#like the mario kart livestreams or pt...guys...

[cloud-gays]

as much as I get the dnp doing any joint content in the gaming channel I do miss them doing proper gaming😭 that's why I love the Undertale series and I know they can't handle backseat gaming but pls...for me..

[demonphannie]

dan and phil - june 2017

6/12

first week (1-7): dan wants to eat and be alone for his birthday. phil likes snuggling with cats. politics and pizza and chill. new gaming video: ARE GAMERS NERDS? - Google Autocomplete Game! dan puts the succ in succulents. barbecue becomes floorbecue (context but dan and phil have barbecue with dan’s grandparents). phil is recognized as the dan and phil guy! dan and phil release a shirt to support manchester. phil relaxes with some attack on titan. dan liveshow! (highlights: new webcam, gonna make a new youtube banner, loved the one love manchester concert, at his all boys school when they got shots they all punched each other because it would hurt more, his grandparents visited, his grandma brought an or-rey-o cake, cake scene whom, he and phil and friends played dungeons and dragons and dan was a fucking edgelord, he went to the gym and jogged 10km and couldn’t move the next morning, he went because phil wasn’t there and he was bored, cavemen over dinosaurs existentialism over nihilism, he has nothing against wearing dresses, he’s practicing piano more, he has ten succulents) + bonus thumbnail. new gaming video: MOTION CONTROL VIOLENCE - Dan vs. Phil: ARMS.

second week (8-14): dan wants you to VOTE. phil wants you to VOTE. edward snowden and jeremey corbyn interact with dan on twitter. obligatory democracy selfie. phil liveshow! (highlights: listened to a sexual podcast when going to the gym, he ate very unhealthily as a child, beauty tips with phil: dry shampoo in hair before you go to sleep, toothpaste on pimples, don’t drop things on your feet or they will bruise, daddy cleaned us, cake scene whom, the ampersand is broken, he was gonna live in the gaming room but decided they needed more space for the gaming so now he lives in a broom cupboard under the stairs, martyn moved, he’s been watching love island, his bday gifts for dan are things phil wants, he has two coffees a day). jeremy corbyn is one thicc bih according to dan. new gaming video: THE MOST FRUSTRATING GAME EVER MADE - Dan and Phil play: I Am Bread. dan loves wonder woman. dan and phil went to wahaca (food for before dan’s bday). DAN’S BIRTHDAY!!! phil posts a pic of dan playing mariokart and it’s like pretty cute. “i don’t feel 26 but when you consider i have a 16 year old’s body and the crushed soul of someone aged 36 it kinda makes sense” (does dan know how to do math). bryony posts some cute pics on her insta story confirming they went to a sushi place and a sky bar (1+2+3). rare birthday boye pic. it stops the bees tweets from cat for dan’s birthday. phil bought dan (himself) a fidget spinner. new amazingphil video: TRY NOT TO CRINGE - My Dating Emails (tinder ad). phil almost blinds himself with the fidget spinner. dan’s life is on hold now that nintendo is releasing a pokemon switch game (and also he’s going to leave dead animals on nintendo’s doorstep if they do not make an animal crossing game). dan changed his twitter icon from this to this. dan liveshow! (highlights: birthday, comic sans, phil’s used the fidget spinner more than him, also got a weather crystal thingy from phil, dan also got sunflowers, dan HATES sunflowers, i HATE dan, terrarium of the day, his family has a pattern of giving dan colin themed gifts this time being a tshirt, friends got him a skull filled with vodka, he loves the babadook, phil is away, no phil liveshow, dan is phil’s pr agent, pokemon gotta catch em all, rant about how annoyingly perfect chris pine is, steven universe discourse, he cringed at phil’s video). also dan’s tweet for his liveshow mentioned (and friendzoned) phil for no reason. also here is some weird shit dan thought he would make his icon. wow young people these days and their exam memes. phil is a finger guns kinda guy. new gaming video: DIL GETS PREGNANT - Dan and Phil Play: Sims 4 #41. 

