#like in Prague I managed to get to the store before it closed at fucking 00:00

[will-ruadh]

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[fenweak]

Below the cut are 91 fics that feature Jonny and Patrick as creatures that lurk and prey (and snuggle) in the night. From wolfverses to fluffy animal transformations to love/sex magic. I've had such a great time re-reading all of these, as this pairing has been graced by so many amazing authors. Happy reading and happy Halloween!

★ are personal faves

Demons

a dainty dish to set before the king by mockturtletale ★ - demon!Kaner

But then the clocks strike midnight - clocks plural - and that’s weird as fuck, because the year is 2013 and Jonathan Toews doesn’t own any clocks that make that noise. He doesn’t own any clocks that make noise period.

Crossroad Blues by activevirtues- demon!Kaner

In which the demon Patrick Kane gives Jonathan Toews everything he's ever wanted.

Feathers by MJBadger - demon!Kaner, angel!Jonny

Not that Patrick has been snagging many souls or causing much in the way of mischief, lately. He supposes he should go out at some point and play a bit of catch-up. He assumes Jonny's been hanging out on park benches and saving jackasses left and right.

In which Jonny is an angel, and Patrick is a lazy demon.

Sweet and Tender Hooligan (or the post-apocalyptic au) by jezziejay - demon!Kaner

In which Kaner is a daemon of chaos, and Jonny is just trying to hold onto his city. Dystopian universe. Dark. Dark characterisation. A little TW, a litte GoT, and a little Patrick Ness. 

Together Burning Bright - demon!Jonny

Four times Jonny tried to eat Patrick's soul, and the one time he couldn't.

The Creek by mullsandmutts - demon!Kaner, angel!Jonny

Jonathan is a literal angel. Patrick is a literal demon (but with a sweet and kind heart -- it's complicated, okay?). They meet where their worlds are divided and existence might never be the same

Going West - not gonna spoil it but i love it

Jonathan finds the boy along the outskirts of a town market, chained to a post. There's a bronze armband clasped tightly on his forearm, winding around it like a snake, and he stares sullenly at the ground, heedless of Jonathan's gaze, while his toe traces patterns in the dust.

"I want him," Jonathan says to the vendor, pointing.

That's a lie.

Constant as a Northern Star - demon-hunter!Jonny, Pat is his safekeeper

The term "preux" was first used in the scripture that would become known as the Treaty of Avignon [signed in 1156, copies of the original - which was destroyed in the Siege of Harfleur in 1418 - are stored in Prague and Trondheim], marking not only the beginning of the working relationship between vampires and preux but also the use of a term to distinguish the preux from ordinary hunters.

(Or: Jonathan is a good fighter (it doesn't get more AU than this), Patrick waits for him,hates it and is a BAMF no matter the circumstances. Sharpy knows everything but doesn'tbetray anyone's secrets. He's a vampire, he has morals.)

Soulless by ice_hot_13 - demon!Jonny

Jonny used to have a soul.

Vampires

where the wild things are series by liketheroad - twilight AU

Seeing Johnny skate, Patrick realizes two things at the same time. One, Johnny is an incredibly gifted, terrifying hockey player, and two, Patrick is completely and irredeemably gay for him. Also, he’s definitely a vampire, but whatever, Patrick doesn’t really give a shit about that part. (Twilight AU)

Provenance by fourfreedoms ★ - vampire!Jonny  | sorta sequel here

“I uh, didn’t think it would be done so fast,” Patrick said when he arrived. Jonathan stared at him. “Done? You insult me. A good suit, at a lackluster slapdash minimum, needs three-fittings. You’ll be in here for four, I assure you.”

true blood chatfic by doctor_denmark - vampire!Jonny | not fic but still cute

So, sometimes hockey blogs say that Jonathan Toews's playoff fail-beard makes him look like a "victorian era vampire" (repeatedly), and when this happens, I start telling myself about the True Blood au, where Toews is the first vampire to play in the NHL, and Patrick Kane is the deeply closeted hockey player who falls in love with him. Then horrible enablers let me chat-fic at them for hours, and I end up with about 8,000 words, which is 9 times more than i managed on my thesis today.

