#like i'm sorry but i'll be honest it's a toxic relationship in this fic

[shipsgaysfordays]

What? (Mary and Sirius POV)

Links to the other chapters here

I’m updating this fic again, I know it’s a shocker. I’m really hoping to get this done over the summer. Also, if you haven’t read any of this fic, I’ll be honest that I think it is totally possible to just jump in in this chapter. Like some shit might not make as much sense, but I’m happy if anyone gets into the fic at any point please.

“There’s a lovin’ in your eyes, all the way. If I listen to your lies would you say, I’m a man, without conviction? I’m a man who doesn’t know how to make a decision. You come and go, you come and go-o-o-o.” 

Mary’s portable radio emits Boy George’s voice, as Harry and her listen along. A stuffed bear in the boys hands, crochet together, sewn up in spots, thin with years of love causing stuffing to spew out.

As the chorus begins and the “karma, karma, karma, karma, karma chameleon” is repeated over and over on the radio, Harry’s leg shakes with excitement and he flops the bear (Mr. Beary) ‘s arms around. 

 Sitting on the couch, Mary hears the sound of a car engine running, driving closer and closer. She grins from ear to ear at Harry, both gitty that his parents would be home in just a few moments. 

The door bangs into the wall with momentum, as Lily bolts inside, running into the living room, and wraps her son in her arms. Kissing him all over, Harry giggles. 

“See, I told you she would be home soon,” Mary smiled.

James walked in to find this scene, his wife and son together, and Mary just kind of there. 

“Well, I was going to ask if I could have my son, but he seems a bit preoccupied. How did things go with babysitting, Mary?” He turned to face her. 

“No fires, accidents, or pranks–so better than babysitting a drunk 16-year-old you,” she remarked. 

“Give him time, greatness wasn’t made in a day.”

“It’s Rome wasn't built in a day,” Lily corrects, brushing her hand in Harry’s hair,“and you better not be insulting this sweet boy, trying to make him a troublemaker like you.”

“Nothing of the sort, just leaving options open,” James grins. 

“Sure James, sure,” Mary winked. 

“I don’t believe McGonagall would appreciate ANOTHER POTTER terrorizing the school with mischief.”

“And I don’t believe Harry should have his head glued to a textbook for his whole schooling experience.”

James picked up a magazine, flipped to a random page and placed it down on his son's head. Harry held onto his new hat, making sure to keep it on as his mother incessantly began swatting it off.

“I’m not saying that–” Lily interjected.

“But it’s his decision.”

“What would you like to do Harry?” Mary cut in, “when you finally go to Hogwarts?”

The kid thought for a moment, his hand on his chin in an adorable yet deep in thought expression, he glanced at his mother and father, “Don’t know…”

“Nothing comes to mind?”

“It’s a secret.”

“A secret?” the three adults spoke in unison.

“Can we know the secret?” James asked as Lily let Harry down, him having gotten a bit too big to be held for super long. 

“You’ll find out later.”

Things went silent for a moment, until the little boy said, “Miss Mary can know.”

The husband and wife made an amused smirk as Harry waddled over and whispered in Mary’s ear, “Magic.”

Mary couldn’t help laughing, “Yeah, I think you’ll get plenty of opportunities to do that there.”

Harry leaned back over, “and quidditch!” He spoke just a bit too loud for the poor woman’s ear drums and for the secret status of the words.

Mary got up and tapped James on the shoulder, “He’s your son alright.”

“I’ve never felt the need to question the paternity of my child, but thank you for letting us know,” Lily quipped. 

“So,” Lily taps the seat on the couch next to her, staring into Mary’s soul while in mom mode, “how did things go while we were away?”

“They went fine, again, he’s eaten and slept, he’s alive and you’re happy, right Harry?”

Harry laid on the floor, playing dead. 

“Oh Merlin, we’ve lost him, noooooooo,” James played, shaking his son, “how could you do this Mary?”

“What did he eat?”  Lily rolled her eyes at the antics.

“Cheese on toast for dinner, some yogurt and fruit for breakfast, and we haven’t eaten lunch just yet but he’s stolen quite a few of my biscuits as a snack so he may not want lunch too soon.”

“How much sleep did he get?”

“We went to bed around…8,” Mary lied.

“Lily, stop trying to interrogate her,” James interjected as he shook Harry’s arms about, still trying to get him up and alive.

“I’m not–”

“You are, lying doesn’t look good on you dear, either of you,” he winks at Mary.

Harry giggles as James begins tickling his stomach. 

“HE’S ALIVE!” Mary gasps. 

“I think I may need to get some tools and experiment on this great discovery of necromancy, if you need me or patient zero, we’ll be up in his room,” James holds Harry’s hand and leads him out the room, turning to Lily and winking before heading up the stairs.

“What was the wink about? Are you guys gonna get into some…interesting stuff of your own later?” Mary smirks.

Lily’s face is redder than her hair. “What? Heh, no, ummm, actually….oh, how do I say this?”

“Probably verbally, you could try sign though, I’m still pretty new to learning it though so I may not get it.”

“You’re learning sign language?”

“Here and there, but that’s beside the point.” Mary leans in holding Lily’s warm cheeks with her hands, “What’s your secret? Would it be better to whisper in my ear like the kid did?”

Lily smiles, “James and I aren’t in a romantic relationship anymore.”

Mary’s eyes go as wide as the world, scratch that, the galaxy. 

“And that’s…okay, that’s good? You’re smiling about it, so…”

“Yes, it’s good, Mary.”

“So, you’re just fucking no strings attached…with a kid?”

“What? No,” Lily laughed, “I don’t–we just don’t feel that way about each other, we’re mates, and despite a long time of both of us denying it, we’re not really into each other.”

“Then why?” Mary asked, sounding as though a rock shattered her glass heart. 

“It made his parents happy, it made my parents happy, everyone expected it. It was some fated love, something that was bound to happen, but when it came down to it there wasn’t much there. James is amazing, he’s the best father any kid could have, but I never really wanted a husband and he never truly wanted a wife.”

“So, no more marriage for Madame Lily?” Mary plastered a smile onto her face.

“Maybe someday, if Harry’s fine with it and it’s not too awkward for all of us. Not to a man though, I’m…a lesbian.” 

“Oh…..did you find some gal here?”

“Sort of, she’s a lot more nearby than you would expect,” Lily leaned in. 

She’s not, she cannot be saying, no.

“Oh,” the sound came out of Mary’s mouth without her even thinking of it, not even knowing as the neurotransmitters had sent signals from her brain right through the larynx and the sound landed out of her lips. 

“I missed you, more than anything else in the world, I missed you,” Lily’s eyes were like moss, beautiful clumps of colors, begging to be seen, to be known, to be loved once more by this viewer of the earth. 

“I missed you too, but–” Mary started.

Rudely she was interrupted by the sound of a loud thud and crackle of wall by the garage entrance followed by a quite loud “DAMN IT.”

(Changing to Sirius’ POV for a bit because it’s necessary for the story)

At  the scene of the destruction as James is transfiguring the wall to be fixed with Sirius next to him, a little bit of blood on zer knuckles. 

“I know that they are hurting and I need to give him time, but I am hurting too. And I love Moony, but…I am hurting too and I want to help him but I’m not even whole. How can I give myself when all that’s left are broken pieces and parts and screams and breaking walls and–” Sirius’ hands moved wildly as ze spoke, all culminating in zer sitting in the fetal position. 

“Sirius,” James interrupted, “you’re fine to give yourself time, we could play some quidditch or do something else that you love, your world doesn’t have to revolve around Moony.”

Sirius stared off.

“I don’t know how to be with them anymore, still I don’t know how to live without them. They’re everything to me, and just yesterday they were trying to kill me.”

“Give yourself space.”

“But he needs–”

“He needs to figure themself out, just the same as you, you need to figure out whether it’s more beneficial to figure yourselves out together or apart.”

“I’ve been away from them for years, I don’t want to waste whatever time…” Sirius started to tear up.

“It’s not wasting time to get out, Sirius, but the decision is up to you.” James held zer hand up and examined it, “episkey,” he mutters softly. 

There’s a moment of silence as the two men look at each other, the years wearing on both of them though more visibly obvious in Sirius, as though ze had been in Azkaban for 12 years rather than simply 3. Bandages still on zer neck. Hair long and knotted. Eyes having lost so much of the light and joy that James loved to see in his friend. 

Their silence was interrupted by an only slightly muffled “FUCK” coming from outside. 

Sirius had been staring off, in a bit of a trance. 

“I’m going to go…check on them, can I? Will you be fine?” James touched zeir shoulder to get zer attention. 

Ze nodded, “Just fine Prongs, just fine.”

(Mary POV once more)

When the women arrived at the sight of Sirius sitting on the ground and staring into space, Lily slowly slipped away as Mary turned to her and made a face. James looked at Mary and waved her off, mouthing “I’ve got this.” And despite Mary’s constant desire to interject, she too backed out of the situation knowing that her presence may make things too much for Sirius. 

“I’m gonna make some tea, and maybe some sweets to go along with it. That would convince Remus, they always loved sweets, right?” Lily looked to Mary for assurance after they were out of earshot from James and Sirius. 

“Yeah…” Mary stared back, are we gonna talk about, her mind wandered. 

Flour, cocoa powder, sugar, baking soda, salt, everything that could get on the counters and their clothes somehow did get on the counters and their clothes. Finger sandwiches being made and cut. Store bought croissants being placed on a pan to be warmed up to hopefully fool Sirius into believing they homemade them. Gooey brownies leaving a sweet scent through the room. 

As things were coming out of the oven and cooling off, Lily placed a pot of water to boil and stood next to Mary, both women stacking goodies onto plates. 

“I really did miss you,” Lily said, looking down. 

Unsure of what to say, Mary let the silence afterwards continue. 

“Through all of it, honestly…”

“I missed you too,” Mary finally responded, “but–”

Lily closed the little distance that was between them, her warm breath tingling on Mary’s skin, “but?” she taunted. 

“I–I don’t know if this is right,” Mary’s face was as hot as a furnace, “I don’t know if I can trust you anymore or love you that way anymore after everything.”

“Just be with me now, please, you’re everything to me,” Lily held Mary up against the fridge, and snogged her.

What about James? What about Harry? You have a family that I am not a part of. But Mary doesn’t say the quiet part out loud because she honestly did miss this.

[duskandcobalt]

Hiii, Santa here! Sorry for disappearing, it's been quite a few busy days, but I'm back with my questions hehe

Btw the anon ask about Elain wasn't me, but thank you for using the acotargiftexchange tag anyway because the more I know, the better! 🤍

Since you've mentioned it in that post, my first question is, Earth magic witchy Elain? Could you elaborate? I'm not sure I've ever heard that one before and now I'm curious 👀

Here's what I already wanted to ask:

1. Since last time I asked this about Elain, now I gotta ask about Azriel to make it fair. What's your favorite thing about him and is there anything you don't like?

2. How are we feeling about Christmas vibes in the fic? Or would you prefer a more everyday kind of vibe? And since we're on the topic of vibes, I was thinking of going with a fluffy fic because, well you know, it's Christmas. But if you'd rather read something else, please let me know 🙏🏻 I'm here to please

3. Is there anything you think you have in common with either Azriel or Elain? Passions, hobbies, personality traits… anything

4. How did you get into the ACOTAR books and fandom?

This time they're all acotar related, I'm sorry 😭 I have so much I'd like to ask but I don't want to flood you with questions, so I'll stop here since there are already so many (but I'll be back soon 😈)

Hope you have a lovely weekend!

-🎅🎅🎅

Hi Santa!! I’m so sorry it’s taken me five years to reply to this but I’m here now 😊

Okay re: earthy/witchy Elain… I am obsessed with the idea of Elain have some sort of witchy powers and working with herbs etc and I think she may also have some sort of power of life if that makes sense? I’m honestly horrible at explaining things but if you want to know what I’m on about, @wingedblooms has incredible theories that they’ve put heaps of time into explaining beautifully!

Onto your questions…

1. My toxic trait is that I loooove a quiet, mysterious man that doesn’t say much and is lowkey terrifying and Azriel ticks all those boxes. They’re like a little puzzle to solve and I love a challenge that has major potential to hurt me …. But!! I love that he really sees and understands people and you can tell that he genuinely cares for the people around him and even though he doesn’t talk much, he’s always listening and learning. One of my favourite things in the world is Azriel’s relationship with Nesta - the way I cried when he gave her the book light for solstice and she hugged him should be studied 😭😭😭 it’s one of my favourite parts of the whole series.

There’s not much I don’t like about him, to be honest - at least nothing that I can think of off the top of my head! I guess regifting the necklace wasn’t his brightest moment but in the words of Lana Del Rey, 🎵you’re just a man… it’s just what you do 🎵

2. I LOVE a fluffy, Christmas vibe!! Azriel canonically loves a holiday, who am I to deny him of a fluffy moment 🎄

3. I have so much in common with them, I think that’s why they’re my faves bc I feel like I know them personally 😭 I looove baking and cooking and I love to do things for people. I love a grandma craft. I don’t think we know much about Azriel in way of hobbies but I’ve decided he loves music and so do I. I am also a big time quiet friend (in real life, idk why I can’t shut up online), listener not talker, and so will dole out advice when necessary a la the spymaster so we’ve got that in common

4. I don’t even know!!! I’m so late to the game, I was a big lit fic girlie (still am) but my friend was reading the first one and I’d seen it all over TikTok and I am SO easily influenced… I picked it up July 8th last year and I’d finished all of ACOTAR and ToG by August 15th 😅 it’s a high I’ve been chasing ever since and it reignited my long lost love for reading so I’ll forever be thankful to it… plus it led me back to writing and this amazing community

I’m sorry I’ve yapped again!! Hope you enjoyed this novel lol

ILY!!!

[theglizzardwizard]

asking cc mfs if they have any interesting stories to tell with the characters they like and they either pull out the most obvious fetish content you've ever seen, yet still rated G for some fuckng reason, or the blandest milquetoast m/m cog fic with 100k+ words that manages to be either racist or infuriatingly centrist, with next to 0 relationship drama (all the conflict comes from the toons because having two characters argue is problematic and makes the ship toxic btw). anyways i cant wait for council plates because at least it'll have actual stuff in it. it will be most good to read something where things actually happen

Read council plates for the plot progression and also the character study of the worst person you've ever met on toontown. I'm sorry about the absolute state of the fic tag, though.

(I'll be honest and say that the kink stuff would bother me half as much if it was just. Properly rated. Stop writing blatant fetish fics and then tagging them as 'non-sexual'. If you're gonna be a weirdo at least cop to your own behavior?)

(The ship fics are usually pretty bad tho ngl. I have read exactly two just to see if I was making mean assumptions but, no, the fics are usually poorly written on top of being boring)

[wonhosmistress]

Aphrodisia;Prologue

(NSFW)

Word Count: 1,196

Warnings: Slight mention of Kinks, sexual BDSM themes, sex work, and lastly, TW! toxic-ish relationship mentions. Think I missed some? Lmk and send me a dm, I'll update this.

A/N:I have no IDEA how long this took for me finish because I’ve been teasing this series for a couple months with the only two teasers I mentioned of Hyunjin. Seems I have a lot of sub!Hyunjin enthusiasts because same y’all. 😩I promise to finish the Hyunjin before June ends and after that I’ll focus more on other members.

Anyways! This is the prologue enjoy this unfiltered, unedited, there will be hella grammar mistakes and I don’t plan to edit it because it’s too much work and I honestly just want to post ASAP. It’s been far too long since I’ve written and had any sort of inspo to write. Thanks to my dear mutual @nirvanawrites111 she gave me hella inspo with her amazing works!! I’m obsessed with her writing please go do me a favor and read her amazing stories/fics.

