#like i dont draw my fav anymore because i dont want comments about how they made her a predator

[peridoxikal-redux]

okokok so like, as somebody who has the Pilaf Gang as one of their faves, I REALLY did not like what was done with them in Super overall. Aaand as a result, Yamari came to exist.

She's basically just Mai's daughter. And before anyone asks, the father isn't anyone known. Just some guy that will never be seen.

I decided the gang raises her as a collective but when she hits her teen years, they grow troubled as she starts to veer more towards superheroes and becomes upset with their schemes.

Future!Yamari, along with the design of Old Mai, is just my take of Yamari in the Goku Black arc. She's not much different, aside from growing troubled when her mother wants to employ strategies she doesn't consider "stuff the superheroes do".

[blyszczopies]

one thing i miss the most about old deviantart that also no longer exists elsewhere is how you had a special tab where all your notifications (new drawings and journals etc posted by the people you watch, all the comments and favs you received, etc) would show up and you had complete control over it. if you didnt want something saved you could just delete the notification. if theres something you would want to keep forever all you had to do is not delete it. also everything was put together into categories, so if you wanted to only look at new deviantions you could do that. you could read the new comments and not get everything else from your notifications marked as seen therefore irrelevant. like just the fact you could come back to stuff without it getting buried under all the new notifications.

everything has feeds now that you can scroll through endlessly. where also all the new posts bury the older ones. if you see a long post from a mutual but you dont have the time to read that cause youre gonna miss your train if you do. sorry mate i dont think i will ever gat the chance to read that. so happy for you. or sorry that happened.

also all the nice tags i got under my drawings. or like just any tags i enjoyed reading but i did not reblog the same post again just to prev tag it. buried under all other notifications forever.

like even post-eclipse deviantart notifications tab sucks. i had so many deviantions that i havent seen, because i wasnt as active on dA anymore. but i would come back to them. except all the notifications older than a year get wiped out. for some fucking reason. i had several commens saved in a special, separate folder, because they were very important to me. i dont think i can still view them

idk man i just want her back

under read more because of how long it is. but like do you guys get it .

[captain-aralias]

Fanfic year in review - 2019

yeah - i’m going to answer all these questions too. just watch me. 

List of Completed Fics this year:

Keep Calm (Carry On, S/B and ensemble, Teen, 69k)

Sex and Blood (Carry On, S/B, Explicit, 16k)

The Sound of Silence (Carry On, S/B, Teen, 10k)

Coming Up For Air (Carry On, S/B, Explicit, 4k)

Hang the Moon (Carry On, S/B and ensemble, Teen, 30k)

The sky isn’t black anymore (Carry On, S/B, Explicit, 9k)

This is fine (B7, B/A and ensemble, Teen, 4k)

Total: 7 fics, 142k words - making it one of my most prolific years ever in terms of word count! (even though i wrote about 30k of ‘keep calm��� last year, which would take the total down to a more reasonable level). 

i answer some questions about them below the cut... 

Best/worst title?

Keep Calm is the best title, for sure, as it’s a role reversal of ‘Carry On’. The only bad thing about this title is that i love role reversal fics and i can never use it again. also... i guess as i got to the end i started to think... ‘Should i bring out this theme of calmness...? is this even a theme????’ It was a bit distracting, essentially. 

worst title is ‘Sex and Blood’, which does what it says on the tin - can’t deny it. it’s supposed to be about how vampirism links the two things for baz, right? .... but i don’t like it. also - when people comment on it (thank you! please do comment on it! please keep reading it!) this stupid title that i wrote appears on my lock screen of my phone, which i just leave lying around at work. 

but i know - i did it to myself. i should have thought of a better title. 

Best/worst summary?

i don’t know if i already pointed this out on tumblr, but i noticed recently that all my ‘carry on’ fic summaries have a [Clause A - bad or good situation] but/or some other conjunction [Clause B - something happens that causes a fic to exist!] structure, except for ‘The Sound of Silence’. 

Even having realised that, I’ve still written a summary with the same turn for my as yet unnamed bodyswap fic... 

I think the best summary is probably ‘Keep Calm’. 

Worst summary - Coming Up for Air, but I was trying not to give spoilers for Wayward Son. and it’s a PWP.

Best/worst first line?

generally i love my first lines, and hate my last lines. 

i would say all of my 2019 first lines are indeed pretty good. ‘The sky isn’t black anymore’ is straight into being X-rated so i’m not going to quote it here in case that’s not your jam, but i like it a lot. 

i also like: There’s something wrong with Baz. (Sex and Blood). Obvious - but, it works.

i don’t not like any of them, even the really long rambling first line of ‘This is FIne’.

i will call out the first line of ‘Keep Calm’ though, because i spent ages trying to work out how to punctuate it, and i still don’t know what i should have done. it currently reads: The Mage is waiting for me, outside the door to Mummer’s House.

depending on when you read it, though (and i’m sure you didn’t notice) it may have had no comma (The Mage is waiting for me outside the door to Mummer’s House.) or it might have been a dash where the comma was, or even - gasp - a full stop (because rainbow likes to break sentences into fragments so that’s ok).

 i kept changing it. this may seem like a complete waste of time (and i think the right-right answer is that there shouldn’t be a break at all - no comma is correct), but i wanted the first sentence to FEEL like ‘the mage is waiting for me’ - the place is merely corroborative detail. the point is the mage is there, about to take simon away and change the plot. hence ... the punctuation.

