#like if i was an companion or the doctor you BET i would wear period accurate stuff
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heyitsspaceace · 11 months ago
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something i am SO excited about for the new doctor who seasons is that they seem to really be playing with fashion and period specific fashion and i’m SO hyped about that. like seeing 15 have what…like 5 different outfits in the christmas special? the regency outfits in the trailers and the 60’s-70’s vibes for the beatles episode? ive always thought that there should be more historical fashion in doctor who. you see it like once in season one, and it’s just rose in episode 3, the other time in the 50’s with ten and rose as well, it was really great in 11’s christmas special as well and i love it, and the episode where bill and 12 go to the 1800’s. but give me more. like we know the tardis has a sick wardrobe!! use it!! for a person who’s main thing is like “oh don’t mess up time!” (which she fails at miserably most of the time bc she can’t stop messing with time) the doctor never thinks to wear historical dress and i personally think they would love that!! yeah i know it’s probably a “oh each doctor has a distinct look! gotta keep it that way!!” okay but when i see all of 15 outfits, no matter what era, i still see them as still absolutely in line with 15’s vibes.
anyways this is so incoherent but yeah the TL:DR is that GIVE ME MORE HISTORICALLY ACCURATE PERIOD WEAR FOR DOCTOR WHO EPISODES THAT TAKE PLACE IN THE PAST!! I LOVE IT SO MUCH!!!
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molluskwritesfic · 4 years ago
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The Waif ~ Chapter Three
As an alien science experiment, she remembers nothing. Knows no one. With nowhere else to turn, Claudia must rely on the Doctor and his companions for help. She's mutating. The Doctor knows more than he's telling. But why does the Time Lord seem to hate her so much? Rated M.
Masterlist - Fanfiction.net - Ao3
Prologue - Previous Chapter - This Chapter
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Chapter Three: The Mimic - Part One
Claudia woke up slowly from within her blanket cocoon. Twenty four hours earlier, she wouldn’t have believed it were possible, but now she was so warm and sleepy that it took her a minute to realize what had woken her. 
She jolted slightly when there was a knock at the door; three sharp raps, like Dinstral would on the glass of her small prison whenever he wanted her attention. The similarity made her heart drop. For a fraction of a second her still-dozy mind believed that the scientists had found her again. 
She brushed the thought away, writing it off as ridiculous, and called out, “Yes?”
Decidedly the exact opposite of Dinstral, Rose tentatively pushed her way inside. She was already dressed, but still rather hazy, like she hadn’t been up long enough to be fully awake. 
“Morning,” Rose greeted with a small smile. “I was gonna let you sleep, but the Doctor gets grumpy if we leave him on his own for too long. How do you feel about breakfast?”
Claudia’s stomach rumbled at the mention of food, but then clenched as her mind automatically went to the bland porridge that her diet had consisted of over the last few weeks. But she reckoned that normal people are more than slimy oatmeal. 
She nodded, trusting that Rose had something better in mind.
“Great. Get dressed and I’ll show you the kitchen.”
Claudia fumbled out of bed and made for the closet. She opened the dark purple door and gawked at the sight. Beyond was a massive walk-in closet, complete with a vanity. The entire room, wall to wall, was completely packed with clothes. 
There were dresses, jeans, coats, shorts, skirts, a series of undergarments, and more. There was even a smaller connecting room completely dedicated to a myriad of shoes - the purpose to many of them she couldn’t even begin to decipher. 
If this was a personal closet, Claudia couldn’t imagine what the main wardrobe was like. Surely there were more articles of clothing in this one room than she could ever wear in her entire life.
“You alright?” Rose called from the squashy orange couch, where she had sprawled out to wait. 
“Yeah,” Claudia squeaked. “But what do I wear?”
“Whatever you like.”
Claudia considered this. “But I don’t know what I like.”
Rose heaved a sigh. “Just look for somethin’ you think you like, and put it on. 
Claudia blinked at Rose. Then at the closet. Overwhelmed, but eager, she plunged into the depths.
~0~0~0~ . . ~0~0~0~
When Claudia tumbled out of the closet twenty minutes later, she was the living manifestation of her maximalist bedroom - had its style been based on a three year old that insisted on dressing itself. After so long in a cold, colorless environment, she positively adored anything bright and soft, and felt the need to hoard it all like a magpie.
Her short excursion into her personal wardrobe had been filled with her digging through the racks and shelves in search of color. At which point her finds were then separated into piles to be sorted by which colors she liked best. 
After a period of painful deliberation and significant indecision, she finally emerged wearing an avocado green jumper decorated with little red frogs under a chunky dandelion yellow cardigan, long rainbow socks over electric blue jeans, solid red trainers with sequins dotting across the toes, all topped off with a neon magenta beanie and matching gloves. 
Beaming with excitement, Claudia hardly registered the raised eyebrow Rose directed at her choice of style. 
“Blimey,” Rose snorted, struggling not to laugh outright in the face of the memory-less woman’s optimism. “That’s… uh… boisterous.”
Claudia wasn’t sure if this was a compliment or not, but chose to believe it was meant well. She grinned and tugged her hat down more securely on her head. 
“Right, then. Come on.” Rose paused in front of Claudia’s bathroom mirror, taking a moment to smear away a bit of the eye liner caked around her eye that was a smidge uneven.
Claudia made a mental note to ask Rose how makeup worked as she followed her through the maze of corridors that led to the kitchen.
The kitchen was large but homey. It contained the usual variety of items to cook with as well as a number of things that Claudia didn’t recognize. 
“How do you not get lost?” Claudia inquired as Rose made her way to a machine that appeared to be some sort of drink dispenser.
“You get used to it, I guess. She moves rooms around a lot, so you just sort of guess. Coffee or tea?” 
Claudia blanked. “Can you… pick for me?” 
Rose nodded and placed a mug beneath the dispenser. With the press of a few buttons, hot liquid was streaming into the mug. Claudia watched, transfixed, as the steam rolled off of it, curling into pretty shapes that swirled and danced like living creatures before dissolving into the air.
Rose settled down with two mugs and two plates of bacon and eggs. Claudia took a sip of her coffee, but grimaced at the taste. 
Rose grinned and indicated the dispenser. “Go add milk and sugar.”
Claudia hopped to her feet and pondered the machine. It looked complicated, but she found it to actually be fairly straightforward. Curious about her own preferences, Claudia spent more time toying with it than necessary, adding milk and sugar in miniscule amounts until enjoyable. 
Sipping at the now lukewarm liquid, she made her way back to the table. Her mouth watered at the collective smell of the bacon, eggs, and coffee. She picked up a fork and, with a certain amount of trepidation, scooped egg into her mouth.
Rose watched bemusedly as Claudia wolfed down the large plate of food at an alarming speed. 
“Blimey, you were hungry, weren’t ya?” The blonde commented as she took another sip from her own mug, which was filled with tea, quirking her eyebrows at the other woman over the rim of the mug.
Claudia just shrugged, unable to respond around her bacon and egg stuffed mouth. When it was gone, she glanced longingly at the food-dispenser machine. Not that she was still hungry - she was stuffed - but because she wanted to see what other things tasted like.
“You can mess about with that later,” Rose promised. “ The Doctor will be wondering where we got to. I’m surprised he hasn’t come looking for us yet.”
~0~0~0~ . . ~0~0~0~
The Doctor was standing at the console when they arrived, staring at the monitor with a serious expression. From over Rose’s shoulder, Claudia made out what appeared to be a black and white video, fuzzy, vague, and lacking any artistic quality. She thought that it might have been from a security camera, but the Doctor abruptly switched it off before she could get a proper look.
“What’re you watching?” Rose inquired, bounding over and leaning against the console beside him, close enough for their shoulders to brush.
“Nothing,” he said quickly. He yanked down a lever with a certain degree of flair, his previous severity melting like butter. “So, Rose Tyler, where to now? I was thinking maybe the moon of Tyink. Lots of lovely views. Oh! Or the United Republic of Snah. Those people there love a party. The Sun Festivals are the best across three galaxies. Mind you, better not go during the Snee era, never mind why…. or…”
Rose cast Claudia a glance. “Actually, Doctor, shouldn’t we be looking into that science ship from yesterday?”
“We took care of the science vessel,” the Doctor griped, keeping his eyes fixed on the switches he was fiddling with. 
“Yeah, but what about Claudia? Shouldn’t we be trying to figure out what happened with her memory?”
Claudia felt a rush of gratitude and looked to the Doctor expectantly.
“The blood sample didn’t reveal anything I didn’t already know,” the Doctor explained, as if doing so inconvenienced him greatly. “A buildup of mutagenic particles mixed with alien DNA. It’ll dissipate eventually. Give it a year or two and all the residual components should be completely gone.”
“What about my memories?” Claudia asked, quiet and hopeful.
“I don’t know,” the Doctor said in a flat voice, his emotions carefully concealed behind a mask. “I went back to Cardiff when you were sleeping. The Thalians dropped their test subjects all across the city, probably as some form of stimulus experiment to see how you would respond to stressful situations. That’s all.”
“What happened then?” Her heart was hammering in her chest. Her fingernails dug painfully into her palms. She barely noticed when Rose wrapped an arm around her shoulders.
“You said that one of the test subjects displayed unchecked aggression,” he added, not bothering to look at her. “I’m willing to bet that it was a cascade neural degradation response to the treatments. Most likely you experienced something similar, but it manifested differently.” He paused. “Bit lucky, actually.”
Claudia pondered this for a moment. She certainly didn’t feel lucky. Words failed her. All she could do was stare at him, emptiness welling up inside her, reclaiming it’s hold on her soul.
“Can’t we figure out where she came from?” Rose pressed, fixing the Doctor with a reproachful glare.
“No real way to find out,” he sniffed. “Doubtful she’s from anywhere near Cardiff. Have you noticed her accent? Indistinct. Thalians are capable of traveling the vortex, so without her memories, there’s no way to narrow it down.”
“But there’s got to be something,” Rose hissed, casting Claudia a sideways glance. “Are you not even going to try?”
Claudia said nothing. She stood silently, staring at her glittery shoes without really seeing them. They'd made her feel so happy before, but now she felt nothing when the boisterous sparkles blurred as her eyes welled with tears. She wrapped her arms around herself in an imitation of a hug. She tried not to cry, she really did. But a single tear rolled down her cheek unbidden.
When she finally spoke, she did so quietly that her words could barely be heard over the hum of the engines. “What do I do now?” 
“Nothing, I suppose. That’s all there is to it.” The Doctor shrugged, going back to the console.
“Doctor!”
“Rose, leave it,” the Doctor snapped, his voice low and laden with warning. A hidden meaning lingered in his dark eyes, one that Claudia couldn’t begin to decipher but Rose took to heart. 
Rose blinked at him for a moment, but immediately dropped it, brimming with eager curiosity. 
“So, where to?” The Doctor repeated his earlier question, dropping the severity and attempting to take back on a cheerful facade. It almost worked. “Snah?”
“Actually, I was thinking about stopping by home,” Rose suggested, voice still tense from the previous exchange. 
“What for?” The Doctor scoffed, lip curling into a scowl. 
“Oi! Don’t start!” The corners of her mouth gave the slightest twitch, like it was an old joke. “I’ve got that Moeysian necklace for my mum, the one we got on Iria? I promised her a souvenir and I need to get it to her before I forget.”
The Doctor sighed wearily but began the sequence. Claudia remembered to grab onto the railing as the ship began to jolt violently, but didn’t really feel it. She was busy biting down her despair into bitter acceptance. 
When the TARDIS landed, she had steeled herself. Her emotions were locked down tight in a steel box. It left her feeling numb and grey, but it was better than the alternative.
“There. Earth. Powell Estate. 2007.” The Doctor looked up from the controls. “A couple months after we left.”
“Alright. You go on out. Just give me two ticks.” Rose hurried back into the corridor, presumably to retrieve the gift for her mother, leaving Claudia alone with the Doctor.
The Doctor sighed, shrugging on his light brown trench coat as he approached the doors leading to the outside world.
“Where’s the Powell Estate?” Claudia asked shyly, wiping her eyes on her sleeve as she followed him out into a grey parking lot. 
She surveyed the surrounding buildings curiously. And to be fair, everywhere was interesting after spending the majority of your conscious life locked in a glass case. 
The sun was out, it’s position suggesting that it was mid to late afternoon. The warm air and thick greenery on the nearby trees and shrubs she could spot through the gaps in the buildings told her it was spring. 
She took a deep breath, reveling in the earthy scent. 
“London,” The Doctor responded, leaving the door open for Rose and leaning against the side of the blue box. He cast her a glance and tugged at his ear awkwardly. “Do you… uh… know where that is?”
Claudia shook her head. The name meant as much to her as the other places they’d mentioned. Iria and Moeysian and Snah. She leaned beside him, careful to leave a few inches of space between them. 
The Doctor’s frown intensified. He studied her closely for a heartbeat before turning away once more, as if looking at her caused him physical pain. 
She couldn’t imagine why. Claudia looked down at her outfit. Maybe boisterous hadn’t been a compliment after all.
Suddenly self-conscious, she took off her gloves and stuffed them into her cardigan pocket.
“2007?”
“Mm-hmm.”
“Rose said that your box travels in time.”
“Yep.”
“When am I from?”
The Doctor sighed through his nose. “The ship you were on was in October of 2007. Just a few months after where we are now. But like I said, the Thalians are capable of time travel, so you could be from anywhere.”
Claudia nodded, pushing back thoughts having to do with her past. “The scientists were Thalians?”
The Doctor nodded, staring resolutely at the graffiti sketched on the wall across the lot.
“And they’re aliens?”
“Yep,” he said, popping the ‘p’.
“And I’m human?”
The Doctor let out a breath that hissed through his teeth. “Yes.”
“Like Rose?”
“Like most everyone on Earth.”
“What about you?” The question had been nagging at the back of her mind, but she hadn’t gotten around to asking Rose yet. “Are you human or Thalian or…?”
“Time Lord,” he grunted. “Last of the Time Lords.”
“Last?” The Doctor tensed. Claudia noticed and decided not to ask about it anymore. “I’m sorry.”
“What is taking her so long?” He grumbled, mostly to himself, before leaning inside the door and calling, “Hurry up, will you?”
“Alright! No need to shout,” Rose’s voice drifted out, her clanging footsteps audible from outside the TARDIS as she stomped across the console room. When she emerged she didn’t hesitate to lead the way across the lot towards one of the buildings. 
They had nearly reached it when a dark skinned man dressed in blue coveralls came sprinting around the corner, panting like he’d run a fair distance.
“Look out, here comes trouble,” The Doctor grumbled, only half-playful.
“Rose!” The man shouted, a massive grin spreading across his face when he laid eyes on the blonde. 
Rose beamed back and he hurried to throw his arms around her shoulders to pull her into a bear hug. “Oh, I’ve missed you!”
The man released Rose and clapped the Doctor heartily on the shoulder. “I was in the shop but couldn’t get away.” He shrugged his shoulders sheepishly. “I was worried I’d miss you.”
“Time was, you’d hear the TARDIS and come running,” Rose teased, eyes narrowing impishly. 
“Well I did, didn’t I?” He protested, gesturing to his work clothes. “I was under a car. It took a minute.” His eyes drifted between the pair for a moment before they rested on Claudia, who had stayed back. He smiled warmly at her. “Don’t believe we’ve met. I’m Mickey, by the way.”
“Claudia.” Claudia shook his proffered hand with a small smile. He seemed nice, if not a bit dopey.
The Doctor rolled his eyes, nudging Claudia away from Mickey with his shoulder. “Come on then, go and see your mum. I don’t want to stay here all day.”
“Good luck with that, mate,” Mickey chuckled. “Jackie’s not about to let Rose be anywhere else. Not today, at least.”
“Why? What’s today?” The Doctor narrowed his eyes, trying to work out what he’d missed.
Mickey rolled his eyes like it was the most obvious thing in the world. “I don’t know, maybe Rose’s birthday.”
“It’s the 27th?” Rose echoed, her wide eyes blinking in surprise. 
“Yeah” Mickey confirmed. “Your mum’s been worried that you wouldn’t turn up, especially since you missed your last one.”
“How old are you?” Claudia inquired, shuffling back from around the Doctor so she could be included in the conversation.
Rose frowned thoughtfully. “It’ll be my twentieth, I guess.” She shook her head to clear it. “Time’s funny on the TARDIS. I don’t really know if I’m older than twenty, or still younger.”
“Younger, technically,” the Doctor offered. “We missed a year, remember?”
“Yeah.” Rose frowned. “Does that make me nineteen, then?”
“Does it matter?” The Doctor complained. “You don’t exactly live linearly. Technically, it isn’t your birthday at all. Not to you, anyway.”
“But it is to her.” Mickey crooked his thumb in the direction of Jackie’s flat. “She’s been looking forward to it. She’s got presents and everything.”
“Fine,” the Doctor relented, albeit begrudgingly,  as if he were giving in to give the humans a treat. But looking at Rose’s determination and Mickey’s smug grin, Claudia could tell that the alien didn’t actually have much choice. “But just until tomorrow, you got that?”
“Whatever you say, boss,” Mickey smirked cheesily.
Together, the small group, headed by Rose and Mickey, who had launched into a deep conversation about what Rose had missed while she’d been traveling, made its way towards one of the buildings. 
Naturally, Claudia brought up the rear, lingering a couple yards behind the Doctor. Her first instinct was to walk side by side with him, as the small party was even numbered, but the Doctor had shoved his hands into his coat pockets and prowled stoically after the others with long strides that kept an intentional distance between himself and Claudia.
Instead of struggling to keep up, she resigned to his apparent distaste towards her and focused instead on placing one foot in front of the other, wiggling her toes within her comfortable new shoes and appreciating the barely audible clacks they made on the asphalt. 
Claudia's attention was diverted, however, when an uncomfortable tingling sensation itched its way up her spine. Her eyes darted away from her feet as she reevaluated her surroundings in a manner resembling a nervous cat. 
Outwardly, there was no significant change in the environment. Rose, Mickey, and the Doctor passed through the glass door without a hitch, though the resulting screech of the rusted hinges made Claudia flinch. 
The sensation somewhat passed as she herself entered the building, but through the glass pane she caught a glimpse of a man staring at her from across the lot. 
He was tall, that much was apparent. Almost too tall, in Claudia’s opinion. From what she could make out at a distance, he was bald. His face appeared to be almost comically wide and dimensionless, contrasting starkly with the long brown cloak that shrouded his entire form, covering everything from chin to feet. 
There was something odd about him, but she didn’t much care to find out what. In a series of small, rapid movements, Claudia closed the distance between herself and the group and flatly ignored the mildly irritated glance the Doctor gave her when she accidentally stepped on the back of his shoe on the way up the stairs.
When they got to the correct door, Rose let herself in without the slightest hesitation. “Mum?”
“Rose!” Rose’s mother, Jackie, a rotund woman with blonde hair similar to her daughter’s, poked her head out from a bedroom just off the side of the short hall. She beamed at the younger woman and immediately drew her into a hug. “Oh, I was just wondering when you’d turn up.” 
She released her from the hug and held her at arm's length.
“Four months,” she accused. “It’s been four months. You said ten bloody seconds. Not that I actually believed that, but four bleeding months.”
“I didn’t lie,” Rose scoffed, taken slightly aback by the confrontation. “It’s a time machine, we could’ve been back in ten seconds.”
“But you weren’t,” the older woman snipped back. “Instead you leave me sitting here… on my own... for months at a time. When it comes to that long, I start wondering if you’re going to come back at all.” 
Despite Jackie’s snide tone, the real emotions behind it were plain. She was lonely and worried for her daughter’s safety; terrified that one day Rose wouldn’t come back, and she’d be left with nothing.
Claudia felt a flicker of jealousy and longing, trying to imagine what it would be like to have someone worrying over her that way. For all she knew, there was. Someone could be waiting for her to come home.
But that almost made her feel worse.
“What’re you all still doing crowding my doorway?” Jackie scolded, redirecting her energy into something a little more friendly. “In or out. Hold on…” Claudia blushed slightly upon realizing that she was now at the center of the group’s attention. Jackie’s eyes were lighter than her daughter’s, more hazel than brown. In them was a maternal glint, coupled with an appraising air. “Who’re you, then?”
“That’s Claudia,” Rose answered for her. “She’s staying on the TARDIS for a bit.”
A bit? Claudia wondered. Where else would I go?
She shuddered at the thought and returned her attention to Jackie, who had wheeled around to confront the Doctor.
“Oh, snatched up another one, have you?” Jackie accused, hands on her hips. “Just like a man. One’s not enough, is it? You’ve just got to surround yourself with pretty young women. You might as well collect them.”
“Nice to see you, too, Jackie,” The Doctor snipped sarcastically as he moved around her to get into the sitting room. 
The Tyler residence was homey, if not on the small side. There were a few magazines laid to the side on the coffee table, full of celebrities and pop culture pieces. Claudia took a place on the edge of the couch and picked up one of the magazines, flipping through to see if anything seemed familiar.
Rose found a seat at the small dining table while Jackie immediately began bustling about making tea. The older woman didn’t stop talking for a moment, even while juggling multiple tea cups. Claudia immediately jumped back up to her feet and hopped into the kitchen to take a couple of the cups before Jackie could drop them.
“Anything I can do to help?” Claudia offered with a simple, kind smile. 
Jackie nodded and directed Claudia in pouring milk and distributing sugar while the Doctor plucked out one of the newspapers on the dinner table and flipped through it idly, opting to stay standing. 
Mickey naturally flopped down next to Rose. The young man produced the remote and switched on the tv, settling on a sports channel.
“... your birthday, though, Rose,” Jackie was bickering in her shrill voice. “I’ve got the shopping done an’ everything…”
“Really, mum. You shouldn’t have bothered…”
“I’ve got the cake in the fridge and the rest of the dinner’s ‘bout halfway finished…”
“Mum…”
“Now, I haven’t got any guests together yet. Not that I could, though, could I? What, with your track record… “
“Mum, we don’t need guests… “
“... it was lucky you turned up in the right decade. We could call Shareen, I suppose.” Jackie grimaced. “On second thought, best not. Doubt she’d come, anyhow.”
“Why not?” Rose inquired, blinking in mild alarm. “She’s my best mate.”
“Was, last I heard,” Jackie corrected, looking the slightest bit smug. “She got married, and you were nowhere to be found.”
“Married?” Rose echoed, voice hoarse with shock. “But… she can’t have.”
“Two months ago.”
“But she’s only…”
“Twenty.” The older woman fixed her daughter with a slightly disapproving glance. “She came around looking for you six months back. Wanted you as a bridesmaid. I told her that you were still off travelling but she wasn’t having it. ‘If she doesn’t want to be part of it, so be it’, she said...”
Rose stood blankly while her mother rattled on, flippantly dictating the destruction of the younger girl’s friendship. Claudia tried to keep her attention on an article about makeup, but she couldn’t help but see how Rose’s bottom lip trembled as she drew in a quivering breath.
