#like imagine them absolutely tearing it up to They Wanna Fuck at the gay club after two tequila red bulls under all the lights

[passiveagressivepoet]

cas would 10000000% love hyperpop and incredibly gay pop music i swear that man would love all of Slut Pop and would tear it up in the gay club to his gay little bangers

[shadowofmytime]

>> some of my absolute favorites ! like and reblog if you save and enjoy ! happy reading and give some kudos to these amazing writers ! always feel free to send me some of your favorites ! ! <<

>> There is a bit so for your convenience they are in alphabetical order ! The ‘s’s are some of my all-time favorites ! ! <<

>> min yoongi x park jimin <<

All the seasons of your love - 5k+ [college au]

The movement in the library was still slow in the first week, so Yoongi could easily remember the few people who came by. That's why he pays so much attention to a certain dark-haired freshman who walks in on a Wednesday afternoon - or at least that's what he tells himself. He goes over to the front counter and asks Yoongi for directions to the Economy 101 session and, God, his voice is as sweet as his eye-smile.

Or how librarian Yoongi fell head over heels for cute freshman Park Jimin who, unfortunately, was very much straight - or so Yoongi thought.

Bon Voyage - 47.9+ [tourist! au]

Yoongi was meant to be taking the trip of a lifetime with his boyfriend. But now he's in Paris, alone and miserable. That is until he collides - quite literally - with one Park Jimin.

Boys who talk shit - 26k+ [college au]

When Yoongi enrolled in BTS (aka Boys who Talk Shit) Boarding School, he wasn't really expecting to be the only 'straight' (to be read sarcastically) guy in a room of seven geniuses (aka children aged five to ten, honestly). Plus four pet spiders. Yes, plural.

Chaotic episodes in A Place of Love and War, where Yoongi learns all about True Love via Park Jimin, Music and Marriage. Sort of. Brain bleach and earplugs are strongly recommended.

Conflicting arrangement - 162k+ [fake boyfriend au]

"Absolutely not," Yoongi deadpanned. "Namjoon-ah. I value you as a friend, and I think I'd even go as far as to say that you're my best friend, but absolutely fucking not."

"You owe me," Namjoon pleaded. "Come on, Yoongi, it's not a big deal."

"Your boyfriend's best friend's best friend needs a fake boyfriend to come out to his family this Chuseok, all the way in fucking Busan," Yoongi repeated drily without pause, making Namjoon wince. He flipped a page of his textbook, picking up his highlighter. "Not a big deal, Namjoon. Amazing."

Cotton Candy - 240k [high school rock band]

"He could get used to sitting next to Yoongi like this. To have him around. To have the band around. To smile and feel happy. To see Yoongi sitting in front of an instrument and having him play just for him.

'If this was my happy ending,' Jimin thinks, resisting the urge to lean his head on Yoongi's shoulder, 'if I wasn't who I am, I'd just let you have me whenever you want. You could have me anytime.'"

As spring turns into summer, school band Cotton Candy unexpectedly loses its singer and the members are forced to look for a new vocalist. Six boys find one in the form of the promiscuous pink-haired boy Park Jimin who makes a home in their hearts and finally finds a place he belongs

Daegu drift - 53k+ [motorcyclist / playboy au]

Jimin stops in Daegu for a big motor show and gets caught up with the locals. Specifically one Min Yoongi.

Sneak Peek:

Yoongi has his arms folded as he stares Jimin down.

“Are you going to join the rally, or not?”

Jimin takes his time answering because he likes the way Yoongi is looking at him. “Sure. I guess it could be fun. But you do realize none of you have a chance against a Bugatti, right?”

“It’s not the car that wins the race,” the other man says. “It’s the driver. You could have the fastest, best-equipped car in the goddamn universe, but if you’re a shit driver, it doesn’t make a difference.”

Goodbye from lonely - 65k+ [uncle yoongi!]

Park Jimin works two jobs that he loves and is going to college to get his teaching degree.

Min Yoongi is a personal assistant who hates his job and spits in his boss' coffee every day.

Kim Taehyung has been infatuated with his clueless co-worker for the better part of a year.

Jeon Jeongguk has a three-year-old daughter that he'd do anything for.

Somehow the tiny human brings them all together.

Or

Tae is in love with Kookie -> Kookie's daughter takes Jimin's ballet class -> Yoongi is Kookie's stepbrother -> Jimin and Yoongi meet because of Kookie's daughter.

In your eyes (it’s where I wanna be) - 5.5k [coffee shop! au]

Jimin pauses with his marker inches away from the cup, because — is he really going to do this? Isn’t it a bit old-fashioned to write something flirty on a coffee cup? But no matter what his churning gut says about the danger and what the hell are you doing do you want to die, this guy is — with no better way to put it — totally Jimin’s Type with a capital T.

(Or: Jimin accidentally starts a nickname war with the cute blonde who likes his coffee way too bitter.)

Inked flowers - 6.4k [tattoo artist / florist au]

Something stopped him. A sound of a piano. He looked around and saw a light coming from the window on the other side of the street. On the third floor was an open window. A light and the sorrowful sound of a piano flew out of the room. Jimin looked closer and saw a figure or at least a top of someone's head.

The melody was so sad and sorrowful that Jimin wanted to cry. He started thinking, what could possibly go inside that person’s head? What were they thinking? Jimin just hoped that they weren’t sad and alone.

(let me see you) get high then low - 4k+ [photographer/model au]

"The light-haired model is the kind that fascinates Yoongi, and at the same time, he prefers to steer away from. He's all smiles and flowers, drawing you in with his cuteness until he's not anymore. Suddenly, he’s something else entirely; he's that false calm, the ocean that looks smooth on the surface but will drag you down to its depths if you dare to touch it."

or

Min Yoongi works in a photography studio with some (very questionable) friends that can't get any work properly done without making a bit of a fuss.

Park Jimin is a model handcuffed against his will and bored. Also a little bit horny, maybe.

Math Tutor - 11.7k [bad boy! yoongi]

Min Yoongi is the school's resident Bad Boy™. He's covered in tattoos, is pierced, curses like a sailor, smokes like crazy, doesn't give a shit about anything, possesses a hot temper that has people steering clear of him, and is desperately in love with Park Jimin, the adorable math nerd. When Jimin is tasked with tutoring Yoongi in math, who is in danger of failing the class and being held back a year, both boys are hesitant. Yoongi because he can't think straight around the boy with startling red hair, and Jimin because Yoongi is scary as hell and looks like he can easily kill someone. Gradually, though, the two grow closer, and Jimin finds that Yoongi is nothing like how he'd imagined.

Maybe I hate you can be our always - 35.9k [enemies to lovers]

When Yoongi thinks about it, really gives it genuine thought, it's possible that Park Jimin isn't the worst person in the world.

//

(Or, Yoongi and Jimin get off on the wrong foot.)

Ode to yoonmin - 4k+ [texting]

yoongi and jimin are in very much in love but they're the only ones who don't know it

OR

chat fic with a bunch of bad jokes and memes ¯\_(ツ)_/

Out of my system - 101.6k+ [one night stand]

Yoongi likes one night stands and he understands how they work. What he doesn’t understand, however, is how he ended up in bed with a probably-not-legal kid crying in his arms about his broken heart, because he’s pretty sure (and correct him if he’s wrong) that a babysitting job was not what he was looking for when he went to the opening of his friend’s new club

Standing on the brink of 376 - 42.9k+ [street racing]

When Taehyung woke him up at three AM to go to a street race—an illegal one, no less—claiming it would help his social anxiety, Jimin never actually expected it to do much for him, except maybe make him cry hysterically. He found that he really wasn't too far off-kilter with that assumption, but it was only after he'd suffered through countless bouts of insecurity that he realized, hidden behind each stuttered breath, every inevitable tear, every spark of unavoidable fear, and even the customary cloud of cigarette smoke itself, lay a tremendous amount of affection for a certain platinum haired street racer that he can't even begin to justify. But when his opinion of fact, fate, and even life itself continues to blur with each push of the gas pedal, he thinks he just might be able to forgive himself for falling in love with a criminal, when the nonsensical moonshine of the present mutes the anxiety that had been a constant within his heart up until this November.

