#like i aint fighting raccoons at 2am to try and take the trash out

[fieryvoid-scout]

Every time I have to clean a bright red sauce from a pot. I think about this one time when I used to be a dishwasher at a country club. Long story short, the head cook at the time who was kinda a tool (not to do with his cooking prowess, he could cook, he was just a dick) that did the whole “sign this waiver to eat the Super Hot Spicy Chicken Wings” thing, you know, as many do. Well a group came in one busy busy day and ordered a bunch of wings and one of them ordered the Super Hot Spicy “You’ll probably be crying on the toilet later” Carolina Reaper Sauce (that looked fucking scrumptious I might add, but I never did get to eat it.)

Anyway, they order it, he cooks it, it gets slid my way to clean it. Shouldn’t even be a thing — a thought even. Except the way I clean dishes is by rinsing them out with a high pressure water nozzle. (Basically blasting the shit off it with water and THEN washing it w/ soap etc.)

The quick among you may be left wondering…

Yes,

I basically aerosolized the entire kitchen full of fellow coworkers with Carolina reaper sauce, it was the funniest shit I’ve ever seen. It went like this:

At first I didn’t even realize there was a problem, sure it was a hot sauce, I was doing some coughs, but honestly it wasn’t that bad for me even with me being at the epicenter (for reference, I can handle spicy food, crave it even.)

But then the next thing I hear is the head cook coughing and sputtering and gagging after giving me more cooking utensils to wash on the far side of the dishwashing station. The poor bastard experiencing his creation in the least enjoyable manner. This is when it started to get comical because after this point the whole kitchen became consumed with the aerosol Carolina Reaper sauce, soon everyone was coughing, even the old grandpa line cook that was from mexico and always acted like stuff didn’t affect him kept having to “clearing his throat”.

By this point, all the waiters and waitresses are coughing too, beat red faces from trying to stop coughing and trying not to laugh at their coworkers faces while trying to work. Better outcome than expected really, at first I thought they’d be mad (we were having a busy day).

But obviously we’re making a bit of a commotion, so the event manager walks in to come see what’s going on, and I shit you not she took maybe three steps max into the kitchen and started gagging like a fish out of water. Trying to sputter out “What” Making us all burst out laughing all over again.

Probably my fondest memory of that place (it sucked, not the waiters tho they were cool), I want to do that to people again one day I feel like it’d be even funnier premeditated.