I'm putting it here, because the world needs to witness my folly.

nature of the immortal being by Mayhem10 - vampire!Kaner

“Wait,” interrupts Jonathan, finally registering Patrick’s rant. “What exactly are you allergic to?”

Patrick waves dismissively. “You know, the usual.”

(In which Patrick is the worst vampire ever and Jonathan grows his own garlic.)

Sealed With A Kiss - (butt)vampire!Kaner

Five minutes after Coach Q explains to his new team that Patrick is indeed a supernatural creature of the night, he’s hustled into the corridor by his cute as hell new captain.

“An ass-eating vampire?” Jonathan asks.

“It’s not like I had a choice,” Patrick says, defensively.

bloodlust - vampire!Kaner 

One Time Patrick Kane Didn’t Drink From Jonathan Toews and Five Times He Did (also known as Vampire Kaner)

so say, what are you waiting for? by nuuclears - vamp!Jonny

“But are you even into this?” Patrick asks, biting his lip at how vulnerable it comes out.

Jonny straightens up fully and stares at him, hands full of gatorade bottles forgotten at his sides. “Kaner, it’s blood,” Jonny tells him incredulously, and ok, a valid point, Patrick does have some idea of how vampires get about blood, but still. It’s not like they’re just drinking from everyone either.

“And,” Jonny says, and blows out a harsh breath of air that he doesn’t even need. “And it’s you,” he admits, like it costs him something.

vampire!kaner AU by allthebros

He comes back to himself with Jonny’s blood in his mouth.

Werewolves 

All Practise and No Play by james - were!Kaner

Sometimes Tazer thinks it's like herding puppies. Actually, no, he thinks that all the time.

by the throat by liketheroad

The one where they're werewolves growing up in Manitoba.

Catalyst - were!Jonny

Full moon’s coming.

It’s about a week out, but even if they didn’t all keep a careful calendar of it, Patrick would know it just by looking at Johnny. Patrick’s known a few werewolves before, some distant family, and Johnny’s got all the hypervigilant aggression he’s used to seeing from them, but what they direct at others—bristling when people get too close, snapping when they’re provoked, showing teeth—Johnny turns inward.

fight or run, you're just getting older (podfic available by AshesandGhost) - were!Kaner 

Contrary to popular belief, weres don't actually need alphas. Patrick never had one, since he's the only person in his family with the gene, and his parents didn't push him into finding one. Alphas make their betas better; they keep them calm and level, they support them, they guide them. Without an alpha, betas are perfectly fine. They're just better with one.

Instincts (podfic available by exmanhater)

They don’t talk about what happens during the moon; and they don’t talk about how Patrick drives over sometimes to curl up on the couch and put his head in Johnny’s lap, jittery all over until he gets the anchoring weight of Johnny’s hand on the back of his neck; and they don’t talk about how Johnny calls him some nights and says, “Come over,” and Patrick does, because Johnny’s head is pounding with the need to get Patrick where he can see him, breathe in the scent of him, know he’s there and well. If they don’t talk about it they can just keep having whatever they need from each other; and that’s what they’ll do, because Johnny is Patrick’s alpha and Patrick needs him to be that for him.

For Johnny, it’s always been more.

I've Got A Feeling (I Hope You're Feeling It Too) by aohatsu - highschool werewolves AU!

When Patrick met Jonny for the first time, it was because they'd both just been picked for the same hockey team. When Patrick netted his first goal during practice, Jonny skated over to give him a congratulatory hug and, well, it's not like he didn't sometimes shift on accident, when he was excited or happy, but it hadn't happened at practice in ages.

Not Passive but Aggressive by reserve

Patrick Kane is a shitty werewolf; Jonathan Toews loves him anyway.

sun sweet berries of the earth series by gasmsinc -  were!jonny, forest spirit!kaner

There is a spirit living in Patrick State Park.

“Listen,” says Jonny. “I didn’t mean to step on your crown.”

The spirit’s bottom lip wobbles.

