well, after he dyed his hair for the Robin stunt, Bruce would accidentally call Jason Robin, and Jason hated this. But, and my phone is at like 10% so I can't really double check though several comics right not, it felt like vigilantism became much more open for Jason after he dyed his hair, he got to do more, something he was always clawing for

Jason does choose to become Robin, but it always felt.. pressured to me. There's the fact Robin was a gift from Dick- someone who Jason looks up to. There's the fact Bruce is happy about Jason being Robin once he's officially out on the streets, that he has no regrets, There's the fact Bruce was already calling Jason "Robin" anyway. There's the fact that as soon as Jason had the costume on Bruce immediately guilted him into thinking he's selfish and not seeking proper justice for not wanting to just be seen as just Robin

Jason DOES choose Robin, he holds onto it so hard it hurts, but he didn't.. want it so to say. He won't let it go, he accepts it. But Jason goes from such a turn from how he originally felt on the situation, and seeing as above. I can simply only seeing it as Bruce forcing this- maybe not directly, but still, Jason is Robin now.

Jason can't make any changes to the costume, at the very least he feels he can't.

Jason can't have his own name. The invitation over having his own identity is directly over an admonishment for not being focused on the cause on helping others

Jason's closest friend in pre-crisis is Harvey Bullock, a friendship that started soon after Harvey noticed and acknowledged Jason as a different Robin. Nocturna views Robin as him, not as an extension of Dick. Rena and Eddie I don't have much info on rn without double checking. But please at least note the theme here

In the Titans crossovers Jason has to point out Donna is seeing him as Dick- and he doesn't want that

Jason is allowed no way to be differentiated as Robin. It BOTHERS him, he DOESN'T like it and he continues to not like being compared to or mistaken for Dick- but he by some metric HAS to keep up the exact suit and style and hair color

(DO tell me if I missed any of your points or you want more clarification on an aspect!!!!!! I'm kinda disconnectedly rambling and my phone continues to die rushing me. So I wouldn't doubt if I missed something or said something confusing because I rly can't double check this rn)

I cannot stress enough that Bruce did make Jason dye his hair like that IS a thing it wasn't completely out of left field made up by Morrison. I love complaining about Morrison's Jason but that aspect is literally from precrisis as many details about that Jason are

No, there is not an explicit panel of Bruce going "well hey you have to have black hair to be my son, fuck you". But the whole thing is that Jason is not allowed to have his own hero identity and that the general public and villians arent supposed to know there's a new Robin, which, pretty heavily implies he's meant to look like Dick as Robin. If Jason isn't allowed to give the costume pants (or at least, made to feel like he can't change that aspect), then yeah, he's gonna have to keep up dying his hair too

[causticsodaa]

Thank you so much for the lovely message @kayharts! Sakura and Suo are one of my fave duos in WBK as well, and there’s a lot that can be said about these two! I’m happy that my posts were able to provide the insight you needed.

To answer your question, this is actually something I’ve actually been meaning to make a writeup about, so your ask prompted me to actually make a post for it lol. But without further ado:

Sakura’s perspective of Suo

To start off, I’d like to say that Sakura hasn’t exactly regarded Suo on an individual level. He considers him as a part of his community alongside his other peers.

Sakura doesn’t have any of his internal dialogue that directly acknowledges Suo (as he did for Endo) or ‘impactful’ memories of him (like with Umemiya and Nirei) that shapes his development outside of Suo’s advice.

The only exception is this scene in Chapter 145, in which Sakura’s view on Suo is quite… convoluted, to say the least.

The reason why Sakura thinks that Suo is “full of crap” is because of how he constantly lies to mess with Sakura specifically (though Sakura hasn’t picked up on this). And yet, Sakura still believes every word Suo says…

This even bleeds into how Sakura addresses to Suo’s direct praise with apprehensiveness (though he does blush more at the words; you aren’t slick Sakura).

Coupled with the incessant teasing and the way Suo had treated Kanuma in Shishitoren, it’s no wonder why Sakura generalizes him as someone who “teases everyone at every chance he gets”. This isn’t remotely true; though Suo does tend to poke fun at others, his main victim is Sakura himself.

But then again, that scene in particular is just Sakura over-generalizing his classmates (you can tell that Sakura and Kiryu were not that close back then because his opinion on him is the only one that’s remotely positive) in order to juxtapose the fact that he believes that his peers are genuinely good people in the next page. Because despite the misconstrued perceptions Sakura has on their “flaws”, he still wants to protect and live alongside the people he cares about.

