#like it's alright don't get me wrong just doesn't fit the setting imo

[akuma-tenshi]

i have this silly little idea of these two (+ a couple others) going on some sort of dnd-style fantasy adventure together and they have THE funniest fucking dynamic ever. god they hate each other. orpheus has two goals in life and that's to take care of memory and make frederick's life absolutely miserable and i'm just constantly imagining silly scenarios with them it's so fun

[little-shit-with-zero-control]

Alright here we go (because I have a lot of feelings):

TW: I'm gonna be a hater with MY OWN OPINIONS here, take it with a grain of salt. If you like it, that's fine. It is not an indicative of your morality and you can do what you want or what you feel is best. I even enjoy some fics that have these things. I am just a hater, ignore me or not

Reader characters that are described eenie, teenie, tiny, small whatever. Basically something that describes them as the standard skinny girl

This could include smaller waist, smaller wrist, smaller arms, etc. But somehow they always give them big boobs if the reader is female/AFAB (imo reader fics should try to be inclusive and it just takes me out of the fic when the fic's reader character gives off “typical skinny anime girl with big honkers” vibes). Omegaverse fics where the omega/beta reader is just a skinny twinky anime character makes me so mad because YOU DON'T HAVE TO MAKE THEM SMALLER!!! JUST HAVE THE LOVE INTEREST BE MUCH BIGGER AND STRONGER JESUS FUCKING CHRIST. I UNDERSTAND the desire for size difference and physical power imbalance (bcoz same 😌✋). But just highlight how big (or strong) the love interest/s is/are, not how small and petite Reader/YN is. Make the reader character feel suffocated. Make them feel the heebie jeebies. MAKE THEM FEEL SMALLER!!! TERRIFIED!!! SUFFOCATED!!! HAVE THEM OVERPOWER THE READER, NOT WEAKEN THE READER This is honestly easier to ignore with monsterfucker fics (in my own humble opinion) because no matter how big you are, the other person/monster is bigger (and stronger). You could have the monster in question haul you over without breaking a sweat no matter the height and weight (shout out to @obsessivevoidkitten and her monsterfucker fics especially for her size inclusive fics even if the fics isn't explicitly made for chubby readers, lemme take a second to put Yandere Bull Man (Arrin) x Reader here, cuz it's my fave and I always go back to it when I want to be comforted and spoiled) You mean to tell me that in order for this person to be able to overpower me, I have to be skinny?! This is the fic equivalent of me having to not wear heels so that my date is not insecure about their height eugghhhhh. Honestly fics like these sometimes are like those free size clothes where they promise you that it would fit you BUT IT DOESN'T and it. Just. RUINS. THE ENTIRE. EXPERIENCE!!!

The use of the word 'cunny'

WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOOIIIINGGGGGGGG!!! IS THIS A FANFIC OR A FUCKING COMMENT ON A LOLI ART POST IN A WEEB SUBREDDIT? I SWEAR TO GOD, YOU MIGHT AS WELL ADD THE 😭EMOJI!!! Pussy dessicating fr I swear, the amount of fanfic (especially König x reader fanfics) that uses that word makes me so mad. Like, really? Just use pussy or cunt or hole! This is prolly correlated to the 'small reader' complaint that I have because cunny implies a cute dainty reader but it just gives of "The love interest of this fic is actually Drake into underaged girls, not even a simply controversially yet legal young adult woman" vibes That word belongs in a comment section in a post of an underaged anime girl (who is totally a 1000 year old goddess bro trust me bro) not in a fanfic made by to get people's rocks off If I had a dick, it would retreat inside my body and go "euggghhhhh"

Gummy walls

You guys ruined Pinkie Pie's pet and chewing gum for me, fuck you

Overly feminine reader (and doesn't tag/say so)

By that I mean reader whose life gives off "Tiktok aesthetic" vibes. Like they give/describe reader wearing a very specified set of clothes or too much of a personality iykwim. It just rubs me the wrong way. This is an x reader not an oc x character. It just gives of Wattpad book vibes ngl

Long blocks of texts with no line breaks

Come on, now. It can't be that hard to press 'Enter'.

