#like holy fuck how things change in that timespan.

[nabaath-areng]

A lot can change in 10 years--

[definitelynotshouting]

Hi hello I’ve been rotating ur hunger au around for a month it’s soooo good! but one thing I just keep wondering is like, what if grian hadn’t been found out until later in the games, say after secret life? Considering that would also be farther along in Hermitcraft season 9, after the crossover and buttercups, would anything significant change in litd ?

OH GODS OUGH...... well okay lemme put it this way. Pov you find out one of your closest friends whom you deeply trust has been highkey using and manipulating you for YEARS and is the reason for a huge chunk of your horrific trauma. And didnt say anything about it, didnt try to do damage control or come clean, just accepted that this would fuck you up beyond belief and kept doing it because it meant they could keep living. Like..... listen Grian coming back after doing this thrice is already a difficult enough sell, but 5 times????? Holy shit forget it i think AT BEST he'd get like. MAYBE Scar and Mumbo and Pearl to help him. And even then I dont know if they'd be willing to stick around for a very long time. Scar, maybe, bc i think hes insane especially about Grian, but everyone else??? Jesus. Genuinely not fuckin sure

I think thered be a lot more RAGE than there is rn, and a lot more bitterness, which sure is saying something since theres plenty of that to go around in canon as it is. Absolutely fucked end tbh i dont think thered be a huge chance for Grian to ever go back not even years and years later like in ia au. Even in the face of him dying. Idk i just cant see the hermits letting him back in or wanting anything to do with him on the whole after fucking up that badly, yknow???

Three times kinda hits that sweet spot to me, where its fucked up but it was spread out over years and Grian tried so fucking hard every single time to resist, so it makes sense that things are very difficult to get through when trying to mend fences but isnt impossible. But considering double life, limited life, AND secret life all took place within s9, i think that,, makes a huge difference in how things would go, tbh. My headcanon for the au is that each "season" takes place over a few years, but even by that timeline thats still three major fuck ups in a much shorter timespan, and not given the sorta,,,, bookending??? Ig??? Of taking place during separate seasons.

So uh, tldr; bad!! it would go so so bad. Idk what exactly would change majorly-wise but i think that betrayal would sting a LOT harsher than it does in canon (which is already pretty strong) and Grian's chances of getting help would be,,,, severely diminished, oughhhhgh

[tk-duveraun]

I finished!

FINALLY! All four routes are complete in FE:3H

 For anyone new here, the ground rules are thus:

1) We love OCs/Self-inserts/???

2) Canon is only what you can explicitly learn in game 

3) Fuck canon

Spoilers below! Spoilery ones! For all routes! I suggest you play in this order:

Blue Lions, Black Eagles, Your Decision Will Drastically Change the Story and then Golden Deer.

( Your Decision Will Drastically Change the Story starts from Black Eagles; have the C+ support conversation with Edelgard BEFORE starting Chapter 11, talk to her, and you’ll see the dialogue)

What the actual fuck is Hegemon Edelgard? From her dialogue just before the transformation, she was expecting it to come, like some blast of magic from the slithery boys, but what? 

I’ve been told that random what the actual fuck final bosses is de rigueur for Fire Emblem, but I am not used to this many plotholes and nonsensical just WHAT.

Also, what the fuck happened to Claude in the Church route? Where is my son? What did you do to my son?

Someone on reddit postulated a post-apocalyptic setting because of the Agarthans and their magitech (funfact “agarthan” is the unobtanium-esque word for people who moved under ground during the apocalypse). I can buy it from the explanation Rhea gives in GD about Nemesis and Slithery Boys.

Since Rhea collected the remaining Children of the Goddess after the massacre of Zanado and built up her forces in Enbarr before the final battle with Nemesis, I think we can assume that’s how the Cethleann, Cichol, Indech and Seiros Crests got into the blood lines.

Anyway.

Earth or something, but if you zoom in in Shambala it looks like Cyrillic writing

Sothis comes from Space(tm) 

Sothis makes her children and they chill, sharing their alien tech and maybe introducing magic or something

humans fuck everything up 

Slithery Boys go under ground

Sothis rebuilds the world 

Sothis passes the fuck out in the Holy Tomb (with magitech defenses) 

The Children of the Goddess live in Zanado to not fuck up the humans again 

Nemesis is picked up by Slithery Boys and steals the “remains” of Sothis

Slithery Boys make the SotC, put Sothis’ blood in Nemesis, slap him on the butt and tell him to slaughter everything in Zanado

Slithery Boys make “relic weapons” for the 10 Elites

Seiros collects Macuil, Seteth, Indech, Flayn, presumably also Flayn’s mum and they give their blood to the budding Imperial humans to power them up to fight the Slithery Boys

Seiros defeats Nemesis, but is too weak and without enough forces to take back the other weapons

Rhea designates the relic weapons as “holy artifacts” in hopes they won’t be used against the Church and to keep track of their locations

Why don’t the humans notice that the Archbishop literally never ages?

Flyan tells Byleth “It’s hard to remember after your first sleep.” This implies that CotG regularly do a long sleep kind of thing (see also Indech and Macuil being sleepy shits) so Rhea probably takes generational breaks to sleep and let the humans forget what she looked like.

This is also supported by the fact that Byleth’s mother was only attempt 12 in some 1100 years. Rhea is batshit trying to resurrect her mother, there’s no way there’d be that few attempts in that timespan if she wasn’t sleeping. You could maybe guess that these attempts lived a little longer than humans so she waited ~100 years for one to die before trying again with the Crest Stone, but naps makes more sense. (Note: Rhea is what we’ll call Fantasy Insane, not to be confused or conflated with real life neurodivergence or mental illness)

If Rhea’s story of the Zanado Massacre is correct, why does Edelgard never mention it? She acts like everything Rhea’s done with the Church and over history is all just to grab power.