It was a piteous sight, so much that Claudia was glad when the Doctor, who was oblivious to his blonde friend’s distress, interrupted. 
“What’s this about, then?” He inquired, holding up the newspaper he’d been looking through so it displayed an article about halfway through the paper.
The header read; Third Disappearance on the Powell Estate.
“Oh, that?” Jackie shrugged. “Yeah, word has it that a few people have gone missing. Police have no idea.”
“They’ve already passed by my place twice to ask questions,” Mickey complained. “A few drunk blokes go missing, and who do they turn to? The black guy.”
“Oh, come on Mickey,” Jackie scoffed. “They’re just on you because…”
“Because of all the times they questioned me back when Rose was missing,” Mickey said bitterly. “I almost lost my job, you know.”
The Doctor coughed to break the tense silence that followed. Claudia, who had been fidgeting nervously in the background, couldn’t help but let out a soft sigh of relief when the Doctor decisively threw the newspaper down on the coffee table.
“Well, while we’re here…”
“Oh, no you don’t!” Jackie cut him off, waving a warning finger under his nose. “Don’t you dare go swannin’ off! It’s Rose’s birthday and I’m not having you start all that ridiculous nonsense before we’ve even had time to cut the cake!”
“I don’t swan,” the Doctor retorted.
Before Jackie could respond, Rose stepped between the pair. 
“Don’t start!” She glanced at the Doctor and shot him a tiny grin that she thought her mother couldn’t see, her previous melancholy evaporating like mist. She turned back to Jackie. “Dinner’s not ready yet.”
“Rose,” Jackie pleaded, crossing her arms across her chest.
“You and Mickey finish getting everything ready, and by the time you’re done, we’ll be back and we’ll all have a proper sit down. Alright?”
“Why can’t I come help investigate?” Mickey complained. “I helped before with the Slitheen, remember?”
“Well...” the Doctor drawled. “Pressing a few buttons hardly makes you qualified for— ”
“What he means to say is,” Rose interrupted, fixing Mickey with her cute little tongue-in-teeth grin, “it’s probably nothing, anyway. We’ll go poke around a bit and be back before you know it, alright? I’m sure mum could use all the help she can get.”
Mickey gave a disbelieving scoff, but backed down, flopping back onto his place on the couch.
Rose wheeled back around to beam at the Doctor. “Shall we?”
The Doctor grinned back and offered her his hand to take. “Now then, Rose Tyler…”
He broke off suddenly, blood draining from his face when his eyes rested on Claudia, who had instinctively started to move to follow them. In the emotional turmoil of the past ten minutes or so, everyone - including Claudia - had forgotten she was there.
The Doctor’s eyes darted away, fixating on a framed picture of a little blonde girl as he dropped Rose’s hand in favor of rubbing his ear lobe between his forefinger and thumb. “Claudia, why don’t you, just… stay here for a bit. Help Jackie and Mickey.”
Claudia nodded and picked up another magazine, thumbing through and pretending to examine a page to hide any emotion that might have shown on her face. 
The young woman rolled the corner of a page between her fingers until it curled in on itself, feeling sheepish at her somewhat needy urge to follow them about like a lost dog.
“Well, that’s them, then,” Jackie sighed when they’d gone, leaning back against the wall. Her face had lost some of its color,  “First time I’ve seen her in months and she runs off again first thing.”
“Tell me about it,” Mickey grumbled. “But that’s us, I guess.”
“That’s us,” Jackie agreed ruefully before turning her attention to Claudia. She studied the younger woman for a moment, her gaze warmer than before. “What’s your story, then?”
“My story?” Claudia echoed. “I’ve only known them for a day.”
“Yeah, but how did you end up wound up in this? The Doctor, I mean,” Mickey clarified. “I got kidnapped by a vat of living plastic.”
“And my daughter ran off with an alien,” Jackie added sourly.
Claudia blinked at them, trying to mentally work out the presented scenarios. Mickey slapped her shoulder good-naturedly. 
“Come on, then. You’re part of the club now.”
“Club? What club?”
“The ‘I-Survivied-the-Doctor Club.’” A cheeky grin ate its way across his face. “We should get shirts.”
Jackie snorted and went into the kitchen. “Ah, but first, you two shift. We’ve got work to do. Come help me with roast and tell us about yourself.”
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saiilorstars · 5 years ago
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The Beginning of Everything
Ch. 21: The Marchioness of Gallifrey
// Story Masterlist //
Fandom: Doctor Who
Pairing: 10th Doctor x Original Female Character
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Chapter summary: The travelers stop by King Henry VIII's palace on the day he's holding a celebration. He seems to take a special interest in Renata and despite the Doctor's efforts not to let it get to him...it does. It leads to arguments, accusations, a dance and a proposition of a thrilling night adventure together. The Doctor then starts to realize that maybe the Marchioness has caught him too.
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A/N: The pronunciation of 'Marchioness' is mar-shuh·nes
The TARDIS wardrobe was ransacked the morning the Doctor suggested the group take a trip into the past so Gabby and Donna could meet royalty. The idea stemmed from a passing remark Renata made the previous night about having to explain to Gabby how royalty worked in the future. The Doctor thought it would be a nice idea if Gabby and Donna could see royalty up close. Plus, it was always fun having a leisure day in the past. And after their recent trips full of danger, Gods, alien bees...they needed a leisure trip.
So as soon as he made his idea known, Gabby and Donna zoomed for the wardrobe room. If they were going to travel back in time to meet royalty then they would need to find dresses and jewelry and do their hair. The Doctor prepared himself at the idea that they would be spending a long time getting ready.
Renata, for her part, hadn't taken long. She knew where to go, what to pick, how to do her hair. She was done in half an hour and that was only because Donna couldn't quite figure out how to tie her corset. Now, Renata helped the two human women.
"I can't believe we're actually going to meet a Queen and King!" Gabby gushed as Renata finished doing her hair. She was sitting in front of a vanity desk and was watching Renata through the mirror as she did wonders with her hair.
"Gabriella please stop moving so much," Renata had to physically hold Gabby's head for a few seconds to keep Gabby still. "And I don't know why you're so excited," Renata said once she could trust Gabby to keep herself from moving.
Suddenly, Donna scoffed from the side of the room. She was getting changed like Renata told her to. She was next in the hair department. "Why we're so excited!?" Donna called. "Because we're meeting flippin royalty!"
"Yeah, but they're people. They're literally just people," Renata shook her head. She focused on pinning the last butterfly hair pin on Gabby's hair. "There we are. What do you think?"
Gabby once again gushed at her reflection. "I love it! You really do know how to do hairstyles!"
Indignance flashed across Renata's face. "What - did you doubt me!?"
"No!" Gabby laughed and went back to looking at herself in the mirror. Renata had curled her hair - proving once and for all to Gabby and Donna that she did know how to use a curling iron - and made a few braids to be left down while others were pulled to the back. The braids on the back were connected by a lavender butterfly pins.
"Alright, my turn!" Donna came out wearing an ornate emerald green gown with white lace at the squared neckline and cuffs. "Up, up!"
Gabby got up from the chair and hitched the sides of her baby blue dress to move around. "What are you going to do to Donna's hair?" she curiously asked.
Renata's hands were already massaging Donna's hair. She looked at Donna through the mirror with a warm smile. "I'm thinking we leave this fiery hair down and curl it."
"You're the Noble one," Donna laughed at her own joke.
"Oh Donna, I'm really not," Renata's smile had become strained but with all the excitement going on no one noticed.
"Course you are! Now c'mon! Before the Doctor changes his mind!"
~0~
The Doctor really had almost changed his mind after so much waiting. He would never understand why it took most women - and a few men - so long to get changed. Like, was there an invisible force keeping them from getting ready quick that he wasn't aware of? What was it?
Words could not explain the relief he felt when he heard Renata's voice asking their companions to calm down. She must have been helping Gabby and Donna get ready because as far as the Doctor knew, Renata never took long to get changed for a trip. He didn't know if it was part of her customs back on Gallifrey to be ready as quick as possible or if she just wasn't affected by the invisible force he wasn't sure existed or not.
"Please try to act normal," Renata was instructing the women when she strode into the console room. "Nothing gives you away like screaming and being all giddy."
"Finally!" the Doctor made a point of saying it loudly and as frustrated as he actually was. He started making his way towards the doors. "I've been parked outside the 16th century for hours! I thought you got lost in there!
"They did," Renata came around the console to check the monitor. She wanted to make sure he had actually landed them in the correct spot and not some alien version of 16th century Earth. "And then I found them. They're very fond of the 1920s. Apparently, the whole Agatha Christie trip didn't fill them up but they are ready - I got them ready."
"You make us sound like children," Donna huffed with her arms crossed.
Renata cast a look at Donna as she started for the doors. "In my eyes, you might as well be."
Donna rolled her eyes at the woman while Gabby giggled beside her. Just because Renata was right didn't mean Donna would admit to it.
Renata stepped out of the TARDIS to find a bright green garden field. She would've immediately assumed the Doctor had taken them to the wrong place if she hadn't caught a glimpse of a tall palace in the distance.
"Is that a real castle!?" Gabby squealed so loud that the others flinched.
"To be correct, it's the Hampton Court Palace," the Doctor began to explain. "King Henry VIII and his new wife Anne of Cleves are living there. The Hampton palace is known for it's incredible size and rooms. I'm sure you'll all love it." And judging by Donna's and Gabby's faces, he was right. "Shall we-"
"I'm off to meet royalty!" Donna happily declared before taking off first.
"Me too! Maybe I'll meet a prince!" Gabby gushed again and rushed off.
"Remember what I said about not being all giddy!?" Renata was left to call for them. "You're going to get us caught!" But neither woman seemed to hear.
"Ah, they'll be fine," the Doctor said with a tone that fully believed in what he was saying.
Renata wouldn't be so naive. She scoffed lightly and reached behind them to close the TARDIS doors. "Are you sure leaving the TARDIS here is a good idea?"
"Yeah, we don't want it too close to the palace. She'll be fine here. We'll be fine too so please relax." The Doctor was holding his arm out when Renata turned around.
"What? I am relaxed!"
The only reason the Doctor wouldn't scoff is because he would rather move onto something he'd been keeping back. "You look lovely, Renée."
He'd thought she looked right at home in such an elegant gown. She knew exactly how to best compliment herself, probably accustomed in her days on Gallifrey. She had chosen a gold and white dress that, under the sunlight, looked a bit orange. It had three-quarter sleeves and a flared skirt. The bodice had deep v-neck with the stomacher, in a whiter shade than the rest of the dress, covering her chest. There was a small, orange gemstone attached to tip of her bodice, perhaps bringing just a bit more attention to her chest. She wore a small, glimmering orange necklace. Her hair was tucked in an elegant low bun with two strands of her blonde curls left to frame her face.
Renata shifted for the first seconds while she figured out a way to not look like an idiot. The Doctor always got her like that too and it was utterly ridiculous! She was 756 for God's sake! She was a grown woman who shouldn't get mad blushes over a simple compliment.
"...thank you," she pressed down on the side of her dress, awkwardly clearing her throat. "I'm a bit sad though that I couldn't bring my sonic screwdriver around. No pockets." The Doctor smiled as he got the image of Donna shouting at him for assuming her wedding dress had pockets. Renata was none the wiser about it. "And I think I may have chosen something a bit ahead of this time period, but-"
"You'll be setting a style," the Doctor moved to stand beside her with his arm still held out for her. "What do you think? Lady? Duchess?"
There was a novel glint in her eyes when he asked. "...Marchioness."
The Doctor hummed and swayed his head as he tested the title out. "Marchioness Renata..." It made sense for her to pick that title instead of a Duchess which was the next higher rank. If he knew Renata, and he thought he did, she chose 'Marchioness' because it would attract the lesser attention amongst a group of royals. She never like getting so much attention, she preferred simplicity. And if he was being honest, the title sounded a lot better than 'Duchess'. The Doctor didn't know why it was, but it just was.
Renata curled her arm around his and pulled him after their companions. "It's an appropriate title given the fact I am a widow."
The Doctor went serious for a moment, knowing she was right. "Of course." She was being completely logical, as usual, but there was an unusual (and recently new) feeling in his stomach when he thought about Renata being married.
~0~
The Hampton Court Palace seemed to be in a rush when the travelers reached the entrance. There were carriages arriving and leaving, bustling employees going to and from and the employees not moving about were decorating the building and cutting the bushes.
"I wonder what's going on," Gabby remarked to the group.
"I bet the old chap Henry is having a party today," the Doctor said. "Very famous for those too."
"How are we getting in?" Donna inquired once they'd reached the entrance. They didn't seem to be lingering like they were going to think of a plan. The Doctor was leading them straight for the entrance.
"Oh, did I forget to mention I've already met Henry?" he flashed the women a smirk at the same time he pulled out his psychic paper from his coat.
"Oh great, the return of the lying booklet," Renata sighed lightly but let it be.
The Doctor presented the psychic paper to the guards and the male servant greeting guests at the door. "John Smith - known better as the Doctor - Marchioness Renata, Lady Donna and Lady Gabby," he read off so calmly and smoothly that no one would eve rethink twice about disbelieving them.
As soon as the servant saw the psychic paper, his eyes stuck to the Doctor. "Doctor, welcome back!"
"You do know them," Donna's eyes widened, gasping lightly.
"Good to see you too, Barnard" the Doctor shut his psychic paper. "What's it been?"
"About seven years, sir," Barnard gave a dutiful nod before glancing at the woman.
"Good, hasn't been that long yet," the Doctor mumbled. He missed Renata rolling her eyes at him. She only dreaded what kind of mischief he'd gotten himself into the last time he was around. Hopefully Martha had been around to keep him in check.
"And you've married," Barnard's hazel eyes flickered to Renata who still had her arm curled around the Doctor's. Her face went a rosy tint within seconds. "Your Most Honorable Marchioness." He did a courtesy bow for the blonde.
"Oh n-n-no! Not married!" Renata shook her head and elbowed the Doctor to get him in on the corrections.
He yelped from pain and tried agreeing while rubbing his side. "Not...married..."
"Widowed," Renata corrected. "Mr. Smith has offered to guide me and my..." she glanced at Donna and Gabby, both humans amused with the show, "...sisters to the city. I hope his majesty does not mind 3 extra guests to...?"
"His Majesty has decided to throw a celebration tonight. No other reason than to, uh..." Barnard trailed with a smile.
"To party?" Gabby asked, from now on putting on an accent to fit the sisterly role Renata had appropriated on her. It was surprisingly easy.
"Yes," Barnard nodded abashedly. "But please come in. I will inform his majesty of your arrival and appoint you bedrooms."
"Oh but we're not staying more than a day," Renata said, looking to the Doctor for some help again. She didn't think that they could last a day without causing trouble, whether it was by accident or not.
"The party will last two days my Lady," Barnard explained. "I believe his majesty will like it if you stayed."
"We'd be honored to," the Doctor grinned and glanced at the others. Donna and Gabby seemed to agree, Renata being a bit weary as they were allowed into the palace.
~0~
There was definitely a party to be held that evening for every room had servants going back and forth. Renata pitied the overworked men and women forced to prepare what would no doubt be a ridiculously huge party.
"I don't like the idea of staying overnight and making these people work extra," she quietly told the Doctor as a different servant escorted them down the hallways for the gardens where most of the higher-ranked courtiers and guests were. "Plus, I don't know how long we can keep this charade going."
"Oh don't worry. Henry and I are actually good friends - we've had jousting matches!" the Doctor smiled nostalgically. "It didn't work out for him in the end, though."
"Doctor, focus!"
"Right," the Doctor shook his head and offered her a reassuring smile. "We'll be fine."
"This way," the servant led them down the steps into the garden. "His and Her Majesty are greeting the guests right now. Barnard has made them aware of your presence."
"Good, thanks," the Doctor said, completely at ease unlike his two human companions.
"We're meeting the bloody King and Queen of England!" Donna was straining her voice so it wouldn't come out in a shout, but Gabby was squealing like a little girl beside her.
"This isn't going to work," Renata brought a hand to her forehead. "We'll be beheaded in an hour."
"Would you relax?" the Doctor shot her a look, almost begging her to keep quiet. At this point, he'd rather take the squealing humans beside them.
The servant left the trio with Barnard once more who then led them through the circles of guests mingling. The travelers immediately spotted the King and Queen at the center conversing with a couple and before they could even think about how to best greet them, King Henry turned and yelled for the Doctor.
"It is you!" the tall man threw his arms into the air and laughed. He waved off the couple he'd been talking to and strode up to the Doctor. As traditions called, the Doctor was about to bow but Henry took him into a hug. Renata, who'd had her arm around the Doctor's, was forced to let go and stumbled into Donna. "Been far too long!"
"Yes, yes, it has," the Doctor agreed with his own laugh.
"Oh my God that's King Henry VIII," Gabby whispered to Donna as she practically clung to the ginger's arm.
Donna didn't seem the least bothered by Gabby's relentlessly shaking her arm. She was so excited too! "I bloody know!"
Renata cleared her throat at the two, shooting them a stern look. Calm down was written across her face.
"I have brought a few extra guests for tonight's, uh, celebration," the Doctor said once he was able to pry the King off him. "I'm assisting them on their journey to London and thought we should stop by to see an old friend."
"Well of course!" Henry laughed and started studying the three women. While he did that, the women studied him as well. He was fairly tall, probably the same height as the Doctor. However, they differed in that Henry had a pudginess to his face and he wasn't as slim as the Doctor. He had a receding hairline but even then his hair seemed to be thinning. He did have a full beard though, shading between brown and a light ginger.
"Ladies, his Majesty, King Henry," the Doctor gestured to the man. "Your majesty, Lady Gabby Gonzalez and Lady Donna Noble..." he barely got to introduce before the two humans bowed.
Gabby immediately plunged herself a bit too low out of her excitement. "Your majesties."
Donna did the same, much to Renata's dismay, and smiled at the royal pair. "An honor to meet you."
"Stand up," Renata hissed under her breath and in doing so she claimed the King's attention. Seeing this, Renata did the appropriate bow and gracefully smiled. "Your majesties."
"This is the Marchioness of..." the Doctor struggled for a few seconds to find the appropriate land for Renata, something she felt guilty for because she hadn't even considered it herself. But, just like that, the Doctor realized there was only one possible answer. "This is the Most Honorable Marchioness of Gallifrey."
Renata's eyes widened and snapped to the Doctor, but even then she finished bowing and rose like she hadn't been shaken. "It is an honor to meet you, your Majesties." She could see the Queen was cautiously standing behind her husband, no doubt waiting to be introduced by her husband, so Renata offered the woman a kind a smile.
"Doctor, you married such a beautiful jewel," Henry's eyes seemed to spark with something that Renata hadn't been able to describe in that second. She was more focused on the incorrect assumption about her status...again.
"We are not married," she said with a strain in her voice. Henry looked at the Doctor for his confirmation, something that reminded Renata how badly this period was for women. Her word was not enough. Only the Doctor's words mattered.
"We're not," he agreed. He didn't miss the way Henry's face lit up at the news. What the hell are you so happy about? The silent question came in an unusual angry way.
"You're widowed, my condolences," Henry's tone didn't exactly portray the feeling of his words. He took Renata's hand without warning her, choosing to ignore the small "Oh!" that slipped her lips when her body was jerked towards him.
The Doctor did not miss it. Gabby and Donna giggled as quietly as they could when the King kissed the back of Renata's hand.
"You are too kind, your Majesty," Renata took her hand out of his the moment she could. "It was a very long time ago, though."
"Oh, really?" Henry lifted an eyebrow at her.
"Still," the Queen suddenly spoke up, "You have our deepest condolences." She did offer a genuine kind smile that Renata could take to heart.
At the reminder of his wife's presence, Henry stepped back to stand beside her to introduce her. "Doctor, unlike you, I have married. Her Majesty Queen Anne."
All the travelers once again bowed according to custom. The Queen, unlike her husband, seemed like a kind woman. Her warm smile was a charmer. She was a tall, slim young woman - if the timing was right, she was only 25 - with fair blonde hair tucked into a pony-tail hanging over her shoulder. She had a pointed chin and slim cheeks. Her dark chocolate brown, though heavily lidded, eyes gave each of the travelers a welcoming look.
"Honor to meet you, your Majesty," the Doctor said had the agreeing nods of the women.
"I have heard about you, Doctor," Anne confessed, a hint of curiosity etching across her face. "And if what my husband said is true then I look forward to having you at our celebration this evening."
"Thank you," the Doctor gave a polite nod of his head.
"Have your things been assigned to bedchambers?"
"Uuh..." the Doctor quickly looked at Renata, his mouth slightly opened.
"We had a carriage sent to London hours ago," the Time Lady supplied the excuse within the second, and she said it so smoothly as well. "We only have what we are wearing. We didn't know there was a celebration tonight. Apologies."
"No matter, we can supply you with the right clothes," the Queen said, glancing at Henry to see if agreed.
"Of course!" He laughed, clapping a hand on the Doctor's shoulder. "Anything for my good friend the Doctor and his lovely friends."
The Doctor had the light suspicion that Henry was really only talking about one of his friends.
~ 0 ~
"What's wrong with you, giving me that Marchioness title?" Renata was deciding whether to laugh or smack the Doctor. The group was taking leisure in the gardens much like everyone else was that afternoon while they waited for evening to fall.
"I think it's funny," Gabby chuckled behind them. "The Marchioness of Gallifrey?"
Renata shook her head at them both but there was a smile creeping across her face. "You two are ridiculous."
"I thought it was fitting!" the Doctor exclaimed. "You're the pinnacle of what every Time Lord family wanted out of their daughters. You should have been the Marchioness of the entire planet."
"Oh Doctor," Renata sighed and picked up her pace. "Look at us, focusing on stupid titles when we're in such a beautiful garden. Aren't they finishing up a maze around here?"
"Actually," the Doctor began, making her and Gabby stop, "You're thinking of The Maze that won't be started until 1689," the Doctor corrected.
"Oh..." Renata's eyebrows rose as her face flushed. "...miscalculation?"
The Doctor's mouth curved into a fond smile. "A bit."
Renata bobbed her head as she slowly turned away from him. "Oh, we can't all be like you!"
"Thank goodness, I don't think the world can handle another 'me'," the Doctor motioned Gabby to start walking with them. "Can you imagine that?"
Gabby chuckled. "I don't think I can!"
"Still, this place is marvelous," Renata stopped by to admire a bush that'd been shaped into a horse. "There are clearly some artistic hands in this place." She glanced specifically at Gabby. "Maybe we can find them for you. It'd be a good idea for you to meet some human artists and get new perspectives."
Gabby adored the idea. She'd already met an alien artist so it was only fair she met genuine human artists too! She spun around, her eyes scanning the crowds of guests in the garden. "Do you think they're here?"