(e/c) (h/c) and the like

It just breaks the immersion and I don't want to pause reading just so I could recall what these are. Just say 'their eyes' or 'their hair'. This is actually much more common around 10-5 years ago than it is now so I don't see much of these thing

A fic that explicitly describes a reader with straight hair

As someone with curly hair and dealt with various mean (an understatement) things throughout her life until recently, this just irks me. It just takes me out of the fic. Even if it's a fic that only had the reader straighten their hair for no plot relevant reason. No. I would not fucking do that, that's nasty It's actually very rare that reader is given an explicitly straight hair, jut implied

Accents that are written so strongly in a fic that I just can't understand it.

Common in COD fics with Soap in it. Like I don't know if you are making fun of him and other Scottish people or if that's really how Scottish people talk. Now it prolly might be a skill issue because English is my second language and my grasp on the English language is based on how school taught it to us at a young age and my exposure to various media and the internet at a young age but still.

No punctuation and all lowercase

I don't mind bad grammar or spelling mistakes (if it's not THAT bad) because I know that English can be hard for people who are not exposed to it at a young age. But it does slightly bother me if there is no proper punctuation because it makes it harder for me to read it, same goes to all lowercase fics (it's fine if it's short but it slightly hurts my eyes when it's 2k+ words)

Bimbo Reader where the other characters (the love interest) clearly don't care about reader's interests

Boo. Jail for them other charas. Not all of them are bad. I actually liked some of them but that's because the characters in the fic took interests in the BReader's likes and hobbies and showcased their dynamics. Now, I do understand that the writers are into degradation and dehumanization that a Bimbo reader fic can give but again, I'm just not into it.

Characters that are too ooc that it might as well be a whole new character

Reader being given a name

That's an OC, dumbass

Cheating Yanderes that don't get their comeuppance

FUCK YOU!!! I hope your favorite female character from a shonen anime becomes a housewife with no other personality other than wife and mom.

Reader having an explicit callsign (COD specific)

I just feel like is the same as giving the reader chara a name. Kinda like how Simon is Ghost, Johnny is Soap, and Kyle is Gaz.

Reader being given specific descriptions (even if they don't have any explicit name) such as hair, body type, outfit, etc.

That's an OC with extra steps Now, I would have to explain myself a little bit further here. I am referring to when a fic just straight up describes the reader character that might as well be a description for an OC (giving them specific eye color, hair color, body type etc. combined). I am not talking about fics that is something on the lines of chubby!Reader, curly!Reader, etc. These are fics made because most fics are made with assumption that the MC is skinny, has straight hair, and vaguely European or American or white or light-skinned, and it does makes others that do not fit this demographic alienated. These fics are there to make others feel included and seen. And I fucking love them

Characters who have some kind of mental disorder (let's say anxiety) being babyfied or owo-fied

Neurodivergent characters being infantilized

Now for my (possibly) unpopular opinion

Y/N is fine, actually

I want to say that in my heart of hearts. Y/N and their cousin, [Name], isn't really that bad or immersion breaking. Y/N is like a self-insert we play as. They are here to represent us. They are our eyes and ears. It is our player character. Our avatar. We are them. They are us. I don't mind a fic going: "Y/N!!!" instead of You hear someone shout out your name because in my opinion it just fits the pacing and the vibes more. Of course, it is better to minimize the usage of Y/N but if you feel like it fits the pacing/wording/situation/overall vibe/feeling better, using Y/N might actually work better instead of various alternatives. Sometimes a nickname or epithet could work but sometimes, good ol' reliable Y/N L/N is just better.

Again, I want to say that there are fics that had the stuff from the above that I enjoyed and even if I didn't, I know that it was very great but not something that I, myself specifically, liked.

y’all, what’s something that will turn you away from a fic? it could be anything. dialogue, formatting, the way a person is being described, secondhand embarrassment, characterization, etc?

[byunbaekhyunie]

but i want your opinion on the music video 🧐

omg thank u for asking me cause i didnt wanna bore anybody with my two cents critic but i have so much to say!!（＞人＜）

alright so real quick abt the music - cause that ties into how I feel abt the mv - I don't think MAVERICK is a great song. IMO, it's the weakest out the album but most importantly, it doesn't fit the concept of the comeback musically. We're operating within this dark dystopian universe, and somehow the b-sides do a much better job at conveying that eerie, grim atmosphere than MAVERICK does. Normally, or ideally I should say, the title track sets the tone and everything else follows suit, here I feel like the song is out of place, it's mismatched with the rest. So when I'm watching the mv, it all falls very flat for me cause the music doesn't compliment the visuals and vice versa...