I see two possible options:

1) She is an incredibly damaged, severely tortured young woman who either forgot about it or believed that Rhea was lying when she told the first Emperor

2) The Slithery Boys have spent generations tweaking the story that the Emperors pass down in order to fit their own narrative

I think it’s more a case of unreliable narrator to create a “villain route” that has a sympathetic leader. Everything about Edelgard’s route is slap dash. Fewer anime cut scenes, worse writing, it’s markedly shorter, etc.

Not to say there isn’t an astonishing amount of overlap between Church and GD, but anyway.

tl;dr: Claude is the best and I’ve already got three damn OCs for this godforsaken game.

ps. Felix’s romance scene was much better than I was expecting, though I still think Felix/Sylvain is where it’s at. Is Felix/Sylvain/Ingrid OT3 too weird with Glenn? It’s too weird.

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #217

“roses are red, and my heart is black. we creep about the floor to indulge like rats.”

Do you know anyone who works in a laboratory? No. What was the very first social media site you signed up for? MySpace. Can you see yourself marrying your current partner? (if you have a partner) Easily. If you were in a coma, who would be making healthcare decisions for you? My mom. Are you the type of person who knows exactly what they want in life? Not entirely, but mostly. Do you have commitment issues? Not at all. What was the last thing you had an allergic reaction to? Silver. Have you gone out to dinner in the past week? No. What’s something you’ve done that sounds too crazy to be true? The only thing I think someone would actually find "crazy" would be I've been in a psychiatric hospital five or six times (I seriously can't remember). Are there any flowers planted outside your house? No. Well, not by us. There's a camellia tree by our back door that we didn't plant. What’s the weirdest decoration you’ve seen in someone else’s home? I'unno. I generally don't find decorations strange. Spice up your house with what you like. Did you have your own bathroom when you were growing up? No. Do you know anyone who never disciplines their children? I know of people. What’s the longest you’ve gone without leaving the house? Weeks. Are you more of a practical thinker, or more of an imaginative thinker? I think I can be on either end depending on the situation. Does anyone in your family smoke? My dad does. How well do you know your neighbors? I've never interacted with the ones to the right of us, but Mom knows the woman to the left, and she's apparently very nice. Mom was talking about her just the other day about how she always brings our trash can back to the fence, actually. How far are you into the book you’re currently reading? N/A Have you ever had a pet escape and run away? I don't believe so, at least not permanently. Do any of your exes know each other? Jason and Juan did. Girt and Jason know each other because of me; we all hung out a few times. It's both funny and sad now to know how friendzoned Girt was... ha ha. Sorry man. What’s an opinion you find impossible to take seriously? "Dinosaurs didn't exist." What the fuck are fossils then, bitch. What was the very first election you voted in? I haven't voted in any yet. Do you know how to make omelettes? No. I could probably figure it out, but I don't know for sure. What is your favorite summer month? Fuck summer. What do you want to be for Halloween this year? One of the witches from Hocus Pocus would be super cool, but yeah, I don't have the money to even try to make a costume. Do you have a desk in your room? If so, do you use it as a desk that you sit and work at? No. Do you wear band tees? if yes, which one is your favorite? Yes. I love my Metallica one. It's got a really cool design. Would you ever want to live in a home with all-white walls and furniture? "Not white furniture, no. That seems like it’d be a pain to keep clean." <<< Definitely. Do you have pajama days often? I'm literally always in pjs unless I have to leave the house and get out of the car. There's no point in changing otherwise; I'd just be creating more laundry. What is one thing you’re behind on? Instead of the usual "life in general" answer, I'll make it more interesting. RP. Jesus fucking holy Christ, I am over a year behind in SO MUCH because I just haven't had motivation, all the while plots have grown like mad. Thank god my partners are really damn patient, lol. And/or have other business, too. Do you ever re-arrange your room? No. I HATE moving/changing shit. Do you share a room with anyone? No. Who was your first roommate? Jason, Jacob, and Amanda. What season do you want to get married in? AUTUMN!!!!!!!! FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Frosting: chocolate or vanilla? Chocolate. Ice cream: chocolate or vanilla? Vanilla. Milkshake: chocolate or vanilla? Chocolate, more often. Do you drink protein shakes? EW that shit mad gross. What was the last type of candy you ate? Uhhhh what was it. I don't have candy a lot now, so uh... I think Airheads? What was the last craft project you completed? It was VERY weakly a "craft," but Sara's first Valentine's Day present. Which is better: starting things or finishing them? Finishing. I start things all the damn time and never finish them. What is the highest name-brand thing you own? Good question. What color GameBoy did you have as a kid? Red. What was your favorite GameBoy game? Hm. I liked a lot. We had a whole case of different ones. I suppose maybe the Spyro one I could never get far into. But I liked it anyway because yeah. Spyro. What was your favorite Backstreet Boys song? "The Call" probably tops the list, but also you're full of shit if you thought "Larger Than Life" wasn't a fuckin BANGER. Damn, "The Shape of My Heart" was great, too. BSB were/are just great, man. Did you ever wonder what it felt like to get slimed? Ha ha you mean like on Nickelodeon? Yup. Did you ever name a pet after an imaginary friend? I never had one. Do you believe in angels and demons? I don't know. I believe in spirits, but I don't know about actual angels and demons. Do you have a PayPal account? No. What race do you consider yourself? ... You can "consider" yourself a race? You don't get to pick that. Whatever, I'm Caucasian. Should