third week (15-21): when phil is away dan will post irrelevant sceenshots of what they text each other and it’s sorta sad sorta cute. angery wasps. dan’s houseplants are thriving. phil craves that mineral. new daniel howell video: The Memeing Of Life. centipede drama with documentarist phil lester (also phil doesn’t have wooden floors in his room but ok). dan wishes happy fathers day to dil? phil liveshow! (highlights: thank you for all the fathers day wishes, strong air conditioning in his “room”, he got his dad jams and hacksaw ridge, he has a big family and a lot are in australia, dan was scurred of the centipede, he’s trying to get louise to name her new baby phil, dan is worth £6, he hurt himself with the fidget spinner, not watching love island anymore, chris pine is distracting, some beauty tips, flat earth). “england more like fuckimmeltingdeargodhowcaniescapethisunbearableheatimsweatingoutofmyeyeballswhereisallthebloodyrainweresupposedtohaveland.” some limited edition merch. dan and phil appear in an anthony padilla video. new gaming video: THIS GAME IS TOO BLOODY HARD - Dan and Phil play: Keep Talking And Nobody Explodes #3. oh no phil almost went live in the bath. wow going to america (or are they). phil likes topless guys showering horses. dan and phil appear in #youtubers4grenfell livestream. 

fourth week (22-30): dan and phil #spotted at the airport. dan and phil at vidcon! night of community where dan and phil have a bicker about whose fault it was that they missed their flight to la (run down: dan lost his passport and phil booked the car late and they almost missed vidcon). also the try guys do a funny impression of dan and phil. dan explains. nice pics of the night of community. pics of dan and phil leaving the night of community. phil slept nice. youtube water. dan and phil and tyler. dan and phil meet and greet (not all the pics but some highlights: one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten). lil peek into a markiplier vlog. dan and phil @ a party just eating and playing ddr (one + two + three). dan and phil with cute doggo. new gaming video: HELP WE ARE SO LOST 🌎🤔 - Dan vs. Phil: GeoGuessr. dan apologizes for being extra even tho he’s always extra. dan’s an edgelord. dan and phil are jean jacket boyes. dan and phil on the fine bros instagram story + on twitter. dan and phil and badly drawn models. dan is angery on facebook. phil is going to another dimension. new amazingphil video: DAN CURLS MY HAIR! fine bros video: YOUTUBERS REACT TO NICKI MINAJ CHALLENGE (#NICKIMINAJCHALLENGE). dan is an edgelord pt 2. they are on cat’s insta story. ACurlyPhil selfie. dan and phil in a tomska vlog (@ 22:57 and 33:00). just touched down in london town. new gaming video: WATCH US WRECK SOME LOSERS ONLINE - Mario Kart 8 Deluxe. dan and phil play with cat’s new pup in this video which made my entire body tingle. wow crash bandicoot is out.

the floor is my undying love for dan and phil.

[britesparc]

Weekend Top Ten #483

Top Ten Non-Predictions About Not-Quite E3

So E3 is upon is at last! Nearly. Almost. Sort of. A bit. But after a year in which the world-famous videogame trailer convention and Keanu Reeves meme factory was sidelined by this virus thing (Google it), it’s nice to have a major entertainment landmark back in the calendar.

Last year was a bit frustrating, but also interesting. For a long time I’ve wondered about the need – as a consumer – for huge conventions such as E3. It makes sense for the industry, sure, the same way Sundance or something does for film: it’s a way for creators to showcase their wares and hopefully secure deals or employment. But as a way of showing to the public games that are in development, or announcing new things, it’s seemed old-fashioned for quite a while. It requires developers and executives to turn into PT Barnum or something, hawking their wares on elaborate stages, titivating their offerings with dances and celebrity appearances. Sure, sometimes it’s genuinely excellent and entertaining, but most often it’s memorable for all the wrong reasons. With many companies now engaging directly with fans by releasing curated videos that announce their games in their own way, in their own time, would that not have been better? If last year is anything to go by, then no, not really. What we got – and this may have been in large part due to 2020’s unique circumstances – was a long, long summer and autumn filled with rumour and conjecture, and occasional, uninspiring videos, often featuring CG trailers, often for games that were literally years away. On the one hand, lots was announced; on the other, it all felt vague and woolly, and the slow drip-feed did nothing but build anticipation to unrealistic proportions. Without E3 serving as some kind of anchor point – in time, if nothing else – then the spray-gun smattering of videos, trailers, and announcements felt disparate and a little disappointing.