now,,, abt the music video itself. Maybe this is a me problem because I love lore, but this mv has no narrative spine. And that in and out of itself isn't a problem, not everything needs a crazy complex three-act structure, a great example is Thrill Ride ; it's just a simple video of them singing and having fun, there's no bigger picture and that's great. But here.. they're referencing Battle Royale (2000), one of the most prominent east asian movies of all time, it's a cultural staple, not only is there symbolism here that's left untapped but there's so much to pull from in terms of storyline! It's insane to me that they wouldn't want to do the bare minimum to pull all this together a little more neatly, even more so considering the global phenomenon that is Squid Game atm like it would be so easy to piggyback off of that just for marketing sake.. and like idk,, I was left so perplexed by this video that I had to go and make sure that it was directed and produced by HAUS OF TEAM, which it is indeed :/

Now don't get me wrong, I love HAUS and their work with tbz, I think they're really good at creating a visual universe, they even got Cho Giseok to shoot some of their pictures!! They're a very good production team,, and maybe I should direct part of my grievances to Cackler Ent. too but, they're missing someone who could take it a step further with good writing and storytelling. I'm so worked up abt this cause there's so much potential there, and it would set them forward by a landslide I think if they could figure that out. Like, I would've loved for a little backstory teaser to lay down some ground rules and set some stakes. Cause here's the thing: idk why tbz are there, if they're there by choice or by force, idk if there's a motive to fight, idk anything !! The collars would've made a nice entry point into the story for example. I have to say, I was surprised when I saw that both the trailer and the teaser for this comeback were... essentially the same thing. It's a downgrade in quality when u compare it to what they did for The Stealer, or even Thrill Ride.. Sidenote: I hope this doesn't set the tone for what's gonna happen after the play m merger cause... oof 😐

Overall, the video lacks any sort of cinematic ambition that it almost feels cheap. It's shot so incredibly tightly that it takes away any immersive experience, which is a shame considering that they were filming on location, smth they haven't done in a while if u exclude Christmassy! Like to me, that's not good use of the set. There's very little prop and what little there is isn't utilized properly. Just some examples: Sangyeon's bag. what's in it? is it money? is it weapons? where and how did he get his hands on it? ; Haknyeon's pencil. like... just why. ; Jacob uses a rocket launcher but we're not shown who/what he shoots, why he shoots it, there's not even one blow up scene to try to create the tiniest semblance of narrative cohesion like? u gotta ask urself at this point, why even bother? And like I said, it wouldn't be hard at all to tie some of the details together for the sake of a cleaner narrative arc...

And it's not like the song helps tie it all together either, cause according to the lyrics I'm led to believe that they're all social misfits who do this for the love of the game. Or if u really wanna push it, u could argue that they go from 'Back in the game' to 'Breaking the game' which means that in fact, they're coming up with ways to outsmart whoever's in control of the Battle Royale ; effectively creating their own path and their own rules (i.e. MAVERICK wow). Which is all fine and dandy, but doesn't substitute for the missing narrative thread in the mv..

But not only is the storyline full of holes, it gets borderline nonsensical. Like during the comeback show, Sunu said that he loses to Kevin. Like in that scene where they fight, Sunwoo loses and like? somehow he finds himself outside. With just a scratch on his cheek after Kevin throws a grenade at him????? Like that's one aspect that I wholeheartedly don't understand is that it seems in their version of a battle royale, no one dies... Which contradicts the entire concept of what battle royale is and is why I need more context here.

Like here are just some very simple ideas out of my own little peanut brain of how they could have introduced some deeper storylines: - to me, the shot where Kyeobmuda stands together alludes to them being, if not a team, on some sort of truce at least ; therefore I think it could've been cool for Changmin to have an arrow in his leg when he's wounded and crawling on the floor to call back to when Chanhee shoots an arrow seemingly in. that. same. corridor. like come on that shit writes itself, like it would've been an interesting way to introduce friendship and betrayal, and explained why both of them are crying at the end,, or idk anything for a more engaging story - Younghoon manages to escape from Changmin after being tied up but for what? he's not even seen escaping. He has a lighter with him at some point, could've been a nice call back to have a scene where smth (or god forbid, even someone) is set on fire - the 'TAKE A BREATH' note that's given to Hyunjae, I feel that it hints at the gas chamber where he and Juyeon get trapped by Sangyeon and like idk if maybe instead of that stupid pencil, they had give Haknyeon a red pen or the other way around so that it tied together with the note like that could've explained why Jyu and Hyunjae both seem to be immune to whatever gas they're inhaling in there, like if Haknyeon had warned Hyunjae so that he could've saved himself from Sangyeon's plan without him knowing like HELLLLLOOOO - and finally, just anything. ANYTHING. to make that final message make sense like 'Protect yourself from what u want' well If Only. If only I knew what it is that they wanted like pls tell me, I'm Begging to know.