Strawberry lube - 82.7k+ [college au]

Yoongi remembers little to nothing of their crazy drunken night out. But of two things he's absolutely sure, one: he's not gay, two: he just slept with Park Jimin

The Paradiso Lounge - 192k+ [photographer/stripper au]

“Do I have to pay you for that service?”

This isn’t a dream (let me love you) - 26k+ [highschool au]

As captain of his high school’s basketball team, Min Yoongi dedicated all of his attention to his team and their games. His focus on the game never waned, not once for anything or anyone.

Well, until head cheerleader Park Jimin flashed his abs during a solo cheer and made him fuck up his shot

Trying to Behave (but you know we never learned how) - 329k+ [non-idol! au]

It's been years since Yoongi's last seen him and the younger boy is a shell of his former self in a way that makes his heart twist in his chest. And yet, after all this time and countless days of convincing himself to let him go, he's still unconditionally, head over heels in love with Park Jimin.

(Jimin and Yoongi grow up together.)

Valentino Summers - 657k+ [‘80s gangsters]

Whether or not Jimin was smuggling drugs really didn’t matter. He was hustling, and these days that was all there was to it.

Hustle and survive or struggle and die.

Y/N masterlist  << check it out !! xoxo

[angelic-holland]

Uncool // th x fem!reader

Summary: You broke things off with Tom, it broke your heart, but you had to. He’s been trying to make his peace with your decision but he can’t and needs to confront you. 

Part of my Drive North series. One shots based off of each song from the SWMRs album Drive North, find the rest of the one-shots here. Listen to the song Uncool while reading. 

Warnings: lots of angst

Word Count: 3.2k

He was drunk, and sad, and Harrison tried to tell him not to go out tonight, knowing you’d be there, knowing you’d run into him if he went out, and he would lose it. Things happen, people change. Tom didn’t think he’d changed, he was just busier than he was when you first started dating. You missed him so much when he wasn’t there, you missed him as he left for longer and longer, the time of your phone calls and distance between your texts increasing every time he left. You didn’t know how to be in a relationship with someone who was never around.

Eventually, about two weeks ago before he left for reshoots of Endgame you broke things off. You told him you didn’t love him anymore, you told him you couldn’t pretend to love him anymore. And he was a wreck. Even being with the men he looked up to couldn’t cheer him up at the end of the day. He would go back to his trailer and cry about you, which led to him coming back home after reshoots with the sole idea of moving on. That’s why he was at the club, getting drunker than he should, hoping to meet a pretty girl to make his problems go away.

“Tom, maybe cool it with the beers, you’re pissed,” Harrison observes and Tom rolls his eyes.

“Shut up Haz, you’re not my mum,” Tom says, sitting up on the stool.

“Tom, I’m just looking out for you, is this really the place you want to be? What if she’s working tonight?”

“Nah, it’s Thursday, she never works on Thursdays.”

“Tom I-,” Harrison starts but the opening tune to a song cuts him off as Tom slams his bottle against the bar.

“Why do they always play this stupid fucking song? It’s her song, I don’t wanna fucking hear it,” Tom grumbles as the Lemon Song by Led Zeppelin plays.

***

You decided to take another shift at the club, it would help pay off next month’s rent and save a little towards your vacation fund. Your friend really needed the night off so it wasn’t a problem. You got to the club, tossing on your apron, hoping to get good tips as you made your way to the bar, Brick, the DJ seeing you and queuing your song. It was something that they did every night, playing the favorite song of whoever was working the bar, give them something to look forward too before their long shift.

You notice a very drunk person at the end of the bar, motioning with his beer bottle before slamming it on the counter. You almost walk right up to him to tell him off before you realize who it is.

“What the fuck is he doing here?” You ask your bar partner, Alexis.

“Fuck if I know, he said fuck me up and got like four shots of vodka before moving on to beer. His friends been trying to cut him off but it’s not working.”

“Fucking idiot,” you mumble meeting Harrison’s eyes. He shakes his head and you nod, not planning on going anywhere near the two of them for as long as you could.

You went through the night, serving different people, cutting a few people off, your back to Tom as much as possible. When it was time for Alexis to leave you gave her a hug. As the night drew later and the club was near closing there were few people still hanging out at the bar. Most were dancing or on their way out.

Tom, to your absolute chagrin was still sitting at the end of the bar with Harrison.

You give a last call, hoping he doesn’t recognize your voice but it’s too late, he turns and noticed the red streaks in your hair, standing up and stumbling towards where you stood at the other end of the bar, getting another man his last beer.

“Hey, hey Y/N,” Tom slurs and you finally turn to face him.

“Hi Tom,” you say, giving Harrison a look, trying to tell him to get them out of here.

“You know, this is the first time I’ve seen you since,” Tom says, sitting down in front of you, “the first time I’ve seen you since the night before the morning you told me you didn’t love me and you were gone.”

“Tom, let’s not talk about this here,” you whisper, watching Randy, the bouncer from the corner of your eyes as Tom’s voice steadily increased.

“No, I think we should, I think I deserve to know, why, why you stopped, why you don’t-,” he couldn’t get the words out, his hands rubbing his eyes as he sniffled.

“Tom, come on why don’t you let Harrison take you home? Sleep it off?”

“No, I, I wanna know Y/N, please,” he looks up at you, tears in his eyes.

Fuck, you were going to have to talk about this eventually.

“Tom, just, go, okay? I don’t know what else to tell you,” you say, turning away from him to start putting away the glasses you had already cleaned. The only ones not clean were the one in his hand and the one the guy at the end of the bar was drinking from. You’d be able to get out relatively quickly tonight.

“You don’t know what else to say?!” His voice louder, the music lower and lower in the background.

You ignore him, wiping down the rest of the bar and taking the glass from the guy at the end of the bar, thanking him for the tip as he leaves.

“Tom, come on, time to go,” Harrison says as Tom pushes the glass away.

“Come on Y/N, talk to me, please, I need you to talk to me,” he’s crying now, you can hear it as your back is turned towards him, cleaning the glasses. You squeeze your eyes shut, trying to calm your rapid heart beat.

“Y/N,” Randy says; walking towards you and the pair of boys.

“Hey Randy,” you say, turning back towards Tom.

“Everything okay?” He asks and before you can answer Tom turns towards him, mumbling like an idiot.

“Everything is great Randy, is Randy your new boyfriend Y/N? Who’s Randy?”

“Randy, is the bouncer, and I want you to leave,” Randy says, crossing his arms.

“It’s fine, I’m almost done I’ll walk them out,” you say, grabbing Tom’s glass and cleaning it.

“You sure Y/N?”

“Yes, thank you Randy.”

He nods but doesn’t leave until you had finished wiping down the counter, pulling off your apron and grabbing your purse and tips.

“Come on drunky, let’s get you home and sober,” you say, as you follow Harrison’s lead, leaving out the back door so no paparazzi would catch the group of you leaving.

“You got a car?” Harrison asks and you nod, unlocking your car and Harrison helps Tom into the backseat, who’s mumbling about you and him and maybe something about Spiderman, and Randy, lots of half thought out questions about Randy.

“Tom, Randy is gay and I don’t have a boyfriend,” you say starting the car.

“But, you, I-,”

“His job is to make sure there aren’t any drunk off their ass club goers trying to hit on me or in your case scream at me.”

“I wasn’t screaming,” Tom starts and Harrison cuts him off.

“Yeah, Tom, you kinda were,” Harrison says, shaking his head.

“Oh shut up Harrison,” he mumbles, crossing his arms like a child.

“Tom, listen, let’s get you home and sober and we can talk okay?”

“Don’t wanna talk to you,” Tom grumbles.

“Jesus fuck Tom, you were just complaining that you wanted to talk to me,” you roll your eyes as you drive out of the parking lot.

“I don’t wanna talk to you, wanna give you a piece of my mind.”

“Okay Tom, you can give me a piece of your mind as well.”