Also I tried to add the read more on mobile but I’m a dumbass and idk how to work tumble mobile sometimes lmao. So I apologize for anyone that will see this and doesn’t want to see it.

As a result of unsuccessful relationships and partners being concerned about where she went or what she was doing, she became more secretive about her whereabouts. Even though she wanted to be honest and open with them, she hesitated on many occasions; if she were to be bold and unapologetic they would go insane and ask questions like, "Why did you choose this job out of all the others?", "Are you cheating on me?", etc.

Those tiresome scenarios were one of the reasons she was always the one that broke it off with them, and so she took it upon herself to take a break from her dating life to focus on herself.

She had a job that wasn't just any regular job.

OnlyFans? No

Camgirl? No.

A phone Sex worker? No.

Feet pics? No.

Used panties? No

For her working at night was ideal because her sleeping schedule only allowed her to be a night owl. Even before any partner appeared in her life she was still in the process of discovering a whole new part of herself that she wasn't aware existed, and here she was in a dungeon that she had been hired at over a year ago and was one of the few popular dommes among the clients.

"How are you feeling?", She stood next to the man sitting on the loveseat.

"I'm good, Mistress." He smiled at her.

"Would you like some water?" He nodded in response.

She walked towards the room next door and back to the playroom to hand him the bottle.

She crouched down to his level to face him as well to check in with him, "How are you feeling? Was it too much?", she asked curiously as to how she could improve. What she should've done is saved that question for the head domme but she didn't and took the risk.

"No. Not at all. It was perfect, I enjoyed every second of it."

He faced her smiling at him and held her hand realizing he shouldn't be doing that.

"I'm sorry...may I?" She smiled warmly at him not pulling her hands away from his grasp.

"I just wanted to say thank you."

While she had not broken skin or drawn blood, she still left a few red welts on him. She grabbed the first aid kit in the corner and treated his wounds, trying to be as gentle as possible.

"No need to thank me. You went out of your way to give it a shot when you could've easily backed out and I would've still respected your decision. BDSM isn't everyone's cup of tea and so we've learned to respect everyone's decision."

She applied a first-aid ointment to every single red mark on his back; he hissed at the lightest touch, "I'm sorry, I know it hurts I'm just trying to make sure these heal quickly and nicely."

"I know and I appreciate it."

"Done." She stood up and handed him his T-shirt. "Make sure to take a warm bath or shower after you get home and keep applying ointment on the marks afterward.

He smiled at her making his way toward the exit.

"Will do.",

She smiled at him and nodded, seeing him off.

That was one of the roughest BDSM scenes she had done in a while. She would like to take time to make sure her submissive didn't go into a sub-drop, but sadly she couldn't. If it were her, she would go out of her way to remain with every submissive for a bit longer. However, her boss had to remind her that they only came here for a service nothing more. Because of this, she couldn’t be there for more than ten to fifteen minutes with her clients after their sessions ended.

~~~~~

"See you tomorrow night!" Her boss told her as they both headed in different directions.

She silently walked for the next couple of four blocks by herself and finally got closer to her apartment. She walked up the stairs and opened the door to her place. The second she got in she took off her shoes left them at the entrance and hung her purse on the rack.

Exhausted and couldn't even begin to explain how she felt after handling four subs back to back today. It was not an ideal situation for her couldn't handle more than two subs a day because her anxiety and insecurities kept creeping back up on her.

She meditated, journaled, exercised, and even set days apart for self-care plus, she detoxed from her constant electronic use. She ate healthily and did her best to keep her homey environment clean and organized. However, regardless of what she did something inside her told her she couldn't keep doing this.

She craved something new and stable.

She loved domming but maybe because of all her ex-partner's insecurities of themselves as she hid her true identity was reflecting on herself.

Could it be that deep inside she was ashamed of her job and what she did?

Years ago when she discovered the person she truly was glowed with confidence. How could she even be a dominatrix if she wasn't sure of herself and her current job?

Oh no.

She was experiencing not only her anxieties but also a dom drop.

Telling her boss; she was fine could've been a mistake because she was responsible for taking care of her dommes since half of them didn't have a partner to take care of them.

Fuck.

~~~~~

Two years Later:

Two years and a half of learning Korean were a big help during the entire process of her moving across the world. She wasn't fluent yet but could manage conversations with her neighbors, classmates, and strangers. And so here she was, sitting inside a cafe shop a couple of blocks from the Korean class she had just finished attending.

It seemed like only yesterday, she was experiencing the worst anxiety and burnout from only a year of working as a domme which was odd considering that she had never once felt like that before. But it made sense since she kept getting the gnawing feeling that she shouldn't have gotten into the dominatrix world way too early and so she took it upon herself to resign to take time for herself; and continue her future as domme by researching more information about the career, lifestyle, and possibly a new business.

The grueling work of research, language learning, space vacancy, furniture shop, etc made her take a step back and reconsider if she could do this all by herself. Thankfully, after taking a couple of weeks to continue her research she found herself posting on an exclusive adult site looking for dommes to work with her.

After returning calls and doing interviews she had successfully found four dommes who wanted to continue their careers in the kink community and so never once she thought, that she out of all people would be involved with any of Korea's music industry. Especially the ever so sexually frustrated men of Kpop that had an image and reputation to uphold in the industry, their companies, and not to forget their fans.

[badsmellyboy]

Pairings: Fred Weasley x fem!oc

Warnings: none(?)

Masterlist

Summary: this is a chapter from one of my in the works fred fics,, I really love it and I wanted to share !!

AN: ok my ocs name is Paulina Gaunt, nickname Polly,, she was previously in a toxic relationship with (another oc) Darius Malfoy, aka Draco's older brother :-)

☆

"I just want to make you happy. I'm sorry," I said softly with sincerity, my eyes on the sleeve of his shirt. I was scared to look up. I knew he could see right through me and it hurt. I couldn't bear to look up to his eyes.

"You never have to try. You always do, just be."

This is when I look up to him, my eyes glossy. I tried my hardest to choke back the sob I was holding in. Whatever wall that i had up with Darius, making me brave and unbothered- Fred broke it every time.

At the look of my pink face he cupped my cheek, smoothing my imperfect skin almost anticipating tears to fall. And they did. I didnt make a sound in fear of ruining something- as if everything wasnt already messed up. Him caring so much for someone like me.

"I dont understand." I dont think I'll ever understand. He was a miracle from above.

He leaned closer.

"Are you gonna make me say it?" Fred humoured. I smiled warmly at him, just everything him.

"Fred."

And at that, me saying his name simply, he kissed me and I kissed him back as to tell him 'Say it, Fred. Say it so I dont have to. Say it so I know I'm not mad. Say it to heal my heart. I love you.'

When he pulled away I felt incomplete. I could tell by the look in his eyes that he felt that too.

"I really like you, Polly."

Love, Fred, I love you.

"I do too. Like you."

You're a bad liar, Paulina.

"Do you?" I smack him on the shoulder with a playful smile. Yes. His hands still rest on me.

"You sure you can handle my chaos?" Yes, Fred. I'll take it all with open arms.

"I've put up with it fine all the years I've known you," I smirked and he returned the favour.

"I guess you have."

There was a silence, a pleasant feeling that lingered. Just the two of us under the moonlight, the stakes high of midnight wanderers happening upon us. We didnt care, our faces still spread with amazed smile at eachother.

"What does this mean?" He broke the quiet with the everlong question that had plagued my mind whenever I thought of him. He never knew how much i thought that question. He wouldve teased me endlessly if I told him.

"Whatever you want it to mean- whatever it does mean to you, I'm yours either way," I said so quietly as the words escaped my lips, fearing it was too desperate. I wanted to scream it from the hills and let my confessions echo off the treeline. It was something Darius wouldve liked to hear.

It felt like a wrong thing to say to Fred but by the look in his eyes he felt it endearing. And good of that, because I really did mean it.

"Ive wanted to tell you this for too long now, since before I knew you like I do now," He gazed off. "And now I know you and- well, you're a thing of Merlin."

I was star struck, in that moment. He was being so honest about his caring for me. He broke down another wall of me that was embarrassed of my own caring. I let it fall.

"You always know what to say, Weasley. It's what breaks my heart the most," I took a breath. He was looking at me expectantly, waiting for me to go on.

"You're too good for me. It scares me. I've watched you with admiration before I knew it was desire. You're brilliant, you are, but you confess this to me without caring that if return the favour it will change everything. I'll change you, I'll exhaust you with my past, you'll have to fight for me unless you dont think it's worth it. I dont blame you if it's not."

Fred's expression doesnt change, as if was expecting what he heard.

"Polly. I dont think you understood what I meant when I told you I liked you."

"Well you didnt elaborate on much," I try to humour and he returns in a smile, a smile that will always calm my nerves. I notice his hands went from my face when we kissed, to my hands and now slipped to my waist.

"I know you, Polly. I know your good and I know your bad. I know that whatever you think ruined you could never lead me away from you. I want you in the most honest way a man like me could be. That's what I meant when I said I like you."

He said everything I ever needed to hear. So I kissed him harder than I have ever kissed anyone. And with my lips I told him my love- he kissed back with the same passion.

☆

[alinesart3]

Skyfall: Part 1

This fanfiction is written by me and @mostsanenikolaikinnie on pinterest

Pairings: fyodor x nikolai (toxic), sigma x nikolai

Warning: language, su1c1de attempt, god complex

A/N: Fyodor is the doa leader (no fukuchi in this fic) Also sometimes fyodor and the others might seem a bit out of character.. sorry for that

This is my first fic.. btw english is not my first language

Word count: 1 888

"But Fyodor, darling.. I just wanted to show you my new magic trick!" Nikolai and Fyodor were in the main office of the Decay of Angels organization, which was located in the Sky Casino thousand feet above the city of Yokohama. Nikolai had barged into the leader's room, excitedly waving with his arms and ecstatic to show Fyodor his latest trick. "Who allowed you to enter my office?!" Fyodor switfly turned around and stared at Nikolai with a piercing look in his eyes. "No one" Nikolai giggled "but that's okay, though, since you're my sweet husband whom I love so much!" Nikolai ran up to Fyodor and smiled broadly. "STOP TALKING! The only reason I'm still able to bare your constant annoyance is for that book we need. Once that's over with, I'll drop you off on the side of the road and leave you to finally perish." Fyodor leaned closer to Nikolai and spoke slowly to make sure his every word came across loud and clear "Now leave. I do not want to waste any more of my precious time with a creature like you. Someone like you doesn't deserve to even breathe the same air as me, let alone live!" His words and tone in voice became more aggressive every word he said. Nikolai turned his head slightly to the side and placed his hand on Fyodor's "but honey.." Fyodor ripped his hand back and wiped it on his cloak "You call me "honey" one more time and you will never see the light of day again!" Sigma, who was standing in a corner, eating cookies, observed the two self-proclaimed "lovers" (with self-proclaimed I obviously only mean Nikolai) yell back and forth. "Damn, these two DESPERATELY need relationship counselling.. I better leave before I'm Fyodor's next target.." he thought while slowly and quietly backing out of the room.

A few minutes of back-and-forth yelling later, Nikolai left Fyodor's office and closed the door. "Hey Nikolai, are you okay?" Sigma watched as Nikolai disappointedly exited the room. Nikolai looked up at him sadly and sighed "I.. I just wanted to show him my magic trick!" He felt his eyes fill with tears "WHAT DID I DO WRONG?! HOW DID I MANAGE TO MESS IT ALL UP SO BADLY!?" Sigma awkwardly looked off to the side, he was getting tired of their daily arguments, but he just smiled at Nikolai to try to cheer him up. "To be honest, they should just end their relationship at this point" Sigma thought "Hold on, were they even together? Fyodor never said anything about that stuff.. but maybe he's quiet when it comes to that. He doesn't really show any sort of love or affection towards Nikolai.. so I still have my doubts. On one hand I feel quite bad for Nikolai, every day he gets this bad treatment. Does he really deserve it? On the other hand, Fyodor has clearly expressed himself to Nikolai. Oh well.." Nikolai, who was still bawling his eyes out like a little girl, started pacing up and down the room, complaining "Oh, Fyodor, why must this all be so complicated? Why can't you just accept my love?! WHY MUST I GO THROUGH THIS TORTURE?!" Sigma watched Nikolai, silently judging his decisions "I don't know how he lets this slide.. What does Fyodor do to him?" Nikolai sat down on a chair and hid his face in his hands "I just want to be loved by my darling Fyodor and I can't even get that! I'm just trying to make you feel loved and cared about, be the best for you and you still can't accept the fact that I LOVE you! WHY?!" Sigma walked up to Nikolai and put his hand on his shoulder in attempt to comfort him "Is there anything I can do to make you feel better?" Nikolai looked up at Sigma with tears streaming down his face "I DON'T WANT ANYTHING OTHER THAN FYODOR'S LOVE AND ID DO ANYTHING TO RECIEVE IT" he switfly stood up and ran out of the room. Sigma watched him and shook his head "I can't stand his constant whining about Fyodor.." he frowned and walked away. "Hello Sigma." He heard a voice behind him and turned around. It was Fyodor. "What's with the annoyed face?" "Oh, hello, Sir. It's just Nikolai. He seems to take everything you say very personally." Fyodor didn’t seem very bothered by that. "He deserves it" he said with an annoyed tone. "Don't you think you're taking it a bit too far, Sir? I mean, every day he cries about you. Maybe you should apologize.." Fyodor looked at Sigma coldly "are you telling me what to do?" Sigma quickly denied Fyodor's accusation. He didn't want Fyodor to get angry at him too. "No sir! I just-" but before Sigma could explain, Fyodor cut him off "Maybe it’s not that bad of an idea, actually" he said, seeming to consider that option. “Anyway, you may return to your work. I hope you know what to do” Fyodor turned around and started walking towards the room where Nikolai was.

As Fyodor entered, Nikolai was sobbing in a corner on his knees turned away from the door and covering his face with his hands. As soon as he noticed Fyodor, he quickly wiped away the tears from his face and tried to act as if he's okay "Oh, hello, darling!" Fyodor looked down at Nikolai with a deadly stare "How many times have I told you not to call me those things?" He walked over to Nikolai and slapped him. Nikolai put his hand on his cheek, where he could feel a burning pain and looked down sadly, the tears reforming in his eyes. Fyodor bent over, grabbed Nikolai by his hair and pulled it to make him look Fyodor straight in his eyes. "Pathetic. And that's all you'll ever be. Just a pathetic, weak and disgusting. Stop trying to live in your own ideal universe where I love you, because there is none. I could never love someone like you. I am a god and you are a useless pile of dirt. You are a disgrace to the DOA and I am ashamed of you. Never have I ever met a person who disgusts me more with their inability to accept the truth and deal with it. You’re such a delusional crybaby. Grow up and learn to accept that I will never, ever love you." Fyodor let go of Nikolai and turned around, leaving him to fall over. "Don't talk to me unless I allow you to. I want to forget your existence as good as I can" and then Fyodor left and closed the door loudly. Nikolai sat on his knees in the dimly lit room and stared into the void for a few minutes, completely broken and depressed, feeling all numb and devoid of emotion.