so yea, closing statement. Unfortunately, MAVERICK was a disappointment for me. It might be my least favorite the boyz comeback to date, if I wasn't already worried abt merger before lol... All that being said, I would like to end on a few positive notes so  I like the outfits... and the choreo is decent. Juyeon looks really handsome with his hair cut short like that.. and also I wanna compliment tbz for their overall performance, the acting, the dancing, everything, I think they did great with what little was given to them and in such short notice too, which is.. an umpteenth reason why I wish the company would've gone the extra mile for them instead of pushing to release a 3 song album in 2 months :/

guess i'll have to sustain myself with the 2 b-sides and my imagination until next cb ^^'

[mowu-moment]

i feel controversial & i care too much, so here's my des rocs complete tierlist

ranked list & reasoning (ish) under the cut

1. WAYNE: hoholy shit wayne. can hardly put into words how explosive this one is to me. the intro sets a Whole Mood before swiftly (& cleanly) smacking it down into an Absolute Banger and i don't use the term lightly. very hard not to scream along with it. only detriment is that wayne the person is kinda an ass in the mmc video but that's no qualm

2. POS: basically the same thing as wayne (oh both have great lyrics btw, this one more so), only gets points knocked for being 2 minutes long and having 30 seconds of that being intro & outro. go danny give us nothing

3. WHY WHY WHY: there's a theme among my top picks--they're all hard-hitting w/ killer guitar. the lyrics are absolute batshit in a good way, but the chorus is a lil flat & i feel like in general it just needed a touch more spice to score the top spot. or maybe it's just seniority & it'll have a coup a few months out idk

4. DEAD RINGER: similar killer guitar & lyrics but this one is Groovy as Hell. don't particularly like his singing in this one & it's too repetitive if i'm feeling grumpy but there's something so magic about after the bridge. top 10 songs to twirl a flag to

5. NOTHING PERSONAL: the minute long outro irks me & it's a little bit empty but plays into that well. groovy, great lyrics, the Sexiest Guitar Solo of the lot, the screaming's a minus but it does have an emotion there. not entirely sure what one but it's there.

6. LET ME LIVE / LET ME DIE: his first time being all over the goddamn place, history was made. amazing guitar, a little worse lyrics than 1-4 i'll admit, the intro Slays me both in a good and bad way. must be a joy to play live where he can just drag out that intro & bridge as long as feels right. at least i liked it in the digital concert like that. would actually kill me in a physical concert, imagine how much stomping gets going to that beat. bonus points for presumable cowbell

7. PIECES: for once not this high for the guitar & lyrics, they're both kinda basic. idk what's about this one but it just takes me to a separate dimension & i love it so much for that. really fills those earholes. also a bit of personal meaning, heard it for the first time on the day we moved into the house i'm currently split-custody-living in (is that tmi?) & the first music video of his i saw. man i love some spaghetti on the wall

8. SLO: basically the same as dead ringer, but knocked points for a kinda lame outro & the subject matter being a little less interesting to me. still lovely.

9. HANGING BY A THREAD: not my normal fare really & the way that the ends of the verses don't really fit in the pacing of them is bleh, but it's just so reminiscent of the songs my brother puts on whenever we hang out together that it just makes me all warm & fuzzy. it's also nicely put together which is something i'll have to start saying for. the later list.