You ride in silence for the most part, Tom mumbling every so often as you pull into the parking garage of your apartment building.

“Alright, up,” you say as Harrison helps Tom out of your car and into the building.

***

Tom was laying on your couch, holding a trash bin while you and Harrison stood in your kitchen. Your roommate was at her boyfriends so you had the place to yourself.

“You know, Y/N, he literally doesn’t shut up about you. Hasn’t shut up about you since you broke up with him right before he left. That was cruel,” Harrison whispers, watching as Tom rolls around on your couch.

“Harrison, I, you know why I broke up with him. You know that I didn’t have a choice.”

“But you did, if you cared you would make it work.”

“I, I don’t need to explain myself to you.”

“Yeah, you need to explain yourself to him. He still doesn’t understand why you cut off all contact with him.”

“It was stupid okay? I’m not gonna lie, I thought cutting ties would hurt less.”

“And in return it hurt like way worse than you could’ve imagined?”

“Yeah…”

“Listen, he needs to drink some Gatorade, sober up, then you should tell him why, really why. Because he’s not stupid, but he thinks you don’t love him because that’s what you said.”

“I don’t think he wants to hear a word I have to say.”

“Maybe, but you should listen to him. He needs someone to listen to him. He needs you to listen to him.”

“Okay,” you nod, grabbing a cup from your cabinet and pouring some Gatorade into it.

“Tom? Buddy, we’ve got you something to drink,” Harrison says as you bring the cup into the living room.

“No, no more alcohol,” Tom whines, his hand reaching out to swat it away.

“Not alcohol, just Gatorade, come on, drink a little,” Harrison says as you put the cup on the coaster in front of him.

Harrison takes a seat on the chair next to the couch and you sit leaning against the coffee table by Tom’s head, watching as he shakily brings the cup to his lips.

You sit in silence as he drinks, struggling to keep his hand steady.

“Y/N, did I ever tell you how pretty you look tonight? Randy is a lucky guy,” Tom slurs.

“Jesus fucking Christ Tom, Randy has a boyfriend! He’s gay!”

“Oh, you know, you used to have a boyfriend. It was me, I was your boyfriend,” Tom mumbles putting the cup down.

“Just, try to relax, get sober.”

“No.”

“No? No you’re not going to try to get sober?”

“No, because I know I won’t be able to tell you what I want to tell you if I’m sober.”

“Tom, I think you should wait, clear your head, get a little sober before you say anything, don’t wanna say something you’ll regret,” Harrison says.

“What? Could I say something as bad as she did?” Tom says, jutting his finger out at you.

“Harrison, it’s okay, I probably deserve it,” you say, remembering when you left him.

****

“Tom, I’m sorry, I, I can’t do this anymore,” you say, pulling away from him.

“What, Y/N, darling, what do you mean?”

“I, I don’t love you anymore Tom.”

“What? Darling what did, where did this come from? I thought we were good, we were good, I thought we were good,” Tom keeps repeating.

“We aren’t, we weren’t, I don’t, Tom, don’t make me say it twice.”

“No, I don’t believe you, after everything, after all this time, you, you don’t love me anymore?”

“Yes Tom, I- I don’t love you anymore.”

“I’m-, I’ve got a fucking plane to catch, can’t we talk about this later? You, just wait, I’ll be back in two weeks, we can talk about it then.”

“What’s there to talk about? Tom, I don’t love you like I used to, I’m sorry, there’s, there isn’t anything you could do. There’s no fixing this.”

“No, no, no, Y/N, don’t go, please don’t go.”

“I’m sorry Tom.”

****

“You, you just, you didn’t answer my calls. You just, you vanished Y/N, you told me you didn’t love me anymore and you disappeared. How was I supposed to feel? You didn’t even explain yourself. You never told me why you didn’t love me.”

“Tom I-,”

“No, I’m talking, shhh,” he says, his finger pressing to his lips to shush you.

“Okay,” you shake your head.

“And we were dating for two years, we’ve been through so much, you were there for me, cheering me on at my premieres, you would kiss my nose and say ‘love you dork’ every night before we went to bed. And you mean to tell me that you just stopped loving me? Just out of the blue just like that? Because that’s bullshit Y/N. I fucking love you so much. I followed your footsteps into a fucking murder scene.”

“A what now?”

“Shhh, it’s a figure of speech. But you know, even though I love you, I don’t wanna be your fool, I don’t wanna love you if you’re not gonna love me back.”

“Tom, please let me explain-,”

“Explain what? How you told me you don’t love me and then left me after we spent the night together, after I told you I could see us growing fucking OLD TOGETHER?”

“Tom,” you felt tears prickle your eyes but you blinked them away.

“And I thought that, you know, I want to try to fix this, want to try to understand what went wrong, because I believe in us, you know. Talked a lot to Robert about what happened. You know what he told me?”

“What?”

“That if you loved me as much as I love you, you’d find a way back to me, you’d make it work, because that’s what you do for people who you love.”

“But Tom why should I have to sacrifice everything that I have here, why am I the only one sacrificing something?” You say, your voice rising.

“What?”

“Why should I be the one to fight to make it work? Why should I have to bend over backwards to visit you when you’re filming, to text you or call you at odd hours when I know you won’t fucking answer? Why am I the only one sacrificing my life here?”

“Because!”

“Because WHY?!”

“What do you have here to sacrifice? You, you’ve got a job yeah but not like you’re in college, you don’t have a family, what do you have here that would stop you from making it work?”

“Wow, just wow Tom, what the fuck? You know, you fucking know that I don’t like to talk about my childhood, about the foster homes, the fact that my mum abandoned me when I was a baby, everything, and you’re gonna use that against me? Low fucking blow,” you say, wiping a tear from your cheek.

“Tom…” Harrison starts.

“No it’s fine. I deserve it. What else Tom? Got anything else you can make me feel like shit about?”

“No, Y/N, that’s not what, I didn’t mean it like that,” Tom mumbles.

“Oh? How’d you mean it? I mean yes I never went to college, school wasn’t for me, you fucking know that, school wasn’t for you either, so no I don’t have a traditional job. Neither do you.”

“No, I just meant, I meant that-,”

“And you know what? You wanna know why I told you I didn’t love you?”

He opens his mouth to say something but you ignore him cutting him off.

“I fucking knew it would be too hard, to explain everything I was feeling, everything that piled on top of each other throughout the past few months. You would be gone, months at a time, and I’d go out of my way, staying up to video call you, texting you, waiting, fucking waiting for you to respond. You’d tweet, you’d post on Instagram, but you couldn’t fucking respond to a text? You just, you stopped putting in effort, so I gave up, why should I have to put in an effort, when you didn’t give a fuck? I thought you didn’t love me anymore. And I knew, I knew the only way to break this off, to get you to give up on me would be to tell you I didn’t love you, because I figured you felt the same way.”

“I, I should’ve made more of an effort to respond. I was just so busy, why do you fucking blame me for not responding to stupid texts?”

“Oh yes your girlfriend checking in on you, telling you that she got a raise, telling you she misses you, fucking stupid right?”

“That’s not what I meant.”

“Saying an awful lot of things you don’t mean tonight huh?”

“Yeah you wouldn’t know what that’s like,” Tom mumbles.

“What?”

“Saying stuff you don’t mean.”

“Oh yeah? And why’s that?”

“Because you don’t love me, because no matter how much I want you to, you don’t, not really.”

“Are you, are you fucking kidding me Tom? You know who made an effort to talk to you while you were gone? Me. Who always started the video calls? Me. Who always started the phone calls? Me. Who always made sure to plan their entire day around you so you could talk them for all of five seconds? Me. But right, I don’t love you.”

He’s silent, you look up, his eyes watching your face carefully.

“You know, Tom, Y/N, I think Tom should get a little more sober, then you guys can talk about this like adults,” Harrison pipes up.

“No, you know, if you actually wanted to make an effort, you would’ve taken me up on my offer, you would’ve come with me, you’d travel with me, you’d let me take care of you,” Tom says, sitting up.