What If The Storm Ends ★

Here’s how it goes: Pat was out at a club, got bitten by a wolf—wtf?—got yelled at by Abby Sharp, woke up naked on her kitchen table, spent the day hiding in an IHOP, played the most aggressive game of hockey in his career and got mob-bossed off the ice by Sidney Crosby who, for the record, was surprisingly terrifying.

That was Tuesday.

wolf like me by gasmsinc ★ - were!Jonny

When Patrick had imagined his eighteenth birth year celebrations, he hadn’t imagined them taking place in a fortress a thousand miles away from home, surrounded by a people who were only his by marriage, while sitting next to a husband he barely knew.

He had imagined celebrating in Paelford Castle, right there in the great hall where his family had held every celebration, surrounded by the servants and nobles he had known his entire life, his parents and sisters on either side of him. He hadn’t imagined celebrating his eighteenth birth year on his wedding day, either.

Wolfverse by linsky - were!Patrick

Patrick has two goals for himself when he comes to Chicago: Win the Stanley Cup. And don’t let anyone find out he’s a wolf.

Ghost

Transcendence by ice_hot_13 - ghost!Jonny

Jonny shows up at midnight to play at the rink, and Patrick doesn't know who he is, what he's doing, or how the hell he even gets into the building, but Patrick still can't stay away.

If You Like It, Then You Should've Put A Ring On It - stepquietly

Tazer haunts Patrick through his TV and keeps threatening to kill him. And Kaner makes jokes about how Tazer lives at the bottom of a well and still uses a VCR. (The Ring AU crack!fic)

feel your heart beating as clearly as my own - ghost!Jonny

[He still doesn't get enough sleep most nights, and even though Jonny's there, he's notreally there, and he spends a lot of time sitting on the couch staring out the window,Jonny's hand clenched around his, like he's not sure what else to do.]

Jonny dies. Then he starts bothering Patrick.

the ghost & mr. kane - ghost!Jonny

"Uh," he starts. "You--if you're robbing me, you're not doing a great job of it."

"I'm not--I live here!"

"No you don't," says Patrick, dumb. "I live here."

"Yeah, I'm--I'm--I do too."

It snaps together for Patrick, suddenly--the guy's weird muttonchops, his suit, the way he disappeared and reappeared. "You're my ghost?" he asks. Just for confirmation, you know.

"Yes," his ghost says, glowering and still rusty-voiced.

as the ominous others

defrost, debauch, destroy by psocoptera (podfic by exmanhater)  ★ - ???

Beneath the ice, dread things lie dreaming. Or listening to One Direction, whatever.

thy hair soft-lifed by the winnowng wind by forochel ★ - leprechaun!Kaner

He made sure to lay out two saucers, one of spiked milk and one of pure whisky, that night; it was the closest to an apology he could think of.

Anatomy of a Hybrid series by maccabird_23 (abandoned WIP) - magical hybrid AU

Professional sports were chock-full of wolf and dragon hybrids; littered with adept humans but lean on the fairer hybrid. Most elves stayed to the more delicate athletics. Ballet and figure skating being the few sports they excelled at. Elves definitely didn’t play hockey. + Pat was many things but dumb wasn’t one of them. He knew how his teammates looked at him when he got worked up or even worst, turned on. He felt it deep in his gut and couldn’t control as the excitement, anger or arousal blossomed on his skin. Sparks of red and blue taking off from the tips of his pointy ears when he was happy. Deep reds gathering like coal along his scales when he was upset. His lips turning blistering silver before settling on frostbite red whenever he looked at Jonny.

bare those teeth to me please, man-eater - selkie!Jonny

 the one where johnny is a selkie, and patrick is the fisherman's son who loves him.

1988 selkie AU by allthebros - selkie!Jonny

They never give their skin willingly, his grandpa told him. You gotta either steal it and hide it away where they can’t find it, cause, believe it, first chance they got, they’re gone–doesn’t matter if they love you or if they have kids, they love and want the sea more. Or you gotta let them have their skin and let them go once the tryst is over. They don’t stay land-locked by choice, though they can still be happy and love like we do.