Sigma was conveniently walking by the room Fyodor had just ridiculed Nikolai in and as he saw Fyodor leave, he decided it was better to go check on Nikolai. As he walked towards the room, he realized there was no sound. No crying, no sobbing, no nothing. "Is Nikolai dead? Did Fyodor kill him?!" Sigmas thoughts were messing with him and he got worried and ran into to the room, only to see Nikolai looking out the window of the sky casino. "Oh, thank God. Now don't mess this up, you don't want to make him even more upset." Sigma started walking to Nikolai and looked out the window with him. "Are you okay, Nikolai?" Sigma spoke softly so that he wouldn't startle Nikolai and make him feel comforted after how Fyodor treated him. Nikolai avoided the question and kept staring out the window. "Isn't the weather just lovely?" Sigma noticed Nikolai didn't sound one bit sad when he spoke. He sounded.. empty. "Yes.. it is indeed.." Sigma sounded slightly concerned for Nikolai since he always had this happy and excited personality, but now it was the complete opposite. "Do you like birds? I love them. They can fly wherever they want, be completely free. I wish I could be like them, fly and be free.." Nikolai watched as a group of white doves flew by. Sigma was slightly confused by the random question, but didn't want to offend Nikolai so he just went with it. "Yes, that would be nice.." Sigma looked at Nikolai, he really didn't show any sign of emotion or feeling in him. "I wonder what Fyodor did to him to make him like this.. should I ask? No.. I shouldn't remind him.. I bet he was really harsh.." Sigma sighed and looked back out the window. After a while of admiring the blue sky, Nikolai broke the silence "Tell me, Sigma.. how do you think Fyodor would react if I died..?" Sigma was completely taken aback by the question "Huh?! What do you mean?!" Nikolai remained calm and turned towards Sigma, asking him more questions "Do you think Fyodor would care if I died? What would he do? Would he be happy? Would he cry? Would he feel regret? Tell me, Sigma" Sigma sighed, realizing there was no way of avoiding Nikolai’s questions. "Nikolai.. some people just do not fit together and that happens to everyone. We need to accept the fact that sometimes all we can do is move on. We can't spend our entire life sulking about one person when there are many more chances of finding great people. Especially don't sulk about someone who you know doesn't want anything to do with you. Just let them go and find more meaningful people. People who actually care for you. Nikolai, you need to stop obsessing over Fyodor and move on." Nikolai quietly listened to what Sigma had to say, and as he did so, he put his hand on the window frame. Sigma looked at Nikolai’s hand and started speaking with desperation in his voice. "Nikolai, I just want the best for you and I'm trying to give you advice. It pains me to see you in such despair because of your love for Fyodor. I'm sorry, but what he says is true. He’ll never be able to love you." Nikolai gripped the window frame tighter. Sigma started feeling very worried. "What are you doing?" A single tear rolled down Nikolai’s cheek. Sigma felt the fear build up in him. "Nikolai?! Tell me, what are you doing?!" Nikolai turned towards the window one more time "Sigma, do you remember how I said I always wanted to fly like a bird?" Sigma suddenly realized. His eyes shot wide open and he felt uneasy, as if it all was just a bad dream. "No! Nikolai, please don't!-" Nikolai took off his coat that let his create portals, basically teleport himself and objects. He got up on the window frame and looked over his shoulder, at Sigma. Sigma couldn't believe what he was witnessing and couldn't do anything but watch. "At least I had one real friend after all.." Nikolai smiled at Sigma as he let himself fall. Sigma snapped out of his paralysis and reached out to grab Nikolai, but he was too late. "NO! NIKOLAI!" he burst out into tears as he saw Nikolai falling, impossible to ever reach again.

Part 2 coming soon!

(Or not, depends on my time lol)

If you have any suggestions, tips, etc. I’d love to hear them!

[moon7jay]

i'll be honest, i was on a tumblr hiatus/break but then remembered cherry was supposed to come out and legit read it at like 3 am. i loved it so much like it was most definitely worth the suspense being built up, the preview was amazing and the final work was even better because it was just so well done. i like how much the character of yn was explored and not just left empty and blank like some writers do to make it more 'inclusive'. she had such a great character and it was probably the MOST relatable yn i've read or come across. i like how the bodily issues were explored and that although they played a pretty big role in shaping the character, they weren't what the character's personality is dependent on. they were a part of her insecurities which made her the type of person she was but it was portrayed and written in such a manner that it was clear that that isn't what her character arc is about. i think i have NEVER come across a fic which made me hate jay the loml, but your fic did it for me. I HATED HIS CHARACTER SO MUCH OH MY GOD. which only proves how well written it was, with the whole 'nice guy' persona, the smooth talker who is just another misogynist. now to heeseung's character, i love how he was a bit of a pushy person yet never overstepped his boundaries. he was clearly written to be a 'toxic' person and that shows, but it was clear he was self aware and ig he was trying to be better. i also loved the relationship dynamic she had with her family, how well written the relationship between her and her brother was, and, how sweet the dynamic between suzy and her was. overall it was an amazing fic and you overdid yourself. i am definitely gonna reread it as much as i can. if there's gonna be an epilogue i would love for it to explore some more on heeseung's character and heeyn's relationship together. that's it and take care, have a nice day love.

Oh my god first of all, thank you for taking so much time to write this message, I'm really overwhelmed by the love cherry has been receiving, I honestly have no words.

THANK YOU, I really wanted thos fic to be y/n centred, her life, her issues, what makes her HER, and what makes heeseung so obsessed with her, it all ties up to her character, so it needed to be explored. I'm soo glad you loved all the relationship dynamics😭I tried really hard to make them all blend in and look natural. Also I'm sorry that you related to this y/n, hugs for you 🫂🤍

Can't believe I made people hate jay, sorry jay loml I will still fuck you :(

Thank you thank you, I can't express my gratefulness 🥹🫶, there will definitely be an epilogue‼️ and I'll totally explore heeyn's relationship more in it, some fluff because y'all have had enough pain dosage.

You too take care luviee<333

[thebookreader12345]

750 Followers Celebration - Q&A

Thank you so much for supporting me through this journey! You guys don't know how much this means to me. Every single one of you is amazing.

Below the cut are my answers to the questions that you all submitted.

Q: Do you think Jay is going to become Sergeant this season? A: There has been a lot of debate over this question because of the past few seasons and all of the "Easter eggs", like the sergeant exam poster hanging in the background of the show. In my opinion, I do not believe Jay will become Sergeant. Yet. I think it won't be until the beginning of next season because, if this is a possible storyline, I would expect that the producers and writers would make the finale of season 9 about Voight stepping down/getting promoted, etc.

Q: Did Chicago Justice deserve more episodes? A: I'm sort of split with this question. I loved the fact that there was a big episode involving Kevin, and they always included people from Med, Fire, and PD in some of the episodes. However, the whole plot of the episodes was kind of slow because it wasn't like they were police officers and could go out and chase suspects and arrest people and what not. Their job was just to gather the evidence and then present it in court. I think for many, the show fell flat because there wasn't much action, and part of me does agree with that, but the whole idea of the show itself was kind of cool.

Q: What would make you stop watching each Chicago show? A: This is a tough question because I've only ever dropped one show that I can think of, and it was only because the plotline got really dumb. Maybe if some major characters died in each show I'd stop watching it? But then again, I love the One Chicago universe so much that I don't think even that would stop me from watching. So yeah. I really don't know.

Q: Do you believe in magic? A: As much as I would love for magic to be real, I don't believe it is. But I feel like everyone thinks that way. Cause lets be honest, Harry Potter and Disney make magic look so cool. However, we all know deep down somewhere that it's almost impossible for certain things to be real, and magic just so happens to be one of them.

Q: Are you superstitious? A: I'm not the most superstitious person out there, but I do somewhat follow a few superstitions. Whenever I find a penny on the ground with heads facing up, I pick it up because I believe I'll get good luck. Doing the whole "fingers crossed" thing is something I do a lot. I believe you shouldn't open an umbrella in the house or else you'll receive bad luck. Broken mirrors are bad omens. Those are the top 4 I believe in, but other than that, I'm not really too superstitious.

Q: Is your perception of yourself similar or the same to how others perceive you? A: I mean, I would hope so. I appreciate my level of smarts, and whenever my friends acknowledge them or compliment me on them it makes my day. However, with that, people think that I'm always only doing things to boost my intelligence. For example, I love to read. So whenever I say that I didn't do much over the weekend, people always assume that I read a bunch, when I really didn't. Or that I always study for tests or do homework like a week before it's do. That is not the case. But for the most part, I believe my perception of myself is the same as how other people perceive me.

Q: Who is your favorite couple on each One Chicago show? A: Okay, so for Med, there aren't really any couples at the moment besides Maggie and Ben, whom I love but they aren't my favorite, so I'm gonna pick a past couple. When I first started Med, Manstead was my prime ship, so I'll choose them. Will had been pining after Natalie for so long so I was glad when they finally got together. For Fire, it's gotta be Kelly and Stella. They were literally made for each other, and they support each other with everything. Also, they are so cute together and all of Firehouse 51 ships them as well! And for PD, while I do love Burzek, Upstead is my favorite ship at the moment. I've seen the connection between Hailey and Jay since season 5. You don't understand how angry I was in season 7 when Hailey was so close to confessing her feelings. So season 8 made me very happy when Jay and Hailey finally got together.

Q: Jay and Lindsey or Jay and Hailey? A: I respect everyone's opinions on this matter, so hopefully you all respect mine. I thought that Erin was almost toxic in a way for Jay. She continuously broke his heart when all he wanted to do was help him. But what really does it for me is that she left Chicago without telling him goodbye. Hailey, on the other hand, has pushed Jay to seek out help when he needed it, like when she recommended he take seeing a therapist seriously to help with his PTSD, and she is always there for him, no matter what. That's why I believe Hailey and Jay are the better pairing.

Q: Which character death got to you the most? A: There have been too many sad deaths in the One Chicago world. But if I had to pick one, I've gotta go with Otis on Chicago Fire. Otis was always one of my favorite characters, even way back when I watched Fire with my dad when it was first coming out. He was witty and funny, and his friendship with Cruz was everything. So, when I watched the episode where he died, I was full on balling. I had to pause the episode for 10 minutes because I couldn't stop.

Q: Who is your favorite character on each show and why? A: I'm gonna do favorite male and female character because I've got too many favorites from each show. On Med, my favorites are Will and Natalie. Will has been my favorite since day one, and I like that he will go out of his way to help patients, even if it means he could get in serious trouble. Natalie, even though she's not in the show, always pushes for the best of care for her patients, and whenever she dealt with kids it was always the sweetest thing. On Fire, I like Kelly and Sylvie. Kelly is so headstrong and driven, and he will do anything to protect the other members of Squad 3. Sylvie is such a hard worker and you can tell she is passionate about her job. I feel so bad that she's had to go through so many partners. On PD I love Jay and Hailey. Jay has not always been my favorite male character. Back when I watched the show for the first time, I adored Adam. However, I love that Jay has such good morals and is always pushing to do the right thing even when Voight disagreed. Now, it took a few episodes for me to warm up to Hailey, but after seeing her be so badass, it was hard not to like her.

Q: Where do you get inspiration for your stories?/How do you get inspiration when there's not a request? A: This question is always hard to answer because I really don't know. Most of the time I'm fulfilling requests sent in by you guys and I just write what comes to the top of my mind. If there are requests that are not requested and I come up with them on my own, chances are I saw the plot somewhere else, like in a book or show or movie, and I just tweaked it a bit to fit the One Chicago universe. Either that happens, or while I'm trying to fall asleep, I make up random scenarios in my head, and if I find one that I really like, I'll make a note of it on my phone so I don't forget it, and then I'll write about it.

Q: Do you think Brett and Casey are endgame? Why or why not? A: I'm gonna go with yes on this one. Now, Brettsey is not one of my top ships in the universe. However, they are cute together, and I've been expecting them to get together for a while. The two of them, even when Gabby was around, had a great relationship and always cared for each other. Plus, Matt jumped out of a firetruck to go help Sylvie when the ambulance flipped. He was willing to risk an injury just to make sure she was okay. And now that they are officially together in Chicago Fire, you can see that they really love and care for each other.

Q: What inspired you to start writing? A: I always seem to get this question whenever I do a q&a, but that's okay because I don't mind talking about it. I first got into stuff like this as a reader. Basically, I went on to Wattpad and Tumblr to read other people's stories. I had no intention of creating my own. And then, one day, I started imagining myself in some of the fandoms I was apart of, and I thought, "If I'm imagining myself in these fandoms, chances are others are too," and I began creating stories that followed the plots of movies and shows exactly, just adding Y/n in it. However, that got tiring after a while because I wasn't able to have much freedom because I was following a set script, and that's when I remembered I had a Tumblr account I never used. So, I revamped my account just a little bit and started posting story ideas I had that I couldn't post on Wattpad because either they didn't fit with the stories or they were for someone I didn't write for on Wattpad. And now, here we are. For anyone interested, I've posted this before but I'll post it again, my Wattpad handle is @Writer_Reader05.

Q: Jay or Will Halstead? A: I'm sorry, but I really can't choose between the two of them. I love them both so much. Will and Jay are two of my favorite characters in the whole One Chicago universe. While they do have some qualities that I'm not the fondest of, at the end of the day, I adore the both of them, and I could never choose between them.

Q: Who would you rather date: Jay or Will Halstead? A: Why do you guys do this to me? I love them both so much! But, if I have to choose, I'm gonna pick Jay. The only reason is because I like the characters in PD more than Med, so if I'm dating Jay, chances are I'm friends with Hailey and Adam and all of Intelligence. Will is just as awesome as Jay though and I feel like sometimes people sleep on that.

Q: Which of the requested fics you’ve written is your favorite? A: I think I'm gonna have to go with a Jay Halstead x reader I wrote titled Two Becomes Three. Something about the plot just makes me smile. And to think of Jay being a father......So yeah, while I have so many amazing requested fics thanks to you all, that one has to be one of my favorites.

Q: What’s your favorite series you’ve written so far? A: I love all of the series I have written. Something about creating a whole story that's more than just one part is always fun. If I have to pick one series, I'm gonna pick On the Loose. It was the first series I wrote on Tumblr and the plot of it is something I'm really proud of. However, From the Big Apple to the Windy City, Identity Loss, and Difference of Opinion are all amazing! The first two are finished series and the last one still has a few chapters left to go. Go check them out if you haven't already.

Q: What's your favorite imagine you've come up with and why? A: I don't have a lot of fics that are solely my ideas. Most of my stories have plots that were sent in by you all. However, if I had to pick a favorite out of my stories, it'd be Back Home for Christmas, a Halstead Sister fic I released when I was somewhat new to the platform. Something about writing sibling fics always makes me happy because I get to express the familial side to the characters.

Q: If you had to be roommates with 5 of your mutuals/fellow writers, who would you pick and why? A: I love all of my fellow writers/mutuals so much! I know how much work we put into whatever we post, and most of us are very active on this site. As for who I would pick to be my roommates, I'd choose @hereforhalstead @fighterkimburgess @halsteadlover @resanoona @sylviebrettsey because I feel like we'd all have great conversations, mainly over One Chicago. And every Wednesday night we'd all watch the episodes live together and experience them as a group and then freak out over what happened..........Now watch me fantasize about this all day.

Q: Do you listen to music when you write? A: It depends. On some days when I plan that I'm gonna write, then yes, I do put on some music. When there are days that I have a few minutes to spare, I don't put on music just because I'm only writing for a few minutes and I don't want to waste time. But mostly when I'm writing I do play music in the background.

Q: Do you know how your fics/stories end before you finish writing it? A: This is a really interesting question. The answer is no, I do not know how I'm gonna end a fic before I finish writing it. The only story I had a set ending for was my series On the Loose, but that one wasn't even fully planned out until I got a chapter or two in. Obviously, if I get a request that includes a set ending, like two characters get together or something like that, then I know what the ending will be. Otherwise, I have no clue.

Q: Have you ever met someone who had a very similar personality to your own? Did you get along? A: You know, I can't say that I have. Everyone is different in their own way, and that's what makes us all unique. I would imagine if I did meet someone with a similar personality we'd get along because we'd basically be a carbon copy of each other, but who knows. Maybe our similar personalities would cause us to clash.