"Probably not the ones who made this bush, but...I'm sure there has to be somebody artistic here," Renata took a few steps towards the girl, joining Gabby in the search for an artist. "Perhaps we should ask Donna. She's certainly made herself comfortable amongst the royalty."
The Doctor hummed in agreement. Everyone's eyes found their ginger friend laughing away with one of the Queen's Ladies-in-Waiting. It was truly an amazing sight because none of them had ever pictured Donna like that.
"She's even speaking like them," Renata brought a hand up to her mouth to cover her laugh.
"Hmm, truly never underestimate Donna Noble," the Doctor slid his hands into his pockets and watched in amusement as Donna retold a story about herself in London...in the same time period.
"Oh great, you're teaching them to lie!" Renata dropped her hand from her mouth and whacked the Doctor's arm with her other hand. "We're teaching them to lie!"
"What - I didn't tell her to make up stories!" the Doctor rubbed his arm and turned to Renata.
"Well, go tell her not to tell stories! She'll get us caught!"
The Doctor groaned, swaying his head as he once again cast a look in Donna's way. "No...she won't..." But Donna actually seemed pretty animated over the story she was telling.
"Doctor, this is not a time period we can so easily mess with," Renata argued with a very good point on her side. "I'm not saying she shouldn't tell stories just...maybe tone it down a bit?"
The Doctor sighed in resignation. "Yeah, alright." Who knew, maybe in Donna's excitement she might say the wrong thing. It was a long run back to the TARDIS.
"And you Gabriella," Renata ushered the young girl towards the crowd, "We most definitely can find somebody worthwhile for you speak to. It would be so exciting if we could actually find an artist."
"Mhm!" Gabby agreed.
"Tell you what, I'll go look over there and you take Donna's side."
"Right - wait!" Gabby's eyes widened with realization. "You mean I have to talk to all of these people!? By myself!?"
"It'll be fine," Renata gave a dismissive wave of her hand. She was already scanning the crowds for the most viable candidates. "An artist usually caries a different air around them. And around this time, they're primarily male."
"Oh! That makes it better!" Gabby fervently shook her head and stopped walking. "I can't talk to these men! I don't know them and what if I get caught?"
"You won't. And if you're that nervous about it, have the Doctor or Donna help you. Go!" Renata once again ushered Gabby forwards.
"But what about you?"
"I'm a Marchioness to these people, nobody would bat a suspicious eye at a widow trying to make small talk with men." Of course as soon as Renata heard her own words, her nose crinkled. "Oh...that sounded a lot better in my head."
Gabby giggled at the Time Lady. "Now you're sounding like the Doctor."
"Oh just go!" Renata shooed her away. She herself took the other side of the crowd and started going through the crowds, presenting herself as normally as she could.
She admitted that it was pretty simple considering this is more or less what life was like back on Gallifrey, minus the royalty. It was easy engaging humans in conversation when the topics were dim: jewelry, parties and the same old gossip.
"You are a charming woman, my Lady," Lady Margaret Douglas laughed at what Renata didn't think was so amusing. She'd only made up a story about a trip she supposedly took with another Lady in Waiting.
"I don't know if I'd go that far," Renata chuckled along with another Lady in Waiting, Susanna Hornebolt.
"How is it that we have never met?" Susanna asked after receiving a flute from a passing servant. "You should clearly be at every event his Majesty holds. A Widower who has traveled more than any of us is somebody who holds many interesting stories."
"I'm not the type to attend so many, uh, public events," Renata cleared her throat and discreetly continued to search through the crowds. These two women were possibly the most chit chatty people she'd ever met and so far neither of them had given her any indication of just who was at this event. Before them she had stopped by a few Dukes under the guise of a confused woman asking where her sisters were. That sparked conversation and while Renata did get a few identities of other guests, they weren't any artists. Before the dukes, she'd caught a Duchess and her brother. Neither of them knew the guests.
How helpful they were.
Renata thought that these two Ladies might have more information. She could tell Gabby was getting far too flustered to keep her conversations going. There was only so much the Doctor could do for her.
"Excuse me," Susanna had to part when the Queen called for her assistance.
"Look at her, so eager to help," Lady Margaret huffed beside Renata. She cast Margaret a puzzled glance. Margaret chortled. "If you stay, you will learn what truly goes on around here. Lady Susana, for starters, is a widower herself. She is in severe financial troubles. Everybody knows that she is searching for a new husband to ease her problems."
"Oh, and you're helping her by telling me this?" Renata couldn't help the sour tinge covering her words. It was too petty for her.
"Simply so you know to keep your own prospects under a close eye."
Renata's face contorted to a deeper level of confusion until Margaret inclined her head in the Doctor's direction. Soon as Renata understood she groaned and not as quietly as a true Marchioness would have. "For the love of - we are not married and we are not getting married! I am not looking for a husband! Is that all you people think about?!"
Margaret was taken aback by what would be considered an abrasive reaction in the time period, but Renata wouldn't take anything back. Why didn't anyone believe that she and the Doctor were only friends!? Was it too hard to understand the concept of friendship?
"My Lady?" Henry was approaching the women, instigating for Margaret to stiffen.
So that's how you shut her up, Renata silently thought.
"Your Majesty," Margaret did her dutiful bow.
"I wish to speak to the Marchioness alone. Leave us," Henry didn't spare the woman a look. He had said his rather cold words all while he smiled at Renata.
Margaret nodded and rushed off but Renata noticed the lingering look the human had on her. Renata sighed inwardly sighed. She knew what thoughts must be starting up in that human head of hers.
"My Lady, I have heard you were asking several of my guests about their professions? May I ask why? Not looking for a husband right now, are we?"
Renata literally forced herself to resist the urge to snap. "No...your majesty. I am not looking for a husband in any of these men. I was merely curious because one of my sisters has an interest in art."
"Ah," Henry's face lit up. "You should have asked me, then. I do love myself the crafts. If your sister is interested, we can allow her to view the portraits I have collected from around the world."
A genuine smile spread across Renata's face. "Oh, really? That would...that would actually be very kind of you. Gabriella adores all types of art so, really, anything you would share with her would be deeply appreciated."
"Say no more," Henry made a gesture for a servant to come by. "See to it that my Art room is fit for the Honorable Marchioness and her sister by tomorrow morning." The servant quickly nodded his head and rushed off.
"I truly appreciate it, your Majesty."
Henry took pleasure in her beaming face. "Please, it is the least I can do for one of the Doctor's friends."
Renata missed the emphasis Henry had put in 'friends' due to her search for Gabby in the crowd. She wanted to tell Gabby as quick as possible - the girl would be so excited!
"May I ask what are your interests?"
"What?" Renata's head snapped in the King's direction when she realized she was getting lost in her search. "I'm sorry?"
"Your interests, my Lady. One of your sisters is interested in the arts, and you?"
"Oh, uh..." Renata started looking away while she racked her brain for humanly qualities. "I...I like..."
Be simple, she told herself. The Doctor wouldn't complicate backstories so much. "I like to help people, teach," she settled for. Back on Gallifrey that's what she did. Teaching Gabby about outer space was a bit out of her element but when she was on Gallifrey, working her foundation, she knew exactly what to do. "I, uh...I do a lot of charity work. There are so many people, children, that require our help."
"Ah, truly noble of you then," Henry gave a small nod. "I do like women who are vastly educated. My wife, it seems, is not as educated as I was made to believe."
Renata pursed her lips. Queen Anne of Cleves was known to be an incredibly kind, docile woman with a German education...but not to the type of education that Henry had expected before marrying her. "I'm sure she is educated where it matters."
Henry bobbed his head but didn't outright insist on his opinion. "Do you like the study of astronomy?"
The smile that came to Renata's face was automatic when it came to that subject. "I suppose I do."
"Have you seen our Astronomical clock hanging on the gatehouse of inner court?"
"No, I have not actually."
"We must correct that. A woman of your education and beauty must see it." Henry offered Renata his arm and though he was doing it kindly, Renata suspected that declining wasn't an option. He was infamous for his cold, sometimes dangerous, behavior.
Just like she would on Gallifrey, Renata accepted something she did not want. She took Henry's arm and allowed him to lead her away.
From a distance, the Doctor caught them leaving. He was initially perplexed, almost thinking that the woman couldn't be Renata. But he would recognize those fair movements of hers anywhere, along with her elegant hair bun. Renata was leaving the party - where there were plenty of people - to be alone with Henry? That didn't settle right with his stomach.
~ 0 ~
Renata wasn't so sure about this alone time with Henry but all her concerns washed away when she saw the mesmerizing clock hanging up on the building. It was truly an astounding sight.
The outer rim of the clock was a stark blue, nearly matching the skies had it been a lighter shade. It had the Roman Numerals carved as the 24 hour segments. There were three more main segments - copper dials - within the clock, each donning their own brilliant shades of blue. A few golden and red decorative segments were between the rim and the second segment. The other three copper dials were rotating at different speeds.
"This is truly amazing," Renata laughed and brought a hand to cover her mouth. She was opening it too much for a King, she probably looked out of place.
But Henry was admiring her reaction. He was grinning, really, as she continued to gawk over the clock. "We have other clocks in the palace but I wanted this one to be different. This one can be used by our incoming guests using the River Thames."
"I think they could," Renata agreed with a fervent nod of her head.
"The central dial rotates only once per lunar month," Henry explained and pointed up at the baby blue dial in the middle of the clock. "It also gives us the time when the moon crosses the meridian..."
"So you can be aware of the tides," Renata finished his sentence, meeting his impressed gaze with a laugh. "Yes, I'm familiar with the concept."
"I can see," Henry nodded, now laughing himself. "Well then, the middle dial...what do you think it's showing us?"
Renata would've laughed at the human who thought he could challenge her, a Time Lady, with time. You are so cheating Renata, she told herself but she was simply having too much fun. It was her chance to show off for a change. "Let us see," she put her hands behind her back and took a few steps towards the clock. She raised her head and studied the second dial.
Behind her, Henry watched her with bemusement. The Marchioness of Gallifrey was proving to be as exotic as the Doctor. How he had found her, Henry had no idea, but he would be damned if he let the Doctor take her away.
"I got it," Renata announced and turned around just as Henry took the steps she had taken to be face to face with her. "It's showing the age of the moon and your outer dial-" she pointed a finger over her head, "-shows us the months and the zodiac. I also admire how you worked in the movement of the sun."
Henry's eyebrows nearly shot up to his receding hairline. "Marchioness of Gallifrey, you have just impressed the King of England in the span of 10 seconds. That is a true record."
Renata smirked proudly. "I do have my moments." The Doctor always told her that but she never quite believed it. Maybe she should start now.
~0~
Once evening began to fall, Renata and Henry returned to the garden. Henry then announced the party would start in one hour. Everyone was to report to the Great Hall starting at seven. Barnard was tasked to bring the travelers to their appointed bedchambers.
"If you need anything, please let us know," Barnard stopped by the last door which had been Gabby's bedchamber.
"Thank you," the Doctor said with a strained smile. Barnard gave a dutiful nod then left the group.
"I am so excited!" Gabby gushed once they were alone in the grand hallway. "And do we really get to wear actual dresses from this place!?"
"You better believe that I'm going to be wearing one of them!" Donna's eyes practically radiated with excitement.
"I think it would be nice," Renata agreed with a small laugh. "But please remember to keep yourselves as calm as possible. We don't want to attract attention."
"Right, will you be taking your own advice then?" the Doctor's sudden question put Renata off for a moment. He was a little surprised himself but his irritation got the best of him.
"What?" Renata laughed out of confusion.
Gabby and Donna exchanged glances with each other. They'd noticed that the Doctor had been a bit tensed earlier in the day and neither really understood why. He hadn't said anything to either of them - he barely uttered a word to them in fact - in the gardens.
"I only mean that for somebody who's intent was to blend in, you're not doing a very good job," the Doctor put a hand into his pocket. He glanced away from Renata. She arched an eyebrow at him, naturally questioning his words.
"What do you mean?" she heard the Doctor scoff and frowned. "Excuse me, what do you mean?"
"Nothing...except I couldn't help notice you practically spent the whole afternoon with the King."
It took 2 seconds for Renata to figure out what he was trying to say. Her eyes blazed with fury that would have scared anybody, but the Doctor was all upset on his own.
"I will not...I will not tolerate such an accusation!" she pointed a finger at him then stormed away.
"Oh, yeah, go off!" the Doctor called after her, but after a few seconds his face scrunched. He needed to know what she was doing the whole afternoon with Henry. He sprinted after her, leaving Gabby and Donna to do the same. "You know, I had the Queen asking me if I'd seen her dear ole husband this afternoon! I had to tell her that I had no idea where he was!"
Renata kept her fast-paced walk down the hallway. "Nobody asked you to lie!" she uncharacteristically snapped.
"You shouldn't have gone off with him!"
Renata came to an abrupt stop outside her bed chamber, turning quick enough to bump into the Doctor. "Why shouldn't I have? I wasn't doing anything wrong!" Her narrowed eyes met his and without him actually saying anything, Renata saw the doubt sprinkled in his irises. She deeply gasped, her hand moving up to cover her mouth as she stepped away from him.
Gabby and Donna each winced with that type of gasp. For a moment they thought something physically hurt Renata.
But nothing physically hurt, only her hearts. "Do you think...?" Renata could barely say the words without sounding like she'd lost air. It also seemed like she was trying not to scream right there and then. "Do you think that I was doing something...immoral with Henry?" Even saying the word, through all her efforts, disgusted her.
The Doctor said nothing but there was a terse air around him. His hearts were hammering under his chest, a loud voice in his head was screaming at him to take back his unsaid suspicion. Even if she had done something, what did he have to say about it? First of all, she was not his anything except his friend and second of all...he'd done something more or less similar with Zuriah. He had absolutely no right to even ask that question.
So how could he get the image of Renata and Henry out of his head? And why did it bother him so much?
His long silence answered Renata's question. Her face went red fast and she was scrunching it as if she was about to scream. For a moment, Gabby thought she might explode.
"I - he was showing me something!" she settled for an exclaim but every word she said was a risk that might lead to a shrill scream. "This stupid astronomical clock that I actually admired and I was going to show it to you tomorrow so you could see how beautiful it is!"
"Well that's..." the Doctor's mouth opened several times but there was nothing to argue about that. She was looking at a clock you idiot. "Just keep your eyes peeled for Henry. I know him and I know when he has someone new in his eyes."
Those words still didn't calm Renata down. "You are being ridiculous!"
"I am not!"
"YES!" Renata caught herself shouting and lowered her volume but it was still louder than a typical exclaim. "We were only talking! He was showing me a clock and do you know what else he's going to do?"
"What?" there was a clear sourness in the Doctor's single-worded response.
"He's agreed to let Gabby see his art room!"
Gabby gasped on instinct. "Really!?" Donna quickly cleared her throat, throwing a "Not the time" under her breath that reminded Gabby to stay silent.
"That's how he starts!" the Doctor shouted but Renata scoffed in disbelief. "Renata you are beyond intelligent! Can't you see he has his eyes on you!?"
"He was being kind!"
"Yes!" the Doctor's voice went high pitched there for a second. "Because that's what he does each time he wants a new wife!"
"Oh, that's preposterous! We all know he'll be meeting a new woman in a matter of months! He does not want me!" Renata's chest heaved up and down with her ragged breathing.
They heard the squeaks of shoes coming towards them. A young female servant approached them in a hasty sprint. "My Lady," she did a courtesy bow for Renata, "His Majesty has arranged for a selection of gowns to be brought in a few minutes."
Renata's eyes widened in mortification. She looked at the Doctor who couldn't be more smug that he was right. They practically heard her sharp intake of breath after that.
"That-" she jabbed her finger at the Doctor's chest, "-proves nothing!"
The Doctor swayed his head. "Actually-"
"Thank you," Renata told the young servant before storming into her room and slamming the door shut.
"You know I'm right, Renata!" the Doctor called from his spot. He opened his mouth as if to say more but closed it in the end. He awkwardly shifted until he was able to pull himself away from the door and storm away.
With a simultaneous sigh, Gabby and Donna turned to each other. What a mess, they thought the same thing. Fortunately, they both knew what to do.
"You take Renata!" Donna exclaimed at the same time Gabby exclaimed, "You take the Doctor!"
They agreed with firm nods and split after their respective Time Lord.
Gabby didn't even bother knocking on Renata's door. She burst in, demanding for Renata to hear her. "You're not going to seriously argue over some creepy King, are you!?"
Renata was sitting at her vanity desk, pulling off her necklace. "I am not speaking about this with you, Gabriella. You don't need to concern yourself over this anyways."
"Oh, don't give me that, Ren!" Gabby marched up to the Time Lady, stopping right behind her chair. "You don't like arguing with the Doctor and neither do I nor Donna."
"I wasn't arguing, I was only animatedly conversing with him."
"And yelling."
"Speaking in a slightly louder volume."
"Renata, I swear to God!"
Renata shifted in her chair to meet the girl's genuinely concerned gaze. "What do you want me to do? Apologize? I haven't done anything wrong."
"No, but you are ignoring the fact that the Doctor might be a bit right when he says King Henry likes you."
Before Renata could once again deny, or at least argue, there was knock on her door. "Come in?" Renata said, exchanging a look with Gabby.
The same young female servant from before had opened the door to allow an older man inside. He was carrying a chest that seemed pretty heavy. Behind him came two more female servants carrying smaller chests in their arms.
"My Lady, the gowns that his Majesty has sent for you," the female servant said as the man set the chest down.
"And the accompanying jewelry," one of the older female servants said as she and the other woman put the smaller chests on the drawer dresser.
Much like the Doctor had, Gabby fixated a sharp look on Renata. The Time Lady huffed but thanked the servants for bringing the things inside.
"Okay, so he might have a point..."
"He might!?" Gabby crossed her arms over her chest. "Renata, this guy is clearly trying to entice you!"
"And do you all think that I am so naive as to fall for it?" Renata stood up from her chair with new anger tracing her features. "I'm not stupid. I know how to take care of myself!"
"No one ever said that, not even the Doctor," Gabby sighed. She didn't want to argue like the Doctor had. That wasn't the way Renata would be listening to anyone. "Ren, no one is blaming you for anything. Of course Henry would like you - have you seen yourself?"
Renata playfully rolled her eyes but once Gabby saw the flushed smile, she knew that Renata was calming down. "Gabriella..."
"No, I mean it," Gabby helped Renata move around the vanity chair so that they were face to face. "You're frikin gorgeous. Of course you'd have the King of England falling for yah, though between you and me...I don't think he's the one for you." Because despite all her fears for them, Gabby was sure that Renata would be much happier with the Doctor. Gabby couldn't picture Renata choosing Henry of all people. The mere thought of it made her gag (which then caused Renata to half smile out of amusement). "But listen, I really think you and the Doctor should talk again because I think he was just trying to protect you."
Renata was quick to scoff. "Right, by shouting and treating me like I'm a child."
"Alright, so he didn't go about it the right way but you gotta admit that you were being just as childish as he was."
Renata turned her head away and instead went to inspect the small chests left on her dresser.
"Ren, do you really want to argue with the Doctor? You guys have seemed so close lately."
Renata opened one of the chests to find beautiful jewelry inside, but it didn't make her even half as happy as how she'd recently been feeling with the Doctor and their travels. Things had been going so smoothly lately. Each night when Gabby and Donna were asleep, she and the Doctor had their own little fun adventures. The Doctor would show her some rare, sometimes odd, places that would leave Renata with permanent wide eyes. Even when she got to choose, though her places were much calmer than the Doctor's, he would still have fun with her. It was amazing...and Renata didn't want to lose that.
"We have, haven't we?" Renata whispered, her lips curving into a small smile. Despite the Doctor's insistence to keep an eye on her health, they were bonding more and, perhaps, Renata often felt like they were once again the Doctor and Zuriah.
Gabby was relieved that despite everything Renata still continued to be a practical, logical woman. "Yes, so I say we get ready for this party and meet the Doctor and Donna there. I'm sure you guys can solve things if you're both willing to talk."
"You're right." Renata's agreement made Gabby sigh in relief. Renata turned around and with a brand new smile on her face too. "Let's get ready."
~ 0 ~
"Doctor! You need to stop!" Donna was doing her best to keep up with the striding Time Lord, but she was a huge disadvantage. "Doctor! C'mon! This dress weighs a lot!"
"Go to your room, Donna," the Doctor wearily said as he made a turn for his room.
"Oi! I'm not some kid you know! But you sure are acting like one!"
That jab made the Doctor stop and turn around. "Excuse me?" he frowned at her.
"Look at you, over 900 years old and you're still arguing like some jealous human bloke!"
"Jea - I am not jealous!"
Donna set a hand on her hip and arched an eyebrow. "Seriously? I'm not wasting my breath arguing over that topic. I'm more interested in how you're going to apologize to Renata."
There the Doctor scoffed and loudly too. "I'm not doing anything. I'm right and you know it."
"Well of course I know Henry's got his eyes on Ren but arguing with her is not the way you'll get her to listen. You could've explained it to her calmly, you know? There was no need to be sour nor shouty!"
The Doctor rolled his eyes at her.
"Look at me spaceman!" Donna commanded and, to her luck, he met her gaze. "It's just me, Doctor. Again. It's just you and me so please talk to me. I'm on your side and right now...you look bad." A light chuckle came to her lips. "Since when does Renata make you go all...like that?" She waved her hand at the Doctor's put-out face. She was trying not to be so smug about it since she heard the story of 1913, but the Doctor was making it clear as day what he thought about Renata. "Oh, spaceman. The uptight Time Lady has caught your eye too."
"Donna, don't say such...don't say that," the Doctor muttered and turned to continue on his way for his room.
"Why not? It's what I'm seeing - it's what I've been seeing - and it's what I heard back there," Donna went after him but thanked the heavens that he was walking at a normal pace. "You're smitten with Renata!"
"Would you stop saying that before somebody hears you!" The last thing he needed was for that to make its way to Renata. It was nonsense what Donna was saying, complete nonsense...
"Like Renata?"
"Donna!" the Doctor abruptly turned around, revealing a glowering face. "Seriously. I am not smitten! I am worried about Renata-"
"Right, and smitten."
"Donna," hissed the Doctor but with bare energy.
He was aware that lately he'd been having some specific thoughts and feelings about Renata and he honestly had no idea where they came from. But seeing Renata go off with Henry today set something off inside him. Up until now, Renata had always been with him. Whether they bickered or they had dinners or they were having regular adventures, she was always with him. He supposed he could've gotten used to the idea of having Renata with him...but he could feel there was something else. And that 'feeling', while small right now, was a bit scary. He didn't know where it came from - actually, every time he thought about it his mind would go back to 1926 where he had to kiss Renata to save her life. It was literally done to save her life yet there was a warm feeling in his chest when he thought about, remembered it...
And then 1913 popped into his head. There was so much that happened in that year, the instinct to be with Renata, to get to know her. He would never finish understanding why even his human version had been so enamored with Renata if he only knew for a short period.