unwanted animals in shelters be killed to make room? Fuck that shit. Should cows be killed for human food? See, this is why I want to return to vegetarianism. TECHNICALLY, no. It's murder upon a conscious, feeling, living being. But at the same time, humans are designed as omnivores, and surviving off of a plant-based diet is, sadly, extremely difficult. It's difficult to obtain the proper nutrients and their advised amounts to be healthy. Therefore, I can't confidently answer this question. I wish they didn't have to be, but human civilization would have an incredibly more difficult time continuing with all meat products removed for consumption. Does the technique used to kill an animal matter to you? I mean if I KNEW, yes, but at least from the research I've done, there's no real "humane" method used to kill livestock. Most live in awful conditions/are already unhealthy, too, and that should matter . Should farmers be allowed to cause suffering in animals to save money? Fuck off. Should production of medicines be justification to cause animals to suffer? No. We neeeeeeed to find other ways. Use pedophiles or some shit. Should violence against animals; such as rodeos/ bullfights be legal? Fuck to the hell no. I get some kind of dark pleasure out of hearing about shitheads being gored and stuff for it, honestly. Should homosexuals be allowed to work with children? This shit pisses me the fuck off. Of course they should be. Like I'm sorry, but your children aren't going to be hidden from them forever. Do you believe homosexuality is caused by genetics? Well yeah. You don't get to choose your sexuality; something has to be responsible. Are Americans are truly free, or suffering from controlled freedom? CONTROLLED FREEDOM JFC TRY TO DENY IT. Are there other countries that offer more personal freedoms? Not that I KNOW of. Like yeah, my above answer clearly states I think America could be better, but I don't know I place where it's actually better. Do you trust your government? Fuck no. They hide a lot of shit. Should religious beliefs outweigh science in the making of laws? Lolololololol no, hunny. Separation of church and state. What is one moment that you missed out on that you wished you didn’t? Hm. OH, that solar eclipse that happened I think last year? We saw nothing here. :< Do you or have you ever had braces? For a long time. Got them on, then didn't have the money to take them off for a while. Can you text? Yeah, but not quickly. I am - usually - very thankful for autocorrect. Have you ever had a nervous breakdown? OH BOY HAVE I!!!!!!!!!!!! What are you scared to death of? My mom dying, for one. I DO NOT know what would happen to me. Are you good at art? I'm told so at least; I'm aware I'm at least decent. It also depends on the art form. Are you afraid of needles? Nah. What TV show is the stupidest to you? I honestly had a really big problem (and have, if it's still even on) with the Teen Mom series. Yes, I do in fact believe it made looking like one cooler and more normal than it is. Do you hate being ignored? Yes; I start to think I'm not cared about, badly. Especially if it's family or "friends." Like no, I don't at all expect attention constantly, or even a lot of it, but I think it's only natural people who claim they love you should not pretend they don't know you, particularly when you actually reach out. THEN it hurts. Where do you currently live? North Carolina, please get me out. Do you like marijuana? I wouldn't know. Do you donate to charity? I can't. I seriously don't have money. Where is your favorite place to go out to eat? Olive Garden. What is your favorite TV station? Discovery. Do you think you’re clever? No. Did you wear socks today? No. I avoid wearing socks as much as I can. Know any magic tricks? I don't remember the ones I learned as a kid. Do you sleep well most nights? No. When’s the last time you baked a cake? Never. What’s your preferred frozen snack? Ice cream, yum. Do you work better in a clean or messy environment? CLEAN. It inspires me to do well and with an organized strategy. Do you know any vegans? I don't believe so. Earphones or headphones? I personally prefer earphones since they go into the ear and are just more comfortable than a weight on your head that can move easier. Do you like bananas? Yeah, but the timespan in which I enjoy them is short. They have to be "perfect." What’s a film you’ve seen that confused you? I know there are some, but none are coming to me curr- WAIT NO okay so I saw Warcraft when it came out into theaters, and I barely understood a single thing because the orcs' voices were way too deep. I need to rewatch it with subtitles. Do you ever wear black lipstick? I pretty much always do if I wear lipstick. What would you change about yourself appearance-wise? HEY can I Please fix my fucking weight??? Because I do like everything I can do already & nothing works??? :') How long do you normally spend in the shower? Just short of ten minutes, I think. If you were to get a tattoo, what would it say or what would the graphic be? *opens novel of ideas* Don't make me pick just one. When trick-or-treating as a kid, was there any kind of candy that you didn’t like to get? Tootsie rolls, ew. What is your favorite memory of Christmases past? The time my mom, sisters, and I went to a Christmas light show one night, and we got back to the car only to realize Mom left the keys in there. Sooo while we waited for my drunk dad and brother to come help us, we all chilled on the car's hood with chocolate covered peanuts and THE best hot chocolate. That place is no longer around, and I'll forever be mad tilted about it. What is the most outrageous thing you’ve done for God? Lmfao remember the days I denied evolution and gay rights? Them were the wild times. When you were in grade school, what did you want to be when you grew up? Why? First, paleontologist because I adored (and still adore) dinosaurs, then a vet as I wanted to help animals. In high school, it changed from movie director to game designer. Name the most famous person you’ve had a face to face encounter with. No one. If you could spend 15 minutes with any living person, who would it be and why? Um like have y'all ever heard of this guy named Mark Edward Fischbach because I have time to enlighten you of all the reasons- What article of clothing