10. SUICIDE ROMANTICS: this is where i start griping about head voice & higher pitches in general. don't like em so the pre-chorus is a lil annoying. also not my normal fare but it's tender & the ending is awe-striking. imo better live where he's loud on that last line before the final chorus. not enough to bump it up though. shoutouts to love and a smoking gun, i still am dying to hear that one

11. THE PAST HAS PASSED AWAY: my favorite lyrics out of the first 2 ep's. only thing wrong with it really is the bridge getting kinda repetitive. love that last chorus heehoo. same schpeel as the Banger Category

12. MMC: this one's lower than the rest of the Bangers for being pop punk which is something the radio has made me dislike, i guess. that trope with the guitar in the second half of the chorus just kills me so much. improves greatly during & after the bridge, love that lil ragtime piano. generally the same bit as before but i do love him doing something un-romance-related. yeah fuck the establishment!

13. THE DEVIL INSIDE: reminds me A Lot of the electronic-ish cassettes i've got from the early 90's but that's just me. this one will probably move up as i get more used to it, but only a little bit. the first part of the second verse makes me like. genuinely uncomfy? but the second part of it's fantastic. ending's ass though what happened to the instrumence. bonus points for using 'reverie' that's an SAT word (maybe). good singing but returning to the gripe at higher pitches, just a little bit though

14. THIS IS OUR LIFE: feels shockingly generic for a des rocs song tbh but there's nothing really wrong with that. adore the bridge. singing's alright. kinda miffed that he doesn't pronounce the 'f' in the second 'life' in the chorus, but it makes sense here. that sort of thing won't later so i'm bringing it up now. guitar's nothing spectacular but fits nicely into the song, probably one of the most cohesive of his (especially in recent history).

15. OUTTA MY MIND: really lives in the same space as slo and dead ringer do in my head (most likely the 'songs to twirl a flag to' zone), but this is by far the worst of the three for when i'm grumpy. just. Very repetitive. back to great lyrics here but it's kinda hard to pick them out (i've heard the song at least 100 times by now & i'm still missing a few lines). still groovin'

16. RUBY WITH THE SHARPEST LIES: what the fuck actually goes on in this song by the way? not the premise or whatever it's just. so all over the place. the verses are incredible but bringing in another vocalist just for one line kills me. bridge is really cool but that one part i don't remember where it is, the one that alternates basically nothing & an Electronic Piano Chord blaring at ya? ruins it. partially anyhow. also can someone tell the people on genius that it's 'carved it in my skin' not 'crawled down in my skin'

17. GIVE ME THE NIGHT: same repetitive issue as outta my mind but it's not groovy enough to save it, shame. feels like a trial run of all the wackshit stuff he's been doing recently, with the additional vocal bits at the end & the kinda weird lyrics. it still has a place in my heart don't get me wrong but it's just fallen in favor of stuff that Commits to banger or batshit (or actually pulls off both strongly, yyy). oh yeah nice guitar alright singing etc etc

18. USED TO THE DARKNESS: similar story to give me the night. i love it i do, but it's just lackluster nowadays. also remember that under-pronunciation thing i brought up in this is our life? this is where that comes back. rampant i tell you! that second verse he just doesn't finish the words & i hate it!

19. DON'T HURT ME: i honestly don't know why this one isn't in D. the chorus bit where he just cuts it short is irksome. the lyrics aren't anything special. i don't know what i like about it. but i can tell it does exactly what it set out to do if that makes sense. respect, respect. and using missile in an analogy, he's getting creative with the vocab

20. LIVING PROOF: kinda got a vendetta against this one i think? i don't know why i hate this one but i do. it's just kinda, blah. like the perfect sort of thing to nightcore up. sentiment's lovely & i do love the lyrics even if they aren't impressive but like. it bores me to an extent

21. TICK (LIVE): separating the version i heard in the digital concert just to give it some credit, this one was actually kinda nice. another one with a nice sentiment & what he was going for is great. no clue what the second part of the second verse has to do with any of this though. and it also begins our final group, the songs that just feel empty. like there's not nearly enough going on. this one's alright though i was just hoping the studio version would add some flair. you can see where that one is though.

22. IMAGINARY FRIENDS: also got a vendetta against pop. kinda hate the sentiment here (contrast!), the chorus just falls short of what the verses prime me for, head voice is rampant, and yet i still swing along to it. it's infectious props to him. love the outro though, monkey laugh and all.

23. MAYBE, I: another empty one, like it's a four-note progression what is that. love his singing in it, and the chorus parts do round it out, but like. eh? it doesn't even give me much to say.