Additionally, I would like to tack on a big yet to the first two statements of this post. Wind Breaker’s (and Sakura’s, to that extent) story is far from over, and there is much potential for how his and Suo’s relationship can develop further [between a protagonist and deurotagonist]. For now, I’ll focus on what has been established in canon.

Circling back to Shishitoren, we see that Sakura says Suo has a rotten personality. In fact, he is the only one who openly criticizes Suo’s treatment.

Despite this, he doesn’t seem to harbor much resentment towards Suo. In fact, one can argue that Sakura is more so curious, given the fact he had the initiative to ask Nirei more about him (when he hadn’t done so for the other Furin students). Sakura also wanted to fight Suo despite the latter not provoking him, and Sakura not actively applying Umemiya’s advice (of fights being a conversation) at that point of the story.

Sakura is also shown (and not told) to trust Suo wholeheartedly.

Before Noroshi, Sakura lets his vice captain come up with a strategy, relying on him to do something he has no expertise in. Despite Sakura’s embarrassment, he’s come a long way from being so afraid to ask for help from others before.

Sakura also reluctantly agrees to work with Sugishita despite their animosity, because it was Suo’s idea.

Suo also points out his Achille’s heel while fighting. Despite Sakura’s initial apprehensiveness, he chooses to believe in Suo in the end.

Following Suo’s advice works out in Sakura’s favor when he fought alongside Sugishita, and even his fights after Noroshi.

There’s also this scene in Roppo where Sakura imitates one of Kanji’s moves; he uses Suo’s shoulder to support himself (when he can jump to that kind of height by himself easily) and kick at Endo’s face.

As for what you said in regards of Sakura knowing whether Suo is hiding something deeper or not, nothing has been explicitly confirmed as now. Until we get something [meaningful] from Sakura that directly addressees Suo as a character, we won’t really know. In any case, Sakura would most likely respect Suo’s boundaries and not pry into his business (especially if Suo’s advice to Sakura stems from shared experiences).

I can definitely see where your speculation is coming from, though. It’s inevitable at this point; I’m 99% sure that Sakura’s request to fight Suo in Shishitoren (and Suo’s declaration to do his best) foreshadows a future fight between them. Given how closed off the two are as you said, it would be the only way they can understand each other.

[istharoth]

Little Light wc: 1.3 | fem-reader | not proof-read | angst There are a few weeks left before the Inspector becomes the anomaly. Should Sho confess now or should he let these emotions rest? AN: I'M ALIVE.

Missions with Vagastrom are never easy; at least that’s what Y/N thinks. Alan Mido, the Captain, is doable–she thinks he’s like a doberman, but if she were to mention it to anyone, specifically Leo Kurosagi, the Vice Captain, he’ll never let her live in down. She can see the near future: him twisting her statement so that it could benefit him. She doesn’t hate Leo–hate a strong word–she dislikes him. 

Perhaps she only feels some affection for him because of who he hangs around–Shohei Haizono. A normal guy. 

Is there another way to describe the chef-ghoul-athletic smartass (affectionate)? She doubts there is. Speaking of the mission, it was as per usual–find the anomaly that put an object or person under a curse, hope to find clues about her own curse and bring back said anomaly to Darkwick Academy. 

“Y/N,” Mido calls from all the way from the vending machine, pointing at it, as if asking if she needed anything. 

‘More time to not become an anomaly please,’ But she can’t say that to Mido. She has maybe three weeks before she's captured by Darkwick and put into a prison for becoming the Kyklos. Y/N had considered asking Rui Mizuki -bearer of the killing curse- to kill her, but alas, she loves him too much to turn him into a murderer. 

"I'm okay, thanks." She answers, walking towards the tall, well-built captain. The autumn breeze sways, bringing along dried leaves in their wake. She crouches next to Mido, looking at the endless options offered by the vending machines. 

Maybe she should get something? "What are you getting?" He mirrors her position, eyes strangely hardening at the choice of choosing something. Knowing Mido, he'd get something for the first year ghouls too. Leo likes anything spicy as for Sho... she doesn't know. 

Despite knowing each other for a while, they aren't close. Y/N wouldn't consider her to be as close to Sho as she was with Rui or the Chaos Combo. Sho is just a junior she's come to adore—be it his passion for cooking or his appearance. 

She glances at the first year combo waiting for them just outside the convenience store; she raises her hand, grinning as she waves at the duo. Sho's eyes linger on her, as she turns away to face Mido again; they're talking about something but he isn't curious in the slightest. 

She’s been bright, akin to the summer sun that pierces anything, that illuminates the world, even those hidden in corners of the world. 