Best/worst last line?

as i said - very few of my last lines are what i wanted. i have not mastered them at all. too often it’s just ‘this is where i ran out of story’. the worst is the ending to the ‘Sound of Silence’ where i literally resorted to ‘Carry On’ cliche to get out of it: And he kisses me.

it’s fine, it works - but i could have done better.

the actual ending line of ‘Hang the Moon’ is pretty good i think, but the pacing of that ending is all wrong. i’m much happier now i wrote a whole extra fic so the weight of everything ending isn’t on those final hundred words. 

the BEST last line i wrote... the one that actually really works (for me) is ‘Coming Up For Air’. And I feel like I can breathe again. 

Looking back, did you write more fics than you thought you would this year, less than you thought, or about what you predicted?

apparently i wrote a lot - which i probably wouldn’t have predicted last year, although by this time last year i’d written ‘the mage’s heir’ and the first half of ‘keep calm’, which did provide much of the wordcount for this year. so - i guess if i’d thought about it, it would have seemed plausible. 

first person helps me write long. and in b7 i learned to write long. 

i guess i’m surprised because it felt like i wasn’t writing that much in comparison to some people in the fandom (and i probably still didn’t in comparison!) and i wrote several long things rather than many short things, so the list is still pretty short despite being MANY words.... 

What pairing/genre/fandom did you write that you would never have predicted last year?

strange though it may be to say - i probably wouldn’t have predicted i’d write blake’s 7 this year. ‘never go back’ - that’s my motto. or rather ‘i can’t go back, my brain doesn’t work that way’. but good to have done it. 

What's your favourite story this year? Not the most popular, but the one that makes you the happiest.

hard to say. it’s a draw between ‘keep calm’, which i love because it did everything i wanted it to. and ‘hang the moon’, which is a collection of all my favourite tropes loosely disguised as a fic. 

they’re also the two longest - and i tend to like the long ones better for reasons i have gone into before.

Okay, NOW your most popular story.

it’s pretty much a tie between ‘keep calm’ and ‘sex and blood’ - and since ‘keep calm’ was many chapters long, is earlier, and much more heavily promoted by self and the big bang, i’m pretty sure that means ‘sex and blood’ is more popular over all. 

thank you fandom, for loving vampire porn as much as i do.

Story most underappreciated by the universe?

we all know (well, those of us who know what it is) that b7 is a tiny fandom, so with that in mind, i think ‘This is Fine’ is well appreciated! <3

the story that is (to me) surprisingly about half as popular as most things that i’ve written for ‘carry on’ is ‘Coming up for air’, which i have now re-linked for you in case you never read it.

it disproves the rule that shorter porny things will be more read (although obviously the vampire porn suggests the opposite). idk, i thought it would catch those who were in the post-wayward son crash, like i was. 

the other thing to say here is that it was still extremely appreciated - i mean, it’s got about 50 times as many kudos as any of my b7 things, and overall i would say it is a thing that is well received. i know i’m fortunate to be friends with people who re-blog my stuff and people who comment, and i (in turn) really appreciate THAT. 

so - it’s not a whine. just an observation

Story that could have been better?

i think i would have written ‘This is fine’ better if i’d written it five years ago. i definitely could have written a blake-travis mindlink to make the gods weep with its perfection ;) what a prompt.

i’ve talked about how i don’t rate the endings of ‘Sound of Silence’ or ‘Hang the Moon’ as well, so i think these could have been better. if only i was better at waiting.., and thinking of an ending. or just - if only i was better at endings. 

Sexiest story?

i think that’s the one that has the word ‘sex’ in the title. because vampires are sexy. and so is informed consent.

Saddest story?

sad?? what is this SAD? 

‘This is fine’ is quite sad given that it’s also about telepathic pornography. because we know everyone’s going to die soon. 

and ‘Sound of Silence’ isn’t sad, at least i don’t think it is - but Baz certainly is sad while it’s happening. 

Most fun?

i think ‘hang the moon’ is the most fun - because it has all the things that i like best happening in it. they fight some merwolves together, they go plate shopping, simon fights lots of people, fiona is there - it’s very fun.

Story with single sweetest moment?

hang the moon, probably. the bit with the moon. 

although i was thinking... surely i should talk about ‘keep calm’ a bit - isn’t it my equal fav? and i was thinking - what is the sweetest moment there... and the answer honestly is that i think the sweetest moment is the bit where the mage and simon are gardening together and simon doesn’t know if their relationship is doomed forever ... AND THEN the mage tells simon they can watch some VHSes of lucy next time simon comes back and they dont hug, but it is ... enough <3

I’M SORRY - I LOVE AWKWARD FATHER-SON RELATIONSHIPS BEING REDEEMED. 

