#like i will leave the biggest quest last cuz i need to do everything first

[lonaami]

my sister literally already beat ganon and im over here like *collecting food and items like the perfectionist i am i need THINGS*

[papers4me]

Fruits Basket, SE02, Ep19

A rare ep divided between mom-tohru & real-girl/woman tohru!

-The sohma’s moma role (ending?) :

Once again tohru is shown as a mother figure. I know this is the backbone of the show & reason of its existence, but it’s been dragged so long now! It’s time the show graduates from this concept & moves on to deeper analysis of the characters. But since the writer impersonates yuki most of the time, I think the show/story itself will stop playing/showing mama-tohru card when yuki moves on/admits his feelings. Yuki can grow in front of our eyes but tohru won’t be allowed much growth unless her mama role is done completely. Kinda similar to a young mom raising kids, once they grow up, the mom will start to see herself as a person with interests, excepts tohru isn’t really the sohma’s mother, so the longer it takes to move her character beyond this role, the longer this role itself becomes stale & known as long last impression. However, it is promising that this is a first where a person finds motherly love in tohru yet sees her as teen/equal/friend in the same ep they discover her motherly charm!, so I guess the story/ show is getting ready to let go of moma-tohru & welcomes woman-tohru!! Moreover, this ep is divided between tohru & rin as equals! Rin acknowledges tohru’s motherly appeal but she quickly moves from it, since rin herself is treated as an adult within the show (intimate with haru), so her initial child-like attachment to tohru is treated as rin needing one last hug/break down before she reconciles/lets go of her motherly issues. We see the result right away, all rin’s interactions with tohru is based on equality as BOTH bush each other in a unique way within tohru’s journey in sohma land.

-New bond with new friend (female power!):

Tohru is the person with most friendships in furuba. Each of these friendships are unique with the other person. There are friendships with motherly/ dependent hint as of yet in the story: yuki/kisa, friendships strengthened by kyoko: hana/arisa, light friendships: haru/hiro, equal friendships: kyo/momiji (It shocked me looking back at momiji’s friendship with tohru! he was never dependent on her & he shared time & interests with her! cute lil boy!). so why is tohru’s friendship with rin any different? Tohru befriends rin based on mutual feelings of loneliness & abandonment at first, then mutual goal, mutual strong desire to fight & protect loved-ones, mutual stubbornness & mutual need to keep the quest hidden from others. The biggest differences between hana/arisa friendship with tohru & rin’s is that the former was established in the tender age of early teens & fueled by the three’s admiration & attachment to kyoko. Hana/arisa tend to care for tohru & shower her with love, pretend to not see her mask, respect the distance tohru puts in her heart, fight for her at times & always try to protect her which is awesome & sisterhood goals! but rin is different. Rin acknowledges tohru’s weakness & doesn’t see it as cute or endearing!. Seeing someone being overly kind for their own good breaks rin, she hates seeing such kind ppl taken advantage of, she challenges tohru with care wrapped in harshness, she fights back tohru’s tendency to take care of her & isn’t afraid of scratching tohru’s mask by stating the truth! Rin is harshly frank & doesn’t sugar coat her words. (sth she shares with kyo). Moreover Rin’s friendship is sth tohru makes in her youth/early adulthood years. soon, tohru is becoming an adult woman who needs to stand up for herself & her desires in the harsh world & fight back to get what she wants. It is amazing that the story is acknowledging the importance of new bonds without belittling old ones. Tohru’s friendship with rin shouldn’t be compared or put above or under her other friendships. We need/give different things from/to different ppl. I love that!

-Tohru the Real Woman:

While the ep contained a moma-tohru reference, tohru was more herself than most eps so far!! her inner thoughts were blocked again but she was given space to interact with others, a space to be a girl/a woman! Glimpses of tohru’s real character with hints of growth!! was shown this ep:

She yelled at rin demanding answers. Didn’t like to be pushed over or ignored!! YES! Showed rin that she too has things to fight for. She stood her ground to the point of making the boys leave their rooms shocked! tohru shouting & demanding selfish needs & fighting shrewdly!! “I have things I can’t give up, just as you do” You go girl!!

She interacted with kyo like normal teenage girl in love for the 1st time pleased with how much he was paying attention tor her & they flirted openly like the young dorky oblivious teenagers they are!

She talked frankly with rin abt the curse & the two bonded over their desire to break it without teaming up together. Rin wouldn't want to endanger another “haru”.

Tohru’s core was shaken with one direct question triggering past/deeply buried trauma. we saw glimpses of real vulnerable tohru as opposed to the bright always 100% optimistic persona introduced since SE01.