Q: Do you hold yourself to higher standards than you hold others? A: Not really. I know myself more than anyone else so I know what my limits are and when I've reached them. With people, on the other hand, I always feel like they can be doing more with themselves and their lives. So I do not hold myself to higher standards than others.

Thank you to all of you who sent in questions! I never thought I'd reach 750 followers on this platform. The only reason I have is all thanks to you wonderful people out there!

@winterberryfox @maximeevansblog @scarletsoldierrr @i-like-sparkly-things @dreamingmanip @soph0864 @ryliegh8 @lorenakaspersen @wanniiieeee @nevertoofarfromivar @securityfriendly-jay @pinkbay-love @stephie123

[oftenderweapons]

Girls’ Night — a girlfriends’ tale

Characters: OCs (Vixen, Princess, Lace), small Namjoon intromission

Wordcount: 12.2k

Genre: slice of life with discussion of BDSM themes, conversation

Rating: suggested 18+

Hello doves! As I announced the other day, I have been working on extra pieces that I really loved as a concept. This one — I must admit — is especially dear to me since it covers topics that I consider extremely important. This fic discusses mature themes. Please minors, do not read or interact.

Quick recap: (read Jimin’s Love Talk if you want to know the whole background for this story) Princess — Jimin’s girlfriend — has ventured into the world of BDSM after Jimin expressed his interest in being dominated and spanked. A few days after her first brief session with Jimin, two old acquaintances come to her help: Vixen — Namjoon’s girlfriend and Princess’ high school classmate — and Lace, Vixen’s best friend, Princess’ university flatmate but also Taehyung’s latest crush. (Tae and Lace met through Vixen at Taehyung’s housewarming party). The girls meet for dinner at Princess’ apartment and after some confessions and girl talk, they explore the most important rules and procedures a person should know before dominating their partner in a basic impact play scenario, with special contributions of a trained domme and an experienced brat. 

The piece is written with the girls as characters described through the POV of an external narrator. If you want to get to know the characters a bit better, you can find their headcanons here (Vixen — Princess — Lace).

On a lexical note: throughout the text I’ve used the word “dom” both as in short of the verb and of the noun. Even though the feminine form is usually “domme”, I’ve considered it gender neutral, as a short term for both “dominator” and “dominatrix”. 

On an ethical note: I wanted to raise awareness on how a safe, sane and consensual domination works. These days there’s an increasing number of BDSM pieces coming out, and very few of them mention the level of emotional connection that is necessary in these circumstances. Most of them focus on the scene, without showing how pre-session negotiations, aftercare and post-session feedback work. I wanted this piece to be educational and I wanted to show the “background work” on how I plan each BDSM-themed piece before I write it. Though I’ve done a lot of research on handbooks, websites and forums, I am NOT a BDSM educator, so I would recommend reading more in-depth manuals in case you ever decided to venture in this world, and possibly speak with an expert first.

On to trigger warnings: swearing, consumption of alcohol, obviously there is in-depth discussion of NSFW and BDSM themes with focus on impact play. Discussion of hard limits, negotiations, SSC (safe, sane, consensual), safewords, aftercare, bruising, cutting/puncturing (connected with cane and cat-o-nine-tales whipping), marking, pain kink, punishment, drop (both for subs and doms), anatomy of impact play (where to hit, how to hit), sex toys (spanking, face slapping, paddle, riding crop, slapper, strap, whip, flogger, cane). That should be all. In terms of angst, there is some insecurity, jealousy, and slightly traumatic past experiences. Lace recalls one time she “dropped”, Vixen recalls a series of quite intense scenes. There are mentions of Vixen’s second relationship (toxic relationship with a man who called her out for her sex drive, kinkshamed her and forced her into becoming exclusively vanilla). Both Princess and Vixen mention abandoning some friends since they couldn’t trust them close to their boyfriends, or not respecting their privacy. Lace mentions traumas that lead her to learn domination. She also explains her insecurities about possibly dating Taehyung.

Word count: lengthy. 12.2k words. Reading is not necessary but recommended since a lot of pieces stem directly from this one. 

Here is my masterlist!

Enjoy 💖

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EDIT: You can find part two here

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Lace came through with the loud stomps of the heels of her boots, the bag on her shoulder swaying heavily. It looked like she was ready to enter Cat Woman mode, wearing a cropped leather jacket rimmed with a thick black-fur neck. Her wondrous thighs were clad in tight, high-waisted jeans, her black leather knee boots completing the look. She impeccably wore her part.

As she neared the door, she checked her watch, noticing that she was a couple minutes early.

Five minutes later, always fashionably late, arrived Vixen, her hair falling perfectly around her pretty face, her lips tinged with a deep wine red, her doe eyes as inquisitive and wide as usual. It was exactly the girl she had met two years before on the other side of the counter of her shop, it looked like she hadn't aged a week.

"Hello!" She greeted her friend.

"Hi there! Look at you, you look like the best girlie in the world." Lace hollered back.

"Because I am." Vixen replied, basking in the attention and the praises.

"That self esteem is thriving! Freshly fucked and ready to misbehave?"

"Unfortunately not freshly enough, but you know me, I'm always ready to misbehave." Vixen winked before making her way to the entrance of the building, pressing the buzz for Princess' apartment.

"Isn't your big boy attending to his duties?" Lace asked, curious about the whole situation. She had personally met Namjoon and had seen the two of them together. They looked like the it-couple and she would gladly bet big money on the pair. Plus she knew about Vixen's collection and Namjoon's taste in terms of lingerie and negligees: in her honest opinion that's a solid base for a lasting union.

"He's attending, yes, but I don't want to vex him with my continuous cravings."

"Baby, not all of us are like that slut-shaming bastard of your ex. Stop thinking that needing to get laid more than once a week is a shame."

Princess voice sounded from the intercom. "Hi! It's floor 16 number 41!"

"Thank you!" Vixen replied before pushing the door open.

Lace slapped her hand and held the door as Vixen walked through. The other followed. "It's just that… He's been busy, plus he keeps saying he likes to come back early so we can have dinner together, he's always rushing from the studio to the dorms to his apartment. He looks like he'll get drunk on motion sickness before the tour even starts."

Lace stared at her feet as you both stood in the lift. How could she start something serious with Taehyung if they were going on tour? By the time she would get used to him he would be travelling on the other side of the world.

"So he stays at the dorms?" Lace fixed her bag on her shoulder.

"Often, yes. He stays at the apartment when I'm around, but he prefers the dorms when he's by himself or working."

The lift dinged and you exited, heading down the hallway "Thirty-eight, forty, there!" Lace chirped, noticing the open door.

There stood Princess, hair in a ponytail, wearing a fashionable white turtleneck and a thigh knee-length skirt. She looked classy and smart, just like she had appeared during previous meetings.

"Hello girls!" She waved at the pair, gesturing at them to come in.

"Hi there!" said Lace, "long time no see."

"We don’t see each other in ages and then two times in less than a month." Princess replied while hugging her. “Wouldn’t it be lovely if we reacquainted?”

Vixen nodded with a cute smile. "It would. I must say it was a surprise to meet you at the party with Jimin." Vixen took off her shoes as Princess offered her a pair of slippers.

"It seems like fate brought us back together." Princess replied.

“Indeed.” She commented, thinking about how they would get even closer if she gave in to the preternatural connection with Taehyung. Lace tugged at her boots, fighting with them a little before finally removing them, lost in her thoughts. She clumsily tried to avoid Vixen’s stare. She knew the girl would spot her secret in a second. Not now, she told herself. With the slippers on, Lace still looked like Catwoman from the ankles up, but her feet were clad with a pair of pink panther slippers that gave the outfit a hilarious twist.

"Let's move to the kitchen," Princess said, leading the way. "The apartment is small, sorry."

"Don't worry sweetie, with a view like this I would gladly live in a shoebox." Vixen commented, looking out of the window. "Plus you live pretty high up."

"It was accidental. I just needed something close to my office."

"What did you end up doing?" Lace asked as she looked at the prints on the wall.

"I work for a fashion magazine. Usually I do model casting and a little bit of everything about organising photoshoots." Princess replied.

"That sounds great!" Lace exclaimed, grinning.

Princess clumsily opened a bottle of wine, but fortunately no damage resulted. "What about you?"

"I'm a shop assistant in a lingerie shop." Lace replied.

"Don't diminish yourself like that." Vixen said, looking away from the window. "She works at the La Perla boutique in Gangnam, plus she has her own studio where she creates customised orders." The woman patted her friend on the shoulder. "She's amazing."

Princess lit up. "So you managed to make part of your dream come true!"

"A small part. I'm still far from having my own shop." Lace exhaled.

"But she's getting there." Vixen added with a positive note.

"I ordered in a little bit of everything." Princess said, taking the food out of the oven. "I didn't trust my cooking skills knowing this one." She pointed at Vixen. "I've heard you're almost a chef."

"I just took lessons." She shrugged. "I just really like everything that feels like home."

Sniffing at the air, Vixen sparked up, getting cozy at the smell of bulgogi. "This smells very nice."

"A little bird told me it's your favourite." Princess winked.

"Do I know that little bird?"

"He knows you very well." Princess said, admiring how the polished, elegant woman-girl turned completely smitten.

"I'll make sure to thank him."

Lace snickered. "Do you need help?" She offered, while Princess laid out a bunch of smaller plates and bowls with side dishes. "I got some dumplings, pancakes and our baby's favourite: braised potatoes."

Vixen clapped enthusiastically.

Dinner proceeded calmly, all the partakers digging in quietly, chitchatting between one serving and another, catching up on the various mishaps that had happened during those years apart.

"So you studied in Europe, right?" Princess asked Vixen.

"I spent almost two years between France and England, yes." She replied politely, sipping her wine composedly as if she hadn't devoured her serving of potatoes like a very smug wolf.

"Cool. But you came back here." Princess continued.

"Yes, I missed home. And I missed jajangmyeon." Vixen grinned. "Food in general. I like my life here. Living in Europe to me felt like being continuously on the sidetrack of something. Catching up with the culture is seriously a challenge, especially when you're in the art world."

"Right, you're an interior designer." Princess reminded herself.

"Exactly."

"I've heard you met Namjoon because of that."

Vixen smiled. "Yeah, well… The usual. We met at a gallery, I had a meeting with the artist and he accidentally participated. The artist and the director of the gallery accompanied us through the exhibition and at the end he asked if I wanted to grab a coffee. At the beginning I thought it strange that he hadn't booked a private visit, but he said that because of a last minute plan he had begged the director to book him in anytime. Since I'm friends with the director and I have strict privacy agreements at the firm, the curator thought it was a good idea."

"Who would have thought, uh?" Lace chirped in, laying her chopsticks on her empty bowl.

"Y'all, soju?" Princess asked, now that they were all done with the food.

While Vixen nodded, Lace held back. "I think I'll take just a sip. It gets me bloated."

The table was clean, the small cups for soju laying on the table as Princess shook the bottle and poured it according to tradition.

"Cheers to your taken asses and my single one." Offered Lace, the three of them laughing and downing the liquid. Princess drank it without even blinking, Lace taking it in a small measured way while Vixen downed it and scrunched her nose, shutting her eyes tight and shaking her head as she processed the burn.

"You're still a doll." Princess commented.

"And you're still otherworldly cool." Vixen replied, smirking. "You were the most bad ass girl of the class. I had lots of respect for you, but I was so scared of approaching you."

"You were so tiny and shy." Princess gushed. "You were everyone's crush but you were so smart. And a bit strange. It felt wrong to even think of you like that."

Vixen shook her head, "It feels strange to bring up those memories. After university and being abroad it feels like another life."

"Because many things changed in the meantime." Lace argued. "I've known you since you started working, two years ago."

"I spent half of my first paycheck at your shop."

"You did. And I asked you for coffee because I liked your sense of fashion."

"I thought you wanted to date me." Vixen laughed.

"Well, when you're done snuggling your big bear, you know you can come to me." Lace winked.

"My bear is pretty big so it might take me a while to be done with that." Vixen joked. "Plus I'm pretty happy. I haven't been this happy since I was nineteen. I'm content. Satisfied. Taken care of. Loved. I'm thriving." She closed her eyes and shrugged, smiling.

"My bad." Lace patted her own shoulder in support. "What about you and Jimin?"

"Oh, we met during a photoshoot. I assisted in his shoot and when he was done he asked to see the pictures that would feature on the magazine. That's when he asked me out for dinner." Princess said, her eyes shining as she remembered the event.

Lace noticed the two women staring at her. "Well time for my story… Me and my dildo met at the store, he was cute, I was needy and I invited him to my bed. That's how we first met and we've been happy ever since." Lace told emotionally. The other two burst out laughing, Vixen holding her belly while Princess leaned on the table.

"Oh goodness." The smaller one said.

"I think it's time we face our main topic. Would you like to start?." Lace asked Princess.

"Okay. I'll be very direct." Princess warned.

"Don't worry, we're all grown ups here. You're safe, darling." Vixen stretched her arm out to caress her forearm. "And we're pretty open minded, trust me."

"Okay. Basically, Jimin would like me to get a bit more rough in the bedroom. Namely, we tried spankings the other week. He sort of power-bottomed? Like he gave me instructions on how to do it."

Lace nodded.

"I am worried about how to handle this. I want to do it, but I don't know how to do it right. I don't want to hurt him." Princess said with a frown. “And I’m a little worried I liked it so much.”

Lace’s lips formed a small conspiratorial smile. “At the beginning there’s always a little bit of fear. And a bit of… Shame.”

“Yes.” Princess confirmed. “But it’s not something that bothers me. Like, it’s there but it doesn’t bother me. I don’t think it will persist. When I think about what we did… Well, I’m almost proud.”

Lace smirked and nodded. “That’s good. What would you like to work on? Is it just impact play — you called it "spanking" — or is it also domination on a broader sense?"

"Well… Wait, I took notes." Princess looked around, walking towards her bedroom and coming back with a small notebook and the guide.

"It's the book!" Lace exclaimed.

"The book." Vixen wiggled her eyebrows knowingly.

"You, vixen." Lace smirked. "Namjoon is right calling you that."

"You have no idea." The other replied. "Now, let's see."

"I'll return you the book." Princess reassured her.

"You can keep it for another bit. You'll need it again with Jimin."

"We have our own copy, don't worry." Princess replied, with a quick smirk. "Well, I think I can dom pretty fine — as I read the book I realised I already have some of those behaviours. However there are some practices I might have to learn in person."

"Normally we teach how to dom through subbing: what you experienced the first time with Jimin was subliminally subbing." Lace took the reins and explained. "It is one of the most sophisticated forms of domming — being a power bottom — and the fact that he did that should suggest you that A — he's a very skilled sub, or B — he's generically a very smart person with good manipulative skills."

Princess listened to the explanation quite raptured. "Personally, I don't know how far he's gone with his exes but I would say he has taken the lead before and he's quite used to speak up and order me around a little, so his behaviour might come from that."

Lace nodded. "I would recommend that you talk to him and try to design a specific plan for the two of you. As I hinted before I have taken lessons on BDSM practices in a club here in the city. I have received almost two years of training and I have taken part as an assistant to a teacher for another two years, that's why I might sound academic and serious. You can stop me whenever you feel uncomfortable or when you need to ask a question." That's when Lace shifted. Her whole position changed: her back got straighter and her hands splayed on the table, somehow squaring her position.

"Okay." Princess confirmed.

"You know that during university I took that course on acrobatic yoga?" Lace asked.

Princess frowned. "Yeah, I remember."

"Well, it wasn't exactly acrobatic yoga." Lace shrugged and raised her eyebrows. "At the beginning I did do some acrobatic yoga lessons but then one of the students introduced me to this BDSM course and I left yoga for… yeah, you know." Lace laughed.

Vixen listened quietly, observing Princess' reaction.

"Would you consider taking lessons from an expert?" Lace asked.