And so it’s back! But not quite. Because, understandably, the huge convention aspect is gone, replaced by a wholly online event. And whilst this may be detrimental to people who want to secure a distribution deal for their game, it might actually make for better showcases for us, the unwashed masses. Instead of a ninety-minute stagebound light entertainment extravaganza that ends up feeling like a ten million dollar school play, we’ll (hopefully) get tightly edited videos that highlight the games, alongside trimmed-down and relevant talking head interviews from developers explaining what we can expect and just how many bumps they’ve managed to map this year. At least, that’s what I hope will happen.

Of course, exactly what E3 is nowadays is a bit weird anyway, and this year exacerbates that. Loads of companies seem to shun the show itself but schedule their presentations for the same week or thereabouts, giving us, what, a fortnight (with a “gh”) or so of things to look forward to. I mean, it feels a bit weird putting this list out a full week before E3 formally kicks off, but I wanted to try to pre-empt any interesting amusing reveals that might occur in the days preceding (at the time of writing, Nintendo haven’t announced a new Switch, despite everyone on Twitter saying it was due any minute now). To be honest, I always like to look for the random stuff anyway, as the huge games tend to be known about or heavily rumoured well in advance (it felt like an open secret for at least a year that Playground Games were developing a new Fable, for instance, and we were just waiting to see when Microsoft would announce that). So I’ve tried to make these predictions daft, wish-fulfilment, or at least offer some kind of personal spin on the sort of thing we might expect. And, of course, as someone who tends to prefer to play on Xbox or Nintendo, there will be a skew towards those companies (anyway, Sony don’t really have a presence at E3 nowadays). And like I’ve said before, the really personal wish-fulfilment stuff I always used to “predict” in these things have started to come true – we’ve got Fable and Perfect Dark on the way, and we had Crackdown 3 a couple of years ago. If it goes on like this I’m just going to have to start wishing for loads of old Amiga games to get rebooted.

You heard it here first: E3 2022 is when we get the third-person open world Ruff ‘n’ Tumble reboot we’ve all asked for.

Anyway, here are ten predictions for E3 that probably won’t happen.

Halo Infinite multiplayer beta: we know Halo will be there, because it’s front and centre of Microsoft’s little announcement picture thing (along with what appears to be a bit of the Starfield logo). As the image also seems to show multiplayer Spartans, I imagine this will be the focus rather than more campaign gameplay. I actually think this is a big risk, as the main criticism of Halo last year was that its graphics weren’t good enough; typically, I’d say, the campaign visuals are stronger than the multiplayer portion, which tends to focus on elegantly designed levels and fast-moving gameplay. I wonder if there’ll be another, longer look at the campaign sometime later in the summer, in a dedicated Halo presentation. Anyway, one thing I think MS will do to curry favour is announce an imminent multiplayer beta. Maybe there’ll be a sign-up, but I think it would be cool if it was available for anyone in Game Pass Ultimate. It’s a way to get people to sign up for the service, and that seems to be Microsoft’s main goal right now.

Games ready to play RIGHT NOW: Psychonauts 2, Age of Empire IV, and the Xbox version of Flight Simulator have all been given age ratings recently, something that only happens relatively close to a game’s release. I think that at least one of these – maybe all three! – will be shown at the Xbox presentation, and then declared to be available immediately on Game Pass. Again, it bigs up Microsoft’s service, and would also be a cool mic drop moment for games that might be anticipated but aren’t quite the triple-A behemoths of Halo, Fallout, or Gears.