“Tom, that’s not, that’s not what I want, I, you know that I’m not comfortable with you spending money like that on me. To fly me places, shit like that. I just-, fuck Tom you know that’s a weak spot for me.”

“Why? Because you don’t think you deserve it? Sweetheart you deserve every last cent I fucking have, and I’d gladly give it to you.”

“You don’t- you wouldn’t understand. You’ve never had to live paycheck to paycheck. You’ve never had to go to school hungry, you’ve never had to worry about when your next meal was, or where your new home would be because your foster family didn’t want you anymore. You don’t get it, money isn’t something I’m used to.”

“I wanted to help you get used to it, I know you don’t like when I spend money on you but I want to, want to help you learn that money is a good thing and I’m able to use it to make other people feel good.”

“Tom, I never asked for that.”

“I know, I know and that’s why I want to give you it, wanna give you the fucking world, because that’s what you deserve.”

“No, I don’t.”

“God, I don’t know how to get it through your fucking skull, always so fucking stubborn.”

“Shut up.”

“When did you stop?”

“Stop what?”

“Stop loving me, when did you fall out of love with me?”

“Tom, I never stopped loving you, you fucking idiot.”

“You sure?”

“God, and I’m the stubborn one.”

“So you still love me?”

“Yes, I love you dork.”

[loplainlointhemorning]

can i get some gay classics recommendations?

I don’t particularly read like, LGBT books bc I kinda just read whatever I end up with, but I do watch tons of LGBT films so I’ll hit u with that.

1. My Own Private Idaho, a brilliant film, one of my favorites. The main character is a gay man(I intend to give u the specific orientations of the main characters in case u want some specific representation) and deals with themes of abuse, abandonment, mental illness, unrequited love, homelessness, etc.

2. Brokeback Mountain- The “gay cowboy movie”, the two main characters are gay men trying to uphold a relationship in(I believe?) 50’s rural America. broke my heart mountain

3. Pink Narcissus- One of those art films with no plot. I saw a terrible copy while half asleep & on meds and it still blew my mind with how beautiful it was. the main character is a cute twink and I kin him.

4. Velvet Goldmine- My favorite movie of all time, there really is no main character but all of them are LGBT. It has huge bisexual representation, it’s beautiful beautiful beautiful, it’s partially based on the lives of David Bowie, Lou Reed, and Iggy Pop. Half the script is Oscar Wilde quotes.

5. Kill Your Darlings- A pretty innacurate but fun none the less movie about the beat poets(Kerouac, Ginsberg, Burroughs) centering mainly on Ginsberg. Everybody is fucking gay. I love it.

6. Shortbus- Directed by John Cameron Mitchell and uh, filled with porn, I haven’t seen the whole thing but I respect it so much bc it’s campy and everyone’s homo and it’s a ride. Literally.

7. Liquid Sky- Canon bisexual characters, plays seriously with gender, will make u feel so valid as a genderqueer person, weird plot, GREAT clothes, I love Anne Carlisle.

8. The Runaways(2010), a biopic abt the all girl band The Runaways. Bc the characters are teens and it kinda deals w them dealing w repressed bisexuality I think it’s really important for teen girls to watch. It meant a lot to me.

9. Trainspotting/Trainspotting 2: Neither Of these r explicitly gay but Renton is coded bisexual and he & Sick Boy are practically married by the end of the 2nd one so. Really makes u wanna shave ur head.

10. Desert Hearts- Adorable lesbian movie abt two gays in the desert. Really sweet, really poignant, Cay is SO cute, and I loved the whole thing.

11. Women In Revolt- Two of the main characters are bi, Candy is straight.....? Maybe they’re all bi. I have no idea. Not v important. It’s an Andy Warhol movie & the three main characters r played by trans women(Candy Darling, Holly Woodlawn, Jackie Curtis), all three of whom have ended up being pretty major in LGBT history. Aside from that they’re just really cool girls, especially Candy, who’s my favorite of course. This movie is hilarious and fun and the ending is stellar and I think a very good representation of accidental brilliance.

12. Some Of My Best Friends Are...- Candy is in this one too and gives, no doubt, one of the most moving performances I’ve seen in any film ever. It’s centered around a gay club at New Years(I think? May be Christmas, it’s been a while since I’ve seen it) and it’s just. She’s the best part but all of it is fascinating. Major trigger warning for trans violence though.

13. Aimee and Jaguar- Absolutely fucking heartbreaking but one of the most compelling wlw films I’ve ever seen in my life. Takes place in Nazi Germany- A relationship between a Nazi sergeants wife and a Jewish woman. You can imagine how it ends.

14. Fried Green Tomatoes- I FUCKING LOVE THIS MOVIE AND THE BOOK IS EVEN BETTER. Bisexual/Lesbian relationship, not explicit in the film but explicit in the novel. However you can still tell they’re gay in the film so, not that bad. Takes place in 1920’s Alabama so there’s a lot of racial stuff to sit through obviously. I don’t know if you’re in the mood to deal with that, so.

15. The Color Purple- This movie messed me up for two whole days, I read the book and it didn’t affect me half as much. It’s beautiful. A lesbian relationship between two black women in the South in I believe the 1910’s, though the relationship isn’t even as important as what’s going on in the foreground. The ending is happy though and that’s a change. It just tears you up but it has the decency to fix itself, I only ever saw it once a year ago but I’m desperate to see it again.

16. Hedwig and the Angry Inch- this movie saved my life when I was 14 and has such a fascinating story regarding gender, it’s kind of short but it’s packed with JAMS(it’s a musical) and Hedwig Robinson is my real mom. I don’t wanna spoil anything but yeah, trans rock diva from Germany tells her tale, just watch it.

17. Wilde- Biographical film abt Oscar Wilde. Watch it. Inhale it.

18. Orlando- I read the book for this one too but I prefer the movie!! More cool nb gender shit!! I love it!! Watch it!! Tilda Swinton kisses some Russian chick and it’s wild!! Best thing ever. Roll with it.

19. Two Of Us- Ok so I know it’s not cool to like The Beatles rn but uh, if you do like them, this is a film about John Lennon and Paul McCartney that speculates on a visit between them after the Beatles broke up. It’s. So gay. Paul makes John cry by telling him he’s beautiful. John kisses him in an elevator as a “”””joke””””. I LOVED it when I was 14 and I recently rewatched it, very entertaining.

[patton-croc-agenda]

The 5 Stages of Having a Crush

A/N: This is based off @the-pastel-peach‘s High school AU! Please check them out! God I love cheerleader Patton! If I weren’t so gay I would probably sweep him into my arms (actually scratch that I will platonically sweep him into my arms because I love he).

Words: 3,476

Pairings: Pining Logicality with side pining Prinxiety 

Warnings: Swearing, lightly implied sexual humor, lots of pining

“For the last time, just ask him out like a normal human being!”

That was what Logan had said to Virgil three days ago, because that was the obvious answer to Virgil’s weird obsession with Roman Prince. Ask him out, actually go on a date. That way they could find if they were compatible and therefore they would either continue to date until eventually marriage and/or copulation or they would realize they were not compatible and break up. Simple.

Well, to put it bluntly, Logan from three days ago was a fucking idiot.

It wasn’t necessarily his fault, because Logan from three days ago hadn’t yet seen met Patton Foster. Well, met was a strong word. Logan from three days ago hadn’t yet seen Patton Foster do the goddamn splits multiple times in his stupid cheer outfit. In fact, Logan from three days ago had yet to even attend a single event where the cheer squad was present, as he found watching sports rather dull and had been able to skip most prep rallies in order to get in some extra studying.

So yes, watching Patton Foster do a cheer routine for the first time was not easy on one’s heart. That had to be all it was, though. The fact of the matter was that every person in the whole school loved Patton with a burning passion. Logan had been the exception, but he supposed this was an inescapable scientific fact that pertained to everyone, no exceptions.  

That was how Logan found himself laying in his bed, staring up at his ceiling contemplating his stupid, illogical feelings. He groaned and pressed his palms over his eyes, causing his glasses to slip off onto the pillows. He looked up at the now blurry stars that he had put up about five years ago with Virgil’s help. He smiled softly at the memory, wondering if Virgil could help him with this situation too.