Princess shrugged. "I think that the book was very good on general analysis. Personally, I've never considered meeting an expert mostly because I wouldn't know where to look for one. Plus, I've only had a week to think about this."

Vixen looked at Lace. "I'll be very blunt here, darling. I think that the best thing to do would be discussing the whole book thing with Jimin. Have pre-session negotiations. Discuss stuff. Find out what you want to explore and go there together."

Lace raised an eyebrow. "However, it is perfectly okay if you want to practice by yourself. Being a good dominant means that you can convey control and safety through your stance and behaviour. That requires practice."

Vixen nodded before adding, "It's okay if you want to take some steps by yourself before bringing him into the equation."

"Okay, so I reckon you have quite some knowledge on the theme. Maybe you could teach me something?" Princess asked Lace, a bit shy but fully determined.

Lace smirked. "That's why I came prepared. However, I must remind you I have been a co-trainer, and that doesn't mean I am a teacher, therefore I can only cover the basic stuff, which for now will suffice."

Vixen's eyes burned expectantly.

"Our girl here might help you see stuff through a submissive's eyes, right?" Lace questioned.

Vixen nodded and smiled, reassuring Princess by placing a hand on top of hers.

"Okay. Let's talk about general principles. BDSM is an acronym for Bondage, Domination, Sadism and Masochism. But I guess you read this in the book." Lace presented.

Princess nodded.

"The golden rule is SSC: Safe, Sane, Consensual. Use protection and make sure that you're both tested and clean if you go without a condom or dental dams. Also, keep your toys clean. Do not start anything if your judgement is clouded — by alcohol, drugs or violent, instinctual emotions. Make sure that both you and your partner want the same things. Explain what is going to happen and negotiate before each session — at least for the first few times. This is also the right moment to talk about safe words."

"Me and Jimin covered these already." Princess noted.  

“Then you’re already halfway there. The biggest part of training is making people always aware of all the steps that could possibly go wrong and make sure that you’re prepared for the worst case scenario.”

Vixen nodded. “As a sub, it is important to feel safe. An anxious sub is a sub who can hardly feel pleasure, and that invalidates the experience as a whole. We only do it for pleasure.”

Princess listened carefully and thought about it a little. “How… How does it feel…To be a sub? I mean, I’ve sort of subbed with Jimin but… Yeah.”

“Well, I’m leaning-sub. That means I rarely dom, and when I do I’m a power bottom — that thing that Jimin did when he gave you instructions on how to dominate him. Being a sub has a lot to do with feeling cherished and taken care of. Some of us are not comfortable with power and responsibilities. Some of us simply like to be told what to do and please. I like doing what Joon tells me to do and do it perfectly the way he wants it to be done, because I know he will praise me and reward me. I know that he loves me regardless of me doing what he wants, but it pleases me immensely to use my submission to show him how far my trust and love for him go. I feel safe when I'm in his hands. And I like punishment, it helps me deal with guilt. When I make a mistake, I always torture myself with guilt and self-hate, but punishment makes me feel like I've made a mistake and I've paid for it. The point is not the punishment, but rather the forgiveness and the sense of atonement afterwards." Vixen spoke with a composed attitude, however her eyes wandered around nervously, as if trying to avoid meeting the others’ gazes.

"In that case the dominant is supposed to be attentive in terms of how far the submissive pushes themself. A sub looking for forgiveness is a sub willing to go further than normal, which means that they might inadvertently reach their breaking point — which shall never happen." Lace highlighted.

"The golden rule is to always leave hungry. There is a fine line between satiety and nausea. The moment you overstep and reach nausea is the moment your sub might hurt themself." Vixen said, tight lipped.

Princess nodded. "I'm glad we can have this conversation. It's not something I can quite talk about with my friends since the whole situation with the boys is pretty delicate. I had to close some of those friendships to keep Jimin safe. I realised I couldn't trust some of those people and I'm glad I realised before it was too late."

Vixen’s leg started bouncing. “Same with Joon. I don’t have that many friends in the city, mostly because of the time abroad and the fact that all of the friends I had by now are married and/or with kids. I couldn’t trust many of them, but you —” she said, gesturing towards Lace, “and when I introduced you to Namjoon I told him you were one of the most discreet people in the world, because you value your privacy and other people’s privacy because of your, uhm, lessons.”

“It feels good to have someone to share this burden with. I’m pretty scared of the tour.” Vixen looked down. The poised young woman seemed to crumble, giving space to an insecure little creature. “We’ve been dating since last November, but our relationship hasn’t really begun until late February. To be honest I’m terrified.”

Both Lace and Princess reached out for her.

“I’m scared.”

“Have you told him?”

“Yes, he knows.” Vixen sparked up for a minute. “We talk a lot. He always asks me how I feel about things. Lately I’ve been spending all my time away from work with him. It’s been… maybe three days since I last went back to my apartment. And in the last month or so I’ve slept alone maybe three or four nights. I don’t know what I’ll do when he’s away.” Vixen’s eyes welled up with tears before she smiled classily and recomposed herself. “But that’s not relevant.”

“It is, baby.” Princess rubbed her shoulder. “You have my number. You can reach out to me anytime.”

“I’ll be there too, you know. I know I’m not your Big Bear, but I can cook and I’m an excellent vintage movie marathon partner.” Lace rubbed the other shoulder, catching the few tears that had fallen. This was a further confirmation that Namjoon was the right man for Vixen: he had reached out to Lace a few weeks after they had been introduced, asking her if it was cool if he asked her updates on Vixen during the tour, mostly because he knew she would put up her strong, charming face in front of him, but secretly she would be worrying over his absence. That brought them close; it felt good to create this safety net for Vixen and it felt even better to know her in the hands of a man worthy of her, attentive despite his busy schedule and strong work ethic.

“Thank you, girls. That’s really sweet of you.”

“You’re the one who made this possible,” said Princess, gesturing to the three of them sitting at the table together. “I owe you. And I reckon this is a good time to make amends for not making friends with you in high school.” Princess laughed. “We’ll all need each other. We could have a group chat with Jin’s girlfriend too. Plus Jimin mentioned Yoongi is seeing someone.”

“Yes, Namjoon mentioned too. I’ve heard she’s a lawyer. He’s got this insanely huge crush on her.” Vixen giggled. “I haven’t met her yet but I’ve heard they were supposed to go out tonight.”

“Maybe we’ll see her at the next gathering.” Princess wondered. “I must admit I’m curious.”

“I am too.”

Lace felt a bit out of the conversation. “Me and Taehyung have been texting.”

Vixen blinked and turned to her. “What?” She had this face that read perfect confusion. “How long? And you’ve never told me? I mean, I gave him your number but I didn’t—”

“It’s because I haven’t been really taking him into consideration until recently.” Lace replied. “Normally I would reply to him with small texts, just to avoid sounding rude.”

“You mean to tell me you have Taehyung wrapped around your little finger — Kim Heartthrob Taehyung — and you weren’t even interested? Have you been doing drugs too?” Vixen looked outraged. “Fucking insane.” She shook her head.

“You know me. I value my privacy. Do you know how fucking un-private it is to potentially date that man? What if they find out about my extracurriculars?” Lace pointed out.

Vixen exhaled and formed a tight-lipped smile.

“Don’t give me the disappointed mom look.” Lace replied. “Plus I’m the same age as you, you have no right to turn judgemental.”

“Of course.” Vixen nodded. “Your safety first, love.”

“It’s just that I want to, but I can barely imagine how fucked up that could be.”

Princess breathed out. “Jimin and I have been extremely private about us and me being so close to the press means I am risking so much.” Princess opened her arms wide. “But it would take a catastrophe to take him away from me.”

“Give him a chance. Tell him about everything outright and let him choose. He’ll take his chance. Don’t choose for him.” Vixen pointed out. “That’s how I did with Joon. We talked and clearly said ‘this is what I need and what I can give, can you comply? Are you okay with it?’ It’s a bit of a bet, but I think the prospect of gain outweighs the actual risk of it.”

Lace nodded. “And then there’s the tour.”

Vixen and Princess nodded. Vixen tried to keep her insecurity and jealousy at bait. All those girls drooling over him, all those female staff members travelling with him. She propped her elbows on the table and pressed her forehead against her palms, her lovely hair falling forward.

Princess, sitting beside her, rubbed her back. “What if you just give him one date. Tell him your situation both about your, uhm— hobby and your emotional state. I’m sure he will understand. His emotional intelligence is impressive.” Princess stated, nodding, her hand still rubbing Vixen’s spine.

“He’s the kind of man I would gladly be a sucker for.” Lace explained. “I knew I was a dom since I was eighteen, but Jesus, I know I would sub for him.” Vixen seemed to awaken at that comment. “I’ve seen his stages. He is insane.” Lace bit her lip. “But I need time to trust him. And it would feel useless to get cosy with him only to have him leave for the tour.”

“Just tell him.” Vixen encouraged her. “He will surely work with you on a compromise.”

“I’ll talk to him tomorrow. Are you okay?” Lace checked in on Vixen.

“Yup. Just a sudden jealousy rush.”

Lace frowned. “He would never. Don’t worry about that.” Lace cocked her head to the side. “He worships the ground you step on.”

“Girls throw thems—”

“He throws himself at you.” Lace remarked. “Plus he loves you. You love him. That’s all that matters. He gave you the passcode to his house, basically made you move in, what else do you need? I bet he’d gladly handcuff himself to you if you asked kindly enough.” Lace joked.

“Scratch that ‘kindly enough’. He’d cuff himself to you without you even asking.” Princess remarked.

“Can we move back to the BDSM introductory lessons?” Vixen asked, shaking her head, but with a tiny smile on her face.

Lace saw that was a good sign. Princess smiled beside her. “Okay, I’ll go with my request. I know I told you I wanted to get to know more of impact play and if we could focus on that...”

“Yes, I get where you’re headed. Let’s get it. But we’ll need a clean table for this.” Lace explained.

“Let’s do this.” Princess stood up from the table, beginning to clean up everything. It took the girls only a couple minutes to get rid of dirty dishes, empty boxes, the glasses and the soju. Even the fruit basket the guests had bought was moved on the kitchen counter.

“Do you have any sanitizer, perhaps?” Lace asked.

“Isn’t it better if we move to the sofa?” Suggested Vixen. “Use the coffee table?”

Princess shrugged. “Same to me.”

Lace nodded convincedly. “Let’s prep the coffee table. Sorry for the main table.”

Princess shrugged. “Needed to clean it anyways.”

A few minutes later the girls were all sitting around the coffee table, Lace’s bag placed at her side while Vixen occupied her other side, Princess sitting in front of them.

“Let’s do an impact play in depth analysis. What you need is one — a dom, two — a sub, three — optional, — supplies.” Lace listed. “Let’s go a bit at a time. First, the dom. A dom must be sober, lucid. No alcohol, drugs, and most importantly, no impulsive, instinctual emotions. If you’re furious, don’t go there. Violent emotions can cloud your judgement. Don’t let those lead you. Of course you might be angry or aroused, but that must not take the lead. If your anger makes you want to give them fifty spanks, but normally your sub can take twenty, you can negotiate maybe twenty-five. Be judicious, never hungry.”

“Good.” Said Princess, focusing on every single one of Lace’s words.

“Once you’re sure you’re in a coherent, calm mindset, you should negotiate with your sub. Remember: safe, sane, consensual. Safe, in this case, involves that your supplies are clean and cannot hurt your sub, both in terms of cleanliness and state of use. Check for loose threads, scratches on leather that could possibly host bacteria or dirt, splinters in case of wooden devices, porous surfaces. We’ll talk about this more accurately in the supplies section. Sane means to check your mindset and your sub’s mindset. Same rules as before: no alcohol, drugs, violent emotions.”

Vixen made eye contact with Lace, silently requesting permission to speak. “Small note on that, may I?”

Lace nodded.

“Your sub might come to you while being emotionally unstable. They might need you for comfort or atonement. Make sure to heal that emotionally before dealing with it sexually. It means to discuss what caused the upset state of mind in order to identify the real entity of the problem, correct the perception of it and negotiate the atonement.”

“Excellent point.” Replied Lace.

Vixen smiled cutely.

“Can I have an example?” Asked Princess with a frown.

“Of course. Let’s say I fucked up at work, I booked the wrong artwork and the artwork they wanted is no longer available. I manage to find an alternative but I somehow feel like I let down my client. I go home and I am scolding myself because I didn’t deliver what was asked of me. My dom may spot my disappointment or may recognise self-punishment. Also, I might explicitly tell my dom I am not feeling well due to a sense of guilt. This leads to my dom asking me why I am upset or why I am punishing myself. I — along other perfectionists like Jimin — tend to overestimate my mistakes, making them a bigger deal than what they actually are. My dom corrects my perspective through objective analysis, underlines my successful abilities in dealing with the issue and suggests potential improvements on those things I didn’t manage to solve. Perfectionists have a strict inner judge that scolds them and punishes them. Therefore their psych is divided into victim and punisher. This fracture obviously causes discomfort. The dom’s goal is to heal this fracture, especially since the perfectionist’s “punisher” side — so to say — is very strict and usually overestimates the damage and subsequently overestimates the punishment. After correcting the perception of the mistake, the dom gives an appropriate price for atonement.”

“So the goal is to stop the guilt trip mechanism?” Princess asked.

“Yes.” Vixen confirmed. “But this is just one kind of spanking. There are other cases. It can be educational or simply sexual. Educational is when the dom corrects the sub’s behaviour because they violated a rule or an order. In that case it’s mostly dom-initiated—”

“Unless the sub willingly misbehaved to earn a punishment.” Lace added.

“That sounds Jimin.” Princess commented, rubbing her forehead.

Vixen smiled widely.

“That’s not funny, you brat!” Lace scolded her.

“When you find your sub willingly misbehaving, you should talk to them very clearly. Usually they do it to attract attention. Ignoring them might hurt them or bring them to further misbehaviour, which can turn dangerous. I normally recommend conversation.” Lace explained. “Pay attention to them and ask why they broke the rule, what they were trying to get out of it. You can give them the punishment they were asking for — for example if your sub disobeyed because it earns them spanks and they like spanks, you can either give them spanks or punish them with something that they really don’t like, for example edging.”

Princess nodded. “That’s interesting, thank you.”

“Any remark, Vixen?”

She shrugged. “No, I don’t think so.”

“What about sexual spanks?” Princess questioned.

“Those can be incorporated into foreplay. Some people are simply aroused by pain.” Vixen shrugged. “It puts the sub into a vulnerable position, and it underlines a power imbalance. It makes the sub feel smaller, powerless — or almost so — and sometimes humiliated.” Vixen explained.

“Exactly. I would add that it stimulates the circulation of blood to the pelvis region, which means that skin is more sensitive, arousal increases and the whole perception intensifies. It builds trust and sometimes, according to personal history of each sub, it can send them back to childhood memories, mimicking the power imbalance between child and adult who disciplined them. It has strong disciplinary and educational value, back to the punishment scene.”

“Oh, about punishment!” Vixen exclaimed. “We forgot the most important part of it all. But it refers to all sorts of spanking, to be true. Negotiation. Once you have identified the fault, tell your sub how many hits there will be, how you will deliver them and with which instrument, which position they will have to assume. Repeat safewords. Make sure that they agree fully to every detail of the spanking. If they do not agree to some parts, ask to find a compromise, a middle ground between your and their needs. Once you have the green light, you can talk your sub through the whole experience as the scene actually develops. Once you are done with the scene, say a code phrase that means that the scene has finished.”

“Okay, me and Jimin did this stuff our first time trying this.” Princess confirmed.

“Wonderful. Was it a positive experience? Did you have any uncertainties, questions?”