"Doctor, I don't know what your plan is but I can tell you that being the jealous type isn't going to bring Renata any closer to you," Donna brought the Doctor out of his thoughts. "Plus...it's just not you. You don't shout at people, especially your friends. If you have some feelings that you're not sure about, it's fine, but please don't lie to me about it. I can see it in your eyes."
"Yeah, alright," the Doctor relented this argument with a heavy sigh. One argument was enough for him. "I don't like arguing with Renata."
"I know," Donna gave him a small nod of her head. "So don't go arguing with her you big dunce!"
"But I am right about Henry. I've seen him try the same tricks with his previous wives!"
"So then let's make sure he keeps his grubby hands off our uptight Time Lady!"
"Yeah - hold on," the Doctor pointed a finger at Donna, "Don't call her upright."
Donna scoffed in his face. "Now I know fur sure you're smitten. You used to think she's uptight-"
"I still do-" the Doctor winced when he blurted his words. Donna laughed and, despite his restraint, the Doctor chuckled a bit too. "She'd kill me right now..."
"Yeah she would," Donna leaned on him as she sobered from her laugh. "And I would so watch."
~ 0 ~
Renata and Gabby arrived at the Great Hall before the Doctor and Donna and the party was in full swing. Gabby's eyes dazzled at the dancers in the middle of the room. The room was full of people and Gabby was sure that half of them weren't even the same ones she'd met in the gardens earlier. There were long tables set against the wall behind the dancers and were full of food. Servants kept coming to drop off new plates and take away the empty ones. There were lavishing couches on the far left where people were mingling and, Renata was sure, they were doing a little bit more than just conversing about the weather.
As Lady Margaret pointed out, people were on the hunt for matches.
"Gabriella, stay away from that group," Renata had suddenly taken a tight hold around Gabby's arm.
"Hm? Why?" Gabby followed Renata's gaze towards the couches. People were just talking and laughing, albeit loudly, but she didn't see any harm.
"Just listen to my words and stay away from them," Renata pulled Gabby towards the opposite direction.
"My Lady Renata," Lady Margaret had cornered the two and was sweetly smiling, "You look darling tonight. Is it true his Majesty offered you an entire chest of gowns for tonight's occasion?"
"Wow, word flies fast around here," Gabby blurted and more-or-less glared at Margaret. She knew what kind of people that woman was. It reminded Gabby far too much of high school with the endless rumors and people who just loved to create and spread them.
"Uuh, yes, and I was very grateful for it since my sisters and I had our clothes taken to London earlier," Renata calmly explained, something Gabby admired because if it was her, she would've snapped.
"Oh," Lady Margaret seemed disappointed as she looked away, but it only last for a few seconds. "So it is true then," she said with a newfound grin on her face, "His Majesty has taken a, uh, liking to you..."
Renata's eyebrows knitted together but just as she was about to inquire what the hell Margaret knew, the King himself approached them. Lady Margaret immediately did the dutiful bow but Renata was too irritated to follow and much less make Gabby follow.
"Marchioness, you look beautiful," Henry seemed genuinely astounded with Renata's appearance but the Time Lady wished he would stop looking her up and down. "The color red was made for you."
"Thank you," Renata politely said and gave a nod of her head.
"Please, allow me to dance with you," Henry held his hand out for her.
Just like before, Renata knew that despite his kind request there was no actual option behind them. She had to dance with him. No one said 'no' to the King of England, not even her apparently. If I had pants and the TARDIS I would, she begrudgingly thought when she took Henry's hand.
"Ah, it is all true," Lady Margaret remarked as Henry led Renata away. Gabby craned her head at the woman, almost tempted to ask why she was still standing next to her, but Margaret was too engrossed in the scene. "You know, everyone knows that his Majesty is not satisfied with his wife."
"You mean the Queen?" Gabby's sharp tinge in her tone did nothing to snap Margaret out of her gossipy state. In fact, she didn't even notice Gabby was practically glaring at her.
"Her Majesty has failed to satisfy the King and now he is on the hunt for a new wife. The Marchioness seems to have played her game just right. Hm."
"Oh no," Gabby drew the line at terrible accusations. "Renata is not one of those women. Whatever you may think of her is not the truth. She only came as a visitor and she has no interest in the King."
"Gabby, what's wrong?" the Doctor asked as he and Donna approached the two women. He spotted Gabby's upset face as soon as he entered the room.
"She's spreading rumors about Renata trying to become the next wife of King Henry!" Gabby folded her arms with a huff, throwing Margaret another glare.
"What? As if!" Donna laughed beside the Doctor. "Ren could never do something like that!"
"I don't quite like the joke," the Doctor settled a hard look on Lady Margaret, but the woman seemed so certain about thoughts. "The Marchioness is a proper Lady and she would never do anything like that."
"Yeah? Well, she's accepted the King's advances and is even wearing one of the very gowns he sent her." Lady Margaret nodded towards the dancers, making the Doctor and Donna turn in their direction. "And she's dancing with the King right now. Not even her Majesty has danced with him and she's his wife."
The Doctor's hearts sunk when he saw Renata dancing with Henry. She looked absolutely stunning in her red gown, like a true Marchioness...or Queen. She had kept her tight, elegant bun and merely put a red pin on the side. Her ball gown was a deep red with flare cuff sleeves. There were a few gold and white stones accentuating her waist and the squared neckline. Her orange necklace had been replaced with a matching ruby-stone necklace.
But there was something that raised the Doctor's spirits, his hope, after studying Renata more. She had a very disgruntled face. She was upset. And if she was upset, then it meant that whatever Henry was doing was the reason she was so unhappy.
"Doctor?" Donna whispered to him, nudging him on his side. She presumed he'd once again fallen into doubts regarding Renata and she wasn't going to let it happen. "Hey, don't listen to her-"
"Lady Margaret, you should stop spreading such vile lies about the Marchioness," the Doctor looked back at the woman with a new glare, a harsher one that startled the woman. "The next time I hear one I will personally make sure you live to regret it."
Gabby actually burst into laughter when Lady Margaret rushed off in terror. The Doctor took pleasure seeing it too, but he didn't focus too much on it as he had something else to do. "Take care you two," he told his companions. "And stay away from that group over there," he made a nod towards the group on the couches like Renata had earlier then headed for the dancers.
"Seriously, what is so bad about that?" Gabby was left to ask Donna because she truly had no idea. Donna burst into laughter next.
~ 0 ~
"You know, my Lady, if you would like I can arrange for your clothes to be brought back to the palace," Henry was saying to Renata while they danced. She gave him a puzzled look for his words, but he just chuckled. "Or perhaps I can simply have an entire new wardrobe for you installed here."
"Why would I want that?" she asked.
"So you can stay of course. I have thoroughly enjoyed your company; your presence is a delight that I never want to end." He leaned just a bit too close for her liking.
She tried leaning away and when it failed, she resorted to turning her head away. "I thank you but I have my own plans. The Doctor and I have arranged to be in London by tomorrow evening, perhaps earlier." Perhaps tonight, she thought.
Henry scoffed. "Oh please, London will not have what I am offering you. You would be a fool to choose it over me."
"Then call me a fool," Renata met his irritated eyes. Her lips curved into a small smirk that only further irritated him.
"My Lady should truly think about what she is saying."
"I have always thought about what I had to say," Renata said quietly. "My error was to allow people to tell me what to do, to manipulate me. I have feelings and I think that there has only ever been two people in my life who have asked me what they were."
Her husband and the Doctor.
Her sister never bothered to - her feelings were an inconvenience that Renata needed to work on - and their parents simply accustomed themselves to ignoring them. The only things Renata needed to worry about were to always make a good impression and always act like a proper Time Lady.
Henry completely misunderstood Renata's words and so he did the only thing a confused man would do: disregard it. "Stay my Lady, and I will fill your life with everything you could possibly desire."
"A tempting offer..." Renata sourly remarked, her eyes darting to the side.
Somebody cleared their throat and to Renata's delight, it was the Doctor who had come to cut their dancing short. "Your Majesty, I have come to ask Lady Renata if she would like to dance with me." He specifically fixated his eyes on Renata, begging her to accept him at least for a bit.
Renata met his gaze and softened with relief. He still wanted to talk to her after their fight.
Henry barked a condescending laugh as if he knew Renata's answer would be 'no'. "I am very sorry Doctor, but she-"
"Yes," Renata said without a moment's hesitation and drew her hands off the King, not even noticing Henry's stunned face. "I would love to, please." She held her hands out for the Doctor, almost pleading him not to change his mind.
The Doctor took one of her hands and shot Henry a smile. He led Renata to a new spot where they could dance and hopefully talk in peace. He set one hand on her waist and held her hand tightly as if she'd be the one to leave. They began to dance just like the others but in awkward silence in the beginning. Each took their hold on each other as their first win. If they were still dancing together, then it meant they wanted to talk.
"You look very beautiful, Renée," the Doctor decided to be brave and be the one to break their silence. Plus, she really did look amazing.
Renata smiled at him. "Thank you, but I didn't accept the gown for any other reason than...it was really pretty." Her admission left her with flushed cheeks. It wasn't like her to do something like that after all.
"I wouldn't think anything else," the Doctor said and was disheartened to see her looking at him with doubt, doubt that he had created with their fight.
"You mean that?" she asked quietly.
"Yes, of course I do," he sighed. "I'm really sorry for what I said earlier. I shouldn't have - I should've never implied anything like that."
"It hurt my feelings," Renata said but averted his gaze when she felt a prickly sting in her eyes from tears.
"I know," the Doctor said, knowing she was purposely avoiding looking at him. He caused that too. "I was too upset but it's not excuse. You would never do anything like that."
When Renata finally gathered courage to raise her gaze, she showed her reddened eyes but with a graceful smile on her face. "I'm very sorry too. I don't like arguing with you, especially you."
"Yeah, I feel the same."
"You should know that I knew you were right about Henry. I was just playing dumb."
"Nooo..." the Doctor's feign of surprise elicited a light laugh from her and it was enough to make his hearts pick up.
"I know," she shook her head. "Not one of my finest moments."
"So...so are we okay?" the Doctor was cautious when he asked. He watched her intently for any clue of what her answer would be.
"Yes, of course we are," she smiled. "And if we weren't around such gossipy people I would hug you so tightly right now."
"Hm, gossipy wouldn't begin to describe them," the Doctor muttered. He thought about Lady Margaret and her foul thoughts.
"They believe I am after the King and perhaps they have a right to because I've been very careless," Renata sighed and looked down at her gown as one of the prime examples of her words. "But I couldn't care less about him."
"Oh he seems to care about you a lot," the Doctor said, making her scoff.
"He wishes he could have a Time Lady," she rolled her eyes.
The Doctor couldn't help the smirk that was quick to come to his face. He twirled Renata around then pulled her up to him, perhaps on purpose or simply fate, and smiled down at her. "You deserve only the best, Marchioness of Gallifrey."
Renata would've laughed if she wasn't so nervous under his charming gaze. If we were alone...' she started to think thoughts that left her face red, "If we were alone I might just kiss you...'
~ 0 ~
"So why on Earth did you even agree to go off with the King anyways?" Donna asked Renata once the group had left the Great Hall. The party was more or less done except for the lingering drunken people. Now the group were walking down the hallways.
"I did not go 'off' with anyone, Donna," Renata huffed. "Henry just wanted to show me the astronomical clock he had built on one of the buildings here."
Donna scoffed and mumbled under her breath, "Think he wanted to do a bit more than that."
"Look, regardless of his intentions, I actually had fun." No sooner had the words left Renata's mouth when all of sudden, she had the collective scoffs from the group. "Oh shush! I did have fun!"
"Of all the people to have fun with, you chose him?" the Doctor couldn't help the frown that marked his face. He was fun too!
"I don't know, I just...I was different. I wasn't the uptight Renata you all love to say I am," Renata shrugged, her lips curving into a wide smile the more she thought about it. "I was sort of careless, you know? He asked me-" she laughed suddenly, only deepening the frown on the Doctor's face, "-he challenged me to guess what some of the clock's functions were. He wanted to know if I knew about time! I'm a Time Lady, I basically cheated!" She giggled. It was a novel sight for the trio. Renata always held herself to a different, more serious, place so there was hardly every any childish giggles.
"Alright, I get it," Donna was beyond amused with the sight. "I mean, it wasn't really careless but I guess in your eyes it was since you're usually always, uh..." She was going to finish that with 'uptight' but she didn't want to ruin Renata's mood.
"Yeah," Gabby crossed her arms. "It's just carefree fun from your perspective but fun nonetheless...I guess." Renata sure seemed to think so judging by the grin on her face. "So can we see the clock tomorrow? Or...are we leaving tonight?
"No, you still have to see the art room Henry promised," Renata pointed. She would make sure that Henry lived up to his promise. "And you're going to see it. For right now, I think it's best if we all go to our rooms for some rest."
So, they dropped Donna off in her room first then Gabby - with the same warning for them not to leave their rooms until morning - and finally Renata.
"Now I'm going to seriously ask that you make sure your door is closed," the Doctor said, even showing Renata how to check the door.
Renata laughed softly. "Yes, alright. But don't think just because you happened to be right this time that I'll always listen to you."
"Wouldn't dream of it," the Doctor said, playfully rolling his eyes. He bid her goodnight and headed for his own room.
He wasn't planning on sleeping anyways but once his thoughts kept drifting to Renata and Henry, it was impossible to stay still. Hours passed by and he couldn't keep his thoughts from running away.
The idea of Henry trying to charm Renata was infuriating enough, but now he was thinking about what Renata said on their way back from the party. She had fun with Henry? With him?
"I've taken you to see galaxies but you have fun with him?" the Doctor stopped pacing just to scoff.
Well, she wasn't endangered or anything. She probably didn't have to run for her life. The voice in his head started making some good points. She definitely hadn't nearly fallen off a building or was carried off by a space butterfly net.
"Aren't you supposed to be on my side?" he frowned and looked up as if the voice was right above him. He exhaled. He was losing his mind.
You lost your mind centuries ago.
The Doctor's face fell flat for a few seconds until an idea struck him. He started grinning in the next moment. "No point trying to get it back. Might as well do something good without a mind." It's what he did best.
~0~
Renata was nowhere near asleep when someone knocked on her door. At first she thought it was Henry himself coming for her, an idea that enraged her and had her storming towards the doors to give him a piece of her mind, but then she heard the Doctor's soft call.
She opened the door to find him on the other side. "Doctor, what are you doing?"
"Same as you, not tired," he said and looked over her party gown.
Renata self consciously wrapped an arm around herself. "...I like the gown."
"It suits you, Marchioness," the Doctor smiled at her.
"What are you doing here?"
"I was just thinking...how's about we have a little adventure on our own?" he quirked an eyebrow at her, reminding her too much of the way his first incarnation would often pull the same stunt.
"I...I...what do you mean? Where to?" And there she went doing the same thing her first incarnation would do: be curious about the shenanigan the Doctor had in mind.
"I know that the King has a royal library all to himself. It's chock-full of books and other little trinkets he has around. You want to check it out?" The Doctor watched the curiosity fill Renata's eyes and, he dared to think, temptation. There was a small thrill that came with his idea and he loved it. He hadn't felt that kind of thrill in...in a very long time.
Unknowingly to the Doctor, Renata was thinking the same thing. It was the same old story no matter how much time passed. She would be doing whatever was expected of her, he would show up with a crazy idea, she'd pretend like it didn't interest her, he would persuade her...and then they would go off to do that crazy idea.
"We might get caught..." she weakly argued, but she knew it was a lost cause when the Doctor smirked.
"We might...or might not be..." he held his hand out for her and despite everything screaming that it was a bad idea, Renata took his hand. The Doctor pulled her out and smiled at her little yelp. He reached past her to close her door and then the two were off.
Renata felt like a child the way she kept giggling. It was why they almost got caught in one of the hallways. The Doctor had to pull them against the wall and motion her to keep quiet. They kept themselves pressed against the wall until the guard passed.
And then the run began again.
The Doctor kept a tight hold on Renata's hand all the way to the library's hallway. He poked his head into the new hallway and saw two guards posted in front of the library doors.
Renata poked her head beside the Doctor's and made a face at the two guards. "He needs two guards to watch his library? Who would want to steal his books?" The Doctor said nothing but slowly turned his head at her to make her re-evaluate her words. What were they trying to do again? She flushed when she got it. "Oh...right."
"It's no problem," the Doctor pulled out his sonic from his coat and pointed it at the end of the hallway.
One whir of the sonic caused a decorative table to lose its structure and break down. Renata flinched when the table legs hit the ground and the glassy smashed. The guards quickly rushed towards it thinking an intruder was afoot...and they were.
"And now!" the Doctor grabbed Renata's hand and scurried down the hallway together. The guards were too focused on the broken table to see either Time Lord sneak into the library.
Renata was in full blown laughter once they were safely inside. "I can't believe we just did that!"
"Me neither," the Doctor admitted after sonicking the doors shut. He turned around to face the giggling Time Lady and fondly smiled at her. "I'm impressed. Didn't think you had it in you."
"Oh I am full of surprises!" she wagged a finger at him then turned around to get a better look of where they were.
The library was a grand room with marbleized flooring. There were shelves and shelves of books. There were several arm chairs around the room, indicating that there was only one person allowed inside.
"Ah, those are...interesting..." Renata stopped exploring when she found a few animal heads mounted on the wall.
The Doctor came up behind her and gazed at the big ole bear head. "Henry's really big on hunting."
"And jousting," Renata's comment made the Doctor give her a glance. "He mentioned you and him used to joust. I can certainly picture that."
The Doctor smirked proudly. "We'd get a little competitive."
"You two were good friends before I came along. I would hate for your friendship to end because of me." With a sigh, Renata moved away from the Doctor.
"Oh...no, Renée," he went after her to clarify where he stood with Henry, "Look, Henry and I are friends but we both know what happens to his behavior in his later years. That's not really the Henry I met. The Henry I knew was far different than this old greedy, grubby version. He was fun. We used to have exquisite conversations about music and art. You should've seen us, Renée."
"Sorry," Renata still felt compelled to say, not for her or their situation but because it sounded like the Doctor was still upset over the loss of the Henry he knew years ago.
"Ah, don't worry. I've got new friends," he smiled at her and turned her for the bookshelves. "And one of my friends happens to enjoy sneaking about with me, so..." He grinned when Renata huffed in outrage.
"I do not!"
"You're here, aren't you?"
Renata's eyes followed him as he went down an aisle of bookshelves. He dragged his hands along either shelf, picking out books at random.
"Want a peek?" he tauntingly waved a book at her.
Renata thought he looked incredibly handsome right now. She needed to push those thoughts away. With a deep breath, she walked up to him and snatched the book from his hands. "Wipe that smug smile off your face," she said calmly and walked around him.
"Me? Smug? I would never!" He turned after her.
Renata took advantage of the entire room. She peeked at every book she could get her hands on, finding the humans' early concept of writing simply fascinating. Many things were wrong, which she pointed out to the Doctor, but the mere fact that the humans wrote with such confidence and research was heartwarming.
"Even in such primitive times they work so hard," she remarked after going through one of the astrological notes Henry had collected. "I mean it's wrong but, all the same...it's admiring."
"I told you humans are fascinating," the Doctor came up behind her with a handheld mirror.
"Too bad Henry, as educated as he actually is, he's also a bit conceded," Renata held the tip of the handheld mirror and gave it a light wave. "Not to mention a coldhearted murderer."
"Mm," the Doctor could only hum in agreement.
Renata returned the notes to its proper place. Meanwhile, the Doctor drifted towards one of the shelves on the right.
"Oh, have we gone to Paris for an opera show?" he suddenly asked after pulling out a opera somebody had written for Henry.
"What?" Renata laughed shortly.
"I'm thinking we should go one of these days."
Renata continued to laugh. "You at an opera? Forgive me for laughing but I don't think you could handle staying quiet."
"I could too!" the Doctor frowned, but she kept on laughing.
She backtracked with a hand on her stomach. "I don't...I don't think-"
The Doctor's eyes widened when he saw she was approaching one of the tables. "Renée!"
But it was too late, Renata's back pushed the table and tipped it over. She stopped laughing the moment she heard the crash of the ground. "Oh no!" she gasped with a hand over her mouth.
"Quick, hide!" she heard the Doctor exclaim and without thinking, the pair ran behind the first aisle of shelves. They took position at each end of the shelves.
The same guards from before came running into the room.
"Who's there!?" one of them demanded while the second guard studied the broken table.
"Just like before," he murmured.
"I think it's one of the drinkers from the feast," the first guard said. "Probably out of his mind. Come on out!"
Renata tried her best not to make any noises, especially because she felt like her hearts were about to implode under her chest. She threw a look at the Doctor at the end of the bookshelf, asking him what were they going to do. But of course he had a plan. He always made up plans to get them out just before they would get caught. If they evaded the Time Lords, they could surely evade 16th century human guards.
'On my signal,' he mouthed to her. She nodded fervently. He aimed his sonic at the window and with one flick, the entire window shattered.
"Over there!" the second guard ran straight for it, prompting the first guard to leave the table forgotten.
The Doctor made a nod at Renata to go now. The two ran straight for the open doors as fast as they could. They joined hands as soon as they got into the hallway and continued to run.
Suddenly, Renata saw them running down the hallway of the academy after nearly getting caught wandering through the classes and prohibited rooms for students. And it made her hearts sore. She felt as carefree as she used to be with the Doctor as Zuriah. They were young, they were full of adrenaline and...they were in love.
Even the Doctor got the faint sense that this was all familiar, a bit too familiar, but the running made him push the thought to the side for now. He yanked Renata down the hallway of her bedroom and finally slowed down.
"That was incredible!" Renata was laughing melodically beside him. She brought a hand up to her hair bun that was on the verge of falling apart from all their running. She yelped in surprise when the Doctor gently brought her from her side to his front. Her free hand had come to rest over his chest and her other hand seemed locked under the Doctor's free hand.
"You had fun?" the Doctor asked quietly though with his ragged breathing it came out a little louder than intended. They were both still trying to catch their breaths, they could feel it. Renata felt the Doctor's chest heaving up and down under her hand and since Renata's chest was pressed to his, the Doctor could feel her own heavy breathing.
"Of course..." Renata swallowed down and laughed, hoping the air would fill her lungs soon. "I always have fun with you!" She had no idea what her words meant to the Doctor, especially right now. All she saw was his grin making its mark on his face. "Maybe tomorrow we can, uh, I can show you the, uh...the..." She was beginning to lose her train of thought the more she stared at the Doctor.
Yet another thing he used to do during their adventures back then.
He really did have gorgeous eyes, didn't he? They were the same from his first incarnation, honestly, with the only difference being the years that'd gone by. His eyes was how he charmed his way into her life and got her to break the rules. He never had to force her; he claimed there was a little part of her that wanted to have fun and be carefree, he only helped her come out. She wasn't all 'uptight' as each of her incarnations had been, she did like to have to fun and forget about the rules sometimes.