Leo from beside him, glances at his long-time friend and then at the senior who was turning into a plant anomaly. Shohei Haizono is, well, a playboy. He's been throughout junior high and high school, but seemingly that came at a pause ever since he met her. 

The way he looks at her: enraptured, whole. His gaze lingered on her; even as she plucks the loose feather off her hair and flicks it back to the ground, his gaze remains. Almost as his terrified of losing her even for a moment. As if he's falling into a hole he shouldn't fall into.

"It's not worth it." Leo mutters, turning around, pocketing his hands into his pant pockets. Honestly, he doesn't know what Sho sees in that NPC. She's average in every way: appearance, intelligence, strength. 

Yet, she keeps the ghouls wrapped around her finger, specifically Sho Haizono. 

Leo glances at her one last time. When she becomes the anomaly, someone will have to kill her and it won't be him or Sho. 

Night had fallen, and the quartet hiked into the forests to find an anomaly. They'd already discussed positions—Leo and Mido would do the actual capturing and if the anomaly had escaped, Sho and she would attempt to capture it. 

Simple enough, says Leo, before he casually strides into the deep forest with Mido.

"You'd think they'd know not to make me team up with you," Y/N idly states, tapping her foot. 

Sho looks at her, and then back at the forest—he can't look at her. If he does, he can't tear his gaze away and this mission would only take longer if Leo and Mido fail in capturing the anomaly. 

"What do you mean?" 

She spares him a glance and returns to keeping watch for the anomaly. "It doesn't work very well on you, does it?" She pauses for a moment, looking back at him. "My power, I mean." 

... Ah. He was certain she'd realized it was a ploy by Leo and himself to get her killed but, no. There's no reason she doesn't know about it. 

"Want an apology?" He scoffs, and she only chuckles, shaking her head. 

"No need. He said you had nothing to do with it and," she sighs, crossing her arms. "It was an order, wasn't it?" Right—'course she'd notice. Of course, she'd know Hyde had spies around campus, one of them being his younger brother. 

She doesn't have long to live as a human. Sho knows this and yet... and yet--"I'm sorry." He can let the anomaly escape; they can always find it afterwards, but he can't lose this. He doesn't want to lose her. 

"What for?" She blinks owlishly, hand twitching slightly, always a sign she was nervous. Before she harnessed the power of the ring, before she took her academic and physical exams, her right hand had always twitched. 

Sho knows he's making the wrong choice, but truly, he wants to relay this to her. Perhaps so she can feel burdened by these words, so that she'd remember him as she loses her mind in that prison. 

"For liking you." Like feels too weak of a word, but he can't say love. He won't say he took one look at and knew what love felt like because that wasn't it. Sho didn't decide one day he was in love with a human turning into an anomaly—he only recalls them together in the dead of the night at Mystery Diner, trying to recreate dishes the anomalies had. 

And perhaps it was then. It had to then—when she. When she did every single little thing, and in his mind, he knew he was screwed. It was love, yes, but he can't bring himself to say it.

And to the Honor Student, to the Inspector, love was unfathomable. She wouldn't digest it, would never accept it. He's unfortunately seen one too many people profess their love to her only for her to deny them. 

"Sorry." She quickly apologises. 

"Don't." Sho chuckles dryly, strangely feeling more at ease than he did before. "You won't accept it because of your fate, yeah?" He asks, to no avail. He'll take the silence as confirmation. 

"It's because I don't want them to mourn me, even though I'll be alive." 'In anomaly form' She leaves out but certain he'd figure it out. He'd always been good at reading between the lines, even when he didn't need to. 

He'd mourn her, despite staying alive—he'd grieve her fate. 

Y/N thinks the silence is unbearable. It had always been comfortable around the first year ghoul, but after his confession, the silence was heavy.

"You don't think it's presumptuous?" It's not meant to be a serious question, it's something to fill the void, but his stare on her lingers. It lacks any pity -one she's so used to seeing- or fear. 

"I'd mourn you." Her eyes widen in shock—how long had he looked at her like that? Why did he look... bewitched, betrothed? 

"Not what I asked." 

For the rest of his life, he'd mourn her. 

She doesn't know what else to say. What else to do except apologise over and over?

So she does, "I'm sorry." Yeah, that's all she does—apologise. Yet, somehow, strangely, even that part of her was enchanting. Falling feels awful, but what can he do? He's human, after all. 

"Thanks for listening." He mumbles, turning around to face the endless forest. She only nods, rubbing her neck hesitantly. What an ending to their friendship.