most closely describes your personality? Pj pants, lmao. Who was your hero when you were a child, and what did you do to be like them? Steve Irwin. I adore animals in general, push very firmly for conservation, and madly support proper education of wildlife, especially your local kinds. How did you learn to ride a bicycle? I had a bike with training wheels at first, then my dad took them off and would jog alongside me, holding the bars and then releasing them after a few moments for me to go on my own. Repeated 'til I got it! Based on something you’ve already done, how might you make it into the Guinness Book of World Records? This is going to be VERY embarrassing to share, but fuck it. I have so little reason to leave my bed that my legs have actually experienced muscle atrophy. My knees especially are extremely prone to awful pain when standing or walking. I don't really have a way to exercise in this tiny house, my road is too sketchy to walk along, and at least this time of year, I physically can't handle the heat if I was to walk in the back yard. I'm dying to go somewhere where I can swim to fix this shit. I could ramble on forever about how painful it is to be on my feet. I'd be happy enough with even just a treadmill. When was the last time you did something for the first time? What was it? Hm. I guess foreplay with a girl. I don't exactly experience new things much. What is your concept of a fruitful day? Actually doing productive shit. If you could rid the world of one thing, what would it be? Violence. What is your best personal characteristic? I am like, incredibly passionate. If I believe in something, you'll know. If I love something, it's to an insane degree. If you had to enter a competition for the “Most Uselessly Unique Talent,” what would your talent be? Being able to hide my thumb under my palm to where it looks like it's entirely non-existent lmao. What is your worst personality characteristic? I am VERY sensitive. I also have a hard time taking criticism without beating my ass up because I feel like I did something "bad." I don't get defensive, I just get hurt. Man, I could go on. There's a lot I don't like about myself. If you had to be a teacher of something, what would you teach? I'd be most interested in teaching science. How would you like to be remembered? I loved ferociously and spoke strong of peace. What is one thing that you constantly think about (other than material things)? The future. Does your country have free healthcare? *points at top five list of things America needs to fucking fix* Does your job allow visible tattoos? N/A How is your road rage? I drive so timidly and rarely that I don't think I really even have a clue. Who are your closest friends and how did you meet them? I'll exclude Sara as she's more than "a close friend." I don't have many close friends otherwise tho, so really... I think only Girt applies. We met in high school band. Well, then there's Alex, but considering she now acts like I don't exist as well, I don't know how close we really are. But anyway, we met in WoW because we were both camping the time-lost protodrake and talking w/ others in the general chat... but she and I really clicked. That was an awesome day. Started some damn adventures with her lmao. Are you still cool with any of your exes? The only two who may still have a problem with me are Jason and Tyler, but I have no bad feelings towards them. What Hogwarts House are you in? I took quizzes once for a survey because I was curious, but I couldn't answer most of the ones I found bc they had HP references I didn't get. But anyway, I think Hufflepuff and Gryffindor were pretty much tied. What’s the next special event in your life? Returning to school. :') Whose birthday is coming up soon? My nephew's. :''''') Do you delete people from Facebook if their views are vastly different than yours? It depends on the views and their severity. Usually I can handle averse opinions if you're actually a friendly person and composed and mature about what you believe and how you express that. What’s your favorite thing to put on bagels? Cream cheese. What’s the most important key on your key ring? I only have one, and that's to my house. What was the last argument you got in about and who was it with? AHAHAHAAHAHA okay so. There was a video on FB of a pet meerkat having its belly rubbed, and it was chirping happily. It was very cute, but especially because this video was on a big page, I commented how awful and unhealthy of an idea it is to have a pet meerkat for both it and yourself. It's illegal in a lot of places for good reason. I got a lot of agreement, but of course there was one imbecile who disagreed enough to tell me to shut the fuck up. Now I am normally very, very terrified of confrontation or even the HINT of it, but for once in my life I couldn't have been more unfazed. At what age did you start picking out your own outfits? I don't know. I've come to find via surveys that I can't really remember events by ages. How spicy do you like your food? Pretty spicy. Spicier than most like, but I don't enjoy it when it's just pure pain. What was the last really intense pain you felt? You know that awwwfuuuulll pinch of pain you sometimes get in your ribs when your lungs expand to a certain, small amount? That. I couldn't take deep breaths for anything. What is the best thing that’s ever happened to you? Recovery from the breakup. What are three things you have been a victim of? Uhhhh. Idk, nothing major. What is your passion? Wildlife conservation, probably more than anything. When was the last time you truly felt alive? Ha, good question. How many siblings do you have? Technically six, but I don't know one at all. Are you married? No. Are you dating someone? Yeah. If not, do you wish you were dating someone? N/A Do you want an indoor or outdoor wedding? I'm not sure. What states (or countries) have you lived in? Just one. Does your first crush know you liked them? No. Do you wish on stars? Nope. Are you happier now than you were 10 years ago? I don't know. I can't really remember exactly what I was like at 13. I think I'm maybe happier now? Are you happier now than you were 5 years ago? Yes. ^If not, why not? N/A ^If yes, why? My depression is under control. Do you live in your dream house? Definitely not. What was your first