Patrick’s grandpa was a wise man, which is why it takes him more than a moment to understand what Jonathan is saying. “Take it, Patrick,” he repeats, his seal-skin all folded up between his strong hands. “I wanna stay.”

But You're So Magnetic by forochel - veela!Kaner 

Kaner comes into his veela heritage on his 24th birthday. Shenanigans and surprise feelings ensue.

call it magic by thundersquall ★ - faerie!Patrick

“It’s the faerie blood in me,” Patrick explains.

Jonny is just not equipped to deal with this shit.

OR, on March 17, Patrick turns into a faerie.

(Can't Help) Faun'in in Love by Miss_Psychotic - faun!Kaner 

When Jonathan is 12, he meets a boy named Kaner.

Crest and Break by hatrickane - mer!Kaner

 Kaner’s life in the deep is more than fulfilling - even despite his fascination with the fisherman who floats on the surface. He knows he has to keep his obsession a secret from the other Merfolk - but no banishment, magic, or legend is going keep him from getting closer to those kind eyes.

Friend Like Me by hatrickane ★ - genie!Jonny

 It wasn’t as beautiful as most oil lamps, Patrick surmised. It was a little stained, the ceramic chipped in places, but a meticulously crafted leaf sat nestled at the open mouth and Kaner dragged his fingertips over it.

It was warm, and he wanted it. Even without knowing what was inside.

First Frost by SimoneClouseau ★ - faerie (unseelie!Jonny)  

When he makes it to the party they ask him where he disappeared to an hour ago and Patrick stares back at them.

“What do you mean an hour?” he says. “It’s been ten minutes.”

Sharpy starts laughing. “Fine, don’t tell us.”

Patrick thinks maybe, just maybe, he’s going insane.

Patrick ends up somewhere he shouldn't be, and Jonathan is forced to claim him to save his life.

I want to meet the kind of folks I've never met by pistol_red - mer!Jonny

In which Johnny is tangled in a net and Patrick is the merman who saves him.

kiss the boy by gasmsinc - mer!kaner

The fish’s head is submerged completely under water. The only thing sticking out is the curve of its back, but Jonny can finally see why it’s stuck: there’s a fishing net hooked on a part of the rock.

It’s then that the fish decides to move again. Its tail thrashes back and forth wildly, and in its panic the fish bangs its broken fin right into the rock. A series of air bubbles pop up to Jonny’s right, but he doesn’t have time to acknowledge how weird that is, because three seconds after the bubbles, a boy’s head pops out of the water.

Jonny yells.

My Heart's in the Sea - Samantha_Holmes - mer!Jonny

When a mermaid named Jonathan saves a prince named Patrick from drowning, little did they know that their lives would be intertwined forever.

Animal Transformations

After Forever After by hockeyhawk ★ - angry frog!Jonny

One moment there was a captain. Next moment there was a frog. Someone has to step up, apparently it's Kaner.

The Hedgehog Can Never Be Buggered At All by forochel - hedgehog kaner

It’s a little known fact that the Kane family are in possession of a genetic quirk — an x-linked recessive gene — that basically boils down to this: Kaner turns into a hedgehog one day and gets stuck.

An Experiment In Hedgehog Physics by exmanhater - hedgehog!Kaner

Hedgehog!Kaner has the best ideas.

Hedgehog!Kaner series by altri_uccelli ★  - hedgehog!Kaner

Uhhhh, hedgehog Kaner in Switzerland.

+

Jon brings him up to his neck, cuddling him against the skin of his throat. He’s always done that, way back before everything. Even though it prickles, even though it gives him a light rash sometimes, he just likes Kaner there.

“Been awhile,” he whispers again.

+ A collection of ficlets and tagfic in the hedgehog!Kaner 'verse.

Better Off With You by tictactoews - hedgehog!Jonny 

Tazer has always seemed prickly on the outside, but he takes it to a whole new level when he turns into an actual hedgehog and becomes dependent on Patrick's care.