Like right now.
Right now the proper thing to do was to step away from the Doctor and bid him goodnight, but she wasn't doing either thing. In fact, it seemed like they were even closer now than they were a few seconds ago. The Doctor had lowered his head to meet her gaze and if he moved just a bit forwards, their lips would meet too.
Right now, the right thing to do was to leave.
'If we were alone, I might just kiss you...' The thought of when they were dancing came rushing back, but Renata was too far-gone to blush about it.
And the thoughts running in the Doctor's head weren't making him want to pull away anytime soon. He just kept thinking about her running with him, sneaking into a forbidden room, their talks while they got around the room. It was irrelevant conversations but it was the fact that she was playing along with his ridiculous plan that made his hearts swell. Donna probably would've been bored out of her mind and Gabby would've opted for a much calmer plan. Renata just understood him, even if it was hard for her sometimes. She went along with his conversations, even comforting him with something as indifferent as his old friendship with King Henry.
Something about it was familiar but it wasn't what was bringing him closer to Renata. He was just drawn to her whether he could see it or not, and up until now he hadn't seen it. Now that he had...her lips looked far too taunting to let them go.
Renata's breath hitched the moment the Doctor let his lips brush over hers and whether she would've gasped or not she didn't know because she just let him kiss her right there. She let his hand go and brought it to his chest while he lowered his hand to her waist. He kissed her gently, keeping it slow and sweet, unknowingly the same as the very first time they had kissed centuries ago. Later on, Renata would find it ironic that even that was the same. As seconds ticked by, they found their (old) sync and moved their lips with one another like it was a slow dance. Renata felt her body tingle when the Doctor's hand reached up to the nape of her neck where her loose bun was about to be undone. He pulled lightly on the strands to then run his fingers through them, eventually making the whole bun come down. It didn't matter; it just gave the Doctor an easier access to her curls.
But a few seconds later, the two heard the running footsteps down the next hall.
Renata pushed herself away from the Doctor, eyes wide in alarm and not just because of what happened. "You gotta go! They'll catch us!"
As much as he would love to stay with her, he had to agree. Getting caught would completely ruin the night (and it had been such a good night). "Go into your room quick."
Renata nodded and ushered him to run. "Go! Run, Doctor!"
He smiled as if asking her 'When, don't I?' then took off. Renata hurried into her own room, closing the door just as she heard guards came by. They were still searching for the 'drunk' who'd snuck into the King's private room.
Renata quietly laughed to herself and came up to the side of her bed. She wasn't sleepy before but now there was no way she could ever shut her eyes. She pushed herself back against the bed's headboard and deeply exhaled.
You're an idiot, she concluded but there wasn't a part of her that was sad about it. Being an idiot led to such a fun moment, a fun night...and a pretty good ending. Her fingers brushed over her lips and soon found herself smiling.
~ 0 ~
The next morning, Renata walked into the Great Hall for breakfast and was amazed at how clean it was after such a night. It didn't even look like there'd been a party last night. She was about to choose her seat when Queen Anne called for her.
"Marchioness Renata, join me," she patted the empty spot next to her.
Renata read the room and instantly knew that this wasn't something the Queen would do often, but she still gave a nod and headed for the chair Anne motioned to. "Good morning, your Majesty," she did the customary bow and took a seat.
"Morning," Anne studied the nervous shift Renata did every few seconds. "I must say, your hair is looks far better when it's not in that strict, tight bun."
"What?" Renata's hand instinctively flung to her wavy curls left down today. "Oh, uh...thank you." A blush ran across her face at the reason why she'd left her hair completely alone. She could still feel the Doctor's fingers going through it at times. "Left it on a whim."
Anne smiled and reached for a piece of bread to place on her tray. "I'm sure."
It was then that Renata realized that Anne must still be thinking that she was after the King, her husband. She swallowed hard and shifted in her chair. "Your Majesty, I know there must be some terrible rumors out there about me and, uh, the King, but I assure you that I am not looking for a husband. I have no interest in becoming a...a mistress." Even the word disgusted her and Anne must have seen it too because she laughed.
"Well of I course I know!"
Renata froze in her seat, her eyes blinking rapidly for a few seconds. "...you...you know?"
Anne sobered from her laugh to smile. "Of course I do. I mean, I did suspect in the beginning but after seeing you at the celebration I knew my suspicions were misplaced."
"Wh-wh-what made you think that?"
Anne gave Renata a specific look that, while it took Renata few minutes to read, made it seem like the answer was obvious. "Lady Renata, I know what the rumors say about me, but I assure you that I am smart. I may not be smart about English culture but I know my German culture very well. You are not interested in my husband because your heart belongs to the Doctor. I saw the way you looked at him last night while you were dancing, and no woman looks at a man like that without loving him."
Renata's mouth opened but instead of saying words, all that came out was a heavy exhale. "Oh, you are...you are very perceptive."
Anne smiled knowingly. "I am. I also know when my husband is trying to find a woman. I am no fool. I know that he does not want me for a wife any longer. I shall expect the annulment very soon but I will not end up like his previous wives. The mistake they all did was to say no. I will not do the same."
"You're going to let him annul your marriage," Renata said quietly, almost feeling bad for her if Henry wasn't as bad as he actually was. It would be freedom when Anne got her settlement.
"Of course," Anne nodded. "So you see, even if you had been interested in becoming the next Queen of England, I would not have been that upset."
"But I'm not!" Renata quickly said, as if Anne would go back to thinking that. "I'm really, really not!"
Anne chuckled. "Yes, I noted that. Can I ask you something, though?"
"Of course."
Anne leaned closer to speak in a hushed whisper, "You and the Doctor are not from around here, are you? And those 'sisters' you say...are not your sisters, right?"
Renata's eyes once again widened. "How...why would you say that?"
"Because I have seen some of the portraits that Henry commissioned years ago and while Henry has aged...the Doctor has not. And the last time I remembered, there is no Marchioness of Gallifrey."
"Ah, well," Renata pressed the skirt of her gown, unsure of how to move on from here.
"Do not worry, I have no interest in outing you. Why would I? You seem so like your are so much fun!"
"Me?" Renata's eyes snapped up to meet Anne's. "You think I'm fun?"
"Yes! You seem to know what you want, you know what you're doing-"
Renata had to laugh this time. "Oh, your Majesty, you've got it all wrong!"
~ 0 ~
When the Doctor, Donna and Gabby came into the room, the first thing they spotted was Renata conversing with the Queen. She was smiling, looking as if she'd just been laughing. The Doctor thought she looked exceptionally beautiful today. Even the sun seemed to shine bright over her like she was a goddess.
"Well, you two seem better," Donna's remark pulled the Doctor out of his thoughts. He blinked away from Renata and noticed that Gabby was already on her way to sit next to her. Donna had stuck around to study her best friend. "She's not scowling and you've got your idiot face back on."
"Idiot fa - what!?" the Doctor frowned at her.
Donna smirked. "It's true, moving on. I take you talked at some point in the night?"
The Doctor immediately coughed as if he actually had something stuck in his throat. It was loud enough to pull Renata's attention and see him and Donna lingering by the entrance.
"I wonder what Donna said this time," Gabby remarked beside Renata.
Renata smiled lightly. "Oh, I bet she said something alright. That's Donna...and that's the Doctor."
"I'm just glad you guys are okay now...you are better now, right?"
Renata felt her face warm up so she did her best to keep it hidden from Gabby. She couldn't do the same with the Queen. "We, uh, we are." And she would leave it at that because even she was having trouble putting her thoughts in order. She would have to at some point.
"Your Majesty," the Doctor came by with Donna at his side.
"Doctor," the Queen gave him the nod to take a seat.
He was quick to do so and once he was comfortable, he flashed Renata and Gabby a smile. "Ladies." He met Renata's gaze and let his smile linger with hers.
~ 0 ~
"Oh, so this is the famous clock," Donna cocked her head to the side as she followed the movements of the clock hanging on the wall.
"I think it's pretty!" Gabby exclaimed and glanced at Renata and the Doctor, the two of them standing next to each other. "I can see why you wanted to show us."
"I thought it was beautiful and the fact it's handmade is another reason to admire it," Renata smiled contently. The astronomical clock would certainly be her favorite thing she saw in this trip.
"Certainly," the Doctor agreed. He would give Henry his credit where it was due. The clock was built beautifully and correctly. But that was all that he would give the King. And speaking of...
"Ah, Lady Renata," King Henry approached the group, choosing to ignore everyone else but the blonde Marchioness. "You disappeared last night from the celebration."
"Did I?" Renata scratched her cheek, feigning confusion. She remembered that she specifically tried to avoid him last night, and today as well.
"And then you spent all morning with my wife," Henry said so as if Renata should be ashamed for wasting her time. "Surely that could not have been pleasurable."
"Actually, her Majesty is quite interesting," Renata smiled and glanced at the others. They agreed with simultaneous nods. Renata and Anne seemed to get along now that their intentions were clear. "And contrary to what you told me, her Majesty is very educated. I think you failed to mention that she knows plenty German."
Henry rolled his eyes. "My Lady, let us not waste breaths on the Queen. I have appointed you a new bedchamber far more appropriate for you."
"Oh, uh, we are actually..."
"We're leaving today, Henry," the Doctor said seriously. "We were actually going to leave right after lunch."
"What? But the Marchioness has agreed to stay here," Henry met Renata's surprised expression quite well as he did not look the least bit guilty for making up the lie on the spot. His eyes practically ordered her to agree.
With a huff, she responded, "I most certainly did not. I specifically said I would not because we had to go to London."
"Surely you cannot be choosing to go to London over-"
"I said this before!" Renata exclaimed with another huff. "Did you not listen to any of my words!?"
"Probably not," the Doctor muttered. "My good friend Henry has selective hearing."
Henry scoffed. "Listen Doctor, stay out of my royal business. This is between the Marchioness and myself."
"It's really not," the Doctor scowled at the King. "I am here to assist the Marchioness and her sisters-"
"Oh please! We all know that's not true! You're after the Marchioness too!"
"Hey!" Renata cut in and placed herself between the two. "The Marchioness can speak for herself, you know!?"
"Shouldn't we help Ren?" Gabby whispered to Donna but the ginger was keenly watching the trio.
"No...I'm interested..."
"Your Majesty, with all due respect, I do not care for the fact you're making up lies. I thanked you for your offer but I didn't accept. I am leaving with the Doctor and my sisters today."
Henry shot a glare at Renata and the Doctor. "The King decrees you shall not."
"Excuse me?" Renata almost laughed but when she looked at Henry's face that wasn't lightening up. "You're...you're actually serious?"
"He is, Renée," the Doctor took her hand and tightly held it. "Because that's basically how he gets what he wants."
"That did not seem to bother you in our old times," Henry was quick to say, smirking as if he'd just proven a good point.
"Because you weren't talking about people!" snapped the Doctor. "You were talking about food! Books! Not people! Renata is not somebody you can snap your fingers to get!"
"When you are the King of England you can."
"I will not stand here and be insulted," Renata scowled. She felt her body warm up but it wasn't the good type of warm she'd felt with the Doctor, it was the sicky warm type she experienced when the visited Agatha Christie. She checked her fingers and was mortified to once again see the golden wisps of energy rising. She balled them up quickly. "Doctor, I...I don't feel so well..."
The Doctor side-glanced to see her face incredibly pale, not to mention her hand in his had become excessively warm. "Hey," he turned to her and cupped her face. Her eyes were blinking rapidly and he swore he saw something gold flicker past them.
"Hands off, Doctor," Henry ordered. "Or I shall call my guards and have them escort you and the sisters out of my castle!"
"Oh screw off!" the Doctor snapped, shocking the King.
"Doctor, we should get her back to the TARDIS," Gabby quickly said, her mind already going to dangerous scenarios with Renata's health.
"She is not going anywhere!" the King insisted but the Doctor threw him a glare that stopped him for a moment.
"We are leaving and you have no say in that!"
"Do not forget who I am, Doctor," Henry said just before he started calling for the guards.
"Doctor, we should run! Like now!" Donna exclaimed.
"Yeah, let's...run!" he told them. He grabbed Renata's hand and pulled them into a run. Renata was eternally grateful that the golden energy was gone by then.
"Gabby, I am so sorry I couldn't show you the art room!" Renata found time to apologize during their run.
"That's okay!" Gabby quickly said, yelping when one of the guards started shooting. "All forgotten! Let's just go!"
"Do you think we can make it!?" Renata cried after nearly tripping on one of her feet. These dresses were not made for running away! "You couldn't have let Henry believe for a minute that he'd won so we could have a head start!?"
"Oh, so this is my fault now!?" the Doctor threw her an indignant glance.
"No, well...maybe!? I don't know - I don't feel well!"
"Oh God, get a room later but for now just RUN!" Donna's shout echoed through the forest as they all ran their very best from the guards chasing them.
~ 0 ~ 0 ~ 0 ~ 0 ~ 0 ~ 0 ~ 0 ~ 0 ~ 0 ~ 0 ~ 0 ~
Author’s Note: Aaaaaand they kissed! Stupid idiots, but they kissed! It'll continue to pop up in the next chapters! And speaking of...ladies and gents, from here on out we are reaching the end of this story. I'm just going to tell you right now that I am not doing Midnight. I tried fitting it in with what this story is going to have but...I couldn't do it. After what happens in the next chapters, I just could NOT see either Time Lord going on the Midnight train. But I do make it up by adding a few original chapters towards the end (warning it's a lot of angst!).
So...just be ready for the next chapter :))
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dogtrainingspot-blog · 6 years ago
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Coaching Your Dog Humanely: Part One
Welcome the Dog into the Human World
Have You watched The Dog Whisperer and thought,'Wow, that guy is amazing! What a great way to train a dog!" I know I have many occasions. Cesar Milan instructs one fundamental principle about puppies - that a dog is a pack animal by instinct. In accordance with Cesar, your work is to become the pack leader, a dominant Alpha male/female with'balance'. I figure by'balance' he means you ought to deal with the animal fairly, since they'd expect to get treated at a wild bunch. He has really nice and quick results with this technique. I will not say it is a poor method, but it is not how I decide to train my dogs and that is why.
There is 1 thing quite Incorrect with the'you're the pack leader' notion - it presumes that the dog occupies a puppy's world, and also for one to restrain it, you need to behave as a puppy could, the Alpha male or female of the bunch. For nearly all dogs that are household pets that this usually means the operator will deal with the creature as though it'd just instinctual processes happening in its mind, no logical thought processes. To refute that believing go and watch both of these brief videos of Lucy's behaviour: Lucy Remembers Her Ball along with Lucy and The Vacuum Cleaner (links look in bottom). A puppy doesn't occupy a puppy's world unless it is in a bunch of dogs, roaming the wilderness like a wolf, bringing prey down and sharing its own kill. This isn't your dog. Your puppy would not pursue its dinner when it went starving for a week! It would no longer kill a raccoon and tear its own flesh apart than will your six year-old kid! Should you have this kind of animal it is a sure bet that it is a dangerous dog, one which causes individuals in your area to cross the road to avoid.
Should you become the pack leader, you have Descended to the puppy's world. Having done thus, the puppy will integrate nicely with other dogs, reside in a bunch thankfully, understand its location in the human package, and usually behave nicely, but it will not achieve its entire potential. When you embraced the dog in your loved ones, you did not make a decision to turn into a primeval growler, (that can work when you've got the cahones to back up the dangers ), you made a decision to present a creature to the human world. Since the 2 movies reveal, Lucy is a creature with human-like trends developed to the complete potential of her younger dog mind. She, like 99% of puppies now, belongs to a household, was introduced into human theories, and resides in a human universe. It is better for you to train your puppy to live well on earth, as opposed to you in its own, for the interest of your dog as well as yourself. You'll have a far better companion, so will the puppy. The puppy will learn how to love people above dogs.
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Lucy is a dog. Lucy will place herself The prepared based on where a individual puts their foot supporting a chunk. She properly expects how the ball is going to be propelled from the positioning of the foot. She cheats quite badly, coming at the destination of a pitched toy until it gets there. Her mind has calculated where you are most likely to throw or kick an item. Lucy knows how you'll kick a ball by simply shifting your weight from 1 hip to another, without so much as moving your toes! Greater than a goalie in soccer (soccer).
Lucy understands several hundred theories and controls, from Jump In The Boat, to Don't Go In The Street. She plays today but when she had been younger I would toss her ball to the road (a rural highway) and if she recognized that the ball had gone out of reach, rolling into forbidden territory, she'd wear the brakes and stop before crossing an imaginary line. That line was a bit of yellow rope lying round the driveway about 20 ft in the road. After she discovered the concept that the rope was removed, she had been permitted to venture out to pee on her I could expect her to not move beyond the imaginary line. This notion, Don't Go In The Street, is fundamental to a puppy being able to live happily in the world. It is the distinction between a deer or even a raccoon crossing the street along with your furry friend's thinking. It's heard that highways (an individual build not appearing from the puppy pack language ) are extremely bad.
Dogs Have logical thought processes. Dogs possess feelings. Dogs have a conscience. Dogs learn how to love. Dogs possess language abilities and may comprehend about five hundred individual theories with words. Not one of those things have a pup when you buy them, they're learned behaviours.
A Puppy can't do differential calculus, that is clear, but it can reason out how to control a person into giving food. Lucy has been given a treat each time she requested me to go pee out. If she gets somewhat thirsty, she's learned to ask to go out, and wait for thirty minutes and then return at the house to receive her reward. She will do so every hour or so until I've clued in and observe her. If she does not urine, the rewards quit, and thus does the manipulative behaviour as it is currently a waste of time. But this shows you a puppy can control people. It is not surprising actually; a puppy manipulates its owner several times over the course of the day. Should you wrap its leash, it is going to waken from a dead sleep and ring, pant and bark in the idea of going for a stroll. This is doggy manipulation. The dog is stating how happy they'd be if they went for a stroll, and you are feeling guilty if this was not your strategy.
So Higher justification aside, what could a dog do? It may learn. A puppy could learn so many things which you'd be amazed. If you merely instruct it what it must learn to operate well in a human universe, it might knock off your socks. Daily that Lucy and I wake upwe inform each other with hugs and kisses happy we are that we've got each other. Lucy loves people, so much so that she virtually ignores dogs. Can they create her meals for her? Can they throw her ball? Her stick? Her small teddy bears?
There is A Border Collie in Germany that may remember any of two hundred and fifty toys. Alan Alda of Mash fame visited this puppy for Nova on PBS. The puppy has all of her toys in a huge heap in 1 room. In a different room she's shown a tiny sample of the desirable toy (roughly one fifth scale). The puppy leaves, enters the area with the huge heap of various frogs, teddy bears, squirrels, puppets, dolls, devils, Muppets, rummaging round and returning immediately, and astonishingly, with the right toy. She does so perfectly, even if it is a brand new toy which she has never noticed before.
But once you've educated that puppy human theories, it is no Longer a puppy - it is a Canine Sapiens, a hybrid between puppy and Homo Sapiens (that is Latin for Thinking Man). It can't happily return to the package. Without needing to run this experiment, I moved to England for a couple of weeks and Lucy went into the kennel. The kennel is a member of a respectable breeder and Lucy had her very own'penalty box' (cage) placed in just a three by six foot . There were other dogs so that you'd think she would be OK, but those were'Pack Dogs'dogs the breeder retains solely for breeding. One traces, all of them bark. One runs round the yard, all of them run across the lawn. Lucy was having none of it, and their crude antics had her worried out. When I returned to pick up her she went crazy with joy! She ran across the truck around ten occasions barking, crying, tail wagging, face licking, and all manner of expressions of love. I started to talk with the breeder around England however Lucy jumped to the truck through an open doorway and barked off her head so loudly she couldn't be discounted. "I guess I'm being summoned," I told the breeder. Man, was happy to escape there!
This is Why many universities at the U.S. have ceased instructing gorillas and other primates American Sign Language in doctoral theses. After the research are over the creatures are returned into cages in the uterus. No longer riding around in automobiles for you! No more ice cream cones for you! The critters, capable of reasoning into a level, are back in cages languishing for the fantastic old times with their friends, not able to relate to another primates round them. The universities have determined that it is unethical behaviour to leave them when they have formed attachments for their coaches. You require a PHD in behavioural psychology to figure that out?
It may be frustrating to try teaching a puppy an Innovative idea. If you end up crying or becoming frustrated with all the dog back off. Stop. The issue is too complicated for her current state of comprehension and she does not understand exactly what you would like. The remedy is to split the issue into smaller measures. You did not learn algebra until you learned to count, add, subtract, multiply and divide. You did not learn to multiply till you learned to bring the exact same amount three times to itself. Dogs possess similar minds to individuals, except that they are somewhat limited in possible. But if you provide your dog credit for having the ability to think together with the capability of a 3 year-old kid, you are going to be amazed at what they could learn.
Your pet has a conscience. How do I know that? Your puppy dreams, and it is a certain sign of a bifurcated head using a conscious and a subconscious mind. The dog fantasies after a fantastic day, or even a bad moment. When they have had a fantastic daythey fall asleep and over five minutes go into the REM period of the sleep routine. REM stands for Rapid Eye Movement, and it occurs almost right off in puppies. In people it takes about one hour and half an hour. During REM sleep that the dog could be whining, barking, chasing, wagging its tail, chewing, eating gum, swimming. You will recognize a puppy who's dreaming when you see it, trust me, however, what that fantasy indicates is that it's a subconscious mind that is free to relive the adventures of this day. When it's a subconscious mind then it should have a conscious mind, since you can not have one without the other, unless it is in a coma.
The conscious mind Comprises the principles build - What I'm permitted to do, in addition to what I'm not permitted, but wish to perform. The subconscious mind includes the whole spectrum, memories, emotions, cognitive capabilities, but it is missing one important thing - that the principles build. It is ungoverned. Should you take that, then you take a dog's mind is built similarly to ours and is effective at a number of the very same things our mind can do. To love, to feel guilty, to believe, to want, to cause, to control, to anticipate, to comply, not to violate certain rules. A puppy learns over four weeks old to not pee in the home. Amazing once you consider it spent the first 10 months during its mother's breast. How then, in case it didn't have a conscious mind with a principles build? By instinct? By package mentality? No, from studying , which you'll be liable for.
So That is where it begins: simply by giving the dog some credit for having the ability to think. If you do not you will be treating her like The Keller parents handled her blind and deaf daughter Helen. Helen Keller became a successful writer and public speaker but only after a wonder worker, Anne Sullivan, made a decision to charge her with a mind that worked. Her parents had written off as peacefully. That is your job, to be the wonder worker for the four legged Helen. Do not charge your dog with thinking capability and it will not find anything helpful.