All the rays, nicely traced: one thing that’s been a bit frustrating as an Xbox Series X owner is the lack of genuine next-gen feeling experiences. I’ve really enjoyed the upgrade from a base Xbox One, and playing a game like Gears 5 feels like a huge improvement (and it’s gorgeous too). But I want to see crazy stuff that the old box couldn’t do, and not just in higher resomolutions. One of the things that I’d love to see is more ray-tracing; this is a next-gen graphical treat that, to me, feels like when I first saw games with dynamic coloured lighting twenty-five years ago. So I hope we get a proper reveal/release date for the ray-traced Minecraft expansion, but I’d also love it – now that Xbox owns everything – if the ray-traced version of Quake 2 was announced for the console. Give me them rays, Microsoft!

Quaking: speaking of the Quake series, it’s the first game’s twenty-fifth anniversary this year, and I think it needs some love. Now, id are working on their Doom reboot trilogy thing, so I don’t expect to see a fully-fledged reimagining for a few years yet, but how about re-releasing the original game on modern consoles? Doesn’t need anything fancy, just like the ports of the first Doom that are ten a penny. Quake is a bit more complex to port, it’s true, but I still think it’d be amazing to see it on consoles before the end of its anniversary year.

Nothing but Star Wars: outside of the Xbox-Bethesda conference, I hope we see some lovely, lovely Star Wars goodies. There are a few projects in development, but I’m gonna stick my neck out and say that we’ll get a fairly long look at the Knights of the Old Republic remake/reboot, a very vague teaser trailer for Fallen Order 2 (maybe even just a title reveal), and a teaser for the open-world game from Ubisoft. I don’t, unfortunately, think we’ll see anything of Lego Star Wars: The Skywalker Saga until the Lego livestream later this summer, but for what it’s worth I’m not expecting that game till Christmas now.

Old games on Switch: I think one of the things Nintendo is going to announce is a bunch of older games coming to the Switch. We already have Skyward Sword coming, but I think we’ll hear about other classic Zelda games coming in the anniversary year. Maybe remastered Metroid Prime games too? And I think they’ll do another one of those battle royale-style versions of their classics, maybe the first Donkey Kong?

New games on a new Switch: the sheer weight of “New Switch” rumours seems to suggest it is real, but when are they announcing it if their E3-ish Direct is all about software? I wonder if we’ll see some new games for Christmas ’21 going into ’22 that are then revealed to be enhanced by this mythical Super Switch. We’ll probably see a bit more of Breath of the Wild 2 (although I think there’ll be a bigger Zelda-focused Nintendo Direct later this year). I’m gonna predict Pikmin 4. And vague teasers for both a brand new Metroid Prime game, and also for Mario Kart 9. And all of these will be designed to run better on Switchy McSwitchface. Whenever that comes out.

Microsoft buys more companies: I just think this is inevitable, and I reckon we’ll get another announcement next week. Which companies? God knows. The Flight Sim guys maybe, or The Medium developers. Or, I dunno, Team 17. Probably not Sega, as funny as that would be. Maybe a medium-sized Japanese developer. So, yeah; Microsoft’s spending spree isn’t quite over.

Sony’s not-E3 announcements: Sony appears to be skipping E3 altogether, again. So when will they have their next big video presentation? I don’t think we’ll have to wait too long personally. So what will they talk about? I’d have thought we’d see the next Spider-Man revealed this year, but the big chitter-chatter at the moment is the whole “cross-gen” conversation (my opinion is: who cares?), and also when their games will come out. well, call me pessimistic, but I think Horizon: Forbidden West will end up being early 2022, with the new God of War and Gran Turismo ending up as late 2022 releases.

Crazy talk: I think this has ended up being a relatively straight and rational list, which just won’t do. So let’s get some wild ones out of the way here at the end. Sony announces remastered versions of Lemmings and Lemmings 2 for PC! Microsoft is making new games starring their Avatars! Double Fine release a PC version of Scurvy Scallywags for Game Pass! A brand new Duke Nukem! Lucasfilm bring Ron Gilbert back to oversee a reboot of Monkey Island! Nintendo announces Switch Sports! Gabe Newell announces VR support for Xbox Series X with an exclusive port of Half-Life: Alyx! Peggle 3! Phew, glad to get that out of my system.