job? Sales clerk at GameStop. ^Did you like it? No, thanks to feral social anxiety. Have you been bullied? No, very thankfully. What do you wish people knew about you? I sincerely care about my loved ones, a lot, even though I have trouble being the one to reach out first. What health issues do you have? A lot. Don't even feel like putting them all together. Do you still cross paths with your first crush ever? No. What is your favorite Bible verse, and why? None. Do you have a secret nobody knows? Yes. It's nothing major, just little things I don't want to share. Who are some of the most selfish people you have ever met? I don't know. Is there anyone you want back in your life? Yes. What color was the house you grew up in? True shit, I somehow don't remember for sure. I think it was brick? What was the name of the first pet that you loved? Charcoal, a cat, was the first pet I had a serious, deep bond with. Do you receive more insults or compliments? Compliments, I guess. Do you meditate? No. Do you pray? No. Have you ever seen a spirit/ghost/shadowy figure, etc.? I've sure as hell seen something. What would you ask a genie for, if you had three wishes? World peace, end of disease, and the end of poverty. When someone messages you and you know it’s going to be rude, do you ignore it and not read it, or do you read it and reply? Honestly, most of the time, I ignore it. I am so, SO sensitive, so my feelings are super easily hurt by what others have to say. Do you find online drama stressful? Yes. Even more than irl drama because you have to wait painstakingly for them to reply, and you can't hear their tone of voice. How stressful is your life? I'm pretty damn stressed for someone who's trapped inside their house lmao. Was any of your home decor inspired by Pinterest? No. Do you do yoga? No. What is something you have tried and hated? Oral is NOT my jazz. Do you have regrets? Yeah. Are you mad at someone? No. What is this month’s calendar picture? I don't have a calendar. What is your last ex-boyfriend’s or ex-girlfriend’s name? Technically Donald. Do you have an ex-friend that you miss? Yep. What color do you want your wedding dress to be? Most likely black. Would you rather go out for pancakes or steak? Pancakes. I like them more in general, and I'm also suuuper picky with steak. What’s your favorite Ramen noodle flavor? The only kind I've ever liked is the Yakisoba brand of spicy chicken. How do you feel when you read the Bible, if you read it? Encouraged? Angry? I don’t read it. Have you ever suffered from anxiety? I had some anxieties as a little kid, and I was officially diagnosed with it in the 6th grade. Have you ever suffered from depression? Since the 7th grade. What is something a lot of people like but you don’t? Pie is what came to mind first. What’s an uplifting song you like to listen to? "High Hopes" by P!ATD. Think about the person you fell hardest for. Why do you think your feelings for this person were so strong? How is he/she different compared to everyone else you’ve had feelings for? Well, he was my first real love. They're always special. I was fucking crazy for him, and it grew to an unhealthy degree. Trust me, you can love too much. He made me happy when so few could back then, and we had a connection unprecedented in my whole life. He himself felt like my home. I could write you a goddamn novel on why I felt so strongly. Have you ever caught your friend cheating on their boyfriend/girlfriend? If you have, what did you do about it? If you haven’t, what do you think you would do? No. Quite honestly, I'd tell them. I could NOT keep that a secret. Whether they believe me or not, I'm not withholding that from them. When your last relationship ended, how long was it before you felt ready to think about being with someone else? I know this technically sounds bad, but Sara and I started dating the day after I broke up with him. One of the reasons we split is because I realized I liked her. It was so quick because I never had to "move on;" I never came to be truly interested in him romantically. Who was the last person you talked to before you went to sleep last night? Do you remember what you talked about? Sara and I were texting, but I don't remember about what. When are you at your happiest? When I'm with Sara. How many people have you kissed? Three or four. I don't really remember if I ever kissed Girt. How many of those people are you still friends with? Two. Where did you go, the last time you left your house? Mom and I went to multiple places. She had errands to run. Do you like your singing voice? Rarely. I think it fits only a few songs. Are most silences awkward for you? UH-HUH UH-HUH. Name someone you wish you had never met. Why? Jabari. He was scary and almost assaulted someone in my family. Who has the nicest singing voice, that you know personally? Probably Sara. Say something nice about someone you really don’t care for: He loves his kids to death. Ever won school awards? Yes. Do you drink more soda than anything else? Not anymore, thankfully. Do you curse a lot? I curse possibly more than anyone you know. Have you ever been in a courtroom? Yes. Do you eat a lot around Thanksgiving? No. I actually don't like 99% of Thanksgiving food. Were you a chubby child? No. Are you afraid to sing in front of people? Yes. Do you enjoy your family? Yeah. When did you last dance with someone? I forced Sara to last June lmao. Do you feel awkward watching sex scenes? VERY. Did you ever have senior photos done? No. Are your parents protective of you? Mom is for sure. I don't see my father much, and he's changed a LOT since the divorce, so I can't really answer for him. I know he is to some degree, I just don't know how much. Have you ever been bullied? I've had some mean shit said to me, but I don't believe I've ever really been consistently "bullied." Do you ever help decorate during the holidays? No. I just don't have the motivation and don't really care enough to put things up that're only coming down in two months. Do you have carpeted floors? Only my room and my sis's old one. Can you count to ten in another language? German, yeah. Have you ever been arrested? No. Do you always lock your door at night? Yeah. Do you get allowance? No, never did. Do you have a Facebook? Yes. Do you enjoy the presence of children? In most cases, no.