“It was a very positive experience, both in mine and his opinion. We talked it out the morning after, since I preferred to have some time to elaborate my personal feelings about the scene”

“That’s okay. As a dom you can experience mixed feelings, especially after a first scene, with activities that are usually misjudged by society”. Lace explained, gently patting Princess’ hand on top of the table.

“I think that Jimin’s positive reaction and guidance helped me feeling positive about the whole scene. He was truly supportive through all of it.” Princess smiled softly.

“That’s a good partner. Both for life and for play”. Lace smiled herself, glad that Princess’ first experience went well.

“There were very deep emotions of care and support and love during the whole scene. A kind of affection and vulnerability I had never experienced with anyone else. I hope I can go there again with him, but next time I want to be more reliable and secure and experienced. I thought that a general introduction, especially about supplies, could help me, since Jimin was interested in that.”

“Okay, let’s just finish the general intro. We were saying safe, sane and consensual. Safe means toys, safewords and aftercare supplies. Sane means both parties know what they’re doing, the dom is aware of the sub’s mental space. Consensual means negotiation about number of blows, technique, position and eventually toys. Make sure that your sub always knows about the motive of the spanking. The natural response, especially to pain, is ‘why’. Make sure they know. Eventually, remind them. Once more remind them of safewords and the final sentence.”

“Do not ever stop unless they safeword.” Vixen said. “If they repeatedly tell you to stop, remind them they have their safewords if they want to. As a sub I’ve said both ‘stop’ and ‘why’ at least a hundred time during a spanking. ‘Stop’ and similar are pretty recurrent. Just say ‘You know your safeword, love’. If they really need them, they will use them, trust me. Just remind them all the time. You could maybe need to slow down, make sure that they aren’t panicking and they do actually remember their words.”

“Yes, that’s right.” Lace confirmed before turning to Vixen. “Have you been studying?” She joked.

“I’ve been reading lately.” Vixen confirmed, with a very happy smile on her face.

Lace mirrored her expression. She knew Vixen had been pushed into quitting BDSM activities by her ex boyfriend. Knowing that she was finally back to something she liked, something she was comfortable with made her happy. “I’m glad you’re back on track, sweetie.”

“Thank you.” Vixen closed the small exchange with Lace.

“Once a scene is closed, your sub might have different responses. They might ask to be left alone. In that case, make sure that healing supplies are ready for their self care. Remind them to check for abrasions. If the skin is damaged on a surface level — that means it is not only bruised, but also broken — you will need disinfectant and probably band aids.” Lace explained.

“But that happens rarely, right?” Vixen asked.

“With average spanking, that is quite rare. Normally you need specific instruments specifically meant to cause abrasions.”

“Like canes and spiked toys?”

“Yes, but not only those. I’ve seen pretty heavy damage caused by an apparently regular flogger.” Lace commented, shuddering at the memory.

Vixen blinked, a bit shocked. “Okay, back to aftercare.”

“Yeah,” said Princess, exhaling and looking away.

“So, unless your sub wants you to leave, you stay around. Provide for them. Rub lotion first. Some subs store specific lotion for this kind of stuff. To ease the burn, the sting, or lessen the bruises.”

Vixen interrupted. “I must say, most of us like the bruises and the reminder-sting, so they don’t really do much about it. Still, it depends on how far you’ve gone and how the sub feels. Usually, my favourites are a cold cloth, lotion and if I went particularly far maybe a painkiller. Normally herbal lotion and muscle relaxant are an excellent solution. They’re softer and safer, especially since you never know how a sub might react to medicines. As usual, make sure that whatever you use on them is safe. Let them prepare their usual medication. Make sure you have plenty of time to ascertain that they are emotionally stable. Do not leave them alone unless they request so, and tendentially it is good etiquette to stay in proximity, in case they change their mind.”

“Thank you so much for all the head ups.” Princess said, true gratitude shining all over her face. “I feel more comfortable knowing that we followed those lines during the first time too. It’s not something absurd. Youjust really need to use your common sense.”

Vixen nodded. “Being smart sure helps, but it’s not everything. You can only truly learn it by making it a routine.”

“You mean practice?” Princess questioned.

Lace nodded. “Yes. Once you actually start practicing, you’ll immediately find out your forte and potential weaknesses. Be comfortable with those: you can ask us or look it up on the guide, or on BDSM blogs. I can send you reliable sources, if need be. I would say you can reach out to my dungeon, it is a safe and discreet environment, but I fully understand your position, and I get that you might prefer to have a private approach to this. You can eventually book personal appointments with an expert. Those normally include non-disclosure agreements and Jimin could be protected from the public eye, as far as it can go.” Lace explained. “We have had many, many clients who have requested so. It would be perfectly normal.”

Princess thought about it and nodded. “I’ll discuss it with Jimin.”

“Perfect. As you can see the key to this is communication.”

“Indeed.” Confirmed Princess.

“Now, let’s get down to the actual business.” Lace opened the bag but left all the contents inside. “Impact play can happen on different parts of the body. Vixen?” Lace called.

Vixen stood up gingerly.

“Tie your hair, doll.” Lace reminded her.

The woman fished a ribbon from her pocket and did a soft ponytail.

“Good. I’ll show you.” Lace fished out a long, silky bag from her weekender; untying the ribbon, she pushed her hand in and extracted a long stick. A cane, Princess corrected herself.

Lace didn’t pay much attention. Its purpose was that of a pointing stick at that moment. “Number one, the derrière.” Vixen turned and Lace let the wooden instrument hover over the girl’s ass. “You know what to do to hit here?”

“Find the tailbone and place your non-dominant hand over it to protect it. Alternate sides, rub between a spank and another. Hit the lower region, far from the nerves up high. Where the flesh swells, that’s where I can hit. Also the back of the thighs.”

“Excellent. That’s all.” Lace congratulated. “Other spots are the back of the legs, more precisely the back of the knees and the calves. However, knees are delicate, so you can only deliver delicate blows with a restricted selection of toys. I would not recommend it. The back of the calves also offer a limited selection of toys, but it is slightly safer to go there. Still, the surface is limited and the knees and ankles are close. The risk of missing your target is high. Since you’re a beginner I would not go there.”

Princess nodded. “What kind of toys can I use?”

“We’ll cover that later. For now let’s just run through anatomy.” Lace answered calmly. “Are you good, Vixen?”

“Yup.” The other replied.

“Perfect. Turn to your side profile.” Lace asked and Vixen quickly provided.

Lace pressed the cane in a line connecting the peaks of each of Vixen’s glutes. “From here—” she moved all the way down to her mid thighs “— to here it’s good. The peak to the midthigh.”

“Great. Got it.” Princess replied. “There are other places? Like…?”

“Would you like to talk?” Lace asked Vixen. “You're the expert.”

“May I?” She asked.

“Of course, sweetie. You’re the expert in this.”

Princess raised an eyebrow at the comment, but still she stayed focused. To say she was intrigued was a big understatement.

Vixen’s sweet voice began speaking. “Other than the backside, as we’ve just mentioned, there are other spots that can be involved in impact play. While the back of the thighs and the butt can stand harsher beatings with almost all toys intended for impact play, other areas are more sensitive, more delicate or consist in a smaller expanse of skin, therefore they shall be treated differently. Both the palms and the back of the hands, just like the soles of the feet can be involved, especially when matched with instruments with a smaller surface of beating, like a slapper, a riding crop and a cane — for example. They shall be treated lightly, since they have lots of nerve endings, bones and tendons exposed.”

“What’s a leather strap?” Princess asked.

Lace lifted a finger as a sign to wait, before digging her other hand in her bag and extracting a small device, of maybe twentyish centimetres of length and five or six of width; she placed it on the table to let Princess observe it. “Handle and slappers.” She pointed. “Very noisy, actually pretty innocuous. The leather bits slap against each other and create a single impact that sounds like a double.”

“It sounds scary, though.” Vixen noted. It always made her blood curl in her veins, the heavy smack turning into a torturous feel as the hit didn’t match the noise. Fear worked, but the sensation didn’t. It was not something she liked, usually.

Lace nodded. “I haven’t used it much. Usually people like the cane on the back of the hands. Because of old school punishments.” Lace explained.

“Right. Thanks.” Princess nodded.

Vixen waited for a sign before moving on. Once she had both women’s attention, she proceeded. ”Thighs are generally all good, if they’re fleshy and plump enough. Make sure that you don’t go too hard when hitting close to private parts. While a vulva can handle a fair bit, the penis is generally more delicate in the structure. Thighs can handle all toys, just like the ass. Paddles, slappers, straps, riding crops, whips and canes. For private parts I recommend the riding crop.” Vixen smiled politely.

Princess interrupted. “The strap is that kind of… like?” She gestured a long and thin rectangle with her hands, looking for words.

“It looks like a belt bent in two, with a handle. Maybe I have it…” She rummaged in her bag. “No. Sorry. I think I left it at home.”

Princess waved her hands. “Don’t worry, that’s okay, I think I visualised it pretty well.” She smiled. “There’s more?” Princess said, marvelled as Vixen began talking again.

“Well, yes. Oh, first a small warning — before I forget. You must absolutely stay away from the belly and the stomach. Same for the lower back.” Vixen showed the various spots on her body with precise gestures of her hands. “Too many vulnerable organs left unprotected there.” She took a small pause and then moved on.

“Some people can handle hits on their shoulders and upper back, where the internal organs are protected by the ribcage and other bone structures; however I would talk with a professional about that kind of scene since you need to flawlessly master advanced equipment — people tendentially use whips and similar, or the strap.” Vixen stopped for a second, looking at Lace as if asking whether she had anything more to ask. Lace shook her head, inviting the other woman to proceed.

“Now, about delicate parts: some people like being slapped in the face, but then again, that must be clearly stated in the negotiations. I’d say you should only use hands, but maybe I’m projecting.”

“In four years, I’ve only used and seen other use hands. Also, riding crops, but usually that’s just to direct head movements or to pat the face, rather than slapping it.”

Vixen nodded. “Great. About interesting stuff, nipples can be gently stimulated with small, very delicate pats. Riding crops are excellent for this use. Also slappers. Maybe canes in some cases.” — Lace did a so-and-so motion with her head. Vixen continued, — “Some people can go very hard on nipples and technically — just like with the butt — women who have bigger breasts can stand more intense stimulation”.

“Oh, that yes. You can use, as usual, riding crops, but also paddles, straps and whips — if you’re experienced.” Lace added.

Princess nodded with an interested expression. She could mention that to Jimin. Imagining him with a riding crop, standing at the side of the bed, rubbing the leather bit against her nipples before whipping them harshly had her losing focus for a second, taking in a big breath and biting her lip.

Vixen grinned. She could practically read the other woman’s thoughts. “For women with smaller breasts and men, I would say to stay on the more gentle side for the first few sessions and eventually — once you know each other and once you know your sub’s pain threshold — you can get more heavy-handed, so to say. As I said before female private parts can handle pretty harsh whippings, especially since arousal tends to make the labia plumper and therefore protect the skin better. Still, you should start slow and work your way up. Male crotch area is a lot more delicate, however the shaft can take a medium-intense whipping. I recommend riding crops and small leather straps.”

Lace raised her eyebrows at Vixen with a proud grin. “Nothing to add. This should be all.”

“Wow.” Princess was a bit excited. If Jimin had looked that good with a few spanks, she could only imagine what he would do once she got more experienced and learned what actually drove him crazy.

“That’s a lot of stuff, I know.” Lace reassured her.

“I’m actually excited. Like, it sounds very interesting. There’s a lot of trust and knowing each other. I really like that. I think it brings the partners very close.”

Vixen nodded. “It does.”

Princess bit her lip. “I don’t want to pry but… Do you do all of that?” She looked at Vixen with a slight blush.

The woman giggled. “Not anymore, no.” She took a meditative pause, like she was reminiscing something. It felt strange that a girl so young could feel so old every now and then. That dark cloud that obscured Vixen’s doll-like traits disappeared, leaving only a fond grin in tow. “Now I do the bits I like best.” She grinned.

Lace looked at her with a bit of worry before smiling again.

“Before we actually start with tools I need to make sure that you know all you need about aftercare and drops.” Lace said seriously.

“Yes, please.” Princess said. “May I recap what we said about aftercare?”

“Yes, sure.” Lace invited her.

“Prepare the stuff before. Check for abrasions: if there are, then disinfectant and band aids. Next cold cloth, lotion and eventually painskiller. Use medicines that my sub takes regularly. Make sure that they’re okay emotionally. If they want me to leave, I do, but I stay close.”

“Amazing. Quick learner.” Lace cheered.

“Those were also in the book.” Princess commented, diminishing her feat. “Plus I did it already. Sort of.”

“I’ve seen people take weeks to put all of that together. You did a good job, stop doubting yourself.” Lace corrected her. God, these two insecure creatures would be the death of her.

“Aftercare is not only physical, but mostly emotional. If your sub wants you close, cuddle them. Jimin looks like the type to want cuddles and reassurance afterwards. Make sure you give plenty. Would you like to explain the drop Vixen?”

“Yes, of course.” Vixen intervened before addressing Princess. “I always like to talk about this subject because it can affect anyone, without any need to get involved in BDSM. ًWhen experiencing an orgasm, our bodies produce an incredible quantity of hormones that make us literally ecstatic. What happens sometimes, especially after long or intense scenes is that our bodies get high on these hormones, experiencing a sense of withdrawal once the rush is over. Such withdrawal, so to say, can cause pretty intense sadness that can lead to numbness, indifference, or even hate and depressive or aggressive behaviours. A good way to slow down this sadness is providing the body with other hormones that usually calm us and relax us. Cuddles and sugars usually are a good way to help the body produce oxytocin — commonly named ‘the hormone of happiness’. It’s the same hormone that spikes when mothers are breastfeeding their babies.” Vixen smiled fondly.

“This is incredible.” Princess said, completely amused. “So cuddles heal both the sub and the dom, I assume.”

“I think so, yes. Usually I’m the cuddler while Joon is the cuddlee during aftercare. Both subs and doms can experience the drop since both suffer the shift in hormones. It’s really about mutual care. Usually though, there are people who suffer more.” Vixen commented.

Lace spoke shyly. “Once I went so hard on a sub that I felt awful with myself after the scene was done.” Lace said. The silence felt heavy, like in some part of her mind Lace was still seeing that scene. “Usually the dom is expected to give the sub water, sweets and a cozy blanket — water for the body fluids, sweets for rebalancing the sugars after an intense effort and the blanket for emotional safety. I remember that one time the sub used the aftercare kit on me. It took me almost an hour to get back on a neutral state of mind.” It was Lace’s turn to be comforted. As Vixen rubbed her friend’s back, Princess spoke.

“So I might experience guilt and sadness afterwards and that’s normal?”

As Lace was still thinking, Vixen spoke up. “It happens, though usually, if your partner reassures you and supports you properly, you should be able to deal with it together with quite some ease. I myself have shouted slurs at my dom in the past during punishment, but that is because pain or anger make you do that. I may have sent him into a drop once, and since that time I always make sure that I praise and cuddle my dom once the scene is over. It’s important that you remind yourself that what is said during an intense scene is due to the sub’s sensations in that moment, therefore you shouldn’t give it much importance. Still, once you have your post-session chat you have every right to say ‘that hurt me, please don’t do that again’. It’s etiquette.” Vixen said with a serious note.

Princess nodded. “So cuddles, water, sweets and a good comfort blanket.”

“Normally, yes.” Vixen replied. “Sometimes shower or bath together, wash your partner clean or have them wash you. For some people physical cleanliness is also spiritual cleanliness. It eases the mind from whatever ‘dirty thing’ you’ve done during the scene. The rest is really what you would normally do during self-care, but with your sub. Facemask? Junk food? Lotion? Massage? Tea? Whatever you like as long as you do it with affection.”