24. BORN TO LOSE: another flop on the chorus! too smooth i say! and i absolutely Despise the pitch-shifting thing going on. not something i was expecting him to express so points there, lyrics are nothing fancy to my Literary Mind though. initially good singing but the chorus he's just sloppy over it. the instrumental is lovely but the vocals just throw it so hard into the bin which is a right shame. fuck that outro too i hate that gimmick

25. I KNOW: here's where the bad batshit comes in. singing is some of his worst imo, does the other-vocalist thing for that bridge, genre i'm not fond of, just a soup of Stuff I Don't Like. not one i'd kill someone over putting as #1 like i can see where it comes from but. mmmmmhhhh bad. cover does NOT help his case.

26. HVY MTL DRMR: empirically i should put this one higher. but the chorus flops so goddamn hard it deserves to be in the bottom of the barrel. the verses are lovely for what he was doing back then! but then just... nothing!

27. RABBIT HOLE: i was so excited for this name but it's just sad boi hours playlist curated by some corporation you hate. probably the most nothing of them all, genuinely where are the instruments. what happened. was this one just shoehorned in as the final track just to pump numbers up. and i swear he had some autotune or something which only makes his voice worse it's fantastic naturally. also that's not what a rabbit hole is! that's not the idiom! a rabbit hole is when you go on a wikipedia spiral from jennifer lopez to group theory! not when you just have a shitty night's sleep or whatever this is! i'm not just miffed i'm downright annoyed

28. TICK (STUDIO): what the fuck happened des. how did you release this. it sounds like a 3rd grader singing for the school talent show it's so out of rhythm. singing's honestly kinda bad & the instrumental has the same problems i talked about in the live version. the last chorus is fine, i guess, but no i don't forgive him for what he did to tick.

[dustydreamsanddirtyscars]

i follow a lot of meta writers who say dean's story doesn't make sense without destiel. for example, amara was about exposing how dean felt about cas; the heart stuff how she found dean by touching cas' heart follow your heart all that. i ship destiel but don't think it will be endgame (wish it would be honestly). can i ask what do you think dean's story is without a destiel exposition? Do the amara and MoC and Mary story lines make sense without it? What is Dean's personal story and endgame?

Dear anon,

first and foremost what I want to emphasize going into this reply is that people can take away whatever they want from the show and read it in a way that suits their viewing of what happens on screen. All of what we see in those 45 minutes of television is influenced and shaped by our own experiences and interests, by the things that speak to us and move us or the aspects and topics we deem important. For that very reason readings and views will always differ simply because we all have our own focus. Things that stand out to one person, aren’t important for another for the sole reason that we tend to latch onto and project what moves us most into the narrative and analyze what plays out in the episode accordingly. What I mean is: it’s natural to disagree, there isn’t such a thing as ONE and ONLY ONE RIGHT reading. And there is nothing shameful or wrong about disagreeing with someone else, it’s all about how one expresses those differences of opinion. No one is better or worse or stupid for not seeing what someone else may see that doesn’t fit to your personal impression and perception of the show. In short: Live and let live.

The reason I am prefacing my reply with this long, more general ramble is due to the fact that I feel the fighting within the fandom over “right ways of reading and watching the show” or “people being too stupid to realize the show is saying this and this and not that and that” has gotten to a ridiculous and toxic point in which tolerance is lacking all around and on all sides and is seriously tiring to me, because it is just mind baffling to me why people can’t just be happy with what they read and see in the show and share it with the ones who see it similarly, but have to force their views on everybody else and get nasty over people having another view and takeaway than them and throwing around insults like there is no tomorrow.

With that all out of the way, let me tell you my view on Dean’s story. And just to make that clear from the get go :) no, I don’t think Dean’s story only makes sense when taking Deancas into account. It’s alright for me, if people argue that and feel that way, but to me it’s simply not the case and also imo takes away from Dean as a character in his own right.

I enjoy(ed) Deancas and like interactions between Dean and Castiel (though tbh since S11 to me a lot has changed and I no longer feel passionate or strongly about them, because to me the writers and how they handle the relationship atm is just too hollow and soulless for my taste, it simply no longer has the depth and “spark” for lack of a better word that it used to have in seasons prior, which still speak to me and move me when it comes to these two characters), but I do truly take issues with people arguing that Dean or his story only makes sense in relation to Castiel. I have the same issues with people arguing that Dean’s story and Dean only makes sense in relation to Sam. Of course both people are relevant to Dean’s story, but to me another person/characters should never be the most important thing about another character. So yeah, both of these viewings are the same to me in their essence, because in both cases it discredits Dean as a character in his own right in measures and ways I personally find very sad, because it belittles Dean. And Dean is much more than the people he loves (and this actually one aspect that is actually part of the show for Dean to realize) and that is kind of one of the main things that I personally feel relevant for Dean’s arc and possible endgame: seeing himself as worthy and important unrelated to any other person/character.