Hardest story to write?

‘keep calm’ took me months and there were moments when i thought - fuck, this is not ending, and i hate not being able to talk to anyone about this because this fest is going on for months. and i was fortunate that i had the idea of emailing sharkmartini who i then did not know at all, and she was enthusiastic and getting that feedback made me think - ok, this is worth doing. i can finish this. 

but also - i started writing ‘sound of silence’ immediately after the ‘mage’s heir’ finished and i eventually published it over a year later. because the device i’d chosen meant that simon couldn’t say or do anything for most of the bloody story. and that meant that nothing happened, baz, thanks for nothing, and it was very hard to write.

and ‘This is fine’ - i must have written it in a few weeks. so it clearly wasn’t that hard. but in comparison to back when i (though i) knew everything that Avon would ever think or say... it was hard.

Easiest/most fun story to write?

Coming up for air was the easiest story. i haven’t written anything else in a day for this fandom, although it is something i’ve done before, back in the day. 

most of the others were also really fun to write, unless i put them in the ‘hardest story to write’ box. so, you know - about half. 

Did any stories shift your perceptions of the characters?

i started to write ‘no’, but that isn’t true. writing ‘The sky isn’t black anymore’ shifted my perception of the way that i’d written Baz in ‘Hang the Moon’ i.e. my own fic (how wanky is that?) 

most of the others are me putting things that i think about characters into words. so i did the thinking before, rather than during. 

Most overdue story?

i wanted to post ‘This is fine’ on Gauda Prime Day and didn’t :( but i know bunnacula said that was ok ;) so i think the most overdue was the one that took me over a year to finally bother finishing. 

Did you take any writing risks this year? What did you learn from them?

eeeeeer... 

yes, maybe. i would say writing a happy ending for simon in ‘keep calm’ where the happy ending is that he gets a better relationship with his father (see above) as well as getting to go out with baz (whose happy ending is also not just about simon, but mostly is) is a risk in a fandom where everyone hates the mage so much. 

and then i finally wrote my thing about how i think the mage is actually right about many things, and fiona is classist. what i haven’t ever said explicitly on tumblr, i don’t think (though i said it on LJ) is that another reason it is so much easier for me to be sympathetic towards the mage is that he literally is a version of roj blake (the main character of my old fandom and my personal fav). obviously the mage is a blake who is a bit more autistic and significantly further off the deep end on the ‘greater good’ scale than blake ever was. but blake even also dresses like robin hood and is from wales. i haven’t said this before because i feel like it cheapens my semi-championing off him/might make people who really can’t tolerate the mage think ‘wtf? is aralias mental? why does she like roj blake so much?’ to be fair - lots of people in b7 hated him too. 

ANYWAY. what i learned from that is - these are the stories i want to tell and no one got upset, so that is awesome and i shouldn’t be so worried about what people think before i know what people think. 

i also wrote vampire porn, but i didn’t consider that a risk. because i knew that sharkmartini would love it - and that was one person and that was enough. are we all going to write more vampire porn in 2020? i hope so.

This year's theme and the story that demonstrates it most:

good question but hard to answer. 

i think the theme is ...... possibly influenced by ‘wayward son’..... poor communication is bad; good communication is good. maybe? 

and the fic that most demonstrates this is one that i have the most problems with, and that’s ‘The Sound of Silence’ where simon literally can’t communicate for the first half of the fic. and then baz solves his own problem by saying ‘sorry’ and giving back simon’s voice. 

‘The sky isn’t black anymore’, which i really like but feel i haven’t talked about much (it’s an unproblematic fav!) feels very similar and in fact i struggled to make it less about communication/saying what you want than it kept wanting to be. because i was thinking - this isn’t the problem of the fic! the problem is that it’s all too fast, right? but actually - and here we come back to the learning about the characters - it was both. 

because baz is a character who doesn’t communicate. and, like simon in ‘sound of silence’, he was also shut out from the POV in ‘hang the moon’.

What are your fic writing goals for next year?

write more! i want to get my ‘wayward son’ bodyswap out the door before the end of february..... maybe even january, but february sounds very achievable.

i have to finish my zine fic and then lop about 2000 words out of it, probably. 

i want to write another epic thing that is also about politics and vampires. it’s the one where natasha is alive, as well as other things. the problem with this one is that while i know a lot about it, i dont know exactly what the arc is - and i’m bored of re-writing simon giving up his magic to fix the humdrum (which i did... once... but i guess that was too often). so i have to try and work out what the climax is if it isn’t that - and i like to know the ending before i start...... but. my goal is to figure these things out and then write it. 

vampire porn - obvs. 

aaaand - for all of us: i will run a remix! oh yes, i will run a remix. ‘carry on big bang’ (which i definitely won’t do, it’s too solitary for me and too slow, alas - even though i keep thinking ‘i could do my vampire thing! it’s long’. it’s got to be a no) and the zine are in the first half of the year....... and i’m busy and stuff. so i thought it was going to be in december - but now i’m probably going for sign ups in march, post in may. I LOVE REMIX. i’m excited already.