Princess nodded. “This is really helpful. I just need to do anything that Jimin likes, and do it with him.”

“Yes, if he wants you close — which I assume he does, knowing the two of you.” Vixen smiled.

Lace added her own contribution. “If possible, remember to schedule a post-session chat. Whenever it feels comfortable. Normally you wait until all parties have fully recovered before saying ‘let’s talk about it together’, but some subs are already okay talking about it during aftercare. Just make sure that you know how your sub felt about the stuff that you did together, and that you tell them how you felt yourself. This is not one-sided. Power imbalance is limited to the scene: once you’re done, You’re equal again — that’s why a final sentence is necessary. It breaks the power imbalance and repristinates equality. All parties are equally entitled to support and communication.” Lace said, making sure that Princess grasped the concept. That’s where most couples went wrong: communicating.

“Thank you girls.” Princess said gently. “Thank you for the insights, and for your personal experiences.”

“You’re welcome.” Lace said heartily before grinning. “Now, let’s discuss supplies.”

Vixen cheered with a small ‘yes’ at which Lace replied murmuring ‘painslut’, chuckling playfully.

“Let’s start with these.” Lace showed her hands, letting the sleeves of her shirt fall a little, exposing her wrists. “These are your main instruments.” She showed the palms, then the backs. “You can use them everywhere. You can use your whole palm, flat, for a sting and cupped for a thud.”

“What’s that?” Princess asked.

“Vixen.” Lace called.

“A sting is when it prickles and bites, a thud is when it reverberates and goes deeper. You go with a quick, fleeting swat when you go for a sting—the palm must be flat and there must be a bit of wrist game. To deliver a thud, you should let your hand cup slightly and hit hard, keeping your hand pressed where you hit. It’s a matter of angle and speed.” Vixen replied readily, as if she were being asked what is two and two.

Princess grinned and nodded. “I see. Jimin mentioned something about it, but I don’t remember clearly. Which one hurts the most?” Princess asked Vixen.

“Well, it depends. It’s a different kind of pain and it depends on one’s sensitivity. Personally I prefer thuds, because usually it’s the muscle taking most of the impact, in case of traditional, over-the-knee butt spankings. Stings make my eyes water a little, because it hits a smaller area of skin with more pressure. But it really depends on what your sub feels.”

“It is all in the way it is delivered.” Lace stated.

Vixen bit her lip, nodding, and moved on.

“Hands can be also used to slap the face, as we said,— that should be especially clarified during negotiation — but also nipples and genitalia. Also, thighs, calves, hands and feet — though in some cases they might be too mild. Always remember that it is good manners to try the toys on yourself first, especially if it’s a toy you’ve never used before. Get familiar with its weight and density and grip, so you know how it affects you before affecting your sub. Make sure to start slow and eventually intensify, always asking your sub if they’re okay in the first place. Be careful with your sub’s pain threshold: since you don’t have direct perception of how much you’re hurting them, try to increase force and pattern a bit at a time.” Lace explained.

Princess felt sure about the directions. Common sense and the guide told her the same things, which reassured her about the fact that she would remember all the complicated passages. Sure, it would be easier to have an actual practical exercise.

But for now she would make do.

“You ready for the next?”

“Yes.” Vixen replied.

Lace tutted. “The question was not meant for you, menace.” She said, reprimanding a grinning Vixen.

Princess cackled. “Sure.”

Lace picked up another object from her bag. “Here we have a paddle. It can have different shapes and textures. Some contain small indentations, or even spikes. The main features are the handle.” She showed the part. “And a flat surface, used to hit the sub. In terms of tenacity and resistance, mine has a hardwood interior covered in a leather exterior. Oh, and it’s branded.” She showed a red leather heart sewn onto the black leather cover. “It leaves a mark.” Lace smiled cutely. “Best used on wide, fleshy surfaces. Questions?”

Princess shook her head. “Oh, yeah. How much is it?”

Lace twisted the object in her hands. “A good one is around thirty five thousand won or so. If you want something that lasts and that is actually covered in true leather, the price might be higher. I could recommend a shop that sells excellent gear.”

“Thank you. Also, you said it comes in different shapes.”

“Yes. A dom in my dungeon has a pretty extravagant one in a cherry shape.”

“With a double sting?” Vixen asks, eyes almost glittering.

“Yup.”

“Amazing. I had spotted it once but I never bought it. Maybe I’ll have it commissioned.” She mused.

“Joon would?” Lace asked, eyebrows raised.

Vixen shrugged. “I just need to be good — or bad — enough.”

“See, darling, this is a brat.” Lace addressed Princess, pointing at the other girl in the room. “Their anatomy is five percent manners, five percent playfulness and ninety percent utterly smart evil.”

Vixen smiled before cocking her head to the side prettily. “Yes, that’s me.”

Princess bit her lip and smiled. Vixen was a lot more interesting than she thought. All those cute manners and polished looks could not entirely shade the dark magnetism of her eyes. She would pay good money to see what ruckus she could cause with Namjoon in the bedroom. And it would be even more interesting to see what poised, calm Lace could do to teach her how to behave.

Lace put her paddle down before fishing something else from inside her bag. “For tonight let’s cover only the basics. I’ll keep more lowkey devices for another time. Or maybe I could show you what I have and you ask me about what looks interesting to you.”

Princess nodded. “That would be lovely. Plus I’m sure you’ll have to get back to Joon since he’ll want to see you before they leave tomorrow.” Princess asked Vixen.

“I don’t know if I’ll see him— oh, that one looks lovely!” She said, looking at a riding crop from Lace’s collection and distracting herself with it. “Yeah, I told him he should stay at the dorms and rest. His week has been hectic with all the briefings for the press conferences and tv shows.” Vixen explained as she picked up the crop, studying the red, heart-shaped bit.

“Yeah, I figure. Jimin and I are meeting for an early breakfast tomorrow, before they leave.” Princess explained.

Vixen’s fleeting gaze moved away. She seemed visibly unsettled. Still, her mood changed once more as she collected Lace’s paddle from the coffee table, the other woman not even noticing one of her devices had attracted Vixen’s attention.

Vixen rolled it in her palm a couple times, shifting it to feel the weight distribution and the texture.

Princess looked at how she studied the object, carefully taking in every detail. Vixen’s perfectionism showed in that exact moment, in the undisturbed, slow way she felt every ridge and stitch with her fingers. If she could think of an adjective it was ‘thorough’, in the first place. ‘Sensual’ in the second.

Raising an eyebrow and biting her lip, Vixen opened her free hand, lifted the paddle and delivered a heavy thwack.

A shiver ran down Princess’s spine. She could almost feel how Jimin would moan after a smack like that.

Lace turned around, looking at Vixen. “Like it?”

Vixen simply nodded with a wicked smile. “Do you know what wood it is?”

“Not sure, possibly birch or cherry tree. Soft wood but very elastic.” Lace sat upright as she was done taking out all of her collection.

“And the leather is splinter-proof.” Vixen commented.

Lace hummed in confirmation. “See anything interesting, Princess?”

Princess creased her brow. “What about the riding crop?”

Vixen smiled mischievously as Lace wrapped her palm around the handle, lifting the object. “Here. This is a personal riding crop. It has been commissioned specifically for me. It’s my favourite and somehow my brand.” She smiled fondly as she studied it. “However, I would say one should never grow fond of a vulnerable thing such as a riding crop. They break fairly easily. Anyway — the general traits of a riding crop are the shaft, the handle and the tip. In terms of length, I normally recommend minimum sixty centimeters, to increase flexibility and impact strength. The shaft should be elastic, but not too much or it loses impact strength and a submissive usually doesn’t want the whoosh without the smash.”

Vixen giggled at her side.

“What is that?” Princess asked, frowning.

Opening her palm, Lace calculated the distance and whipped the leather bit hard against the soft flesh at the base of the thumb. Princess clearly recognised the sound of air whistling before she hit her skin with a thin clap. “That’s what I meant.”

Princess nodded with eager eyes, keeping an amused silence.

“Fiberglass is a good material for beginners. If you’re buying one in person — which I recommend for the first time — make sure that it can make a forty-five degree angle when you bend the tip towards the handle. A forty to fifty degrees with a fair amount of resistance means it’s flexible enough, just make sure that it’s not too close to the breaking point. The handle is normally made of leather or very good rubber to improve the grip. Some cheap riding crops — also, the ones not intended for BDSM purposes — come with a strap to slip your wrist into. I recommend you don’t use the strap or that you remove it completely because first, you shouldn’t need it and second, you should avoid everything that keeps you from interrupting the scene and comforting your sub as quickly as possible. Sometimes even a couple seconds can be very important when it comes to subdrop. Remember this at all time, in all scenes. Remove everything that could keep you from helping your sub.”

“Okay. But if my riding crop falls?”

Lace smiled darkly. “Trust me dear, you’ll hold on to that as if it were the sceptre of England.” Princess laughed. “And if it falls, it’s usually a sign of poor mastering of your tools. Train yourself. You can use a dense pillow to learn the variety of strokes that a crop can deliver. It can be used for sensation play, simply rubbing your sub’s skin, caressing it, spending some time to arouse them before the whipping starts—”

Vixen purred at that.

Princess thought of Jimin biting his plump lips, eyelids fluttering at the gentle touch of the leather tickling his body.

“Are you with me?” Lace called for Princess’ attention, an amused grin on her face. Lace almost wanted to congratulate her for staying focused for so long.

“Yeah, just — thinking.”

Lace exhaled and wore a grin on her face. “I get that. Let me just finish this and we can take a pause. The tip is the important part of the crop. Mine has a fancy, heart-shaped tip, however, the best standard ones have triangular or rectangular tips that are a couple fingers wide on the very tip and restrict around the head of the stick.”

“Sounds nice.” Princess said.

“It is.” Vixen mused. “As Lace said, riding crops aren’t excessively difficult to use, if one has the patience to learn the basics and take some time to experiment. They can offer plenty of freedom to the dom in terms of use since they can be incredibly harsh, but also extremely light and gentle. You can use them on most spanking areas: breasts and nipples, feet, thighs, ass, shoulders and genitals, both male and female. Also the face, if you’re being light-handed enough.”

“Jesus, you’re wicked.” Lace snickered.

Vixen shrugged. “Says you.”

Princess looked at the exchange quite amused. “Okay. I think I got it. Oh, isn’t that a flogger?”

“Yes, it is. But that is for your sophomore lessons. For now, let’s stick to the beginner deals.” Lace said, slowing down Princess’ enthusiasm.

“Oh.” The other answered, taken aback.

“The bigger the toy, the more difficult it is to use it. Floggers, also called multi-tailed whips, are unpredictable because the whips are really flexible, usually made of leather, and very light. You must have excellent wrist flexibility and great spatial awareness. Once you can use your crop with your eyes closed, then you can consider learning the basics of flogging.”

“Okay. I assume canes and that fancy thing over there are off-limit too.” Princess noticed.

“Isn’t that a cat-o-nine-tales?” Vixen said, wide eyed. “It’s been years since I last saw one. Since my training.” Vixen shivered. “He had silver studs on the tips.”

“Did he ever use it on you?” Lace asked, very serious.

“Once. I didn’t speak to him for a week afterwards.” Vixen said, gaze empty. “I’ve never seen one like that in my life, though. Are those flowers?”

“Yes.They have a silver bead in the middle with some petals around it. The effect is very unusual, or so I’ve been told.” Lace answered with a chuckle. “It was a gift from one of my students. Lovely girl. Kinkier than hell.” Lace smiled and took the toy. “See. Those are meant to hurt. Mark or scar even, in some cases.” She showed the appendage to Princess.

“I don’t like that.” She replied with tiny hesitance.

“The cane is also a vicious one.” Lace suggested.

“The first time I safeworded was with a cane.” Vixen said with a meditative smile. “It hurts like hell. Normally I can take around forty to fifty spanks. I couldn’t handle ten with a cane.”

“I don’t think I like that either. My favourite so far are the paddle and the riding crop. I think Jimin likes the paddle, or at least the idea of it. The riding crop is… for personal reasons.”

“Excellent choice.” Lace grabbed a glass of water and drank, easing her mouth and throat after all the talking. “A riding crop can really gratify a dom at their first experience. You can study it, if you want to.” Lace encouraged Princess to hold the toy and look at it from up close.

Princess thanked her before lifting the crop from the table. “It’s very light.”

“Indeed. It’s a lot lighter than a paddle, that’s why it’s a personal favourite to most female doms. Plus it can be used to praise and to punish, making it a tool of great versatility.”

Princess studied the handle, with a thick leather band wrapped around the stick to grant a good grip. Lace, previously standing, bent down behind Princess. “The leather has been treated so to reduce any slipping.” She corrected Princess’ grip around the handle, placing her hand wrapped tight around it and fixing her thumb. “Like this.” Next, she placed the tip on the flat of the opposite hand. “Always make sure that there are no loose stitches here. Make sure that the spot where the tip meets the stick isn’t rough or hard or juts out in a way that could cut the skin.” She fingered the spot, tracing it. “Also remember to check the flexibility, see?” Lace made Princess’ fingers wrap around that spot, making her push it towards the butt of the handle. The sensation was extremely elastic, with a bit of give still, but far more resistance. “That is good elasticity for a versatile crop. Try it on your forearm.” She suggested, pushing Princess’ shirt upwards.

A bit hesitant, Princess lifted her dominant arm up. Lace corrected her stance, repositioning her elbow. “You only need to do a slight rotation of your forearm for now. Keep your elbow still and smack your forearm down, like you were arm wrestling but with more snap.”

Princess nodded, her eyes closing before she let her arm snap. First she heard the ‘whoosh’ of the stick cut through the air, and then the snapping sound, like a dry cracking.

“Good one. Did it hurt?”

Princess tutted. “Not too bad. The bite was pleasing.”

The sound awakened Vixen from her trance. She had been staring at the paddle for a few minutes, thinking.

“Try using it feather-light now. Like it was a make-up brush on your skin.” Lace placed the tip of the crop on Princess skin with the lightest pressure, the touch so soft that the tip didn’t even bend a little to accommodate the skin. It was simply lingering, grazing.

“I really like it. I think I’d love to own one.” Princess said enthusiastically. “Would you come with me if I go buy one?” She looked up to her friend.

“Yes, sure. You have my number, we can arrange someday this week, or whenever you like it.” Lace smiled genuinely. Her cheeks puffed up in round apples.

“I think you should check on Vixen.” She whispered.

The girl was being too quiet. It meant she was thinking. Overthinking, if Lace knew her friend well.

“Are you okay?” Lace moved towards Vixen, looking at her vacant stare, her skittish mood and the insecure nibbling on her lower lip.

“Yeah, I was just thinking...” Vixen replied, still unfocused from her surroundings. “I don’t know if Princess is okay with this. It��s her home, after all.”

“What is it?” Asked the other one, immediately alarmed.

“Would it be awkward if we tried a small simulation? Not a scene, just an exercise. For practice.” Vixen proposed. “If you’re all okay with it.”

Lace studied Vixen’s expression. “What about Namjoon?”

“I could ask him. I think he’s awake, I’ll text him. Ask him if it’s okay with him. This is nothing sexual. It’s just for learning purposes.” Vixen shrugged.

A part of Princess’ brain was already seeing it happen, her throat bobbing as she swallowed. “If it’s not too much of a bother, I think it would be really helpful to me if you and Lace tried. I don’t think I want to do it myself, but I’d like to watch.” She admitted.

“Are you in the right mindset to do this, sweetie?” Lace asked. “You’ve been on mood swings the whole night. Are you sure?” Lace asked, seriously concerned.

“Yes, I’m sure. Trust me,” Vixen said, reassuring her friend with a kind smile. “I just need to ask Joon.”