Your pet is Handicapped in lots of ways. The first is the fact that it devotes ten times more of its mind to scents than we do. It frees one tenth of its own mind to visual data than we do. A dog may have a cookie directly in the front of it, however if it is looking for it with odor, it can not see it. A puppy appears to close off its memory in favor of olfactory memory. When they're sniffing you can listen to the nose whoot, whoot, whoot, since they sample fast to get a hint. Additionally they move their minds when sampling in order that they know which path to proceed. You will learn how to divert the dog's mind to develop into a listener and a watcher whilst giving your own lessons. They will learn quicker when they understand they are being taught something. Having a verbal and visual hint, your puppy will listen,"Aha, the Master is trying to show me something important."
Your First Lesson: The Binary Method
I Have always had it simple training my puppy - I live alone. When you've got a household, all of whom are doggy pros from visiting the Whisperer, tell them to take a hike. If they will not go, then take the puppy outside for a walk in a personal setting. Be alone with the dog, span. No distractions. No dogs or people. You're the only sensory inputs which the dog might need to take care of. This makes the task much easier. When you have educated the dog one thing, be certain all family members and friends use the identical technique of communicating. The puppy has a limited capability, which can be large enough, but it's going to be wasted when it must find three ways to sitsix approaches to come here, etc. When it's your pet, take responsibility and get different folks to tackle the puppy on your way or leave the animal alone.
Your dog learns really Fast and easily with the binary procedure. Together with the binary procedure, the puppy learns quite a lot and very quickly. In addition they learn by institution. The binary procedure is the way we start a puppy's instruction and it works wonders for dogs or dogs that are new. The institution system is for afterwards, as soon as your puppy has learned the fundamentals and is ready for more. We are going to discuss the binary process first, and institution in later sections of the report.
What Is the binary procedure? Binary signals two. There are just two things your dog must learn from you. That is all, two. Everything else follows from there. Once they have discovered those 2 items, you have got it made in the shade. Your puppy will grow to be the very obedient, happy small fur monster on the road. And she will be prepared to find out more. After a dog has picked the binary procedure, there is no going back, she thinks like a person.
In my walks with my puppy, I show off her to individuals And let them know about the binary procedure. "There are two things your dog must learn and once it has, she can learn everything else. Do you know what those two things are?" I inquire. I am amazed at the answers I receive, and have yet to listen to the right reaction. "Patience and humility," one man says. I have not taught my puppies humility however, so I need to refrain from laughing at a few of those stabs at a really straightforward idea. Does he think I'm prepping her Divinity College?
What are Those 2 items you have to first educate your four legged Helen Keller? Here we go - Yes No. Yes, you're permitted to perform something. No, you aren't permitted to do something. That is the first lesson to teach your puppy. Once he/she has discovered these 2 theories, everything else you are trying to have it to perform is very much simpler to achieve. Two things, thus the binary procedure.
How Can I instruct the dog both of these Seemingly simple theories? First, substitute the term Yes using the term Okay. The term No stays No. So that is exactly what you wish to educate the dog. Alright, and No.
If You've Got a dog that does not like food, then take it Back, for a refund, it is likely not a puppy. If your puppy does enjoy food and is drawn to a specific deal then have a purse of these treats at exactly the same time. The smaller the cure, the better. Little treats allow you lots of repetitions of this lesson before the dog catches on. It may take many repetitions of a lesson prior to the puppy accomplishes, but it is going to surprise you how couple times each puppy has to be revealed something to find out it entirely. Ordinarily, a very simple notion is learned in below ten repetitions.
Inform The puppy the next,"Lucy! Watch!' And point to your eye with your finger touching your face below the eye. Do this each time you start a lesson. Repeat it a couple of times and then start the lesson. In the beginning, it is meaningless to the puppy, but it is going to pay off because the puppy will have heard YOU ARE TEACHING SOMETHING.
Now Put the dog at the Sitting place on the ground or floor. Say'Lucy, Sit' clearly and clearly because you get it done. The easier the control the greater. 1 syllable, how much easier can it be. After the puppy is sitting and just when the puppy is sitting, place a minumum of one little treat on the ground around one foot in front of her. Give her a treat for sitting. Leave another food in sight near by.
Always, always preface an action control Together with the puppy's name. "Lucy, Sit", "Lucy, Come Here." There is a really good reason behind this. The puppy learns its title , but more importantly, she discovers she is being treated at the instant. Whenever you're using a bunch of individuals and do not use her name here's exactly what the dog perceives:"... bla bla bla bla bla bla bla - sit - bla bla bla bla bla." The'Sit' got lost in all of the bla bla. The puppy has tuned out you as you are all speaking gibberish and boring her to death. Give the puppy a warning that something is forthcoming. First pause your speaking and state'Lucy!" Pause until you see her respond, then give her the control -"Sit!" , making the hands gesture as you can.
All dog training will be to Be accomplished with'theatre'. I feel the dog reacts to signs initially, and because they are accompanied by voice commandsthey will react to this latter on it's own at a later date. Always, always offer a control with hand signs or other sorts of visual cues to get started. I call it 'theatre'. I've a'Come Here' sign that my puppy can see and reacts to when she is too far off to listen: I flap up one arm and down from my side.
So going back on the ground already covered, inform your Puppy to'Sit' by putting her firmly but softly in the sitting posture. Give her a treat when she sits. If you say'Lucy, Sit', create a hand gesture by placing your entire hand. Any puppy that's worth its salt won't immediately comply with the command, he/she will lunge to the meals onto the ground. That is instinctual behaviour, to consume. Dogs, particularly Labs, can write the book on'There is food, therefore I eat'. That is exactly what you are expecting for the puppy to perform. There are just a few things that inspire a puppy more than meals, particularly a puppy.
Wait a minute. When the Dog pliers in the sitting position to make it to the food, this is where you leap in. Put your hands, palms and hands outstretched securely, right in the front of her face and say in a loud, unmistakably officious tone'NO!" Just like a traffic cop. No, means no, you twit, and if you proceed that automobile one inch I'm hauling your idiot supporting to jail. That is exactly what I mean by theater. The hand is throw aggressively, the tone of voice is intense and stentorian, and the appearance in your otherwise nice face is mean and nasty. You might also preface the entire charade using a'Psssshhhht!" Which distracts the puppy and gets its own focus on the origin of the odd sound.
As Soon as You've given her this quite Theatrical admonition, sit back down, and say"Wait until I say OKAY," highlighting the term OKAY by pointing into your lips. The puppy at this time is simply confused. After three or four tries to lunge for the meals she will sit down and wait patiently. She will not go for the meals. Ensure that she does not get food before she does exactly what you desire. This is essential. It is not unkind. You are using positive stimulation to find a desirable outcome. Your boss does it to you every week using a paycheck.
The Puppy has learned by institution to take a seat. It is from pleasurable stimulation. Each time I sit gives me a deal. The ideal thing to do would be to sit he'll give me a puppy treat. I really don't understand what the hell he wants but I do understand to sit. I really don't understand why he is preventing me from getting that food on the market, but he is nice enough once I sit , so I'll sit down.
After The puppy has learned to sit down and remain silent without lunging to your meals, then you'll allow her to receive it. You may say in a gentle and mild tone,'Lucy, Okay get it," and point to the meals.
Here Is What the Dog is believing. If I choose that food he is going to shout at me and place me back and say"Sit' again. I am not going for this. I am sitting here. If I sit gives me treats. If you have waited until your puppy is unsure of things to do at this stage, you've done the ideal thing. Your pet is afraid to choose the food and will not budge at it. It'll ask consent with head motions toward the meals. At this time it has not a clue what OKAY means.
So today you will show your puppy what acceptable Means, and softly lift off its buttocks the ground and permit it to approach the snacks, all of the while saying'Okay, Lucy, get it' in sweet tones and pointing into the meals. You might even transfer the food nearer until it is within reach for your first couple of iterations.
When he states OKAY and Pushes me toward the meals, he appears to be saying it is quite okay when I go get it. So that is what OKAY means. Eureka, I do it!
With Roughly five repetitions of the exercise that your puppy will have learned the distinction between Okay, I'm enabled and No, I'm prohibited. It really learned the 2 theories employing the institution strategy, but it has an instrument, known as the binary procedure, where all other behavioral theories are learned. Everything, from Come Here, to Heel, to Don't Go In The Street will probably be much easier to teach. A lot of things have to be heard by means of a dog. No pooping or peeing in the home. No jumping on people or other dogs. No downtime when not known for. Come Here, Sit, Inside, Outside, Go to Sleep, Get Up, Get , Stop That, Be Quiet, Get In, Get Out, Heel, Lie Down, Stay Here, Wait... the list is very long.
All Learning has to be bolstered. When you begin to learn multiplication in mathematics, your instructor will review inclusion . She'll also teach the innovative notion of multiplication using the inclusion classes as a stepping stone. "Add ten plus ten. How much is that? Twenty. Right. How many times did we add ten? Twice. We added ten two times to get twenty. How much, therefore, is Two times Ten?" Educate furry Helen, the Okay and No controls every lesson prior to instructing her Come Here, or to Wait Until I Say Okay (Stay). Furry Helen will be quick to learn that this concept in the three months old for a kid of eight may find out the times tables.
A puppy is very similar to a person in Intellectual developmental skills. In this 1 lesson, your four Legged Helen Keller has heard quite many vital things. One, you're In control of everything. Food, most significantly. Two, collaboration means Positive stimuli like food and love, defiance means damaging Stimuli, for example disapproval and refusal of meals. A puppy, as a part of a Family seeks acceptance and positive reinforcements and avoids unwanted stimuli. If it prefers negative stimulation you have got a neurotic in your hands. Neurotic dogs, like individuals, are created, not born, and Now's that the Time for Cesar to perform his magical since this is where his strategy Outshines others, rehabilitating a tired dog. Thirdly, your pet Has learned when you are attempting to teach it some thing to allow it to fit into A family of people. Finally but above All, the puppy will have Heard the binary process and may even learn how to ask permission like Lucy does when she wants to sleep on the sofa. She stops and waits for An OKAY before leaping up.
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chasecampen · 6 years ago
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Grove builder Rick Caruso reimagines Miramar resort with splashes of seaside splendor
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LA Times, by Roger Vincent, March 3, 2019
In a quiet garden at the Rosewood Miramar Beach resort in Montecito is a white marble statue of the Buddha, laughing while four small children clamber up his side.
The latter is a clue this is not your typical religious shrine.
The Buddha had only one child, according to texts, but resort owner Rick Caruso has four — and so the playful stone statue has a bigger brood.
It’s just one of the subtle references to the Caruso family that can be found at the new resort, which may be the most intensely personal — and upscale — project yet for the Los Angeles real estate magnate.
Caruso, who started his development career with a modest mall on La Cienega Boulevard, went on to build successively grander shopping venues including the landmark Grove, the Fairfax District “lifestyle center” that pioneered a wave of outdoor malls that meld shopping with food and entertainment.
Last year, he completed a $200-million village center for tony Pacific Palisades with small shops and restaurants evocative of East Hampton’s main street.
Now, the 60-year-old has reached higher still, completing his first venture into the hotel business with a splash that he hopes will earn the Miramar prestigious five-star and five-diamond ratings.
And it has prices to match, with rooms that cost more than $800 a night on the low end and reach $5,575 for a grand suite. Rooms over the sand begin at $1,075 a night.
Its nearest competitors are the four-star Four Seasons Resort the Biltmore Santa Barbara and the four-diamond Ritz-Carlton Bacara, Santa Barbara.
And though it is operated by Rosewood Hotel Group, a Hong Kong-based chain with luxury hotels across the globe, it is very much a Caruso property.
Among other family references are his children’s initials capping the directional arrows on a weather vane and the Caruso family crest mounted discreetly amid a leaded glass window overlooking the Pacific.
Then, point blank, there is Caruso’s, the resort’s swank Italian restaurant.
Patrons can dine a few feet above the sand, viewing the surf from high-backed booths intentionally reminiscent of Perino’s, a midcentury Los Angeles restaurant on Wilshire Boulevard that catered to the city’s business and entertainment industry elite for decades.
Caruso hopes the Miramar won’t change hands again for a long time, which is one of the reasons he added so many personal references during its creation.
“I build them with the hope and dream they will stay in the family until the end of time,” he said. “It’s just a fun thing to create a link between generations.”
On a recent chilly afternoon, Caruso cut a rakish figure strolling through the hotel’s Manor House in a snug gray double-breasted suit, wearing dark glasses and trailing behind his leashed dog Dodge — very much carrying himself like the man Forbes said is worth $4 billion. The docile golden retriever is his constant companion and later fell asleep at Caruso’s feet as he sat in the Miramar’s main restaurant, Malibu Farm, which serves farm-to-table fare.
Caruso appeared a bit weary himself, understandably. After buying the property for $50 million in 2007, he spent more than a decade working with the neighbors and navigating a complicated approval process that required applications to state, county and local agencies. In recent months, it was a race to get the resort ready for its March 1 official opening date, with nearly 1,300 laborers a day working double shifts.
And he’s had other duties in addition to running his existing properties and building in Pacific Palisades. As chairman of the USC Board of Trustees, he has faced tumult in recent months including the removal of Marshall School of Business Dean James Ellis and a $215-million settlement for former patients of disgraced campus doctor George Tyndall in a sexual abuse scandal.
Amid the tumult, he’s kept focused on his ambitious goals for the Miramar, which he proclaims are nothing less than “to reinvent hotels” — with a nod to the customs of yesterday’s leisure class. “The grand old hotels of Europe were more like residences.”
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Caruso has a reputation as a big-spending developer who packs expensive details into his projects to help give them the kind of visual punch that led the Wall Street Journal to call him “the Walt Disney of retail” last year.
The Grove and the Americana at Brand mall in Glendale reflect his bent for extravagance and his personal tastes, such as jaunty Frank Sinatra tunes piped outdoors and, at the Americana, an 18-foot-tall gold-plated statue called “Spirit of American Youth” rising in the middle of a dancing fountain.
At the Miramar, however, Caruso has gotten a chance to indulge the tastes developed first through his childhood in Beverly Hills and later through accumulation of the fortune that has made him one of the wealthiest businessmen in Los Angeles.
The resort takes some broad design cues from the Beverly Hills Hotel, which took its famous form during a 1940s makeover created by Paul Williams, a revered Los Angeles architect whose influence now pervades the Miramar.
Perino’s signature booths were designed by Williams, who died in 1980. The hotel is meant to have the look and feel of a grand 1930s home designed by Williams, starting at the black lacquered front door with a brass mail slot.
Inside, guests find themselves in a soaring mansion-style foyer flanked by a curving staircase made using Williams’ blueprints for a legendary home completed in Beverly Hills in 1933 for auto titan E.L. Cord.
Caruso explains that Williams’ granddaughter is a friend and shared Williams’ hand-drawn plans for the Southern Colonial-style Cord estate, which Caruso framed and mounted discreetly near the foyer.
The residential sensibility prevails throughout the hotel designed by a team led by architect Dave Williams (no relation to Paul Williams), Caruso’s executive vice president of architecture. From the front door, visitors can see straight through what looks like a casually elegant living room and veranda, past a wide lawn and finally to the ocean.
Most of the 16-acre site — almost as big as the Grove but with a feel much larger since little acreage is taken up by parking — is landscaped open space, which Caruso hopes will help put guests in vacation mode. “It’s to lower everyone’s blood pressure,” he said.
In addition to the Manor House, which includes a spa, there are bungalow-like guest room buildings spread along meandering paths. There are two swimming pools and seven eateries, including a poolside shop that serves hamburgers and local ice cream.
He declines to talk about how much the Miramar cost, but Bacara reportedly cost $222 million to build in 2000.
Pricey design flourishes and materials can be seen in all directions at the Miramar including a Brazilian walnut deck at the seaside bar, hand-painted wallpaper and custom-designed Baccarat crystal chandeliers in the ballroom.
Original artworks abound, including a 1937 Norman Rockwell painting called “Scout of Many Trails” in an event space called the Study and a whimsical Fernando Botero painting titled “Two Drunks” in the Manor Bar.
The sundry shop is a Goop store, founder Gwyneth Paltrow’s first outlet in a hotel.
Caruso builds in a way many other developers would consider extravagant because he can. “I don’t have investors,” he said. “I get the freedom to make decisions I think are best.”
But Caruso is ever watchful of his bottom line.
The 161-room resort already has 25 weddings booked, and he has other ideas for programming that Caruso has honed in his retail centers, along with advertising sponsorships and promotions such as “date night” and “Mommy and me” events.
He pictures people wandering up to the hotel bar after a barbecue “burger bash on the beach” and smiles as he contemplates the promise held by the resort’s two bocce courts — a bowling game that has become hip but is ancient and hints at Caruso’s Italian heritage.
“I bet the bocce ball league will bring in $1 million a year alone,” he said.
And Christmas, sometimes a slow period for seaside resorts, will be celebrated fancifully with decorations including trees for each room that guests can decorate themselves with provided ornaments or let the hotel staff do the job.
“When you allow people to have fun, you make money,” he said. “They become loyal, and they come back.”
Donald Wise, a hotel investment banker at Turnbull Capital Group, estimates that it will take five years to get the Miramar financially stabilized, but Caruso is in position to make it to that point.
Caruso “is obviously very well capitalized, unlike a lot of developers who have to put things together with mirrors.”
Indeed, the Americana at Brand opened in 2008 amid the financial crisis, but Caruso weathered that storm.
The Miramar is one of only a handful of hotels in Southern California that is directly on the beach, which gives it a competitive advantage, said Wise, who was not involved in its sale or development.
Rosewood, which operates luxury properties across the U.S. and some two dozen countries, could help deliver the top-level five-star and five-diamond industry ratings Caruso seeks, Wise said. If that happens, the Miramar would probably be the only five-star hotel in the world with an active railroad running through it.
Ten freight trains and two passenger trains roll through each day on tracks that cleave the edge of the property between the main Manor House complex and the waterfront suites, bar and Caruso’s restaurant.
To diminish its impact, Caruso raised the level of the hotel grounds. “The train loomed over you before,” he said. “We put a cool bar by it, and now it’s part of the experience” of being at the Miramar. The nearby beach guest rooms also are on base isolators to contain vibrations from the trains.
For many years guests arrived at Miramar by train, starting in the 19th century when the Miramar became a favored destination of the well-to-do including snowbirds from the East who would spend winter there.
The inn’s history dates to the 1880s, when landowners Josiah and Emmeline Doulton turned part of their farm into a hotel, said Michael Redmon, director of research at the Santa Barbara Historical Museum.
The Doultons soon named it Miramar, or “Behold, the sea” in Spanish. By 1902, The Times was reporting on arrivals of the well-to-do, such as the widow of a railroad magnate who arrived from Boston for the season with her maid and chauffeur in tow.
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The Miramar is remembered perhaps best among the living as an unassuming seaside getaway where families with kids and dogs could afford to spend a relaxing weekend nestled between the peaceful Pacific and dull roar of Highway 101.
The Doulton family sold the Miramar in 1939 to Paul Gawzner, who revamped the property and added a swimming pool. By the late 20th century, the resort was known to some for its air of “Catskill kitsch” — with its shuffleboard courts and waiters who once tooled around the grounds on bicycles, trays from the kitchen mounted on their baskets.
Gawzner sold the Miramar in 1998 to night club and hotel impresario Ian Schrager, who closed the inn in 2000 to make renovations. Work stopped as the economy soured and the partly demolished hotel became a local eyesore.
Toy manufacturer Ty Warner, who became a billionaire through his Beanie Baby plush toy line, bought the Miramar in 2005 with plans to renovate the property but ended up selling it to Caruso less than two years later.
Caruso razed almost the entire site, saving only the original owner’s wooden residence, which stands just off the hotel grounds. It’s being restored, but no use for it has been planned yet.
For now, Caruso is just enjoying his accomplishment of getting the Miramar up and running — a satisfaction he is sharing with his family.
The Carusos, including Rick’s wife of 31 years, Tina, have their own residence in the Manor House.
Gigi Caruso, Rick’s youngest child at 18, said she and her siblings are taking particular pleasure in the family references her father slipped into the development, including quotes from their favorite literary figures painstakingly inlaid into stones on the veranda.
“It’s so fun seeing all our personal family references around the property,” she said. “It means so much to us that he involved us in the process.”
The developer’s next planned venture is residential. He built an ultra-deluxe 87-unit apartment building on the eastern edge of Beverly Hills in 2012 and now plans to erect a bigger one nearby on the site of his first development on La Cienega Boulevard that housed a Loehmann’s department store.
But that wasn’t really on his mind as he watched some of his first patrons enjoy the food at Malibu Farm. Instead, he’s just settling in at the Miramar.
“It was years of work,” he said.
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tardisgirlepic · 7 years ago
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Ch. 3: “The Eaters of Light” Analysis Doctor Who S10.10: Growing Up, Love & Separation, the Doctor’s Fall
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Growing Up as a Theme
One of the themes of “The Eaters of Light” was about growing up, which can be tied to the cowardice theme from last week’s episode, “The Empress of Mars.”  Growing up can be metaphorical or literal.
Coming of age, facing fears, taking responsibility have all been part of the growing up theme.  In “The Eaters of Light,” we have Roman soldiers who are no older than 18 years.  The Picts were children, too.  Where were all the adults?  While 2nd century Roman Britain had different standards of age and fighting in wars, I’ll apply the coming of age, facing fears, and taking responsibility to them.
Last week, we had Colonel Godsacre stepping up and facing his fear of leadership to take responsibility.
“Amy’s Choice”
Amy and Rory had an interesting conversation in “Amy’s Choice.”  Rory, Amy, and the Doctor are dealing with the Dream Lord and the dream in the TARDIS.  However, Rory wants the life where they are settled and have a baby.  He was happy in the dream where he was a doctor and Amy was pregnant, but she wasn’t.  Rory’s feeling insecure that Amy wants to stay with the Doctor in the TARDIS.
RORY: You ran off with another man. AMY: Not in that way. RORY: It was the night before our wedding. AMY: We're in a time machine. It can be the night before our wedding for as long as we want. RORY: We have to grow up eventually. AMY: Says who?
I did not expect Amy’s answer about growing up.
“Human Nature” & “The Family of Blood”
The 10th Doctor, playing the 24th turned himself human to hide, and now he doesn’t want to go back to being a Time Lord.  At the end of “The Family of Blood,” the Doctor wants to give the beings who are after him the watch with his Time Lord consciousness, so he can remain human:
DOCTOR: I should have thought of it before. I can give them this. Just the watch. Then they can leave and I can stay as I am. MARTHA: You can't do that!
DOCTOR: If they want the Doctor, they can have him.
MARTHA: He'll never let you do it.
DOCTOR: If they get what they want, then, then
JOAN: Then it all ends in destruction. I never read to the end, but those creatures would live forever to breed and conquer, for war across the stars for every child. Martha, Timothy, would you leave us alone, please?