[corvid-knight]

Demon Eyes - chapter 14

https://archiveofourown.org/works/13740258/chapters/32482539

It's a good two hours before Dirk makes his way out of his room, which means that you're actually in the kitchen, perched on the counter and watching Hal keep two separate chats going, review the damn footage he collected for the thousandth time, and work on some kind of coding project at the same time. Karkat took one look at the shikigami's setup, shook his head, and headed over to start rummaging through the fridge and cabinets.

Kankri's disappeared off to you have no clue where. You do kind of wonder where he went, though.

Then Dirk steps into the kitchen, trying to gather his hair up into a ponytail again and blinking in just-woke-up bewilderment. "Who the hell is the guy asleep in the bathroom?" your cousin asks. "We didn't have—did we do something? Where the fuck did my shirt go? Hal. Hal, you fucking asshole—"

At this point you realize that you should probably alert Hal to the fact that somebody's trying to get his attention, since he's got his headphones on. He huffs and tries to snatch them back when you carefully pull them down, not looking away from the screen until he figures out you won't be giving up that easily.

When he actually gets a look at Dirk, the shikigami relaxes. A lot. "Oh."

"Yeah, 'oh.'" Dirk sighs and shakes his head, pulling out a chair to sit down in and absently tracing his fingers across the web of pale scars across his collarbone. "Did you take my shirt?"

"That'd be Karkat." Hal closes down the screen that's full of cryptic coding shit, cocking his head. "Although to be fair, the shirt was pretty much totaled anyway."

"...why, exactly?"

Instead of answering, Hal asks, "What do you remember about what you've done today?"

Dirk shrugs, brow furrowing as he thinks. "Got up. I didn't really want to, because Jake's prescience was being an asshole last night, kept me up talking about...damn." He shakes his head slowly, his hand moving up from his neck to his forehead. "A job, right? Getting rid of something—some kind of—siren? Except...fuck, Hal, what the hell happened?"

"You don't remember that shit?" you ask him, frowning when he shakes his head. Weird. You remember what happened, now; you got ambushed by what, four of those nasty hybrid things? No, five, because there was one that almost did take you out, after you killed the first one and the other three; you've only watched Hal replay the video of you stabbing the damn thing twenty times.

Dirk just shakes his head, looking even more confused.

Not like you actually remember either, Karkat points out to just you, dropping what sounds like an entire handful of silverware in the sink and coming over to lean against the counter next to where you're sitting. "How do you feel?"

"Confused, obviously." Your cousin shrugs, nodding at the video that's still playing on one of Hal's laptops: Jake reloading, hands moving too fast for the camera to capture as more than a blur, two of the hybrids dangerously close to him. "I'm, uh...I'm guessing we did the job, though?"

"Yeah." Karkat, what the hell do you mean, I don't remember? I remember fine.

"Why the hell can I not remember it, then?" Dirk asks, at almost the same time as you ask Karkat that silently.

The demon huffs and crosses his arms, closing his eyes for just a second. You can feel him working out how to explain shit; it's like a mental sense of a deck of cards being tapped edgeways against a flat surface to order them. "Those fuckers take your short-term memory," he says after a second. "I'm immune, obviously, and so is Hal; the memory wipe's done through their song, and it doesn't do a damn thing to demons. Thankfully."

Yeah, or I'd be dead, you think, and you know that's true even though you're not sure why. "Dude, I remember, and I'm not—"

"You don't remember, idiot." He says it with nothing but affection in his voice, though, and reaches over to pat your hand. "You've been sitting here watching what happened for what, half an hour? You see yourself kill the fuckers, so you know you did kill them. That's what you remember." He frowns, and adds to just you, Trust me, that's for the best. I remember what you don't—

How come?

Because. You showed me when you were fucked up over it, before I did damage control on your mind.

Hal sighs before you can tell Karkat that you do, in fact, want to remember all of whatever happened. You've been trying to figure out why the hell you nearly let that last hybrid take a chunk out of you, after all. When you look over at the shikigami, you see that he's torn between exasperation and amusement. "What?"

"Isn't it usually considered rude to have a private conversation in a public setting?"

Oh. Yeah. Maybe Karkat can split his attention well enough to hold a conversation through the empath link and pay attention to what else is going on, but you really can't. "Oops."

"No oops. He can just shut the hell up." Karkat bares his teeth in a not-quite-grin at Hal, growling very softly with each word. "This barely counts as a public setting, anyway, and Dave's learning. You make him feel shitty about the fact that he is learning, and you're going to regret it."

You're a protective asshole, you think at him. I love it. Sweet as fuck.

That growl softens and turns into something closer to a purr for a second. Good, because I'd rather not quit being a protective asshole to you.

As you lean over to run one hand through Karkat's hair and fuck it up as much as you can, Dirk points out, "I still don't have a fucking clue what happened. Or who the guy in the bathtub is."

You don't have any idea what the answer to the second question is, but Karkat does. "That'd be my brother. He'll be fine, that's normal." He growls playfully at you, letting you mess with him for a second before ducking away from your hand. "Show him the videos, Hal. His and Jake's, preferably at the same time. Come on, Dave."

You slide off the counter as the shikigami nods and starts tapping at his laptop. "Come where?"

"To help me finish making food, duh."

For whatever reason, Dirk doesn't end up even kind of remembering the whole fight, even after watching the footage repeatedly. He flat-out refuses to let Jake watch it, either, and Jake doesn't really argue. It's weird, seeing how much he trusts Dirk. You're not really sure why.

But Jake and Dirk are fine, and that's pretty damn important. Kankri sleeps for almost a full day, and when he does wake up he just sort of disappears. He's still around somewhere, close-ish—Karkat grumbles out a half-explanation, something about Kankri being more into the whole family thing than he is. Which you get. At least the angel's not being all that pushy about it right now.

Anyway. Two days. You have godawful dreams that you can't quite remember, full of weird bright singing tones, but Karkat's there every time you wake up. You can't bring yourself to tell him I love you again in return, which fucking sucks—that's what you're supposed to do, it's fucking true—but he tells you he loves you, mixes that lil' statement in with the other soothing shit that he repeats until you settle again. It's...really good. You don't have words to define how good it is.

Roxy shows up on the third day, about halfway through Jake trying to give Karkat another highly unorthodox tarot reading, both of them trying to ignore the fact that you and John are watching way too attentively, waiting to see what white card he's going to draw next. You just hope it's "Bees?" There's so many jokes that can be made from that card.