Lace thought about it. Doing such a thing with Vixen of course could be extremely helpful to Princess, showing her how a scene worked, however Vixen’s mood swings suggested that she was looking for reassurance, that she was hoping someone would literally spank her negative thoughts out of her. She probably wanted Namjoon instead of Lace, but maybe this mechanism of simulation and education was what she needed to rein in her insecurities. Vixen was a smart woman, extremely aware of her emotions and the mechanisms to handle them. Lace decided. “Okay. Call him.”

“Let me grab my purse, then.” Vixen stood up and reached for her phone at the dining table. “Thank you”, she said to Lace before unlocking her phone and finding Namjoon’s number on her shortcuts.

“Put it on speaker.” Lace told her.

The three women waited expectantly as the ringing echoed through the small room — Lace with cold ice settling in her veins, Princess with ebullient anticipation and curiosity, Vixen with a certain emptiness in her gaze, her free hand toying with the small pendant laying between her collarbones while she rubbed the flat of her upper chest.

The ringing stopped, followed by a couple seconds of silence.

“Hello?”

-----------------------------------------------

Part two here

[mollymawkwrites]

I just read (and reread sgdfhjlkl) your prison fic for watb and I'm having. Feelings. Primarily about cultivating vulnerability and tenderness in an oppressive and toxic environment which 😭

This AU is giving me so many questions tho. Presuming they continue building a relationship (which of course I'm going to presume) how will it progress? What kind of psychological toll will it take on them to keep up the performance, on Geralt particularly? I imagine it being painful for him to have to be so cold and forceful with Jaskier, especially as they grow closer, but does the greater objective of protecting him make it bearable? I feel like Jaskier would be more able to compartmentalize it, but could it get to be too much for him as well? What happens if it gets to a point where Geralt can't hide his affection for Jaskier, will that be used against them - not only by fellow inmates but by the guards? The wrath of the system is what's getting to me the most. Will Jaskier keeping Geralt "under control" as it were (meaning not tearing through new cellmates on a regular basis) be enough to maintain the status quo or will the guards find it more entertaining to play with them? Splitting them up, putting Jaskier with other more violent inmates or just torturing him themselves to torment Geralt? Will it get to the point where Geralt just tears the entire prison down and they run away to live out their days on the lam, maybe settle down on a lovely little coast in Mexico? (we can only hope) Also, what are they in for in the first place? Will Jaskier get out before Geralt? If Geralt's been routinely assaulting (or murdering??) other inmates is he EVER getting out? What will Jaskier do?

The whole situation has me thinking about the (woefully short) story of Butch and Wesley from the documentary "The Fear of 13" (which is very good, highly recommend and I think it's available on kanopy rn) where they were lovers on the outside and when Butch was arrested Wesley intentionally committed crimes so they could be together. Eventually they got separated and one of them was going to be moved to a different prison so that last night they sang to each other from across the cell block and the (usually tyrannical) guards let them have their goodbye. It's so soft yet tragic and I have so many feelings and I wish we knew what happened to them.

I'm sorry this is such a massively long ask, I've literally been thinking about this all evening and had to make some kind of comment 😅 your writing is lovely and I will definitely be reading more of it! (so maybe I'll be assaulting your inbox again soon dfghjjkl)

Gods Anon, I had such trouble keeping plot from sneaking into this fic, and you are not helping! I've been thinking about it all day long because of you!

I think Geralt would suffer greatly, both from his own self-loathing at "forcing" Jaskier to do things he couldn't possibly want to do with a monster like him 🙄 and from the opinion everyone else around them has of him. Jaskier would try to make him understand that he is very much willing, but Geralt's skull is thick and that would take some time for them to even be able to admit to themselves that they are in a relationship together. Of course having to keep up the act of the White Wolf and its pretty young prey would blur the lines in their relationship: what is an act and what is real? They both enjoy the roughness and the name-calling and the role play more than just for show. I think Jaskier too feels guilty about forcing sweet Geralt into it. Lots of guilt on both sides and no way to deal with it healthily in this violent, toxic environment.

I can see them managing to create a little bubble of happiness together though, despite the guards expecting Jaskier to keep Geralt on a leash and the inmates constantly poking at them to see if something gives. Once they get to talk and explain that they both very much want to be with each other outside of their farce, that, would the circumstances have been different, they would have asked the other on dates and had a sweet first kiss and maybe a house and a dog (not me crying about my own AU), they find a balance and a way to keep other people's venom from chipping at their love. Maybe they find allies too, jail can't be filled only with enemies after all...

As for why they are in jail for in the first place, I have to admit I hadn't settled on an explanation as I was writing it. I think Geralt has been set up by someone, probably Stregobor, because of an event similar to what happened in Blaviken? So while his "crimes" are not as bad as anything Jaskier might be imagining (and oh, imagine the angst potential of Jaskier torturing himself over what the man he is falling in love with could possibly have done to have end up in jail), he still sees himself as a monster who made the wrong choices and is not deserving of Jaskier's love.

For Jaskier, I'm not so sure, to be honest. What do you think he could be in for?

Although I am a sucker for angst, I couldn't survive a bad ending, but I don't have a clue on what could happen to them. They could escape, helped maybe by Eskel and Lambert on the outside, or some of Jaskier's shadiest friends; or Jaskier could find a way to have Geralt pardoned, and Stregobor in jail/killed at the same time, because that's what the fucker deserves.

I haven't heard of that story you talked about, but I'll make sure to check the documentary, it sounds very beautiful and heartbreaking. As I was writing the fic, I remembered that movie with Jim Carrey and Ewan McGregor, I Love You Phillip Morris, that I used to love as a kid. I might watch it again, for... Inspiration ;)

Thank you so much for your ask, and please, don't hesitate to assault my inbox again, it made my day! (Though I might have to add another WIP to the list now.... sigh)

[kayleebreanne09]

I feel so sad!

John b x reader. With a little bit of ex Rafe x reader.

So I was listening to the song You should be sad by Halsey. I’m lowkey obsessed with it & I immediately thought about this blurb idea. So the reader was with Rafe, they had a really toxic relationship & she ran away. John b saves her & puts her back together. Obviously Halsey wrote this amazing song but just for the sake of the fic, the (Y/n) character writes it. Alright I hope y’all like this because it was really fun to write. Love yall💜

It’d been 3 months since you’d ran away from everything kook related. 3 months that a certain messy haired brunette pogue had spent trying to piece your heart back together. 3 months since you ended the most toxic relationship you’ve ever had in your life. You sat on the log, curled up against John B in front of the nightly fire y’all had at the chateau. On your other side was Kie, smiling happily at you, & across the fire, JJ & Pope goofed off. These were your people now. They’d put you back together when it seemed impossible that all the pieces would ever fit right again. JJ made some stupid joke & everyone just groaned but I couldn’t help but laugh. He jumped up & ran over to me to high five me! He threw his hand up in the air a little too close to me & my body automatically flinched. My heart started to race & my vision started to go fuzzy. I ran inside, desperately trying to get air into my lungs. I raced into the bathroom, jumping in the shower & turning the water on. I sank to the floor of the shower, all my clothes still on. I sat there with my knees up to my chest & my arms curled around them, trying to keep myself from breaking. I heard footsteps & a deep sigh that I knew belonged to my boyfriend. I felt John B step into the shower behind me, sitting down with his legs on either side of me & leaning up so his head was resting on my back. “Baby, breathe. You are safe. You aren’t with Rafe anymore, no one will ever touch you again. I will always protect you” he whispered slowly drawing words on my back. He sat there drawing random shapes as the water soaked ya both. “Let’s play a game...guess what I’m writing” he then drew what felt like 12 letters. “J” I guessed for the first letter. “Yes!” He replied...we went on like that until I figured it out. “JJ is a dumbass? Really John B?” I let out a small laugh. “Okay next one” John B said as he started drawing his fingertip along the sopping wet back of my shirt. “I love you” I guessed once he’d finished the last letter. He pulled me back against him & I felt some of the tension leave my body. “Yes. & I’ll never stop loving you. I will always be the best I can for you, I’ll never let you go through what you went through before” he stated, pressing a kiss to my cheek. “I love you John B. So much” I said turning & giving him a long kiss, hoping that he could feel just how much I needed him.

The next day, I was sitting on the kitchen counter watching John B make pancakes. My gaze kept drifting out the window to the calm water. Last night had stirred up some memories that were hard to deal with. Poor John B had been up half the night trying to soothe me back to sleep from my stupid nightmares. “Hey babe” John b said pulling my attention back to him. “Yeah baby, what’s up?” I asked smiling at him. “If you’re getting overwhelmed with stuff from the past, maybe you should write about it” he offered, looking back to the pan to flip the pancake. John b knew that I loved writing. It helped me get everything out. I wouldn’t call myself a song writer but I did love taking things that I’d been through & putting them into lyrics that maybe other people could relate to. If I could just help one person get through something, it’d be making a difference & that was all that I wanted. I jumped down & went to hug him from the back. I rested my head against his warm skin & just enjoyed the feeling of having John B in my arms. “That’s a good idea!” I said pressing a quick kiss to his back. “Good! Because I already texted Kie & she’s bringing her ukulele over to help” he said spinning around & swatting me on the butt with the spatula. I stood on my tip toes & pressed my lips to his as he pulled me into him. “You really are the best” I breathed out.

Kie & I sat in the hammock together, legs intertwined. She had her ukulele in her lap & I had my lyric book in mine. She reached over & pulled my pencil from behind my ear, & slid it into my hand. “Get to writing sister, I need to hear what these lyrics sound like before I can come up with a melody. Also, I’m sorry about JJ last night. He didn’t know your history with Rafe & pope chewed his ass pretty good about it.” She said as she laughed loudly. “It’s fine Kie. I just, I know what I want to say...I guess it’s just putting it into actual words is hard. Like I’m not conflicted, I’m 100% over Rafe, I just feel like none of his friends will tell him the truth. They won’t tell him that he’s turned into this monster & I feel like maybe if someone would just be honest with him, maybe he could change & find happiness in his life like I have with John B” I smiled toward the dock where John B was cleaning out the HMS Pogue. “Start there then!” Kie replied. & I did. My mind drifted back...

“Rafe, you’ve got to stop with the drugs. I can help you! You aren’t you anymo-“ I was cut off my his hand grabbing my throat & shoving me back against the wall. “Don’t tell me what I’ve got to do bitch” he snarled. His eyes were dark & pupils so dilated that I didnt even see the man that I’d grown to care about anymore. “I NEED the money, the drugs, the nice cars...I don’t need you. So you better watch the way you’re talking to me” he said, finally releasing my throat. I sank to the floor rubbing my neck where I knew bruises would form later. I took a deep breath & stood up. “I won’t do this anymore. You’ve broken me enough. You are toxic & I’m done. I’m gone & don’t you dare try to find me” I took one final look at the monster he’d become & walked away.

Kie watched as I stared off, my eyes tearing up. I felt her grab my hand & squeeze, just letting me know she was there. “I know what to write!” I said quickly scribbling down everything I wanted to say.

“I wanna start this out and say

I gotta get it off my chest

Got no anger, got no malice

Just a little bit of regret

Know nobody else will tell you

So there's some things I gotta say

Gonna jot it down and then get it out

And then I'll be on my way

No, you're not half the man you think that you are

And you can't fill the hole inside of you with money, drugs and cars

I'm so glad I never ever had a baby with you

'Cause you can't love nothin' unless there's somethin' in it for you

Oh, I feel so sorry

I feel so sad

I tried to help you

It just made you mad

And I had no warnin'

About who you are

I'm just glad I made it out without breakin' down

And then ran so fuckin' far

That you would never ever touch me again

Won't see your alligator tears

'Cause, no, I've had enough…”

Kie leaned over eyes scanning over what I’d written. “(Y/N) this is good. No, it’s amazing. I mean, I don’t even know what to say” she said hugging me tightly. “Thanks for always being there Kie” I said, leaning my head on her shoulder as the hug ended. “Now let’s get to work on this melody!”

A month passed & id been hired to play at midsummers. JJ had heard the song Kie & I came up with at the chateau & while working one day, he heard about talent tryouts to play at midsummers. He relayed the message & Kie & I went & tried out. Apparently they liked us because we were one of the acts that were hired to play. Everything went so fast & suddenly, it was a couple hours before midsummers was supposed to start. I stood in John B’s room, sliding on the dress that I’d gotten. It was a deep vneck off white dress with silver beading. John B walked in & wrapped his arms around me, looking at our reflection in the mirror. “You are so beautiful baby. You are going to be amazing tonight” I smiled at his reflection. “Are you sure you & JJ can pull off sneaking in as waiters?” I questioned. “Of course sweetheart, we are total badassea at going incognito” he said smirking. I turned around, wrapping my arms around his neck. “Good. I don’t think I could get through tonight without you” I whispered. He leaned down & brought his lips to mine. “You’ll never have to go through anything without me” he said squeezing my hips, pulling me closer to him & refusing to let me go until it was time to leave.

The lights facing the stage were blinding. I felt way too many eyes on me & way too many kooks judging me. Kie nudged my arm, smiling over at me & started to play. I put every ounce of emotion that I had into that performance. All the sadness from an ended relationship, & all the hope that I had that one day Rafe would find happiness. He & I were never meant to be, I understood that now. I just wanted him to get the help he needed. A single tear slipped down my face as I sang the last line. I wiped it away, grabbing Kies hand & bowing as the crowd cheered. I scanned the crowd to see Pope, JJ, & John B cheering in the back! “That’s my girl!” John b hollered. Security saw him & started making their way over. “Shit. Come on guys! Mandatory pogue meeting at the chateau!” JJ yelled. Kie ran to JJ as he spun her around & she then threw her arms around JJ & Pope. “Cmon baby!” John b yelled. I yanked up the bottom of my dress, kicked off my heels, grabbing them off the ground & took off running....Launching myself into his waiting arms. He kissed me long & hard. “Time to go!” He said pulling my hand & dancing away right as the pissed off security guard dove at us. I threw my head back laughing as John B bent down & I jumped on his back. He carried me all the way to the waiting HMS Pogue & we all rode off into the night.

Rafe stood in silence staring after the girl he had lost. He knew he’d done everything wrong in the relationship. Maybe she was right. Maybe the drugs couldn’t fill the hole he had inside. He decided then & there that he would get clean. He would fix things with his dad. He finally had closure, & maybe one day, he would find the love that he knew she had found.

[221bshrlocked]

Oh im sorry i guess ny saracasm didnt come off to well in the way i typed it! I definitely meant it in like a sarcastic tone. Like of of course fan fiction is worse *followed by an exaggerated eye roll*

Like i want Frankie Morales to break my bed frame. How is writing about that worse then literally messaging people Pedro knows irl and harassing them about who hes dating.

Like do those people literally not have a brain? Are they that much of a puritan that sex fics about people who arent real is bad, but harassing a real human man about his none of our buisness sexuality is fine???

Why are these kind of women always so obsessed with men they are attracted to being in a gay relationship?? Like why is my harmless smut so bad but their weird gay men fetish not??

This is why I stay out of the pedro tag. I just look at it occasionally, and point like that Simpson's joke going "Good lord whats going on in there?!"

When I tell you I feel like the dumbest person ever for not catching the sarcasm 😩😩 but I genuinely thought you meant it because everyone in the tag certainly means it lol

But it's like you said, it's hilarious in a depressing way. I'm honest to God convinced that every time some take like this spreads like wild fire and starts am unnecessary debate and makes the fandom toxic, it's either because of minors who claim that they aren't minors but the thought process obviously makes it clear that they are younglings OR as with the case in the ever existing star wars fandom, it's the sexist homophobic racist fandom boys. In the case of the Pedro Pascal fandom, it's the former.

I think I'll take a page out of your book and stay away from that tag. Thanks for the tip 🥲🙃