Changing on the Fly by mermaid - pitbull!Kaner

"Where's Kaner?" Jonny asks. "Where did this pit bull come from?" Duncs chews on his lip. "Uh, see, there's actually only one answer to both those questions."

Still muzzy with sleep, Jonny blinks at the guys. "So, like – Kaner got me a dog? And sent you two here to deliver it?"

"No," Sharpy says. "No, Kaner is the dog."

Duck Tales - duck!Jonny

“I think he needs floaties.”

Patrick resists the strong urge he gets to slam his head against the wall. “Kaner. He’s aduck; I don’t think they make floaties for them. What kind of duck can’t swim?”

“The kind that are magically transformed hockey players?” Kaner suggests and damn it, hehas a point.

Gone to the Dogs - puppy!Jonny

Jonathan Toews turns into a puppy. Then some other stuff happens.

Hooked on a Feeling (podfic available by exmanhater) - pug!Jonny

The one where Patrick is not exactly Bella Swan and Jonathan is definitely not Sparkly Whatshisname.

OR, THE WERE-PUG AU.

Into Each Life Some Rain Will Fall Like Cat Piss on Your Shoes by james - cat!Kaner

Johnny is waiting for Patrick to get home from Switzerland. What he gets is a surprise.

Slip the Jesses, My Love by flitterflutterfly - literally a hawk!Jonny

Jonny’s gets turned into a hawk and the only one he lets hold him is Patrick

The Cat Crept In by Celly1995 - kitten!kaner

Jonny's not entirely sure why he needed to get back to Chicago so urgently, because he *definitely* doesn't want to admit to himself that he's missing Patrick. But it's just as well he did come home, because Patrick's... not himself.

the skies are not cloudy - buffalo!Jonny

In which Jonathan Toews can turn into a buffalo, and Patrick Kane is the idiot in love with him.

Through the Looking Glass - puppy!Jonny, kitten!Kaner

The fic where Tazer becomes a puppy and Kaner turns into a kitten, but Sharpy still doesn't see any difference in how they behave.

To push a frozen rope - kitten!Kaner

It's just another day in the Blackhawks locker room when Patrick Kane decides to turn into a puppy.

you come around and the armor falls by altri_uccelli - puppy!Jonny

Patrick's in bed when he hears it, and at first it sounds like a peep that a phone might make, but then it happens again, elongated like a whine. His only theory is that it's a mouse, caught somewhere, and if Jonny's going to make a nuisance of himself by staying when he's not invited, he can damn well take care of this.

Bonus: IGAL 'verse by svmadelyn has an amazing tumblr tag that has ficlets and tag!fics with puppy!Tazer and doggo kids. Warning cuteness overload

Love & Sex & Magic

#1 Crush - sex magic

Patrick shows up at his and Jonny's hotel room under the influence of sex magic. 5000 words of porn ensues.

caring is creepy by liketheroad ★ - truth magic

When he gets out of the shower Johnny stares at him like Kaner’s the best thing he’s ever seen, which weirds Kaner out even more than the rest of this situation, because what, not even Johnny’s eyes can lie, now? This is some fucked up shit. Fucking Canucks fans, seriously.

 In which Tazer is truth whammied by a Canucks fan and it turns out he has a lot of feelings. Mostly about Kaner. But also about bacon.

Changing the Rules of the Game by Herwhereabouts - magic powers

Tazer has a concussion and is desperate to get better, while Kaner has healing powers he is unaware he possesses. Much drama ensues.

still into you by altri_uccelli - gender transformation

It's not even 12 hours after Jonny discovers he's a girl that he's sprawled on an itchy sofa, biting on his fist and being eaten out by Patrick Kane. He can't believe that a day exists in which having oral sex with Kaner, his oldest friend on the team and frequently a pain in his ass, is not the weirdest thing to happen.

A Handy Guide To Making You Feel Good by fourfreedoms and joyfulseeker - gender transformation

When it had first happened, body melting into this new form right there in front of all the guys, he’d demanded an answer from Jonny. “Did you see this coming?” A five first times fic.