Picking up his phone, Logan hit Virgil’s contact and put it on speaker, tossing the phone next to him as he continued to stare upward. It rang twice before Virgil picked up.

“Lo, you know I hate talking on the phone,” Virgil greeted, voice groggy.

“Apologies, Virgil. Were you asleep?”

“No,” Virgil obviously lied, “whatsup?” Logan rubbed his eyes again. The imagine of Patton Foster’s soft, smiling face burned behind his eyelids.

“I need your assistance.”

“Oh?” Virgil snorted, “I was hoping you were just calling to check in on me.”

“Ha ha, focus please.”

“Right, right. What do you need help with?” Logan took a deep breath and wondered how the hell he could word this without making it sound like he had a crush. Because he didn’t. Logan had not had a crush in about six years, and he was not looking to break that record. Especially not because of Patton Goddamn Foster.

“Lo?”

“When did Patton Foster become attractive?”

Nailed it.

There was a pause on the other line before Virgil spoke again, voice wobbling slightly.

“What?” Logan sat up and grabbed his phone, bringing it closer to his lips.

“When did. Patton fucking Foster. Get. Hot.”

“Oh my GOD.” Logan heard a rustling as Virgil set down the phone, and listened as Virgil’s sudden laughter grew soft and muffled. Logan felt like his face was burning. Well, that had been a bit more blunt then Logan had intended, but it got the point across.

“OKAY, OKAY. Okay,” Virgil wheezed, picking his phone back up.

“H-hold on can we fucking Facetime, I wanna see your face.” Logan huffed but complied, hanging up the call.

He barely had a second to accept the Facetime Virgil had requested before Virgil was laughing again, his eyeshadow smeared with tears.

“Okay, okay. So, Patton Foster hasn’t changed in appearance for like, the last two and a half years. Hasn’t even changed how he’s gotten his hair cut.” Logan frowned, brow furrowing in utter confusion and concentration. He could hear Virgil snickering again, but ignored it.

“Then...how come I suddenly find him more attractive. Surely something changed.”

“Well, when did you ‘start finding him more attractive’,” Virgil asked, raising an eyebrow. Logan looked at the phone, feeling his face start to grow redder and redder. He couldn’t admit that he suddenly found Patton attractive because of the utterly ridiculous football game Virgil had dragged him to, he would never live it down!

It seemed, however, he had no choice. Not with the way Virgil was staring at him with his creepy, all-seeing eyes. Logan hated that look.

“Football game,” he muttered.

“What was that?” Virgil smirked.

“The football game.”

“Speak up, buddy.”

“THE STUPID FOOTBALL GAME, OKAY?!” Logan shouted, bright red again. Virgil didn’t even react the the shout.

“Oh? What about the football game?” Virgil wiggled his eyebrows. Logan somehow felt like he was growing redder.

“Say, isn’t Patton a cheerleader? Head cheerleader if I’m right.”

“Shut it.”

“Oh? Cheerleaders sure are flexible aren’t they Lo? Did you see some of the flips they did? And those splits?”

“I despise you with the heat of a thousand metaphorical suns,” Logan growled. Virgil snickered.

“Aw, love you too Lo. Welcome to the crush club.”

“I do not have a crush on him!”

“Ah, stage 1 of the crush club, I remember it well,” Virgil said poking his tongue out a bit. Logan frowned, eyes narrowing at his friend.

“Stage 1? What do you mean?”

“Denial,” Virgil winked. Logan stared at Virgil a moment, before deadpanning, “that is the first stage of grief, Virgil.”

“Eh, you’re grieving your sanity. Good luck Lo. Sleep well. Don’t think about Patton in his cheer outfit. Or out of it,” Virgil grinned wickedly and sent Logan some finger guns before ending the call.

Needless to say, Logan did not sleep well that night.

~~~~~

Logan flopped down next to Virgil during lunch, yanking open his lunchbox.

“Woah, what’d that lunchbox ever do to you?” Virgil asked, nodding to Logan’s aggressive behavior.

“This is so stupid,” Logan ripped into his sandwich like a hungry wolf, causing the few kids around them to scoot away. Even Virgil looked a bit intimidated, though it was overshadowed by a look that screamed impressed.

“What’s stupid?” Virgil asked. Logan threw down his half-eaten lunch and gestured vaguely in what had been previously dubbed the ‘Obnoxious  Vigil Pining Zone’. Aka, where Roman and Patton sat, surrounded by their friends. Come to think of it, take Virgil’s name out of that title and it would still fit perfectly.

“Oh? Stage 2 huh?” Virgil asked, folding his hands and placing his chin on them. Logan scowled.

“I hate this. Look at his stupid, smiling face. Why is he so happy all the time. I found myself staring at him the entirety of chemistry instead of taking notes. Now I have to ask someone else for the notes. People are going to wonder why I was not paying attention, Virgil!” Logan was maybe, possibly, raising his voice.

“Dude, I can’t believe I have to say this to you, but it’s just a crush.”

“I DON’T HAVE A CRUSH ON HIM!” Logan shouted, slamming his hands down on the table. A hush fell over the cafeteria, and Logan saw Patton looking at him out of the corner of his eye. Logan coughed into his fist and sat back down, cheeks dusted pink.

“Ah, yes. That’s why you screamed about it,” Virgil nodded as the regular chatter picked up again. Logan huffed and continued to eat his lunch, shoving down his irrational anger. He was being ridiculous.

~~~~

“Dear God,” Logan wasn’t religious, but he was about to try anything at this point. He had his head bowed as he squeezed his hands together and his eyes shut.

“Please, please, please. Let me have a crush on literally any student in this entire school other than Patton Foster. Please.”

Logan lifted his head and stared across the field, where the cheerleaders were warming up. Fuck.

Logan took a deep breath through his nose and took the first step across the football field, taking the ten seconds it would take to reach Patton to talk himself out of this.

Virgil complained about having a crush on the most popular boy in school, but he forgot the fact that not everyone actually liked Roman, since he was so loud, and obnoxious, and jocks and popular kids in general had negative points in the loser kids’ eyes. However, no matter the fact that Patton was the second most popular boy in school, no one hated him. Not students, not teachers, not even Virgil. And Virgil hated pretty much everyone except Logan and Roman (though he claimed to hate Roman at times).

All in all, extremely popular and beloved boy and nerdy, cold student body president were not compatible. In fact, if this were a movie, Patton would be matched with a proper love interest and Logan would be the creepy and/or cruel antagonist trying to pull the couple apart. In the end, Logan would be defeated and Patton and his lover would ride off into the metaphorical sunset, with the viewers caring nothing of Logan’s fate. Ugh, when did his fantasies become so elaborate?

“HI LOGAN!” Logan stumbled forward as a rather peppy and excited voice burst through his mental spiral. He felt strong arms wrap around his middle, stopping him from toppling over completely.

“Oopsie, sorry about that,” the familiar voice giggled. Oh, fuck. Logan felt his face heat up and he forced himself to pull away and look Patton in the eyes.

Bad choice, Logan. Bad choice! Patton’s eyes were warm and excited, like he was a puppy or something else most people found unbearably cute. Logan coughed and adjusted his glasses.

“Yes, well, hello. Thank you, Patton,” Logan said. Patton’s eyes grew wide and Logan worried he’d said something wrong before oh God he’s hugging me help me. Help me.

“You know my name!” Patton squealed, releasing Logan and sounding absolutely delighted. He was delighted that Logan knew his name.

“I, uh, yes. You are one of the most popular and well known students in our school,” Patton’s face dimmed at that, so Logan hurriedly tacked on, “also we’re in chemistry together!” Patton metaphorically ‘lit up’ again at that. Logan was more surprised that Patton knew his name if anything.

“Well what brings you here, Mr. President?” Patton winked, and Logan hoped his face wasn’t as red as it felt. He coughed and adjusted his tie (which he wore to school because being in school did not excuse looking improper), and then his glasses. Patton’s head dropped curiously to the side and it was, well, frankly it was adorable.