[[This week’s episode imo has highlighted a great deal how I personally see Dean’s story spanning from the first season onwards and what his struggles were and are that need to be overcome for him to be happy (if you browse my 13x03gif tag you’ll find all the meta I already wrote on the topic).]]

It may be for the very reason that Dean always puts others first and worries about them that people tend to see Dean only as an extension to another character. To me personally therefore one of the main things that has been explored heavily all throughout Carver Era and with that the Moc and Amara arc is addressing how “unfree” Dean has been all his life and how he has never truly listened or maybe even truly found out what he himself wants and is without the people he “cares for” (that is btw one huge point that was made in this week’s episode when Kelly told Jack that he didn’t have to be like his mother or father, but just himself and how this drastically differs to Dean who has been both unwanted - see meta and gifs for that here), because that very aspect - Dean thinking he needs to be this or that (mother, father and brother from age 4 onwards - as he himself openly now emphasized wasn’t fair) - has become Dean’s entire “reason for existence”. He thinks of himself as only useful when he can be of service and that is one tragic and horrible way not only of thinking about yourself (as unworthy, etc.), but also to live, because as the show has highlighted again and again when Dean feels like he cannot be of help, he thinks he lacks a reason to live and slips even further into a depression that is always glowering there just underneath the surface.

Due to all of what I mentioned just yet, I personally find it highly unfortunate that some people tend to make Dean all about Sam or Cas, because it falls completely in the trap that causes Dean so many issues since he himself only views himself as an extension to someone else, but that by no means means that that is right - quite the opposite. And that is also one of the many issues I have with Dabb’s showrunning and S12 in particular as in seasons prior the narrative addressed the discrepancy of Dean feeling like he matters least, etc. but that the characters around him constantly showed that that is not the case, but only something happening inside Dean’s head. Now S12 blatantly made it text that Dean does indeed not matter himself and I will never not be absolutely disgusted about that, because throughout the entire season we saw Dean put down, his emotions ignored, lied to (really, the way the season started, Mary trampling all over her son, is so emblematic of what happened throughout the entire season as well) and none of the treatment he experienced got corrected in the end, but Dabb friggin decided that it is a stellar idea to have Dean only briefly express how his mother’s death shaped him and messed him up (and yes, I get that it is in line with who Dean is and how he thinks so little of himself and putsothers traumas and needs first while ignoring his own, because they seem less important - see how that narrative thread runs through the whole show?) but that ultimately Dean as a person once more would disappear by making it all about Sam and talking about how Sam suffered (never mind Dean did and does too) and it also only then that his friggin mother is showing any kind of interest in her son. Only when her one son talks about the other son. Yeah, nice work there. But really, what took the cake for me with all that was how Mary didn’t even wrap Dean into a hug when he fucking saved her, but she opts to fall into Sam’s arms. Sorry, but gahhhh, I’ll never not be epicly pissed off about this.

Considering all this I am not surprised when people tend to think Dean has no story of his own or that it doesn’t make sense without Deancas or Sam on the other hand, but to me as someone who is most interested in each character in their own right much more than in any possible pairing, it is frustrating, because you feel like you are an island and belong nowhere. But sorry, I got caught up in my disliking of S12, I’m trying to get back on track now.

So given all that and the whole aspect of Dean’s “lack of freedom” due to feelings of responsibility are a huge aspect that to me was integral in the entirety of the MoC arc and the Amara arc as to me it explored Dean’s feelings of inadequacy and showing and exploring how Dean may have always been the main symbol for “free will”, but rarely has had it himself. In that regard, and I know this may be an utterly unpopular opinion to many, I have always analyzed Dean’s MoC arc and his time as a demon as a sort of “rite of passage” that served as a setting stone for Dean’s liberation, because it was as a demon that for the first time Dean only did what he himself wanted. It’s of course just one small aspect of a much more complex overall storyline, but to me it is an integral part nonetheless. Dean wasn’t happy as a demon by a long shot, but he did only what he wanted without feeling bad about having wishes of his own.