+ ���Um…” Patrick says, staring at the water beading down over the curve of one breast and along his taut stomach.

“What?” Jonny asks, furrowing his brows.

Patrick finally gets the chance to lend a helping hand.

Hanging on a Moment of Truth - sex magic

As it turns out, the weird sex magic is the least of Kaner's problems.

i mingle with divinity by mockturtletale - lucky sex magic

“Hey,” Patrick says, putting his hand on Jonny’s thigh, feeling giving, “It’s totally us. You and me, we’re golden when our boners touch. It’s just what happens after that’s unnatural or whatever.”

roving eye ravenous by toomanyhometowns ★ - possession

He opened his mouth to start talking and blinked.

So Deep in My Heart (That You're Really a Part of Me) by kiwoa - bodyswap

"No way," Jonny says, and he slowly turns his - Kaner's - head from side to side, watching the muscles in his face and neck shift. He licks his lips; it tastes wrong. His left wrist feels too stiff and his legs and stomach look too skinny and his hair still itches, damnit. Jonny scratches the back of his neck with nails that are too long and uncomfortably ragged.

"Okay," he says slowly. "Okay, this is not good."

Symptomatic by snapple_jax - sex magic

“What, like it’s hard?” Jonny parrots along with Elle Woods. He side-eyes Patrick, fully prepared for the gleeful chirp about how he knew Jonny loved this movie all along.

Only Pat’s turned an alarming shade of red before scurrying to the bathroom, blanket trailing behind since he couldn’t untangle himself fast enough.

the gift of obedience - obedience magic

Patrick will be fine without Jonny. Really. All he has to do is track down Lucinda and get her to break the spell. He doesn’t even have to liberate an oppressed magical species or find true love along the way.

The Hug Offensive by ingenius - magic powers

When he's five, Patrick figures out that he has a super power. He thinks it's awesome.

under your skin by hazel - bodyswap

Patrick goes to bed that night in Tazer’s guest room. It’s not the first time he’s slept there, but it’s the first time he’s tried to sleep in Tazer’s body. His legs want to kick out weirdly into the corners of the bed, and his head can’t find a comfortable position on the pillow. He drops off eventually anyway, worn from the current of rage he’s been carrying around all day and the constant slow rhythm of Tazer’s heartbeat, drumming in his chest like a cage.

yours and/or mine by demotu - bodyswap

Jonny shows Patrick how it works. And by "it", I mean his dick. Jonny's, but temporarily Patrick's.

love is a contact sport by hazel and mermaid ★ - soul bond

"And the tragic reality of Patrick's life is that even though they broke up over a year ago, he and Johnny still play beautiful hockey together."

A high school AU, featuring dream-fish, bad movie dates, and a little bit of magic.

glory days by liketheroad - soul bond

He never expected his destiny to involve anything but hockey, never thought it would show up in flip flops, but when Patrick smiles at him across the locker room, quick and surprised, Johnny lets his priorities shift and change without a hint of reluctance or regret.

22 by aohatsu ★- soulmate

There’s no other explanation. His soulmate must have turned twenty-two yesterday.

more magical Realism and fantasy

say it with flowers by hazel ★

GOOD WORK, YOUNG HAWK, the oak tree outside his building booms once the season’s over, and Patrick smiles sleepily in its direction.

He's never been sure how the trees of Chicago know about hockey—trees hear a lot, but it's not like he's ever stopped in a public park to ask one about it.

The Purity Myth by downjune ★

Patrick Kane is a unicorn—the ferocious, foul-mouthed, man-hating kind.

these are the fables on my street by Fahye ★

Patrick makes a fucking superhuman effort, sweeps up the mess of his emotions, and stashes his incipient freakout about all of this somewhere in the back of his mind where he can have it later. When Jonny's back in the driver's seat, and Patrick's had a chance to bring up the whole blowjobs-and-beach-walks issue. Focused on the win, that's Patrick Kane.

Custos by hatrickane

The legend goes as this: The Sorcerer of Mount Custos, the guardian, serves as the protector of the farmfolk.

Patrick thinks it's bullshit.

