#like so many of them show Dabi always going to Shig for emotional support instead of being vulnerable eith Hawks

[satancopilotsmytardis]

Oki now Im curious, what hit you to change from writing dabihawks to shigadabihawks to shigadabi?

I thought that there was chemistry between Shigadabi, and I always struggled to make up a reason why Shigaraki would be into Hawks, as I started writing more and more and transitioning to writing primarily from Dabi's POV I also kept feeling like either him or Hawks putting their personal feelings about Endeavor on the backburner so they could date was a misrepresentation of who they both were as characters. When I started to think how their relationship could work outside of that, it fell apart and I lost interest in Hawks.

Shigadabi, on the other hand, just started to work more and more for me. Shigaraki has no fear of cringe and is extremely emotionally available. He trusts Dabi and readily shows that he believes he's capable by giving him more responsibilities. Shigaraki is also the only person Dabi really listens to and he puts in a lot of effort to try to make the League work when they're at their lowest point even though he bitches about the others not doing enough. Their similarities and the fact they are already on equal footing with them both being villains (and thus removing the hurdle of Dabi or Hawks always feeling like they have to prove themselves to the other) means that Dabi may be more willing to be emotionally vulnerable with Shigaraki which is what I think he needs in a relationship. This is also something that was showing even in my primarily Dabihawks days in Bonded, as Dabi struggled for a while to accept his mark for Hawks, but sought out Shigaraki and understood him (and vice versa) when he was feeling worn-down from spending time with Hawks. This theme also was very apparent in Out of My Head (Bring Me Back) where Dabi went to Shig not just for sex but for the emotional support/stability he felt being with Shig offered him while things were constantly out of control with Hawks. At the time having Dabihawks be turbulent just felt like a part of the enemies-to-lovers trope, and it can be, but specifically in my writing, it started to feel more and more like that relationship was being forced to work when it didn't benefit Dabi in any way and was just a tool to facilitate Hawks' growth as a character.

Once I decided I was more interested in Dabi specifically having a relationship that worked for him and that he wouldn't have to be the one trying to constantly facilitate his partner's growth, I started to lean towards Shigadabi because I felt like they could actually support each other. Duster has turbulent emotions that he puts on full display, but as we see from Kamino through PLF (Not caught up, no spoilers past that) he also will let people yell at him and not blink, just move forward pretty logically and try to do right by his people, which is something Dabi desperately needs after a childhood of being told he wasn't enough and getting thrown aside. Dabi, on the other hand, can help lend context for the abuse that Shigaraki suffered all throughout his life and help him actualize who he is and wants to be moving forward without the expectations of his father figure. This is a similar role to what he did for Hawks in my Dabihawks stories, but the crucial difference is that once he opens Shig's eyes even a bit to this, Duster puts in the work himself to figure out who he wants to be and how he needs to grow without needing constant oversight, reassurance, and support from others because he is ready and willing to learn and adapt to every new experience he has.

That's the long explanation, but the short one is that I think Shigadabi, based on my interpretation of the characters, is a more emotionally fulfilling relationship than Dabihawks, and Shigadabihawks was just a stepping stone to get to that point!