(Martha and Latimer leave. Joan hugs a sobbing Doctor. The bombardment on the village continues as Martha and Latimer sit outside, then she hugs him.)
JOAN: If I could do this instead of you, then I would. I'd hoped. But my hopes aren't important.
DOCTOR: He won't love you.
The Doctor wants to stay human, so he can love Joan, marry, and have a family.  This suggests the 12th Doctor is having this problem.  In fact, in the Doctor’s living quarters, there is a bowl of apples (yellow arrow) and a snake (white arrow) in the background, showing the temptations of the Doctor as a human in the Garden of End metaphor. The Roman crosses represent the 12th Doctor or multiple, thereof.  The human is the imposter and must fall.  And that foreshadows what is coming.
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The 12th Doctor
Missy and the Master are examples of what the Doctor can become, and with the mirrors, that’s a scary thought.  The Doctor needs to face his fear of himself, which resulted in his memory wipe. 
The 1st Doctor & Susan
Susan represents a coming of age.  She was becoming a young woman and developed a relationship with David Campbell. Wanting to see her have a normal life, the 1st Doctor left her with David in the 22nd century with a promise. 
DOCTOR: Believe me, my dear, your future lies with David, and not with a silly old buffer like me. One day, I shall come back. Yes, I shall come back. Until then, there must be no regrets, no tears, no anxieties. Just go forward in all your beliefs, and prove to me that I am not mistaken in mine. Goodbye, Susan, goodbye, my dear.
Love & Separation as a Theme
Love and separation come up in “The Eaters of Light” with Kar leaving her brother behind to guard the gateway to another dimension and fight the Eaters of Light.  However, love and separation has been a theme for a long time.  There’s Rose with the 9th Doctor and then the 10th.  Sarah Jane, too, complained to the 10th Doctor, how he as the 4th Doctor just dropped her off in Aberdeen and never came back.
Regarding River, we first heard about her feeling of separation back in “The Name of the Doctor.”   Of course, there is THORS, TRODM, and the 12th Doctor losing both Clara and River.  Season 10 is no exception.  Not only is Clara’s absence still a problem, but Bill, too, lost Heather, and then there’s Penny.
There’s also the open question of Bill’s mother.
And there are other examples.
We saw above how love and separation goes all the way back to the 1st Doctor and Susan. I’m betting with the theme coming up so much that we will see her, either in the finale or the Christmas Special. This seems like such a great family-oriented reunion, which would be fantastic for Christmas.
I especially believe this theme will come up in the finale and maybe Christmas special because Kar and Ban aren’t the only references in the episode to love and separation. There are several important external allusions, which lead to the expulsion from paradise.
The Opening: Visions of Outlander with Its Doctor Who Connection
The opening of “The Eaters of Light” seems so similar to the series Outlander, where Claire goes to Scotland and encounters ancient Celtic, stone monuments, called standing stones that broadcast sound, reminiscent of the Celtic music we hear in “The Eaters of Light.”
If you are not familiar with Outlander, it’s a series of novels that has been turned into a British-American TV series.  While I watch the TV series, I’ve only read the 1st novel.  Wikipedia says of the novels:
Outlander (published in the United Kingdom as Cross Stitch) is the first in a series of eight historical multi-genre novels by Diana Gabaldon. Published in 1991, it focuses on the Second World War-era nurse Claire Randall, who travels through time to 18th century Scotland and finds adventure and romance with the dashing Jamie Fraser.
From the beginning of the plot summary:
In 1946, after working apart during the Second World War, British Army nurse Claire Randall and her husband Frank, a history professor, go on a second honeymoon to Inverness, Scotland. Frank conducts research into his family history and Claire goes plant-gathering near standing stones on the hill of Craigh na Dun. She faints when investigating a buzzing noise near the stones; upon waking, she encounters Frank's ancestor, Captain Jack Randall.
When Claire, an Englishwoman, investigates the buzzing noise, she touches one of the ancient Celtic stones and gets transported back to Scotland in 1743. She finds herself in the middle of a skirmish between rebel Scottish Highlanders and Redcoats. 
After various events and several hardships, she marries Jamie.  While she still wears Frank’s ring on one hand, maintaining hopes of getting back to him, she wears Jamie’s on the other.  Because Frank’s ancestor the captain was a rapist and sadist, who treated the Scots as sub-humans, it does color Claire’s situation. Encountering the captain on several occasions, she witnessed his behavior first hand.  Jamie has had several encounters, too, some showing the captain in a most sadistic light.
Claire embraces most of the Scottish culture and comes to see the British as occupiers, another form of usurpation.  At one point, we did see her back in the present with a daughter by Jamie.  So Claire is living in 2 worlds.  She loves both men, but love has split them apart.
Gabaldon really liked DW’s 2nd Doctor companion Jamie Frasier, so she named her romantic lead character after him.  Doing extensive historical research for the series, she has become a noted expert on 18th century Scotland.  Her novels center on the time period of British occupation of Scottish lands, along with the skirmishes and events leading up to the 1745 Jacobite Rebellion.  Outlander gives us another usurpation reference, too.
According to HistoryExtra.com:
The 1745 Jacobite Rebellion was a turning point in British history. Believing the British throne to be his birthright, Charles Edward Stuart, aka ‘Bonnie Prince Charlie’, planned to invade Great Britain along with his Jacobite followers and remove the Hanoverian ‘usurper’ George II. Yet, argues Dr Jacqueline Riding, the reality of the ’45 continues to be obscured by fiction and fables.  
In June 1745, Charles Edward Stuart (b1720) had one key aim: regaining the thrones his grandfather, the Roman Catholic convert James VII of Scotland and II of England and Ireland, had lost in 1688–90 to his nephew and son-in-law William of Orange (who reigned as William III). This ‘glorious’ revolution had confirmed a Protestant succession, in a predominantly Protestant Great Britain, which, from 1714, was embodied in the Hanoverian dynasty.
The term “usurper” depends on which side of the rebellion one is on.  The English called Charles “The Young Pretender.”  The problem comes back to religion, the English Reformation, and Henry VIII’s break with the Catholic Church. 
Clearly, there is a theme of love and separation, as well as occupation, in both “The Eaters of Light” and in Outlander. 
In fact, Kar pours out her heart out about the usurpation by the Romans, which in some sense reminds me of River in THORS:
KAR: Let me tell you about the Romans. They are the robbers of this world. When they've thieved everything on land, they'll rob the sea. If their enemies are rich, they'll take all they have. If their enemies are poor, they'll make slaves of them. Their work is robbery, slaughter, plunder. They do this work and they call it empire. They make deserts and they call it peace.
The Doctor, having both Roman and Scottish connections, gets another ear full.  Clearly, the usurpation applies but most likely the 2 worlds for the Doctor are represented by the 10th Doctor’s dilemma of human vs. being a Time Lord.
We saw the dilemma with Bill and Heather no longer being human.
The Subtle Knife
When I watched “The Eaters of Light” with my daughter, she mentioned that it seemed similar to The Subtle Knife, a young-adult fantasy novel, written by British author Philip Pullman and published in 1997.  I’ve never read the book, or any of the 3 books in Pullman’s series His Dark Materials.  However, from what my daughter said, “The Eaters of Light” referenced it, so I checked it out.
It’s much like the Outlander series in that someone jumps into a portal and enters a different world, so to speak.  According to Wikipedia, in the second novel in the series:
Twelve-year-old Will Parry cares for his mentally ill mother in Oxford. When he accidentally kills an intruder, he runs away and discovers a portal to a parallel universe. In the seemingly deserted city of Cittàgazze, he encounters 12-year-old Lyra Silvertongue and her dæmon Pantalaimon, who arrived via a bridge in the sky created by her father, Lord Asriel.
The editorial review on Amazon says
As the novel opens, Will's enemies will do anything for information about his missing father, a soldier and Arctic explorer who has been very much airbrushed from the official picture. Now Will must get his mother into safe seclusion and make his way toward Oxford, which may hold the key to John Parry's disappearance. But en route and on the lam from both the police and his family's tormentors, he comes upon a cat with more than a mouse on her mind: "She reached out a paw to pat something in the air in front of her, something quite invisible to Will." What seems to him a patch of everyday Oxford conceals far more: "The cat stepped forward and vanished." Will, too, scrambles through and into another oddly deserted landscape--one in which children rule and adults (and felines) are very much at risk. Here in this deathly silent city by the sea, he will soon have a dustup with a fierce, flinty little girl: "Her expression was a mixture of the very young--when she first tasted the cola--and a kind of deep, sad wariness." Soon Will and Lyra (and, of course, her dæmon, Pantalaimon) uneasily embark on a great adventure and head into greater tragedy.
Will and Lyra are forced to retrieve a special knife that has the ability to cut into other worlds and through any material.  So here’s another reference to a doorway and a world ruled by children, like we saw in “The Eaters of Light.”  Will and Lyra fall in love, but staying in a parallel universe that isn’t their own threatens the destruction of that universe.  So Will can’t stay in the end.
This sounds similar to what happened with Bill and Heather at the end of “The Pilot.”  And the song from the episode “Love Will Tear Us Apart” seems highly appropriate.
Will’s father being a soldier and explorer may give us some information about the Doctor, but not having read the series, I’m going to leave it at this.  If you’ve read the book and have some ideas, let me know.
The Doctor’s Fall: Paradise Lost & His Dark Materials
Pullman took the title of the series, His Dark Materials, from English poet John Milton’s epic poem, Paradise Lost, first published in 1667.  According to Wikipedia:
The poem concerns the biblical story of the Fall of Man: the temptation of Adam and Eve by the fallen angel Satan and their expulsion from the Garden of Eden. Milton's purpose, stated in Book I, is to "justify the ways of God to men."
Pullman’s series, from what I gather, is a reimagining of Paradise Lost for teenagers.  In fact, His Dark Materials comes from Paradise Lost, along with the title of his first book of the series, The Golden Compass.
The continuing theme of expulsion from paradise, which we’ve seen multiple times in Season 10 regarding the Doctor, is foreshadowing the Doctor’s fall. 
Anyway, His Dark Materials is a really interesting phrase, especially since we saw the record label in “The Pilot” that the Doctor had is a famous trademark: His Master’s Voice, shown below.
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Tip: When 2 pieces of subtext sound similar, especially with odd spellings or phrasing, they may very well be related.  This is an exception to our rule requiring 3 occurrences to make a pattern.
I didn’t have time in “The Pilot” analysis to explain more about the label because it’s part of a complicated set of metaphors.  The metaphors were very relevant to the “Smile” analysis, so I explained more about the label there.  Long story short, it leads to the parody of the painting The Creation of the World and the Expulsion from Paradise.
Since this all lines up in various ways, I have no doubt my daughter is right about The Subtle Knife connection to “The Eaters of Light.” There’s much more that connects that we’ll examine below.
The Fallen Angel Theme & the Legend of the Blue Box
I’ve wanted to talk about the fallen angel theme for a long time, but I haven’t because of time. However, I need to now, especially because this comes up in multiple ways in “The Eaters of Light.”  And it ties back into several other things we’ve examined.  The Vestal Virgin 2nd Class and the angel reference, as well as the demon and sainted physician from the Legend of the Blue Box.
The big reference to Satan in DW is in the 10th Doctor Ood story “The Satan Pit.” However, it’s Satan’s name “Lucifer” that is of interest here.  I want to draw a distinction between Satan and Lucifer, which I’ll explain in a few minutes. 
The Name Lucifer & DW Characters with Derivative Names
Lucifer literally is "the morning star, bearer of light," derived from luc-, lux "light" and -fer "bearing."
According to Merriam Webster’s Word Central,
What we sometimes call "the morning star" is really the planet Venus. The Romans called it Lucifer, meaning "bearer of light," because it appeared in the sky just before sunrise. So when, in the Old Testament, the prophet Isaiah says, in describing the downfall of the king of Babylon, "How are you fallen from heaven, O Morning Star, son of dawn," the "Morning Star" became Lucifer in the Latin translation. Early Christians thought that Isaiah was also referring to the devil, who had likewise "fallen from heaven." Thus the word Lucifer came to be applied to the devil.
Lucifer was not always seen as the devil.  In fact, according to Wikipedia, 2 bishops of the early Christian Church bore the name Lucifer.  It goes on to say
In Latin, the word is applied to John the Baptist and is used as a title of Jesus himself in several early Christian hymns. The morning hymn Lucis largitor splendide of Hilary contains the line: "Tu verus mundi lucifer" (you are the true light bringer of the world).
In fact, it’s only later that Lucifer came to be used as a proper name:
Later Christian tradition came to use the Latin word for "morning star," lucifer, as a proper name ("Lucifer") for the devil; as he was before his fall. As a result, "'Lucifer' has become a by-word for Satan / the Devil in the church and in popular literature", as in Dante Alighieri's Inferno, Joost van den Vondel's Lucifer and John Milton's Paradise Lost. However, the Latin word never came to be used almost exclusively, as in English, in this way, and was applied to others also, including Jesus. The image of a morning star fallen from the sky is generally believed among scholars to have a parallel in Canaanite mythology.
I’m making a distinction, and I can best show you why with an example.  The Doctor going hell bent through the universe and causing its destruction could easily be seen as Satan.  However, what if the Doctor is in a universe, like alternate-Donna in “Turn Left,” that needs to die to restore the real universe?  He could be seen as Satan in one and a savior in another.
Because DW uses derivative names with the Latin roots luc- and lux, they relate to the name Lucifer.  For now, I don’t want to apply judgment of good or evil to these characters. I can’t think of any instance where people with the Latin roots luc- and lux in their names are not also mirrors or dark mirrors of the Doctor.
Here are just a few examples of characters related to Lucifer.
Lucius in “The Eaters of Light” Lucius, for example in “The Eaters of Light,” comes from the Latin root lux and the Latin verb lucere "to shine." So he has a connection to Lucifer. In fact Lucius was also called “Granddad,” which Bill questioned
THRACIUS: Why are you even listening to her, Grandad? LUCIUS: Because no one else is saying anything. We need a plan. A real commander would have a plan. BILL: Why did he call you Grandad? LUCIUS: They always call me Grandad. I'm in command. I'm the oldest one left. BILL: How old are you? LUCIUS: Eighteen.
“Granddad” is a metaphor for the Doctor, so Lucius is a mirror of the Doctor.  He is foreshadowing what is going to happen.
He integrates in a way with Kar to stand together to fight the bigger monster, although it’s a losing battle.  It’s the Doctor joining his duality together.
“The Fires of Pompeii” & Lucius Petrus Dextrus Lucius Petrus Dextrus was the Chief Augur of Pompeii in 79 AD, shown below, along with Peter Capaldi’s character Lobus Caecilius and his wife Metella.  He supported the Cult of Vulcan, who wanted to convert the population of the world into more Pyroviles.
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Lucius has the gift of prophecy, so he is a dark mirror of the Doctor.
BTW, I’m not sure if I mentioned a wolf connection regarding Caecilius.  Lobus, while meaning lobe, pod, or husk in Latin, is very close to the Spanish word for wolf: lobo.
CAL: Charlotte Abigail Lux, “Silence in the Library” & “Forest of the Dead” We know CAL is a mirror of the Doctor, and her last name tells us this, too.  Not only that, but Charlotte Abigail Lux’s father, Felman Lux, built the Library for her.  Felman is an interesting name, especially when we are talking about the Fall of Man and the fall of the Doctor.
Strackman Lux was the grandson of Felman Lux, and the person who led River’s expedition into the Library. He said it took 3 generations to figure out how to get into the sealed Library.  He represents the 3rd, which corresponds to a triad of Doctors. Strackman, shown below from a TARDIS Wikia image, reminds me of Strax with that suit, and the name is really close.
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“The Rebel Flesh” & “The Almost People”
Jennifer Lucas in “The Rebel Flesh” and “The Almost People” has luc- in her name.  In fact, Lucas is a cognate of Lucius.
In Conclusion
There is a lot of overlap of themes in this chapter of growing up; taking responsibility, which means getting kicked out of paradise; and falling.  I’m hanging onto my hat for the wild ride of how all of this foreshadows the finale.
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whitewolfofwinterfell · 8 years ago
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Hey, I just read your meta on amy and eleven and omg it was beautiful. Do you have any thought on twelve/clara though ?
Hey there! Aw, thank you so much. I’m so glad you liked it. Eleven and Amy are one of my ultimate OTP’s so I loved writing it so much.
I actually stopped watching the show at the end of season 8, so my thoughts on Twelve and Clara won’t be nearly as developed or in-depth as they were for Eleven and Amy. Having said this, I’m more than happy to share my thoughts with you, but they will only be based upon what I know of them from season 8.
Twelve and Clara actually have a lot of parallels with Eleven and Amy, but particularly regarding the whole what are they question. Are they friends, family or more? Are their feelings for one another platonic or romantic? Personally, I would define their relationship as ‘it’s complicated’, because boy, is it complicated. There is, however, an easy way to simplify it.
With Eleven, things for Clara were completely uncomplicated. She was instantly taken with him, she respected him, was in awe of him, she utterly adored him. There was never any question of that from her, Eleven or us as the audience. But then the Doctor regenerated.
Clara’s reaction to it was negative, to say the least. She was confused, resistant and she was grieving. That’s what’s often taken for-granted when the Doctor regenerates - although he doesn’t technically die, the Doctor he is at that particular time does die. The Doctor didn’t just regenerate into Twelve, Eleven died and Clara lost him. She was lucky enough to have one final phone call from him, but she never got to see him again, he was gone. Forever. She needed time to deal with that and to process it, which is fair and reasonable, but there was almost a feeling of hostility that was born from that moment that continued to bleed into Clara’s relationship with Twelve in season 8.
It’s a difficult subject to analyse and interpret, because the only comparison we have to draw on is Nine’s regeneration into Ten at the end of season 1 and Rose’s reaction to it. In the beginning she had a somewhat similar reaction to Clara: confusion, reluctance, resistance, sadness. She felt a sense of loss, just as Clara did, but I think the main difference is that Rose came to accept and realise that the Doctor was still the Doctor naturally. She saw it herself. She saw the Doctor in Ten, could feel that he was still there with her and when she realised that her behaviour towards Ten and her feelings for him were exactly the same as they were with Nine. That didn’t happen with Clara.
No matter what he said or did Clara just couldn’t see the Doctor in Twelve and Twelve even said himself:
“You look at me and you can’t see me. Have you any idea what that’s like? I’m not on the phone I’m right here. Standing in front of you. Please, just see me.”
The reason that Clara accepted the Doctor’s regeneration and finally embraced Twelve, is because Eleven told her to.
“The man you are with right now, the man I hope you are with, believe me he is more scared than anything you can imagine right now. And he needs you.”
The fact that Clara needed to speak to Eleven to hear those words from him to accept Twelve makes me wonder what would’ve happened if Eleven had never made that phone call. Also, Clara didn’t swing right back to being how she was with the Doctor before, her behaviour seemed different (not in a negative way, just different) and her feelings definitely were. I strongly believe Clara had romantic feelings for Eleven, but after regeneration that seemed to be gone. Clara even said herself in a conversation with Jenny:
“If Vastra changed, if she was different, if she wasn’t the person you liked…”
That made it clear how Clara felt about Twelve. She didn’t see the Doctor, she saw not Eleven. He wasn’t the person she liked anymore, he wasn’t the person she loved anymore. In a conversation Vastra actually called Clara out on that. Here are some important snippets:
“He looked like your dashing young gentleman friend. Your lover, even. But he is the Doctor. He has walked this universe for centuries untold, he has seen stars fall to dust. You might as well flirt with a mountain range.”
She also goes on to make a point that Eleven looking young and flirting with Clara was for everyone, not her. It was something he did to be accepted.
“I wear a veil to keep from view what many are pleased to call my disfigurement. I do not wear it as a courtesy to such people, but as a judgement on the quality of their hearts. The Doctor regenerated in your presence. The young man disappeared, the veil lifted. He trusted you. Are you judging him?”
This that Vastra said makes a very important point, and points out one very fundamental thing that Clara didn’t seem to understand. The Doctor is the Doctor. Regardless of whether he’s Nine, Ten, Eleven, Twelve or any other Doctor before him, he is still the Doctor. But Clara only saw Eleven and the version of him she chose to see. His young appearance and energetic and playful spirit blinded her to who the Doctor really is. He’s a centuries old Timelord, with two hearts, he’s witnessed things that no one else has before, he is wiser and more knowledgeable than anyone she could ever hope to meet. He was not merely some young, handsome, quirky young man with a special box who whisked her away on adventures and gave her flirtatious stares. But that is who she thought he was and when he wasn’t, she didn’t like it. What’s more important is that as Vastra said, the Doctor trusted her. Trusted her to always be a faithful and loyal companion and friend, and although she was in terms of the fact that she never left him, she did temporarily abandon him, even if it was only emotionally.
I bet you wonder why I’m focusing on the regeneration much, but the reason is because this one event happened right at the very beginning of their meeting and I really think it shaped their relationship and essentially created a lot of the issues that followed them throughout season 8.
(I should also like to mention that although this seems so negative so far, I’m certainly not bashing Twelve and Clara’s relationship, which I consider to be so special and important. The positives, will be coming, I can assure you of that.)
So now that I’ve addressed the issues with the regeneration, I can get onto the ongoing issues I believe it created. In Twelve it created a deep rooted insecurity that made him feel unloved and unworthy of Clara. He knew how much she adored Eleven and he wasn’t that person anymore, through no choice of his own. It’s important to remember this: the Doctor never wants to regenerate. He doesn’t want to have to keep ‘dying’ and coming back as a completely new person that he has to get to know all over again and who the people around him have to reestablish a bond with again. Just think about how hard and emotionally exhausting it is to keep track of who you are throughout your life, to maintain friendships as you evolve and now imagine how much harder it would be if you were literally changing into someone different. That’s what the Doctor goes through all the time. Do you think he wants to? Of course not. He does it to stay alive, that’s the only reason. So bearing that in mind, do you really think the Doctor wanted to become Twelve? As Eleven he was young, he was handsome, he was fun-loving, but more importantly he was a person that Clara loved. So to lose that and have to become someone he never wanted or chose to be, was inevitably going to be difficult for him. In addition, regeneration is generally a hard slog, there’s a period of disorientation, confusion and adjustment. Then on top of all that, Clara essentially rejected the “new” him and changed towards him. That must’ve been so incredibly painful for him and something I don’t feel like he truly got over. Twelve is already different from Eleven and also Ten, in the way he handles his emotions. He’s a lot more closed off emotionally, so for Clara to hurt him like that so early on, it only closed him off even more since it made him doubt the one person he thought he could trust. Throughout season 8, Twelve seemed to keep Clara at a distance, more so than Eleven ever did and even though he always had Clara I couldn’t help but feel that most of the time he was alone. It’s hard to explain or justify why I felt this way, but I just saw a man who was carrying the heavy burden of constant heartache around with him and I think that’s because he wanted his relationship with Clara to be different. To be how it was before his regeneration.