I have as much soul as you (and full as much heart) by Mayhem10

Jonathan Toews was born with only half a heart. He didn't know that the other half existed, let alone that it was held by some irritating American named Patrick Kane.

A Magical Realism AU

May your past be the sound by elareine

After that, Jonny set some rules for himself.

1. No using his power for himself. That just looked like a slippery slope to him. Helping others was fine, though. 2. Consequently, no manipulating the outcome of a game, no matter how badly he wished to change the way he’d played. That would be unfair and undermine any victories. 3. No relationships with teammates. Not related to the time travel thing, but important enough to include in this list. Just because he could turn back time didn’t mean he had to create any more opportunities for a giant clusterfuck than necessary.

(Five times Jonny travelled back in time, one time he couldn't, and one time he chose not to.)

Like a Leaf That's Caught In the Tide by Frosting50

For more than 200 years the Toews men have been blamed for everything that’s ever gone wrong in the town of Pumpkin Hollow. Or the Practical Magic AU no one asked for.

bring it if you really want it by staraflur

It starts like this:

Well, okay, Patrick has no idea how it actually starts. But as pertains to him (in other words, the important part), it goes a little something like so: America, being a nation composed in large part of a melting pot of immigrants who may or may not have taken over land already owned by others using less-than-savory means, doesn’t have much of a magical national identity. Much less a magical continental identity. There’s no grand heritage going back thousands of years. Magical families home-schooled all their kids until, like, the 1800’s, and tough for the muggle-born, apparently. Hopefully you got noticed by someone who knew what to do with you before you got burned at the stake. Since you probably can’t control your powers, sport.

forget met (not) by hippietoews

“You're remembering him, aren't you?" Pat asks. Jon hums quietly.

After the battle with Pitch, Jon never talked about his memories. He didn't share anything about his previous life with the other Guardians. He knows that they have memories of their own previous lives, but they seem so unattached to them now.

Who they are now is what matters.

Long Way Home by tictactoews

Jonathan Toews is a young heir to the Winnipeg castle and estate, but this comfortable and sheltered life is not what he really wants. When circumstances force him to join a group of Grey Wardens - warriors dedicated to defend the world against monstrous enemies - Jonathan finds a new life and new friends, including two runaways from the neighboring country of Orlais, an old friend who's now back in his life, and a rogue elf who will come to mean more to Jonathan than he ever expected anyone could.

Dragon Age AU. No prior knowledge of the game necessary to read this story.Spoilers (if any) for Origins and Awakening.No spoilers for Inquisition.

the times i spent with you

"Pat plays Quidditch because not playing feels like dying. It's just that simple." Quidditch AU

through the mirrored maze

Jonathan's relationship with his daemon is different from anyone else's.

together again for the very first time by draftingletters

Like, seriously, this is the great fucking irony of Kaner’s life. You’d think it’d be pretty awesome, having powers of prophecy and all that, but all the dreams that end up coming true are so hideously fucking boring. It’s the perfectly natural normal dreams his brain spits out that are fucked up. The kind where he plays for the Ducks, or is a professional florist, or a neon green elephant. Or banging Tazer.

the walls kept tumbling down (in the city that we loved) series by altri_uccelli 

“Patrick wonders idly what Toews' daemon is; something like a python, maybe, or a bird of prey. It would just figure if it were a hawk, Patrick thinks in disgust; he's already starting to hate Toews a little so he tries to dial it back. Then he notices a big cat—some kind of, like, mountain lion—sitting well apart from the other daemons. It's watching the ice intently, and if Patrick had anyone to bet with, he knows where he'd put his money.”

+ fighting dragon remix ★ by altri_uccelli

A month ago, Jon thinks: a month ago he hadn't even heard of daemons, hadn't yet had his life turned upside down by a talking otter and a boy with dimples and the smoothest skin he'd ever touched and secrets held close behind long-lashed blue eyes.

world enough and time

The effect is instantaneous: Jonathan jerks forwards, gasping, and over the white-noise screaming his eyes are wide and frightened and fiercely alive. In that instant Patrick thinks, clear as a bell, god, he’s gorgeous. Fuck. (A Pushing Daisies AU.)