“The school board wanted me to check and make sure that the cheerleaders were practicing all the safety procedures required as they prepared their routine. Something about pyramids?” Patton crossed his arms and pouted at that.

“Aw are they saying we can’t do our pyramid? I was gonna be on top this time!” Patton either didn’t hear Logan choke on his own spit, or decided to ignore it. Logan prayed it was the former.

“I do not think they were not allowing you to do so, I believe they just said to make sure you practice with mats as much as possible until the next game!” Logan said hurriedly, a little too fast for his own taste. Patton lit up again, grabbing Logan’s hands and putting them on his chest; Logan sputtered at the sudden contact.

“Oh that’s wonderful! We got some new mats recently anyway, I think someone donated to the football team recently or something and we got some of the extra money-” Patton was still babbling, but Logan couldn’t focus on anything except the warm and soft material of Patton’s silky uniform under his hands- of the heartbeat pattering under his palms.

It reminded Logan of when he and a classmate as children found a tiny bird in the rain. The boy with him had placed it in Logan’s hands; he gave a smiling missing baby teeth, before he had gone to get his dad or something and Logan has just stared at the tiny thing in his cupped hands.

“Lo?” Logan snapped his attention away from where he was staring at Patton’s chest oh God.

“Apologies, Patton, I got distracted and was staring into space,” he pulled his hands away, mourning their warmth. Patton beamed and shrugged nonchalantly.

“All good! Say, did you wanna watch us practice?” Logan froze, brain rewinding and rewinding again the question.

“P-pardon?”

“Yeah, we don’t usually let boys watch since they usually make rude or inappropriate comments about the girls, but you haven’t glanced at them since you got here,” Patton laughed. Logan frowned.

“There are other cheerleaders here?” he asked, internally smacking himself because no Logan, Patton was out here practicing by himself.

“See what I mean?” Patton giggled. Without waiting for Logan to answer, Patton grabbed his hands again and dragged him over to the bleachers, dispensing him there.

“HEY GANG IS IT COOL IF LOGAN STAYS TO WATCH?” Patton called. Logan felt the gaze of the other cheerleaders on him as he turned his gaze to his shoes.

“Yeah, Logan’s cool. I’ve seen him at, like, one game and all he was doing was staring at you,” a girl shrugged. Logan spluttered and looked away.

“I only went because Virgil wanted to gawk at Roman Prince in his football uniform,” Logan grumbled. That caused a few snickers throughout the crowd.

“Can you blame him?”

“Nah, that’s the only reason I signed up for cheer.”

“Wait seriously? Oh my God!”

“Virgil? Like, the Virgil who hangs out with you all the time?” Patton put his hands on either side of Logan’s legs and leaned in and Jesus Patton ever hear of personal space?

“Um. Yes?”

“OH MY GOD!” Patton squealed bouncing up and away from Logan and doing a twirl which was...quite adorable.

“Oh my God, okay, so Roman’s been talking about Virgil like all the time now-a-days! He thinks Virgil hates him or something, but I keep trying to get him to ask him on a date and now I know he doesn’t hate Roman because he has a crush on Roman too!” Patton said it all in one breath, it made Logan slightly dizzy.

“Roman has a crush on Virgil? Well, then I’ve been listening to Virgil’s pining for nothing,” Logan grumbled, crossing his arms. Patton giggled.