When somebody knocks at the door, Dirk's the only one not currently focused on something, so he's the one who goes to answer it. You hear an excited squeal and Dirk go, "Hey, wait—" and then a loud-ish thump.

John looks up. "Oh yeah...guess Rox came to pick Hal up before she goes over for the cleanup."

"My future is not fucking 'horrible laser hair removal accidents,'" Karkat snaps as Jake lays down another card. Go say hi, Dave.

You coming? You kind of wonder if he's worried about Roxy's reaction to there being a demon with you. You know you are.

"When Jake finishes this stupid thing." He growls and folds his arms, rolling his eyes as Jake adds Intimacy problems to the spread. "English, I'm going to destroy your fucking Cards Against Humanity set.

"It's John's," Jake points out absently as you get to your feet.

"Do you think I care?" Karkat groans at the next card, and you have to resist the temptations to just sit down and wait for him to be done.

Stop being a clingy fuck, you tell yourself. Karkat probably heard that, but he makes the wise decision to not call you out on it.

Roxy's more-or-less attached to Dirk in the doorway, arms wrapped around him and laughing in delight. The thump you heard was probably the briefcase lying on the floor where she dropped it. There's two slightly-confused-looking guys just outside, watching the two of them uncertainly.

Well, it's nice to know that Rox hasn't changed beyond letting her hair grow out a bit and dying it bright pink.

Dirk notices you standing there awkwardly after a second, and deftly extricates himself from her hold. "Yo, Dave."

When she hears your name, Roxy's eyes go wide, focusing on you with an expression that's both surprised and (again) delighted. "Holy shit, Dave!"

Oh fuck.

She's got you wrapped in a tight, peppermint-scented hug before you can do more than open your mouth. Thankfully, it lasts maybe two seconds; then she's pulling back, holding you out at arm's length and grinning at you. Okay, the snakebite piercings are new, too. And cute as hell. "Damn, Davey, nobody told me you were here! Is Bro here too, then? Becuase if he is I'm gonna kick his ass for taking off for this long, making me miss out on the whole timespan when youcouldn't kick my ass—"

"Translation to normal-people-speak: 'hi Dave, I missed you, you got taller,'" Dirk interjects dryly, retrieving the briefcase. "If you feel like kicking someone's ass, go after Hal, since he obviously didn't fill you in on, uh. Current events."

Roxy glances at him, raises her eyebrows, and obviously sees something in his face that tells her to not ask. Instead, she grins at you again, letting go of your shoulders and instead slinging an arm across them. "Guess he didn't. Want to help me kick his ass, Davey?"

"Nah." You have to grin back and lean against her. Dammit, you're still a hair shorter than she is. What kind of justice is this? "Maybe later. Or like, we can go find something that actually needs its ass kicked, let you take out your aggression on that."

"Dirk would like that. Make me do the work." She gives him a wicked grin, squeezing your shoulders gently before letting you go and taking her briefcase back. "That'd mean he has to be the one who handles the aftermath, though, and I dunno how that'd work out."

"Badly," Dirk supplies, leaning over to look past you, at the guys still standing outside. "You two know you're allowed to come in, right?"

"Come in or wait, whichever you want, but I just wanna pick up Halexander and go do my job right now." Roxy smiles too-sweetly at Dirk, and laughs when he sighs. 'Yep, when I come back I'll be annoying the shit outta you for a couple days at least. My social calendar's clear, and I want to catch up with Dave."

"Did I complain?" Dirk asks you rhetorically as Roxy brushes past him to get to the main room. He's smiling, though, just a little.

"I don't think anybody wants to complain here," you tell him. Then you have to stop yourself from going tense in response to the very strong surge of surprise and startlement you get from Karkat.

It's an understandable first reaction to Roxy's personality, after all.

What isn't understandable is the fact that Karkat says he wants to ride along with Roxy for the cleanup. And that he immediately tries to tell you that you need to not come along.

You look at Roxy, try to decide if you're allowed to try and defend your point, and realize that you don't have to, at least not so she can hear. Instead of saying anything, you meet Karkat's eyes and frown at him. I'm coming.

The demon opens his mouth and closes it again, scowling right back. You're not fucking coming, Dave.

You're not going without me. You don't think about why exactly the thought of him going somewhere without you freaks you out this much. If you did think about it, you'd be admitting how fucking clingy you are, how stupid it is that you feel like if he leaves you'll never see him again. That you're going to be alone, no Bro, no Karkat—

"Dave," Karkat says softly. When you focus on him again, he continues. I'm not going to leave you. You wouldn't be alone, anyway, there's Dirk—

Yeah. That's your family, Dirk and John and Jake, Roxy and Rose, all the hunters. All the shit you've been told about being alone if Bro died or if you left him, that was bullshit.

You know that.

You also know that you're not letting Karkat walk out of here without you right now. Can't fucking do it.

"I'm coming," you tell him again, and cross your arms and wait for the argument.

Instead, he leans forward and cups your face in his hands, eyes searching your face. There's going to be blood, Dave. I know you don't like that.

...yeah. There was a shitload of blood in the video, you "remember" how fucking messy everything was, but. I'll be fine, man. Walking out is always an option, right?

"Exactly. And if you need to take that option, you better fucking do it." Karkat nods and lets go of you, turning to Roxy. "So you have spots for Dave, me, and Hal, right?"

She cocks her head to one side, looking between the two of you curiously, but nods. "Yeah, of course—worst case scenario is that Ethan or Rick rides in the back, but I'm pretty sure we have seats for everybody."