-Tohru’s Mother nightmare:

That was chilling, creepy & weird. it was triggered with rin’s “why do you want to break the curse?” which is odd cuz we know tohru wants to save the zodiacs, then “ what can’t you give up? What’s the most precious to you?”..then Akito is shown... weird!!! if her mom was shown, as she’s the most precious to her, then, fine. If kyo is shown, I’d say perhaps he’s the new most precious to her?.. but Akito?? Obviously, Akito’s pic doesn’t mean she’s the most precious o tohru. perhaps it calls to sth Akito said?...what tho??.. that day they only talked abt kyo’s confinement, & zodiac never ending banquet... I don’t get it? what’s so triggering abt a speech Akito said ages ago & tohru moved from it since then. Why NOW it is triggering?

-The nightmare tells us YES, her mom is the most precious.. why Akito mattered then?? The nightmare showed that tohru still hasn’t moved on from her mom’s death & perhaps still feels guilt, which is very common for ppl who suddenly lost a loved one. The “if only I said goodbye, if only I kissed you one last time or even worse if only we didn’t fight that day”... al these guilty feelings are common symptoms of not letting go yet. But what comes after the nightmare is the chilling part! Her haunting face.. what is tohru looking for outside her door? she’s trying to see if her mom is still there? ouch!

-Rin’s monologue/voice-over is giving us exposition of what tohru is feeling & what she needs. Rin notes that tohru is falling apart & breaking down. Baring the burden of everybody’s pain on top of her own buried lid! Tohru needs a haru-like person. someone who sees the real her as haru saw the real tormented rin. someone who smiles warmly for her & gently pushes her forward. Oh I get it now! Rin said tohru needs someone who opens the door! we saw tohru herself open the door after the dream. meaning that this person is yet to be admitted in tohru’s life! Off course we know it is kyo~ duh~ but it’s not this easy or simple. Tohru needs to acknowledge kyo as this person even if he really is. Her realization is her door to opening the lid.

Side Notes:

I know that the scene of kyo/tohru flirting is shown from yuki’s perspective & is essentially made to be used to further yuki’s development abt his own growth & how he sees tohru vs how kyo sees her. but I really wished that visually the scene would be given double importance. show it from yuki’s perspective & show it from tohru’s. You can do that. You actually can show multiple characters equally in one scene & hit two birds with one stone. further yuki’s growth & show us glimpses of tohru’s. Not everything regarding tohru’s development needs be shelved for later. We saw kyo’s face, but the scene moved quickly & tohru was giving her back to yuki when she blushed meaning giving her back to us. (don’t mind me, just slightly disappointed abt tohru NON-mom-mode screen time/focus that could’ve been adjusted better). no big deal..T_T.

Yuki got a mother-nightmare. Then tohru, does this mean kyo will have one too? Does this mean that their lid opening will follow the order of the nightmare appearance? yuki,then tohru, then kyo?

Haru acknowledging, blessing yuki’s growth & new friendships is cute!

I hope this isn’t the last time we touch upon tohru’s personal feelings this season. Give me hints, symbolism. Doesn’t have to be full story. T_T.

I hate/love how hot shigure is!

Shihure’s “ the sound of breaking” is epic! his schemes are paying off & he knows it. My wish is for the curse is to break without any magic involved or any big thing tohru needs to do! it would be best if it even breaks without tohru!!!! I kinda feel a hint of “depend on yourself for your wishes” subtle theme here, so tohru breaking the curse for the sohma’s negate that. Moreover, the hell with the curse & the sohmas!!!! why should tohru bear others’ burden till her last appearance in the show! I want her to let go of everything & focus on herself!! what SHE wants/needs for HERSELF! That’s an epic message for a self-denying & excessively altruistic character like tohru! but yeah..seems it’s curse-breaker tohru story.

Haru wearing kyo’s red shirt!!! which means that is after, Se01, ep.9. he wasn’t a high school-er then. (I’m not gonna calculate how old was he when they did it. lol)

I relate to rin’s feeling towards overly kind ppl!

I don’t like tohru’s elementary style pigtails in an ep where she’s more womanly than she’s ever allowed to so far..=/. Nothing against woman doing pigtails!! but we are speaking abt using visuals to express change in character & growth! C’mon show!! however, I’ll give them credit for drawing tohru more grownup/older/mature in her hospital walk scene with rin. =D! plus her clothes are awesome! 

Who thought that the kindest, cutest & most precious character would say the most cryptic, haunting & chilling words “ together..always”.. tohru continues to hide her pain.