“I know! Like, it’s obvious they like each other. Say why don’t we-” “PATTON STOP TALKING LOGAN’S EARS OFF WE NEED TO PRACTICE!” one of the cheerleaders called. Patton shrugged and bounded away, calling over his shoulder, “We’ll talk later LoLo!” Logan nodded, but as soon as Patton turned his back he put his head in his hands and screamed as silently as he could.

~~~~~

“Hey Log- woah, what happened to you?” Virgil asked that following Monday. Logan’s hair was a mess, glasses askew, and his tie was crooked. He sighed and looked at Virgil with a dead expression.

“I have a crush on Patton.”

“No shit. Wait did you two-”

“Finish that sentence and I will throw my Advanced History textbook at your head,” Logan grumbled. Virgil immediately backed off. Logan did not want to admit he had spent the entire weekend watching ‘How to Deal with a Crush’ videos on YouTube and eating Crofters jam straight out of the jar. Virgil must have seen something on his face though, as he shrugged and said with a small smile, “You admitted you have a crush on him.”

“I did.”

“Stage 5, congrats,” Virgil said. He didn’t sound exactly enthusiastic about it, though. Logan snorted.

“At least you have a chance.” Virgil’s head snapped up at that and he grabbed Logan by the shoulders, looking desperately into his eyes.

“Wait, what does that mean? Logan, who told you that? Did Patton? What did he say?!” Logan was cut off from answering when he saw Patton run over from behind Virgil and tap him on the shoulder. Virgil turned around and Patton waved.

“Heya! Would you mind if I stole Lo here for a teenie, tiny, second?” Logan felt his heart rate increase as Virgil looked desperately from one to another before slumping his shoulders in defeat and nodding.

“Thanks!” Patton chirped, latching onto Logan’s arm and practically dragging him to the auditorium. Logan followed meekly, not knowing what was in store for him.

“I got him!” Patton called, and Roman Prince appeared from the shadows, making Logan jump. He wondered, briefly, if the ability to melt into the auditorium background when not on stage came with the theater kid package.

“Excellent! Patton, you may go,” Roman waved him off. Patton pouted, giving that puppy-dog look that made the entire student body melt.

“But I wanna hang out with you guysssssss,” Patton whined. Logan felt the alarms in his head blare a bit. He didn’t mind getting kidnapped by Patton, because Logan’s logical reasoning on Patton had been burned, spat on, and tossed out a friggin window. Roman, however, had a history of being a bit of a bully at rare times, and Logan didn’t want to be alone with him.

“It’ll be just a second, promise!” Roman flashed Patton a smile, apparently immune to his charms. The perks of being Patton’s best friend, he supposed. Patton sighed and gave Logan a sad look. Logan hurriedly pulled out his phone and offered it to Patton, who looked confused.

“Add your number,” Logan said, surprised and pleased that his voice failed to crack or shake. Patton looked at it another second before snatching it from his hands and typing hurriedly.

“I texted myself so I’d have your number, but I’ll text you for real later!” Patton said, sounding like Logan had just gifted him with something much more valuable than a simple phone number. Logan nodded numbly and watched as Patton bounced off, finally turning to face his fate with Roman.

Roman Prince towered over him, as he was one of the tallest boys in the school, and Logan was one of the shortest, even with his impeccable posture. Logan didn’t let this deter him, though, as he’d heard Virgil gush about this boy to the point Logan was pretty sure he could escape any threat given to him based on that information alone (seriously, Virgil, Logan did not care about Roman Prince’s goddamn shoe size).

“So, I’ve been meaning to talk to you for a while, and since you and Patton are kind of the friends now it seemed like the opportunity has finally arisen,” Roman leaned back on his heels, looking almost nervous. Logan folded his arms and raised an eyebrow.

“Oh?”

“Yes I, um,” Roman rubbed the back of his head, “you are friends with Virgil, correct?” Logan blinked. Ah.

“Are you planning to ask him out?” Logan asked. Roman sputtered in surprise, waving his hands in front of himself.

“No! Yes? Maybe?!” Roman looked as though Logan had threatened to punch him. Scratch that- he looked like someone who wasn’t two heads shorter than him had threatened to punch him.

“I was a-actually wondering,” did Roman Prince just stutter? Logan was cackling internally, “if Virgil um, hates me?” Logan snorted despite himself, making Roman look horribly offended.

“What? He’s keeps glaring at me!” Roman said, sounding desperate. Logan chuckled.

“He does not hate you, Roman. I think he is simply perpetually stuck in stage 2.” Roman looked confused, rubbing his forehead.

“What? What does that mean? Logan, what does that mean?” Logan snickered.

“I’m sure he will tell you eventually. Just ask him out, Roman,” Logan said, a smile quirking at the corner of his lips. Roman scowled, and Logan turned on his heels to walk out.

He had his hand on the door when Roman called out, “Hey, Logan.” Logan turned and met Roman’s gaze; he was smiling wryly.

“You seem like a pretty cool guy. However, you being friends with Virgil won’t stop me from destroying you if you break Patton’s heart.” Logan felt all the blood drain from his face.

“W-what? What does that mean? Roman?” Roman sauntered past Logan, opening to door.

“We’re going to be late for class, which I know your little nerd heart wouldn’t be able to handle. Let’s go,” Roman strode past Logan, standing tall. Logan swallowed nervously, feeling a buzz from his phone.

Me [7:45 am]: fgfdhfghdf

Patton-cake <3 [7:58 am]: Hi Logi! It’s me, Patton!!!!!!! Well you probably knew that cause i put my name in your phone haha! See you in chem?

Logan smiled, putting Roman’s threat from his mind. Okay, so maybe he had a crush on Patton, but there were worse boys to fall for.

Me: I look forward to it immensely, Patton.

Taglist: @fluidityandgiggles @hanramz-the-fander @supremestoverlord @ilikesomeshtuff

[ronyxfic]

Educating the Victim - Act VI, Chapter XVIII

Pairing: Yellow Pearl/Yellow Diamond

Rating: Mature

Warnings/Tags: Alcohol, binge drinking, vomiting

CHAPTER 18: Drunk

 She looked up into the hotel room. Her shoulders fell. Rose.

Marigold hadn’t had to deal with drunk people in... a while. It had usually been her that had been drunk.

She sighed and pulled on her jacket, making her way to the bar to find Rose.

 A few glasses surrounded her. Rose sat hunched over a barstool, attracting a few concerned gazes.

"The one with the... cherry. Yeah. Thanks." One more and she'd head to sleep. One more.

   Marigold sat next to her, keeping a few inches between them. "Rose," she said in a low voice. "I think that's enough."

 "Last one..." Rose murmured. "You aren't my mom."

 “No, but I am your boss. Us being here on a personal mission doesn’t change that.” Marigold shot her a stern glance.

 Rose gave an amused chuckle. "What are you going to do? Fire me? We found out that's a long and tedious process, didn't we?"

 Marigold frowned. “I can give you a warning for technically drinking on the...” She exhaled. “Oh, who am I to talk?”

 "Just let me have this. I'll be better tomorrow. I don't want to be here."

 “You’ll be in hospital tomorrow if you keep going at this rate,” Marigold said. “Trust me, I’ve been keeping up.” She then sighed and turned to Rose, her voice becoming noticeably gentler. “What’s bothering you so much?”

 "What isn't bothering me? I might come face to face with my abuser." Rose was handed a martini. "Do you... wanna get some food? I should at least go to sleep with something in me. I'm hungry now."

 “Azure did say we could order anything. The restaurant should still be open, if you want to relocate. Though I’m sure we could get them to bring the food here as well. Are you feeling okay?”

 "No. I'm not okay." Rose took out the cherry and began to play with it. "I'm okay with fries if they have that... or whatever the expensive ritz equivalent is."

   "We could... get back to the room and get room service," Marigold said. "Do you think you can walk?"

 "Not this second..."

 Marigold looked around, visibly uncomfortable with the amount of stares they were getting. “We should really get back to our rooms. It’s getting late.”

 "Fine..." Rose replied, with an edge in her tone. "Can you do the ordering?"

 “Sure. I’ll call down from the room. Let’s go.” Marigold held out her arm to Rose, who would definitely need support.

 Rose clasped it. Her hand was warm, she couldn't meet Marigold's eye. They began to hobble back to the room.

"This is embarrassing."

 “Yes, absolutely.” Marigold stared ahead. “Let’s just get back to the room.”

 Rose let herself be led into the hotel elevator. "Do you really think she's just gonna be okay with seeing us... seeing me?"

 “I doubt it. But we have to try.” Marigold looked at Rose. “It would probably help if you weren’t hungover. But, again, who am I to judge.”

 "Oh God. What if it's tomorrow? What if I see her tomorrow?" Rose gave a wail.

 “Then you will have to... deal with that,” Marigold said. “You’re not jumping off the mission, are you?”

 "I can't now, can I?" Rose huffed. "I'm in fucking Italy!"

 “So what are you going to do, just be too hungover to function? That’s certainly one way to delay the inevitable.”

 "No... I'm gonna have to go with you, anyway. I need to finish this. For everyone."

 The elevator pinged. Marigold had memorised the directions to their room. “Come on.”

 Rose swayed as she followed. "All the rooms look the same..."

 “I know where we’re going,” Marigold said, reaching out to stabilise Rose again. They made it to their room and Marigold shepherded Rose inside before closing the door.

Inside, Marigold sat Rose down on one of the double beds. “Water,” she said, putting some fancy bottled water into her hands. “I’ll order food.”

 Rose popped the top off and took a sip. Her cheeks were flushed, her hand trembling a bit.

   Marigold took up the phone, figured out how to call room service, and ordered fries and a few fancy-sounding Italian dishes (the food was bound to be good, and Azure was paying). She then looked at Rose and came over to her.

“Food is ordered,” she said. “It will be here soon.”

 "Nice. Thank you." Rose laid back on the mattress. "I don't understand how you can be so calm."

 “About you being drunk off your face, or about Roxy?” Marigold said. She sat down on the chair and folded her hands.

 "Roxy... but the drunk thing, too."

 “Well, that one is easy. I spent most of the last few years drunk. Trust me, I know the feeling. As for Roxy...” Marigold frowned. “She was my friend. I... I’m wary of her, but there must be a reason for why she’s doing this. I don’t... hate her.”

 "Ohhh, so it's easy for you." Rose gave a laugh. "I suppose it must've been if she didn't have it out for you."