During the MoC and Amara arc Dean’s lack of independency from the people closest to him was amplified by making Dean unable to control what happened within himself when he held the blade or was in Amara’s closer vicinity. He was other directed, a puppet that got its strings pulled and that thread has been an integral one for Dean since we saw him strung up in Hell and torn apart (literally) by ropes tearing him apart every which way. To me there couldn’t be a more fitting and sadder visual for how Dean spent his entire life: caught in the middle, trying to keep a family together that drifted apart and getting torn apart and ending up hurt and damaged by trying to keep all of it together.

So in a way Dean losing his agency to the mark and then later Amara was just the utter extreme of showing how Dean for most of his life has not lived and done what he himself wanted, but what others needed him to do. The theme is right there, right from the beginning of the show and culminates for the first time in S4 and S5 when Dean rejects to become and be what Heaven wants him to be. The same strength he showed in relation to Michael, he never was able to show when it came to things his father demanded of him for example. There is a a famous scene where Dean articulates that himself in “Sacrecrow” in S1

and it comes back up here and there across the seasons when Dean expresses that he wished he would have stood up against their father more, etc. - the entire episode 9x06 “Bad Boys” also shines a huge light on that whole topic as we get a glimpse of the Dean there, who was allowed to be just a teen without feeling burdened and responsible to join his father’s fight.

For me Dean’s entire arc spanning over the course of the show is a storyline about self discovery about coming of age and coming into his own (an no with that I don’t mean a “coming out”-story, though of course it could be worked in or rather go hand in hand with that, but Dean’s sexual liberation to me has never been an integral topic from the beginning of the show and explored deeply until now, whereas the other has - again everyone is open to disagree with me, I have no problems with anyone reading it different, but this is just my personal feeling on the matter). It’s a narrative focusing on identity for someone who has never truly had the chance to become who he would have been if he had never had to be what others needed him to be. Phew… that was a weird sentence, lol. Anybody else got a knot in their brain now? ;)

And last but not least (though frankly I could write like 10 times as much as I already did since this is such a complex question) since you bring up the heart symbolism. I don’t mean to piss anyone off, but the heart symbolism as such has been surrounding Dean long before Castiel even came into the show (and it’s one of my favorite topics aside from “Dean as a christ figure” and I’ve written countless meta on that topic - I’m gonna leave a bunch of links to metas behind the cut at the end of this meta, for anyone who is interested in talk about heart symbolism, liberation, Amara and MoC arc etc. - some may even feature Deancas, but 95%  are just about Dean - it is by no means all I have written on the topic, but a good start), so to me - while I have no problem with people connect the heart symbolism in recents seasons to Castiel and Dean - they aren’t connected to another character at all, but are solely a symbol and metaphor for Dean as a character, because Dean’s heart has always been his biggest asset, but also what makes him so vulnerable. Dean is the “heart” of the show, as he serves as the PoV character. But most of all the heart symbolism surrounding Dean to me also belongs to the whole identity thread. It is also after all that Dean’s metaphorical death and re-emergence as a demon as a stepping stone to his liberation and coming of age (the healing part is still hopefully to come) is brought on by him dying by being stabbed through the heart…

http://dustydreamsanddirtyscars.tumblr.com/post/121901277911/this-is-easier-some-more-thoughts-on-the

http://dustydreamsanddirtyscars.tumblr.com/post/69379178845/dean-winchesters-heart-is-a-puzzle

http://dustydreamsanddirtyscars.tumblr.com/post/131476588721/11x02-form-and-void-shes-a-miracle

http://dustydreamsanddirtyscars.tumblr.com/post/98552189146/this-is-a-story-a-marvelous-story-full-of-love

http://dustydreamsanddirtyscars.tumblr.com/post/87629591461/go-right-ahead-put-a-blade-through-your

http://dustydreamsanddirtyscars.tumblr.com/post/67585667715/of-werevolves-tin-men-dean-winchester-and-his

http://dustydreamsanddirtyscars.tumblr.com/post/110615479616/dustydreamsanddirtyscarsdeans-physical-and

http://dustydreamsanddirtyscars.tumblr.com/post/66175602035/things-about-9x05-dog-dean-afternoon-3

http://dustydreamsanddirtyscars.tumblr.com/post/127498203661/the-original-serpent-3