Karkat glances at you, and the corner of his mouth twitches up the slightest bit. You could always sit on my lap, Dave.

Roxy raises an eyebrow at your laugh, but she doesn't ask for an explanation. Just leads the way out to her vehicle.

[sending-the-message]

The grocery store I work at is hiding something. (Part 2) by TheBaconGamer21

Part 1

Hey, guys. It's been almost three days since the last post, and a good bit of stuff has happened in that timespan. The day after I posted the previous update, I worked my typical shift, 5:30PM - 2:00AM. The janitors were shorthanded, and so the managers wanted certain departments, like mine, to empty all the nearby trash cans in order to help them out. For electronics, that would be our little can behind the register, and most of the cans in the back. That included the managers' offices. I was elected to be the one to get the trash, and around 7:00, I started emptying the garbage cans. I went back to the managers' offices and emptied the cans one by one, until I got to the main manager's office, where the security camera feed is visible from. While I was getting the trash, I glanced over at the monitors, and saw the feed from the camera facing The Door. There wasn't anybody back in the loading bay, there usually never is around that time, so it was just live footage of the door. I stared at it for a few minutes, starting to get the feeling of dread, but not being able to look away.

After a couple of minutes, I noticed something. The door was starting to slowly open inward, as if someone had lightly pushed it, but it opened all the way. When I saw that, my heart started racing, and I glanced out of the office and into the loading bay, and saw that the door was in fact open, with that same dark void staring at me. I was gonna just grab the trash bag from the office, dump it, then head back to electronics, but I figured that it'd probably not be good to leave it open. There was just something in the back of my mind that was screaming "Close the door." I walked over to the door, all the while feeling more and more uneasy as I got closer to it. I got close enough to close the door, and reached in to grab it, when I heard a whisper. It came from the hallway. At least, it sounded like it.

"Toooodd..."

"Come in, Todd..."

"You know you want to..."

At that moment, I grabbed the door and slammed it as hard as I could, and then stood there for a moment, trying to process just what had just happened. I made sure to back away from the door for safety, and after I calmed down to the point that I wasn't shaking and my heart wasn't beating hard enough to be visible through my chest, I went back to electronics and didn't tell anyone about what had happened. I just wanted to forget it. I was nervous for the next seven hours.

By the time I had gotten home around 3:02, I had mostly forgotten about it, or at the very least, I had calmed down to the point that I could properly think. I went to bed, and didn't really have any dreams about the door, believe it or not. I was off yesterday and today, so I didn't have to worry about any bullshit from that door, or so I thought. I woke up yesterday morning and went through my whole morning routine. Showered, brushed my teeth, changed out of my pajamas, and cooked breakfast(Bacon and eggs, if anyone was wondering). Nothing out of the ordinary happened until I was making the scrambled eggs. While I was stirring them, I heard this ghostly whisper from behind me.

"Toooodd..."

All the color must have drained from my face, as I slowly looked up, and turned around. Nothing. I went back to the eggs and finished them without anything else happening, and I went into the living room to watch TV while eating my breakfast. I was watching some old game show from the 70s that usually airs on GSN around 7-8AM. I think it was Card Sharks or something like that. Anyway, while I was watching that, a door in my house slammed shut. I was understandably startled, and went to investigate. My bedroom door, which I had left open, was closed. I tried to brush it off and turned to head back to the living room, when I heard the knob turn. I looked around to see the bedroom door slowly open on it's own. "Fucking A," I said out loud as I started to realize what was happening. I heard a crash come from the living room and ran in to see that my plate of bacon and eggs had been thrown to the ground, and had shattered. Then my TV started flickering and losing signal for a couple seconds, then it returned to normal. I was freaked the fuck out, and I did the first thing I could think of. I called Louis.

L: Hey, man. Whatcha want?

M: Hey, Louis. Look...Something weird's going on in my house.

L: What? What do you mean?

M: Like, doors are closing and opening on their own, items are being thrown to the grown, I'm hearing my name whispered, and my TV keeps flickering on and off.

L: I told you not to buy a Toshiba, but you didn't listen to me, man.

M: Look, Louis. This is serious. I...i think there's a ghost in my house.

L: What?! Todd, you're really starting to sound nuts. Ghosts don't exist, dude.

M: I know, but I think this stuff...might be connected to the door.

L: The door at work?

M: Yeah. Look, last night, I went back to get the trash from the managers' offices, and while I was in Atkins' office, I looked at the security monitors and saw the door slowly open. I went to check it out, and decided to close it back. When I walked up to the door and went to close it, I heard a voice whispering for me to come in. it was the same voice that i've heard in my house.

L: Man, that sounds creepy. I gotta be honest with you, that door did give me the heebie-jeebies when we opened it.

M: What should I do, man?

L: I don't know. Hang on. I'll be right over.

When Louis got here, he tried to see the ghost stuff for himself, and after 30 minutes, started cracking jokes about how I was "lying" and that I was "just lonely", when my TV fell off the entertainment center. It didn't just slowly fall, like it got hit with a light breeze. It fell as if someone had grabbed in and tossed it to the ground. The screen shattered as soon as the TV made contact with the floor. "Holy shit!" Louis yelled, as he was just as startled as I was. I was also feeling abit of sadness. I payed over $300 for that TV. When Louis saw that, he basically said "Fuck that." and left. I looked up what I should do, and all answers led to psychics. I got the number for a relatively good psychic and asked her to come check my house, to see if I had any hauntings or anything. She said she could do it and would be out in 3-4 days. I'm still waiting, and more paranormal stuff has happened. Mostly doors opening and slamming, so not much worth noting. I'll update after the psychic is done.