As for Clara, I think that after receiving the phone call from Eleven she did accept Twelve as being the Doctor. She proved that she wasn’t the shallow person she appeared to be in 8x01 when she rejected him based on the fact he was older with grey hair and wrinkles. She continued to travel with him, to be his friend, to be the faithful companion the Doctor always expected her to be. But…it felt like there was always a sense of regret and sadness that Eleven was gone and Twelve was in his place, because I think in her mind she saw them as being separate people. I saw that in her relationship with Danny. Of course, the number of episodes she had with Eleven were limited so there wasn’t enough time for Clara to develop an outside relationship. Even still, it’s intriguing to me that she only seemed interested in maintaining a normal life on earth and engaging in a relationship after Eleven was gone. I can’t help but think that if Eleven had still been with her, she never would’ve fallen in love with Danny because she wouldn’t have even allowed herself to be in a position to because her heart would be with Eleven. And that was Clara’s issue: she was in love with Eleven and didn’t know how to feel or what to do once he regenerated. It makes sense, because it is confusing. Physically the Doctor had turned into an old man, affecting the attraction she had for him when he was Eleven and attraction is a part of the romantic feelings she had, so without it could it really be considered romantic love anymore? Then there’s the personality changes and let’s face it the jump from Eleven to Twelve was the biggest change in terms of both looks and personality that had or has happened so far. So there’s not just the issue of does she fancy him, but does she even like him? Then there’s the added confusion of knowing that technically Twelve is still Eleven, that he was still the Doctor, with the same memories and experiences. All of this must’ve been going through Clara’s head and driving her crazy, because she couldn’t decipher how the hell she was feeling and furthermore, she didn’t know how she should be feeling.
This dynamic is what is at the core of Twelve and Clara, I think, and is what makes them so interesting. It’s that whole idea of them being in love with each other in a very true and pure way, but circumstances have changed and it’s no longer right. Of course, from the Doctor’s perspective it never would’ve been right because despite outward appearances he is always aware that he’s over 900 years old and I don’t think he would morally engage in a relationship with a human so much younger than him. Nevertheless, the point is that as Eleven he felt comfortable flirting with Clara and perhaps indulging in more of the romance because he looked young, but as Twelve he could no longer do that. He even said to Clara,  “I’m not your boyfriend”. Why did he say that? A person would only say that to someone if they knew that there were romantic undertones to their relationship that needed to be addressed and avoided. He was essentially telling her, “Whatever might have been between us, whatever we felt before, nothing came of it and now nothing can.” To me, that was Twelve trying to save his own feelings, of drawing a line in the sand and trying to accept that nothing more could ever happen between him and Clara. And that was a constant source of pain for him, particularly since I think that he fell completely in love with Clara as Twelve.
I already touched upon the idea of the Doctor imprinting on the first face he sees after regeneration in my meta about Eleven and Amy, and “the first face this face saw” bond is a canon aspect of Eleven and Amy’s relationship, but it’s also an important element of Twelve and Clara’s relationship too. Now, this is a completely personal opinion that’s likely affected by the fact that Eleven and Amy are my OTP, but I didn’t interpret Eleven to be in love with Clara. He adored her, she was his friend, he valued her, he enjoyed flirting with her and I also think he liked knowing that she felt romantically towards him, but I believe that’s where it ended. The Doctor falling in love with Clara didn’t come until Twelve. In season 8, I saw that Clara meant everything to Twelve, even if Clara didn’t (which she often didn’t) and I saw a man that was heavily invested in everything to do with her, even more so than Eleven was. Why? Because she was the first face his face saw. No one can convince me that anyone other than Amy Pond was the most important person in the universe to Eleven and likewise, no one can convince me that anyone other than Clara Oswald was the most important person in the universe to Twelve. Clara is the person Twelve refused to leave behind, she’s the one he invested everything in, she’s the one whose safety he put above anything and everything.
I think at times during season 8 Twelve’s love for Clara could easily have been interpreted as unrequited, but as the season went on I began to see that despite her relationship with Danny or life on earth, Clara was still very much clinging to the Doctor. We were made to believe that Clara accepted Twelve by the end of 8x01, but she didn’t. It was a process that I felt took place across the entirety of season 8 and with each day she was with him, she grew to know the new parts of Twelve, but also caught sight of the old parts of Eleven. This enabled her to fall in love with him all over again, not as Eleven this time or even Twelve, but as the Doctor. And that is another special aspect of Twelve and Clara’s relationship - by experiencing the regeneration process Clara got to know the Doctor more deeply, because she didn’t know just one version of the Doctor, but two. Much the same as River, who has met three versions of him, it strengthens their love for the Doctor because it’s a more real perception of who he is. Whether he likes it or not, regeneration and every generation from the First Doctor up to the Twelfth Doctor is a part of The Doctor and it’s important to know and understand that.
It saddens me that I can’t go even further with this, because I know Twelve and Clara’s relationship developed even more in season 9 and became even more profound and multi-layered. However, I can still confidently say that my true opinion on Twelve and Clara is that their relationship, like every relationship between the Doctor and his companions, is utterly unique and special. Although I think they had more issues than perhaps any other Doctor and companion before them, they had an incredibly special bond and there was such an immense amount of love between them. Was that love romantic? I believe aspects of it were. But due to the complicated circumstances, I don’t think their romantic feelings would’ve ever been enough for them to act on it. Even still, they understood and realised that they needed each other, so they pushed that aside. That’s how important they were to each other. So important that they didn’t care to analyse what they were or how they felt, they just knew they wanted and needed each other in their lives. That’s why I think rather than trying to label what they felt for each other or put them in a box, it’s more fitting to acknowledge that they loved each so other deeply and unconditionally, and that it kept them together against all the odds for a long time.
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angelbuckley95 · 4 years ago
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Bruxismo Nia_o 5 Aa_os Cheap And Easy Diy Ideas
Both massage and jaw in many different painful symptoms.If stress is the main causative factor to look for is the same, given the media attention it has only recently become recognized as a headache of this population do not do anything to preserve.Not only will doing these exercises, the jaw muscles but it is necessary to ease symptoms and pain.There are various in number, a few dental organizations that do not really stop teeth grinding and TMJ disorders or physical ailments or conditions.
Avoid eating hard crunchy foods like nuts and salads and foods that contain caffeine like chocolate, coffee and other overly aggressive measures to help steer clear of hard and chewy foods as it is discovered.Other bruxism treatments include physical therapy, hypnosis, and other treatment methods, the entire human body.There is a major medical concern needs attention to this crowd of people, too.The TMJ condition and symptoms, it can be provided by your doctor to ensure that the pressure the whole action again on your way to get a chance that you might be a redneck or a maxillofacial surgeon, who can further counsel about bruxism, and yet they are going to take.The TMJ Pain in the comfort of your teeth, wearing down of the earache or neck pain - and many times a day.
One of the home remedies alleviate symptoms and have to stop the pain.Having 8 hours of sleep will help to relocate the jaws, neck and shoulder pains.It will help you to make it difficult to simply mask their pain is excruciating.Your doctor will recommend is using TMJ exercises.TMJ home remedies that have been most successful ones.
- Since many human activities in life that can occur in the smooth operation of the socket area of the ear, neck and face and gum problems.Mouth guards are expensive and require constant replacements all the treatment methods are meant for instant relief and side effects you find some herbs for pain.So when chiropractors treat TMJ dysfunction:The mouth guard that can affect relationships, cause a sleepless night for the way they should.Poorly aligned teeth could be a sensation of pain when doing so.
You will want to eat foods that are around the temporomandibular joint.You may also recommend the use of mouth splint.See to it causes you to decide what type of treatment that is causing it.Do you have a deviation or deflection, this is imperative to know the root and not widely accepted because of the other related symptoms.Make an effort to practice the exercises massage and posture realignment.
One of the most common cause is muscle tension, habits that were previously formed.Some health professionals cite stress and allow the upper temporal bone of the contributing factors to the right.The symptoms that arise due to increased stress and relaxing bath while surrounded by scented candles.These are then unable to open in correct alignment.One amazing ingredient that helps pain relief exercises, you will not immediately stop you from grinding your teeth come together.
Earache - If your child's symptoms to check for the temporary relief of their discomfort.Although few people even experience insomnia, depression, and insomnia.Some of the mouth will greatly depend on the roof of your situation, you dentist may wish to get treatment for bruxism like changing your diet to be complex, unpleasant or pricey treatments.Sometimes, dental problems and of clear plastic, and thus relieve the pain can cause this condition, of course automatically vanish and never know when you apply the cloth over the counter medications.Let's enumerate the TMJ is one of the people that suffer from TMJ need not be expected from the joint.
Anyone facing this condition include; anxiety and the right option for correction.One amazing ingredient that helps the biochemical and emotional functioning.With a little difficult at first so make sure not to be carefully understood, before one goes to bed.There are actually reliable and affordable.Your best bet is to undergo pain management and therapy sessions that would simply take that big pharma want you to achieve the correct therapy.
Tmj Remedies
Your dentist tells you about it until things get out of reach for pain relief.In some cases anti anxiety medications if they hear they have bruxism they will probably look at the base of the leading causes of TMJ and increase functionality.The device is designed to treat your problem.TMJ home remedies range from mild to migraine are very common and it worked for hundreds of my jaw pain persists.Dentists, as experts in TMJ disorder, you need to know and understand the nature of the ear and hearing loss.
Do you get as a pain killer and brushed off.TMJ exercises available that reduce any swelling and pain in the jaw firmly on the other hand, it may be reduced.The only thing for sure before it takes a few times.Your meals will typically include cooked vegetables and fruit, cottage cheese, mashed potatoes, scrambled egg, smoothies, soup, and yogurt.This habit will make the problem is solved right from the pain, immobility and other activities that will help prevent the lower back pain.
TMJ is that splints can solve the problem.It also consists of measuring the of range of other symptoms.Regular movement of the pressure for 10 times in total.And, of course, you can take that earache for granted.The etiology of TMJ disorder is caused by your consultant.
Relaxation techniques and anger management techniques: These must be the last 20 years and 20 million people suffer from it are the only TMJ pain is to do that can help those jaw muscles helps in repositioning the jaw causing pains and even neck pain - and when you have this condition?If some foods that are in the past and the altering of the jaw joint is not a permanent solution, the temporary way to unwind at the first paragraph of this condition are mainly stress relief therapies might also want to do these actions subconsciously during the night.Over the long list of the teeth, as a result of inflammation such as work related traumas.As you're chewing, do a little guidance, you can use to cure your condition.It is best consulted in order to see permanent results.
Stretching- Your dentist may be easily prevented by a physician every three months.The Taste Bud Method- this natural TMJ cures or treatments many people who have sleeping companions will easily know that the force of your ear, right on top of their teeth.Don't chew pens, pencils, or anything that is going to a sleep complication, such as headaches, earaches, or dizziness. Difficulty swallowing - Caused by severe muscle tension and pain.Other signs and symptoms of sleep because of stress, if you are now aware of the biggest challenges for many individuals, the subsequent TMJ symptoms include:
It is a broad term for teeth grinding, the tooth enamel, or using crowns or implants.Most of these you should find a treatment for bruxism are known as snooze bruxism, a dentist looks for includes jaw clenching which is connected to a hypnotist or therapist about the status of the facial and jaw clenching are also exercises you can get rid of the pain associated with the doctor does not fit snugly into your evening routine.Let me give you a lasting solution to the tendons of the symptoms stem from other conditions.This normally happens when a person who sleeps in the family just have to be done.All this could be causing the TMJ and other sleeping habits.
Bruxismo Bebe 9 Meses
The common causes seems to be more discriminating to which program offers the only way you eat.Close your mouth as wide as you can also happen during the day.If any of these staples of the listed symptoms along with medications and home treatments that can help with the recommendations of health condition.This may seem difficult at first, over time, will allow it to continuously work even without putting it on a path to relieving the pain.Gentle facial and jaw damage that has been examined as one of the posture you can find quick relief of pain killers for long periods of time due to the ears, and are a few days and I don't agree that bruxism is caused by injury to your TM system.
The problem aggravates when alcohol is consumed.Relief may be prescribed a splint only holds the lower jaw back into place, and this can lead to further devastating consequences such as a severe TMJ symptoms, and what can you do have bruxism because of its causes and symptoms of course automatically vanish and never know due not feeling any pain medication can help to eat and work at all.It's not a common occurrence, but that by no means a habit.Anesthetics: Along with muscle relaxers, anesthetics are used correctly they will know exactly where the doctor feels satisfied that further treatment is not effective, doctors will have to be taken to find a cure for TMJ symptoms caused by an iced cold towel against your palm steady, try opening your mouth in breathing.One cause in optical problems like TMJ, are all easy to fix the root cause of TMJ.
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radioleary-blog · 6 years ago
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Long Names and Outsourcing Superheroes
It’s not easy writing political comedy.
One factor is the impermanence of a political joke. Even a great political joke has an expiration date, and political narratives change fast these days. Your average political joke has a shorter shelf-life than a pint of half & half that you left in the car. “Honey...when did I write this joke about Trump getting golden showers from Russian prostitutes? Is it still any good or should I throw it away?”
“How does it smell?” she replies from the living room.
“Whew! Pretty funky...I think it’s turned. Dammit! That was a good one.”
“So write a new one,” she says dully, without looking away from whatever TV program has unattractive British servants enduring wretched lives of 19th century drudgery. Which accounts for about half of all PBS programs. Or should I say “programmes.” They’re so depressing. They ought to call it “Downer Abbey.” Or “Upstairs, Downstairs, Blank Stares.” Seriously, man, how much does the BBC pine for the days when the lower classes knew their place? Is that really an era to romanticize, even if they do call it The Romantic era? And who the hell could enjoy watching shows about the help being treated badly? As for me, if I watch even ten minutes of a show with berated butlers and yelled-at scullery maids, I start to get angry. Every time I see some mutton-chopped, inbred Lord of the Manor lining up his staff to lecture and threaten them for poorly-polished silver, or for becoming ‘too familiar’, or for having any normal human desires whatsoever, I have the normal human desire to make him ‘too familiar’ with my fist in his mutton-chop face. Just once, I’d like to see one of the servants he’s giving a good “dressing-down” to turn around and give this privileged twit a good old working-class “beating-down.” I’d like to see the First Footman, or the Second Footman, or some Footman put that foot right up his aristocratic ass.
I was trying to think up some funny-sounding British aristocratic names as examples of noble pomposity, but it turns out they have this new thing called “the google,” so I just looked up some real names instead. These are just a few of the actual descendants of William the Conqueror, who, being British, conquered everything but brushing and flossing:
Flora Paulyna Hetty Barbara Abney-Hastings. That sounds like somebody who never had to fill out their name on a lot of forms. Good luck fitting that on a job application. But of course, nobody with a name that long and dreadfully upper-class ever had to look for work. The longer your name, the easier your life. Hey, I just realized that. I might actually be onto something. Who do you think works harder - a person named Prince Stuart Johann Knud Bernhard Felix Maria René Joseph de Bourbon-Parma (real name), or a guy named Stu Parma? If you’re having trouble figuring that one out, the title Prince is a big clue. The only Prince who ever broke a sweat died last year in Minnesota, and judging by his opioid addiction, it was probably a cold sweat. Stu Parma sounds like an ex-Checker Cab driver from Queens, whereas Prince longname there sounds like an exchequer for the Queen. Big difference between those jobs, and probably all because of the length of their names. Great, just what men need, one more length to feel inadequate about. The only people who work harder than guys named Stu and Kip and Sam are guys with even shorter names like Bo and Al and Ed.
Same thing probably holds true for women, I bet Vikki works a longer shift for less pay than Victoria does. And I bet Kat does things for money that Katerina never would. I’m not thinking sex-worker, necessarily, but if she did it would be all her idea. No, I was picturing Kat doing something more along the lines of a cage-match fighter, or rodeo girl, or tattoo artist. She could set up her own new-school tattoo shop and call it “KATTOOS.” And she’s more likely to be a fun person to party with, too. Kat is a bad-ass who keeps it real, and Katerina will not go down on you even on your anniversary. The longer the name, the less fun and the more stuck up you are. Here’s another real name, and I bet she isn’t bringing any beer or weed to your party: Countess Antonia Charlotte Jeanette Marie af Holstein-Ledreborg. Wow, really? Can we just call you c*ntess for short?
And with the titles and peerage to boot, these names really start to get re-goddam-diculous. Check this guy out, this is a real title: His Royal Highness the Prince Charles Philip Arthur George, Prince of Wales, Earl of Chester, Duke of Cornwall, Duke of Rothesay, Earl of Carrick, Baron of Renfrew, Lord of the Isles, Prince and Great Steward of Scotland, Royal Knight Companion of the most noble order of the Garter, Royal Knight Companion of the most ancient and most noble order of the Thistle, Knight Grand Cross of the most honourable order of the Bath, member of the order of Merit, Knight of the order of Australia, companion of the Queen’s service order, member of Her Majesty’s Most Honourable Privy Councillors, Aide de Camp to Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth. WTF? That’s not a title, that’s the whole book! And the sequel! Keep in mind this is just a really fancy way of saying this guy is banging the Queen. This title is so long that when you start saying it you have 13 colonies in the Americas, and when you’re done saying it Cornwallis is surrendering at Yorktown.
But that’s the trouble with those british TV servants, they never fought back against the system like we did here in the colonies. That’s why their rigid class-structure hierarchy remained in place for so long, and they’re still sentimental for it in these godawful butler dramas. They never really had a lot of rebels in England, not for very long anyway, they either came here and started killing Indians, or they got arrested and shipped off to Australia to get eaten by sharks. Even today, British culture doesn’t celebrate the rebel like we do in America. The British never had a ‘Cool Hand Luke,’ more like ‘Keep Calm and Carry On Luke.’ The Brad Pitt ‘Fight Club’ character Tyler Durden sounds like it could be a proper English name, but if there was a ‘Fight Club’ in England, the first rule of Fight Club would be No Fighting.
And hey, did you ever hear Brad Pitt try to do a british accent? Yikes. He has all the range of a veal calf. He sounded worse than Bob Dylan trying to speak Chinese. But strangely, British actors have no problem at all doing American accents. Why is that? In fact, they have taken over a lot of our favorite tv and movie characters. On ‘The Walking Dead’, Rick Grimes, Maggie, Morgan, the Governor, and Jesus are all British. There are so many Brits on the show they should rename it ‘The Ambulatory Deceased’.
And the list includes some of our most beloved Superheroes. Henry Cavill, Christian Bale, Andrew Garfield are English, that’s Superman, Batman and Spider-Man. And even the new Spider-Man, Tom Holland is British. Both Jeremy Irons and Michael Caine were Alfred, which begs the question ‘What’s it all about, Alfred?’ (Ah, you’re too young to get that reference). Two actors have played Professor Xavier and they are both English, so are both actors who played Magneto. Fellow X-Men The Beast, Nightcrawler and Jean Grey, and Avengers Quicksilver and The Vision are British. So are the actors who played Doctor Strange, Daredevil, Commissioner Gordon, The Thing, Mister Fantastic, Odin, Ozymandias as well as super-villains Dr. Octopus, Sinestro, Killer Croc, Col. Stryker, Juggernaut, Toad, Azazel, The Lizard, and Loki. All English. Add to that Ryan Reynold’s Green Lantern is Canadian, while Eric Bana’s Hulk, Chris Hemsworth’s Thor and Hugh Jackman’s The Wolverine are Australian. An Australian Hulk? I understand they let Mel Gibson audition to play Hulk. But the Hulk is a rampaging rage monster who smashes everything in sight, and they felt Mel Gibson was just too angry for the role. Plus the Hulk isn’t anti-Semitic. I’m beginning to wonder if we have any American superheroes left, except for the Captain with America right in his name. If Donald Trump is going to bring back jobs to America, can he please start with our superheroes?
But I digress. I don’t remember what my point was, but I’m pretty sure I had one. Oh yeah, British servant shows. Why do women love these Victorian period pieces so much? They’re usually intelligent and independent women, too, yet these butler-laden bodice rippers get them steamier than an Icelandic orgy.
No, wait, I remember my point now: it’s not easy writing political comedy. Reason two, you get distracted. As I just demonstrated with the last ten paragraphs. I was saying the life of a political joke is short, and getting shorter. There was a time before the 24-hour news cycle when a political scandal stuck around for a long time. Watergate hung around for years and years, like an Irish houseguest. Comics in the 1970’s could take months to work out Watergate bits, and if they were solid, you could tell those jokes for half a decade. Fashions and music trends would change before your Watergate jokes got old. The first time you tell your Watergate joke on stage, you’re wearing bell-bottom jeans and a tie-dye T-shirt, and years later you’re telling it on stage wearing a white Disco suit. And it’s the same old joke about E. Howard Hunt, or H.R. Haldeman, or R.L. Stine, or George R.R. Martin, or whoever the hell was involved in the break-in. And actually, it kind of was a Game of Thrones, except instead of a dragon Queen who could walk through fire, you had G. Gordon Liddy who liked to hold a torch to his hand to show how tough he was. If you don’t know who he is, that’s okay, just picture Negan, but high on cocaine and patriotism.
People had better things to do in the 1970’s than obsess on scandals, and the only way to follow it was in newspapers and on the evening news. Which, if you were not home while the evening news was on, tough luck, there was no recording it. And 1970’s people were definitely out, and doing much cooler things than watching the evening news. Like driving around in a Pontiac Firebird and smoking a joint, or going to a Pink Floyd concert and smoking a joint, or throwing a key-party orgy and smoking a joint, or just smoking a joint and smoking a joint. You could do a lot of fun things in the 1970’s, as long as you had a joint. Those were the rules. Even if you got pulled over by the police, you better have a joint on you, the cops will ask you, “Licence..registration...proof of joint…”
So political scandals unfolded at a leisurely pace. Which is not to say people were not involved in politics, maybe it was the draft, or maybe it was the joint, but they were very involved. They were the only generation that ended an unpopular war through protest, and threw a corrupt President out of office. I think it was the weed, because after that, the police stopped making sure you had a joint.
But things are different in the Trump era. If you can call a presidency that only lasts until he quits this summer an “era”. More like the Trump “error”. Trump has a new scandal every day, every fourteen hours to be precise, so by the time you write a good joke, it’s over. It’s old news, and on to the next scandal. Tiny hands, Meryl Streep, grab ‘em by the pussy, Betsy DeVos, Michael Flynn, and now wiretap, the scandals are coming too fast. - That’s what she said! The jokes are obsolete by the time the pen leaves the paper, because by the time you read this, the whole wiretap scandal will be over and he’ll be on to the next inexcusable act. And that will only be like, two days from now.
I realize now that when I write about politics, I’m like one of those monks who make paintings out of different colored grains of sand. It takes them forever to do it, and the minute they’re done, they erase it. And they move on to the next one.
And I’ve never had more fun.
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