 “Well, she was always quite racist.” Marigold grimaced at the memory. “You know, in the ‘I’m not racist but’ way. I could never understand how Azure could be such good friends with her.” She caught herself. “Sorry. Dating.”

 "Oh, Jesus Christ, yeah. I mean, it didn't really ever stop if you were white, either. She just found something else to tear into."

 Marigold sighed. “Claire was the only one who could ever control her.”

 "Somehow, I find that hard to believe."

 “What do you mean?”

 Rose shrugged. "Oh, I don't know. I just can't imagine anyone with the will." She turned around. "I thought all that time that maybe if I just obeyed her and went along with it all, she'd at least... value what we had. But no. No, she just had to cheat on me after knowing how much remaining monogamous hurt me!"

 “You didn’t... know she was dating Azure.” Marigold frowned. “Oh.”

 "No! No, I didn't! She forbade me from seeing anyone. It was her condition for dating me, because she knew I was poly when I started." Rose's voice began to break a bit. "And it hurt so much. I had to distance myself from so many people."

 “Why did you do it, then?” Marigold asked.

 "Because I loved her. She was fun. She was exciting. She was... so funny and talented and was so good at making me laugh."

 Marigold gave a soft smile. “She was that.”

There was a knock on the door. “Oh, that’ll be the food.”

 Rose watched her get it, looking downcast. "Okay."

 Marigold returned with a little cart full of food. “Here you go,” she said, “just take whatever you want. There’s fries here, but you can also have some of the fancy food.”

 "Fries are fine for now." Rose looked over it. "It all looks great, I just want to see how it settles first."

 Marigold gave her a glance. “Are you going to be sick? Here.” She took the bin from the corner of the room and placed it in front of her. “Just in case.”

 "Thanks. I know I probably should abstain, but I didn't even have breakfast. I haven't skipped meals since... her."

 “You drank all of that... on an empty stomach?” Marigold felt sick.

 "I just kept getting more drunk... and drinking more just seemed like a good idea."

 “It probably wasn’t. Don’t eat too fast, and have water with it.”

 Rose tried her best to keep eye rolling discreet. "Gotcha."

 “Don’t give me that look. I’m looking after you.”

  It's not as if you know what I'm dealing with.

Rose took a swig of the water bottle. "Just... You and Azure nn-need to stop telling me she's a good person. "

 “She shot someone,” Marigold said. “If she ever was a good person, she isn’t anymore. It’s not the same as being able to be reasoned with.”

 "Exactly! Exactly the reason she deserves a life in prison and not... whatever gentle shit is coming... but... I need this court case."

 “Closure?” Marigold asked. “I understand. I... just want to know why she’s trying to take away Claire’s vineyard.”

 "Because she's a twisted bitch! There's your answer!"

 “You’re not being fully objective, Rose.”

 "Come on! I know her. It's been nearly six years and she hasn't left my head!"

 “I knew her for far longer than that,” Marigold said. “And I knew Claire. Roxy wouldn’t do this without a reason, I’m sure of it.”

 Rose sat, hugging her knees. "What was she to you?"

 “Roxy was my friend,” Marigold said, “and she was very close to Claire. Had been even closer before I came to Bridge club.” She paused. “Damn,” she said, the realisation coming to her thirty-five years too late, “they were dating. They must have been.”

 "Oh! Is that a clue into the whole wineyard thing?" Rose slurred, more alert.

 “Possibly,” Marigold said. “Did she ever mention Claire to you?”

 "Never, no. She constantly compared me to an unnamed ex, though."

 “What did she say?”

 "Just offhand things... about the things she did and the ways she behaved."

 “Hmm.” Marigold took some of the food, thinking.

 Rose picked up a chip. "Why would you hang out with someone who's that racist?"

 “It was the eighties. Everyone was racist. And she was Claire’s friend.” Marigold shrugged.

 "Ah, I see." Rose ate another. "These are good..."

 Marigold dug into her food. It was excellent. “You doing okay?”

 "A bit queasy, to be honest. Not my proudest evening."

 Marigold nudged the bin towards her. “Honestly, I’ve done worse. If there’s anything you want to vent about, feel free.”

 Another chip. "How much worse?"

 “You really want to know?”

 "Why not? It'll probably make me feel better."

 “Well, it’s not like you’ll remember it.” Marigold sighed. “I convinced myself I wasn’t gay for five years while being drunk out of my mind every single night and... sleeping with my very female secretary multiple times a week.”

 "Oh, Jesus, yeah... Aurora. God, she's younger than me!"

 A soft smile as Marigold thought of Aurora. “I can’t believe she... still loves me after all that. But she does.”

 "God. You really are into her. I miss being able to trust relationships that much.”

 “Roxy?” Of course.

 "Indeed." Rose just looked... broken.

 “Why did you stay?” Marigold asked. “Actually... that’s probably a stupid question.”

 "That's okay. You don't tend to understand if you've never been through it." Rose put her chip down. "I became incredibly codependent. She began to control every inch of my life. I felt like if I said the wrong thing or broke up, she'd kill herself."

 Marigold’s heart went cold. “I did that,” she said, “to Aurora. I didn’t tell her I’d kill myself, but I required her to do what I wanted, all the time. Never even gave a thought to her desires and needs.”

 Rose froze, and then swallowed. "But do you at least understand it was wrong?"

 Marigold inclined her head. “Yes,” she said, “and I won’t ever ask anything of her again unless I know she wants to give it to me. And... and she does. Miraculously, she’s stayed.”

 "Huh. That entire family is like that, I swear."

 “You’ve had experience with Pearl, I presume.” Marigold looked at her nails. “I’m not going to pry. I know you’re close. I trust both of you to keep in line with regards to that.”

 "Oh, trust me. We're just about friendly again." She decided to keep tight lipped on Pearl moving in. "What are you hoping to get out of all this... except for the vineyard. That can't be that important?"

 “Oh, it is, though,” Marigold said. “Claire... is buried there. It was hers. She always wanted it to stay in the family. She was passionate about her wine, and didn’t want some corporation to come in.”

 "Is she actually aligned with any named corporation?" Rose tilted her head.

 “I never found out. So probably not. They were incredibly cagey when I called them about it – whoever ‘they’ are.”

 "Yikes." Rose frowned. "That's unfortunate."

 “Yeah. I don’t understand why she would do this.” Marigold looked at Rose. “How are you feeling?”

 "Not... so great."

 “Need anything?”

 Rose stood up, wobbling. "Where's... The bathroom?"

 "It's over there," Marigold said. "Can you make it? The bin is here if you can't."

 Rose shot off to the bathroom, stumbling over furniture, slamming the bathroom door shut before heaving.

 Marigold watched, and then got up to get another bottle of water for Rose. She fluffed the pillows, trying not to be reminded of Claire.

Claire had chemotherapy. Rose is just drunk. There’s a difference.

But the instinct to take care of Rose was there.

She decided to leave Rose to it for now.

 Rose took her time and emerged after about ten minutes, pale. She looked at the bin and grabbed it. "Just in case..." she murmured.

 Marigold handed her the water. “Small sips,” she said. “We should probably think about going to sleep, if you can.”

 "That was the plan." Rose sighed, slinking under the covers. "I take it that this is my bed now."

 “Sure,” Marigold said. “Are you okay, do you need anything?”

 "Company would be nice."

 “I can provide that,” Marigold said, giving a small smile. “How are you feeling now?”

 "Still awful." Rose sighed. "I hate to say it, but you... were right."

 Marigold could name probably about five instances of her being right in the past few hours. “About what?” she asked.

 "I don't know. Probably everything, but I'm not ready to admit that yet. So... the drinking."

 Marigold sighed. “I’ve been in your shoes far too many times not to recognise when someone is overdoing it. I’m just glad I stopped you when I did.”

 Rose responded by picking up the bin and vomiting straight into it.

 Marigold sat next to her. She couldn’t help herself from reaching out and holding Rose’s hair back, lightly rubbing her back in the process.

 Rose took a minute to finish, trembling by the time she was done. She gave a cough and groaned in pain. "Hurts."

 Marigold loosened her hold on Rose’s hair, still rubbing her back. “I know,” she said. “I wouldn’t recommend taking painkillers until the morning, though. Most of them don’t mix well with alcohol.”

 "Okay." Rose wiped at her mouth with her sleeve. "I think I'm done. Where's that water?"

 “Here,” Marigold said, handing it to her. “Don’t ruin your clothes. We’re in a fancy hotel. I’ll get you a towel.”

 Rose finished the bottle, slowly and wiped at her face again. "I'll... take it out of the room..."

 “No, don’t worry about it. You just lie down, I’ll take care of it.” Marigold went away and came back with a damp, warm towel. “Here you go, clean yourself up. There’s probably some juice in the fridge if you want to get rid of the taste. Are you done, do you think?”

 "Yeah, I don't feel as sick anymore." Rose gave a weak smile. "Thanks. I think I would've made it out of the door and fallen over."

 Marigold nodded and took the bin away into the bathroom, where she cleaned up and rinsed it. On the way back to Rose’s bed she stopped by the fridge. “How are you feeling now?”

 "Ready to try sleeping." Rose was back under the blanket. "Drained."

 “Here.” Marigold handed her two bottles: one water, one orange juice. “Try to have some if you can. Let me know if you’re feeling worse again, but sleep if you can.”

 "Will do." Rose took a sip of each and lay down. "Principal D- Marigold... I'm sorry about all this."

 “Well, next time try dealing with your feelings in a slightly more healthy way.” Marigold gave her a small but genuine smile. “I’m happy to talk about things more. In the morning. According to Azure, we have quite a drive ahead of us.”

 "Yeah. Maybe... it might be helpful for me to hear more of your side of the story," Rose admitted.

 “Quite possibly. Go to sleep, now.” Marigold resisted the urge to tuck her in.

 Rose turned around, "Okay. You... rest well."

 Marigold nodded and disappeared towards the bathroom to get changed and brush her teeth. When she came out, she turned off the lights and plugged her phone in to charge, but not before sending a message to Aurora.

Had to look after Rose. It was... rough. I can’t help but be reminded of the many days I spent drunk. I cannot ever thank you enough for putting up with me and looking after me back then, and I’m still so sorry for the way I acted. I love you. Sorry again about earlier, I will definitely keep you in the loop from now on. Good night. x