For fic inquires. Rec me a fic? Happy reading!

[fuck-customers]

Fuck managers – inappropriate behaviour towards part-timers

Disclaimer: I will not name the company I work at but I will say that the manager I'm talking about is also the one and only owner of the company. We do not have HR and I am too scared to submit an announcement for the authorities since it can't be done anonymously. I will put the key points in italics. TLDR at the bottom.

So I work at a bookstore, part-time while I'm in college. My contract ends on August 31st. In Prague, the bookstore has multiple branches and part-timers must know the system and details in all of them. We are underpaid (compared to other part-time jobs in the city, including other store-based jobs). We get our schedule from manager K., he hired us and we go to him with anything we need.

K. is a workaholic (it shows) and we get long shifts (8hr+, usually 12 hours). The law states we must get one 30-minute break after 4 to 6 hours at work. I have been yelled at by demanding this legally required break before (the girl that was supposed to replace me for the break so – that I wouldn't have to close – didn't show up). We are forbidden from having food or drinks at the register, which means we go 6 or more hours without any water, even in the heat of 30+ Celsius. We could go to the backroom to drink, but that would mean leaving the store and breaking another rule we have. The store can never be open and empty, with no employees in sight. (Luckily for me, most store managers are sane and don't mind us having water and snacks under the register, out of sight of the cameras, which the boss checks irregularly, and our customers.) We also have no chair and don't get to sit down all day long. A colleague of mine is close to needing a surgery due to her veins cracking. At the age of 21.

My contract explicitly states I will work at a shop, but I have been send to the main storage multiple times. After receiving a confirmation from my doctor, I told K. that I would only go to the storage if absolutely necessary because I have multiple allergies and asthma that got worse after my shifts in the storage. That was early July.

Since then, I have been send to the storage once. When I arrived, I was teased about arriving 10 minutes early. My first instruction from the manager was to dust and reorganize the books. The storage is 2 floors underground in the office building the management rents half a floor in and so K. is in the storage pretty often. It's also the lowest floor, dirty and dusty. My mold allergies act up every time. He handed me the rag saying it's a typical women's job. I repeat: He let someone he knew had allergies and asthma dust books in a closed environment while also managing to make a borderline sexist comment. Later on the same day, I received  a list of books that were to be relocated due to being only 1 of the edition (they take up space bigger packages need). They were to be put in a box under a desk. I was kneeling at the desk, putting the books into the box, and had my back turned to the manager. He was talking about how the store managers say I'm good but also kinda rude (he used a very specific word, meaning I wasn't rude to customers but would speak my mind regardless of who hears me, even when it was unwelcome, and would use a borderline rude way to do so. A word that is not common and usually used when talking about small children who talk back to their parents. For Czech speakers, he said: „ale prý jste taky pěkně hubatá“). At this point, he ran his hand through my hair. He touched me without consent while my back was turned to him, I was kneeling, and while the touch wasn't sexual, it was definitely weird, unwelcome and very, very inappropriate considering the circumstances.

And that's just a fraction of why I definitely won't sign a contract extension. I received a schedule for the next week and am supposed to go into the storage again. I will, but also texted back saying it's the last time I go there because I suppose it's necessary and nobody else can go. I was not very polite or respectful about it.

There is also this story going around about how a part-timer had a knee surgery – I like to use this story to illustrate the manager's attitude towards employees. The girl was willing to get back to work asap, but her condition required her to sit down anytime she could. So she told the boss she will go back to work as soon as she's released from the hospital, but she can't stand all day. Her suggestion was that if she gets a bar stool or a folding chair or really anything else to sit on, she'll sit down and get up when there's a customer at her register, so she won't help customers while sitting down. He fired her. Just like he did people who didn't like the treatment we get. And those who don't get fired get the worst shifts.

TLDR: Manager doesn't respect contract, legally required breaks or his employees. We are underpaid, have bad working conditions and I have been treated inappropriately by him before. He is known to fire people who stand up to him.